Finally get your family OUT OF YOU & be the true self you were never allowed to be 👇 Access my free training - jerrywise.ewebinar.com/webinar/free-training-10027 ‘Road to Self’ Program: Join 10,000+ people who have transformed their lives! www.jerrywiserelationshipsystems.com/road-to-self
my own family scapegoated me until #1 brother came with me to my bank.. Saw me interact & said" CAROL, they Like you?" he was amazed& saw me- finally as a Sucess!
Oh this is beautiful! 🌷 The painful decision to go no contact is paying off for me now, as I'm able to continue to go inward in my healing. I see how the standing up for myself and placing a boundary was my first step. This video is confirmation and help for me. As always, you are a blessing with your knowledge and truth.
I am an ACOA. Thanks to you I know that and I know it’s real. I am 42, will be 43 this month. In January I went to a family funeral and broke down in front of an aunt and it was uncontrollable. I was NOT expecting that. The trigger: my alcoholic father was there. I was like Wow, this is real!
Thank You For Sharing I Have Been In A Narcissistic Relationship For Over 6 Yrs Im Currently Seeing A Therapist Do To The Emotional Abuse I Suffered. I Was Horribly Punished On And Off With The Narcissists Silent Treatment Through Out Our 6 Yr Relationship. I Struggle With Going No Contact It’s Very Hurtful Being Abuse By A Narcissists It Takes Yrs To Heal..
Did you just recited my life story? Lol. That "box" sounded too familiar, triggered and kept there. Broke out 4 yrs ago, divorced my husband at the age of 60 after being married 30 years. Felt great. An instant relief actually. However after I fell sick, my children turned against me, and I went to "pendulum" mode, could see narc tendencies (God Only Knows) and a lack of emphathy. To recover from them (after attempts to make them see the truth failed), I decided a month or so ago, to just die (not physically) ...just sort of disappear in order to try and forget them. Which is what they want anyway. I love them both a lot but could not take the pain they caused me and refuse to be emotionally abused anymore. Hope this will get me closer to the 90° mark and not push me off the edge God Knows! Am 64 now, know I am better off in "solitary confinement" lol which was their punishment was if I objected to anything they said or did. Covid 19's Social distancing / isolation worked out for me, as what I got, when "in contact" on their terms was more hurtful. No love is better than fake love. What also helped, is not referring to them as my "children". They are 30 and 27 so adults...I refer to them by name, its not breaking relationship just distancing. It hurts less for now. One day maybe things will be better between us, for now I have found ways to survive and heal.
@@annainari1222 Thank you xx. Have my down days, but hopefully won't relapse. On the mend with the Grace of God. My focus is totally on mastering a new language, it's slow cause I am 64 and was never good at languages, but something has clicked and am on a roll :)
@@jerrywiseYou are welcome! I really appreciate your informative videos. Currently in a psycho-dynamic therapy and using your work as an enhancement of my recovery process. Thank you!
Hey, not to poke holes or anything, but I believe the word you're looking for is 'titled' and not 'entitled'. I watch a lot of your content and I appreciate it a lot, just a little thing that I keep noticing. Thanks for the good work that you do!
How do you deal with the fact you're happier, and are on the journey to finding your authentic self, FINALLY and the minute you are in contact with your family everything becomes reversed?
I hear you... I experience the same and get very frustrated with myself. It's as if no time has passed and as if all the years of self discovery and personal freedom vanish gradually and continually to zero since I returned "home".
Wow I feel the same way. I know I'm happier without them. But I keep letting their abuse back in. It does not feel good to associate with them but it feels familiar and comfortable. Its hard
Thank you Jerry, Im trying hard to understand this video.....can you share examples of what “going outward “ with the narcissist means? Is it changing my behaviors toward them? Thank you
I found the outward/inward analogy difficult to understand. I would prefer to understand how we focus on ourselves and change ourselves to find the happiness/love we are looking forward. Instead of focusing on and trying to change others.
Finally get your family OUT OF YOU & be the true self you were never allowed to be 👇
Access my free training - jerrywise.ewebinar.com/webinar/free-training-10027
‘Road to Self’ Program: Join 10,000+ people who have transformed their lives! www.jerrywiserelationshipsystems.com/road-to-self
my own family scapegoated me until #1 brother came with me to my bank.. Saw me interact & said" CAROL, they Like you?" he was amazed& saw me- finally as a Sucess!
Oh this is beautiful! 🌷
The painful decision to go no contact is paying off for me now, as I'm able to continue to go inward in my healing. I see how the standing up for myself and placing a boundary was my first step.
This video is confirmation and help for me.
As always, you are a blessing with your knowledge and truth.
Always wise, realistic, and sound advice. We need this no matter what our age.
I am an ACOA. Thanks to you I know that and I know it’s real. I am 42, will be 43 this month. In January I went to a family funeral and broke down in front of an aunt and it was uncontrollable. I was NOT expecting that. The trigger: my alcoholic father was there. I was like Wow, this is real!
Good that you got some grief out, maybe some of it was from childhood?
@@iw9338 thank you for your comment
Thank You For Sharing
I Have Been In A Narcissistic Relationship
For Over 6 Yrs Im Currently Seeing A Therapist
Do To The Emotional Abuse I Suffered.
I Was Horribly Punished On And Off With The Narcissists
Silent Treatment Through Out Our 6 Yr Relationship.
I Struggle With Going No Contact It’s Very
Hurtful Being Abuse By A Narcissists
It Takes Yrs To Heal..
You mentioned writing a book. This would make a perfect chapter! Thank you for this detailed illustration of a client's internal work!
20:25 The inward and outward reversal is pure gold. Thanks for the resources at the end of your video. I enjoyed this immensely on this Sunday night.
I'm learning to mind my own business, healing core beliefs, which are lies.
Thank you for this paradigm shift
I'm glad it was helpful
Did you just recited my life story? Lol. That "box" sounded too familiar, triggered and kept there. Broke out 4 yrs ago, divorced my husband at the age of 60 after being married 30 years. Felt great. An instant relief actually.
However after I fell sick, my children turned against me, and I went to "pendulum" mode, could see narc tendencies (God Only Knows) and a lack of emphathy.
To recover from them (after attempts to make them see the truth failed), I decided a month or so ago, to just die (not physically)
...just sort of disappear in order to try and forget them.
Which is what they want anyway.
I love them both a lot but could not take the pain they caused me and refuse to be emotionally abused anymore.
Hope this will get me closer to the 90° mark and not push me off the edge God Knows!
Am 64 now, know I am better off in "solitary confinement" lol which was their punishment was if I objected to anything they said or did.
Covid 19's Social distancing / isolation worked out for me, as what I got, when "in contact" on their terms was more hurtful.
No love is better than fake love.
What also helped, is not referring to them as my "children".
They are 30 and 27 so adults...I refer to them by name, its not breaking relationship just distancing. It hurts less for now.
One day maybe things will be better between us, for now I have found ways to survive and heal.
Best wishes, you are not alone.
@@Pfsif Thank you. All words of comfort are appreciated :).
May God Ease the healing for all similar predicaments. Ameen.
I hope you will feel better and better... Best wishes for that!
@@annainari1222 Thank you xx. Have my down days, but hopefully won't relapse. On the mend with the Grace of God. My focus is totally on mastering a new language, it's slow cause I am 64 and was never good at languages, but something has clicked and am on a roll :)
@@RubinaMerchant All the best, you are on your way ! Take care of you...
Thanks
Hi Agineszka, I’m glad you find my videos helpful to your healing journey, thank you for your support!
@@jerrywiseYou are welcome! I really appreciate your informative videos. Currently in a psycho-dynamic therapy and using your work as an enhancement of my recovery process. Thank you!
Thank you!
You're welcome! ❤️
Wow that pendulum description fits me verbatim, thank you for this empowering paradigm shift
Forty Years.! Were there really fewer narcissists back then.? Did therapists recognize the condition to be as damaging as they do today?
Hey, not to poke holes or anything, but I believe the word you're looking for is 'titled' and not 'entitled'. I watch a lot of your content and I appreciate it a lot, just a little thing that I keep noticing. Thanks for the good work that you do!
Thanks for the tip!
How do you deal with the fact you're happier, and are on the journey to finding your authentic self, FINALLY and the minute you are in contact with your family everything becomes reversed?
I hear you... I experience the same and get very frustrated with myself. It's as if no time has passed and as if all the years of self discovery and personal freedom vanish gradually and continually to zero since I returned "home".
Wow I feel the same way. I know I'm happier without them. But I keep letting their abuse back in. It does not feel good to associate with them but it feels familiar and comfortable. Its hard
A few take Accountability. I am not a victim. I need to learn how to be emotional stabil
Thank you Jerry, Im trying hard to understand this video.....can you share examples of what “going outward “ with the narcissist means? Is it changing my behaviors toward them? Thank you
The betrayal bond book, ❤
Why I feel fake when ppl connect with me or I connect with them.
Do you have a video on self-differentiation?
I found the outward/inward analogy difficult to understand. I would prefer to understand how we focus on ourselves and change ourselves to find the happiness/love we are looking forward. Instead of focusing on and trying to change others.