Thank you, Athina. I tried to approach my mother about emotional abuse (once I realized what that was), but she didn't even want to recognize how she had hurt me and she said she didn't want to change. It was devastating feeling that I had to give up hope that she would ever change or be the mother I needed, but that also gave me the courage to let go. I'm still grieving the loss and I'm feeling it really hard, right now, which is why I sought another video on the subject. And yes, I'm still working on reparenting and addressing the food addiction and other addictive tendencies that I had taken on. And all the rest...I'm still working on that, too. It's a process. Great questions, by the way. They really get to the heart of how this kind of relationship can affect a person and how they show up, as an adult. Thank you for creating this. Blessings! - Claire
Emotionally vacant mother. Gawd I tried so hard to make her happy and recieved very little kindness. I always knew inside she musnt love me bc of the way she never hugged me, never looked at me with friendly eyes, rarely smiled at me, never encouraged me, never said I love you. She seemed to be thrilled and loved to be angry with me if I had a problem. So awful when I look back. The stopping hoping…so MAJOR…..occurred for me this week. It took 3 yrs of struggle and hurt, reliving the most recent transgressions, so painful, intermittently depressed, crying in my car, hoping and trying….then silence. Then I gave up. Just gave up hoping she might reply differently, less cruel. She is still cruel and when it hit me, the times when I have been the most sad and vulnerable, trying to talk to her, she was the most venomous to me. Always since childhood and Im middle aged. This use to be confusing. But This week. Its clear. She is a wounded woman herself who has never looked inside her self. She was whipping me with her tongue to maintain herself. I was just a tumor that bothered her.
Amazing words ''She is a wounded woman herself who has never looked inside her self. She was whipping me with her tongue to maintain herself. I was just a tumor that bothered her''. Many of my subscribers will relate to this!Thank you for sharing!
Thank You, It is a hell of a world where I find myself yearning to feel grief to inform me of my progress, but I do. Excuse me as I disassociate from this comment and run away to hide my shame. Thank You, genuinely.
Thank you Athena, this was an amazing video!! You are very clear and precise with your explanations and you make absolute sense when you say that one first has to accept that our mother was a narcissist. I thought I had done that but after I listened to what you had to say about answering the 5 questions about whether I've accepted who my mom is....I know I haven't gotten there yet. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and knowledge.....
Thanks for a very helpful and informative video. All of what you said resonates with me , especially my mother constantly trying to undermine my self confidence.
Thank you for this, very powerful. I have been stuck on cognitive awareness for some time but I find myself progressing. This will be a great roadmap for me.
Thank you I subscribed glad to find you ❤ A lot of making sense and I need to continue on the stage 5 of recovery, my mother RIP she died a year ago at old age , I get Mad now coming to understand and some family revealed more of her manipulations , back stabbings behind my back … so sad !
I think only after i started to learn about this topic regarding to my ex...i realized my mom is exactly this..this hurts but at least i set a boundary to talk only once a week..she said why am i doing this to her, asked me if she did something wrong.. i said this is my maditation.. never told her to this day why i did it cause its pointless ( thats what i heard ). 🙏🌈✨
Wow please can you share more about it? My dad is a narcissist and have been praying for him from time to time ever since I was born again back in 2017...!
My mum is 100% a narcissist. She has been a born again Christian since the 60s. She has been an avid church goer for decades and knows the bible inside out as well as back to front... she's 83 now and still as toxic as she was when I was growing up.
Is it the same when you are on the path of healing from a narcissistic father? I am guessing that a mother wound must hurt more due to the needs our mothers need to meet. In my case my father is a covert narcissist and my mother resembles a mild borderline/co-dependent type... Both of them were extremely detached as parents and treated me and my sister more like things rather than persons...
Hi Melina, the mother wound is always more painful than the father wound but these stages of healing could also help if you apply them to healing from a narcissistic father as well. I am sorry they were both so detached from you and your sister..
Why does it take years im suffering effects for years first goin thru pain of it den running from it living n survial mode n mow fully broken sometimrs i find it so hard to actually stand up
I only had an abuse relationship first with my mother her to me and den a partner same traits 30 years later never met what i should have met healthy loving normal i grieve daily theres so much loss n pain over her decisions to abuse me from age of 3
I became aware a few years ago that i may never have a child because of my own upbringing and damage. Its a weird feeling Also what am i supposed to do if i had wrong answers for almlst all of those questions? 😢
@@CourageCoaching Tysvm, i am honestly not feeling up to it, it disgusts me to be around her, just brings back all the lies and deception, but my sibs keep pushing me in another direction, telling me i'll perhaps regret it later.
Thank you, Athina. I tried to approach my mother about emotional abuse (once I realized what that was), but she didn't even want to recognize how she had hurt me and she said she didn't want to change. It was devastating feeling that I had to give up hope that she would ever change or be the mother I needed, but that also gave me the courage to let go. I'm still grieving the loss and I'm feeling it really hard, right now, which is why I sought another video on the subject. And yes, I'm still working on reparenting and addressing the food addiction and other addictive tendencies that I had taken on. And all the rest...I'm still working on that, too. It's a process. Great questions, by the way. They really get to the heart of how this kind of relationship can affect a person and how they show up, as an adult. Thank you for creating this. Blessings! - Claire
Its so humiliating to have a mother like this😢
Emotionally vacant mother. Gawd I tried so hard to make her happy and recieved very little kindness. I always knew inside she musnt love me bc of the way she never hugged me, never looked at me with friendly eyes, rarely smiled at me, never encouraged me, never said I love you. She seemed to be thrilled and loved to be angry with me if I had a problem. So awful when I look back. The stopping hoping…so MAJOR…..occurred for me this week. It took 3 yrs of struggle and hurt, reliving the most recent transgressions, so painful, intermittently depressed, crying in my car, hoping and trying….then silence. Then I gave up. Just gave up hoping she might reply differently, less cruel. She is still cruel and when it hit me, the times when I have been the most sad and vulnerable, trying to talk to her, she was the most venomous to me. Always since childhood and Im middle aged. This use to be confusing. But This week. Its clear. She is a wounded woman herself who has never looked inside her self. She was whipping me with her tongue to maintain herself. I was just a tumor that bothered her.
Amazing words ''She is a wounded woman herself who has never looked inside her self. She was whipping me with her tongue to maintain herself. I was just a tumor that bothered her''.
Many of my subscribers will relate to this!Thank you for sharing!
I always grieve having a narc "father" psychopath...No father at all would have been much better for me. Thank You!!:))!!
I'm listening and you are describing my mother
Thank You, It is a hell of a world where I find myself yearning to feel grief to inform me of my progress, but I do. Excuse me as I disassociate from this comment and run away to hide my shame. Thank You, genuinely.
thank you, great video! I would love to have some example on how to meet our own emotional needs. Maybe another video? :)
I’m further along in the healing process than I thought I was ❤ thank you for this video
Thank you Athena, this was an amazing video!! You are very clear and precise with your explanations and you make absolute sense when you say that one first has to accept that our mother was a narcissist. I thought I had done that but after I listened to what you had to say about answering the 5 questions about whether I've accepted who my mom is....I know I haven't gotten there yet. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and knowledge.....
Thank you for your comforting and truthful help on this deeply painful healing journey.
Thanks for a very helpful and informative video.
All of what you said resonates with me , especially my mother constantly trying to undermine my self confidence.
Thank you for this, very powerful. I have been stuck on cognitive awareness for some time but I find myself progressing. This will be a great roadmap for me.
Thank you I subscribed glad to find you ❤ A lot of making sense and I need to continue on the stage 5 of recovery, my mother RIP she died a year ago at old age , I get Mad now coming to understand and some family revealed more of her manipulations , back stabbings behind my back … so sad !
I think only after i started to learn about this topic regarding to my ex...i realized my mom is exactly this..this hurts but at least i set a boundary to talk only once a week..she said why am i doing this to her, asked me if she did something wrong.. i said this is my maditation.. never told her to this day why i did it cause its pointless ( thats what i heard ). 🙏🌈✨
My mother passed away a year ago. I struggle with step one more than ever now. I keep self gas lightening myself.
Sending you strength in navigating this more successfully. Self-compassion helps!
Ruminations will eventually wane. Knowledge is power, application of knowledge is wisdom. I thank you for sharing. I'm in that very same"boat".
My mum changed!!!
She’s a born again believer in Jesus Christ now!
Halleluyah
No more demon oppression 🙌❤️🙏
Wow please can you share more about it? My dad is a narcissist and have been praying for him from time to time ever since I was born again back in 2017...!
I would search "covert religious narcissist" before jumping for joy!
My mum is 100% a narcissist. She has been a born again Christian since the 60s. She has been an avid church goer for decades and knows the bible inside out as well as back to front... she's 83 now and still as toxic as she was when I was growing up.
Love You, Beauty!!:))!! Thank You!!👍💐😊💗🍀🌈⚓!!✨
You are so welcome!
Im in stage 3 but I realize I don’t want a relationship with her at all
Is it the same when you are on the path of healing from a narcissistic father? I am guessing that a mother wound must hurt more due to the needs our mothers need to meet. In my case my father is a covert narcissist and my mother resembles a mild borderline/co-dependent type... Both of them were extremely detached as parents and treated me and my sister more like things rather than persons...
Hi Melina, the mother wound is always more painful than the father wound but these stages of healing could also help if you apply them to healing from a narcissistic father as well. I am sorry they were both so detached from you and your sister..
Why does it take years im suffering effects for years first goin thru pain of it den running from it living n survial mode n mow fully broken sometimrs i find it so hard to actually stand up
I only had an abuse relationship first with my mother her to me and den a partner same traits 30 years later never met what i should have met healthy loving normal i grieve daily theres so much loss n pain over her decisions to abuse me from age of 3
I am so sorry for your pain! Thank you for sharing! Hang in there!
I became aware a few years ago that i may never have a child because of my own upbringing and damage. Its a weird feeling
Also what am i supposed to do if i had wrong answers for almlst all of those questions? 😢
Just keep moving forward and educate yourself about healing! You will get there!
❤
how to proceed on mother's day?
This is completely up to you. If you aren't feeling it that is okay.
@@CourageCoaching Tysvm, i am honestly not feeling up to it, it disgusts me to be around her, just brings back all the lies and deception, but my sibs keep pushing me in another direction, telling me i'll perhaps regret it later.
@@heidilovesliberty8088 dont you just dread picking out the card? All those mushy lies. You can send flowers with no card. Thats what I did for years.