The Worst Houses In The World
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- Опубліковано 15 лют 2021
- Why do rich people love murder rooms?
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These all look like modded Sims houses and I refuse to believe they exist outside of a video game.
i always say modern houses just look like if someone went into the sims and just started placing walls randomly
the architects typed motherlode and built their first house
they look like the preset houses in the sims freeplay
Yes! Especially the green one, which us probably why i lowkey liked it lmao. I go crazy with obnoxious patterns and themes 🤣
@@beblue3119 I played the Sims free play for like four years so you just brought a wave of nostalgia an ugly house designs into my mind and thank you for that
I have not laughed this hard at a UA-cam video since at least yesterday.
Wow! MDJ is Premium™! (ofc, we already knew that 😎 🥕)
Holy crow, you watch Jarvis too?
🤗
@@JarvisJohnsonGOLD hi
MDJ!!! I love your content, it’s great to see you here :)
“I know things about sports. F*ck, damn y’all, catch me winning the heisman trophy and sh*t. F*ck, welcome to ESPN, sh*t, f*ck” -Jarvis, today
I have never seen so much swear words in one sentence except when markiplier rages over a game. I'm impressed!
@@you_tubeslonelyheartsclubband You don't live in Massachusetts, do you? 🤣
@@you_tubeslonelyheartsclubband you have not met my family or my boyfriend and his family
While I'm fairly "modest" with curse words unless angry, my boyfriend is basically:
Me- "babe stop cussing there's a child near me"
Him- "oh f*ck, sorry- wait sh*t- DAMMIT I'M SORRY I DON'T MEAN TO F*CKING SWEAR"
@@threecheeseburrito I mean from where I'm from, People drop F-bombs left and right in my cafeteria!
@@gabriellevalentine2057 I mean from where I'm from, People drop F-bombs left and right in my cafeteria! (yes I did copy-paste that from my other comment)
the football house is actually under a terrible curse that turns any decoration you put in it to instantly turn into Michigan football merchandise. that's why the house is at a discount
I can totally see my brother doing something like that except with the Denver Broncos.
A new SCP has dropped!
New scp lore!!
as a michigander i can confirm it was witchcraft
I love how Jarvis' biggest problem with the football house is the inadequate number of bathrooms 💀
Where there is football there is beer - and a need for a bathroom
@@BrickTsar truuuuuuue 😂
Inadequate number of bathrooms is a nightmare!
Every time, every single time he goes “the premium channel, which is free. *it is free.*” I feel like he’s lying... then he calls me a golden baby and everything’s cool again.
I see you are a person of culture. Memento Mori my friend.
The clock is ticking.
Memento mori(also hi again @FrecklesAndFries)!
@@you_tubeslonelyheartsclubband ah dude! Wait I remember your name but what video was it? Was it another Jarvis Video or was it somewhere else?
@@frecklesandfries9209 i don't remember believe it or not.
As someone who’s taken a geology 101 course, houses built on cliffs/right over water make me very anxious. Erosion is a serious issue dude!
Rich people care more about the raw value of the house than building it to last more than 30 years.
I don't even know how I learned of it and it's just. wow yikes you gon die
@@askinredroads5132 where do you live? Asking for a friend :D
there was a bible story about this
Jarvis: One bathroom isn't enough
Me growing up in a family of 10 with one and a half bathroom: Hmm. Interesting.
Must have been fun....
"Get out of my way!"
"You are blocking the mirror!"
"Where is my toothbrush?"
"Can someone pass me the towel?"
"Where is my toothbrush? Did someone use it?"
"YOU ALL GET OUT OF THE BATHROOM NOW, I NEED TO PEE"
Same, but we had 2 full bathrooms at least, Praise the Lord 🤣
ig your dad’s pullout game was weak
damn i had 3, the 3rd one was pretty much only used by my uncle tho
4 rooms, 3 bathrooms and 8 people 😎🔫
@@stepbro4028 we had 4 rooms, 10 people, and 2 bathrooms 😂😅
"And this room is a murder room... Or it could be a nursery."
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
i see we have a john mulaney fan
And this is the GarageKitchenPatioLaundryRoom......or maybe a nursery.... 😏
I just thought it was some room for like tornadoes or something. I forgot what they’re called.
@@_deademuse_4776 bunker??
“the michigan stays on during sex” I HOLLERED
they can be disappointed twice over!! We suck
As a Michigander, I laughed too hard
@@wamwamwam just holler
I can’t imagine being hired to sell a pretty standard looking home only to walk inside and realize it’s a goddamn UOM shrine
Jarvis: “It’s a free country, you can do whatever you want with your house.”
*HOA enters chat*
When “go to your room!” becomes “go to jail! *g o s t r a i g h t t o j a i l* “
do not pass go do not collect $200
Or maybe someone took "house arrest" too literally.
I can't help but imagine whoever lived in that Michigan football house gave joker speeches while staring at all his memorabilia every time they lost a game.
this is the perfect description. i burst out laughing at this
The only position allowed in that house is michiganary
Imagine being the relative who has another favorite team who happens to be the rival of the Michigan team and you come over for thanksgiving dinner...
@@haileyjohnson8154 How dare you parade in The OHIO State hat in my fucking house!?
I laughed a lot. But nothing fucked me up quite like “Oh it’s green.”
Feel free to hate me but I low-key like the green house. It's a perfect time capsule of tacky 70s houses. I wouldn't personally want to live there but I think it's an interesting house.
I'm scared of murder house
Edit: now football house came up and suddenly murder house doesn't feel so weird anymore
Wait until Green House
@@BaronBytes
**throws up violently**
I think it was just a sex dungeon
@@Shizzy5321 I dunno that either of them were - the first one was an ideal setup for growing weed, the second appeared to be outside/exposed which is super impractical. I have no idea what the second one was actually for, though. Um...really big dogs?
I gotta admit I do blush every time he calls us 'premium'. Like I'm finally getting the recognition I deserve.
same
Lik dis? 😳
How were you not pinned?
Aww, that's kinda cute!
No one ruin the 299th like
I heard "Jack" the first 3 times you talked about Shaq, and I wasn't even fased by it I was just "yeah let's go see Jack's house, whoever he is"
me too. for some reason my mind went to jack dorsey
I heard Shaq but still didn't get it. Feels like one of those American references I'm never going to get.
@@AlexaFaie he’s just a very famous guy who happens to be 7’1”
8:10 in the sims when you don't feel like building walls so u just put all the shit in one giant room
I love how commentary UA-cam channels started out trying to make sure they didn't post the same type of videos in the same time period and now every channel is like "yeah I saw my friend post this so now I'm posting the same thing because its MORE FUN FOR US"
all the better for us viewers right?
Between the murder room or jail cell house I'm stuck...
In the murder room please hel-
Oh no....
Too late, I guess :D
i told you to stop commenting ffs where did you even get that phone
@@schnuffelschnuffel141 who?
@@explodingbutters9595 the og commenter
"3 Bedroom 1 bath?... That's a lot of people to be sharing a bathroom." My family of 11 sharing one bathroom like, oh, you right, you right.
Jarvis being so proud of himself for that Framingham joke made me crack up.
When Jarvis adjusted his glasses, I wholeheartedly expected an anime glint.
I was reading this comment then I looked up at the video and RIGHT THEN, he adjusted his glasses!!
@@stellataylor7436 Me too!
I want to see Drew Gooden, Danny Gonzalez, Scott Cramer, and Jarvis all get together for a grand super commentary someday 😄
also kurtis conner and d'angelo wallace-
@@emmaflint9736 -
facts
Yeah how could you forget Kurtis and d’angelo 😭
@@emmaflint9736 you forgot Cody Ko
Plot Twist: These are all houses Jim Pickens used to live in.
Explains the murder rooms...
finally found a kev viewer outside a kev related vid
@@badlypronouncednamehouston46 The Jim Pickens cult is spreading. Good
Wasn’t expecting this reference here ngl
More like Bore Ragnarok
Three bedroom one bath that’s a lot of people to be sharing a bathroom
Me:Is my home a joke to you Jarvis.
Yeah that's pretty normal in the UK. You might find some 3 beds with a tiny under stairs toilet room too, or some where they had a little extension to put an ensuite in for the master bedroom but other than that its really common for older houses in particular to only have the one bathroom until you get to 4 or 5 bedrooms.
I basically live on U of M campus, I've seen some "interesting" fans but Jesus dude. That house gives me anxiety, my favorite color is yellow but that can't be healthy to live in.
My favourite colors used to be yellow and blue and I still would've never moved into that mess.
The shade of yellow is kinda ugly tbh
Here's an idea: Buy some U of M merch, go to the house, put in an offer while talking about how much you love U of M (do plenty of research so you sound convincing), sign all the necessary papers, and as soon as the previous owners leave, buy some Not A Flamethrowers for you and your friends. Or paint, whichever is more your groove.
That's how most houses look in Michigan...
Go blue! 😬🚩
@@NorthernGreenEyes I've never been to those houses. But I see them all the time, or the MI State ones. 😬
I genuinely want to know how someone convinced some poor contractor to build a literal JAIL
Emphasis on “convince”.
@@turner15 *FORCED
@@caseys2698 hi i was going to comment here 1 year ago but i was kidnapped in The Murder Room
also they put the contractor in The Murder Room to make them build the nail
These houses are the randomized Sims characters of houses
"Beige and green, like chocolate and peanut butter."
Yeah that makes sense. Wait wh-
Two things which go together well is what he was trying to get at I think. 🙂
Imagine buying the green house as red green colorblind, then it’s bearable
Haha maybe that’s what happened when they were decorating
It would all be brown lol
@@imagoat273 is that how that works? lol
@@abracadanielle9647 , that is not how it works
@@janeeyre1990 it is lol, everything is an undersaturated muddy reddish green
Not jarvis being clueless about the concept of sex dungeons
I mean yeah sure but also wtf who would go for a sex dungeon in light mode?
@@beingsodone Our Dear Leader Jim Pickens!
@@belurso5179 was that a callmekevin joke lol
@@beingsodone yeah a sex dungeon with white walls is weird af but also you wouldn’t want your murder room to have white walls so like wtf is it for
@@belurso5179 praise the dear leader
5:14
"No no, I wanted to PURCHASE a jail cell, not be put in one."
9:26 “ive seen this comforter for sale before”
me laying in my bed underneeth that comforter: 👁👄👁
i’m only 2 minutes in but i already want this to be a series 😭
Jarvis: that’s a lot of people to be sharing a bathroom
Me who shared a single bathroom with five other people up until this year: 😐
I felt that in my soul
I took that personally 😐
Big family? Just move out of mom and dad’s?
SAM i can’t tell if that’s sarcasm or not lol. Cuz it’s not like everyone has that option
I've never lived in a house with more than one bathroom apart from a few years with an outdoor toilet (just toilet no shower or anything) as a kid. From a family of five, moved into a sharehouse with 4 other flatmates when I left, and have only had at least 2 other flatmates for the vast majority of time since then.
The fact that Jarvis was so amazed by that house in Ontario shows he's clearly never gone mansion window-shopping and frankly he's missing out.
The most I’ve ever heard Jarvis cuss, when he baffled himself with his own sports knowledge
Midwest houses built in the 50s were notorious for having one bathroom. When we were looking for places, finding 2 baths in our budget was tricky.
Agree, we're technically Midwest although I say we're more South, where I live that is, and this is the first time I've lived in a house with three bathrooms, one being a half bath because it's the size of a broom closet and has no shower, but omg it's so amazing I feel so happy, this is the fanciest house I've had in a long time, other than the loft house for like a year, and that's partially cause this house has STAIRS and a tiny coraline door to an upstairs space. (Not kidding, I just realized that there really is an out of place thing in every house that gives horror movie vibes) Family is making it taller so it's easier to traverse, but it's the game room for us upstairs folk (aka my dad and I, the ones with the not-as-bad-knees)
Here in Pittsburgh you usually get a regular bathroom and then just a random toilet in the basement.
@@sorenlundi141 oh no
In my experience, "the Michigan stays on during sex" is unfortunately accurate when it comes to UMich fans 💀
????
Me building a sims house: 8:30
I'm obsessed with the green interior, I want someone to film a surrealist movie in there
Wes Anderson would do great things with it
We are the premium viewers
Not a cult, premium viewers.
I don't know what it is about this channel... I know "Gold" is just a word, but whenever I get here I feel instantly more premium.
9:42 "That's a straight up crack hangout" is sending me
“When u eat where u park”
“Im from Framingham and I know where this is”
“This looks like a Gucci add”
Are all my favorite comments ordered chronologically
And ofc, Zillow herself “who approved some of these carpet styles lol”
"I've captured some of your water and made it hot" - Jarvis Johnson 2021
We need to appreciate how Jarvis doesn’t make us pay for all this premium content 😌
Yeah, but you do need to be premium to watch this channel, I feel bad for all those non premium viewers.
@@SorowFame Me too
If you aren't paying, you are the product. (The premium product)
@@cheeto.burrito that's the standard for those filthy non-premium products like FACEBOOK!!! So gross!!!! Here at Jarvis Johnson! Gold (the only premium youtube channel to ever exist) we don't have to pay for the treatment we would normally have to pay for
This is so delightful 😆
I've spent the majority of my life sharing a bathroom with four other people, that's just the poor with a big family life
Hey, you should collaborate with Jarvis Johnson
OMG YESSS
That would be so cool 😎
Great guy great guy lol
Don't mind me, just waiting for somebody to not get the joke...))
YES
This reminds me of when Contrapoints pointed out the parallels between modern day McMansions and those Victiorian suburban houses that were also a huge fad and since just became a setting for horror stories. Rich people have always loved them some murder rooms.
For those wondering about the car in the room. It is a thing for certain houses where they get frequent tornados, blizzards, or hurricanes, where they will have car access into the house to protect it from the weather when there is no garage available.
Jarvis’s laugh when he finally gets to the slide that’s the shocking part of the house cracks me up every time
I actually love the beige house with the mod 60’s green interior. It gives me Edward scissor hand vibes. I’d definitely paint the outside a different color tho.
Please, go to therapy
don't know why someone told you to go to therapy over this comment, but I wholeheartedly agree with you. Green is my absolute favorite color and the interior of that house made me so delighted. I wish I could live there tbh. People need to embrace weird, funky, kitschy interior design. Honestly, people of the 60s and 70s had the right idea with fun bright carpet, bathtub, and sink colors. It makes me sad to know that nowadays, those historic designs/pieces are being "renovated" away.
@@seisage yes!! I agree 100%
Pepto Bismol Pink. That is the color the outside should be. No I will not be taking questions at this time.
Might be that they can't paint the outside because of HOA rules or a landlord or something
“It also comes with a jail!”- Jarvis Johnson 2021
I would love to live in that green house if it came with the furniture. The wallpaper is so insane and I'm here for it
At first, I thought the room hidden by the bookshelf was a panic room, but now you've given it an even more urgent meaning. 😭💀
conspiracy theory: Jarvis is building a pokemon card house with a murder room and 1 bathroom
On the sea ofc
Don't forget the jail cell
@@caleblastname6969 with a hot tub that has a sign screw you ocean
He looked at these houses for inspiration and now he’s making this video so it doesn’t seem suspicious.
Lol you had the perfect opportunity to make a "Michigan-ary style" sex joke 😂😂😂
5:45 I feel the same. Yet here I am, three bedrooms, 5 people, one bathroom that's tiny.
that michigan house i would never live in, even as a fan
now the murder room
Now that's a room I could die in!
Why does Jarvis always sound like he came up with something random and just started filming?
Isn't this what all Jarvis' videos are about?
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what happened
@@GummyDinosaursify I’m starting to think so too
Disclaimer: This is in no way making fun of him or anything. I actually like the fact that it seems genuine and somewhat unplanned.
@@hannahmilby4870 Yes! My comment was also meant in that way.
That first house reminds me of Aunt Josephine’s house from A Series of Unfortunate Events.
I was about to comment that lol
Same lol!
a series of unfortunate events?
what happened to her i hope shes ok
@@oneofthoseyoutubeusers lol sorry idk if you were joking but she gets eaten by leeches :(
I would like to buy Shaq’s Shack. I heard he’s selling it to fund his restaurant: “Shaq’s Shake Shack”
As someone who works in optics, I deeply appreciate your anti reflective coating!! Nice to see your eyes 😂
can't tell you how many times i've gone to ikea looking for a jail but every time they're just like "nah we got the HAUGA tho"
this deserves more likes
Honestly, I want a secret room in my house just to use as a panic/safe room rather than a murder room 😅
Hahahahahaha! 😂🤣😃
So a don't-get-murdered room?
An anti-murder room?
I have always wanted that too! GOALS.
What do you do in a panic room though ? Do you just ... panic ??
@@anuwilson9039 It’s not really literal, it’s like for an emergency such as a break or tornado and stuff like that. So it has bedding and non perishable food so you can survive for a while or protect yourself
@@wtfislife7961 Oh... fuck I guess I don't have brain cells anymore :(
Me, a homeowner, 3 bdrm, 1 bath.
Jarvis: Get yourself a second bath!
somebody: JAIL
this house: funny you mention that
How does one have a jail cell implemented in their house and why is there a bigass window right there? This looks like something I'd build in the Sims 4.
as someone who lives with someone from Michigan, he is exactly like that house 😃 they deadass make it a personality trait I-
marichat?
As someone from michigan *I’m a michigan state fan go green*
@@doyoulikemyhat1404 as another person from michigan, agreed, Go Green
The green and beige house is VERY 70's. That was really in at the time. My aunt had an all seafoam green bedroom. I can remember going in there as a child and the light through the green curtains filtering in on the green carpet and bed... It was very ethereal. LOL. I honestly thought those memories were a dream, but my dad later confirmed that it was real... this house just brought all of that back.
That bookshelf-hidden room is 100% where someone who's now serving a life sentence held a kidnapped teenage girl prisoner for years.
As a Michigander I 100% know people who have the kind of personality to make their whole house football themed.
"I've seen that comforter for sale before"
Me: *looks at my bed* and apparently I was the person who bought said comforter
oh shit me too!!
When I was looking for an apartment, there was one place with a toilet in the middle of the living room. I guess for bathroom emergencies? Probably my weirdest find.
The way Jarvis didn’t like the gorgeous green house but he liked that hideous kitchen with the red walls 💀
The legend has a consistent upload schedule. The next thing is to build that Pokémon card house
"Maybe that's why it's so cheap"
If you think 600,000$ is cheap than I'm desperately poor.
comparatively!
it was just the only one that wasn 't like 3 million dollars was all i was trying to say
Jarvis is from California though, which is a whole other world when it comes to real estate. There was a house in San Jose that burned down and the burned-out husk sold for $900,000, in cash, after being on the market for a week.
@@kimmc8397 Oh dang. Yeah well Oklahoma here is the 2nd cheapest real estate in the US, houses typically cost around 100,000, and usually less.
@@Willybean08 Guess it's time to move to Oklahoma. I'm from Washington, and the only time I've ever seen a house go for less than 250,000 is if it's in the middle of nowhere and also doesn't have the hookups for toilets (true story).
10:44 Pistachio House
4:16 it looks like they ordered a light and the chain thingie was too long so they just needed to make it work so they hung it up weirdly
I used to be kind of obsessed with the idea of hh holmse's murder castle as a kid (not really the murdering aspect but the secret passage ways and shit) and seeing these houses with hidden rooms reminds me of that. I honestly really like quirky houses and enjoyed all of them except for the green house. wtf.
H...have you never seen a panic room? That's what the "murder room" is
If I wasn't already panicked that room would make me panic.
It's for growing pot
my house as a kid was low key like the second house- basement laundry room with graffiti walls and secret little room, tons of crawl spaces and two attics
“I know things about sports!”...My new go-to phrase whenever I get a sports question right on Jeopardy😄
@09:47 So... No one is going to mention how that house is basically a pistachio?
"Aerial shots that are like...this is what it would look like if u were a bird!"-My favorite line by Jarvis yet
every family house needs a secret murder room 😌✨
These are just Sims houses that seeped into our reality.
(Also McMansion Hell is one of my favourite places for horrifying home design)
“Is this a murder room?”
*yes*
10:17 - Gosh this feels like a house you'd be inside in a dream
The green interior house was so gorgeous what a dream. The boring exterior makes it seem like a geode. plain stone and then you open it and see smth wonderful
Every time I've watched this video I've started to fall asleep at my desk, and I've just now realized that it's the abnormal blissfulness and quiet of the audio, of just...uninterrupted Jarvis Voice triggering my ASMR. It's like getting your brain massaged.
what about the smartest houses
Smart house floor absorbers
Please make another one of these, it was unironically so good to watch.
2:08 Nobody:
"A Series of Unfortunate Events" fans: * *Aunt Josephine flash backs* *
Murder room is an old panic room, its for when there is an intruder and doubles as emergency storm shelters.