Too Much time I've wasted with ridiculous imaginations and overthinking every single thing that comes out of my partners mouth. I'm tired, sick, and it's ruining my current relationship.
Whenever I get jealous, I tell myself that everyone on this Earth is flawed, and that no one is perfect. And I tell myself that we all have brains that allow us to think and do brilliant things, and hearts that allow us to feel, and love others.
Yea..I’m here bc I want to be #1 in class bc I always was until I moved to this new school, a girl who’s like me, what I’ve heard from my new friend was that the girl looks like me (she’s online but I’m in school), she’s the same ethnicity, our names are the same but it’s spelled one letter differently, and she’s nice, we have 2 classes together, I’m better in one of them but whenever I win a game, our names are pronounced the same so my teacher says my name (Ik it’s me bc I see I’m #1 on my screen)but most people assume it’s the other girl bc they were with her last year. And she’s better in history so she always wins and my teacher says: Kaila with an i won!! She’s a better version of me
It totally kills me! I’m so irrational and yet I believe it’s totally true. My partner is a beautiful man and women adore him. I’m not imagining it it’s a fact! I just don’t know how to turn this off 😢
you probably dont give a shit but if you guys are stoned like me atm you can stream all the latest movies on instaflixxer. Been watching with my brother recently xD
With social media we are constantly battling jealousy. It is worse than before the internet. The cheating is unbelievably easy too. I'm fed up with it.
I feel jealous whenever someone got what I want, when I'm doing my best and didn't got it at all, and someone there getting it without any efforts at all, it makes me very irritated and hurt.
I'm mentally exhausted from my constant jealousy. My husband is not perfect, but he tries to be the best person he can. I want to implement these tips for my sanity and to hopefully turn my imagination into good things. Thanks for the advice, I really to hear this.
I have a really weird case of jealousy. I got jealous becoz this one guy apparently was attracted to this girl and I felt so jealous about it even though I don't really have any feelings for that guy. I keep thinking about that scene everyday and think that I can't live my life happily. Whenever I think I am not actually jealous, my brain is telling me that I am. I am tired of feeling this way
I think you are jealous of the adoration/worshipping because you want yourself more of that or feel a lack of it. Remember that you are yourself enough and dont need anybody to make you feel better.
I tend to get jealous with my best friend. I absolutely love spending time with them and want them happy. I get jealous only with guy friends they hang out with, mainly because I feel like they're gonna replace me with them because I'm not good enough.
@Mellø4399 glad to know Im not the only one. I rarely feel like this anymore, part of it being that me and them don't talk anymore and drifted. And I also got more self confidence and try to live day by day rather than just worrying about the future too much
@Mellø4399 yes yes. It does. I just realized I hv a pattern. I used to feel jealous when my mom gv attention to my siblings. And then I did the same with my friends. If they paid attention to another friend I felt jealous and hurt, left out. And today when my sister dumped her idea of going shopping with me and went with her husband I could feel those jealous pangs again. Is there any solution to this issue.
The Green-eyed Monster has a bite... "Jealousy eats the body and anger burns the liver. Refrain from these two as you would avoid a lion." ~ Baha'u'llah, Baha'i Faith
thank you…after seeing your video on tips for jealousy i felt so understood. i have the most loyal and loving partner in the world but due to imagination that every second tells me he’s cheating, this and that my relationship almost ended and now i need to do everything to work on myself. it’s very hard, but it’s so comforting to see advice so tailored for me. especially when you said once you worked with people who couldn’t even watch movie with their partner in case someone attractive appears in it.. i wish you did online therapy because i gave up on therapy as no one could ever understand this. thanks so much 💞
Thank you. Feeling it tonight, have a long term disability and am broke, my school mates are all wildly rich and have fabulous lives. Walks help. I was bullied by someone who became super famous, so I see their face all over the place and it creeps me out.
I love #3. And as you image the one you love innocently chatting with, or going to a dinner with an oppisite sex friend, Image the joy that the person you love is feeling, and be happy for the joy in their life. Their joy shouldn't pain you, it can bring you joy. The green eyed monster steals and lies
I really need this video, I don't get easily jealous but rn I got insecure about this girl, everyone think shes beautiful and she seemed perfect, it doesnt really matter to me long ago but now it got in my head, I always compare myself to her, I want to stop it, I know I am beautiful and amazing.
U must not get jealous because god does not see the beauty of the face he likes the one who has a beautiful heart and soul and they will be always blessed
My issue is.. I used to be SO open with my exes until one relationship in which I never ever felt so empty before as I did with that man. I used to say to my exes check out that woman and we'd laugh together. Ffs to my failed relationship from 5 years ago, he was nice in the beginning, I rushed as I was 22 and then he stopped saying nice thing altogether. It was extremely rare and he was dry and blunt, but he'd have so much passion talking about other women's physical appearance, saying JLo is so nice she looked like this on the red carpet, then he'd stare too much at women on the street, at work, then he'd say that's just what men do. I became incredibly jealous of any good looking woman passing by me, online, etc. It stuck with me even 4 years later. I cry when I heated a guy I dated telling me he feels attracted only for 2 seconds if he sees a good looking woman in his visual area. I ended things (he didn't react too well anyway and was invalidating me so I did the right thing), but it kills me knowing that the only thing that helps me is hearing these words: I am never interested in any other woman, you're the most beautiful in my eyes (I know I'm not in the real world, because there's no such thing, but I'm always told how beautiful I am by everyone), no one is like you, you're special and physical appearance is so boring - like one of my exes used to say to me, a recent one. He turned out to be abusive but his reassuring words regarding this have helped me tremendously. Hearing 'get over yourself, is normal, I'm a man' is triggering to me, it makes me cry and hurts me so badly. I don't know how I'm going to date ever again.. I don't even know if that ex of mine meant what he said about me, since he turned out to be sadistic and lie, but hearing those words did help me..
in this video i really liked how you defined jealousy as a miss-use of imagination.i never thought of it in this way i just thought it was a desire of the human nature derived from one's mind to make more fortune or be in the position of second party.
"Misused imagination".. ❤️ its helped me to realize that if the experience seems historical, to seek and heal that pain.. I really value that what we're learning and experiencing through practice is: we can heal our minds with healthy and beautiful imaginations also.. See, a lot of trauma can't necessarily be reconciled yet.. the Brain/ Mind is Magnificent... and using the same medium, our imagination, we can literally heal our brains, heal our bodies, heal our stories.. 💜 carry on!
Thank you I needed to figure out my suspicions. You were to the point, recent divorce. I now know I fought for her, not guilt ridden. 635 min. Video, you condensed it perfectly, like we were having a direct conversation.
I was beyond confident for the first 5 months in my relationship until I saw messages that my boyfriend sent to few girls. Offering sex, of course. And now I struggle so much. He was insecure initially and I was very hard on him and I tried to forget this moment, but the monster is now awake. I wish to deal with my insecurities and start believing in him again. Initially I was really very trustful because I felt loved, but.....
oh man this is so difficult, I get it under control and boom the thoughts come right back.. it's going to take some , i sure hope I can squash them for good
My envy is not materialistic. Its that someone sought out pity for the doubt they experienced while living in a bubble of wealth, safety and security that I was denied at that age. While she is being surrounded with praise for things that came easy to her and she didn't earn because she dropped out of the right womb. But I am told to shut up and not tolerated for sharing my experiences that were difficult to live through and I feel need to be heard. My character is the outline of the wicked witch, where she would be the princess.
Hi Mark, I really like your work. Your model of jealousy as a misuse of imagination is quite astute, and I can see how the same idea can be useful for people with anxiety, as they misuse their imaginations to predict future disasters. Well done.
Ive been in love with my best friend since i met her, the thing is she's asexual and aromantic. We've talked about my feelings for her in the past, and sadly those feelings arent mutual. Im wildly insecure and anxious about myself, and i constantly feel she's going to replace me for another person. She became friends with another girl and i suffer everytime i think about it. I suffer so much but i know my jealousy is unjustified and just a distortion of my doom-pattern-seeking brain, as i've been replaced in the past numerous times. This helps a lot, specially on differentiate between the past and the present. Thank you
This is the only thing that I am trying to work on and some days are so hard,but there was a few helpful tips in this video that I will take with me and use them👍
I’m so glad to see that this video has more views than a lot of the videos on the same topic posted by young, attractive females. It gives me hope I’m the collective eq of the enm community
Its difficult when evaluating the past. The pattern of changes and the actions associated may helps towards increasing the imagination level. I thought I hate jealousy but now it is silently creeping in with the support of social media.
I was looking for something on envy. Being overwhelmed with envy of others. Have you something on envy? Thanks for your very welcome and helpful teachings.
I can’t seem to stop being jealous with one of my friends because I think one day she’s just gonna choose other people over me because she has before in the past choose two of my friends over me
my best friend has this other best friend and whenever they meet I feel really bad, but it's kind of selfish cause I also have another best friend but she lives in another country, so idk how to stop feeling this way, I really wanna be happy for her but I can't
@@retratomujer u must think that nature and god are your best friend because nature replies tp your felings even though i have friends but my best best friends are nature and god they support u in all way
I’ve been really struggling with this and there has been some situations that happened in my 25 years with my husband that caused me to be extremely insecure and have trust issues. And the past couple of years it’s gotten very bad, I’ve seen therapist and completed TMS treatment but still struggle with delusional jealousy. This is ruining my marriage, my life, and making myself look like a fool. I don’t know what else to do. Everyone around me has given up so I’m basically on my own.
I have a group of friends, I feel replaced by this 1 girl. Everybody talks when she is there, when she leaves the call everyone talks about it. When I leave, no one even cares or notices. She can send a message ans everyone writes back, but me? They only respond 1 word, like cool, oof or dont respond until someone switches the subject.
@@Shri-b3v Everyone I know ignores me, my friends from clubs like talking to my sister and ignoring me, my family likes my sisters more than me, my friends always ignore me. When someone is bullying me, my "best friend" just watches me suffer quietly.
@@fairymavis1 if u feel like that then u have to think that god nature and your angels are your best friend.....if someone bullies you they will suffer one or one day they wont get good place in heaven god decides it that heaven or hell even i do think that my best friends are nature god and angels even though i have friends. Nature....gives us oxygen and saved our life it even responds to our feelings
I don't know what others say....but hey it's perfectly fine what you are feeling....I read other replies....about God and angels and whatsoever....but I think you deserve the love care and attention you need....also love yourself... loving yourself is very important......if someone bullies you stand up for yourself and maybe be a person who also stand up for others.....be brave enough to point out to your friends that you feel left out.....may be they are doing it without even realising.... honestly I was stuck in similar situation for very long time.....I felt inferior but then I put some distance between myself and others.....and found that I was actually perfectly fine.... they just seem to careless about me....and maybe the new person you are jelous of can become your friend too.....
I've been a best friend with my crush for a long time until one day, she met one guy and then becomes closer to her in just one day. meanwhile, I, who been best friend with her for a long time never got that close. I don't know if she doesn't like me or not. Watching them on a date bad English lol
Being relaxed with your partner going out whilst having a hot bath (while he’s out with his friends having a hot girl trying to hit on him cause he’s gorgeous) - my mind is my worst enemy and I just don’t know how to undo this 😢
okay babes, first you have to know that your partner choose you. he choose you and he is continuing to choose you. there will be many “hot girls” but you are one too. get that in ur head, you ARE HIS HOT GIRL, not them. you can undo this by not feeding into ur thoughts. it will take time, but the brain is such a power tool. use it for good. next time your partner goes out, say “i hope he’s having a good time!” and “he will never feed into the hot girls around him, because I AM his hot girl”. once you convince yourself that, it’s over for you babes. i’m trying to get rid of my jealousy too! my advice also is try to find the root of your jealousy, and then untangle it like it’s a knot in your hair!
@@souls9988 Thankyou girl - everything you said is so true! I just find it sooo are sometimes to trust any man let alone my partner. I guess I’ve seen so many occasions where men have awesome girlfriends/ wives and they’ve been caught cheating. So I think, geez if they are doing that to their lovely wives and girlfriends, what chance do I stand? You are right though I need to find out why I get jealous xx Thankyou again xox
Today I was jealous that the girl I like was talking to someone else even tho they're not even close to the same age nor would they even date eachother ever. I know it's because I'm insecure and feel like I don't have the communication skills that others have but it's hard to get out of the negative rumination
I have this really dumb jealously thing. I play a game called elder scrolls online. I met this person that I think we just clicked we got along right away we talk to each other every day and keep in mind we have no sexual attraction towards each other bc she's married and I have no interest in a relationship but I get so jealous when I see her getting along with someone else so well I'm constantly checking Discord just to see if she's online and talking to someone else. I need help with this desperately
I know my wife wouldnt do me wrong or step out on our relationship yet i still have the constant mental battle daily to not get jelous over stupid things! For example if she says shes going out with friends, my mind will instantly start making up a whole story of how its going to go! As much as i know deep down its not real, i still cannot control the jelous beast and its frustrating, draining for us both and unnecessary! I deeply want to change!
@@JanelleFraser you should make some videos about retrospective jealousy OCD and give girls perspective about how they feel about it !! I am subscribing to your channel
This is my problem. If i stop doing nothing for 1 minute the imagination kicks in like a drugg and i start to create all this scenarios. I know is a problem i agree i have this problem cuz i wanna work and improve myself. I have a long story why but I dont think someone will want to hear it. Thank you sir for the help. My problem is more then that btw. Is something about someone married pls dont judge me.
Hi I have never been cheated on but I have had relations with girls who were in relationships. I am always paranoid this karma will come back to me one day which makes me believe the same will happen to me. How do I let go of my past so it doesn’t affect my future?
It will only come back if you believe it will. If you are constantly worried that this will happen, then your fears will manifest into reality. Forgive yourself for what you’ve done, and know exactly what you are looking for.
I have been away from my 15-year-old daughter for 8 years, and now I am moving back closer to her where I can spend time with her, yet she wants to spend time with her boyfriend, so I am jealous cause I want to spend time with her, so I said something disrespectful to try to manipulate her away from him for my quality time with her. My disrespectful comment pushed her away: so I admitted to her my wrong jealousy. Yet my jealousy feels validated after all I missed out on with her. (So I have some work to do Any suggestions?)
I almost lost my relationship recently because of misuse of my imagination,... Jealousy is demon that possess a human..... I really wanna get rid of it not even because of my relationship but for my self.... And I notice I start being stupidly jealous and imagine rubbish about my partner when I'm having financial issues, someone please help me
That's pretty rude to be honest. If my boyfriend did that I'd be pissed and hang-up. If there's other things she does like that then you definitely need to talk to her about it and either try to work with it or leave her and find someone who's really sweet and soft and loving and not looking for something "better". I hope you figure things out :))
Recently I think I see my partner staring at other men. We'll be out at the mall, and I keep catching it. I never say anything, but then I just get quiet and cold to her. I'm assuming I'm not making it up, as I trust what I see. The problem is, I know she will deny it anyway. I don't feel threatened by these men so much as I just feel less than. Am I not good-looking enough? It probably sounds silly, but it really hurts. I don't want to be a jealous guy, I don't want to seem like I am controlling what she looks at. I am concerned, though, as I've never noticed this in the previous 8 years we've been together. Sometimes I feel like I'm just crazy! I think its my own insecurities are the problem. Anyone relate to this?
I suggest you could go to therapy. If you have success and improve yourself and become a happier, more stable person this might be an inspiration for her to do the same. Instead of you just telling her to do it as if it was a command.
Photo thanks but she ended up breaking up with me by cheating this happened rights after that comment things are looking up for me I’m starting a business things are looking up
I seriously needed get control of my Jealous atimes iv in past be emotionally and mentally also abused by my ex husband whom lied and cheated over and over 😔😪 years now I'm I relationship with man I 💘 I have very hardtime control my Jealous I literally hate myself but I dnt think he understands why I'm like this please help me
I don't know but i feel like a monster and i hate it. I always get jealous and insecure about my friends from pre-school to high school. Everything is fine not until I get too close with them then, suddenly, jealousy rises. the worst part is, we're all good, I just get jealous because they always received the attention, while I felt like a display standing beside them. i know i am not pretty, not even smart nor talented. i am a boring annoying bitch and that is why i hated myself more. No matter how hard I try, I will always be nothing. I secretly think badly of my friends, cursing them at the back of my head and I know, it's wrong, but I can't help it. I even used to bully my friend secretly because of my jealousy. All I could do is cry. It's eating me.
I’m extremely jealous because some girl got in a really high position inside a group as a moderator without really doing anything. I don’t really see nothing special about her so it makes me jealous because there’s nothing that’s special about me either and I could be just like her.
There's nothing special about me either, but let's try and support each other! I'm an editor too, but I got jealous of this girl because her body tweening was so smooth and her shading was awesome and she is si good at everything while I'm not good at anything
@@KaikaiDokeshii Thanks for the support! I’m sure you’ll be as good as her someday. I’m a modeller and I get jealous of other people being better than me sometimes. But I get over that easily.
My friend got a puppy- i have been asking fro one for ages she also found her dream horse, but i have been lookign fr a horse for ages and having really bad anxiety, and sadness with it. I have been crying since she told me she is getting a puppy. Early this summe rshe was teasing me for askign fro a puppy, but her life is going great. But my 2020 haas been horrible. I had to let this out sorry-
Phoebe Don’t apologize for venting bro its alright, everyone needs to just let it all out sometimes. Its okay to be jealous, everyone gets jealous its just human nature, i get jealous alllll the time. The best thing we can do is just accept it, let the feelings pass and just keep pushing through! Using the negativity as motivation to do and be better. Be happy for your friend :) and don’t let other peoples lives effect yours. I hope you can feel better soon✨🌿🌈
If your friend is a true friend then.... Congratulations to your puppy and congrats on your new horse. What's mine is yours and what's yours is mine with my friends.
@@bordle4376 Thanks, that means a ton. She is my closest friend but she lives super far away so we don't talk much. I have started to accept it, and you reply helped me out.Thanks~
I just realized how childish this sounds, this is me a few months froward and I just wanted to tell you thank you. I am doing much better, in the time I was writing this I was really struggling in life and having many emotional difficulties. Me and that friend are much closer and she is coming to visit me very soon, although i am still struggling with jealousy but I am learning. Thank you two so much for replying...
Your point of view in jealousy is so wrong because first of all jealousy is one of the most painful emotional can anyone ever feel because it means that you will may lose this thing or this person that you need so bad and someone else will take it frome you ,and it's so painful to think that someone will take something important for you especially if it's the person who you love the most , it's like there's a knife in your heart and you don't know how to remove it . There's why it's important to know tha it's okay to feel this way as painful it is, there's nothing wrong with you , don't you think for a minute that it's because you're bad or wrong , in fact jealousy is a sing for you and you should get it your attention to discover what's trying to tell, take your time feel it, give it your all focus, if this is because of your partner talk to other girls /boys you may need to tell him /her that this is hurting you so bad and you need him /her to stop doing that and take care of your emotions, then you need to communicate to tell them that you need him /her to understand how painful it was to feel this way, and the he / she can give you what you need in this moment, maybe it's a hug or a kiss maybe an apologize for hurting your felling and making you fell that you have no value and anyone may take your place, express how you really feel, then you may need to strengthen the connection between you to be able to feel comfortable even if your partner talk to someone else and to be able to meet your emotional needs from him any time you need that. That's it and jealousy will go away, and always remember that there's nothing wrong with felling jealous of something or someone it's just how you feel and it's your sing that there's something you need and you deserve to have it. Have a nice day 💗
"misused imagination" i like this expression!
Ask yourself Is my thought Fact or opinion?
That's where I fell in love
Too Much time I've wasted with ridiculous imaginations and overthinking every single thing that comes out of my partners mouth. I'm tired, sick, and it's ruining my current relationship.
Whenever I get jealous, I tell myself that everyone on this Earth is flawed,
and that no one is perfect. And I tell myself that we all have brains that allow us to think and do brilliant things, and hearts that allow us to feel, and love others.
Pretty good
@Indy Jones BORROWING THIS’n
Thank u
Thank you 🙏🏻
thank you :)
It’s so hard to control it at that moment, it’s after I realize how stupid and irrational I’m being. It’s so hard to control!!
Yea..I’m here bc I want to be #1 in class bc I always was until I moved to this new school, a girl who’s like me, what I’ve heard from my new friend was that the girl looks like me (she’s online but I’m in school), she’s the same ethnicity, our names are the same but it’s spelled one letter differently, and she’s nice, we have 2 classes together, I’m better in one of them but whenever I win a game, our names are pronounced the same so my teacher says my name (Ik it’s me bc I see I’m #1 on my screen)but most people assume it’s the other girl bc they were with her last year. And she’s better in history so she always wins and my teacher says: Kaila with an i won!! She’s a better version of me
Yes
Yessss exactly!!!
It totally kills me! I’m so irrational and yet I believe it’s totally true. My partner is a beautiful man and women adore him. I’m not imagining it it’s a fact! I just don’t know how to turn this off 😢
you probably dont give a shit but if you guys are stoned like me atm you can stream all the latest movies on instaflixxer. Been watching with my brother recently xD
With social media we are constantly battling jealousy. It is worse than before the internet. The cheating is unbelievably easy too. I'm fed up with it.
I don't blame you! so am I! I've had it with it!
Agreed. I’ve dealt with it, and is still dealing with it right now, and I’m literally considering dropping out of the internet completely…
I hate men completely at this point because of it.
I feel jealous whenever someone got what I want, when I'm doing my best and didn't got it at all, and someone there getting it without any efforts at all, it makes me very irritated and hurt.
Same
Fact
Omgee
Isn't that envy?
Do you have a fb so we can be friends all together ?
I'm mentally exhausted from my constant jealousy. My husband is not perfect, but he tries to be the best person he can. I want to implement these tips for my sanity and to hopefully turn my imagination into good things. Thanks for the advice, I really to hear this.
How have you been coping with it?
I am being greaty affected by this, would like someone who feels the same to share her experience. I am a girl btw
Love the last comment: "Remember no one is out to make a fool out of you by cheating on you they are just making a fool out of themselves"
I have a really weird case of jealousy. I got jealous becoz this one guy apparently was attracted to this girl and I felt so jealous about it even though I don't really have any feelings for that guy. I keep thinking about that scene everyday and think that I can't live my life happily. Whenever I think I am not actually jealous, my brain is telling me that I am. I am tired of feeling this way
SARA NAAZ I understand that completely but his tips have helped with my problem. I hope it helps with yours
I think you are jealous of the adoration/worshipping because you want yourself more of that or feel a lack of it. Remember that you are yourself enough and dont need anybody to make you feel better.
Have you been able to sit on that jealousy, and see what inside you ight be causing oyu to really feel that way?
A Berryman that’s a huge assumption
Janelle Fraser how would someone sit on jealousy?
“No one ever makes a fool out of you by cheating on you. They only make a fool out of themselves” - OOFT bravo! 👏🏻
I tend to get jealous with my best friend. I absolutely love spending time with them and want them happy. I get jealous only with guy friends they hang out with, mainly because I feel like they're gonna replace me with them because I'm not good enough.
@Mellø4399 glad to know Im not the only one. I rarely feel like this anymore, part of it being that me and them don't talk anymore and drifted. And I also got more self confidence and try to live day by day rather than just worrying about the future too much
@Mellø4399 yes yes. It does. I just realized I hv a pattern. I used to feel jealous when my mom gv attention to my siblings. And then I did the same with my friends. If they paid attention to another friend I felt jealous and hurt, left out. And today when my sister dumped her idea of going shopping with me and went with her husband I could feel those jealous pangs again. Is there any solution to this issue.
@@ashak8356have you gotten better? How do you manage it?
@@sneha-qn4jn no dear. I still have this issue
I have already sabotaged a relationship because of this. I had completely forgotten about this comment.
Oh wow. I thought I was the only one who struggled with this!
The Green-eyed Monster has a bite... "Jealousy eats the body and anger burns the liver. Refrain from these two as you would avoid a lion." ~ Baha'u'llah, Baha'i Faith
Is that guy still alive?
@@r011ing_thunder6 Baha'u'llah died in 1892.
@@francismausley7239 i rest my case.
thank you…after seeing your video on tips for jealousy i felt so understood. i have the most loyal and loving partner in the world but due to imagination that every second tells me he’s cheating, this and that my relationship almost ended and now i need to do everything to work on myself. it’s very hard, but it’s so comforting to see advice so tailored for me. especially when you said once you worked with people who couldn’t even watch movie with their partner in case someone attractive appears in it..
i wish you did online therapy because i gave up on therapy as no one could ever understand this. thanks so much 💞
Thank you. Feeling it tonight, have a long term disability and am broke, my school mates are all wildly rich and have fabulous lives. Walks help. I was bullied by someone who became super famous, so I see their face all over the place and it creeps me out.
I love #3. And as you image the one you love innocently chatting with, or going to a dinner with an oppisite sex friend, Image the joy that the person you love is feeling, and be happy for the joy in their life. Their joy shouldn't pain you, it can bring you joy. The green eyed monster steals and lies
thank you im struggling and i need to watch more things like this
after watching the whole video, i say thank you again
Me too
God, me too!!!! I get SO jealous, &it feels really awful. It brings the worst out in me.☹️
Have you been able to reflect on what specifically makes you jealous?
Janelle Fraser yes I have but it doesn’t help
I really need this video, I don't get easily jealous but rn I got insecure about this girl, everyone think shes beautiful and she seemed perfect, it doesnt really matter to me long ago but now it got in my head, I always compare myself to her, I want to stop it, I know I am beautiful and amazing.
U must not get jealous because god does not see the beauty of the face he likes the one who has a beautiful heart and soul and they will be always blessed
I been feeling the same way about one girl. Shes so pretty and perfect
My issue is.. I used to be SO open with my exes until one relationship in which I never ever felt so empty before as I did with that man. I used to say to my exes check out that woman and we'd laugh together. Ffs to my failed relationship from 5 years ago, he was nice in the beginning, I rushed as I was 22 and then he stopped saying nice thing altogether. It was extremely rare and he was dry and blunt, but he'd have so much passion talking about other women's physical appearance, saying JLo is so nice she looked like this on the red carpet, then he'd stare too much at women on the street, at work, then he'd say that's just what men do. I became incredibly jealous of any good looking woman passing by me, online, etc. It stuck with me even 4 years later. I cry when I heated a guy I dated telling me he feels attracted only for 2 seconds if he sees a good looking woman in his visual area. I ended things (he didn't react too well anyway and was invalidating me so I did the right thing), but it kills me knowing that the only thing that helps me is hearing these words: I am never interested in any other woman, you're the most beautiful in my eyes (I know I'm not in the real world, because there's no such thing, but I'm always told how beautiful I am by everyone), no one is like you, you're special and physical appearance is so boring - like one of my exes used to say to me, a recent one. He turned out to be abusive but his reassuring words regarding this have helped me tremendously. Hearing 'get over yourself, is normal, I'm a man' is triggering to me, it makes me cry and hurts me so badly. I don't know how I'm going to date ever again.. I don't even know if that ex of mine meant what he said about me, since he turned out to be sadistic and lie, but hearing those words did help me..
in this video i really liked how you defined jealousy as a miss-use of imagination.i never thought of it in this way i just thought it was a desire of the human nature derived from one's mind to make more fortune or be in the position of second party.
I just can't avoid it please anyone help me how can i get out of it.
"Misused imagination".. ❤️ its helped me to realize that if the experience seems historical, to seek and heal that pain..
I really value that what we're learning and experiencing through practice is: we can heal our minds with healthy and beautiful imaginations also..
See, a lot of trauma can't necessarily be reconciled yet.. the Brain/ Mind is Magnificent... and using the same medium, our imagination, we can literally heal our brains, heal our bodies, heal our stories..
💜 carry on!
I periodically noticed this part of me recently and am glad to know that some others go through it...that alone relieved me a bit....Thanks
Same
1. Explore the past.
2. Separate past from present
3. Encourage good use of imagination
Thank you I needed to figure out my suspicions.
You were to the point, recent divorce.
I now know I fought for her, not guilt ridden. 635 min. Video, you condensed it perfectly, like we were having a direct conversation.
Your welcome
I was beyond confident for the first 5 months in my relationship until I saw messages that my boyfriend sent to few girls. Offering sex, of course. And now I struggle so much. He was insecure initially and I was very hard on him and I tried to forget this moment, but the monster is now awake. I wish to deal with my insecurities and start believing in him again. Initially I was really very trustful because I felt loved, but.....
Dont have a scarcity mindset
Doing this helped me
oh man this is so difficult, I get it under control and boom the thoughts come right back.. it's going to take some , i sure hope I can squash them for good
i'm from morocco and i love watching your videos especially the ones about hypnosis :) please keep up the good work.
اسرار الناس أمين 🙌🏽
My envy is not materialistic. Its that someone sought out pity for the doubt they experienced while living in a bubble of wealth, safety and security that I was denied at that age. While she is being surrounded with praise for things that came easy to her and she didn't earn because she dropped out of the right womb. But I am told to shut up and not tolerated for sharing my experiences that were difficult to live through and I feel need to be heard. My character is the outline of the wicked witch, where she would be the princess.
You must not overthink think yourself a soft character and think from your heart and appreciate
Hi Mark, I really like your work. Your model of jealousy as a misuse of imagination is quite astute, and I can see how the same idea can be useful for people with anxiety, as they misuse their imaginations to predict future disasters. Well done.
Ive been in love with my best friend since i met her, the thing is she's asexual and aromantic. We've talked about my feelings for her in the past, and sadly those feelings arent mutual. Im wildly insecure and anxious about myself, and i constantly feel she's going to replace me for another person. She became friends with another girl and i suffer everytime i think about it. I suffer so much but i know my jealousy is unjustified and just a distortion of my doom-pattern-seeking brain, as i've been replaced in the past numerous times.
This helps a lot, specially on differentiate between the past and the present. Thank you
Praying for peace for you.
I like to use the word desperate rather than jealousy. Cause i feel so vulnerable and naive.
This is so interesting, especially what you suggest about imagining a triggering scenario while in a calm environment. Thank you!
This is the only thing that I am trying to work on and some days are so hard,but there was a few helpful tips in this video that I will take with me and use them👍
Sorting my thoughts helps me, fact vs opinion, but I am still having trouble. Why can't I just not get jealous in the first place waaaa
I’m so glad to see that this video has more views than a lot of the videos on the same topic posted by young, attractive females. It gives me hope I’m the collective eq of the enm community
Its difficult when evaluating the past. The pattern of changes and the actions associated may helps towards increasing the imagination level. I thought I hate jealousy but now it is silently creeping in with the support of social media.
Thank You very much for Everything
How can I rewire pathological jealousy caused by multiple trust breaking incidents with the same person?
i need you to know that saying "jealousy is a misuse of the imagination" is what tethers me to this earth
I was looking for something on envy. Being overwhelmed with envy of others. Have you something on envy? Thanks for your very welcome and helpful teachings.
I think the ultimate best solution to help a jealous partner is to stop the relationship.
Starts at 2:31
I really enjoyed that and found that very helpful. Thank you!
I appreciate this information so much. Thank you. I really did find it very interesting, useful and helpful 💜😇✨
I can’t seem to stop being jealous with one of my friends because I think one day she’s just gonna choose other people over me because she has before in the past choose two of my friends over me
Its ok thers no matter to get jealous think god is your best friend or he will send u a friend.
my best friend has this other best friend and whenever they meet I feel really bad, but it's kind of selfish cause I also have another best friend but she lives in another country, so idk how to stop feeling this way, I really wanna be happy for her but I can't
U must not desire attention u r aim is to just make everyone good and help others and u r friends are becoming good u must be happy for it
@@Shri-b3v dude i know, but how
@@retratomujer u must think that nature and god are your best friend because nature replies tp your felings even though i have friends but my best best friends are nature and god they support u in all way
Jealousy = a misuse of imagination
I’ve been really struggling with this and there has been some situations that happened in my 25 years with my husband that caused me to be extremely insecure and have trust issues. And the past couple of years it’s gotten very bad, I’ve seen therapist and completed TMS treatment but still struggle with delusional jealousy. This is ruining my marriage, my life, and making myself look like a fool. I don’t know what else to do. Everyone around me has given up so I’m basically on my own.
I watched this after my nemesis Did a tiktok with My favourite tiktoker lmfao
I have a group of friends, I feel replaced by this 1 girl. Everybody talks when she is there, when she leaves the call everyone talks about it. When I leave, no one even cares or notices. She can send a message ans everyone writes back, but me? They only respond 1 word, like cool, oof or dont respond until someone switches the subject.
Wow What a coincidence i feel exactly the same way as if im not even that interesting sometimes
U must not desire attention u have to think that u r aim is just to make everyone good and help others.....
@@Shri-b3v Everyone I know ignores me, my friends from clubs like talking to my sister and ignoring me, my family likes my sisters more than me, my friends always ignore me. When someone is bullying me, my "best friend" just watches me suffer quietly.
@@fairymavis1 if u feel like that then u have to think that god nature and your angels are your best friend.....if someone bullies you they will suffer one or one day they wont get good place in heaven god decides it that heaven or hell even i do think that my best friends are nature god and angels even though i have friends. Nature....gives us oxygen and saved our life it even responds to our feelings
I don't know what others say....but hey it's perfectly fine what you are feeling....I read other replies....about God and angels and whatsoever....but I think you deserve the love care and attention you need....also love yourself... loving yourself is very important......if someone bullies you stand up for yourself and maybe be a person who also stand up for others.....be brave enough to point out to your friends that you feel left out.....may be they are doing it without even realising.... honestly I was stuck in similar situation for very long time.....I felt inferior but then I put some distance between myself and others.....and found that I was actually perfectly fine.... they just seem to careless about me....and maybe the new person you are jelous of can become your friend too.....
Just figured out i was pathologically jealous of other people...
Never thought i would have to watch this video until this point...
What if you're in a relationship with someone who cheated on you? Because you can't compare them to the ex if they are the one? Thanks
God bless you Sir
I've been a best friend with my crush for a long time until one day, she met one guy and then becomes closer to her in just one day. meanwhile, I, who been best friend with her for a long time never got that close. I don't know if she doesn't like me or not.
Watching them on a date
bad English lol
Being relaxed with your partner going out whilst having a hot bath (while he’s out with his friends having a hot girl trying to hit on him cause he’s gorgeous) - my mind is my worst enemy and I just don’t know how to undo this 😢
okay babes, first you have to know that your partner choose you. he choose you and he is continuing to choose you. there will be many “hot girls” but you are one too. get that in ur head, you ARE HIS HOT GIRL, not them. you can undo this by not feeding into ur thoughts. it will take time, but the brain is such a power tool. use it for good. next time your partner goes out, say “i hope he’s having a good time!” and “he will never feed into the hot girls around him, because I AM his hot girl”. once you convince yourself that, it’s over for you babes. i’m trying to get rid of my jealousy too! my advice also is try to find the root of your jealousy, and then untangle it like it’s a knot in your hair!
@@souls9988 Thankyou girl - everything you said is so true! I just find it sooo are sometimes to trust any man let alone my partner. I guess I’ve seen so many occasions where men have awesome girlfriends/ wives and they’ve been caught cheating. So I think, geez if they are doing that to their lovely wives and girlfriends, what chance do I stand? You are right though I need to find out why I get jealous xx Thankyou again xox
@@zinagrillo1 hey.. how r u now...were u able to get rid of it
Thanks great advice
Where do I find your article to help me overcome jealousy?
love this video it has good insight
when your partner is a liar you'll surely get jealous at girls he talks to
Yes thats true. Thats when the jealousy is situational
@@josie9583 u must not get jealous because god does not see the beauty of the face he likes the one who has a beautiful heart and not a beautiful face
Who would ever love a liar? And what does a person expect to happen, if they love a liar, other than been lied to?
But what if the partner you are with has betrayed your trust in the past and you are still with them?
Today I was jealous that the girl I like was talking to someone else even tho they're not even close to the same age nor would they even date eachother ever. I know it's because I'm insecure and feel like I don't have the communication skills that others have but it's hard to get out of the negative rumination
I have this really dumb jealously thing. I play a game called elder scrolls online. I met this person that I think we just clicked we got along right away we talk to each other every day and keep in mind we have no sexual attraction towards each other bc she's married and I have no interest in a relationship but I get so jealous when I see her getting along with someone else so well I'm constantly checking Discord just to see if she's online and talking to someone else. I need help with this desperately
I know my wife wouldnt do me wrong or step out on our relationship yet i still have the constant mental battle daily to not get jelous over stupid things!
For example if she says shes going out with friends, my mind will instantly start making up a whole story of how its going to go! As much as i know deep down its not real, i still cannot control the jelous beast and its frustrating, draining for us both and unnecessary! I deeply want to change!
Very much enjoy this
Can you also make a video for retrospective jealousy?
Have you been able to get any clarity with retro-spective jealousy?
@@JanelleFraser yes !! Have been working towards it . I am not all the way there but I am moving in the right direction!!
@@ramjoshi3809 That is so amazing! Congratulations, let me know what other kinds of content would help with your journey
@@JanelleFraser you should make some videos about retrospective jealousy OCD and give girls perspective about how they feel about it !! I am subscribing to your channel
This is my problem. If i stop doing nothing for 1 minute the imagination kicks in like a drugg and i start to create all this scenarios. I know is a problem i agree i have this problem cuz i wanna work and improve myself. I have a long story why but I dont think someone will want to hear it. Thank you sir for the help.
My problem is more then that btw. Is something about someone married pls dont judge me.
How r u now
i came here after watching horimiya and wotakoi: love is hard for otaku i feel like i might die if i continue this...
I love you ancestor!!! But when I seen your angles I didn't
I'm joking ly saying that
Burn
@@r011ing_thunder6
Loooooool
Thankyou so mych
Hi
I have never been cheated on but I have had relations with girls who were in relationships. I am always paranoid this karma will come back to me one day which makes me believe the same will happen to me. How do I let go of my past so it doesn’t affect my future?
I’m sorry to say It will come back karma always comes backs
It will only come back if you believe it will. If you are constantly worried that this will happen, then your fears will manifest into reality. Forgive yourself for what you’ve done, and know exactly what you are looking for.
Ananymous G appreciate it your comment 👍🏿
U have to regret on it really and not commit that mistake again be honest to one sincere partner then god will forgive u
👍👍👍👍👍 super helpful
I have been away from my 15-year-old daughter for 8 years, and now I am moving back closer to her where I can spend time with her, yet she wants to spend time with her boyfriend, so I am jealous cause I want to spend time with her, so I said something disrespectful to try to manipulate her away from him for my quality time with her. My disrespectful comment pushed her away: so I admitted to her my wrong jealousy. Yet my jealousy feels validated after all I missed out on with her. (So I have some work to do Any suggestions?)
How do you cope with jealousy when your mother speaks highly of all her grandchildren, my nieces who have things I don't have.
Can you explain it again once please
I know!
I almost lost my relationship recently because of misuse of my imagination,... Jealousy is demon that possess a human..... I really wanna get rid of it not even because of my relationship but for my self.... And I notice I start being stupidly jealous and imagine rubbish about my partner when I'm having financial issues, someone please help me
Yahuah Baruk you in abundance! Seek Yahusha Shalum & Ahabah
Don't ever lie to ur self even past d bad cheated u..
SKIP TO 1:23
you are deep!
Can it really be fixed ? Is it normal if at the beginning they are not like that ? 😔
I got jealous and angry of my wife today because she wants to give a plate a food to her child hood male friend. What should I do?
When I’m on ft with me gf she already adds another boy and just talks to him
She’s probably cheating
That's pretty rude to be honest. If my boyfriend did that I'd be pissed and hang-up. If there's other things she does like that then you definitely need to talk to her about it and either try to work with it or leave her and find someone who's really sweet and soft and loving and not looking for something "better". I hope you figure things out :))
yeah man, what she did is really rude tbh. Especially if it's out of context and consistent. I hope things work out though, but she'll have to change.
I feel jealous because my body doesnt look the part that i want.
My wife’s big brother tried to get down her pants… he didn’t but it occasionally gets me… I’ll get fixated and dwell … is this normal? Help?!!
Recently I think I see my partner staring at other men. We'll be out at the mall, and I keep catching it. I never say anything, but then I just get quiet and cold to her. I'm assuming I'm not making it up, as I trust what I see. The problem is, I know she will deny it anyway. I don't feel threatened by these men so much as I just feel less than. Am I not good-looking enough? It probably sounds silly, but it really hurts. I don't want to be a jealous guy, I don't want to seem like I am controlling what she looks at. I am concerned, though, as I've never noticed this in the previous 8 years we've been together. Sometimes I feel like I'm just crazy! I think its my own insecurities are the problem. Anyone relate to this?
I have felt this and it really hurts. Don’t have a solution but can empathise fully.
Me and my girlfriend are really jealous... but she refuses to go to therapy for it how can I change her mind..?
I suggest you could go to therapy. If you have success and improve yourself and become a happier, more stable person this might be an inspiration for her to do the same. Instead of you just telling her to do it as if it was a command.
Photo thanks but she ended up breaking up with me by cheating this happened rights after that comment things are looking up for me I’m starting a business things are looking up
Amazing video. I'm going through transformation in my life and film videos on how I'm overcoming them on my youtube chanel
Nice idée formation réality
To say what jealousy is hateing on yourself because wanting to be someone else.
I seriously needed get control of my Jealous atimes iv in past be emotionally and mentally also abused by my ex husband whom lied and cheated over and over 😔😪 years now I'm I relationship with man I 💘 I have very hardtime control my Jealous I literally hate myself but I dnt think he understands why I'm like this please help me
Like again👍🏼
Im Not Even Jeolous Of Not Having a Girlfriend Im Envious Of Tall People 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈
I don't know but i feel like a monster and i hate it. I always get jealous and insecure about my friends from pre-school to high school. Everything is fine not until I get too close with them then, suddenly, jealousy rises. the worst part is, we're all good, I just get jealous because they always received the attention, while I felt like a display standing beside them. i know i am not pretty, not even smart nor talented. i am a boring annoying bitch and that is why i hated myself more. No matter how hard I try, I will always be nothing. I secretly think badly of my friends, cursing them at the back of my head and I know, it's wrong, but I can't help it. I even used to bully my friend secretly because of my jealousy. All I could do is cry. It's eating me.
Jealousy is poison
:)
Thanks to you
I’m extremely jealous because some girl got in a really high position inside a group as a moderator without really doing anything. I don’t really see nothing special about her so it makes me jealous because there’s nothing that’s special about me either and I could be just like her.
There's nothing special about me either, but let's try and support each other!
I'm an editor too, but I got jealous of this girl because her body tweening was so smooth and her shading was awesome and she is si good at everything while I'm not good at anything
@@KaikaiDokeshii Thanks for the support! I’m sure you’ll be as good as her someday. I’m a modeller and I get jealous of other people being better than me sometimes. But I get over that easily.
@@cxtcutsml706 hey, no problem!
U must not desire for it only u have to think that u r aim is just to make everyone good and help others
My friend got a puppy- i have been asking fro one for ages she also found her dream horse, but i have been lookign fr a horse for ages and having really bad anxiety, and sadness with it. I have been crying since she told me she is getting a puppy. Early this summe rshe was teasing me for askign fro a puppy, but her life is going great. But my 2020 haas been horrible. I had to let this out sorry-
Phoebe
Don’t apologize for venting bro its alright, everyone needs to just let it all out sometimes. Its okay to be jealous, everyone gets jealous its just human nature, i get jealous alllll the time. The best thing we can do is just accept it, let the feelings pass and just keep pushing through! Using the negativity as motivation to do and be better. Be happy for your friend :) and don’t let other peoples lives effect yours. I hope you can feel better soon✨🌿🌈
If your friend is a true friend then.... Congratulations to your puppy and congrats on your new horse. What's mine is yours and what's yours is mine with my friends.
@@bordle4376 Thanks, that means a ton. She is my closest friend but she lives super far away so we don't talk much.
I have started to accept it, and you reply helped me out.Thanks~
I just realized how childish this sounds, this is me a few months froward and I just wanted to tell you thank you. I am doing much better, in the time I was writing this I was really struggling in life and having many emotional difficulties. Me and that friend are much closer and she is coming to visit me very soon, although i am still struggling with jealousy but I am learning. Thank you two so much for replying...
See yourself in her and think if u r pure hearted then god will help u one or one day and help others then gods blessing will shower upon u
My bro. is not even Talking to me.he is laughing @hanging out with my mom.
jeaulosy is a delusional illusion, right?
Plz I have a problem clearly
Jealousy cannot be treated. There is no effective therapy or cure.
Your point of view in jealousy is so wrong because first of all jealousy is one of the most painful emotional can anyone ever feel because it means that you will may lose this thing or this person that you need so bad and someone else will take it frome you ,and it's so painful to think that someone will take something important for you especially if it's the person who you love the most , it's like there's a knife in your heart and you don't know how to remove it . There's why it's important to know tha it's okay to feel this way as painful it is, there's nothing wrong with you , don't you think for a minute that it's because you're bad or wrong , in fact jealousy is a sing for you and you should get it your attention to discover what's trying to tell, take your time feel it, give it your all focus, if this is because of your partner talk to other girls /boys you may need to tell him /her that this is hurting you so bad and you need him /her to stop doing that and take care of your emotions, then you need to communicate to tell them that you need him /her to understand how painful it was to feel this way, and the he / she can give you what you need in this moment, maybe it's a hug or a kiss maybe an apologize for hurting your felling and making you fell that you have no value and anyone may take your place, express how you really feel, then you may need to strengthen the connection between you to be able to feel comfortable even if your partner talk to someone else and to be able to meet your emotional needs from him any time you need that. That's it and jealousy will go away, and always remember that there's nothing wrong with felling jealous of something or someone it's just how you feel and it's your sing that there's something you need and you deserve to have it. Have a nice day 💗