I was use to feel jealous and compared my life with others but not anymore once I realized it I felt very bad about myself. This bothers me more then anything else.... when I think what kind of person i was.
l do my best not to compare myself with others as l believe we all have our heavy cross to carry however with social media it's hard not to do so. When you see people enjoying life with friends and family (l am not in good terms with my family) it does trigger something. But one thing that l do is that l say to myself what can l do to get what they have? Also something to keep in mind is that social media is a facade, people modify their bodies, lifestyle etc just to look good online but we don't know what they go through on the inside.
Top 4 things that helped me stop comparison: - You can never TRULY know someone. So you're not actually comparing yourself to them, you're comparing the whole of yourself to your incomplete outside perception of them. - Even if comparison were fair and rational, it still doesn't serve us. It's a useless train of thought, thinking that way gets you nowhere. - You most likely don't want the other person's life, you just want a few qualities from their life. Maybe that's money, confidence or something else. But whatever it is, it's the quality you want, not the other person's life. So take the person out of the equation and just decide if want certain factors from their life in your life, if you do then make it happen. If you can't, learn to accept that. - Everytime you get a comparison thought, mindfully observe it, tell yourself 3 positive things about yourself, then let the thought go through distraction. You'll rewire your thinking.
Wow that is very beautiful. Great tips. If you would like, you're welcome to join our online Reddit community. These kind of posts would be so helpful to others. So much value my friend :-) thank you
@@NickKeomahavongOfficial @Nick Keomahavong yeah, words of wisdom. There is a way to trully know someone, but at that point your life is already at stage where you are above all that, comparison, jealousy, all of it. You start looking at them as different players, but deep down they are same force, divine energy, call it god or whatever. I trained my mind to ignore judgment, to accept people who they are, to accept world for what it is, but on the other hand we are creators of world, we choose what world we want to live in. We choose if we want to stay in negativity, judgement, doubt, selfpity,... Stronger than we think, material is merely energy condensed and our thoughts sometimes arent even ours to begin with. When you shut out all external noise and find yourself in that dark room, at that point you are in front of a challenge. Real you is hiding underneath all that loud noise, waiting to be released. . Question is, are you willing to see something you wont like? Different you, someone you dont know yet. Here's the thing, our ego is a quitter untill you change your mind. When you do that, this body will follow, your character will change habits or create new ones. Why i say this, because its easier to be something you are not, another person,.. when this mask starts to crumble, mind gets in trigger mode, either deal with it or go in that direction deeper and deeper. Why we compare, why we want to be partially someone else? This question was asked many times, here's my response. Because what another person creates can be in a way measured, ex, he's happy, look at his beautiful wife and home, that must surely be one of many reasons. Who you are under all that bs we projected onto ourselves is immeasurable, its something you cant define, our mind cannot comprehend yet. Exists as possibility to be created from a quantum field of energy called source. Thats why mind goes into trigger mode and stays in comfort zone, compares, judges,... Its a repetitive program and its on us how we program it. Working atm so i had to put it all together like this, anyways, mind is very interesting, especially when you go really deep. 🙏🥰🤪😃
I’m my opinion deleting social media is the same a treating the symptoms but not the root of the problem. If we all learn from his words, we should be able to enjoy and look at social media without feeling jealous or comparing ourselves to others.
Jesus is the only way to eternal life. He died on the cross and rose again on the third day so that you may be forgiven of your sins and saved from hell.Forsake your sin and turn to Christ. You will be set free and have everlasting life. Seek Him with all of your heart and you shall find
this exactly! the root of the problem is within ourselves, deleting social media isnt taking away the problem. I can scroll through social media without comparing myself & being unhappy or jealous, other ppl cant do the same. The root is within the mind, change the mind & social media wont be able to affect you
Yes this is so good thank you... I was very jealous of a girl who a guy left me for, I’ve never met her and only seen her profile and pictures online. It was a very dangerous thing to compare myself to, as it was only her perfected surface I was seeing, when she could be going through her own troubles that I am unaware of.
Don't compare yourself to others, compare yourself to you. Instead of trying to be exactly like other people, try to be a better version of yourself. Try to be calmer, more grateful, more generous, more loving, more understanding, more forgiving, more joyful and happy and less jealous, less angry, less envious, less egocentric, less sad, less bitter...Everyday, try to be better than you were yesterday, even if it's just a little, it matters. It's a key to your healing.
Thank you Cris. Just be gentle and patient with yourself. It takes time. Also, if you like, you are welcome to join our online Reddit community. Hear you and connect with others and receive support. There should be a link in the description :-)
I remember being 17, the fact that you saw this video proves you are already on to becoming your own best friend, I already see you as a very beautiful, kind and responsible person.
Hey Chris, this is an extremely challengng time. "hang in there" I too feel lonesome & rubbish about my life sometimes. I never expected to feel this way at my age (half Century) I run a gentle group Spirit of The Age Astrology and Spirituality on FB if you would like to join us I'm sure there are folk you would get a long with. Ten ;-) ;-) ;-)
I learned to deal to go of jealousy by 1. blessing the person and wishing them more good. 2. filling my head/heart with the thought that my Creator would/could give me the same thing or even better sometime in the future.
I looked at a tree in my garden today. Just standing, observing, listening, still, quiet. No need to do anything else. See the bird in branches. Hear the bees in the blossum. See the green if the leaf and the way every leaf allows light fall on the others. I felt at complete peace just for a that moment in time.
Jealousy is when you fear someone has stolen the affection of a loved one. Envy is when you think others have something that you can't have. Many people see things others have and feel envy as if they can't have it or better. If you see something that some one has and you want that, celebrate their good fortune and know you can also have it.
Or, probably more importantly to me, work on accepting that you can't have it and that's ok. There's lots of things we can't have for all different reasons and that's just how it is.
@Me4U I am dealing with envy and I'm telling you it gradually damages my inner peace and soul to the point it hurts. That is some kind of pain that has no limits. It is like an invisible prison. I highly suggest no one would let envy enter their mind. When envy somehow wanders around you, please shift your mind to love and care. Maybe I cannot see it and you cannot see it but people that we envy might be dealing with envy themselves. When we decide to sympathize, things get a bit easier. I am on the path to free myself from envy.
Yeah, but be careful what you wish for! Nick's fifth point is really important here: even if you do get the thing, it will come with its own suffering!
The desideratta says " never compare yourself with others, you will become vain and bitter. For there will always be greater and lesser persons than yourself".
I started an indoor garden to help with my patience and to improvemy garden skill. I'm in NYC. You ever saw a plant grow? It moves at its own speed... very slowly, often like a tortoise. Patience has been my one word for a few years now. I am better but not where I want to be... My plants are teaching me THAT LIFE HAPPENS and I am paying attention.
The act of comparing ones life to another, then feeling less than, stems from low self esteem. Find the part within you that is injured, acknowledge it, heal it, and let it go.
I used to get jealous easily then I found out I always ended my jealousy with underestimating others to make me feel better! But it's very bad thing to not treat everyone equally and kindly,then I started practicing Buddhism and read few books it's really help me to become good person and not compare myself with other dhamma really teach me to treat people equally and be happy about other people success! Who reading this I wish u to get good health, happiness and prosperity ❤️🙏 Sadhu sadhu sadhu🙏
Guys, I've been in a love relationship for 7 years now, and it's not just roses, poetry, rainbows, and birds singing; there are difficulties too. To think that everything is beautiful is an illusion
What really only matters is one question: "Have I gotten a bit better than I was yesterday?" Your potential doesn't need comparison with others. It's already there. You just need to unleash it
Love how you said "Train yourself in a gentle way". Words to live by. I often become too critical when I observe my mistakes. And this advice is a great reminder to treat myself with kind was even while I notice my own mistakes and don't guilt-trip myself about them.
An easy way to do it is to stop using social media and watching TV. I have never been a jealous person, so these things made me so exhausted because I felt like folks were trolling me with their stupid likes and TV was a massive time waste and provoked useless desire. It was the best decision ever, 14 years no TV and 3 years no social media. I'm clueless about pop culture and it feels so great.
Absolutely!! I am the same. No TV, no social media except for YT to learn and research. I have no idea what's going on with people's lives and it's great. I'm normally a very private person.
Psychologically, this is the one problem I had growing up. It was ingrained in me at an early age by my parents. It's the worst thought and feeling till this day.
@@MrPanzerDragoon That’s good. If you enjoy reading, I suggest you buy “ The power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle. I finished reading a few days ago. It has blown my mind away 🤯. The paperback is about 10 bucks. It is life changing ❤️.
When I was younger, I always compare my self to other and says, they are lucky and I'm not. But now, I always think that we all have our own karmas. We come back here on earth to do something. We have our own destiny and everyone deserve the best.
Another great video Nick. In 1982 my sponsors told me "quit comparing your insides to everybody else's outsides". Something I have continued to work toward on a daily basis for the last almost 39 years. Well presented Nick. As always, stay safe my friend.
This video lead to me having a breakthrough!!! I ended up getting in contact with a friend I was jealous of. She moved away and I felt hurt and jealous of her new friends and pushed her away. So I saw your video and cried realizing I could’ve stayed her friend the entire time!!! It’s been three years!!!!!!!!! My heart was so full of love I cannot thank you enough I hope you see this. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for your amazing teachings.
Thank you, it helps a lot. One thing I try and remember is that if you spot it you got it. So if you’re seeing things in other people you are jealous of, you have that inside you, you might need to learn to cultivate it. Haven’t figured out the money part, that’s pretty black and white. 💖🤩
Thank you. I struggle so bad with this and I hate it. I’ve tried asking the universe to disperse this energy away from me. It’s such a weird topic to talk about with people thank you.
Nick? You are one of the highlights that i found in this pandemic. You taught me so many things I do not know how to repay you. I will just pay it forward I guess... And integrate what I learned from you. Keep safe and healthy Nick! You are such a blessing Im so happy I found you
It’s true to the part you mentioned about some single people thinking that those in a romantic relationship must be nicer so they yearn to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend too. it’s all sweet and exciting the first couple of years, then it all becomes hard work when the romance sort of died down.... it’s never easy, being single, you lack of a companion and all the things couples do together but you get to focus on yourself with no distraction and you are free to do whatever you want. Being attached to a partner has it’s good and bad too. It’s all the same in the end like you’ve said. 🙏
Yes and no - some of people’s situations are based on privilege - not virtue and qualities. You’re so right at the end - be focused on VIRTUES not privilege
I feel better after watching these. I was so struggling compared myself to others because I couldn’t stop my parents to said things like comparison to me but I can stop myself from having a negative thought about it. And of course it really takes time to stop the thought. Thank you so much, I found these really helpful to me , it made me to look at life in a different ways.
One of the things I’m struggling with is trust. I was watching the video and the portion when you said to “practice spreading love and kindness even to those you dislike until it becomes more natural to you”… my thoughts immediately went to “but how can I trust them”. I immediately responded with fear that if I was kind to them, they would hurt me (not physically). I have been through a lot of Trauma and have so many fear. I have such a lack of trust in anything. I’m so tired of feeling scared all the time. My memories tell me it’s reasonable but I end up just hurting myself. I just want peace in my mind and body.
I AM OBSESSED WITH YOUR LAUGH...it makes me smile instantly. I can feel the energy an feeling behind It.....just know u are helping me so much and giving comfort..thank u ;) ❤
THANK you from the bottom of my heart for this Nick! It can sometimes be hard for me to understand and apply spiritual advice so these very hands on tips are much appreciated. I am at such a low point in my life right now and this seriously made my day-to-day life a lot easier to handle.
Thank you so much for this valuable piece of advice. This is the truest thing l have ever heard: Everyone experiences suffering. There was a girl in primary school that was my classmate l used to find her very beautiful and she had the prettiest stuffs, she was also talented she could draw and make jewelry, she was very skinny and elegant. l have to admit l was kind of jealous because l didn't look like her. We talked a bit since she was sitting besides me in class. Turns out she looked that way because she had an illness and she passed away at 20.
I just can't conceal how beautiful Ven. Nick is. How he communicate to the viewers and how he share his knowledge & wisdom to the world. Internet should be filled with videos like these.
I have been loving kindness to myself every single day even to my coworker.. I can recognize their weakness, sadness, emptiness. I no longer feel anxious, nor angry or jealous. I never felt so alive n full of potentials. God is good. Finally I can say that I am on my journey to be abundant with grace, love and many more. 🙏❤💪. Thank you Nick for sharing ur thoughts. Good quality content.. 🥰
Interesting insight to "Anumotanaboon" or rejoice in your merit. We do this (well, I do this) with small children. We rejoice every time when a baby tries to walk, or talk...just about anything kids learn something positive, we heap joy and encouragement to keep going. Why do we stop doing that as adults and be super critical (not the healthy kind either). As a parent, I do my best to give myself positive encouragement and strive to be my best in a healthy way so my kids learn to love themselves. Nothing is easy, life is tough and we make mistakes...be kind.
Be your own refugee is something that opened my eyes, although I overthink when I feel jealous, I will try and inculcate these tips. MANY THANKS Sir, your smile makes us feel your lightheartedness and also feel calm when listening to your content, Thanks again
Been really in a rut, I haven’t been comparing myself to others when it comes to craft. Feeling jealous, not good enough. like I haven’t improved and that no one cares. It’s been difficult to navigate these feelings but I’m going to start a journey of bettering my thoughts and putting these tips into action. Thank you so much for this video!
My mind likes to have imaginary fights with people I've never met, so now I catch myself in that moment and ask myself "Where is my enemy?". Honestly makes me laugh sometimes. Thank you for this video
Your tone, smile and body language project calmness. Combined with your words of wisdom, I aldy feel better after listening to you. Greetings from Kuantan, Malaysia
Thank you so much for this. I really needed this advice, I recently realized how my jealousy of others was taking over me and how toxic it was. It was even getting to the point where I would lie about my life to people just so they don't look down on me, which is embarrassing to admit. I have looked high and low for advice but couldn't seem to find ways to deal with it. This has just came out at the right time for me. Anyways, thanks again Nick, I shall apply this to my practice😊❤️
Wow Matt. I'm glad you're here. There are no coincidences my friend. I hope these tips are helpful for your situation. I'm cheering you on all the way from Thailand 😊😊
Amazing. I’ve never heard someone so honest approach on this widespread topic. I wish I had a family member that is a monk. They are very intelligent individuals. Why aren’t there more likes or more people watching this.
It’s the truth. Plain and simple, I’m having a good time watching the Dali lama video on you tube of overcoming anger and anxiety it has calmed myself in ways I cannot explain. But when I feel sad angry confused or like I can’t do it anymore I always make a vow of not talking until I can speak peacefully.
Meditation walking Share loving kindness compassionate caring with self and then radiate outwards Take note of your core and know your blessings with gratitude 🙏
I have two coworkers, they are the same age, one looks very young for his age and the other looks old, they compared themselves, one about how the other one looks and the other one about the achievement of the older looking, I told them: you have different priorities and you both had unique experiences so why does it matter what someone else has done or how they look? If you are happy that's all it matters.
I came to this video, because I've been feeling a lot of envy and jealousy towards one of my friends, it always seems as if tho she's always one step forward and achieving her dreams and goals, very similiar to mine, and I still got nothing! And the feeling has been killing me, I don't want to feel this, and this video was very helpful! I really have to work on it, and mostly on myself 💗
I don't go on social media either. At work I don't gossip about others and I try to think about the good points about others. At home I do gardening to connect with nature by feeding birds and hummingbirds. The only thing I have trouble with is loving myself. Go figure, I can look for good things about other people but not myself 🤔 I love your channel 💓❤️🧡💛💚💕
You’re epic! I teach people self love ❤️ every day! Awesome wisdom is something that money can't buy. God bless you for spreading love in most meaningful ways.
Whenever I catch myself comparing myself with others, I try to remember the moments that I did great things, so I feel again that I appreciate myself and I start trying to make greater things than in the past :)
Beautiful and thank you, this video has come to me when I felt jealousy of someone else and I said to myself I don't want to be jealous of them. I did not like that so I listened to a few videos and I saw this one. Thank you, this feels right.
That's so wonderful Lena. I'm glad you're here and I'm glad it's helpful. Yes use these tools and slowly integrated into your life. I think it will help :-)
I loved every bit of the teachings and they resonate. I struggle with the idea of someone doing way better than I strive to be good at. This video got me to reflect on my aspirational capacity and to keep it reasonably in check. Thank you
This video, as well as the comments, are so insightful when it comes to jealousy and comparing yourself to others. A lot of videos have the similar advice over and over again. This one is a lot different. I love the spreading of love and kindness to others, because I used to wonder why people spread so much love... and now I know why. The hardest part of all is knowing there are some aspects you cannot integrate into your own life. That's where the advice "We're all on different paths with different circumstances" is important.
I’m so glad your channel came up on my feed today. I watched a few of your videos and thank you for bridging mental health and Buddhism together. I’m dealing w/ mental illness due to death of a baby. I turned to in depth Buddha’s teachings to help me get through this suffering. However, Ive been listening/watching in Thai, some words were hard to understand. I’m glad yours are in English. I look forward to watching more of your videos. Btw, I’m from San Diego too.
Dear Nick, I know this will sound very strange - but every time I watch your video, the tears just won't stop and your words are very touching. Thank you for everything.
I take from the last part, life is a game of soccer. Be happy that you are alive and in the game. It certainly beats the hell out of being dead on the bench.
Thank you for another wholesome video full of practical tips! I really like the first tip on seeing the qualities we envy of others as expanders. I often feel inferior to those who are further ahead in life than I am and by seeing their qualities as a potential to growth I am able to see them as a giver rather than someone who is taking things away from me. :)
Oh my God ! I wrote down that jealousy and comparison are feelings that I have to get red of them .....then took my phone to watch some videos ... Suddenly i find this one 💚
I felt soo jealous to my frnss that they are studying well and settle in good job .....after watching your video ..I made my mistake clear 🙏 thank you 🙏om namo buddhaya 🙏🙏🙏
Regardlessly of social media it will never go away only way to eliminate is understand their insecurities I am opposite I get a lot jelly beans and know and understand why which help me to carry on.
Thank you Nick for this one. Your tip about giving space for each person in a notebook is helpful for me. Made me realize that each one of us has it's own strengths - just like in a rpg game, we are here to lend our strengths with each other. We just have to recognize what's ours and gather other people that we can share it with. :)
I adore you. You words are so beautiful and powerful and I can definitely feel your positive energy. I practice meditation since one year now and I’m learning a lot of amazing things. Some of theme are in common with the things that you say and I really hope to know in my life a lot of people that see the world and the people like you do. Thanks a lot for sharing with us your amazing thoughts 🙏🏻🌸
Thank you for sharing your wisdom! I am Christian ✝️, but I am always amazed about how many things Christians and Buddhism share together. In all the things you said the only thing I wouldn’t agree with as a Christian is to find refuge in myself instead of God. A big hug and a lot of respect to you!
That notebook idea is brilliant! I had a manager kind of direct me to do this by asking those who were doing their jobs really well how they did it. It didn’t really stick. But this hit me just right. It’s like hunting for treasure!
Your videos are amazing and always seem to pop up at the right time for me! I struggle with comparison in the sense of feeling “behind” in life compared to my peers. Career, relationships etc. But I try my best to focus on the fact we are all on our own path and the “behind” feeling is just a societal pressure!
The universe is just speaking to me. Today i had a jealousy dream where i was jealousy over a childhood friend and even when i woke up i still felt jealousy. And now this evening i land on this video. Thank you universe
I have never ever compared myself to others 👍😊I love myself just the way I am and as for being jealous of others never I am the type of person who is happy for others. 💚💜🤍👍😊
I am a Muslim and I find this to be helpful. If you pray success for others, the angels will say amen and Allah will give you that success to that person and to you as well so this takes away from feeling jealous of someone because you can get what they have if you wish them well
Thank you for this insight and guidance. I feel like I've been given a path that I can actually follow and it makes perfect sense. I'm looking forward to giving this a try.
I have a guru.He is enlightened but I also listen to your beautiful wisdom.Everytime I listen to you I feel grounded and elevated.I cannot thank you enough.Forever grateful…
Question of the Day: Do you struggle with jealousy and comparison? If so, what are you doing to overcome it?
I’m trying to replace comparison with admiration 😌
I was use to feel jealous and compared my life with others but not anymore once I realized it I felt very bad about myself. This bothers me more then anything else.... when I think what kind of person i was.
@@traycex wonderful
@@MoonLight-bu9hz yea it's not a good feeling.
l do my best not to compare myself with others as l believe we all have our heavy cross to carry however with social media it's hard not to do so. When you see people enjoying life with friends and family (l am not in good terms with my family) it does trigger something. But one thing that l do is that l say to myself what can l do to get what they have? Also something to keep in mind is that social media is a facade, people modify their bodies, lifestyle etc just to look good online but we don't know what they go through on the inside.
Top 4 things that helped me stop comparison:
- You can never TRULY know someone. So you're not actually comparing yourself to them, you're comparing the whole of yourself to your incomplete outside perception of them.
- Even if comparison were fair and rational, it still doesn't serve us. It's a useless train of thought, thinking that way gets you nowhere.
- You most likely don't want the other person's life, you just want a few qualities from their life. Maybe that's money, confidence or something else. But whatever it is, it's the quality you want, not the other person's life. So take the person out of the equation and just decide if want certain factors from their life in your life, if you do then make it happen. If you can't, learn to accept that.
- Everytime you get a comparison thought, mindfully observe it, tell yourself 3 positive things about yourself, then let the thought go through distraction. You'll rewire your thinking.
Wow that is very beautiful. Great tips. If you would like, you're welcome to join our online Reddit community. These kind of posts would be so helpful to others. So much value my friend :-) thank you
This is great. Thank you
Great and helpful❤
@@NickKeomahavongOfficial @Nick Keomahavong yeah, words of wisdom. There is a way to trully know someone, but at that point your life is already at stage where you are above all that, comparison, jealousy, all of it. You start looking at them as different players, but deep down they are same force, divine energy, call it god or whatever.
I trained my mind to ignore judgment, to accept people who they are, to accept world for what it is, but on the other hand we are creators of world, we choose what world we want to live in. We choose if we want to stay in negativity, judgement, doubt, selfpity,... Stronger than we think, material is merely energy condensed and our thoughts sometimes arent even ours to begin with. When you shut out all external noise and find yourself in that dark room, at that point you are in front of a challenge. Real you is hiding underneath all that loud noise, waiting to be released. . Question is, are you willing to see something you wont like? Different you, someone you dont know yet.
Here's the thing, our ego is a quitter untill you change your mind. When you do that, this body will follow, your character will change habits or create new ones.
Why i say this, because its easier to be something you are not, another person,.. when this mask starts to crumble, mind gets in trigger mode, either deal with it or go in that direction deeper and deeper.
Why we compare, why we want to be partially someone else? This question was asked many times, here's my response.
Because what another person creates can be in a way measured, ex, he's happy, look at his beautiful wife and home, that must surely be one of many reasons.
Who you are under all that bs we projected onto ourselves is immeasurable, its something you cant define, our mind cannot comprehend yet.
Exists as possibility to be created from a quantum field of energy called source.
Thats why mind goes into trigger mode and stays in comfort zone, compares, judges,...
Its a repetitive program and its on us how we program it.
Working atm so i had to put it all together like this, anyways, mind is very interesting, especially when you go really deep. 🙏🥰🤪😃
TYSM
I disabled my social media. Seems to help my brain immensely.
I’ve found the same.
Jajajajaaa
Same
@Corey M. J. Martin-Brock you think you can control your thoughts?
@Corey M. J. Martin-Brock 🤣 Chill, bruh.
I’m my opinion deleting social media is the same a treating the symptoms but not the root of the problem. If we all learn from his words, we should be able to enjoy and look at social media without feeling jealous or comparing ourselves to others.
Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊
Jesus is the only way to eternal life. He died on the cross and rose again on the third day so that you may be forgiven of your sins and saved from hell.Forsake your sin and turn to Christ. You will be set free and have everlasting life. Seek Him with all of your heart and you shall find
@@mikhay144 stop pushing your religion
this exactly! the root of the problem is within ourselves, deleting social media isnt taking away the problem. I can scroll through social media without comparing myself & being unhappy or jealous, other ppl cant do the same. The root is within the mind, change the mind & social media wont be able to affect you
Easier said than done. Unfollow the same people on your contact list and just follow your interest on social media, you will improve
I always remind myself with this quote "No one is you and that is your POWER".
sadhu sadhu. thank you so much for sharing Khrisyah 🙂🙂🙂
My late mentor always said: " Don't compare your inside with somebody else's outside".
That's beautiful. I love it :-)
That’s good! I’m going to keep that quote😊
Yes this is so good thank you... I was very jealous of a girl who a guy left me for, I’ve never met her and only seen her profile and pictures online. It was a very dangerous thing to compare myself to, as it was only her perfected surface I was seeing, when she could be going through her own troubles that I am unaware of.
So meaningful ❤️
Love that truth!🙏💚🌈we are all beautifully unique🥰
Don't compare yourself to others, compare yourself to you. Instead of trying to be exactly like other people, try to be a better version of yourself. Try to be calmer, more grateful, more generous, more loving, more understanding, more forgiving, more joyful and happy and less jealous, less angry, less envious, less egocentric, less sad, less bitter...Everyday, try to be better than you were yesterday, even if it's just a little, it matters. It's a key to your healing.
thank you SO much for this, this is a brilliant and beautiful bit of advice and i'm going to do this tomorrow 🙏❤
@@tillyreece8071 thank you! I hope this advice helps you. I myself am practicing this everyday and i’m a much happier person than i was a year ago!
i love this ❤️ the best motto
I’m only 17 but i feel stuck, alone, ugly and depressed! Thank you Mr. Nick, your wisdom is slowly transforming me into a better version of myself.
Thank you Cris. Just be gentle and patient with yourself. It takes time. Also, if you like, you are welcome to join our online Reddit community. Hear you and connect with others and receive support. There should be a link in the description :-)
Yes, his suggestions are positively wonderful.
I remember being 17, the fact that you saw this video proves you are already on to becoming your own best friend, I already see you as a very beautiful, kind and responsible person.
Hey Chris, this is an extremely challengng time. "hang in there" I too feel lonesome & rubbish about my life sometimes. I never expected to feel this way at my age (half Century) I run a gentle group Spirit of The Age Astrology and Spirituality on FB if you would like to join us I'm sure there are folk you would get a long with. Ten ;-) ;-) ;-)
At least you aren't 29.
I learned to deal to go of jealousy by 1. blessing the person and wishing them more good. 2. filling my head/heart with the thought that my Creator would/could give me the same thing or even better sometime in the future.
Beautiful 😊😊. I love that.
This is beautiful. Thank you I will use this.
As Mark Twain simply put it, "Comparison is the death of joy."
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nice
His awesome quotes just keep coming. Thank you for another.
My favorite!!
I looked at a tree in my garden today. Just standing, observing, listening, still, quiet. No need to do anything else. See the bird in branches. Hear the bees in the blossum. See the green if the leaf and the way every leaf allows light fall on the others.
I felt at complete peace just for a that moment in time.
That's wonderful Arthur :-) keep up the great work
Jealousy is when you fear someone has stolen the affection of a loved one. Envy is when you think others have something that you can't have. Many people see things others have and feel envy as if they can't have it or better. If you see something that some one has and you want that, celebrate their good fortune and know you can also have it.
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Or, probably more importantly to me, work on accepting that you can't have it and that's ok. There's lots of things we can't have for all different reasons and that's just how it is.
@Me4U I am dealing with envy and I'm telling you it gradually damages my inner peace and soul to the point it hurts. That is some kind of pain that has no limits. It is like an invisible prison. I highly suggest no one would let envy enter their mind. When envy somehow wanders around you, please shift your mind to love and care. Maybe I cannot see it and you cannot see it but people that we envy might be dealing with envy themselves. When we decide to sympathize, things get a bit easier. I am on the path to free myself from envy.
Yeah, but be careful what you wish for! Nick's fifth point is really important here: even if you do get the thing, it will come with its own suffering!
no one would like me to have anything, and when I do they go wild.
The desideratta says " never compare yourself with others, you will become vain and bitter. For there will always be greater and lesser persons than yourself".
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greater and lesser than are perceptions of the ego tho?
Charity begins at home. Home is the self. We cannot give love if we donot first love ourselves through patience, kindness, respect etc...
Beautiful ❤️❤️
I started an indoor garden to help with my patience and to improvemy garden skill. I'm in NYC. You ever saw a plant grow? It moves at its own speed... very slowly, often like a tortoise. Patience has been my one word for a few years now. I am better but not where I want to be...
My plants are teaching me THAT LIFE HAPPENS and I am paying attention.
Powerful words thank you
@@vhoy7899 People with Good knowledge and Wisdom can make this Great Comment 👍👍❤️
Love is Sharing and Helping and Teaching....😃❤️
The act of comparing ones life to another, then feeling less than, stems from low self esteem. Find the part within you that is injured, acknowledge it, heal it, and let it go.
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Comparison is a thief of joy
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I used to get jealous easily then I found out I always ended my jealousy with underestimating others to make me feel better! But it's very bad thing to not treat everyone equally and kindly,then I started practicing Buddhism and read few books it's really help me to become good person and not compare myself with other dhamma really teach me to treat people equally and be happy about other people success!
Who reading this I wish u to get good health, happiness and prosperity ❤️🙏
Sadhu sadhu sadhu🙏
Thank you so much for sharing Riti. Hope you're doing well :-)
Guys, I've been in a love relationship for 7 years now, and it's not just roses, poetry, rainbows, and birds singing; there are difficulties too. To think that everything is beautiful is an illusion
Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 thank you Caroline
OMG, can I please have a video of your laughing? It’s a whole therapy on its own. I can’t stop replying some parts where you laugh!
Let me just add: the background noises of nature and birds is amazing 💚
Thank you so much ava :-)
Thank you for sharing the wisdom. I felt peace,when I listened.please bless me.
I love the sounds too. Peacocks and roosters!! So nice 🌹❤️
What really only matters is one question: "Have I gotten a bit better than I was yesterday?"
Your potential doesn't need comparison with others. It's already there. You just need to unleash it
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@@NickKeomahavongOfficial Thank you for your videos. They're really helpful and inspirational, Nick 😊
Yes
Love how you said "Train yourself in a gentle way". Words to live by. I often become too critical when I observe my mistakes. And this advice is a great reminder to treat myself with kind was even while I notice my own mistakes and don't guilt-trip myself about them.
Thank you 😊😊
An easy way to do it is to stop using social media and watching TV. I have never been a jealous person, so these things made me so exhausted because I felt like folks were trolling me with their stupid likes and TV was a massive time waste and provoked useless desire. It was the best decision ever, 14 years no TV and 3 years no social media. I'm clueless about pop culture and it feels so great.
That's a wonderful tip :-)
Absolutely!! I am the same. No TV, no social media except for YT to learn and research. I have no idea what's going on with people's lives and it's great. I'm normally a very private person.
Same no TV, cable+ internet bundle. Just the internet from my phone!
@@quorrakai you are a wise human☀️
@@perlitalaguna6622 you are a wise human☮️💜
I like the quote "BE YOURSELF , EVERYONE ELSE IS TAKEN". 😊
That’s a beautiful quote 😊
I've been struggling with comparing and feeling jealous all the time...
Thank you for this❤️
You're welcome. Thank you ☺️
“if you want to be miserable, just compare yourself to someone.”
- margaret sanger, holocaust survivor RIP
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Psychologically, this is the one problem I had growing up. It was ingrained in me at an early age by my parents. It's the worst thought and feeling till this day.
☹️ try meditating.... almost guaranteed it will help you ❤️
@@Cherry-lm9rz I've started small recently with the Sam Harris app.
@@MrPanzerDragoon
That’s good. If you enjoy reading, I suggest you buy “ The power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle. I finished reading a few days ago. It has blown my mind away 🤯. The paperback is about 10 bucks. It is life changing ❤️.
@@Cherry-lm9rz ooh thanks!
@@MrPanzerDragoon
Anytime 🙂
When I was younger, I always compare my self to other and says, they are lucky and I'm not. But now, I always think that we all have our own karmas. We come back here on earth to do something. We have our own destiny and everyone deserve the best.
Wonderful insight 😊😊😊
There's no enemy outside our soul, the real enemies live inside us Anger, hate, ego and greed. 🙏🙏🙏☸☸
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Transforming bloodshed into beauty and raising the phoenix of forbidden expression - The real war is in us.
-MIA
I did fall into that trap of thinking others don’t experience suffering. Going to do my best to do the exercises you shared 🙏🏼
Wonderful ☺️
I will start learning from people from now on instead of being jealous. Also, being more kind on purpose.
Another great video Nick. In 1982 my sponsors told me "quit comparing your insides to everybody else's outsides". Something I have continued to work toward on a daily basis for the last almost 39 years. Well presented Nick. As always, stay safe my friend.
Thank you Hugh. And that's great advice from your sponsor :-)
I don't get this , as I don't, trust me LOL
Stop looking at others just look at your self you are worth it you are amazing
Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊
My heart feels at peace in a new way for the first time in a very very long time
Beautiful. It's time ☺️☺️
I sometimes tell myself, 'Im not better than anybody and nobody is better than me.!'
@Rh-bk8pu Amen. God bless you 😇🙏🤗🙏🤗🙏
Literally catching up on all your videos in 2023! You are the absolute best, This world is so blessed to have you!
Aww thank you so much! Enjoy your time 😊
This video lead to me having a breakthrough!!! I ended up getting in contact with a friend I was jealous of. She moved away and I felt hurt and jealous of her new friends and pushed her away. So I saw your video and cried realizing I could’ve stayed her friend the entire time!!! It’s been three years!!!!!!!!! My heart was so full of love I cannot thank you enough I hope you see this. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for your amazing teachings.
Wonderful. I'm glad it's been able to bring you some resolution to your life. That's great to hear my friend 😊
This gave me comfort. I’m not a Buddhist but this was very enlightening. Thank you for sharing!
Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 thank you ysabella
I love this so much. I want to use my jealousy to improve myself not to destroy other peoppe
Beautiful Lou. Yes use it to gain insight into yourself and also to improve yourself :-)
Thank you, it helps a lot. One thing I try and remember is that if you spot it you got it. So if you’re seeing things in other people you are jealous of, you have that inside you, you might need to learn to cultivate it. Haven’t figured out the money part, that’s pretty black and white. 💖🤩
Thank you. I struggle so bad with this and I hate it. I’ve tried asking the universe to disperse this energy away from me. It’s such a weird topic to talk about with people thank you.
You’re welcome! I’m glad it’s helpful 😊
Nick? You are one of the highlights that i found in this pandemic. You taught me so many things I do not know how to repay you. I will just pay it forward I guess... And integrate what I learned from you.
Keep safe and healthy Nick! You are such a blessing Im so happy I found you
Thank you so much my friend. Yes keep continue to train yourself diligently :-) that is the best gift.
Not caring people ! And trying to find peace and joy being alone 😍🥰 it helps to overcome them.
It’s true to the part you mentioned about some single people thinking that those in a romantic relationship must be nicer so they yearn to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend too. it’s all sweet and exciting the first couple of years, then it all becomes hard work when the romance sort of died down.... it’s never easy, being single, you lack of a companion and all the things couples do together but you get to focus on yourself with no distraction and you are free to do whatever you want. Being attached to a partner has it’s good and bad too. It’s all the same in the end like you’ve said. 🙏
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Yes and no - some of people’s situations are based on privilege - not virtue and qualities. You’re so right at the end - be focused on VIRTUES not privilege
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@@NickKeomahavongOfficial thank you!!🙏
Always start your day with a greatful heart, don't compare, don't feel envy to others. 💕
Beautiful ❤️
Easier said then done
Off topic - You reply to your comments - a lost compassion. People yearn for a connection. You make the effort. Very compassionate.
Thank you Mrs. Bizzy. I do my best. I think it's important to acknowledge people's efforts. It's very sweet. 🙂🙂
I feel better after watching these. I was so struggling compared myself to others because I couldn’t stop my parents to said things like comparison to me but I can stop myself from having a negative thought about it. And of course it really takes time to stop the thought. Thank you so much, I found these really helpful to me , it made me to look at life in a different ways.
Wonderful. I'm glad it was helpful. Thank you my friend 😊😊
One of the things I’m struggling with is trust. I was watching the video and the portion when you said to “practice spreading love and kindness even to those you dislike until it becomes more natural to you”… my thoughts immediately went to “but how can I trust them”. I immediately responded with fear that if I was kind to them, they would hurt me (not physically). I have been through a lot of Trauma and have so many fear. I have such a lack of trust in anything. I’m so tired of feeling scared all the time. My memories tell me it’s reasonable but I end up just hurting myself. I just want peace in my mind and body.
It's ok Ashley. Just give it a try and diligently spread loving kindness and forgiveness to yourself and others everyday. It's definitely a practice 😊
I’m struggling in the same way…. I’m at a loss……..
I AM OBSESSED WITH YOUR LAUGH...it makes me smile instantly. I can feel the energy an feeling behind It.....just know u are helping me so much and giving comfort..thank u ;) ❤
Hahaha. Thank you so much my friend 😊Greetings to you all the way from Thailand :-) stay safe.
Me too ...!😄
THANK you from the bottom of my heart for this Nick! It can sometimes be hard for me to understand and apply spiritual advice so these very hands on tips are much appreciated.
I am at such a low point in my life right now and this seriously made my day-to-day life a lot easier to handle.
Sadhu sadhu 😀😀 thank you so much and hang in there my friend
Thank you so much for this valuable piece of advice. This is the truest thing l have ever heard: Everyone experiences suffering. There was a girl in primary school that was my classmate l used to find her very beautiful and she had the prettiest stuffs, she was also talented she could draw and make jewelry, she was very skinny and elegant. l have to admit l was kind of jealous because l didn't look like her. We talked a bit since she was sitting besides me in class. Turns out she looked that way because she had an illness and she passed away at 20.
I'm sorry to hear that. That's unfortunate.
WHY AM I EVEN CRYING? THIS IS SO GOOD!!!
❤️❤️
Namo Buddhaye.Thank you bhanteji for your precious preaching.
You’re welcome. Thank you 😊
I just can't conceal how beautiful Ven. Nick is. How he communicate to the viewers and how he share his knowledge & wisdom to the world. Internet should be filled with videos like these.
Thank you so much for your kindness 😊😊
I have been loving kindness to myself every single day even to my coworker.. I can recognize their weakness, sadness, emptiness. I no longer feel anxious, nor angry or jealous. I never felt so alive n full of potentials. God is good. Finally I can say that I am on my journey to be abundant with grace, love and many more. 🙏❤💪. Thank you Nick for sharing ur thoughts. Good quality content.. 🥰
That is beautiful. Keep it up :-)
Interesting insight to "Anumotanaboon" or rejoice in your merit. We do this (well, I do this) with small children. We rejoice every time when a baby tries to walk, or talk...just about anything kids learn something positive, we heap joy and encouragement to keep going. Why do we stop doing that as adults and be super critical (not the healthy kind either). As a parent, I do my best to give myself positive encouragement and strive to be my best in a healthy way so my kids learn to love themselves. Nothing is easy, life is tough and we make mistakes...be kind.
That's wonderful. Thank you for sharing this 😊😊
Beautifully said.
Be your own refugee is something that opened my eyes, although I overthink when I feel jealous, I will try and inculcate these tips. MANY THANKS Sir, your smile makes us feel your lightheartedness and also feel calm when listening to your content, Thanks again
Awww that's very kind of you. thank you so much :)
Been really in a rut, I haven’t been comparing myself to others when it comes to craft. Feeling jealous, not good enough. like I haven’t improved and that no one cares. It’s been difficult to navigate these feelings but I’m going to start a journey of bettering my thoughts and putting these tips into action. Thank you so much for this video!
I wish you well on this journey. May it be a successful one🤗
Jealousy and comparison actually fades as you get older.
Thank God
🙂🙂
My mind likes to have imaginary fights with people I've never met, so now I catch myself in that moment and ask myself "Where is my enemy?". Honestly makes me laugh sometimes. Thank you for this video
Your tone, smile and body language project calmness. Combined with your words of wisdom, I aldy feel better after listening to you. Greetings from Kuantan, Malaysia
Thank you so much koksing 😊😊
Thank you so much for this. I really needed this advice, I recently realized how my jealousy of others was taking over me and how toxic it was. It was even getting to the point where I would lie about my life to people just so they don't look down on me, which is embarrassing to admit. I have looked high and low for advice but couldn't seem to find ways to deal with it. This has just came out at the right time for me. Anyways, thanks again Nick, I shall apply this to my practice😊❤️
Wow Matt. I'm glad you're here. There are no coincidences my friend. I hope these tips are helpful for your situation.
I'm cheering you on all the way from Thailand 😊😊
@@NickKeomahavongOfficial thank you very much 🙏
This video is so precious. I ran into it at such great timing it almost feels like it's meant to find me. Anumotanaboon!
Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 thank you so much. Glad it's helpful
You’re a beautiful soul with the ability to share profound wisdom in a easily relatable way. You make the world a better place 🙏🏻
sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂
Amazing. I’ve never heard someone so honest approach on this widespread topic. I wish I had a family member that is a monk. They are very intelligent individuals. Why aren’t there more likes or more people watching this.
Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 thank you so much melissa.
It’s the truth. Plain and simple, I’m having a good time watching the Dali lama video on you tube of overcoming anger and anxiety it has calmed myself in ways I cannot explain. But when I feel sad angry confused or like I can’t do it anymore I always make a vow of not talking until I can speak peacefully.
Meditation walking
Share loving kindness compassionate caring with self and then radiate outwards
Take note of your core and know your blessings with gratitude 🙏
Beautiful 😊😊
I have two coworkers, they are the same age, one looks very young for his age and the other looks old, they compared themselves, one about how the other one looks and the other one about the achievement of the older looking, I told them: you have different priorities and you both had unique experiences so why does it matter what someone else has done or how they look? If you are happy that's all it matters.
I came to this video, because I've been feeling a lot of envy and jealousy towards one of my friends, it always seems as if tho she's always one step forward and achieving her dreams and goals, very similiar to mine, and I still got nothing! And the feeling has been killing me, I don't want to feel this, and this video was very helpful! I really have to work on it, and mostly on myself 💗
I don't go on social media either. At work I don't gossip about others and I try to think about the good points about others. At home I do gardening to connect with nature by feeding birds and hummingbirds. The only thing I have trouble with is loving myself. Go figure, I can look for good things about other people but not myself 🤔 I love your channel 💓❤️🧡💛💚💕
Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 thank you
You’re epic! I teach people self love ❤️ every day! Awesome wisdom is something that money can't buy. God bless you for spreading love in most meaningful ways.
Aww thank you my friend. And keep up the wonderful work you are doing also ☺️😘
Whenever I catch myself comparing myself with others, I try to remember the moments that I did great things, so I feel again that I appreciate myself and I start trying to make greater things than in the past :)
Wonderful 😊
Beautiful and thank you, this video has come to me when I felt jealousy of someone else and I said to myself I don't want to be jealous of them. I did not like that so I listened to a few videos and I saw this one. Thank you, this feels right.
That's so wonderful Lena. I'm glad you're here and I'm glad it's helpful. Yes use these tools and slowly integrated into your life. I think it will help :-)
I haven't had fb in 7 years. I cannot stand the drama, the bragging, the hate. I'm over it all.
Yes it can be toxic at times.
I loved every bit of the teachings and they resonate. I struggle with the idea of someone doing way better than I strive to be good at. This video got me to reflect on my aspirational capacity and to keep it reasonably in check. Thank you
This video, as well as the comments, are so insightful when it comes to jealousy and comparing yourself to others. A lot of videos have the similar advice over and over again. This one is a lot different. I love the spreading of love and kindness to others, because I used to wonder why people spread so much love... and now I know why.
The hardest part of all is knowing there are some aspects you cannot integrate into your own life. That's where the advice "We're all on different paths with different circumstances" is important.
Thank you so much my friend. I'm glad it resonates with you :)
What a great idea! To sit down with a person and genuinely discuss their good qualities with them 🙏
sadhu sadhu.🙂🙂🙂
I’m so glad your channel came up on my feed today. I watched a few of your videos and thank you for bridging mental health and Buddhism together. I’m dealing w/ mental illness due to death of a baby. I turned to in depth Buddha’s teachings to help me get through this suffering. However, Ive been listening/watching in Thai, some words were hard to understand. I’m glad yours are in English. I look forward to watching more of your videos. Btw, I’m from San Diego too.
Wow. Thank you
Dear Nick, I know this will sound very strange - but every time I watch your video, the tears just won't stop and your words are very touching.
Thank you for everything.
Aww thank you my friend. I'm glad it resonates with you :)
I take from the last part, life is a game of soccer. Be happy that you are alive and in the game. It certainly beats the hell out of being dead on the bench.
🙂🙂
Thank you for another wholesome video full of practical tips! I really like the first tip on seeing the qualities we envy of others as expanders. I often feel inferior to those who are further ahead in life than I am and by seeing their qualities as a potential to growth I am able to see them as a giver rather than someone who is taking things away from me. :)
Sadhu Emmy. That's a great perspective to look at people from. We have so many teachers to learn from 😊😊
Oh my God ! I wrote down that jealousy and comparison are feelings that I have to get red of them .....then took my phone to watch some videos ... Suddenly i find this one 💚
Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 welcome to the channel my friend. Hope it was helpful.
This applies to more than just jealousy, it applies in general happiness as well. Appreciate the video, thank you 🙏🏻
Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 thank you Iris
I felt soo jealous to my frnss that they are studying well and settle in good job .....after watching your video ..I made my mistake clear 🙏 thank you 🙏om namo buddhaya 🙏🙏🙏
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Regardlessly of social media it will never go away only way to eliminate is understand their insecurities I am opposite I get a lot jelly beans and know and understand why which help me to carry on.
😊
Thank you Nick for this one. Your tip about giving space for each person in a notebook is helpful for me. Made me realize that each one of us has it's own strengths - just like in a rpg game, we are here to lend our strengths with each other. We just have to recognize what's ours and gather other people that we can share it with. :)
It's a pleasure. I'm glad it's helpful. thank you.
This is absolutely AMAZING! I’ve been asking myself how to overcome jealousy a lot lately....thank you Jesus!
Thank you Jennifer. I'm glad it was helpful 😊😊
I adore you. You words are so beautiful and powerful and I can definitely feel your positive energy. I practice meditation since one year now and I’m learning a lot of amazing things. Some of theme are in common with the things that you say and I really hope to know in my life a lot of people that see the world and the people like you do. Thanks a lot for sharing with us your amazing thoughts 🙏🏻🌸
Aww thank you so much Dr. Sabrina. I'm glad it's helpful. And please keep up with your meditation practice. It's very important ☺️☺️
Thank you for sharing your wisdom! I am Christian ✝️, but I am always amazed about how many things Christians and Buddhism share together. In all the things you said the only thing I wouldn’t agree with as a Christian is to find refuge in myself instead of God. A big hug and a lot of respect to you!
Wonderful 😊 yes both teachings are beautiful.
That notebook idea is brilliant! I had a manager kind of direct me to do this by asking those who were doing their jobs really well how they did it. It didn’t really stick. But this hit me just right. It’s like hunting for treasure!
Wonderful Debbie. I'm glad it's helpful :-) give it a try and let us know how it goes.
I overcome it to focus myself more and love myself more and see the good things of other people..
Wonderful 😊😊
That rooster is giving his amens.
😂😂😂
yes I am jealous of the rooster....
Your videos are amazing and always seem to pop up at the right time for me! I struggle with comparison in the sense of feeling “behind” in life compared to my peers. Career, relationships etc. But I try my best to focus on the fact we are all on our own path and the “behind” feeling is just a societal pressure!
Yes that's very normal. Just now use the energy to put into your own self work :-) you got this 😊😊
I randomly clicked on this and realized I badly needed it ... 🙏
Thank you. I’m glad it’s helpful 😊
The universe is just speaking to me. Today i had a jealousy dream where i was jealousy over a childhood friend and even when i woke up i still felt jealousy. And now this evening i land on this video. Thank you universe
Wonderful. I hope it's helpful :)
I have never ever compared myself to others 👍😊I love myself just the way I am and as for being jealous of others never I am the type of person who is happy for others. 💚💜🤍👍😊
Wonderful 😊😊
I am a Muslim and I find this to be helpful. If you pray success for others, the angels will say amen and Allah will give you that success to that person and to you as well so this takes away from feeling jealous of someone because you can get what they have if you wish them well
Ameen!
Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊
Thank you for posting every morning!
I like starting my day with these kinds of reminders.
-sending peace from Philippines!
Thank you catherine. I'm glad it's helpful :) Greetings to you from Thailand.
Thank you for this insight and guidance. I feel like I've been given a path that I can actually follow and it makes perfect sense. I'm looking forward to giving this a try.
@@Starbucksgurl21 oh wonderful! Yes, please give it a try and keep us updated. :-)
I have a guru.He is enlightened but I also listen to your beautiful wisdom.Everytime I listen to you I feel grounded and elevated.I cannot thank you enough.Forever grateful…