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Sleezy manipulation tactic men use on women | Dating and relationship red flags 🚩
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- Опубліковано 3 лис 2021
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Sleezy manipulation tactic cheating men use on women | Dating and relationship red flags
A lot of men try to manipulate women out of holding them accountable for their actions. Men often. They weaponize the idea of trust to stop a woman from expressing her concerns and grief about their infidelity and indiscretions. Don’t miss this dating and relationship red flag. Don’t make the mistake of allowing a man to manipulate you into taking mess and excepting harmful behavior without repercussions and moving forward in a healthy way with you. Healing takes a commitment from both people if a man won’t commit to healing with you after breaking your trust then he isn’t worth your forgiveness. When you man cheats on you he needs to take accountability. Not guilt you into trying to pretend you trust him or forgive him, or have gotten over it.
Dating red flags
Relationship red flags
Dating mistakes women make
Manipulation tactics men use on women
Why men cheat
"It's not your job to trust the untrust-worthy it's THEIR job to EARN your trust!" - put that on repeat.
Okay but the real question is why do some men accept this type of low level behaviour from themselves? They obviously do not really love or care about themselves. Not enough to carry themselves in a respectful manner. Like if you knew people in your circle who were treating others that way, most people wouldn't continue to be friends with that person. I have always wondered how men respect one another when they know the manipulation that they carry out on others.
AHE BAY BAY BAY BAY.
Hell yes!!💯💯💯
Basically, a man worth spending or giving your time to, will care about how you feel, even if he knows you are mistaken. It’s called empathy.
Jacob Seymore hi, can you break that down a little more please? Thanks
.
@@anitarogers2877 does it feel messed up?
.
💪🏾
Relationships are so exhausting in 2021.
Happy alone. Less stress
Amen sister
I totally agree that relationship in 2021 are exhausting. But I'll never give up on truth and real love
@@khayabaker7047 power of choice & faith 👏
@mina 🙌🏾
Yes ma’am
When you hold a manipulator accountable and confront them about a shady behavior or a violation of trust they will accuse you of having “trust issues”.
they're emotionally abusive and trying to create a trauma bond
they plot this online it's called dread game
Or that you are insecure. Anything to deflect away from him being accountable
@@seabreeze4559 exactly.
just tell him and you have " telling the damn truth issues"😂🤷♀️
@@candacecasey5634 Perefect response answer!!! 😹😺😹😺😹
Been through this. At this point I don’t even bother to confront I just cut them off. Not sleeping with him makes it so easy to break away. Toxic dudes 😩
Exactly!
Same
Same!!
It's the,
"not sleeping with them" part for me.
It's such a virtuous and powerful position to release what's not working when you haven't over given of yourself.
Same!!!
They try to play victim when you call them on inappropriate behavior.
It’s gas lighting 101
Yesssss
💯
Narcissist's bag of tricks!🤨🤔😱😫🤮😡👿
Yep 👍🏾 he do fr in so done with bs
They’re more piss at you for not trusting them… but not upset at themselves for doing some sketchy mess that resulted in them losing your trust.
Exactly narcissistic behaviors smh 🤦🏽♀️
EBaaaaaaabaaaiieee say it again! 💯
he had 3 major cheats (not sure how many others) when He THOUGHT I cheated he went thru the roof.
🎯
I agree with you on this..
Another red flag when a guy insults you but says it's a joke and you're too sensitive that's when you run fast
@🐰Choccy Bunny🐰 sorry to hear that it always starts as verbal then turns to physical abuse
That's a really good comment there
Omg a guy bullied me and insulted me n said you're too sensitive
N also I was dumb
I led him on n had an affair with someone else ( so much impulsivity)
But I enjoyed that
Yup I confronted my ex about a lie and he tried to deflect and shift blame but I wouldn’t allow it. So he got angry threw a tantrum was distant for a couple days then broke up with me and I refuse to reach out. You can’t hold me to standards and all these requirements you are not even keeping yourself.
You better preach!
You dodged a bullet! Good for you, he sounds like a total emotionally unintelligent loser.
@@tammya5403 yup pretty much he tried to flip the script, and I noticed the calmer I was and I was gently assertive he continued to escalate and throw subliminal insults in an attempt to trigger a emotional response so he could flip it and say see your crazy thats why ABC…but nope to smart for that. Don’t fall for the trap. Thats a technique they use to blame shift to let them off the hook for their bad behavior that caused the drama in the first place.
@@dp1202 Ew that whole technique sounds like my ex. The fact that you didn’t respond crazy like him & you literally walked away from the situation is a SKILL a lot of women don’t have at all. I know I didn’t have that skill til recently, cause I learned that fighting fire with fire don’t get nobody nowhere. You gotta hose that fire with some calm cool water😂
@@dp1202 whew honey love you are way better than me lol I don't have that much grace and patience. What's interesting is the men I have messed with in some sick and twisted way they get turned on with me getting ignorant with them when they get ignorant with me. I say what I gotta say and keep it moving and girl then they go the audcity to try and come back when time has passed..the nerve
My take away…
Knowing our worth will allow us to walk away from f-boy manipulation tactics.
A man actions speaks volume.
Trust is earned not given.
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Periodt
F-boy 😂
Amen! Words are just lip service unless there are actions behind them. Actions tell the tale. No energy, low energy, expect me to bow down & "know my place." Be ready to watch my sweet behind walk out the door!
Thank you! I ended my situationship this morning. Why all because of your videos. Im just tired and I pulled the plug 🔌. So thank thank thank you! You have no idea how much your guidance! 😇😉
Congratulations! I am glad you can now look for a healthy and happy relationship instead of being stuck in an unhealthy thus unhappy one. Toxic/manipulative people ruin the dating world, but it sucks to be them because while they try to hurt people everyone else will have their own life. I wish I saw Kev's videos years ago, but it's never too late to watch his content. Finding your true love is hard but it doesn't need to be miserable.
I ended mine Sunday!
No time, and too old for B.S!
trust is a bond it goes both ways
either end with problems, it's gone
I’ll pray for you, friend 🌹
Way to go 😊
This is the first day of your best life
A real man Knows trust is earned . So if a man says “you need to trust me?” RUN!!
I think it's important to distinguish between courtship ending in marriage and dating ending in NOTHING.
ALL THIS!!!!
Actions >
Facts!!
I don't even start asking questions...if you start moving a way that makes me question whether or not you're being loyal, I leave.
Hello lovely I can introduce you to the same powerful relationship restorer who helped me to recover back my ex fiancee. He can also help you to get back with yours and make your relationship to blossom Forever.
His restoration manifestation process works wonders amicably within few days
±2349155456932⏯❣For more details, wh@tsapp him as soon as possible
The reality is most women won’t get married or find a good man because they are few men who want marriage and to be faithful.
Id honestly rather be single than emotionally damage my self for someone els
@@dailymadness9129 I think most women need to accept the fact that they may never find the type of man that these people on UA-cam are talking about unfortunately. And not because we are bad women simply because there is a shortage of good men even though they don’t like to admit that.
@@BriannaLifeCoach ok u wanna settle?
@@missfefeloves that's what it sounds like she's advocating for. She needs to go and listen to Karyn White's song "I rather be alone."
@@BriannaLifeCoach Your response is completely understandable! I don't think anyone should shame you for your position. ESPECIALLY considering that there are FAR so many channels, books etc for Females about how to better OURSELVES for a mate, but NONE really advocating and pushing this for MEN. Where are the men who want to better themselves for US???
I see what you mean, in other words he turns it around on you and makes you feel you are in the wrong when it's really him who is.
it's called gaslighting
Yes
@@seabreeze4559 Exactly
The same thing the media does to us all the time= gaslighting and lies.
Yes he used to try to flip this s*** on me knowing that he was out here in these streets he have daughters and how can his daughters come to him for advice and he out here being the same way I hope his daughters don't run into a man like him somebody really need to go knock on his door and tell his wife even though she probably ain't going to do s*** about it cuz I'm quite sure she know he out in the streets being messy I should have went to his house and told her even though she don't care
If all women acted the way you correctly recommend, most men would be single. I would not take a day of bullshit behavior. it's energy you can invest in yourself, your career, your friends.
AMEN!
Enough said!
women need their own masculine energy for self-improvement not playing batman detective about a man
@@seabreeze4559 well said!
People who would not take a day of bullshit behavior would not watch a video on this topic.
@@Melitta-zx4sf if you say so lol
Character dictates Action. Action is CONSISTENCY. Consistency of ACTION dictates CREDIBILITY. Credibility determines TRUST. In that order..
That was beautifully worded! I love that and am gonna keep it in my notes to constantly remind me of that.. it’s very true. I’ve made the mistake of being too trusting time and time again because I want to see the good in everyone, but history has shown me that unfortunately not many are as pure intentioned as me and trust should not be given freely.
Love this !!!
@@goddesstreasure well said!!
Trust and respect is earned. I see so many men complaining that women they date aren’t ‘ submissive ‘… hate to break it to them but, in dating no one is entitled to anything.
only a wife is meant to submit and only to her husband
she isn't his wife
Both people ‘expect certain behaviors ‘ in a relationship.
Problems occur when the fantasy of ‘what he will do’ clashes with ‘ what he does/doesn’t do’
Communicate, communicate, communicate
Up front
My question is are you submittable?
The men complaining about women not being "submissive" are being childish. Times have changed, women aren't so reliant on men as they used to be, and no matter what gender both partners should be treated equally. Never 1 person being superior over the other. Relationships take effort from both sides.
@@luckyreithe9734 Why is it that men keep talking about women submitting to them? I don't care if it is a marriage. Look up the definition of submission.
A major example of gaslighting
Facts!
seriously thank you. did it for 35 years...im free now, so happy I cry.
Trust takes years to build,seconds to break abd foreva to repair.....
Manipulative people do not understand the concept of boundaries. They are relentless in their pursuit of what they want, and they have no regard for who gets hurt along the way.
Quality content again Kev, you always have the best stuff ❤️
My fiance pushed me against a shed :( it hurt when ge put his mobile phone against my neck. Hes sorry but I'm scared. I'm not replying to his calls. Hes been made recently homeless. I feel I should help him but am wary?
👍gracias
@@SuperShandy777 prayers for him.. but for you take care of yourself and Don’t answer his calls, walk away far ... because if already pushed you an threatened you.. he will continue... Protect yourself, listen to your inner core, for he could come back an he will make it look like your the mentality an it would be his words against yours ( I have seen it with my sister marriage, glad she divorced him) an it almost happened to me... so walk away, pray for him to seek help with his issues, but for you GET SAFE and out of his /: praying for you and leave him .... be safe 🙏🏼
@@SuperShandy777 Pray that he finds happiness and walks away from him.😇🌺 Don't try to be the savior because the one who saves is God.
Be very careful, because your ex may have made this up and wants to k... you!
I think a better descriptor for that would be psychopathic rather than “manipulative” (which I suppose could also be worse as a descriptor rather than the simple act of “manipulation”… which could also perhaps be termed persuasion or negotiation… the important part being that it wouldn’t be so dishonest or involve mercilessly hurting another person just to get one’s own wants/desires fulfilled… especially temporary ones… i don’t think it is always wrong to be manipulative though… someone setting standards and holding to them could be described as being such) but yes otherwise I agree!!
I feel like im a place holder, like he just holding on to me until the right person or the person he wants is available. Your right im done i deserve better thank you
Just cut off a loser doing this to me . Deserve alot better! Actions speak volumes! If he really wanted you he would of stepped up. ❤️
Your instinct is always right. Leave
Cut him off sis. You're definitely a placeholder. I was one for 2 years and my ex left me when he got his money right then went to chase women with high standards. Work on yourself.💯
My fiance pushed me against a shed :( it hurt when ge put his mobile phone against my neck. Hes sorry but I'm scared. I'm not replying to his calls. Hes been made recently homeless. I feel I should help him but am wary?
Trust ur guts
Trust should be earned always, never just given. That can be deadly. Forget being cheated on. You could lose your life. Guys will gaslight you into thinking you're crazy for being cautious knowing he plans to take your life or kidnap you. Just run if you see signs/red flags.
Exactly. Only a fool automatically trusts someone before they have proven themselves " trustworthy".
Great advice! Listen to your gut. Let friend(s) know where you'll be, what his name is, send them his picture, have a check-in time(s) with predetermined word or phrase so they'll know if they need to get to where you're at FAST! It's sad but we ladies have to be extra careful. The psychos are counting on us to tell ourselves we're being paranoid, not realistic & cautious.
From my experiences when you confront someone on their sketchy behaviors… don’t accept “idk” as an answer. I’ve been in a relationship with someone who never had a reason as to why he was being disrespectful towards me it was always “idk why I did that to you” etc. don’t accept that at all it will only get worse and he still won’t admit to anything or be honest with you.
@Ebabie straight up ! lols . I'm noticing the more we don't accept it & continue grillin' them, the more shit they end up telling you . You can even be playful and upbeat & ask a bunch of questions really fast (while remembering to stay calm) & they will just get comfortable releasing their answers to you . By the end you don't even want the answers !
Your right on this one, Gracias because I went through it an he couldn’t even apologize or say sorry or anything... he didn’t take responsibility for his bullshiit behavior of womanizing and lies, even when he dumped me ( his wife ~ I) for our nieghbor and took her to Our home and gave it to her , deed and all our assets!!!!that jerk ( i could say otherwise.. but won’t here on txt)😡😠
Yes, it works@@_loyal
Vote KEV HICK for PRESIDENT OF HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP MATTERS campaign.
Brother is a Soul Genius, Truth Speaker and Conscious-Innovative Leader of Our Time!💪🏾💯💯💯
Yes.. Yes.. and mo’ yes!! LoL!!
Yesssssss 👍🏾👍🏾🥰🥰🙌🏾🙌🏾❤️❤️
He gets my vote!!!!💚💚💚
A lot of men expect and feel entitled to everything from a woman with out doing the right things to earn that. They feel like all the work they put in running game is the same kind of work that is required to build a real connection.
Killing the goose that lays the golden egg.
Yes!
They say you're running your mouth. You are just Jealous. But a real man makes other women jealous of how good they treat you not make you jealous of another woman. They say all these girls were already my friends...girl just added to social media. Yeah right....Trust is earned and a good man will make sure its not broken. Trust is like paper you can crumble it up and try to straighten it back but the wrinkles will always remain
🙏🏾🕊🧂
Exactly Erica.
When I told him that it still bothered me after he cheated on me and took another woman to NY, he told me that I needed psychiatric therapy cause I need to let it go!
get away from him! He is a user.
Wow I hope you left him…
sorry Keisha....happy T day....blessings to you.
And I hope you said ... *you know what ..you are absolutely correct I do* .... and move on ....please take care of yourself .... He thinks he is being smart but actually he is being disrespectful, insensitive and condescending .. .and there is nothing that says you have to deal with that ...he is trying to break your self esteem (as stated in video)
Talk less... see more ...and move in silence
Be safe 🙏🏾
Keisha D Sounds like you're possibly dealing with a narcissist...you should indeed move on from him, like others have said (if you haven't already)!
Ladies also pay attention to when they ask you questions such as “Do you believe in one night stands, Taking breaks, Or can you love two people at the same time”? It means that’s what they believe in and what their going to do to you and they have another person other than you! Then when you call them out on it they mention trust that they haven’t Earned and will constantly shit on you if you let them!!!! Thanks Kev for this insight 💯💎
If I hear these questions .. that would be last conversation 😂
He is not actually " sorry" if he keeps doing the same shit.
Thank you for this.. I asked my bf a week ago about another girl on his social media and didn't accuse him of anything, just asked a few questions for reassurance. Now he's saying he needs to think about our relationship because I don't trust him 🤔 but how can there be trust without having open conversations?
If you can’t ask, there’s a problem. If he gets defensive, there’s a problem. I hope you’re the one rethinking things now!
WALK.. NO RUN FROM HIM. TOO MANY JEZEBEL SPIRIT OF SEXUAL DEVIANTS WILLING TO DO THE 👿WILL & LIFE STYLE OUT HERE FOOLING PEOPLE INTO THINKING PORN. CHEATING EMOTIONALLY ISNT NOTHING.GET OVER IT. R U CRAZY? HELL YEAH U ARE. LEAVE GURL CAUSE HE IS TRYING TO MANIPULATE U INTO TAKING HIS SHIDD & SHUTTING UP. IF U DID TO HIM WHAT HE IS DOING TO U? SEE HOW CRAZY HE IS. BUT SONCE HE SAID HE NEEDS TO RE- EVALUTE YALL RELATIONSHIP? GO FIND SOMEONE ELSE. LETTING HIM KNOW.SINCE THERE WASNT ANYTHING CERTAIN? BT YALL TWO. U HAD THE RIGHT TO SEE WHOM U WISH. WISH HIM WELL & MOVE ON CAUSE IF U STAY IN THIS HE IS GONNA EAT U ALIVE. & BLAME U.CAUSE U HAD A CHOICE. THE CHOICE TO CHOOSE TO NOT BE VIOLATED. OR ALLOWING ONE TO THINK IT WAS OK TO DO SO.INSTEAD OF U TAKING CARE OF U FIRST!!! U CHOSE TO LET A USER USE U. SIS GET OUT. ITS GOING TO GET WORSE. I PROMISE U.
I agree with you. Maturity means we talk about everything openly, even when it can be uncomfortable. That's how we learn and grow and build connection xx
Don't sleep with him at all till marriage before you waste your emotions on smut
You should respond to him "I've been thinking about our relationship too and I'm going to end it."
They're insisting on trust... but are they trust-WORTHY?
❤❤ Right, signs of a controlling men.
dishonourable men claim to have honour, like liars claim to speak the truth
Yes!! Absolutely 100%!! No one likes to feel like they are on a leash or being taken for a fool either. However when trust is lost, respect is lost too. It goes hand in hand and I personally don't want to entertain a relationship where I don't respect the other person, it's a waste of time.
My fiance pushed me against a shed :( it hurt when ge put his mobile phone against my neck. Hes sorry but I'm scared. I'm not replying to his calls. Hes been made recently homeless. I feel I should help him but am wary?
There is no way I will tolerate what I have been through with the previous person. I move on from that point and no more waste of time. Now I regained my worth and I will only accept the best treatment towards me.
My fiance pushed me against a shed :( it hurt when ge put his mobile phone against my neck. Hes sorry but I'm scared. I'm not replying to his calls. Hes been made recently homeless. I feel I should help him but am wary?
Thank you… I’m going through this right now… I been single for two years and wasn’t looking to date… But, my oldest sister passed away… I was feeling like I was going to break down inside… This man that was pursuing me at work for sometime saw that I was hurt and he put his self in my path… We slept together I feel to soon… But at that time I needed him… now I realize he has a machiavellian narcissistic ego and uses it to manipulate people… I realize he wasn’t after me… he was after who I am… People like that don’t see people for people… They see them for what they are worth to them and how they can benefit from them… I appreciate you so much…Keep being here for us… We need this
Don't get involved or date the men at your workplace.
@@iegal2526 That's not the problem. the problem is the kind of person he is and she unfortunately gave him a chance to do what he wanted, sleeping with him.
Well said!! "It is very natural NOT to trust someone who is SHOWING you reasons NOT to trust him or her". Do not doubt or disregard the obvious no matter what he or she is denying or manipulating. Thanks, Kev!🙏💯💫
I wish I had found your channel before I had a ten year abusive relationship 😞Thank you so much for all these informational videos 🙏🏾
Same
Women, especially African American Women, have been conditioned to be good girls, be quiet, don't make waves. So nothing is said when our intution is screaming something is wrong from the mountains.
Not always but immediate trust is usually a recipe for disaster.
hold it. "while he is Out Doing Wrong, She is the One being Pressured to be Trustworthy." did that for 35 years of him cheating, I never cheated. My children (3) are grown and successful and married happily (except my daughter, but she is smart about men, had her heart broken already....)Im free now, so happy I cry. needed Kev a long long time ago.
It's best to watch these videos when you are single but unfortunately most videos like these are watched when one is looking for answers about dysfunctional or abusive behavior.
Y'know, my Pop would tell us girls to make men earn their keep, sans any explanation of what he meant. And I, for one, never asked him to expound on that piece of advice and knew he meant well. Consequently, I entered the mating game far too trusting and essentially unarmed. In retrospect, I believe what Kev shares with us on his channel is what my dear old dad meant. He was a good person. I miss him
Great video! The one who gives the least always expect the most! The wrong one will meet you in peace and leave u in pieces. With the right one everything is organic and flows like water with the loser you'll always feel confused, upset and on eggshells. When you know better and do better you'll receive better.
Hello lovely I can introduce you to the same powerful relationship restorer who helped me to recover back my ex fiancee. He can also help you to get back with yours and make your relationship to blossom Forever.
His restoration manifestation process works wonders amicably within few days
±2349155456932⏯❣For more details, wh@tsapp him as soon as possible
This happened to me so many times with the same guy. I walked and blocked. After two years of manipulation. Time will tell who’s loss it truly was 👋🏽 Byeeeeee
You are so right that's exactly what I went through in my relationship. I saw the gas lighting and manipulative tactics 😫😂😭 he tried his best to make me believe I'm crazy and that I have mad issues for catching him and asking questions I deserved to know. He tried to shut me up with his anger and by breaking up with me everytime. That bitch wasn't loyal!!😭😂😫😎 I saw right through his bs! He was over friendly with every woman he met. Keeping contact with all of them and pretending he loyal. An opportunist.
That seems like the game now and days… exhausting 🤦🏽♀️
@@bigche5859 yes, alot of these so called men are really traumatized little boys. They play games, some change and some will never change.
My fiance pushed me against a shed :( it hurt when ge put his mobile phone against my neck. Hes sorry but I'm scared. I'm not replying to his calls. Hes been made recently homeless. I feel I should help him but am wary?
@@SuperShandy777 please dont take his calls hun...it means he is dangerous and you should stay away...he can become more aggressive than that over night trust me. It's sad he is homeless but you can not risk your life, your safety, your mental health. Send him money to help but please keep your distance.
I was physically abused by one of my ex's and I cut him off completely. It not my concern what happens in his life, but my responsibility. If he is homeless today and reaches out to me the most I can do for him is send him some assistance but i will continue to keep my distance.
This is also under the guise of 'your being controlling', too! Ladies, don't be lured!
Call a man out on things that don't sit well with you!
Let being single and upholding our standards the norm!!!!
It’s helpful to go into dating already grounded in knowing your own high worth and value. That way when someone tries to manipulate, control and dominate you then it’s easy to flip their tactics on their own heads like say “yup that’s right, I don’t trust you” and “yup I agree this cannot happen and it won’t happen again ....cause I’m out! Peace! Wish you the best with me not in your life! Nope you cannot have a second chance. You showed me you don’t deserve a good woman.” Im not proud to say that I had made a sport out of playing them like the players they thought they were. Now I just would not even justify their behaviors with a response.
This behavior is dangerous because who knows what they’re doing when your not around! Always trust your discernment!
Living double lives while you're in the dark
Thanks for this video Kev. I can admit I was a victim of this tactic by a man. When your "woke" to these tactics you will never fall pray again. Healing & Growth is a wonderful thing.👌🏾😘
Luv it..! This advice goes for ALL relationships. The people in my family are experts at gaslighting ~ They LOVE to piss on you and tell you it’s raining...
yep, after 35 years of him cheating ( I never did) I realize it started when I was young.....done with family members now too.....
You are absolutely right I was dealing with a man just like that he was a cheater I didn't know he was married he was messing with other women he was horrible never brought nothing to the table he still married but he still out here doing the same thing I've been left him alone he got to be the loud one around his friends like he was just horrible and I waste my time and years being with a man like that didn't even know him didn't even know he was going to do all that didn't even know he was married so that's why I had my guards up with these men and these men in Philly is horrible
to me when men are loud or aggressive or both it's the first sign of insecurity for me. Insecurity is loud. Confidence is silent
possible argument for fraud, could possibly sue or more
@@Mindful.Movement.01 bravado is bestial, not manly
@V A they really are
This happened to me and I regret not saying anything sooner. Hindsight...thank you for this!
Assume they are scammers from the beginning, until they prove otherwise.... Saves tons of grief.
Such a good video. I’ve thought of a lot that you said. But hearing it from you confirming it was like music to my ears. Women stop being so nice. It’s like when guys expect immediate reciprocation, your number, your time, your body just cause they feel it’s time. Enough with that entitled bs. Know your worth ladies. It’s not your job to be loved by a dusty. It’s your job to see through the lies and only choose he who is worthy. Peace is so much better than disrespect and abuse. Believe me. Choose wisely Princesses & Queens. Thanks Kev!
A manipulator should be held accountable period . I let my feelings known
Two minutes in and DAMN. "Whenever you ask me questions, it feels like you're interrogating me " I've heard this far too many times over the past six months but now, I'm completely DONE. Yes, I've only received guilt, being told that if I really loved him I would do xyz, recently told that his ex would always be in his life and that he "doesn't know me."
My last one also told me that his ex will always be part of his life, then preceded that 'she is obsessed with him, needs him and does not accept them being apart' then he tells me he is there for her anytime she needs him and she is a troubled girl that always gets into new trouble and he is there for her. All this 8 months into our dating - never a word about it before. Then I brake up with him immediately and he continues with his gaslighting game 'she is not an issue, I don't understand what I said that made you so upset. Yeah right ..... Bye.
This happened to me and then he kept throwing up the I don't trust him every time I questioned something.... I walked away after he pulled the same thing when I called him a scammer.... 😂 and this just happened 2 weeks ago and I needed to see this. Thank you!!!! I felt a lil guilt for awhile but feel so much better about all of it. Thank you for having our backs.
Thank you! Experienced this and now I WATCH for their actions and if they don’t match their words… they don’t have to worry about me! Next!
dread game? it's emotional abuse, including gaslighting if they deny what happened
domineering is not love, it's control
they're trying to create a trauma bond too
It is absolutely disgusting and despicable
Yes! I was looking for this comment. Men are told to cause women to be insecure and jealous on purpose! Crazy!
@@tkkonirc they refuse to believe it's abuse too
Yup husband of 26 yrs caught him red handed this man turned around and said now he can't trust me because I repeated conversations verbatim. Swept it under the rug, dismissed me, and shut me down...All the while never stopped his behavior now fast left him over a yr ago and never felt so good. 30 yrs of dealing with lies and manipulations. Thank Gid for getting me out.
Awesome video!!!! When I called my man out on something he never used the “ trust” guilt thing!!
Like wise I have never used it on him.. he corrected as well as I. You are such a blessing to us all!!!
Thank you Kev for always speaking the truth. You are so right. People need to earn trust. It is sad when someone gives it away because the person is so attractive. Like you said in another video, focus on the core (character, qualities etc) and not the shell of a person.
Yes, Been there, done that...Perfected it to...as soon as I see a behavior that's needing a check and a man may start in on this explanation of how he is just a really cool guy, has a lot of friends, not doing ANYTHING, yada, yada, yada...I'm good, I'm gone and he can have his "friends"...
Usually they get angry when U see the person because they know their wrong and your on to them, follow ur gutt. Pray and use Discernment.
Yes, trust grows when someone proves they can be trusted over time. This video is bom! I'd watch it twice.
You truly have a gift KH, May God continue to bless you, your family and your marriage. May God continue to pour wisdom into you, because you are helping someone’s daughter, sister, mother. 💜
You know what makes this even more sadder all of these guys that are like this as to why we as ladies keep being upset, is because they are being recycled like a pass around and each one of us keep getting what someone else escaped. This why they don’t change. Nobody knows what they’ve done. So it gets recycled.
Thank you Kev!
I have been on to this for a long time but I've never heard it put into words!
One thing I hate the most is having people tell me to trust them! You don't tell me to trust you! You earn my trust just like I need to earn yours! IDC WHO YOU ARE! It's a two-way street that takes effort! That is something that low-key angers my spirit! I feel like it's just because I know what follows! The moment someone tells me to blindly trust them (give them trust that they haven't earned) I know they're about to do some skeezy stuff! I'm not for that, I don't have time for that, and I'm not giving any one time for that! They better go on somewhere with that foolishness! Thanks for spelling it out Kev!
well said ...well said . I truly agree
people need to prove their honor
men used to prove their valor too (bravery)
It goes both ways too. Sometimes, I need someone to trust me until I give them reasons not to. I dated a guy who was paranoid the whole time. One time I went to dinner with a childhood friend (a guy) who was visiting from out of state and also came by my house to see my mom and this guy flipped the entire night and threatened breakup. So no, I would trust you until you give me reasons not to.
Exactly
You speaking All Facts sis
He is 💯 right. Beware that guy. He gets away with it because he offers all the exterior aspects of a “relationship” but it’s an empty shell the guy uses for manipulation and often abuse. To cut my story short: when he could no longer attempt to psychologically abuse me he tried to salvage my reputation.
These guys seam like the solution especially when you have been dealing with soft core players or half available men but that guy is a real predator
It’s so much better to stay single!! Relationships/sex partners is way to complicated
I just had this situation happen to me… I started asking question and felt hyper vigilant.
It was giving me anxiety.
I walked. Throw up the deuces fasho ✌🏾
I used to be stupidly naive and say I trust until I'm given a reason not too. Now, I know trust has to be earned and I'm ok with being called rigid
It's the worst thing,when a guy gets caught cheating or want to get back at his girl!he then scapegoat another female that has nothing to do with what he has going on! But if the girlfriend allows him to keep getting away with things,he will continue and at that point that girl will stay fighting or arguing with other females over a waste of space!!
Wowwwww I’m going through this right now, you saying exactly what he said. I can’t be with you without trust…nigga you texting women, still talking to your ex wife inappropriately and now he’s the victim Lol. Thought I was in the twilight zone…Thank you so much for shining light on this situation you have truly help me.
Sometimes we know it already. However we need to hear it from others to make up our mind.
One word BYE
Lordy the men are going to be mad keep going keep doing this, I approved 100 percent.
Thats right kev and I don’t forget crap neither that’s true
Thank you so much for this video-it’s a good reminder!!!! ❤️
Yep, Narcism sure does suck
I really appreciate you speaking so simply and frankly about these topics & tactics I've seen my whole life but have always over complicated them by over explaining. That's a red flag as well. Anyways, thank you so very much. Have a blessed life.
Trust is everything without it the relationship will not go any where
moving on respect yourself and do not
allow others to take advantage of you🤴😇✨❤️🙏
I went through this. (A 53 year old ladies)...." Come back when I got over my trust issues".
I LOVE THIS DUDE! HE TELLS IT LIKE IT IS!
Manipulative person pretend to be trust don’t to earn it.
Men like this one in this video is exactly why i prefer to be patient and wait until God blesses me with one.. I will not settle for anything less.. A man that loves you and respects you will not give you an automated to feel any sort of way that threatens your relationship or your trust for them NEVER! I love these videos.. I needed this video.. Thank you! 💯💯💯
I’m so glad u made a video on this. I’ve noticed this tactic yea s ago while in my 13 year relationship. Dating while single now, idc about losing no loser! I’m gon speak my mind and call u out on all ya BS and I peep EVERYTHING. They don’t like me bc I catch them in lies and call them out. I will not and cannot be manipulated. I been there done that and won’t do that AGAIN! 💯
Awesome video!!! People also gaslight you about the status of the relationship.. lead u on and then treat you like you’re crazy if you develop emotions or etc. this is a great video. ‘Don’t turn your eye to the bs!!!’
You are a whistle-blower for men. Thank you Kev💋
number one i like the fact that your videos are primarily informative, not allot of personal talk etc. second well wishes and good business to you/us 👏🏾
100% FACTS
I appreciate great men willing to have open and honest conversations about what's REALLY going on... how much dysfunction can you stand before SOMETHING changes. Change comes from within one's SELF.
Siri, play 'Dont Trust No ____" by Khia. 😂😂
These are the things that should be taught in school!! I wish I would have known and understood this when I was a young naive girl when I ended up marrying a player, manipulator. It definitely caused a lot of damage. I tolerated bullshit for 7 years and eventually ended the marriage. Unfortunately attracted more players along the way until I finally was able to recognize a good man! I thank you for your channel!! I truly hope the young women out there will listen to what you are teaching!!
This video is so TRUE!! This confirms I did the right thing by walking away from a guy. He would only text during work hours. He was NEVER available on the weekends. I go to his Facebook, he was on video out to eat with a woman and trying to hide his face in the video. I called him out on his behaviors and he said I appear to be a woman that accuses men without knowing the facts. He really tried to get mad at me for saying something. I ran for the hills!!
WATCH OUT FOR TOXIC PEOPLE WHO DISPLAYS BREADCRUMBING 🚩👀
Manipulators are just that… manipulators! On point…have heard all of this…been played, manipulated & gaslighted…. walked away!
Whew! Right on time! I just walked after 3 and half years. He was the one messing around yet tried to blame me for his decisions while throwing ol’ girl in my face. I think I’m good on the dating thing for a minute.
KEV YOU ARE THE BEST. I recommend you to SO many women. Thanks for being so honest, helpful, logical and honorable. 😇🥰🤩
Seriously one of the best channels on UA-cam. You have such a gift to share this information both in depth & straightforward.
Oh my goodness you read my situation to a tee. I am so glad I paid attention so I could leave that buzzard. Thank God.