RED FLAG that WOMEN MISTAKE for a GOOD THING | SIGN HE’S A PLAYER OR CHEATER

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  • Опубліковано 10 вер 2024
  • This video is sponsored by LetsGetChecked. Get 20% off your tests with code KEV20 at trylgc.com/KH
    RED FLAG that WOMEN MISTAKE for a GOOD THING | Dating mistakes the women make
    Women often thing when a guy is all over her that it means he is really into her. They often mistakenly think that a guy likes them if he shows intense desire for them. They take it as a sign that man wants them specifically when he makes sexual advancements towards them. This is often a huge dating mistake that women make when dealing with men. Some men are very aggressive and it can seem like a sign that they like you but it is not. Sometimes it’s a sign that a man lacks self control and is more likely to be an unfaithful player than men who know how to control their urges. When men are super aggressive it’s a red flag that they are likely players and cheaters.
    For dating advice go to girltalkwithguys.com
    Dating red flags
    Dating mistakes women make
    How to tell if a guy likes you
    Red flags women miss
    How not to get played
    How to tell if a guy is a player
    Signs he’s a cheater

КОМЕНТАРІ • 331

  • @KevHick
    @KevHick  2 роки тому +32

    This video is sponsored by LetsGetChecked. Get 20% off your tests with code KEV20 at trylgc.com/KH Know your status and protect yourself. Don’t end up with something you can’t get rid of test driving each other. There are many other tests available as well.

  • @miamonique_
    @miamonique_ 2 роки тому +430

    Men who are Exclusive and controlled in their own sexuality is so attractive. That’s a high value Man.

    • @joannastoeva906
      @joannastoeva906 2 роки тому +6

      What?

    • @Betterme4lf
      @Betterme4lf 2 роки тому +5

      Absolutely

    • @erehistruth2356
      @erehistruth2356 2 роки тому +18

      I completely agree. That is attractive to know that a man doesn't have to try to "hit" every female he sees. A man. That can control his urges.

    • @kimberlyhayestaylor1785
      @kimberlyhayestaylor1785 2 роки тому +11

      I love that type of man. He wants to take time to get to know you. He listens and enjoys laughter and engaging conversation. He loves courting you-the old fashioned way. 😍
      It’s highly pleasurable and extremely attractive.

    • @adinkoert5815
      @adinkoert5815 2 роки тому +2

      a high value man does what he want, whether he's exclusive or not.. he's uncontrolled by the opinions of others.

  • @Love86229
    @Love86229 2 роки тому +168

    As a woman who's been abstinent for 5yrs, I find it repulsive when dudes are all over or constantly telling me they want to "take my virginity" because I've been abstinent for so long or only want to talk about sex. It's disrespectful and shows how poorly he values and himself and how much he lacks godliness and discipline 🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️

    • @chelsieromero4874
      @chelsieromero4874 2 роки тому +6

      👏👏👏💯

    • @themoonbleu627
      @themoonbleu627 2 роки тому +1

      Girl a man would be scared to say anything like that to me invest in your appearance more bc they are comfortable disrespecting you not trying to impress you so level up you have to be more than a virgin to be appealing

    • @themoonbleu627
      @themoonbleu627 2 роки тому +1

      Like how do they even know chile something not adding up

    • @Love86229
      @Love86229 2 роки тому +9

      @@themoonbleu627 clearly you didn't read this completely. I'm not a virgin I'm abstinent (look it up if you don't know what it means) and mu appearance has NOTHING to do with it these dudes being exactly who they are 🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️ I look fabulous every day, if a dude has no standards and low self esteem he's going to treat you how ever because that's just what he does to EVERY woman he encounters. Looks excluded

    • @Love86229
      @Love86229 2 роки тому +3

      @@themoonbleu627 how do they know? Simple by conversation....that's how you get to know ppl by talking and asking questions. And please don't refer to me as chile

  • @aamia3769
    @aamia3769 2 роки тому +172

    It took me one time. My first sexual encounter was with a man who was overly pushy and didn’t ask me if sex was what I wanted. I was 18 and I had never had anyone challenge me sexually before. After this encounter I have not got close to another man yet. I’m almost 21 now. Any man that comes to me that is overly aggressive and sexually suggestive is instantly blocked.

    • @erehistruth2356
      @erehistruth2356 2 роки тому +5

      Amen. I feel the same way. We have to place more value in ourselves as women.

  • @enmodelife
    @enmodelife 2 роки тому +200

    The other part of the problem, is that these types of men are thoroughly convinced that you should actually feel *FLATTERED* by their physical energy towards you (vs. annoyed or repulsed). I had a man actually get upset at me for not acknowledging/reciprocating the "chemistry" he was trying to establish on dates 1 and 2. Needless to say, that was a red flag for me and there was no 3rd date.

    • @essedarden4690
      @essedarden4690 2 роки тому +3

      wow, this is so closely descriptive of someone I recently met ✂ ... where do you live? I wonder if it's the same guy!

    • @MaryLouise
      @MaryLouise 2 роки тому +6

      The real big problem is that there are so many women that accept this kind of man and will even applaud his disrespect and lack of a brain. It's exactly why she ends up with absolutely nothing. The bottom line is there needs to be some work done on the INSIDE to change that mindset to start valuing one self!

    • @MaryLouise
      @MaryLouise 2 роки тому +3

      @@essedarden4690 🤣

    • @traceylennon1204
      @traceylennon1204 2 роки тому +1

      OMG EnMode You better speak the gospel about these men thinking we should be FLATTERED!!! 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾💯💯💯

    • @traceylennon1204
      @traceylennon1204 2 роки тому +2

      @@essedarden4690 😂😂😂 There ALL "the same guy" (of sorts)!!

  • @seabreeze4559
    @seabreeze4559 2 роки тому +52

    if he does it so early, he does it with EVERYONE

  • @miamonique_
    @miamonique_ 2 роки тому +141

    Exactly I am immediately turned off by this. Especially with social media. If he sends me anything inappropriate I assume he sends them all meaning any woman. I don’t let that make me feel special.

    • @jayc5756
      @jayc5756 2 роки тому +9

      Exactly

    • @cindeed4422
      @cindeed4422 2 роки тому +13

      Making you feel special is a manipulation tactic. You have to be able to spot it when you see it.

    • @Noname19980
      @Noname19980 2 роки тому +6

      I had a guy send me a D-pick when I told him no for the 3rd time then 1 week later he sends me one and it was small and disappointing 😒 I ended up blocking him

    • @rachelwilliams8009
      @rachelwilliams8009 2 роки тому +3

      I call those types "Hound Dog"

    • @MaryLouise
      @MaryLouise 2 роки тому +2

      Exactly! I met this guy who was nice looking and muscular. He said all the right things, opened my door, and well mannered. We started talking on the phone and suddenly the conversation went sideways. I said sideways because when a dude wants you to keep sending him pics you are not interested in getting to know me. When I get off the phone I hear my alert go off. Guess what he sends me?
      Yeah! A penis pic. Block! Like how many women do you send your penis pic to? Total turn off!!!!

  • @angelicaangel2624
    @angelicaangel2624 2 роки тому +183

    The more forward and confident a man is around you at the beginning says he's not nervous or worrying about impressing you. It's a red flag.

    • @yogib1442
      @yogib1442 2 роки тому +8

      Absolutely!

    • @rose-cq5xp
      @rose-cq5xp 2 роки тому +7

      10000%

    • @Noname19980
      @Noname19980 2 роки тому +16

      You are so right I remembered this guy telling me he was a little “shy” ( yeah right) but had no problem keep touching me and trying to French kiss me on the first date 🙄 I later found out he beat on his other exes, cheated on all of them, he tries to get women to buy him expensive gifts, he lies a lot and not good at it and he also sleeps with under age girls smh

    • @tomriddles7472
      @tomriddles7472 2 роки тому +4

      @@Noname19980 All you women do is complain about men who dont want y'all. Explain the men you turn down & hurted they feeling that wanted you. Karma is for all of us.

    • @droppinggemies
      @droppinggemies 2 роки тому +11

      True but I’m just as worried about the guy who wants to impress me because he will pretend to be someone other than who he is. Later on their true colors come out and they get comfortable. This is a red flag too

  • @arselia8499
    @arselia8499 2 роки тому +21

    A man with no self control or respect will sleep with your best friend, sister, mother or daughter; whenever he gets the opportunity. Wonderful message!!!

  • @TribusCaputCanis
    @TribusCaputCanis 2 роки тому +10

    This sounds like “He isn’t yours, it’s your turn” if he’s on you the first day.

  • @cindeed4422
    @cindeed4422 2 роки тому +110

    A man with self control is one of the things I look for. If he’s too aggressive and manipulative right off the bat, to me he lacks all self control. That’s a huge red flag. When I see it, I move on quickly. Most of the time I’m not wrong. Some of these men went on to be straight up salvages with other women. Just like you said Kev, “That’s just who they are”. I totally see that now. Recognize the game. You won’t be so hurt by these men later.

    • @candacecasey5634
      @candacecasey5634 2 роки тому +5

      not only that for me a guy who is THAT agressive I tend to think that he has no respect for my boundaries. I move slowly and intentionally. If a guy is all over me from the beginning like Kev says I see that as a sign that he is that way with everyone. I also hate it when someone approaches me but lets me know they are in a relationship. Boy, bye I am not intereseted in being anyone's " side chick".🤷‍♀️

    • @cryptonesto2095
      @cryptonesto2095 2 роки тому +2

      Yea and I’m pretty sure the guys with the self control are in your friendzone good job 👍.

    • @angelanjoroge8643
      @angelanjoroge8643 2 роки тому

      just my thought exactly ..i see the manipulation i am out! no sec chance!

  • @ladyofspa
    @ladyofspa 2 роки тому +31

    Early sexual advances is one form of love bombing. Women that have immediate sexual chemistry often is a sign he wont meet your emotional long term needs. Your judgment will be off when strong sexual chemistry is present. Will be blinded,redflags ignored. Never works with that guy.

    • @Traumatised311
      @Traumatised311 2 роки тому +1

      Unfortunately alot of women first got physical after 5,6 months relationships
      Their bfs still cheated nd narc abused them n gaslighted them

    • @ladyofspa
      @ladyofspa 2 роки тому +2

      @@Traumatised311 Yes seen exactly what you describe...but slightly different issues... but for the same painful reasons and results are the same. Both rooted in childhood wounds. Attraction and mate selection is repeating familiar family dynamics, so that's why same women have same outcomes. You attract whats familar, and the more immediate and intense the sexual attraction is a clear sign its gonna be more unmet needs... cause unresolved wounds will get same type person and trigger your traumas. Hes your childhood neglects in the flesh. Gotta heal own stuff first.

    • @PowerfulSista
      @PowerfulSista 2 роки тому

      YOU ARE DEFINITELY ON TO SOMETHING WITH THIS COMMENT🤟

  • @msve3730
    @msve3730 2 роки тому +154

    Self Control gets freind zoned
    Lack of self control gets in our hearts, head and bed
    Us women can be so damn backwards sometimes.

    • @HoneysuckleRose813
      @HoneysuckleRose813 2 роки тому +11

      You said exactly what I was thinking. Its true. I am guilty of those actions

    • @cryptonesto2095
      @cryptonesto2095 2 роки тому +5

      Exactly, I got friendzoned by girls who initially was attracted to me, all because, me the man, was supposed to develop a plan to get her in my bed within a certain time frame smh 🤦‍♂️ Women these days...

    • @MaryLouise
      @MaryLouise 2 роки тому +1

      @@cryptonesto2095 - Wow!!!! 😱

  • @gabrielamartiniuc6322
    @gabrielamartiniuc6322 2 роки тому +9

    Women are flattered by men all over them? Those women are BROKEN. If a man comes onto me sexually within the first few weeks he’s OUT. That’s a turnoff and a red flag. I’m attracted to men that have self control !!! I am immediately turned off when a man makes sexual jokes; even on a first date or second or third. Period - it’s disrespectful and RUDE. Being wanted so bad is GROSS. I want to be RESPECTED. Period. A wise man acts respectfully and does NOT come onto me sexually !!!!!

  • @Perfectlyradiant_
    @Perfectlyradiant_ 2 роки тому +233

    Kev’s advice is like medicine.. Doesn’t taste good going down. But in the end it’s going to help you.

  • @LydiaSantiago
    @LydiaSantiago 2 роки тому +61

    I dropped the guy I’m talking to after watching this video 😂

  • @avatoast
    @avatoast 2 роки тому +53

    It's crazy because I've always been turned off by guys like this, but I could never put my finger on why. Thank you for explaining it to me.

    • @annebos4634
      @annebos4634 2 роки тому +4

      They're toddlers trapped in adult body's, basically

  • @MsJuly-ts8cj
    @MsJuly-ts8cj 2 роки тому +31

    Welp.....here it goes . This guy I was dating was on Tic toc displaying inappropriate behavior towards women and I said wait 1 minute. If I was enough for him then He would've have self control and have respect for himself , and the women. I blocked his butt didn't even tell his butt I saw the comments. He doesn't have to change..I changed the direction I was dealing with him. Flipped my hair and never looked back.

    • @SharlenesJourney
      @SharlenesJourney 2 роки тому +7

      That’s definitely a red flag men be exposing how they’re through social media. I peep this with this one dude his posts and repost are so toxic it definitely shows how he really feels

    • @danyelgarcia3689
      @danyelgarcia3689 2 роки тому +1

      YESSSSSS!

    • @erehistruth2356
      @erehistruth2356 2 роки тому +1

      Amen

    • @trinityqueen2461
      @trinityqueen2461 2 роки тому +1

      Good for you!

    • @feliciaallen6228
      @feliciaallen6228 Рік тому +1

      Good for you!

  • @jayc5756
    @jayc5756 2 роки тому +31

    Exactly! They lack self control

  • @elikorn7418
    @elikorn7418 2 роки тому +32

    Something tells me your videos are very helpful for women that grew up fatherless or with no relation with their father. I thank you.

  • @S.Lee8
    @S.Lee8 2 роки тому +132

    Yes! The chemistry was strong. Especially the sexual chemistry. He accepted me saying no but he kept saying. It's going to happen and I'm not using a condom. I really liked him but I had to cut it off. My Intuition was screaming at me

    • @Perfectlyradiant_
      @Perfectlyradiant_ 2 роки тому +46

      That’s actually scary.

    • @avatoast
      @avatoast 2 роки тому +45

      Tf?? He actually thought that taking away your consent to sex and protection was somehow attractive? What in the hell?!!

    • @bratzsnoopy
      @bratzsnoopy 2 роки тому +21

      What a rapey thing to say

    • @LV2308gmail
      @LV2308gmail 2 роки тому +11

      Girl you should block him if you haven’t and not look back !!

    • @sharmamathurin544
      @sharmamathurin544 2 роки тому +8

      Huh girl you made the right decision!

  • @msve3730
    @msve3730 2 роки тому +23

    You just gave the DaVinci Code as to why I keep getting cheated on with every guy I chose to date. 😔

  • @womenwhodate7643
    @womenwhodate7643 2 роки тому +19

    What a good reminder. It's actually even hotter if a guy is attractive but isn't "easy", a good talker with good looks who doesn't want to go to bed right away is HOT. The good stuff will come later, but if he wants to know you better before it's only a good thing.
    Thanks! ❤️

  • @CrystalDatingCoach
    @CrystalDatingCoach 2 роки тому +31

    He enjoys your company...it's not ALL about Sex.

  • @grey_wolf_tg2235
    @grey_wolf_tg2235 2 роки тому +23

    The car clips are actually growing on me. It's you speaking to us from a location, rather than in a vacuum.

    • @Perfectlyradiant_
      @Perfectlyradiant_ 2 роки тому +1

      Yeah I like these better as well. It’s like a casual vlog style.

  • @munirahlewin4694
    @munirahlewin4694 2 роки тому +6

    I think about my ex husband and my new guy and the differences are amazing! The ex did not have self control at all and it showed when he cheated on me with his current wife and how he tries to cheat on her with me. SMH
    New guy is a 180 degree change from my ex and I absolutely love and appreciate this about him.

  • @kailakatsaidthat9130
    @kailakatsaidthat9130 2 роки тому +68

    Loved this message! Self control and self preservation are so attractive in a man. Letting me into any part of yourself before you know me is a huge red flag. We all have to use discernment out here:)

  • @iktt7287
    @iktt7287 2 роки тому +12

    Oh no boo don't touch me like that bro especially on the date's don't give him your address

  • @miikaela1
    @miikaela1 2 роки тому +45

    oh my goodness...... THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH. I just took the time to remember the first dates with some of the guys that I think or have cheated on me. and that is exactly how they behaved...... and yes I did take it as, oh my I must be so desirable to him and he is so absorbed. of course he wants (only) ME. I have never been so wrong in my entire life. thanks a lot!

  • @roxydee1452
    @roxydee1452 2 роки тому +31

    Hmm, this reminded me of a time I met a guy at a day conference. He seemed really cool, but as the afternoon went on he became increasingly physically "imposing" towards me. On the train heading home (we caught same line), he really amped it up, trying to rub against me and telling me how wild I was driving him. The train was packed and I had done nothing other than be friendly with him and was dressed in conservative corporate attire. I knew I looked nice, but most guys would not act that brazen at a lap dancing establishment! I told him sternly and quietly and in no uncertain terms to get off at his stop or I would cause a scene. Luckily we had not exchanged numbers.

    • @danyelgarcia3689
      @danyelgarcia3689 2 роки тому +2

      Wow, I'm so encouraged you had the strength and courage to address this situation with such boldness. Had you ever had to do that on a train before?

  • @thedreeffect1821
    @thedreeffect1821 2 роки тому +17

    This hit hard!!! Lack of self control is a huge problem. These days, there many options and lots of accessibility for these options. At 40, I'm realizing dating is a huge turn off. All I see are red flags in everything. I stopped collecting red flags and retired of Build-a-Man a long time ago. I crave positive energy, similar vibe, someone who can teach me something other than his ego, communication, with comprehension and mature emotional interaction and reaction.

    • @thornless9073
      @thornless9073 2 роки тому

      I'm 30 and I quit on Build-A-Man, too 🌹🥺

  • @sierra_santiago
    @sierra_santiago 2 роки тому +33

    I think this goes both ways.... Some guys will come on to a female real strong on a first date and as soon as she gives in to his advances and has sex with him, he'll judge her and penalize her for it. I think its because he feels like there was nothing special about him, she will do that with anyone.

    • @danyelgarcia3689
      @danyelgarcia3689 2 роки тому

      Yes more than likely they are testing you to see how quickly or how long it takes to get you in the bed because that determines your worth to them and shows how much you value yourself. They are also taking a guesstimation on how many partners you may have in a year to total up how many men you've been with. If it takes a month they figured that there's a possibility you could average 12 men a year.

    • @cryptonesto2095
      @cryptonesto2095 2 роки тому +4

      If a man sees value in a woman, he sees value in her. It doesn’t matter if she sleeps with him the first week or the 52 week. A real man wants to know that you bring something to the table other than sex..
      1)Can you cook ?
      2)Do you offer to go half on date?
      3)You want him to impress you, but do you want to impress him ?
      4) Do you feel your a good woman who deserves a good man ?
      Instead of worrying about him. Focus on qualities you have as a woman and what you can offer the right man..

    • @danyelgarcia3689
      @danyelgarcia3689 2 роки тому +5

      If you sleep with a man sooner than later before building your relationship with him and making sure you both bond and connect on a mental and emotional space then your value in his eyes goes down. It absolutely DOES matter. Ladies, ladies don't ever listen to a man that tells you it doesn't matter when you have sex with them that it could be as soon as a week, two weeks , a month three months xcetera, best believe they are judging you by how quickly they could get you in the bed.

    • @cryptonesto2095
      @cryptonesto2095 2 роки тому +1

      @@danyelgarcia3689 You must be married and you must have a whole list of women who listen to your advice and found a husband. I know couples who got married in one to two months knowing each other because they both knew what they wanted and what each other was bringing to the table. You can wait a year before giving it to him, if you have nothing to offer him other than sex, you have nothing to offer him other than sex. Plain and simple...

    • @danyelgarcia3689
      @danyelgarcia3689 2 роки тому

      @@cryptonesto2095 I'm sorry, I'm not sure if you're referring to me and telling me that I have nothing to offer than sex.

  • @Reneesaidit
    @Reneesaidit 2 роки тому +56

    I had to keep telling a guy to stop trying to kiss me. He still went in and kissed my face and forehead instead. I was so bothered. I told him I was abstinent and not into casual ses yet he kept coming on strong saying I'm too beautiful and he couldn't help it. The first date was the last and he got blocked.

    • @thelookout5802
      @thelookout5802 2 роки тому +15

      The first date and he was doing all that? goodness. Some men have no control or respect..

    • @Noname19980
      @Noname19980 2 роки тому +9

      @@thelookout5802 girl I had a guy kissed me ( French kiss) right in the middle of me talking and I was mad af

    • @Reneesaidit
      @Reneesaidit 2 роки тому +5

      @@Noname19980 Sounds like this guy. He would start looking at my mouth then move in and flip my hair. Savages 😂

    • @Reneesaidit
      @Reneesaidit 2 роки тому +5

      @@thelookout5802 right, this guy kept saying he's never disrespected anybody in his whole life. I told him outright he was being disrespectful in his actions but he was delusional.

    • @Noname19980
      @Noname19980 2 роки тому +5

      @@Reneesaidit did we date the same man? Cause he said the same thing ( not word for word but close)

  • @desi4u1
    @desi4u1 2 роки тому +6

    I’ve been saying this for years! If he can’t control himself..it’s a no go.

  • @jayc5756
    @jayc5756 2 роки тому +30

    Kevin is so wise with these shits man. FR

  • @sherriestephenssnow4154
    @sherriestephenssnow4154 2 роки тому +8

    You are very wise. The world needs more men with these type beliefs/values . Love how you support integrity and character in a man!💕

  • @jessicamerced9116
    @jessicamerced9116 2 роки тому +22

    This is true! I've made many mistakes in my life with men... This is one of the first changes I made.. no more obsessive men, no more love bombing types. This video helped me solidify what I believe. I am being much more careful when I decide I want to date again 😊

  • @zero1188
    @zero1188 2 роки тому +7

    truth is when a man dont make a move, the girl then says, he is not interested or they lack chemistry and connection. or he get put in the friendzone. self control only works when a women perceives a man as desirable. she will wait for a man she imagines is sexually desirable already but not the man who she is in the middle about

  • @ctylr5627
    @ctylr5627 2 роки тому +10

    This is one of the top 3 things I look at when making a selection, but usually his conversation will tell where his self discipline is before he even gets a chance to touch.

    • @danyelgarcia3689
      @danyelgarcia3689 2 роки тому

      What are the other two things you look for?

    • @ctylr5627
      @ctylr5627 2 роки тому

      @@danyelgarcia3689 if he’s attuned, mature and self disciplined (mainly with body…). And really, if he knows how to hold a serious conversation about life and not just bedroom activities :-/

  • @amandagarcia9022
    @amandagarcia9022 2 роки тому +17

    I appreciate this video, Kev!
    Last year, I encountered a lot of men whose comments and behavior seemed to be intended to throw me off balance.
    I thought it was odd and confusing, but I didn’t know them that well and I thought they didn’t know me that well.
    Now I’m learning more about what their behavior was telling me all along. (I also learned you don’t have to give people time to grow to respect you. The people who value you will show respect from the get go. They want you to be comfortable, not uncomfortable. And those are the ones you should prioritize).

  • @jodianm7642
    @jodianm7642 2 роки тому +23

    This really gave me something to think about.

  • @patriciamcdonough8505
    @patriciamcdonough8505 2 роки тому +9

    Wow this so true. Thank you for sharing this. What ever happened to waiting and getting to know someone. Morals and values. God bless you.

  • @coraadams6117
    @coraadams6117 2 роки тому +12

    It's disrespectful to grope in public for me. .

  • @goddesspluto2627
    @goddesspluto2627 2 роки тому +18

    this literally just confirmed the feeling I got after a first date with a guy when he pulled my face in and started making out with me super quickly. I was thrown off by it and my friends kept saying it's a good sign and he finds you attractive. I'm like no, he wanted to get to that level quickly, without allowing tension to even build up. No thank you. Now I know

    • @Noname19980
      @Noname19980 2 роки тому +3

      Your friends most be fast or something because anybody even a man can tell you like kev did he only wanted you for sex I know cause I been through this once at 18 and I should have cut him off but I was listing to my friends and ended up in a 6 month situationship

  • @analyticalchick3064
    @analyticalchick3064 2 роки тому +5

    "You don't know where I'm going with this"
    I actually did.

  • @dadost467
    @dadost467 2 роки тому +20

    Spot on Kev👌
    Little things we fail to understand

  • @Natashea
    @Natashea 2 роки тому +1

    That’s a huge red flag to me, he should be in awe of me before he tries to touch me. He should be afraid to fuck it up. Being handsy that quick is sign of disrespect

  • @yogib1442
    @yogib1442 2 роки тому +10

    Great video Kev!
    Here I am thinking I’m stuck up. No I have standards and your energy is off putting.

  • @lisahowell6701
    @lisahowell6701 2 роки тому +3

    Thanks for these tips cause some young one's either don't know or have wisdom and older women who get flattered by a younger man also need to be wise!!!

  • @Iam_msdee
    @Iam_msdee 2 роки тому +25

    Yes indeed, Kev, you hit the nail on its head with this breakdown on self control. I have definitely dealt with this in the past (in a long-term) relationship- in addition to the issue of lack of self control- the ex used s-x as a way to control women.
    Let me put this in perspective, when I say s-x as a way to exert "control" over the women he was with- I mean that he had an agenda - s-x her real good to reap the benefits (receiving money, gifts, etc).
    Thanks for sharing your nuggets of wisdom 💯👍 excellent work

    • @chelsieromero4874
      @chelsieromero4874 2 роки тому +4

      Disgusting 😑... Not you the experience with the ex.

    • @thornless9073
      @thornless9073 2 роки тому

      Yup. But fortunately for him, I got to help him get what he obviously wanted, which was some dxck. See, my narcissistic rapist ex had raped the ex before me and went to jail and took a 🚂🚃🚃🚃, and came out hating women more than ever. That fool feels like women owe him 😒😒😒

  • @tuezmoi
    @tuezmoi 2 роки тому +18

    Does anyone else says "what's good" when they click on Kev's videos? :)

  • @floragreen6399
    @floragreen6399 2 роки тому +4

    if he has no control with you (like chemistry high af !!) well he has no control not just with you. that’s easy to forget cause it’s such a nice situation to be in and you think he’s just like that with you but nah

  • @gingerlemon865
    @gingerlemon865 2 роки тому +12

    Your videos have helped me THE MOST with my love life than any other coach on UA-cam. I wanted to say thanks

  • @SunLeader0000
    @SunLeader0000 2 роки тому +2

    I have never felt special because of a man's sexual advancement . I always saw it as a man's natural desire. However ,I never saw it as a man's lack of self control. Makes complete sense and I like and appreciate that information.

  • @ValeriaGonzalez-xc1ri
    @ValeriaGonzalez-xc1ri 2 роки тому +3

    Wow u hit this on the spot. I met this guy at work, he was charming, smart, always so respectful with everybody, had a college degree and to be honest he seemed like a down to earth dude never the less, he didn’t look like a player. Well well, I found out later that he was hitting on many girls at work, but before that, he invited me to get a drink and had some food, intuitive as I was, I was like whats your purpose with all this? I was, “is this whole thing you doing, is it to go to bed with me?” And he said “yes” Then he started saying how attractive I look and that I seemed like a cool chick, moral of the story, looks are deceiving and I’m glad I found out right away he was a player.

  • @bratzsnoopy
    @bratzsnoopy 2 роки тому +25

    What makes a woman susceptible to this kind of love bombing behavior? It is feeling like she lacks attention or validation. It could be from childhood or just not feeling seen. Fill your own cup, ladies. This way, you won't feel so carried away by the intensity they're giving you. When you heal you will actually get creeped out by it.

    • @danyelgarcia3689
      @danyelgarcia3689 2 роки тому +3

      Yes I agree please write affirmations that you say morning noon and night. This will begin to change your perspective on yourself. It's working wonders for me so that when I go out I don't feel insecure or desperate or like I'm lacking anyting but it actually helps me feel the opposite because there are so many other things going on in my life that's fulfilling then not having a partner when I want

    • @FreePalestine123-b1x
      @FreePalestine123-b1x 2 роки тому +6

      I think it's an amalgamation of factors that contributes to this behaviour. Learned behaviours, low self esteem, media and pop culture that glorifies and promotes casual sex, placing a huge amount of emphasis on superficial and shallow qualities over deep, meaningful and value-based ones. The messages we're consistently subconsciously being fed are that if a man doesn't want to have sex with us, or show us he does, we're undesirable and unsexy. These are false beliefs that are harmful to both men and women! The advent of dating apps making it increasingly easy to find people to "hook up" with, investing very little time, energy or emotion in building true connection, not to mention the ease of jumping from one person to the next, resulting in a wave of "walking wounded" individuals projecting their emotional baggage onto others. Childhood trauma or dysfunction resulting in anxious / fearful avoidant type attachment styles, which dictates the type of folks were attracted to... Could go on...

    • @danyelgarcia3689
      @danyelgarcia3689 2 роки тому +3

      @@FreePalestine123-b1x Wow, have you done a paper on this before? This is very insightful a more rounded picture. Do go on.

    • @FreePalestine123-b1x
      @FreePalestine123-b1x 2 роки тому +3

      @@danyelgarcia3689 😂 ahh thanks! No, never done a paper but feel like I could tbh! I feel really passionate about the topic.

  • @distinctivelyherhi7952
    @distinctivelyherhi7952 2 роки тому +17

    THIS!!!💯💯

  • @freespirit8635
    @freespirit8635 2 роки тому +1

    Found your channel 2 weeks ago -- definitely one of the best videos that I've watched to date! When I think of the men in my past of whom I have the most respect, it's the ones who (*upfront) withheld any aggressive flirting or advances. I would argue that this character trait, if anything, would add to the colloquial "high value" of a man. Despite those relationships not working out, I hold them in high regard til today. Thanks for all you do! 👍🏾

  • @TheBabyface716
    @TheBabyface716 2 роки тому +4

    Wow that’s deep and very true. My last love interest was like this… he had no self control at all. I know he’s like that w other women too

  • @beayates6228
    @beayates6228 2 роки тому +13

    Thank you for telling us like it is . God's Blessings to you and your family for the important messages you bring to us.

  • @erickahaskins3178
    @erickahaskins3178 2 роки тому +3

    💯💯💯 it’s a huge turn off 👎🏽

  • @candacecasey5634
    @candacecasey5634 2 роки тому +4

    I have never seen a guy being too " handsy" as a good thing but I am the type that has issues about people intruding my " personal space". If anything I take a guy being too agressive sexually as a sign that he is not really interested in getting to know me as a person. This is great advice but I guess when a woman is a bit more " reserved" is just not necessarily as likely to feel " sexy" just because a guy keeps touching me . In fact If a guy is too agressive that for me is a total turn off.

  • @tatisloveoth
    @tatisloveoth 2 роки тому +5

    So much windom in your words . Thank you for telliing in on these lowlives.

  • @lastofthemohicans4665
    @lastofthemohicans4665 2 роки тому +5

    Dear Kev, I wish I had your advice many many years ago. I could have saved so much valuable time. Thank you!

  • @msdavis0326
    @msdavis0326 2 роки тому +6

    Girl, that man for the streets😒

  • @Mary-lb3lv
    @Mary-lb3lv 2 роки тому +2

    Well, I married a man and this rings true for sure. I would say on the 3rd date he was really over the top with his advancements and I found myself tamping him down. Unfortunately, he cheated and found it impossible to settle down and be faithful early on in our marriage.

  • @jayc5756
    @jayc5756 2 роки тому +9

    WOW! Very Interesting 1. But that does make a lot of sense.

  • @shaunaboo961
    @shaunaboo961 2 роки тому +1

    Good point.. I’ve had to stop speaking with men because of this but never thought about it this way. I was just turned off and stopped. Thanks Kev

  • @louisasummers9430
    @louisasummers9430 2 роки тому +1

    Very True! I wished I knew this from a man years ago. I feel so stupid over the mistake I made. It will never happen again. God Bless u

  • @jessk660
    @jessk660 2 роки тому +5

    Omg I needed to hear this today 😬 makes so much sense

  • @RS-ct6iw
    @RS-ct6iw 2 роки тому +5

    Or I can be a form of love bombing. I had guy that could not keep his hands of me. But was all an act and he turned out to be a narcissistic and once he had me where he wanted he literally cut off sex.

  • @juliannesharpe3066
    @juliannesharpe3066 2 роки тому +2

    Lack of self-control and irresponsible...

  • @suzan-x3i
    @suzan-x3i 2 роки тому +11

    Mad respect to you

  • @shukriaawale1099
    @shukriaawale1099 11 місяців тому

    Damn I have fallen in this trap many times and it all ended up in dust…wow I wished I saw this video earlier it would’ve saved me heartaches. Thank you!

  • @d.s9798
    @d.s9798 2 роки тому +2

    Kev your face at 4:31 has me weak! "He doesn't know you". Facts! 😂💯

  • @juusgee6658
    @juusgee6658 2 роки тому +3

    This is a great topic and many women including myself have been misled by these behaviours. Thank you for this advice.

  • @thecliff4670
    @thecliff4670 Рік тому

    As an older woman, I know you speak the truth in all of your videos.

  • @lisahowell6701
    @lisahowell6701 2 роки тому +1

    I definately agree a man should control himself with a high valued woman and for himself also to protect himself!!!

  • @CC-br9qg
    @CC-br9qg 2 роки тому +7

    crazymaking sociopathic behavior.

  • @iris916
    @iris916 2 роки тому

    I would never get with a guy who’s super handsy right away, that creeps me out

  • @Gkrissy
    @Gkrissy 2 роки тому +1

    I figured this red flag out in my 20s it’s like heck no. When he said going from shaking your hand to shaking your bed lol 😂 I fell out but everything he said is facts.

  • @Capricorn-mt1ke
    @Capricorn-mt1ke 2 роки тому +9

    It's not what a man will do it's up to the woman to not allow men to disrespect you. It's not cute at all little girls like attention.

  • @michellesheridan1028
    @michellesheridan1028 2 роки тому +2

    Great video, just what I needed to hear! Thank you so much. It all makes sense now.

  • @flatandsplat
    @flatandsplat 2 роки тому +3

    You're advice is awesome. Thank you so much. Every time I watch one of your videos I feel stronger and more assured.

  • @zenmama4160
    @zenmama4160 Рік тому

    Very good advice. You’re right; I had no idea the direction you were going with the initial point, but I’m sure glad you did. Thanks again

  • @gwenlee9562
    @gwenlee9562 2 роки тому +1

    I feel insulted. Lack of self control and a lack of respect.

  • @ibstayfly
    @ibstayfly 2 роки тому +1

    I've never been in a relationship but good advice for when I get out on the dating scene which will probably be never because the breed of men out here are sad
    Thank you so much for this. I'm learning everyday from these videos

  • @millag93
    @millag93 Рік тому

    Kev, I feel so stupid. I allowed myself to feel "special" when he messaged me constantly online and bombarding me with compliments. Luckily we didn't sleep together but I developed feelings and he doesn't want anything serious.
    I felt so "special" and exclusive, this is actually stupid. Probably he wrote such compliments to many other women... I feel stupid because it's partly my fault. I have so huge need for external validation, I always fall for those type of men. I'm so stupid sometimes. :( It hurts

  • @Melissatheartist
    @Melissatheartist 2 роки тому +2

    Kev, I am beyond grateful for you. These words.. divine timing.

  • @shantellfox4472
    @shantellfox4472 2 роки тому +1

    This deserves a standing ovation👏👏👏👏👏👏

  • @B.I.-EIO_macdonald9786
    @B.I.-EIO_macdonald9786 Рік тому

    Trust is earned. And its learned. It takes time.
    I don’t need a man who can’t control himself because men can be big problems of you make that tie too soon.
    Know who you’re fng with.

  • @jen_counihan
    @jen_counihan 2 роки тому +1

    Kev Hick’s you are so 💯 Again!!! You’re videos & coaching have helped me grow and get through painful situations with men and see the truth! I know God has more for me than to get played. Thank You for helping me see my feelings from facts.❤️🙏❤️🙏

  • @JM-cp6ei
    @JM-cp6ei 2 роки тому

    So good. Such valid points. Not just with cheating but picking a man who makes good life decisions in general.

  • @liliththefirst1
    @liliththefirst1 2 роки тому

    Wow I learned a whole 'nother lesson today....NEVER knew this. Thx

  • @CAROLYN143-8-9
    @CAROLYN143-8-9 2 роки тому

    THANK YOU YOUNG MAN, YOU ARE A BREATH OF FRESH AIR. I APPLAUD 👏 YOU FOR SPEAKING FROM A HEALTHY MINDSET. I HAD TO SAY THIS TO MY EX-FACTOR WHO IS LIVING LIFE TOO RECKLESS FOR ME. THE CARNAGE/BODY COUNT IS WAY TOO RISKY & NOT KNOWING HIS/THEIR STATUS IN THE LAST 10+ YRS 🤷‍♀️ HELL NAW 👀.

  • @Proverbs31Ministries222
    @Proverbs31Ministries222 2 роки тому +2

    Not to me that's a red flag. Run run run. Hes a player

  • @TheNisiu
    @TheNisiu 2 роки тому +2

    Yeah I went out on a date with a guy who talked about sex & kept grabbing his package for me to see. I was utterly disgusted that he thought this behavior was ok on a 1st date! It said so much about him. Needless to say it was cut short & I never saw his @$$ again.

  • @movementofbelonging
    @movementofbelonging 2 роки тому +1

    Ah yes, nice correlation! (And maybe there's some kind of subconscious metaphor going on about self-control with you in your seatbelt during the video. lol.) Thanks for what you do, Kev

  • @inconceivabledark
    @inconceivabledark 2 роки тому +4

    Good advice again.

  • @deshauncalloway2008
    @deshauncalloway2008 2 роки тому +1

    Great information as always! It makes sense. Thanks again for your words that strengthens us to see value in ourselves and demand it