The Biggest Marketing Claims... That Turned Out to be Completely Untrue
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- Опубліковано 29 чер 2020
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Simon's Social Media:
Twitter: / simonwhistler
Instagram: / simonwhistler
Simon's Other Channels:
TodayIFoundOut: / todayifoundout
TopTenz: / toptenznet
Biographics: / @biographics
Visual Politik: / @visualpolitiken
Highlight History: / @highlighthistory
Geographics: / @geographicstravel
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not going to spend money on scams like that. Now that merch, put a link in the video description and people may buy it :)
Simon the hack man
VPNs are not as safe as they claim
Video posted an hour ago and this comment posted 8 hours ago. Time travel confirmed.
Simon does a pretty good american accent
"This is so long Danny" says there guy who interjects nonsense every other sentence. Hahahaha love you guys
Wouldn't change a thing. XD
Simon needs Enzyte. Allegedly!
@@sandrastreifel6452 He needs to smile more? Sure!
Exactly. He needs to account for his tangents!
The point is that Simon knows his own delivery style. He looks at the script, sees it is 5 or 6 pages long then factors in his own asides, comments and "Bada Boom Boom tchsssss"'s and says "This is going to take hours!!"
Business Blaze, where you can literally watch Simon's sanity slowly deteriorating in quarantine
Some pity, please. He has a baby daughter, and is probably sleep deprived.
@@imouse3246 he is definitely sleep deprived
@@hawkie7632 Perhaps it's the cocaine, allegedly?
@@imouse3246 alegedly
Cocaine jokes are half of all jokes in this channel
Fun fact:
Danny makes the scripts long because Simon pays him in biscuits per word.
I hope Simon's channels never go away. We have everything, history culture, top 10 lists, biographies, comedy. Like. Damn.
Business Blaze is just a sitcom of Simon and Danny trying to troll each other.
With Sam in the background quietly winning every event.
Sam: 'Hello Darkness my old friend...'
Simon calling us his little legends is something I didnt realize I needed.
Find Anton Petrov, he starts off all his video's with "Hello wonderful person!".
Yes..it made my little morning 🌄
LegenDARy. Now that I've found it I can't live without it.
Something doesn't add up Simon.
24:22 - "The game was up in March 2005..."
24:47 - "Three years later (he) is found guilty ... and sentenced to 25 years in Jail." So in 2008...
25:14 - "On appeal, the sentence was reduced to 10 years, ... And he was released from prison in 2007." So his sentence was reduced to 10 years, and he left prison a year before he was sentenced.
Either Danny wrote the script wrong, or Simon read it wrong. My money is on Simon reading it wrong. But it was funny to hear. Sam, please roast Simon for this in a future video.
Noticed that too. I was gonna say Simon.. But he was so excited about reading it, I think it was the script.
More basement time for Danny
I looked it up and apparently he was initially convicted in 2008 and released in 2017 after his appeal.
His mom was also involved and originally got 2 years which was later reduced to 1 day. She did have to forfeit almost all her assets.
I was just minding my own business, playing this video in the background, when I looked at the screen and made eye contact as Simon said, "Or am I Peter." I threw my phone away from me and had to perform an exorcism on it before I could resume this video. Congrats Simon, you officially freaked out one Peter. Well done sir.
My friend played the Business Blaze "allegedly" drinking game this episode, and now has alcohol poisoning....
(just kidding- I don't have a friend)
I know. What friend. Oh, and I like the game
There were 13 "allegedly" in this video (yes, I count them for fun). That's enough to make anyone sick if doing the drinking game.
Khm, he allegedly has alcohol poisoning!
Not anymore. He died from alcohol poisoning.
😂😂😂😬
I love how Simon has descended form being an egg presenting TopTenz and now he's a memer who hacks the planet.
I hack the universe.
I was thinking more Simon goes from host of info videos to a raging coke head having skits moments on youtube. It's probably my favourite character progression ever :D
Simon: Ya know, I think I'll have some extra salt on my KFC.
Everyone else: Uh, Simon, that's not salt... that's cocaine.
Simon: EVEN BETTER!!!
...I guess a “fried chicken rib” is a UK thing? Never heard of someone ordering one.
I've never heard of anyone eating chicken ribs. Really confused by that
@@LeglessWonder unless it's another word for chicken breast, then it kinda makes sense.
Edit: never mind, what the hell is a chicken rib piece, usually if you order breast and thighs the breast tends to have the ribs attached to the breast.
I’m so confused!
Thigh
Rib
Leg
Breast
Maybe rib is wing? It’s illogical, I know. But that’s the only one left.
I'm so glad I'm not the only one.
In the1980's KFC sold the most delicious Sticky BBQ Ribs. Wrapped in thick silver foil. Even MORE finger-lickin' tasty than the chicken! Bastards discontinued them in the late 80's!
Simon’s true identity has been revealed
*A hipster hacker*
ALLEGEDLY
Jordan R.....For all we know, he could be a hackster hipper! (ALLEGEDLY!)
so... a hapster? hipcker? facebook account hacker?
And he eats his family... ALLEGEDLY!
You just say that to induce us to buy Surfshark VPN... ALLEGEDLY.
Every time my grandparents got me a toy that required batteries, there was a pack of batteries with the gift
What did your parents give you for Christmas? To your grandparents for adoption?
Your grandparents were absolute legends!
"North America and Canada"
You heard it here first, folks, Canada is it's own continent.
Isn't it?
@@johnkobilarcik4449 Unsure if you're trolling or nah. Sarcasm doesn't translate well in text.
@@dokuujin1851 I was 100% kidding.
@@johnkobilarcik4449 oh good. Was trying to give you the benefit of the doubt lmao
I mean I knew the Frozen North was different....I just didn't know it was THAT diferent XD
In his other channels simon gets steadily less formal, I suspect that they will all be like business blaze in 10 years
Omg...I noticed that too but thought it was my imagination
Owen Davis He is, they are... I give it 18 months, tops!
The Times: “Solar-Powered British Man Arrested In Prague After Trying To Trade Wife And Daughter For A Bucket Of KFC”
Or an 8 ball of blow.
Allegedly...
Finger lickin good
Getting a dead battery with the label “toy not included” isn’t funny. Yet my dad thought it was. I do miss it through now.
Now I’m crying during the blaze
Its not funny, its hilarious.
I think your dad is my dad's soulmate...his favorite gift to give is multiple empty boxes stuff inside each other.
Or, a cartridge in a bare tree 😂 I'll let you come to your own conclusion as to what kind of cartridge he attaches to the "bare tree" (which is just his fancy way of saying "stick")
This is Peter, reporting in. I can safely say, I almost pissed myself there 😂
Excellent. It was actually you I was thinking of specifically Peter.
Business Blaze Simon thinks about Peter all the time!.... allegedly
14:56 Today I learned: Danny celebrates Christmas on 15th March (when saint Nicholas AKA Santa Claus) was born.
I'm Peter! Always hope that they call out my name when they do the fake "hello " gag but they never had until now 😊😊
You're welcome. I've hacked your mainframe.
@@brainblaze6526 Allegedly.
Me too, I was almost asleep vaguely listening to the video and then immediately woke the fuck up to my name being mentioned😂😂
Sam: as a massive Trekkie, I need a meme for when Simon says “Business Enterprise.”
Hell yeah!!!
"Morehead Honda. What a difference Morehead(more head) makes." an add for a car dealership that ran for years.
I had to present evidence to a Grand Jury. So, I presented all the information I had then looked at the jury and said, "allegedly." I felt the Blaze within!
I watched the whole preroll like a legend should.
Teacher's pet...
Insert Homer shouting " Nerrrdddd " meme .
Always beginning to end 🖤
It is a little ironic Simon is complaining about the ad to content ratio on broadcast TV.
Anyone else tripping on their own shlong?
"They got this url just to troll me" plugs it every episode
Maybe he himself got it
Simon is just a legend that likes serving up Rick rolls.
maybe he wanted to get it for a Rick roll and Danny beat him to it
Pretty sure Danny started Simon's Only Fans page.
Im starting to realize each channel Simon has is a fraction of his different personalities. I really love this
“Go KFC. Should I do that as an American?” Says it exactly the same 😂
Allegedly.
Don't know why, but when he starts selling the old scripts i want someone to cast the pages in resin and make things out of them, like a business blaze coffee table that's its own coffee table book.
That would be cool.
I totally want none that could be his new merch
I love how this show started a bit carefull with some business related stories and now has evolved into "Simon's shitshow 'cus it still makes money and I need to use my basement monkeys for something"
allegedly
...and we keep showing up, giving him that sweet, sweet watch time.
*Devolved. Let's be real here. Business Blaze is a trainwreck. And it is GLORIOUS.
I'd love a blaze about the male enhancement industry more generally, but that might be hard to monetize.
"North America and Canada".
Canada, now in the South Arctic.
He just read whatever Danny puts on that paper.
Allegedly
sounds about right, eh
I’m fully convinced that Danny knows absolutely nothing about Canada
@@brooklynnedagnone533 You're probably right.
New drinking game- take a shot every time Simon say "allegedly"
Well I'm wasted... "Allegedly"
RIP Kim
Are you trying to pickle our livers?
I light up my bong every time Simon says "blaze" - allegedly
Two minutes in: I'm off to hospital now.
"Dont sweat my little legends", i snorted my drink at that little nugget!
Was your drink coke?
Today I found out: Simon has a wife and daughter.
I found out about the daughter today yeah. He talks about his wife all the time, tho her actual identity is a secret.
But yeah, his family is why he lives in Prauge/Czech, and not Britain.
Can’t go wrong with a Czech girl unless you ruin it yourself 👍🏻
Vitek Harvey or unless their visa expires and they have to leave the country.
@@alexander-mauricemillamlae4567 I couldn't tell you haha. I just know he's said in his podcasts that he lives in Prauge with his wife and she's Czech.
@@alexander-mauricemillamlae4567 I'm from the Chicagoland area of Illinois. Yeah, brexit is a bitch ain't it? Hopefully he has a green card through marriage and gets to stay with his family. I had a friend that kept dating czech and eastern european girls visiting the usa. It never ended well. She'd just go back home and the relationship ended.
Petition for Simon to devour a bucket of KFC while blazing
I think he would have to stop eating for days, if he did 😂. From the way he talks on podcasts there's a reason he is that skinny
Matt Stonie just recently did it - 13,500 Calories in 45 minutes!
As if he needs more ways to make Business Blaze hilarious and entertaining.
SIGNED.
Signed
KFC’s ‘finger lickin’ good’ ad axed due to corona virus outbreak. Australia. So sad.
That’s sad, I eat KFC once a week when I’m there, because it’s only that and Maccas in the area until I get back to Brisbane
Hahaha
KFC did this everywhere the
quote was still in use, but in the US, it is expected to return during a more appropriate time. I guess a Super Bowl ad or something big will be planned for that special date. It's the American way!
ua-cam.com/video/Vn9BeN8NBaA/v-deo.html
So I love all of Simon's videos and channels but this is my first business blaze. Oh my god this is glorious. I always loved when he lost the professional edge a little in the other videos but this is just him jumping off the deep edge and I'm crying from laughter. Truly magnificent!!!
ok but can we talk for a moment how sweet it was that Simon immediately spoke about his wife for positive traits to pass onto his kids. what a romantic
“Im not poor” ... smashed that dislike button 🤣
I just press skip after 5 seconds and save a few bucks
Legend.
Totally poor! Thanx adblockplus
@@brainblaze6526 Allegedly.
So, typing into the void with ideas as usual
- Silk Road one (mentioned in Pam Am video)
- Egregious corporate lobbying/astroturfing
- Innovations from the porn/AV industry that are now commonplace
I'd watch these blazes. Commenting to boost your comment on the list
comment!
Signal boost
Yassssss dude
Can I post multiples to give a higher boost???
3:05 - Chapter 1 - Buckets of healthy goodness
10:15 - Mid roll ads
14:00 - Chapter 2 - Duracell lawsuit lasts longer
19:35 - Chapter 3 - Smiling bob and the massive steaming erection
25:40 - Chapter 4 - Formula for failure
- Chapter 5 -
"I'm just taking off my socks, it's hot"
Things are getting hottter!
hmmmmmmm, here are the notes i've taken, I'm not as good as Brian but I'll help where I can
Simon hacker man: 30 seconds
Tech: 2
Surf Shark: 5
Script slap/tap: 4
Whooper: 1
Mario: 1
Censored swear words: 35
allegedly: 11
purch the merch: 1
"oh no he didn't": 1
roll safe: 1
"so that was a fucking lie": 2
the food at home: 1
"am i flying jack?": 1
"if you are watching your coarbs": 1
ghanan pallbearers: 1
cocaine: 2
bada bum bum tssssss: 4
simon singing: 1
ruinday.exe: 1
hackerman: 1
"oh f*ck yeah, hack it": 1
simon calls peter jackson "James Cameron": 1
mafs: 2
fedex man: 1
Running from your lies: 2
I"m so run down: 1
P-P-P-POWER: 1
surprised pikachu: 6
Harold: 2
painting of clinton: 1
Happy mask: 2
mystery book section: 1
Salad fingers: 1
Heman: 1
and way too many d*ck jokes for me to count
You forgot his allegedly count lol
@@joshbunton6424 ooh, and Salad Fingers!
@@joshbunton6424 no that was the 8th thing on their list
Edit: and their post hasn't been edited so we know they didnt change it after your comment
@@dudeman5303 thank you I somehow missed it
@@joshbunton6424 no problem! Tbh i felt like an asshole for even mentioning it, i hate being "that guy". But then again I said it anyways, so that doesn't really change the fact that i *was* , in fact, "that guy".
The most offensive thing you have every said: " dr. pepper tastes kind of nasty"
It is the nectar of the gods!
He shouldn’t have said “kind of”. He should’ve said “really”. Go whole hog!
The Dr. Pepper army is going to have to make him disappear.
Smash that dislike button!
Tastes like prune juice mixed with chemicals & piss.
(And yes, I Do know what that tastes like ;)
Lmfao... “fortunately they have my wife for that”
I've watched many of your videos on many different channels and this is by far my favorite.
I think it's really neat that you do the high end professional engineering videos and then ALSO do down to earth chill vids like this. Most content creators don't do both.
Simon is stalking every one of us. This is why he's the host of every channel on youtube.
Only the good ones.
Literally jumped from sane Simon on Biographics to in house sun glasses wearing Simon on business blaze. Amazing content on both ends of the sanity spectrum 😂😂
And in between.
Same but from Geographics. XD
that thing about Duracell actually clears up a lot of confusion i had as a kid. I was shopping in a flea market and i was at a vendor that imported things mostly from china and they had Duracell batteries with the energizer bunny and i figured it was just poorly designed Chinese knockoff batteries (which they probably were) but there was actually a reason for it.
Ok Simon, lets see a Blaze on all of the ways a person can choose to enter the after life. For example, be made a diamond, a mushroom suit, the Capsula Mundi, or just wind up at the Body Farm.
I legitimately thought I was having a stroke, twice during this one. Sam's editing/memeology skills needs to be licenced as a deadly weapon!
8:33 "The order is clear: thigh, rib, leg, breast."
Me: People eat chicken ribs??
I was wondering that too.
No, at least not in KFC. They have Breast, Thigh, drum, wing strangely fingers(I don’t think chickens have those) but never seen rib
Maybe it's a thing in Prague...
People eat chicken ribs and chicken feet outside the US. I'd rather not, but my family sure doesn't mind 🤢
8:42 How do they cut up chickens in Europe? Are the ribs separate from the breasts? What happened to the wings!
_(also legs are clearly superior)_
Simon, love your work it gives some good laughs
To clear up what was up with the script: when describing relationships in research papers you can say, “there is a casual relationship between x and y”, and this is used to inform the reader that the after-mentioned relationship has yet to be proven without having to explain this.
0:01 Simon getting his TopTens Channel back (Circa, 2020, Colorized)
I’m a simple person. I see Simon, I smash the “like” button:)
Absolute legend.
Allegedly
LOL omg I love your humor! 'And unfortunately Danny has passed away..' 🤣
Levels of love for a channel:
1) New & fresh, binge every single video like a tube of barbecue Pringles.
2) Await each new video with feverish excitement, clicking the instant it appears.
3) Waiting, savouring each moment before you click on the video - Knowing that after you click, there are just a few precious minutes of joy until the long wait for the next video.
I've reached 3 now - Love you guys!
Simon: Family first then K....lets just say they're equal
At least he remembered to stop calling his daughter "it" 💯💯💯
the only thing eating pizza every night for five years sounds like a natural remedy for is being alive
You can get UA-camRed for free just by replacing the "You" with "Red" in the URL.
Worked for me!
I didn’t realize that’s what I was doing this whole time. Nice
I've been watching your videos on your various channels for years now and I really like this new, more loose version of your videos! Don't get me wrong, I like the way you stay professional in your other channels, but it's nice to see who you really are and I imagine these videos are more fun to produce. Either way, I absolutely appreciate all the work you all do! Keep up the good work on all your channels brother!
That beard is going to be down to his feet soon
Like a scrawny George “Corpsegrinder” Fisher
If he doesn’t end up like Gandalf I’m unsubscribing 😆 remember his 🥚 head ? 😋
You shush you his beard is amazing
Kevin no I mean I want it to grow huge so long he could wrap around his head 😆 I was just wondering if anyone remembers it 😋
Two days in a row?! What did I do to deserve this? And how can I do so again?!
If lying set your pants on fire advertisements would be much more fun to watch. 🤪
Watching the intro skit after the "AM I RIGHT, PETER?" og BB injoke adds a whole new level of comedy
So, who is going to tell Simon The Hobbit and Lord Of The Rings trilogies were directed by Peter Jackson and not James Cameron?
Panthror ...my guess is that it will be some nerd!
I don't think he cares.
Someone who has time to waste?
Poor Danny, he just wants some human interaction Simon, but you had to go to the pub!
Allegedly. He may be perfectly fine with Sam for all of his social interactions.
It’s not like Danny has much time for human interaction in the basement anyways. #FreeDanny
"Moron them", nice sponsor call out.
they must cut KFC differently in the UK, I've never seen where you can order a "rib" at a KFC.
I was very confused by the chicken rib comment.
Back when I was a kid (USA btw) there were commercials for now defunct Pioneer Chicken chain about chickens not having 3 breasts. Also, I had an ex-brother in law who worked at KFC and he said yes, left breast, right breast, center breast. So even in the US back then they cut the breast into 3 pieces.
another awesome video!! I've noticed these do get a bit more crazy as they go on, I check the time it was released, see how long Simon has been in lockdown. ALSO towards the end when he throws on the shades, he looks like a slightly older Jewlz from What Culture.... the shaved head and beard
Best ad ever 😂
Yeah, Simon. It was Peter Jackson who directed the Lord of the Rings films, not James Cameron.
I haven't seen any films from those two and yet I still know what films they were behind.
I love Simon's "tappety-tappy! I am a hacker!" thing.
A few years ago I out regular tv on for my son, who was used to Netflix. When a commercial came on he didn't understand what was happening on the show and what it had to do with the previous scene!
We be Blazing
I sure am
Saaaaaameeee
ua-cam.com/video/mp2sVIWSdjo/v-deo.html
"The order is clear: thigh, rib, leg, breast."
"thigh" -- understood
"rib" -- ????????????
"leg" -- understood [even though chicken "legs" are actually of made up of two parts: the thigh (upper) and drumstick (lower)]
"breast" -- understood
Are chicken wings not eaten in the UK, or is this what you're referring to as the "rib?"
I came to the comments to ask the same thing. Wtf is a chicken rib @ KFC?
I worked at KFC and we did not sell "ribs" 😳🤷🐔
certainly, he meant wings? The ribs are part of the chicken breast, unless it's a boneless breast, and who orders boneless chicken at kfc?
Some pretty cracked chicken there... Or Danny was high on coke when he wrote that...
@@monicaheisz9797allegedly!!!!
You should do a video on things that the FDA has approved, some of the stuff will leave you begging for a hospital but you won't have a runny nose
I think you need to Merch the phrase "Don't sweat my little legends"
Some people look cool when they wear sunglasses inside...Simon just looks like a blind person. ;p
Ryan Roberts ......yeah, a cool blind person!
Perhaps it's the sunglasses coupled with the mindless keyboard bashing...
No one remembers Dr. Demento? That's who I thought of.
@@katiekane5247 yessss
@Skunk Ape did you see Stevie's last album cover?
Niether did he.
"Completely Untrue"
ALLEGEDLY!
Simon: Nothing is sweeter than KFC, except my wife and daughter.
*Hannibal Lecter intensifies*
Simon: Not to eat, just that I love them.
*Hannibal Lecter sadness noises*
You gave the best description of xmas ever!
"It's a straight line of doing nothing." Favorite quote from this video.
“Dr. Pepper Tastes Nasty” *Screams in Texan SMASH THAT DISLIKE BUTTON!
SMASH IT
You should be drinking Big Red.
Dislike button: SMASHED!
My grandma used to keep a Dr. Pepper 2 liter in the fridge. She didn't drink a lot of soda/pop so, half the time it was flat. But I everytime I smell it, I think of her, one of the loveliest and most intelligent women I've ever known. I freaking love it because of that alone.
I'm very tempted to join in that Dr. Pepper smash the dislike club.
I worked in America in the early 1980 s, and naturally wanted to try Dr Pepper ,as I'd heard of it , but it isn't sold in the uk where I live. So I tried it ... god it's awful ...it tasted like bad toothpaste . Maybe ( allegedly) it has changed over the years . I hope so .
One of my favorites. Thanks man!
The intro is brilliant - Simon, you are a legend!
Simon: Family vs KFC... Let's just say they're equal
Also Simon: *finally remembering to not call his daughter "it" after months and months*
Are they really equal Simon? When was the last time you forgot what to call KFC?
When you dunno if its gonna be a boy or girl for 9 months, and then get surprised that day, the compulsion to keep calling the kiddo it is hard to break.
@@disbeafakename167 XD I would poke less fun if it's not something that comes up across most of the stuff he does. Especially the podcasts. So much baby "it" in the podcasts.
Tbh I'm kind of here for it. Human babies aren't done yet when they come out. The shoe fits.
Never has there been a better intro to one of your videos and I have seen hundreds of hours of your content across 4 different channels. Youre a Legend.
Legend
This was without doubt one of the funniest, most entertaining blaze videos I’ve seen and I chalk it up to a seemingly irritated and/or “less fucks giving” Simon, 😂👍🏼 Great stuff in here, I GENUINELY “lol”-d a few times 😂👍🏼
Simon in sun glasses made me want him to cover all of ZZ Top's repertoire
When simon's supply of catnip runs out he's going to on a rampage, falling down style.
For the love of civilisation, keep him high!
Simon's imitation of an American accent sounds basically just like Simon with a slightly silly version of an English accent.
So true. He tries to add the Rs he never normally says. If only he just did it the way he adds all the non-existant Rs he adds to other words it might actually sound convincing.
Marco Meijer ...so,,you mean that it actually sounds like an American?
The Ministry of Silly Talks.
@@remlatzargonix1329 beat me to it.
You ever hear someone try to imitate your accent and go, "Oh god, is that what I sound like?"
LOL the smiling bob commercials were hilarious.
Simon, consider this an intervention:
Never get rid of the beard but trim that thing once in a while!
Best opening ever.
Damn you cut in Salad Fingers and I had imediat flashbacks to this ingenous horrifying videos...
Please do a Video about P&G. There is probably a lot to blaze.
Salad Fingers is magnificent.
yeah, like the war in nicaragua
I genuinely think Simon makes advertising more fun than anyone else on UA-cam 😂