Wow! You just sum up my life in this video. I didn't know there was a name for feeling numb not to feel pain, grief, brokenness, lonely, and sometimes unloved. When I tried to explain to a few friends how I felt. They simply said I was too needy. So, I closed myself up physically and emotionally. I went through so much after my ex-husband left me for another woman. I raised my 4 children by myself. That was 26 years ago. I've been bullied at work, been through horrible sickness, and cancer. So after going through all of these horrible things and my few (3) friends telling me I was playing the victim or being needy, I just became numb. I lost 3 nephews under the age of 32 in the past 3 years. Losing my father, aunt, and dealing with so much grief, it pushed me a little closer into isolation. I exist. I don't live life. I feel like a robot going through the daily motions. I also take care of my 81 years old mom and my 54 years old brother with dementia. Sorry, it's such a long comment. I usually don't comment, but tonight, the video spoke about me. There are things I'm grateful for my 6 grandchildren and my adult children. And God, without Him, I probably wouldn't be here. Thank you for sharing. ❤
I think your friend are disgusting! Hope you ditch them and love yourself like the best friend you ever had. You have plenty of reason to feel what you have felt. What selfish ugly people they were to treat someone suffering and grieving so terrible. Wish I could give you a hug.❤
We matter to God, for sure, and we can carry Him along with us wherever we go! The Holy Spirit will be a friend truly closer than a brother. You are so very valuable to Him! I loved reading your comment-regardless of the length! ❤️ I agree with Aya! Ask God for new friends…He will do it! Wish I could hug you too!
I’m so happy you rely on our Heavenly Father for support, his words of wisdom and love are real and alive when we read the Bible plus it gives us hope for our future ❣️
You spoke right to my heart. I have felt numb, invisible, and lonely for the past few years. It’s good to know that I’m not alone. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
I'm from Ireland. I've lived alone for years. Watching your videos has inspired me. I got the courage to move house at 67,look after myself,start to wear make up again. I'm not invisible any more. Yes life isn't easy but I now have motivation. You are a beautiful woman. I'm so glad I found you. Thank you.
Unresolved grief is the silliest thing I have heard. Grief is the price we pay for loving someone. I wouldn’t change that for the world. My daughter would be 51 next month. She died when she was 7 from leukemia. My son was killed 11 years ago. The pain never goes away. I just have more time between the pain as I get busy with life, but it hurts just as much when ithe thoughts creep in. I have a saying on my wall “life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. Its about learning to dance in the rain.” Hope this helps someone.
I worked in the Medical Profession for 53 yrs and one of my nurses gave me a wonderful hand drawn picture with the following words.....If you are going to walk on thin ice ....you may as well Dance...there is a beautiful Ballerina drawn in this picture!! I just adore this saying!!!!!
Susan, you have a way making everything seem OK. I know I just went through the motions when my husband died. My daughter had gone to prison and six weeks later my husband died. I was still working at the time and raising my 15 year old grandson. I was 65 at the time. My daughter was in prison for 26 months and I continued working until I was 75. My grandson has been with me since he was born and I love him to pieces. At 75 I retired and just three months later the pandemic hit, so I was at home with my grandson for all of that time. Two years ago, my legs decided to not hold me up. I went to the hospital and was there for 5 weeks. I had back surgery while I was there. I've gotten to the point, I don't care what people think of me. I'm now 80 years old and I have really aged in the past two years, but it's OK. I'm doing the best that I can. I use a walker when I go out, but not when I'm in the house. I just feel happy to be alive. People have no right to be insulting to you. You are very beautiful and you will be a great asset to your son's festivities and his wedding. If I could walk better I would feel more confident. Thank you for the words of wisdom and encouragement that you give us every. And give that handsome Desi a pat on the head from me. Thank you. Sending Light and Love to you and all of your subscribers. ❤🙏❤
Maureen, thank you for sharing your story with us. I have not had an easy life from the "git go" and for so long I felt like I was the only one not living the "Father Know Best" life. I was completely wrong. Stupidly, as I have worked and grown older, I thought I had gotten wiser. In someways, yes, in others NO. I am estranged from my only son, I have a husband with the beginning stages of Alzheimer's, and an autistic daughter who will never live by herself. I wonder why I have ever thought it would be easy? Anyhow, I do join you in your appreciation of Susan. I really do look forward for to seeing you and Desi every week. I love when you document you successes also! You give me realistic hope!
God bless you! You have been a huge blessing to your family. Now it’s time to focus on your health and happiness. Decide what brings you joy and dive in❤️
Yes, however this blossoming of creativity, stems from a spiritual root! ❤This is one of the very best videos that Susan has created for us! Deeper, higher, wider, is the eternal Love of our Fathet God!! Susan, you are an inspiration!! Thank you so much, from a divorced woman who tried to avoid her feelings by numbing out with food and by putting on this thin mask of superficially!! We free ourselves beyond survival into thriving!! God bless you! ❤
Anna, I am so with you. If you can, go for a walk, talk to neighbors, meet someone for lunch or whatever. Do that a couple of times a week. Please stay connected. You are not alone in this, I assure you. Much love to you and blessings too.
@stellajohnson5301 thank you for replying! It's nice to know others are there and understand. I do engage with seniors around my area and the occasional neighbor, but I'm really missing the personal connections! Life takes us thru trials. I'm a believer and know I am never alone. But we all crave connection to humanity. God bless you and your journey 🙏
As the others have said, you are not alone! I'm feeling the same way. I need to take all the experience, strength & hope and apply it to myself. I know how hard that is. With love.
I'm so glad I watched this video today to learn that there are others out there like me. I am feeling that way now, too--numb. I had a couple hours to finally get out of the house today, but, lacking motivation, I couldn't decide where to go. I ended up not leaving the house after all. I'm in my early 60s, have four kids, one of whom has boomeranged back home, have a husband, and a dog, and work from home, as well as watch my grandkids two full days a week, and yet I feel so lonely. My husband is still working too and is gone 12 hours a day. My son's emotional health is somewhat fragile, and I have to be sure he is doing OK. I don't see friends. No one calls. They rarely text. I'm lucky if I'm out of the house for four hours a week (church, grocery shopping, and to the library, mainly). I used to have a dozen very close friends I'd see regularly and could confide in. Now, many of my friends have moved on and either also work or are retired and have lots of free time while I do not. I feel like, other than those people who see me every day because they have to, I could drop out of sight and no one would even know it. I've turned to books and read whenever I can. Books are great, but I'm really missing close friendships. I'm hoping life will change. I have a chronic illness, too, and depression goes along with it, and I'm wondering if this is how I'll feel till the end. Thanks for listening.
Dearest Susan, for sure I shouldn't be surprised at those very sad people calling you disgusting names and saying just awful things to you. However, the majority of us consider you and Desi an extended family that we just like and love. When I goof up and watch too much negative You Tube and get jumpy and scared ( I live alone and am 77 years old) I listen to you and laugh at some of Desi's antics and relax and sleep well. I LOVE Desi's singing! I to have a little abused rescue, Marvin, and he is just a wonderful little guy. Oh, your humor and the things you say to Hal have me laughing again the next day. So, keep smiling, letting us be a part of your life and know how much you have helped us. Love and peace to you and Desi, Carol Gabriel
@@user-of8dm3yk1q Susan, thank you so much for your reply. I am feeling better and realized I do have to go on and make the best of my life. Nobody can do it for me. We just have to get up every day and do it. I always enjoy your videos love from South Dakota.
😊❤ what a great video Susan ! That was so real for me I ve been on disability for 15 years! lost a few good friends and i agree that getting out is so good for us i've made such great people! We go for coffee and we go thrifting as well! Not being able to go back to work was hard to accept ! But i love my life as a new 60 year old !
So many of us are isolating. I call it self imprisonment. I don't really understand why I do it. I'm 73, intelligent, witty, engaging. People still consider me to be pretty. I put makeup on every day, put my outfit (usually a fitted tank & linen pants) together thoughtfully...including earrings! Some days, that's all I do. I look out of my window at the trees and blue sky, and wonder why I don't have access to them. I do, of course. But I rarely leave my apartment. Then I lament the "loss" of so many years. You have truly encouraged me today Susan. It's not too late to live my life. You are a beautiful woman with curves. Don't lose another pound!
In a matter of 3 months I lost both my dogs. One minute I have these 2 beautiful dogs sleeping with me, following me around the house, even into the bathroom..lol and now nothing. I am an active person involved in women groups so I'm out of the house a few days a week, but when I leave I think, make sure you shut the doggy door. I look over there and of course its already closed and has not been opened. I would come home to two excited dogs seeing me and now no one. I still cry over both of them, some may think that's dumb, but only a true dog lover know's the pain. I know I will get another dog but giving it a little time before I start that beautiful journey again.
I know that pain. We've always had dogs & cats and I have loved them all more than most people! Go rescue a dog from the pound. Ours are free!it We gave them a donation. Came with spay, all vaccinations & ear chips. The joy is back!
The loss of a pet is gut wrenching. I have lost quite a few myself and it takes me such a long time to “get over it”. So sorry you are going through this.
My son died 16 years ago, at the age of 33, and left 4 children, he was not married at the time, and left his children their fathers inherent, since 2008, when the children were little, they would see me for a little while, but now they are grown adults, and have a family, and they have forgotten me, or know who I am, I have become numb because I never grieved my son completely and he was my first born. Even my younger son, and his family doesn't see me only if I am lucky once a year - Christmas time. Just making an appointment to see them, they back out at the last moment after I get excited to see my grandsons, I get disappointed so often that I am just what you said, NUMB. I have felt numb for over 16 years now, I just can't seem to feel happy or excited to see or feel anything because if I do, I just get disappointed again and again. It' wasn't worth it. Then there is dealing with a husband that doesn't know how to be happy, he loves to be negative all the time. For me that is sad, I do my best to stay happy but every time I do, I am hit again with disappointment. So again, it's just not worth being happy until I can live by myself in a new environment and have a scenery change. I turned 71 today, the 4th of August, and I really know the one thing that does make me happy is my two paw babies, they love me unconditionally and protect me, and stay close by and we talk, and sing, and they respond just as if they were human. They have never failed me once. I can depend on them, as I love them so much that it does concern me how will I be without them. I love seeing you every week and listen to how your life is so put together, and one day I will have that chance to do the same, and then I maybe will be able to have peace, joy and health they way God wants me to be. Sorry, this is long, but I know that life isn't what it all seems to be.
I think some of what we feel, as we get older, is the loss of our youth. There is so much that is exciting about being young and meeting your first love or the man who will be your husband. Then you have your children and there is always something new happening as they grow. If we are alone, when we reach our senior years, it is a new passage of life that is so different than when we were young. I think some of the numbness is actually a defense mechanism that allows us to still move through life and feel at peace. If we are constantly looking for some kind of passion or a new dream it can lead to disappointment and we want to avoid that at all costs. What I am seeking is contentment. If I can learn to be content with my life, then I feel that I will have accomplished something pretty wonderful. Also, I feel that our later years are meant to be in search of spiritual growth. We can learn to think of others more than ourselves. That is something pretty special as well.
First of all, you look beautiful in your red summer outfit! You have known pain and understand it. But you have steered a course to acceptance. You open the door to new possibilities . And you are showing Chris as a role model how to survive older age with grace and joy. Those who insult you just want you to react because they feel nothing positive about themselves . You celebrate life, and you offer light to those of us who want to learn how to embrace what we have instead of mourning of what we have lost. Just thank you for being here.
Thank you for being a beautiful, intelligent and empathic person. Your beautiful, soft, kind and radiant face is so warm and expressive. This video summed up perfectly how I have felt since my husband died just over 2 years ago. Less than a year before that, I lost my mum. I also retired early in order to spend as much time as possible with my husband, but in the end, that turned out to be only 1 week. I have re-written my life, volunteering with many local charities, forcing myself out into the world around me, and have made lots of new friends. Despite all that, I have still felt emotionally numb on many occasions. Ironically, a situation at work recently where I was being bullied and gaslighted has finally brought my emotions back. I have found my self respect again, have removed myself from a toxic environment I refuse to be part of, have felt anger, have cried more than ever before, but I feel connected to my emotions again. I strongly feel that the next chapter of my life is going to be filled with lots of positive emotions.
Amen to that! What I have noticed is that there are quite a few women who are purposely so thin that the bones in their face have sharp edges. Some of them wear clothes that emphasize their extreme thinness and , to me, that is a positively scary look overall. I rather like the mature look of a woman who is , shall we say , filled out . I am a little too “ filled out” and need to be twenty pounds lighter but I have no desire to be a size zero.
Susan:). I honestly think you are at the perfect weight. Those who call you fat are jealous. Please be happy as you are:) It’s good you keep at it. When you get older it’s really hard to lose weight. I lost 20 due to ur encouragement and my doctor was pleased and now I only have to take one medication for my Thyroid. Which he said he may have to decrease in 3 months. Seeing you once a week keeps me motivated!🤗
Dear Susan, you are the best, don’t listen to the people who want to take your mood down. We love you just the way you are and not only for your looks ( gorgeous ), but for your inside too. You make my day here in the Netherlands every sunday morning and I love it when you are passing by in my life. You really are a poet because you always seem to use the right words to come in to my ❤ Have a lovely week 🥰
Hi Susan, you look lovely! A guy friend said to me recently, I don't care what someone looks like, I care about if they have passion or not... As I'm aging, I noticed that I was becoming hypercritical, so I decided to change that. I still have no family and often feel very alone, but I started painting again and I try to maintain a positive attitude. For myself, first and foremost And, I'm trying to get out and meet people 🙏🌺 🇨🇷 🌺
I was going to pass on watching you tonight, and I'm so glad I didn't. You nailed my life. Only. I called it "the magic" is gone. I am finally at the age I can retire but was staying on . I've hated this job for 20 years and finally I decided on Friday that I'm done. I am going to retire at the end of the year. I will find another job to supplement my income, but it will be a happy job. I am going to go to counseling and work at getting the magic back. I want ME back. Loved tonight's message.
My son passed away in 2009. He was 23. I was 54. For years after his death I kept busy working, but was never happy, so when the pandemic hit in 2019, I was so grateful that I could quit pretending I was ok out in public and just stay home…and I’ve been home now for 4 years and I’m feeling exactly as you’re describing it. Numb. Last Oct. my daughter had my first grandchild. A darling little boy, Noah. You’d think it would be a joyous time for me, but I’m just not feeling it and I think it’s because I have a wall up protecting myself from loving him (or anyone else for that matter) because maybe I haven’t dealt with Alex dying yet? I’ll be 70 in April, and I feel like my house (and gardening and thrifting) is all I’ll be doing until the day I die and I feel like that may be a lot of long numb years unless I can figure out how to push through it, get past it and get back to loving life and the people in it.
Something comes into my mind and I don’t know if it would be helpful or not. But it almost sounds like you are trapped in a grief cycle. One thing that has helped me is something called tapping (or EFT). There are all kinds of videos about it online and while it seems simple or silly, it is anything but that. It is free and it is something we can do for ourselves.
I’ve noticed that as I age, I don’t ever feel excited anymore. I’m fine, I’m okay . . . I enjoy things . . .but I never rub my hands together and say, “oh boy oh boy”. I chalk that up to age. Maybe something will come along that puts a spring in my step. Maybe not. But there is a steadiness to where I am now and I’m thankful for that.
Yes I felt numb and empty and so alone when my husband died. I had never been completely alone before then all of a sudden I had no one, no one to talk to, no one to help in time of need, no one to hold me and just let cry. I was devastated and I cried everyday, I prayed for strength everyday. God never let me down,it's been almost four year now and I'm doing fine. I give the glory to God. He was and still is my rock and my strength. My husband died during the pandemic.
PRECIOUS Susan, You are beautiful inside & out !!! As a 69 year old woman I have been struggling with loosing my youthful . looks. I need to remind myself often that my real worth lies in my heart and the way I show love to others. As we all age, the most important trait that anyone can have is a BEAUTIFUL HEART !!! God Bless you & your sweet little Desi .
Just to add to all supporters We all feel lonely... all deal differently ... if I didn't have the Lord I would be done... You are a poet and tender soul I have found that serving others is a great remedy... I drive those who can't to their appointments... ie I am a UBBER for the Lord✝️🥰😆
I would like to feel numb. I live with my daughter and am in the basement alone. I feel so alone. She has no time for me. I get out as much as I can. The aloneness still stands. You are beautiful inside and out! I’m sorry you get hit with negativity, you definitely don’t deserve it. Thank you for sharing your life.
Your videos are so inspirational, especially this one really touched me. I can numb myself when I need to but then I will find many things to feel gratitude for....a sunset, watching the birds eat the seed I put out for them, feeding the stray cats and possums, going thrifting for cool junk for my art, or just reading a good book, hanging out with my dog, even doing dishes and letting my mind wander as I do them. Read physical pain can be a real thing with me and my old knees but the glory I feel when that pain stops and I feel good again is so sweet. I still allow myself to empathize others' pain and can cry for them as I want everyone to feel good but there's a lot of sorrow everywhere. I will look for the good and the sublime though to keep me going otherwise I'd be numb always too. Thank you for your wonderful wisdom. You are a beautiful soul inside and out.
I lost my dog on February 10th and our home has not been the same without her. We had her for 10 years and she was my first dog since childhood and it is like a pain of no other so far. She was my constant companion, my loyal baby girl, my protector, and my best friend. We will rescue another but our hearts still hurt. Hold Desi, take lots of videos, take lots of selfies with him, for you’ll be glad you did. Time is helping some but there is a constant reminder that doesn’t seem to go away. We are slowly getting better but we have to put it out of our minds and move forward and she would want that. It just doesn’t help to get swallowed up in it for too long. Oh no we will never forget her or even try to replace her, but we will just try and find joy again and move forward. I loved this video and can so relate to it. We do leave the house and try not to let the pain envelop us from living our lives. ❤ Lov to you and Desi. Thank you for all you do for us. 🙏🏼💞
So sad for your loss but please know, from my experience, that when we open our hearts to a new pet that may really need to be rescued from a shelter or bad home somewhere, that they really need people like us to give them a loving home so I hope you do so soon and you will also find that new pets love for you will help you heal and move forward. Take care
I can relate to this grief so much. Seriously think of adopting a dog/cat from a shelter. You may worry that you are too old to have another dog but there are so many older dogs that even a couple of years of love would be wonderful for them. Yes I know that’s opening up yourself to more hurt but think of the love you can given to another dog that may have not experienced any. Take care. ❤
I'm so sorry about your dog, I had to put my dog to sleep with cancer over a year ago and I still miss him so much. I have his ashes in a pillow next to me in bed😢💔
I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious fur baby. I know your pain. My little white fluff ball Lula died on June 6. She brought so much joy to me and to my husband with Alzheimer's who passed just a month later on July 6, four weeks ago today. Such a huge void in my life without them. I can only hope they are somehow together... Maybe watching over me now 💔💔 I'm so sorry you lost your puppy love. Our sweet pups bring us such comfort and joy.
I'm 64 and stay isolated. People exhaust me because I have had a lifetime of escaping toxic people. My family, friends, husbands, church members, bosses, co-workers and more. Most of those people wouldn't let go of me easily and it was traumatizing escaping stalkers. One of them was my own mother. I am spent emotionally and mentally. My husband and I are retired and we both just stay home. I'm grateful for him. I'm afraid of making friends because I'm afraid they will turn out being toxic also. I feel safe in my cute home that I decorated to make me happy. I enjoy engaging with people at the store or rare random social encounters. But I'm afraid to make long term friendships. It is hard to trust. I have PTSD and get triggered by a lot of people so I have chosen that I'm safe isolated. Thanks for listening. I love your channel. You are a sweetheart. 💗
Boy you just described me!! I'm 64 also, no husband but just moved in with my 88 year old father who has Type 1 diabetes. I so get what you say about toxic people, I am alone because I don't have the energy for the problems. The benefits of having friends at this stage of life does not outweigh the negative. Good luck to you.
@@truthmatters17 Thanks for your reply. I love how you said the benefits don't outweigh the negative. I find I don't have the energy for people's drama. I find a lot of people are addicted to drama and chaos and don't want peace. They can't be helped. I've paid my dues. I just want peace and joy.
I truly understand about being numb. I feel it everyday. Everyday, I look a man I fell in love with nearly 35 years ago and married him 32 years ago. He stopped loving me about 10 years ago. I look for a reason to hold on. Try to find a little light inside. I hold back my emotions. I want to kiss him and hold him and feel like I did; perhaps, still do. Where there is nothing where does one stand? He would rather have his ear buds in his ears or turn up the volume what he is watching rather than just to have a conversation with me. I think it's time to move on. Scary, yes, because I'll be 68 years old next month. And starting over is scary!
Susan my husband passed away recently and I couldnt quite understand why I have been feeling numb. Now I understand. I don't allow myself to feel anymore. I gave up crying also for fear I wouldn't be able to stop. I have stopped socializing also. Hopefully, after listening to you this evening I will have a breakthrough. Thank you for this very important message this evening. God Bless.
Hello Susan and Desi, I think losing my mom was the hardest for me. I took care of her towards the end of her life. She was very intuitive, and knew when her time was coming. The last 3 months were difficult. When she passed, it was on my birthday. After some soul searching, writing a journal, reading certain books, I got a job that I really enjoyed. I’m retired now, but I have God watching over me. Mom sends me butterflies now and then as a sign. See you and Desi next week Susan.🦋🦋🦋
I lost my mom on Christmas. The year before we couldn't get a turkey bc we assumed my husband would get one from work. That year he did not and l could no longer get one. My mom said she didn't want to come home then. The next year l told her we have a turkey and she seemed excited about coming home. The nursing home sent her to hospital a week before Christmas. They put her in a coma and stopped feeding her or giving her water. I got the flu and for three days l called and begged them to give her water. On Christmas l went there and she looked terrible. I tried to feed her water but it didn't help. She died that night. For years when l heard the song, "l'll Be Home For Christmas," l would cry.
@@heidibee501 That is so sad to hear what you went through. I bet you have held onto a lot of guilt over not being able to get there sooner. It probably would not have helped though. They did similar to my husband, as they realized the end was near and just let him go, as it was kinder that way and not let them suffer. Think of it that way, as it will help you when you think back. I am sure your mum is home with you, in spirit, each Christmas. Sending you love and hugs.
@@heidibee501 I’m so sorry you lost your mom at Christmas! I always felt the need to take care of my mom,but I could never make her happy again. But, I did find my biological father recently and we’re getting acquainted. My mom will always be close to my heart. Heidi, your mom is free now in Heaven and will always love you. Be good to yourself. Take care.
My ex-husband died in February. My heart is so heavy, my 4 grown children have lost their father, they are so sad,as am I. 10 grandchildren are with out the fun grandpa...life is sad... joy is a gift from God. I am still grieving.
My ex died 5 years ago, and my emotions are so confusing. Our grown children and my granddaughter are still hurting. And so am I. He was my first love.
And you will grieve for years. We had 1 child 3 grands they were the love of his life. We had 20 years and divorced. He died in 1997 at 54. I still dream about him . We were close and I was with him when he died. Even now I grieve hard.
I can relate to numb and depression... I'm in my 70's also but I guess I've been living in a different dimension... I didn't know there were that many cruel, hurtful people.. Calling others fat or degrade others is disgusting... I was raised to treat others - as you would want to be treated... Everyone has flaws but others shouldn't draw attention to them... You my dear have a beautiful soul and you make my day - to hear all your love pour out... You and Desi are soooo enlightening ~ Love your garden and adventures ~ you looked so gorgeous in each outfit and can't wait to see the final dress next week...
You are a treasure. No one shares like this. So helpful. Yes, when I keep out pain, I can't feel anything, so I have to allow some time in my deep hurts to be able to open to some joy. It helps to say to myself that I did the best I knew how at the time, and so did the others, then release us all. And BTW that dress looks fab on you, what lovely shoulders.
Ur Beautiful in every way, Susan💕 I can’t believe you brought up this subject as I was just thinking about it today and actually for years now that you mentioned it! I felt very young until my early 60’s. Now you put ur finger on it-I’m numb…Just no excitement, no physical friends. I look forward to seeing you once a week and I have one other “close” video friend. She has a huge family and they are all so close. But she does not have a girlfriend her age but is close with her sisters, children, grandchildren and great grandchildren! I don’t have that. I’m almost 73 and see my son once a week. Rest of the time I’m home-alone. So unlike the very popular girl and woman I used to be. If you have seen the weather reports you know FL has a tropical storm-soon to be -praying not-a hurricane. I’ve been a stick in the mud since hurricane Ian flooded me. You can’t escape these types of storms-moving west to east and south to north. So I pray. 🙏 It’s hard to be happy and bubbly with this lurking about. I’m just at an awkward age. If I were looking like you I would maybe, very possibly be looking for romance but I have no desire now. Ur deep thoughts and smile and ur fashion and makeup make me smile. I think I’m comfortably numb. ( Pink Floyd) Even my passion for music is not all consuming as it was. I did push myself to get a haircut and it really looks nice:). Everything going on in the world we have to stay on top of it but I do believe our faith is so important as we age. Anyway I feel better already and tomorrow I will prepare the best I can for the last minute preparations. Maybe we all have unresolved heartbreak that keeps us in that state you mentioned. I’ll just keep going:) Love to you and Desi. I do understand how much you miss Bill. It’s a void no one can fill 🤗🩷🙏
Good morning, I just watched your video on the TV. You mentioned that a watcher had the nerve to tell you that you are fat and that you should go on a diet! MY GOSH! Really !!! Someone would watch a show and then take the time to write out nasty words on a screen to someone who is out there trying to help people. You just have to wonder what causes that type of hate. I needed to boot up the computer and type to you... I AM SO SORRY YOU HAD TO READ THOSE words from someone in a painful life. Some positive words for you to read: THANK YOU...THANK YOU...for taking the time to do your show and for wanting to help others. You make a positive difference in people's lives. THANK YOU for being there for people.
Hi Susan, I'm Wendy, I live north of you (about 4 hrs across the border on Lake Huron, Ontario.Ca.) I just love your channel, found it 6 months ago.We have so much in common.I had a band in the 80's & 90's. I turned 70 on Apr 28th this yr. We're like sisters from another mother ( who I lost last Sept in her 98th yr.) You have a gift for calming me down and making me feel there is a chance that I just may get some of my "Wonder Woman" back.I had to say goodbye to my 21 yr old cat that set me back so badly but you are getting me out there again,slowly but surely. I could write you a book ! Don't worry,I won't, I have a bad habit of making it all about ME! You are helping me break that habit. You are so welcoming and sincere I can't thank you enough, Susan. Love from a distant friend.❤ I know your son's wedding will the best it can be, enjoy every minute ,you deserve it! LOVE, LOVE ,LOVE your gown! Till next time, keep smiling. 👋🥳
What a treasure you are to reach out and touch so many women who are trapped in hopeless situations from their trappings that life has given them. God has used you as a blessing to them. Letting them know that all is not hopeless. It is a place we have to get to , to realize that life is not hopeless. God doesn't want us to be unhappy, grieving, and resigned to give up on life. He gives us courage to face each new tomorrow if we will turn it all over to him. God Bless you, for what you do, and all those who feel lost.
I have days of feeling “flat” too. I retired 8 years ago - and over time family and friends have either passed away or moved away. What I really have missed was buying new clothes and shoes to wear to work and other social events. Especially shoes ( shoe people will understand.) A few weeks ago I saw some really cute shoes I would have loved to wear to work ….and then I thought why not? So I bought them, and have hopes I’ll be wearing them soon. Nice to have anticipation again. Even at 73 I’m still a shoe lover. Love to you and Desi❤
Thank you so much for this 💜 You articulated about the numbness so well, it was super helpful. I’ve never heard it described that way before. I’m so sorry that you sometimes get mean comments, you’re the last person to deserve that. Big hugs to Desy 💕💕
There are so many ugly people that say ugly things. Don’t listen to them. You are such a beautiful person inside and out. Keep doing what you’ve been doing, you’re fabulous! Sending hugs! 💜💜💜
You are a very beautiful woman inside and out! I have felt numb since my husband passed away suddenly in 2019. Nothing is the same. Thank you for your words and kindness…
I know, it's so hard when we lose our other half. They become pretty much our reason for most things, then when they are gone, we no longer have a reason. It's so hard. God bless.
Hello Susan. You said it perfectly. I pray every girl who has had pain, by abuse, emotional neglect, being cut down, tossed to the wind, used for money or benefits, mistreated by pure disrespect, and no love or leadership will be blessed today to overcome what the enemy has decided to do to her. He comes to steal, kill, and destroy, BUT GOD! God is our wonderful Rock and He is our first Love and no man on earth can love us like he can. He can give us our hearts desire when we seek the man like him! The man that has a heart craving to please the Lord! He will know then the way to treat that treasured woman. You look beautiful! You are a true inspiration.
I love the Queen Anne's lace at this time of year. Thank you for filming the field. This video went by so quickly, I was so absorbed and I think you offered some great advice with your own testament of what you went through. It is very very helpful. I encouraged someone else in the subscriber group, who has a very difficult life, discussed in the comments, to reach in and find a way to connect with others and even her own self to affirm herself for all the good she has done. It's surprises me how cruel some people are, or, least, how they are unable to empathize with another person's lot. This video is a warning flag for me just to be aware of my own motivations and feelings about myself and how I look and such. I've been very busy and don't go out when I'm going through busy times. But I do look forward to a time when I can travel and be out there again. I am still working and as I said before my mom just passed away so I'm settling up there. But I do enjoy the comments of the group and every video. That is a weekend friendship community connection!
Thank you Susan for your insightful, thoughtful impute. Your opinion is so appreciated for myself and so many others. You are a beautiful lady in all ways.
When my husband died l felt wounded and broken. But l had so much to do. When l lost him l lost my tenant, and my job too. My daughter lost the nanny for her kids. I spent five days a week at my daughter's place with the kids. On weekends l was at home with my cats and one grandkid. I had lots of admin work to do and a house to ready for sale. My whole life had to be reworked. I just moved forward, one step at a time. Years later l am busy but happy.
Anhedonia is a severe condition that describes a near-complete absence of enjoyment, motivation, and interest. A core feature of depression, clinical manifestations of anhedonia can include deficits in experiencing pleasure, approach-related motivated behavior, and learning how to match expectations to the environment. ❤ Thank you for introducing this. I'll ask my doctor about it. I can relate because of 3 very close deaths in only a couple years including my darling little dog. Whoever puts you down, just remember it's them who have the problem! You're glowing and look so young!❤ xo to you and Dezi
I am learning all of this...I was shocked there was a name for what I felt...what I deal with at times...that dull ache that I am behind a curtain to protect myself...like burnout and a but of self-care...but not positive. It keeps me from the world! Much love to you!!! Susan
@LittlePoet I have this and didn't realize it until you spoke about it. I'm going to mention it to my Dr. She said she can't find any good men here. I can't either. We're lonely and I feel it's dangerous for myself. I was Extremely social. Around the best men. Had many friends. Now nothing but me. I'm going into a depression I've never experienced
I have been suffering for years. Never knew about Anhedonia. I intend to ask my psychiatrist about it next appointment. Total lack of motivation. Some days I don't want to shower!! .This is something different. I could see where you could think this is just depression! I don't even want to shower some days! T. Some days I donhank you for giving it a name.
I so enjoy your beautiful videos; these are a pleasure to watch while listening the wisdom you share with us. I’m 68 and have been a widow for 10 years. I haven’t felt particularly numb, but I am aware that a large part of my life seems muted. I can feel frustration, disappointment and discontent stronger than I like but enjoyment is often dulled. Still, I have moments when I am enthusiastic and it’s when I am volunteering with my little dog, Eloise, as a Therapy Dog team visiting schools and the nursing home. Volunteering has been so healing but I still have work to do on myself when I’m alone.
Hello dear Susan!! Thank you for sharing your feelings of numbness with us!! Over the last few years I’ve alternated between feeling numbness and complete panic as I had to deal with a job loss and struggling with health issues and the anxiety of the pandemic. I often find myself feeling overwhelmed by my circumstances and numb to the beauty and blessings of my life. I know that I can’t continue this way. I’m learning to get out of my own head and realize how far I’ve come and how valuable I am as a woman. That’s why I love tuning in to your channel every week!! You help me to keep going and not give up on myself!! For that, I’m eternally grateful!! Take care of yourself, dear, beautiful Susan!! I’m looking forward to hearing about your son’s wedding and your joy!! Sending you, precious Desi and your family lots of love and prayers!!😍😍😍🙏🙏🙏
Oh wow!!! Susan, I didn't realize that I have been living numb!! Crap on rye, this sux😳!!! What the heck am I doing to myself??!!! I work hybrid, 3 days home, 2 in the office. I've stopped going for walks, going to the beach, going to my favorite book store, strolling through a mall, more importantly I've stopped going to church!! I've been doing church online...remote...like my job!!! I have become invisible by my own doing! I have become too comfortable with this blank existence 😔!!! Numb!!! I have become fricken NUMB!!! Susan, I am grateful to you for this vlog. It was a slap in my heart!! I've only myself to blame. By the Grace of Almighty God I have to wage war within my mind and spirit to free myself from numb! I'm 68 years old and I've lost me!!! Crap on numb!!! Good Lord, what am I doing to myself!!! If I have become this numb now, what's going to happen when I retire! Oh heck NO!!! ❤ Love you Susan. Sending you hugs from NJ ❤
You look radiant today, just beautiful. I'll never understand what people get out of being so hateful. I work with the public and they can be brutal and feel entitled to be that way. Some days after work I just need to be alone and decompress from the day. Yes, many times I feel numb, bad divorce, death of parents, having to start over in my 60s ... life isn't always easy. The one thing I know God has given me favor and opportunities most people my age wouldn't have gotten. I may not have everything but I get by. Like scripture says I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I've had to remind myself of this often, it does help.
Wow! This describes me to a "T"!!! I lost my husband 8 yrs ago from brain cancer, but still miss him alot! Ever since he has passed, I feel empty, numb, joyless, etc. Especially this past year it really feels different! I have 3 kids but they seem to be too busy to care and I don't want to burden them so I keep alot of feelings inside of me. I would love to go see a counselor, but my oh my, they cost and I am also struggling financially. Some days I wonder what is my purpose anymore. Thanks for explaining the name for this feeling.
I don't pretend to know how you feel but I wonder if it would help to go out with a friend or two in a similar situation. Just to dinner or a hike or something. There has to be thousands of women who feel the same way. I wonder if they wish someone would ask them to go do something.
Yes, after my husband of 51 years passed away I felt numb for quite awhile. It has been almost 8 years, and I no longer feel numb, because 14 months ago I met this wonderful man. We were planning on traveling this summer together and then his work contract was extended 3 extra months, and I found out that I have a meningioma which is wrapped around my optic nerve of my left eye. So the traveling together this summer went right out the window. But....even with all this negative stuff going on, I do not feel numb. I am still optimistic about the future, because I have a good man to love, and love me. That makes all the difference in the world for me. Those who would say they'd rather be alone in their later years have no idea what someone special can do for your outlook on life, even when you are going through tough times. Thank you Susan, you bring joy and warmth into our lives each week. ❤
I feel very invisible. I'm single...almost 56..I don't talk with my kids(I have 5) very often..maybe twice a year. I don't feel joy anymore...I go through the motions daily and I wish i could get that purpose back...that joy. Thanks for doing this episode...It has given me some solace that I'm not the only one. ❤
As a life long Buddhist I try to focus on the moment I am in right now. I’ve had a difficult life and have become wiser as time passed. I look for beauty and peace in each moment. I’m not perfect but I try…and that is enough. Love to you and Desi.❤
Exactly! I lost my parents and then my husband. Grief. I’m numb now because I don’t want to feel like that again! I see beauty around me; I function in my world but it’s not the same as when you have your whole life ahead of you. I know I’m on the downslope. My body is changing and not for the better. My mind is different, too. Everything is getting harder. There is a whole cadre of women who just want to be alone. I’m in that camp. People annoy us! I try to go out but then everyone wants to drink and party; I don’t drink anymore. I don’t want that life anymore. There are great UA-cam videos about people younger than me that just want to be at home! In the garden! Playing music! Reading! Watching you on UA-cam!
Thanks Susan , I lost my husband of 43 years ..almost 5 years ago just as we were heading into retirement . During this time my mom was in care with dementia and I also became numb . Life was a struggle and I Couldn’t feel joy and knew it was missing . I struggled to let myself cry and didn’t know why . Grief manifests itself in different ways and I Thankyou for your insight and compassion in explaining this . I still struggle but have found ways to create and feel joy again thankfully . Those hard times have given me a much bigger heart and the realization that joy is all around us ….we just have to let it in and not to be afraid to feel ! I work at feeling gratitude and positivity every day . The best thing I did during this time was get myself a Dezi ….
I needed this today! I survived cancer 5 years ago. Everything in my life changed, even where I lived ! I even look totally different because I lost my breasts and had the treatment that can age us and throw us into premature menopause( I’m 52 now. I was in my forties when I got sick). It’s been so tough. Survival after illness can be very tough, even though I’m so grateful to be alive and healthy. Anyway, I’ve often felt nothing in the last couple years and wondered why. Your video is so beautiful and helped me a lot. Thanks❤
Dear Susan, my cousin who is 59 seems to be hoing through the same numb feelings. 🤔 She lost her husband last year, and her sin struggles with drug addiction and to top it off her daughter has a mental illness. She told me she cannot cry and feels numb and has no motivation. She is getting therapy now thank God. 😊 She has a beautiful soul and one of the most positive people I know. ❤️ Yes, being kind to ourselves and working through our pain and suffering instead of putting it in a box is so imprortant. There is no shame in crying and allowing us to grieve. However we need to be together and talk about what we are going through. Blessings to you Susan.
Thanks for sharing a new word with us-anhedonia. I know exactly how it feels and can relate. Thanks for all the time you spend taking beautiful pictures and sharing them with us. It is sad and lonely in the world and you bring a ray of hope.
I will be 70 this October and I am in my third marriage. My husband is 2 1/2 years younger than me. He had liver transplant September 2023 & it has changed him, FOR THE WORSE! He is chronically depressed and angry all the time now. Pre-liver transplant we had a really good marriage, which is NO longer the case. Now almost every morning when I awake, I grab my dog and we head outside and go for a walk in my beautiful neighborhood. I say hello to neighbors who are outside walking too, we smile, if only in passing sometimes we chat awhile. I talk to God, as I walk and remember to thank God for waking me up once again !! (A grateful heart is a happy heart). And as I write this I am asking myself, AM CURRENTLY NUM . . . alas, yes, I am. Susan, you posed a very thought provoking question.
Yes, I felt numb 20yrs ago when my dad passed, then 2yrs ago when I lost my mom, uncle, and my 69 yr. old brother within the same yr. The only thing that helps is my belief in God, and I know I will see them again. People that insult others are probably hurting inside themselves. You look amazing for any age!
I want to write you a letter!!!! It will be a happy, deep, acknowledgment of you and how you have touched me. I just turned 59 and last week someone who is the sweetest, gentlest, most passionate man just showed up when I went to watch live music at a restaurant with dancing. I cannot believe it. I wrote down what my wish list of "what I want in a man" and I am getting most of those things and more I never could have dreamed of. There really are nice men out there who are giving, generous and kind. Ask the universe for what you are desiring, then let it go, focus on you, hobbies, your pets, reading, singing, dancing, stay unattached to whether they show up or not, keep raising your own vibration and then they will show up. But, they will be more of what you need versus what you want because your higher self, God, your guides, they all know what you REALLY need.
Yes. That's my belief too. I don't always know what's best for me. But the universe sends things that are even better! Intent. Send it out & wait for it to come, doing everything in your power in the mean time! Thank you for sharing.
Today's offering left me in tears at the strong identification I feel of these ideas and feelings. I appreciate you and your channel for taking on the raw, real, less than perfect side of authentic living.
Little Poet, I am isolating. I suffer from chronic pain & severe GI issues. Some days I can't leave the house. And days where I don't want to. I look like I am 7 months pregnant, the bloating is so bad. Don't want people to see me! This is chronic. It's not going away! My quality of life is far from what it once was. I have beautiful clothes that I can't wear. I wish I was numb. Wouldn't feel the pain! But my joy & passions are affected. I say the serenity prayer. I'm finding it hard to accept! Medicine is great for acute issues, but awful for chronic ones! I try not to complain,yet here I am! Thank you for allowing me to say how I really feel. Much love to you & Desi & all the lovely women on your channel. 💜🌻🏡📸
Please research NoCarbLife. It is a channel that is about Carnivore diet helping so many sick people. I can say My spinal pain is gone. Our Medical system has failed so many.
OMG. Thank you Susan for talking about this today. Today I was talking to my friend about this issue. I bought a brand new car today every body was telling me congratulations and I felt numb to it! I even commented about my lack of emotion to my daughter because she was so excited about my new car. This video is the answer to a prayer I did today asking God to show me, what was wrong with me because I felt so emotionless. I labeled me a woman with a cold heart and questioned if that was normal. As a result of this group I would like to create a group where we can talk about this and heal, emotional healing. Anyone interested?
Hello there!! Thank you so much for being here! You really touched my heart! That numb feeling is hard to put into words...that " flat" feeling. We are not sad or depressed...we just are numb....for me, I do think it's from sweeping so many thing sunder the rug about losing so many friends...and not getting out enough and doing fun things just for me....I have never seen a group for anheronia before! There should be one!!! Loveot you always! Susan & Desi
I have lived with unresolved, complicated grief and trauma since losing my husband suddenly when I was just 47. It’s 11 years ago now but I’ve never moved on or accepted it. I had another relationship which was abusive. Since that ended two and a half years ago, I have suffered with crippling, life limiting anxiety and depression and have become totally numb, the only thing I can feel is pain and hopelessness. I’m now 58 and don’t see my life changing anytime soon. But I too am desperate to feel again, joy, pleasure, contentment and peace.
I have lived with depression & severe anxiety with panic attacks for many years. I see a psychiatrist & for me medication helps alot. It took awhile to find the right doctor & meds, but they definitely help. I had to change my thought process. I had to change many things about me. It was hard work but well worth it! Hang in there!
I mentioned this to someone else and I hope it is helpful: look at videos about EFT, or tapping. It is a way of breaking a cycle of thinking or despair. It has been helpful to me. It is free and it is something we can do for ourselves.
I'm finding that working 3 days a week with 4 young girls, teaching them life skills, laughing, and having that connection helps me since my husband died 4 years ago as of this August 1st, 2024.
Susan shame on the people who feel they can say the things they say to you. You bring so much to us each week and I enjoy looking forward to it. I lost my husband 21 years ago and feel numb in my retirement thinking this is when it would have been the greatest time to be together. Life is slower and some family member are gone and it would be nice to have him to enjoy the day with. Enjoy your son’s wedding festivities and I will be watching to hear all about it. Your Michigan friend.
Oh my gosh, you are so right! You made so much sense and are right on point. I am so very sorry for the negative comments of people who have no idea what true values are - so very sorry! Please accept my apologies for all those people. Thank you kindly for addressing this important topic. I don't know if you are aware of how many others you have helped to understand this, including me. I am sure that I speak for many, if not the great majority, when I say that you are a true blessing, an angel, and a gift from God. Honestly! I am so very glad I found your channel and subscribed. I just love your videos, every one of them that I've seen thus far and thank you from the bottom of my heart for being there. You'll always have my 'Like' 👍 ❤️
Yesterday i went to a funeral . The couple had been married for 39 years and he passed away one week short of his 67 th birthday . I have been single since 2010 . I cried a for about a month ate lots of haggen doz ice cream , drank lot of wine , i took a lot of baths , ate chocolate cake . Gained 10 pounds and said that is enough for me. I have never cried again not for us. Body shaming is NOT OKAY!!! Who ever body shames you hates themselves. You are gorgeous. STOP listening to vulgar people.
My BFF and I have talked about this subject - our stage of life (60’s) and not feeling true joy. We’re not unhappy, but we long for something to light us up! Don’t you think that a big part of it is we’ve already experienced all the “firsts” such as getting a drivers license, graduating high school/college, becoming an adult, marrying, having children, etc. At this stage now, we have to create our joy, but what is that? It seems elusive. I have reframed my thinking-I am blessed to have the freedom (post retirement) to choose anything that brings me pleasure, joy, happiness. Still it’s an ongoing search. It’s not that I’m unhappy, it just highlights this conversation-where is our joy at this stage? The great thing about us women is that we are strong and resilient and we will not stop searching. Power on, sisters! ❤
I 100% agree. At this stage of life we have accomplished many goals, we've experienced many joys and many sorrows but we're still here. It's up to us to find joy and a sense of purpose as we age. I would be lying if I said that I didn't get sad, depressed, and angry but I do my best to pull myself up and get going every day. I am grateful and thankful and I try to refrain from rehashing old hurts and issues. It's just not healthy. Cheers!
@@cwm5316 Yes, same! We can have depressive tendencies and still keep trying to find new joy and purpose at this stage. I’m pretty good at not looking back, and will continue to search for what lights me up now. Cheers to you too!
Susan, blessed to be married 52 years to my best friend. Long ago, during one of my many times of feeling too large, not as pretty…whatever, he said, Ya know, a woman can be a 10, open her mouth and drop to a 3….and a woman can be a 4, and her personality , intelligence and joy will make her a 12. Never forgot that and now at 72 years young, he still looks at me the same adoring way. As women, we are often so hard and unkind to ourselves in ways we would never visit on others. You are such a compassionate and lovely woman. We see it even if you don’t.❤😊
Ohhh I almost passed the video by thinking I wouldn’t relate to this but YES, yes i do. I “braced” myself just yesterday for an emotionally charged visit with my son and his family (long story), just to get through it! Thank you for helping me cry again 🥰
Susan: Jealousy is an ugly thing displayed by ugly people. Those criticizing you can only wish they were as beautiful as you. You have such an outer and inner glow. Keep doing what you're doing. It's certainly working for you.
Thanks again for sharing. I think we all have times of feeling numb but I always tell myself to be thankful for what I have . Loosing my husband after all theses years has really changed me and I will never be the same person I was. There are things I would have enjoyed doing at 76 if he was with me but now never want to do them. I have my very first great grandchild coming in September and yes I look back on all he has missed and feel sad he never saw our grandchildren and now our great granddaughter but if I look forward I can be happy and excited about them. I have to make the choice of how I am going to look at things. It’s not easy but I really am overjoyed about going to be a great grandmother . I don’t want to miss out on the very Special gifts God has graciously allowed me to have. This may not make any sense to others but this is my way at trying to be grateful for what I have today.
Wow, you look amazing in your red halter. Your skin is so young looking! I remember feeling numb when I found out my live in boyfriend was going to be a dad! I distinctly remember trying to numb my brain with straight vodka, it didn’t work (as I’m not a drinker 😂). This was in the 80s. And was a huge turning point in my life. It set me on an amazing path that led me to the US and my amazing husband. We will be celebrating our 21 year anniversary this Oct. I’m turning 63 this month and find joy in nature, travel, family, my cats. A beautiful sunrise, a full moon, so many things. It does make me sad too that people don’t feel joy.
I'm 76 and my ex husband just died a few months ago and my daughter rented a house to have a memorial for him. I was so afraid to go, have gained so much weight, let myself go, and was so afraid to see old relatives that I haven't seen in years. I prayed so hard and went and even though I felt like a wreak, everyone was so loving, giving me hugs right and left. I'm so thankful to God and was able to share some things about him that I loved and appreciated. It is sad though, like you, I've been wondering "if only", but I'm thankful not to have any bitter feelings towards him, try to remember the good times, thankful to have been married and experienced having children, even though it didn't work out. I appreciate your encouragement ❤
I love to cook... So I cook or I bake and I share a little with my neighbors sometimes....this beings me joy, it forces me to socialize a little, and it puts a smile on Everyones face !!! Let's face it as we get older we all have pain and grief and we all have lost someone we love.... You cannot dwell on it.... And the best way to put joy in your life is to do something for someone else!!!!
At this age we have all had pain sorrow and lost someone we love..... That's life, you can't dwell on it.... The best way to put Joy back into your life is do something for someone else!!!
Susan, I love your music. I want to buy an album of yours. People say the most terrible things to you. Some people are so small. You are a beautiful person. Thank you for being here. ❤
For the last, at least 8 yrs I've felt this way. I couldn't tell you the last time I felt excited or why. Its not even depression, it's just....nothing. Life is so hard.
I've been numb for sure. Just released from hospital and trying to get stronger. Seeing you and little Desi is always inspiring. Have a great week. Love you.
I was shocked when you said someone said … why don’t you lose weight? How rude and wrong! Last week when you were modeling your dresses … I thought you looked wonderful in them! You actually have a waist! I sure don’t! I am 76 soon 77 and was always tall and thin! Then middle age hit … I gained that dreaded additional weight around my middle and shrunk my height by 3.5”! As Dean Martin would say in one of his songs, Isn’t that a kick in the head? 😮 You certainly do not look 70! Okay …. I’m better … really upset me someone would write that!🥰 Wonderful Vlog … Desi is SO handsome! Till next week girlfriend …! 🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️❤️🇺🇸🇺🇸
I am considering going to grief support due to so many deaths of loved ones the past two years. I'm tired of feeling numb; that's the way I've felt before. If I start crying, I won't be able to stop. I'm going to seek out friendships because I do love being around people. I don't have much interaction with people. I'm pretty isolated and I m tired of it. I've made myself ill by doing this. I'm 73 and I'm starting over. I'm going out whether I want to, or not!❤❤❤❤love you Susan. I know you'll be so happy going to the wedding. Have fun!
Dear Susan, I began watching this afternoon after telling my boss (I work from home online) that I just could not do any more today. I am back in bed. A place I have been so much in the last few years. I look forward to all your videos and count on you to get me through, to give me reflection and perspective. I was able to be given a short ride through my small town just 2 evenings ago and did not feel this numbness. I felt bewilderment and shock. All the people and places are gone now that I grew up with and all the families that knew each other. It was surreal. And then I came home and numbed out again. But what you talked about, that deep lack of emotion is a place I crawl into to escape all my past and current pains. Over and over and over. It really is too much to go into here, because there is so much. But this feeling of no feeling is worse than all the strong currents of my younger years. Because I realize I've lost myself. I am not "me" anymore. I don't feel as if I am anybody. I don't feel real. I AM that 69-year-old you spoke of who says, "I just can't". And I don't. I am an introvert, but still I used to be social and outgoing and fun. I have tried antidepressants. I've tried cleaning and rearranging what I have. It's not enough. I wish I could get over this awful humiliation and embarrassment about how old I look now. But it goes deeper than that. I feel no worth. Your topic for this video is so very relevant and has deep roots in societal outlooks on an older woman's place in a society that glorifies youth. It has to do with a loss of those groups of women who got together. There is an epidemic of loneliness in women in this country/across all age groups. But it's our generation who remembers what women had at one time. Each other. Thank you for doing this video.
After reading these comments about not feeling the joy of life for so many people, I feel very sad. Wonderful people who have given so much of themselves to others but now feel forgotten or an afterthought. We were there when our parents, in laws and children needed someone. We drove sick family members to the doctor, brought over a hot meal to a niece or friend that just had a baby. We never forgot to send a birthday card. We did it out of love, it was our pleasure to help out. In some ways we were teaching the younger generations the importance of family. I think much of that connection is gone, family members scattered all over the country. I live alone after divorcing my abusive husband. My children live in three different states. My other family members live over an hour away. We all have cell phones and computers, it could be so easy to stay in touch. We get busy with work and day to day activities, we don’t take the time to communicate. Then that person has died. What a small thing to have called that person to say hello and what joy that person would have received from a simple phone call. It is no wonder so many of us have lost the joy of living.
I don't know when I felt true joy the last time. I go through the motions of living. I am the sole caretaker of my sister who is 56. Her children won't help her or me. I am just numb from all the exhausting work. There is no time for me. Your videos are a god send! I look forward to them every week. Hugs!!
My dear lady, I work for a woman who cares for her sister. And I want you to know that I hear you loud & so very clear. And I am praying for you. I hear & see so many of your longings. 🙏🏻 God bless you.
So sad that there are people who try to find “life” by making mean comments. What a sad existence. Feeling powerful by attempting to tear someone down. I love how you spoke about it. Not letting them win. Thank you. ❤ You are my Saturday evening anticipation.
Sometimes you just get sick of people & family constantly judging you, and negative conversations. I've started chanting positive chants, and it has been a blessing for me, surrounding myself with joy, music, and nature. Love yourself & accept the beauty in the moments. Thanks for sharing, so many lovely products, and the red polka dot dress looks extremely good on you. Desi adorable 🥰 Love y music 🎶
Hahaha I commented before the end of the show grinders papers and pipes!! 😂😂
That is a marijuana store!! 😂
Oh my! What is a grinder? I thought maybe it was a medical store....xxoo Big Hugs!!! Susan & Desi ( Gangsta)
In some states Grinders are big sandwiches.
I did too!
You are amazing, women are the worst at cutting each other down, destroying others, with hurt, words...
I love the old saying,”No matter how you feel: Get Up, Dress Up, Show Up, and Never Give Up! “😊
Wow! You just sum up my life in this video. I didn't know there was a name for feeling numb not to feel pain, grief, brokenness, lonely, and sometimes unloved. When I tried to explain to a few friends how I felt. They simply said I was too needy. So, I closed myself up physically and emotionally. I went through so much after my ex-husband left me for another woman. I raised my 4 children by myself. That was 26 years ago. I've been bullied at work, been through horrible sickness, and cancer. So after going through all of these horrible things and my few (3) friends telling me I was playing the victim or being needy, I just became numb. I lost 3 nephews under the age of 32 in the past 3 years. Losing my father, aunt, and dealing with so much grief, it pushed me a little closer into isolation. I exist. I don't live life. I feel like a robot going through the daily motions. I also take care of my 81 years old mom and my 54 years old brother with dementia. Sorry, it's such a long comment. I usually don't comment, but tonight, the video spoke about me. There are things I'm grateful for my 6 grandchildren and my adult children. And God, without Him, I probably wouldn't be here. Thank you for sharing. ❤
I think your friend are disgusting! Hope you ditch them and love yourself like the best friend you ever had. You have plenty of reason to feel what you have felt. What selfish ugly people they were to treat someone suffering and grieving so terrible. Wish I could give you a hug.❤
We matter to God, for sure, and we can carry Him along with us wherever we go! The Holy Spirit will be a friend truly closer than a brother. You are so very valuable to Him! I loved reading your comment-regardless of the length! ❤️ I agree with Aya! Ask God for new friends…He will do it! Wish I could hug you too!
I’m so happy you rely on our Heavenly Father for support, his words of wisdom and love are real and alive when we read the Bible plus it gives us hope for our future ❣️
@@delladearest2511 Amen!
You spoke right to my heart. I have felt numb, invisible, and lonely for the past few years. It’s good to know that I’m not alone. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
I'm from Ireland. I've lived alone for years. Watching your videos has inspired me. I got the courage to move house at 67,look after myself,start to wear make up again. I'm not invisible any more. Yes life isn't easy but I now have motivation. You are a beautiful woman. I'm so glad I found you. Thank you.
My mom was born in Ireland 🇮🇪 ❤
@ViYoung-os4kv I too am Irish born and bred but living in Vancouver. I applaud you, finding the courage to make change is never easy☘️😊
Unresolved grief is the silliest thing I have heard. Grief is the price we pay for loving someone. I wouldn’t change that for the world. My daughter would be 51 next month. She died when she was 7 from leukemia. My son was killed 11 years ago. The pain never goes away. I just have more time between the pain as I get busy with life, but it hurts just as much when ithe thoughts creep in. I have a saying on my wall “life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. Its about learning to dance in the rain.” Hope this helps someone.
I worked in the Medical Profession for 53 yrs and one of my nurses gave me a wonderful hand drawn picture with the following words.....If you are going to walk on thin ice ....you may as well Dance...there is a beautiful Ballerina drawn in this picture!! I just adore this saying!!!!!
Susan, you have a way making everything seem OK. I know I just went through the motions when my husband died. My daughter had gone to prison and six weeks later my husband died. I was still working at the time and raising my 15 year old grandson. I was 65 at the time. My daughter was in prison for 26 months and I continued working until I was 75. My grandson has been with me since he was born and I love him to pieces. At 75 I retired and just three months later the pandemic hit, so I was at home with my grandson for all of that time. Two years ago, my legs decided to not hold me up. I went to the hospital and was there for 5 weeks. I had back surgery while I was there. I've gotten to the point, I don't care what people think of me. I'm now 80 years old and I have really aged in the past two years, but it's OK. I'm doing the best that I can. I use a walker when I go out, but not when I'm in the house. I just feel happy to be alive. People have no right to be insulting to you. You are very beautiful and you will be a great asset to your son's festivities and his wedding. If I could walk better I would feel more confident. Thank you for the words of wisdom and encouragement that you give us every. And give that handsome Desi a pat on the head from me. Thank you. Sending Light and Love to you and all of your subscribers. ❤🙏❤
God bless you! You are a very brave and loving woman!💟
You are such an inspiration with what you have dealt with in your life. I send you so much love and hugs and well wishes.💖
Maureen, thank you for sharing your story with us. I have not had an easy life from the "git go" and for so long I felt like I was the only one not living the "Father Know Best" life. I was completely wrong. Stupidly, as I have worked and grown older, I thought I had gotten wiser. In someways, yes, in others NO. I am estranged from my only son, I have a husband with the beginning stages of Alzheimer's, and an autistic daughter who will never live by herself. I wonder why I have ever thought it would be easy? Anyhow, I do join you in your appreciation of Susan. I really do look forward for to seeing you and Desi every week. I love when you document you successes also! You give me realistic hope!
Wow Maureen, what a woman you are! Your family are so lucky to have you x
God bless you! You have been a huge blessing to your family. Now it’s time to focus on your health and happiness. Decide what brings you joy and dive in❤️
Susan you look at least twenty years younger. You love nature, decorating, music, dogs, and art. Those interests keep you young in spirit.
Noooooooooooooooooooo!!!!! Cheick is in the mail Linda!!!
I was just thinking the same thing watching her 🙌✨🌹
Yes, however this blossoming of creativity, stems from a spiritual root! ❤This is one of the very best videos that Susan has created for us! Deeper, higher, wider, is the eternal Love of our Fathet God!!
Susan, you are an inspiration!! Thank you so much, from a divorced woman who tried to avoid her feelings by numbing out with food and by putting on this thin mask of superficially!! We free ourselves beyond survival into thriving!! God bless you! ❤
Absolutely agree! Ms. Susan is Gorgeous and a Beautiful Soul😍☺😇
I have to say you sure look great😀. Have a great wedding week.
Feeling invisible, staying inside for days, feeling judged and misunderstood.....all of the above! Thank you for understanding.
You are not alone. ❤
Anna, I am so with you. If you can, go for a walk, talk to neighbors, meet someone for lunch or whatever. Do that a couple of times a week. Please stay connected. You are not alone in this, I assure you. Much love to you and blessings too.
@stellajohnson5301 thank you for replying! It's nice to know others are there and understand. I do engage with seniors around my area and the occasional neighbor, but I'm really missing the personal connections! Life takes us thru trials. I'm a believer and know I am never alone. But we all crave connection to humanity. God bless you and your journey 🙏
As the others have said, you are not alone! I'm feeling the same way. I need to take all the experience, strength & hope and apply it to myself. I know how hard that is. With love.
I'm so glad I watched this video today to learn that there are others out there like me. I am feeling that way now, too--numb. I had a couple hours to finally get out of the house today, but, lacking motivation, I couldn't decide where to go. I ended up not leaving the house after all. I'm in my early 60s, have four kids, one of whom has boomeranged back home, have a husband, and a dog, and work from home, as well as watch my grandkids two full days a week, and yet I feel so lonely. My husband is still working too and is gone 12 hours a day. My son's emotional health is somewhat fragile, and I have to be sure he is doing OK. I don't see friends. No one calls. They rarely text. I'm lucky if I'm out of the house for four hours a week (church, grocery shopping, and to the library, mainly). I used to have a dozen very close friends I'd see regularly and could confide in. Now, many of my friends have moved on and either also work or are retired and have lots of free time while I do not. I feel like, other than those people who see me every day because they have to, I could drop out of sight and no one would even know it. I've turned to books and read whenever I can. Books are great, but I'm really missing close friendships. I'm hoping life will change. I have a chronic illness, too, and depression goes along with it, and I'm wondering if this is how I'll feel till the end. Thanks for listening.
Dearest Susan, for sure I shouldn't be surprised at those very sad people calling you disgusting names and saying just awful things to you. However, the majority of us consider you and Desi an extended family that we just like and love. When I goof up and watch too much negative You Tube and get jumpy and scared ( I live alone and am 77 years old) I listen to you and laugh at some of Desi's antics and relax and sleep well. I LOVE Desi's singing! I to have a little abused rescue, Marvin, and he is just a wonderful little guy. Oh, your humor and the things you say to Hal have me laughing again the next day. So, keep smiling, letting us be a part of your life and know how much you have helped us. Love and peace to you and Desi, Carol Gabriel
@@user-of8dm3yk1q Susan, thank you so much for your reply. I am feeling better and realized I do have to go on and make the best of my life. Nobody can do it for me. We just have to get up every day and do it. I always enjoy your videos love from South Dakota.
Why do we become bitter about this season of life?
😊❤ what a great video Susan ! That was so real for me
I ve been on disability for 15 years! lost a few good friends and i agree that getting out is so good for us i've made such great people! We go for coffee and we go thrifting as well! Not being able to go back to work was hard to accept ! But i love my life as a new 60 year old !
So many of us are isolating. I call it self imprisonment. I don't really understand why I do it. I'm 73, intelligent, witty, engaging. People still consider me to be pretty. I put makeup on every day, put my outfit (usually a fitted tank & linen pants) together thoughtfully...including earrings! Some days, that's all I do. I look out of my window at the trees and blue sky, and wonder why I don't have access to them. I do, of course. But I rarely leave my apartment. Then I lament the "loss" of so many years. You have truly encouraged me today Susan. It's not too late to live my life. You are a beautiful woman with curves. Don't lose another pound!
A touching video. A great message. Older women don't need to hide and isolate themselves just because they have aged. It will happen to all of us.
In a matter of 3 months I lost both my dogs. One minute I have these 2 beautiful dogs sleeping with me, following me around the house, even into the bathroom..lol and now nothing. I am an active person involved in women groups so I'm out of the house a few days a week, but when I leave I think, make sure you shut the doggy door. I look over there and of course its already closed and has not been opened. I would come home to two excited dogs seeing me and now no one. I still cry over both of them, some may think that's dumb, but only a true dog lover know's the pain. I know I will get another dog but giving it a little time before I start that beautiful journey again.
I know that pain. We've always had dogs & cats and I have loved them all more than most people! Go rescue a dog from the pound. Ours are free!it We gave them a donation. Came with spay, all vaccinations & ear chips. The joy is back!
The loss of a pet is gut wrenching. I have lost quite a few myself and it takes me such a long time to “get over it”. So sorry you are going through this.
My son died 16 years ago, at the age of 33, and left 4 children, he was not married at the time, and left his children their fathers inherent, since 2008, when the children were little, they would see me for a little while, but now they are grown adults, and have a family, and they have forgotten me, or know who I am, I have become numb because I never grieved my son completely and he was my first born. Even my younger son, and his family doesn't see me only if I am lucky once a year - Christmas time. Just making an appointment to see them, they back out at the last moment after I get excited to see my grandsons, I get disappointed so often that I am just what you said, NUMB. I have felt numb for over 16 years now, I just can't seem to feel happy or excited to see or feel anything because if I do, I just get disappointed again and again. It' wasn't worth it. Then there is dealing with a husband that doesn't know how to be happy, he loves to be negative all the time. For me that is sad, I do my best to stay happy but every time I do, I am hit again with disappointment. So again, it's just not worth being happy until I can live by myself in a new environment and have a scenery change. I turned 71 today, the 4th of August, and I really know the one thing that does make me happy is my two paw babies, they love me unconditionally and protect me, and stay close by and we talk, and sing, and they respond just as if they were human. They have never failed me once. I can depend on them, as I love them so much that it does concern me how will I be without them. I love seeing you every week and listen to how your life is so put together, and one day I will have that chance to do the same, and then I maybe will be able to have peace, joy and health they way God wants me to be. Sorry, this is long, but I know that life isn't what it all seems to be.
I think some of what we feel, as we get older, is the loss of our youth. There is so much that is exciting about being young and meeting your first love or the man who will be your husband. Then you have your children and there is always something new happening as they grow. If we are alone, when we reach our senior years, it is a new passage of life that is so different than when we were young. I think some of the numbness is actually a defense mechanism that allows us to still move through life and feel at peace. If we are constantly looking for some kind of passion or a new dream it can lead to disappointment and we want to avoid that at all costs. What I am seeking is contentment. If I can learn to be content with my life, then I feel that I will have accomplished something pretty wonderful. Also, I feel that our later years are meant to be in search of spiritual growth. We can learn to think of others more than ourselves. That is something pretty special as well.
You said that so much better than I did. I 100% concur, thank you! 😃❤
First of all, you look beautiful in your red summer outfit!
You have known pain and understand it. But you have steered a course to acceptance. You open the door to new possibilities .
And you are showing Chris as a role model how to survive older age with grace and joy.
Those who insult you just want you to react because they feel nothing positive about themselves .
You celebrate life, and you offer light to those of us who want to learn how to embrace what we have instead of mourning of what we have lost.
Just thank you for being here.
Well said❤
❤❤❤
Better to have some weight on as you get older.❤
Thank you for being a beautiful, intelligent and empathic person. Your beautiful, soft, kind and radiant face is so warm and expressive. This video summed up perfectly how I have felt since my husband died just over 2 years ago. Less than a year before that, I lost my mum. I also retired early in order to spend as much time as possible with my husband, but in the end, that turned out to be only 1 week. I have re-written my life, volunteering with many local charities, forcing myself out into the world around me, and have made lots of new friends. Despite all that, I have still felt emotionally numb on many occasions. Ironically, a situation at work recently where I was being bullied and gaslighted has finally brought my emotions back. I have found my self respect again, have removed myself from a toxic environment I refuse to be part of, have felt anger, have cried more than ever before, but I feel connected to my emotions again. I strongly feel that the next chapter of my life is going to be filled with lots of positive emotions.
Good on you! You inspire me.
You’re NOT FAT! You are beautiful, you don’t need to be a broomstick to look pretty!
Amen to that! What I have noticed is that there are quite a few women who are purposely so thin that the bones in their face have sharp edges. Some of them wear clothes that emphasize their extreme thinness and , to me, that is a positively scary look overall. I rather like the mature look of a woman who is , shall we say , filled out . I am a little too “ filled out” and need to be twenty pounds lighter but I have no desire to be a size zero.
Susan:). I honestly think you are at the perfect weight. Those who call you fat are jealous. Please be happy as you are:) It’s good you keep at it. When you get older it’s really hard to lose weight. I lost 20 due to ur encouragement and my doctor was pleased and now I only have to take one medication for my Thyroid. Which he said he may have to decrease in 3 months. Seeing you once a week keeps me motivated!🤗
Disgusting what some ppl say to others they are insecure
Dear Susan, you are the best, don’t listen to the people who want to take your mood down. We love you just the way you are and not only for your looks ( gorgeous ), but for your inside too. You make my day here in the Netherlands every sunday morning and I love it when you are passing by in my life. You really are a poet because you always seem to use the right words to come in to my ❤ Have a lovely week 🥰
We're Not Fat We're Still Alive & Kicking
Hi Susan, you look lovely! A guy friend said to me recently, I don't care what someone looks like, I care about if they have passion or not...
As I'm aging, I noticed that I was becoming hypercritical, so I decided to change that. I still have no family and often feel very alone, but I started painting again and I try to maintain a positive attitude. For myself, first and foremost And, I'm trying to get out and meet people 🙏🌺 🇨🇷 🌺
Good for you for making changes!
Bravo🎉
Getting out is the best thing you can do. Painting is great too. I don't have that talent, but wish I did. Good for you.
I was going to pass on watching you tonight, and I'm so glad I didn't. You nailed my life. Only. I called it "the magic" is gone. I am finally at the age I can retire but was staying on . I've hated this job for 20 years and finally I decided on Friday that I'm done. I am going to retire at the end of the year. I will find another job to supplement my income, but it will be a happy job. I am going to go to counseling and work at getting the magic back. I want ME back. Loved tonight's message.
Oh you made me cry! You decided to let life in!!!! You are my hero Brenda!!!
My son passed away in 2009. He was 23.
I was 54.
For years after his death I kept busy working, but was never happy, so when the pandemic hit in 2019, I was so grateful that I could quit pretending I was ok out in public and just stay home…and I’ve been home now for 4 years and I’m feeling exactly as you’re describing it. Numb.
Last Oct. my daughter had my first grandchild. A darling little boy, Noah. You’d think it would be a joyous time for me, but I’m just not feeling it and I think it’s because I have a wall up protecting myself from loving him (or anyone else for that matter) because maybe I haven’t dealt with Alex dying yet?
I’ll be 70 in April, and I feel like my house (and gardening and thrifting) is all I’ll be doing until the day I die and I feel like that may be a lot of long numb years unless I can figure out how to push through it, get past it and get back to loving life and the people in it.
Something comes into my mind and I don’t know if it would be helpful or not. But it almost sounds like you are trapped in a grief cycle. One thing that has helped me is something called tapping (or EFT). There are all kinds of videos about it online and while it seems simple or silly, it is anything but that. It is free and it is something we can do for ourselves.
Don’t let Noah miss out on having a grandma.. ❤
You were spot on today 😊 Look forward to your weekly videos . Breath of fresh air on a Sunday morning 🌻
I’ve noticed that as I age, I don’t ever feel excited anymore. I’m fine, I’m okay . . . I enjoy things . . .but I never rub my hands together and say, “oh boy oh boy”. I chalk that up to age. Maybe something will come along that puts a spring in my step. Maybe not. But there is a steadiness to where I am now and I’m thankful for that.
Sounds like me,Im happy and settled just no excitement
Go out and find your excitement.
Maybe it’s time for a puppy. 😃
@@ahill4642 I just got one! I’ve had him almost 2 months. And what a dear he is!
Yes I felt numb and empty and so alone when my husband died. I had never been completely alone before then all of a sudden I had no one, no one to talk to, no one to help in time of need, no one to hold me and just let cry. I was devastated and I cried everyday, I prayed for strength everyday. God never let me down,it's been almost four year now and I'm doing fine. I give the glory to God. He was and still is my rock and my strength. My husband died during the pandemic.
The Lord will never let you down. Just turn to Him, and He will be there.
I'm so very sorry for your loss may God comfort you ❤
Desi is the sweetest thing! He loves his momma! ❤️
PRECIOUS Susan, You are beautiful inside & out !!! As a 69 year old woman I have been struggling with loosing my youthful . looks. I need to remind myself often that my real worth lies in my heart and the way I show love to others. As we all age, the most important trait that anyone can have is a BEAUTIFUL HEART !!! God Bless you & your sweet little Desi .
And youthful health
Susan, PLEASE block those negative people. You are real, and your joyful spirit irritates their miserable soul. Bless it and release it.
Just to add to all supporters
We all feel lonely... all deal differently ... if I didn't have the Lord I would be done...
You are a poet and tender soul
I have found that serving others is a great remedy... I drive those who can't to their appointments... ie I am a UBBER for the Lord✝️🥰😆
I would like to feel numb. I live with my daughter and am in the basement alone. I feel so alone. She has no time for me. I get out as much as I can. The aloneness still stands.
You are beautiful inside and out! I’m sorry you get hit with negativity, you definitely don’t deserve it. Thank you for sharing your life.
Your videos are so inspirational, especially this one really touched me. I can numb myself when I need to but then I will find many things to feel gratitude for....a sunset, watching the birds eat the seed I put out for them, feeding the stray cats and possums, going thrifting for cool junk for my art, or just reading a good book, hanging out with my dog, even doing dishes and letting my mind wander as I do them. Read physical pain can be a real thing with me and my old knees but the glory I feel when that pain stops and I feel good again is so sweet. I still allow myself to empathize others' pain and can cry for them as I want everyone to feel good but there's a lot of sorrow everywhere. I will look for the good and the sublime though to keep me going otherwise I'd be numb always too. Thank you for your wonderful wisdom. You are a beautiful soul inside and out.
I lost my dog on February 10th and our home has not been the same without her. We had her for 10 years and she was my first dog since childhood and it is like a pain of no other so far. She was my constant companion, my loyal baby girl, my protector, and my best friend. We will rescue another but our hearts still hurt. Hold Desi, take lots of videos, take lots of selfies with him, for you’ll be glad you did. Time is helping some but there is a constant reminder that doesn’t seem to go away. We are slowly getting better but we have to put it out of our minds and move forward and she would want that. It just doesn’t help to get swallowed up in it for too long. Oh no we will never forget her or even try to replace her, but we will just try and find joy again and move forward. I loved this video and can so relate to it. We do leave the house and try not to let the pain envelop us from living our lives. ❤ Lov to you and Desi. Thank you for all you do for us. 🙏🏼💞
So sad for your loss but please know, from my experience, that when we open our hearts to a new pet that may really need to be rescued from a shelter or bad home somewhere, that they really need people like us to give them a loving home so I hope you do so soon and you will also find that new pets love for you will help you heal and move forward. Take care
I can relate to this grief so much. Seriously think of adopting a dog/cat from a shelter. You may worry that you are too old to have another dog but there are so many older dogs that even a couple of years of love would be wonderful for them. Yes I know that’s opening up yourself to more hurt but think of the love you can given to another dog that may have not experienced any. Take care. ❤
Oh, your comment made me tear up for my beautiful beloved Bella. I share your pain from losing your special girl. Sending hugs. ❤
I'm so sorry about your dog, I had to put my dog to sleep with cancer over a year ago and I still miss him so much. I have his ashes in a pillow next to me in bed😢💔
I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious fur baby. I know your pain. My little white fluff ball Lula died on June 6. She brought so much joy to me and to my husband with Alzheimer's who passed just a month later on July 6, four weeks ago today. Such a huge void in my life without them. I can only hope they are somehow together... Maybe watching over me now 💔💔 I'm so sorry you lost your puppy love. Our sweet pups bring us such comfort and joy.
I'm 64 and stay isolated. People exhaust me because I have had a lifetime of escaping toxic people. My family, friends, husbands, church members, bosses, co-workers and more. Most of those people wouldn't let go of me easily and it was traumatizing escaping stalkers. One of them was my own mother. I am spent emotionally and mentally. My husband and I are retired and we both just stay home. I'm grateful for him. I'm afraid of making friends because I'm afraid they will turn out being toxic also. I feel safe in my cute home that I decorated to make me happy. I enjoy engaging with people at the store or rare random social encounters. But I'm afraid to make long term friendships. It is hard to trust. I have PTSD and get triggered by a lot of people so I have chosen that I'm safe isolated. Thanks for listening. I love your channel. You are a sweetheart. 💗
Boy you just described me!! I'm 64 also, no husband but just moved in with my 88 year old father who has Type 1 diabetes. I so get what you say about toxic people, I am alone because I don't have the energy for the problems. The benefits of having friends at this stage of life does not outweigh the negative. Good luck to you.
@@truthmatters17 Thanks for your reply. I love how you said the benefits don't outweigh the negative. I find I don't have the energy for people's drama. I find a lot of people are addicted to drama and chaos and don't want peace. They can't be helped. I've paid my dues. I just want peace and joy.
@@reneetones2077 yes indeed, they actually PREFER unhappiness!!!
I truly understand about being numb. I feel it everyday. Everyday, I look a man I fell in love with nearly 35 years ago and married him 32 years ago. He stopped loving me about 10 years ago. I look for a reason to hold on. Try to find a little light inside. I hold back my emotions. I want to kiss him and hold him and feel like I did; perhaps, still do. Where there is nothing where does one stand? He would rather have his ear buds in his ears or turn up the volume what he is watching rather than just to have a conversation with me. I think it's time to move on. Scary, yes, because I'll be 68 years old next month. And starting over is scary!
Susan my husband passed away recently and I couldnt quite understand why I have been feeling numb. Now I understand. I don't allow myself to feel anymore. I gave up crying also for fear I wouldn't be able to stop. I have stopped socializing also. Hopefully, after listening to you this evening I will have a breakthrough. Thank you for this very important message this evening. God Bless.
I feel that way too....I am so sorry for your loss...much love to you always, Susan
Blessings for you too ❤
@LittlePoet Thank you Susan. God Bless us all.
Hello Susan and Desi, I think losing my mom was the hardest for me. I took care of her towards the end of her life. She was very intuitive, and knew when her time was coming. The last 3 months were difficult. When she passed, it was on my birthday. After some soul searching, writing a journal, reading certain books, I got a job that I really enjoyed. I’m retired now, but I have God watching over me. Mom sends me butterflies now and then as a sign. See you and Desi next week Susan.🦋🦋🦋
I lost my mom on Christmas. The year before we couldn't get a turkey bc we assumed my husband would get one from work. That year he did not and l could no longer get one. My mom said she didn't want to come home then. The next year l told her we have a turkey and she seemed excited about coming home. The nursing home sent her to hospital a week before Christmas. They put her in a coma and stopped feeding her or giving her water. I got the flu and for three days l called and begged them to give her water. On Christmas l went there and she looked terrible. I tried to feed her water but it didn't help. She died that night. For years when l heard the song, "l'll Be Home For Christmas," l would cry.
@@heidibee501 That is so sad to hear what you went through. I bet you have held onto a lot of guilt over not being able to get there sooner. It probably would not have helped though. They did similar to my husband, as they realized the end was near and just let him go, as it was kinder that way and not let them suffer. Think of it that way, as it will help you when you think back. I am sure your mum is home with you, in spirit, each Christmas. Sending you love and hugs.
@@heidibee501 I’m so sorry you lost your mom at Christmas! I always felt the need to take care of my mom,but I could never make her happy again. But, I did find my biological father recently and we’re getting acquainted. My mom will always be close to my heart. Heidi, your mom is free now in Heaven and will always love you. Be good to yourself. Take care.
My ex-husband died in February. My heart is so heavy, my 4 grown children have lost their father, they are so sad,as am I. 10 grandchildren are with out the fun grandpa...life is sad... joy is a gift from God. I am still grieving.
My ex died 5 years ago, and my emotions are so confusing. Our grown children and my granddaughter are still hurting. And so am I. He was my first love.
And you will grieve for years. We had 1 child 3 grands they were the love of his life. We had 20 years and divorced. He died in 1997 at 54. I still dream about him . We were close and I was with him when he died. Even now I grieve hard.
My husband died in january. 47 years of marriage with three children and five grandchildren. We all miss him terribly😢
Oh dear, I am so sorry for your loss...are you ok?
Lean in to Him. He will bind up your wounds and give you His peace to carry on. Tell your grandchildren all about their wonderful Grandpa!!
I can relate to numb and depression... I'm in my 70's also but I guess I've been living in a different dimension... I didn't know there were that many cruel, hurtful people.. Calling others fat or degrade others is disgusting... I was raised to treat others - as you would want to be treated... Everyone has flaws but others shouldn't draw attention to them... You my dear have a beautiful soul and you make my day - to hear all your love pour out... You and Desi are soooo enlightening ~ Love your garden and adventures ~ you looked so gorgeous in each outfit and can't wait to see the final dress next week...
You are a treasure. No one shares like this. So helpful. Yes, when I keep out pain, I can't feel anything, so I have to allow some time in my deep hurts to be able to open to some joy. It helps to say to myself that I did the best I knew how at the time, and so did the others, then release us all. And BTW that dress looks fab on you, what lovely shoulders.
Ur Beautiful in every way, Susan💕 I can’t believe you brought up this subject as I was just thinking about it today and actually for years now that you mentioned it! I felt very young until my early 60’s. Now you put ur finger on it-I’m numb…Just no excitement, no physical friends. I look forward to seeing you once a week and I have one other “close” video friend. She has a huge family and they are all so close. But she does not have a girlfriend her age but is close with her sisters, children, grandchildren and great grandchildren! I don’t have that. I’m almost 73 and see my son once a week. Rest of the time I’m home-alone. So unlike the very popular girl and woman I used to be. If you have seen the weather reports you know FL has a tropical storm-soon to be -praying not-a hurricane. I’ve been a stick in the mud since hurricane Ian flooded me. You can’t escape these types of storms-moving west to east and south to north. So I pray. 🙏 It’s hard to be happy and bubbly with this lurking about. I’m just at an awkward age. If I were looking like you I would maybe, very possibly be looking for romance but I have no desire now. Ur deep thoughts and smile and ur fashion and makeup make me smile. I think I’m comfortably numb. ( Pink Floyd) Even my passion for music is not all consuming as it was. I did push myself to get a haircut and it really looks nice:). Everything going on in the world we have to stay on top of it but I do believe our faith is so important as we age. Anyway I feel better already and tomorrow I will prepare the best I can for the last minute preparations. Maybe we all have unresolved heartbreak that keeps us in that state you mentioned. I’ll just keep going:) Love to you and Desi. I do understand how much you miss Bill. It’s a void no one can fill 🤗🩷🙏
Good morning, I just watched your video on the TV. You mentioned that a watcher had the nerve to tell you that you are fat and that you should go on a diet! MY GOSH! Really !!! Someone would watch a show and then take the time to write out nasty words on a screen to someone who is out there trying to help people. You just have to wonder what causes that type of hate. I needed to boot up the computer and type to you... I AM SO SORRY YOU HAD TO READ THOSE words from someone in a painful life. Some positive words for you to read: THANK YOU...THANK YOU...for taking the time to do your show and for wanting to help others. You make a positive difference in people's lives. THANK YOU for being there for people.
Hi Susan, I'm Wendy, I live north of you (about 4 hrs across the border on Lake Huron, Ontario.Ca.) I just love your channel, found it 6 months ago.We have so much in common.I had a band in the 80's & 90's. I turned 70 on Apr 28th this yr. We're like sisters from another mother ( who I lost last Sept in her 98th yr.)
You have a gift for calming me down and making me feel there is a chance that I just may get some of my "Wonder Woman" back.I had to say goodbye to my 21 yr old cat that set me back so badly but you are getting me out there again,slowly but surely. I could write you a book ! Don't worry,I won't, I have a bad habit of making it all about ME! You are helping me break that habit. You are so welcoming and sincere I can't thank you enough, Susan. Love from a distant friend.❤ I know your son's wedding will the best it can be, enjoy every minute ,you deserve it! LOVE, LOVE ,LOVE your gown! Till next time, keep smiling. 👋🥳
What a treasure you are to reach out and touch so many women who are trapped in hopeless situations from their trappings that life has given them. God has used you as a blessing to them. Letting them know that all is not hopeless. It is a place we have to get to , to realize that life is not hopeless. God doesn't want us to be unhappy, grieving, and resigned to give up on life. He gives us courage to face each new tomorrow if we will turn it all over to him. God Bless you, for what you do, and all those who feel lost.
I have days of feeling “flat” too. I retired 8 years ago - and over time family and friends have either passed away or moved away. What I really have missed was buying new clothes and shoes to wear to work and other social events. Especially shoes ( shoe people will understand.) A few weeks ago I saw some really cute shoes I would have loved to wear to work ….and then I thought why not? So I bought them, and have hopes I’ll be wearing them soon. Nice to have anticipation again. Even at 73 I’m still a shoe lover. Love to you and Desi❤
Thank you so much for this 💜 You articulated about the numbness so well, it was super helpful. I’ve never heard it described that way before. I’m so sorry that you sometimes get mean comments, you’re the last person to deserve that. Big hugs to Desy 💕💕
There are so many ugly people that say ugly things. Don’t listen to them. You are such a beautiful person inside and out. Keep doing what you’ve been doing, you’re fabulous!
Sending hugs!
💜💜💜
You are a very beautiful woman inside and out! I have felt numb since my husband passed away suddenly in 2019. Nothing is the same. Thank you for your words and kindness…
I know, it's so hard when we lose our other half. They become pretty much our reason for most things, then when they are gone, we no longer have a reason. It's so hard. God bless.
Grief takes time, just allow it, then feeling will return. ❤
Susan, anybody that sends you a negative letter are just jelly of you and how far you’ve come. I think the Internet brings out the ugly in people.❤
I'm numb today and hope and praying tomorrow will turn brighter and better.
Hello Susan. You said it perfectly. I pray every girl who has had pain, by abuse, emotional neglect, being cut down, tossed to the wind, used for money or benefits, mistreated by pure disrespect, and no love or leadership will be blessed today to overcome what the enemy has decided to do to her. He comes to steal, kill, and destroy, BUT GOD! God is our wonderful Rock and He is our first Love and no man on earth can love us like he can. He can give us our hearts desire when we seek the man like him! The man that has a heart craving to please the Lord! He will know then the way to treat that treasured woman.
You look beautiful! You are a true inspiration.
YES!!! Preach it! You are wonderful!!!
I love the Queen Anne's lace at this time of year. Thank you for filming the field. This video went by so quickly, I was so absorbed and I think you offered some great advice with your own testament of what you went through. It is very very helpful. I encouraged someone else in the subscriber group, who has a very difficult life, discussed in the comments, to reach in and find a way to connect with others and even her own self to affirm herself for all the good she has done. It's surprises me how cruel some people are, or, least, how they are unable to empathize with another person's lot. This video is a warning flag for me just to be aware of my own motivations and feelings about myself and how I look and such. I've been very busy and don't go out when I'm going through busy times. But I do look forward to a time when I can travel and be out there again. I am still working and as I said before my mom just passed away so I'm settling up there. But I do enjoy the comments of the group and every video. That is a weekend friendship community connection!
My husband always wants me to go to church with him but I always tell him not today, but after this video I will say O.K. Thank you Susan
Thank you Susan for your insightful, thoughtful impute. Your opinion is so appreciated for myself and so many others.
You are a beautiful lady in all ways.
When my husband died l felt wounded and broken. But l had so much to do. When l lost him l lost my tenant, and my job too. My daughter lost the nanny for her kids. I spent five days a week at my daughter's place with the kids. On weekends l was at home with my cats and one grandkid. I had lots of admin work to do and a house to ready for sale. My whole life had to be reworked. I just moved forward, one step at a time. Years later l am busy but happy.
Anhedonia is a severe condition that describes a near-complete absence of enjoyment, motivation, and interest. A core feature of depression, clinical manifestations of anhedonia can include deficits in experiencing pleasure, approach-related motivated behavior, and learning how to match expectations to the environment. ❤
Thank you for introducing this. I'll ask my doctor about it. I can relate because of 3 very close deaths in only a couple years including my darling little dog. Whoever puts you down, just remember it's them who have the problem!
You're glowing and look so young!❤
xo to you and Dezi
I am learning all of this...I was shocked there was a name for what I felt...what I deal with at times...that dull ache that I am behind a curtain to protect myself...like burnout and a but of self-care...but not positive. It keeps me from the world! Much love to you!!! Susan
@LittlePoet
I have this and didn't realize it until you spoke about it. I'm going to mention it to my Dr. She said she can't find any good men here. I can't either. We're lonely and I feel it's dangerous for myself. I was Extremely social. Around the best men. Had many friends. Now nothing but me. I'm going into a depression I've never experienced
I have been suffering for years. Never knew about Anhedonia. I intend to ask my psychiatrist about it next appointment. Total lack of motivation. Some days I don't want to shower!!
.This is something different. I could see where you could think this is just depression! I don't even want to shower some days! T. Some days I donhank you for giving it a
name.
I so enjoy your beautiful videos; these are a pleasure to watch while listening the wisdom you share with us. I’m 68 and have been a widow for 10 years. I haven’t felt particularly numb, but I am aware that a large part of my life seems muted. I can feel frustration, disappointment and discontent stronger than I like but enjoyment is often dulled. Still, I have moments when I am enthusiastic and it’s when I am volunteering with my little dog, Eloise, as a Therapy Dog team visiting schools and the nursing home. Volunteering has been so healing but I still have work to do on myself when I’m alone.
Hello dear Susan!! Thank you for sharing your feelings of numbness with us!! Over the last few years I’ve alternated between feeling numbness and complete panic as I had to deal with a job loss and struggling with health issues and the anxiety of the pandemic. I often find myself feeling overwhelmed by my circumstances and numb to the beauty and blessings of my life. I know that I can’t continue this way. I’m learning to get out of my own head and realize how far I’ve come and how valuable I am as a woman. That’s why I love tuning in to your channel every week!! You help me to keep going and not give up on myself!! For that, I’m eternally grateful!! Take care of yourself, dear, beautiful Susan!! I’m looking forward to hearing about your son’s wedding and your joy!! Sending you, precious Desi and your family lots of love and prayers!!😍😍😍🙏🙏🙏
Oh wow!!! Susan, I didn't realize that I have been living numb!! Crap on rye, this sux😳!!! What the heck am I doing to myself??!!! I work hybrid, 3 days home, 2 in the office. I've stopped going for walks, going to the beach, going to my favorite book store, strolling through a mall, more importantly I've stopped going to church!! I've been doing church online...remote...like my job!!! I have become invisible by my own doing! I have become too comfortable with this blank existence 😔!!! Numb!!! I have become fricken NUMB!!! Susan, I am grateful to you for this vlog. It was a slap in my heart!! I've only myself to blame. By the Grace of Almighty God I have to wage war within my mind and spirit to free myself from numb! I'm 68 years old and I've lost me!!! Crap on numb!!! Good Lord, what am I doing to myself!!! If I have become this numb now, what's going to happen when I retire! Oh heck NO!!!
❤ Love you Susan. Sending you hugs from NJ ❤
I am 68 and so glad you posted this thankyou😊
Lost my husband almost 4 years ago I’m still grieving I always will he was the love of my life!😢❤
You look radiant today, just beautiful. I'll never understand what people get out of being so hateful. I work with the public and they can be brutal and feel entitled to be that way. Some days after work I just need to be alone and decompress from the day. Yes, many times I feel numb, bad divorce, death of parents, having to start over in my 60s ... life isn't always easy. The one thing I know God has given me favor and opportunities most people my age wouldn't have gotten. I may not have everything but I get by. Like scripture says I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I've had to remind myself of this often, it does help.
Wow! This describes me to a "T"!!! I lost my husband 8 yrs ago from brain cancer, but still miss him alot! Ever since he has passed, I feel empty, numb, joyless, etc. Especially this past year it really feels different! I have 3 kids but they seem to be too busy to care and I don't want to burden them so I keep alot of feelings inside of me. I would love to go see a counselor, but my oh my, they cost and I am also struggling financially. Some days I wonder what is my purpose anymore. Thanks for explaining the name for this feeling.
I don't pretend to know how you feel but I wonder if it would help to go out with a friend or two in a similar situation. Just to dinner or a hike or something. There has to be thousands of women who feel the same way. I wonder if they wish someone would ask them to go do something.
Yes, after my husband of 51 years passed away I felt numb for quite awhile. It has been almost 8 years, and I no longer feel numb, because 14 months ago I met this wonderful man. We were planning on traveling this summer together and then his work contract was extended 3 extra months, and I found out that I have a meningioma which is wrapped around my optic nerve of my left eye. So the traveling together this summer went right out the window. But....even with all this negative stuff going on, I do not feel numb. I am still optimistic about the future, because I have a good man to love, and love me. That makes all the difference in the world for me. Those who would say they'd rather be alone in their later years have no idea what someone special can do for your outlook on life, even when you are going through tough times.
Thank you Susan, you bring joy and warmth into our lives each week. ❤
I feel very invisible. I'm single...almost 56..I don't talk with my kids(I have 5) very often..maybe twice a year. I don't feel joy anymore...I go through the motions daily and I wish i could get that purpose back...that joy. Thanks for doing this episode...It has given me some solace that I'm not the only one. ❤
As a life long Buddhist I try to focus on the moment I am in right now. I’ve had a difficult life and have become wiser as time passed. I look for beauty and peace in each moment. I’m not perfect but I try…and that is enough. Love to you and Desi.❤
Exactly!
I lost my parents and then my husband. Grief.
I’m numb now because I don’t want to feel like that again!
I see beauty around me;
I function in my world but it’s not the same as when you have your whole life ahead of you.
I know I’m on the downslope. My body is changing and not for the better.
My mind is different, too.
Everything is getting harder.
There is a whole cadre of women who just want to be alone. I’m in that camp.
People annoy us!
I try to go out but then everyone wants to drink and party; I don’t drink anymore.
I don’t want that life anymore.
There are great UA-cam videos about people younger than me that just want to be at home!
In the garden!
Playing music!
Reading!
Watching you on UA-cam!
Thanks Susan , I lost my husband of 43 years ..almost 5 years ago just as we were heading into retirement . During this time my mom was in care with dementia and I also became numb . Life was a struggle and I Couldn’t feel joy and knew it was missing . I struggled to let myself cry and didn’t know why . Grief manifests itself in different ways and I Thankyou for your insight and compassion in explaining this . I still struggle but have found ways to create and feel joy again thankfully . Those hard times have given me a much bigger heart and the realization that joy is all around us ….we just have to let it in and not to be afraid to feel ! I work at feeling gratitude and positivity every day .
The best thing I did during this time was get myself a Dezi ….
I needed this today!
I survived cancer 5 years ago. Everything in my life changed, even where I lived ! I even look totally different because I lost my breasts and had the treatment that can age us and throw us into premature menopause( I’m 52 now. I was in my forties when I got sick).
It’s been so tough. Survival after illness can be very tough, even though I’m so grateful to be alive and healthy.
Anyway, I’ve often felt nothing in the last couple years and wondered why.
Your video is so beautiful and helped me a lot. Thanks❤
Dear Susan, my cousin who is 59 seems to be hoing through the same numb feelings. 🤔 She lost her husband last year, and her sin struggles with drug addiction and to top it off her daughter has a mental illness. She told me she cannot cry and feels numb and has no motivation. She is getting therapy now thank God. 😊 She has a beautiful soul and one of the most positive people I know. ❤️ Yes, being kind to ourselves and working through our pain and suffering instead of putting it in a box is so imprortant. There is no shame in crying and allowing us to grieve. However we need to be together and talk about what we are going through. Blessings to you Susan.
Thanks for sharing a new word with us-anhedonia. I know exactly how it feels and can relate. Thanks for all the time you spend taking beautiful pictures and sharing them with us. It is sad and lonely in the world and you bring a ray of hope.
I will be 70 this October and I am in my third marriage. My husband is 2 1/2 years younger than me. He had liver transplant September 2023 & it has changed him, FOR THE WORSE! He is chronically depressed and angry all the time now. Pre-liver transplant we had a really good marriage, which is NO longer the case. Now almost every morning when I awake, I grab my dog and we head outside and go for a walk in my beautiful neighborhood. I say hello to neighbors who are outside walking too, we smile, if only in passing sometimes we chat awhile. I talk to God, as I walk and remember to thank God for waking me up once again !! (A grateful heart is a happy heart). And as I write this I am asking myself, AM CURRENTLY NUM . . . alas, yes, I am. Susan, you posed a very thought provoking question.
Susan, you're the best. You always have a subject about REAL life issues. Sending you blessings and lots of love ❤️
Yes, I felt numb 20yrs ago when my dad passed, then 2yrs ago when I lost my mom, uncle, and my 69 yr. old brother within the same yr. The only thing that helps is my belief in God, and I know I will see them again. People that insult others are probably hurting inside themselves. You look amazing for any age!
Susan, what a great topic to discuss. Thank you! You and Desi are looking awesome! 😊💖💙 Hugs & love!
I want to write you a letter!!!! It will be a happy, deep, acknowledgment of you and how you have touched me. I just turned 59 and last week someone who is the sweetest, gentlest, most passionate man just showed up when I went to watch live music at a restaurant with dancing. I cannot believe it. I wrote down what my wish list of "what I want in a man" and I am getting most of those things and more I never could have dreamed of. There really are nice men out there who are giving, generous and kind.
Ask the universe for what you are desiring, then let it go, focus on you, hobbies, your pets, reading, singing, dancing, stay unattached to whether they show up or not, keep raising your own vibration and then they will show up. But, they will be more of what you need versus what you want because your higher self, God, your guides, they all know what you REALLY need.
The most wonderful videos, are made by Susan and Desi- I love everyone. Love- and good health my friend!
Yes. That's my belief too. I don't always know what's best for me. But the universe sends things that are even better! Intent. Send it out & wait for it to come, doing everything in your power in the mean time! Thank you for sharing.
Today's offering left me in tears at the strong identification I feel of these ideas and feelings. I appreciate you and your channel for taking on the raw, real, less than perfect side of authentic living.
Little Poet, I am isolating. I suffer from chronic pain & severe GI issues. Some days I can't leave the house. And days where I don't want to. I look like I am 7 months pregnant, the bloating is so bad. Don't want people to see me! This is chronic. It's not going away! My quality of life is far from what it once was. I have beautiful clothes that I can't wear. I wish I was numb. Wouldn't feel the pain! But my joy & passions are affected. I say the serenity prayer. I'm finding it hard to accept! Medicine is great for acute issues, but awful for chronic ones! I try not to complain,yet here I am! Thank you for allowing me to say how I really feel. Much love to you & Desi & all the lovely women on your channel. 💜🌻🏡📸
Please research NoCarbLife. It is a channel that is about Carnivore diet helping so many sick people. I can say My spinal pain is gone. Our Medical system has failed so many.
Thank you!
I was going to suggest that, too!
Low carb has helped me a lot.
OMG. Thank you Susan for talking about this today. Today I was talking to my friend about this issue. I bought a brand new car today every body was telling me congratulations and I felt numb to it! I even commented about my lack of emotion to my daughter because she was so excited about my new car. This video is the answer to a prayer I did today asking God to show me, what was wrong with me because I felt so emotionless. I labeled me a woman with a cold heart and questioned if that was normal. As a result of this group I would like to create a group where we can talk about this and heal, emotional healing. Anyone interested?
Hello there!! Thank you so much for being here! You really touched my heart! That numb feeling is hard to put into words...that " flat" feeling. We are not sad or depressed...we just are numb....for me, I do think it's from sweeping so many thing sunder the rug about losing so many friends...and not getting out enough and doing fun things just for me....I have never seen a group for anheronia before! There should be one!!! Loveot you always! Susan & Desi
What an excellent idea - All the best with the group!
I have lived with unresolved, complicated grief and trauma since losing my husband suddenly when I was just 47. It’s 11 years ago now but I’ve never moved on or accepted it. I had another relationship which was abusive. Since that ended two and a half years ago, I have suffered with crippling, life limiting anxiety and depression and have become totally numb, the only thing I can feel is pain and hopelessness. I’m now 58 and don’t see my life changing anytime soon. But I too am desperate to feel again, joy, pleasure, contentment and peace.
I have lived with depression & severe anxiety with panic attacks for many years. I see a psychiatrist & for me medication helps alot. It took awhile to find the right doctor & meds, but they definitely help. I had to change my thought process. I had to change many things about me. It was hard work but well worth it! Hang in there!
I mentioned this to someone else and I hope it is helpful: look at videos about EFT, or tapping. It is a way of breaking a cycle of thinking or despair. It has been helpful to me. It is free and it is something we can do for ourselves.
I'm finding that working 3 days a week with 4 young girls, teaching them life skills, laughing, and having that connection helps me since my husband died 4 years ago as of this August 1st, 2024.
Susan shame on the people who feel they can say the things they say to you. You bring so much to us each week and I enjoy looking forward to it. I lost my husband 21 years ago and feel numb in my retirement thinking this is when it would have been the greatest time to be together. Life is slower and some family member are gone and it would be nice to have him to enjoy the day with.
Enjoy your son’s wedding festivities and I will be watching to hear all about it.
Your Michigan friend.
Oh my gosh, you are so right! You made so much sense and are right on point. I am so very sorry for the negative comments of people who have no idea what true values are - so very sorry! Please accept my apologies for all those people. Thank you kindly for addressing this important topic. I don't know if you are aware of how many others you have helped to understand this, including me. I am sure that I speak for many, if not the great majority, when I say that you are a true blessing, an angel, and a gift from God. Honestly! I am so very glad I found your channel and subscribed. I just love your videos, every one of them that I've seen thus far and thank you from the bottom of my heart for being there. You'll always have my 'Like' 👍 ❤️
Yesterday i went to a funeral . The couple had been married for 39 years and he passed away one week short of his 67 th birthday . I have been single since 2010 . I cried a for about a month ate lots of haggen doz ice cream , drank lot of wine , i took a lot of baths , ate chocolate cake . Gained 10 pounds and said that is enough for me. I have never cried again not for us. Body shaming is NOT OKAY!!! Who ever body shames you hates themselves. You are gorgeous. STOP listening to vulgar people.
My BFF and I have talked about this subject - our stage of life (60’s) and not feeling true joy. We’re not unhappy, but we long for something to light us up! Don’t you think that a big part of it is we’ve already experienced all the “firsts” such as getting a drivers license, graduating high school/college, becoming an adult, marrying, having children, etc. At this stage now, we have to create our joy, but what is that? It seems elusive. I have reframed my thinking-I am blessed to have the freedom (post retirement) to choose anything that brings me pleasure, joy, happiness. Still it’s an ongoing search. It’s not that I’m unhappy, it just highlights this conversation-where is our joy at this stage? The great thing about us women is that we are strong and resilient and we will not stop searching. Power on, sisters! ❤
I 100% agree. At this stage of life we have accomplished many goals, we've experienced many joys and many sorrows but we're still here. It's up to us to find joy and a sense of purpose as we age. I would be lying if I said that I didn't get sad, depressed, and angry but I do my best to pull myself up and get going every day. I am grateful and thankful and I try to refrain from rehashing old hurts and issues. It's just not healthy. Cheers!
@@cwm5316 Yes, same! We can have depressive tendencies and still keep trying to find new joy and purpose at this stage. I’m pretty good at not looking back, and will continue to search for what lights me up now. Cheers to you too!
Yes I can so relate… I put one foot in front of the other but feel absolutely no joy in my life and nothing to look forward to.
Susan, blessed to be married 52 years to my best friend. Long ago, during one of my many times of feeling too large, not as pretty…whatever, he said, Ya know, a woman can be a 10, open her mouth and drop to a 3….and a woman can be a 4, and her personality , intelligence and joy will make her a 12. Never forgot that and now at 72 years young, he still looks at me the same adoring way. As women, we are often so hard and unkind to ourselves in ways we would never visit on others. You are such a compassionate and lovely woman. We see it even if you don’t.❤😊
Ohhh I almost passed the video by thinking I wouldn’t relate to this but YES, yes i do. I “braced” myself just yesterday for an emotionally charged visit with my son and his family (long story), just to get through it! Thank you for helping me cry again 🥰
Susan: Jealousy is an ugly thing displayed by ugly people. Those criticizing you can only wish they were as beautiful as you. You have such an outer and inner glow. Keep doing what you're doing. It's certainly working for you.
Thanks again for sharing. I think we all have times of feeling numb but I always tell myself to be thankful for what I have . Loosing my husband after all theses years has really changed me and I will never be the same person I was. There are things I would have enjoyed doing at 76 if he was with me but now never want to do them. I have my very first great grandchild coming in September and yes I look back on all he has missed and feel sad he never saw our grandchildren and now our great granddaughter but if I look forward I can be happy and excited about them. I have to make the choice of how I am going to look at things. It’s not easy but I really am overjoyed about going to be a great grandmother . I don’t want to miss out on the very Special gifts God has graciously allowed me to have. This may not make any sense to others but this is my way at trying to be grateful for what I have today.
Wow, you look amazing in your red halter. Your skin is so young looking! I remember feeling numb when I found out my live in boyfriend was going to be a dad! I distinctly remember trying to numb my brain with straight vodka, it didn’t work (as I’m not a drinker 😂). This was in the 80s. And was a huge turning point in my life. It set me on an amazing path that led me to the US and my amazing husband. We will be celebrating our 21 year anniversary this Oct. I’m turning 63 this month and find joy in nature, travel, family, my cats. A beautiful sunrise, a full moon, so many things. It does make me sad too that people don’t feel joy.
I'm 76 and my ex husband just died a few months ago and my daughter rented a house to have a memorial for him. I was so afraid to go, have gained so much weight, let myself go,
and was so afraid to see old relatives that I haven't seen in years. I prayed so hard and went and even though I felt like a wreak, everyone was so loving, giving me hugs right and left.
I'm so thankful to God and was able to share some things about him that I loved and appreciated. It is sad though, like you, I've been wondering "if only", but I'm thankful not to have
any bitter feelings towards him, try to remember the good times, thankful to have been married and experienced having children, even though it didn't work out. I appreciate your encouragement ❤
I love to cook...
So I cook or I bake and I share a little with my neighbors sometimes....this beings me joy, it forces me to socialize a little, and it puts a smile on Everyones face !!!
Let's face it as we get older we all have pain and grief and we all have lost someone we love.... You cannot dwell on it.... And the best way to put joy in your life is to do something for someone else!!!!
At this age we have all had pain sorrow and lost someone we love..... That's life, you can't dwell on it.... The best way to put Joy back into your life is do something for someone else!!!
Susan, I love your music. I want to buy an album of yours. People say the most terrible things to you. Some people are so small. You are a beautiful person. Thank you for being here. ❤
For the last, at least 8 yrs I've felt this way. I couldn't tell you the last time I felt excited or why. Its not even depression, it's just....nothing. Life is so hard.
I've been numb for sure. Just released from hospital and trying to get stronger. Seeing you and little Desi is always inspiring. Have a great week. Love you.
I was shocked when you said someone said … why don’t you lose weight? How rude and wrong! Last week when you were modeling your dresses … I thought you looked wonderful in them! You actually have a waist! I sure don’t! I am 76 soon 77 and was always tall and thin! Then middle age hit … I gained that dreaded additional weight around my middle and shrunk my height by 3.5”!
As Dean Martin would say in one of his songs, Isn’t that a kick in the head? 😮
You certainly do not look 70! Okay …. I’m better … really upset me someone would write that!🥰
Wonderful Vlog … Desi is SO handsome!
Till next week girlfriend …! 🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️❤️🇺🇸🇺🇸
I've never seen any comments that she's fat.
You are beautiful...thank you for what you do love listening to you
I am considering going to grief support due to so many deaths of loved ones the past two years. I'm tired of feeling numb; that's the way I've felt before. If I start crying, I won't be able to stop. I'm going to seek out friendships because I do love being around people. I don't have much interaction with people. I'm pretty isolated and I m tired of it. I've made myself ill by doing this. I'm 73 and I'm starting over. I'm going out whether I want to, or not!❤❤❤❤love you Susan. I know you'll be so happy going to the wedding. Have fun!
Way to go, Elaine!
YOu take care of yourself...I am so sorry for all your loss. Your life is vibrant with much to do...my love to you, Susan
Dear Susan, I began watching this afternoon after telling my boss (I work from home online) that I just could not do any more today. I am back in bed. A place I have been so much in the last few years. I look forward to all your videos and count on you to get me through, to give me reflection and perspective. I was able to be given a short ride through my small town just 2 evenings ago and did not feel this numbness. I felt bewilderment and shock. All the people and places are gone now that I grew up with and all the families that knew each other. It was surreal. And then I came home and numbed out again. But what you talked about, that deep lack of emotion is a place I crawl into to escape all my past and current pains. Over and over and over. It really is too much to go into here, because there is so much. But this feeling of no feeling is worse than all the strong currents of my younger years. Because I realize I've lost myself. I am not "me" anymore. I don't feel as if I am anybody. I don't feel real. I AM that 69-year-old you spoke of who says, "I just can't". And I don't. I am an introvert, but still I used to be social and outgoing and fun. I have tried antidepressants. I've tried cleaning and rearranging what I have. It's not enough. I wish I could get over this awful humiliation and embarrassment about how old I look now. But it goes deeper than that. I feel no worth. Your topic for this video is so very relevant and has deep roots in societal outlooks on an older woman's place in a society that glorifies youth. It has to do with a loss of those groups of women who got together. There is an epidemic of loneliness in women in this country/across all age groups. But it's our generation who remembers what women had at one time. Each other. Thank you for doing this video.
After reading these comments about not feeling the joy of life for so many people, I feel very sad. Wonderful people who have given so much of themselves to others but now feel forgotten or an afterthought. We were there when our parents, in laws and children needed someone. We drove sick family members to the doctor, brought over a hot meal to a niece or friend that just had a baby. We never forgot to send a birthday card. We did it out of love, it was our pleasure to help out. In some ways we were teaching the younger generations the importance of family. I think much of that connection is gone, family members scattered all over the country. I live alone after divorcing my abusive husband. My children live in three different states. My other family members live over an hour away.
We all have cell phones and computers, it could be so easy to stay in touch. We get busy with work and day to day activities, we don’t take the time to communicate. Then that person has died. What a small thing to have called that person to say hello and what joy that person would have received from a simple phone call. It is no wonder so many of us have lost the joy of living.
❤
Yes a phone call from a friend can mean just so much. In a world of such technology, communication is rare. Saying that seems strange.
You are soo wonderful! You inspire me more than you will ever know.
I don't know when I felt true joy the last time. I go through the motions of living. I am the sole caretaker of my sister who is 56. Her children won't help her or me. I am just numb from all the exhausting work. There is no time for me. Your videos are a god send! I look forward to them every week. Hugs!!
My dear lady, I work for a woman who cares for her sister. And I want you to know that I hear you loud & so very clear. And I am praying for you. I hear & see so many of your longings. 🙏🏻 God bless you.
So sad that there are people who try to find “life” by making mean comments.
What a sad existence. Feeling powerful by attempting to tear someone down. I love how you spoke about it. Not letting them win. Thank you. ❤
You are my Saturday evening anticipation.
Comfortably numb I think it’s a song 🎵 so you’re not alone. Try to look at the sunny side of life ❤
You look so dewy and beautiful. You are not overweight. You inspire so many.
Sometimes you just get sick of people & family constantly judging you, and negative conversations. I've started chanting positive chants, and it has been a blessing for me, surrounding myself with joy, music, and nature. Love yourself & accept the beauty in the moments. Thanks for sharing, so many lovely products, and the red polka dot dress looks extremely good on you. Desi adorable 🥰 Love y music 🎶