This is an episode for the ladies. Women: if you're single, and you don't want to be, you may want to consider going back to school. I don't mean graduate school. I mean investing time, energy, and money into learning what makes men tick. Time to earn a PhD in men. In the absence of real understanding, women's only recourse is to the cliches and banalities that will just get them more of the same. Knowledge is power. Buy my book, "The Value of Others" Ebook: amzn.to/460uGrA Audiobook: amzn.to/3YfFwbx Paperback: amzn.to/3xQuIFK Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Subscribe to my newsletter: oriontarabanpsyd.com Social Media TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@oriontaraban Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Orion's Theme: ua-cam.com/video/WrXBzQ2HDEQ/v-deo.html Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. Become a Stellar affiliate and earn a 10% commission for every membership purchased by a new student you conduct into the program: stellargre.tapfiliate.com. GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: ua-cam.com/channels/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw.htmljoin Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #women #relationship
Dr. O women don't even really need that much coaching. I just watched your three part episode series on “getting and keeping any man you want” and it worked great. Didn't cost me anything and the videos are only a total of about 50 minutes long.😅
@DewiSant-o3y but they don't understand why they're successful and that leaves them at liability to be very unsuccessful in the future. Eg Tom Brady, Brad Pitt, etc
As a woman, I've often reflected on how many of us focus on the idea that men don’t understand us. We put so much energy into wanting to be understood, but how often do we invest that same energy into truly understanding them? This realization struck me a few years ago, and since then, I've immersed myself in studying male sexuality and male psychology through various books. Thank you for sharing this video, Orion-I truly appreciate it!
Dated my wife for 10 years before I realized she had no idea what boys, adolescents, or men are. Had to essentially finish "raising her" on what guys and girls diff on. Literally took her through anthropology starting 800,000 years back, the concept of marriage, religious influence, female intrasexual competition, male social dilemma, the whole nine yards. Took 3 months, she had lots of questions - good, bad, ugly, beautiful - it's all a web stitched together from man to woman to man to woman. It was fun, then I got to hell her my life story and what my experience was with women including her. It was tears start to finish, i didn't mean for it. But we married, and its been 15 years since we met. She tells me "I knew it was ganna be rough ride when you started with the fact that 20 minutes after your born they cut a piece of your dick off while strapped to a chair and we go from there." - tough stuff but hey a good wife wants to emotionally heal you, and boy does it help guys a lot.
Women know how to get men. Look attractive, be nice, and give out physical intimacy. The problem women have is to trying to lockdown the perfect man. A Chad who is monogamous, a bad boy who will be a good dad, a rich guy who has lots of free time, a confident guy who is not cocky, a masculine guy who is emotionally vulnerable.
No a lot of them don’t know how to do the basics anymore. They’re doing self-mutilation with tattoos and piercings. They’re often terrible at physical intimacy. They already made it acceptable to be fat like 10 years ago. Open your eyes. Men are accepting too much nonsense.
@MonessaLeighA Chad is a top 10% man in your preferred category of men. You are correct that women are self-sabotaging at unprecedented levels. There’s no such thing as perfect of course. That’s part of the problem.
Haha yes I got the bad boy who's a good dad. Married 12 years next Friday. But no man or woman is "perfect" and to set that expectation is where they go wrong.
Talking about those kind of platitudes reminded me of a sign i saw that said, "Everything happens for a reason: Sometimes the reason is you're stupid and make bad decisions." Ha, ha
You’re advice is great!! I think it helps being a middle aged divorced woman (who takes care of herself) to be able to admit you carry much wisdom in this arena. I encourage women not to let your advice frustrate but rather, educate! Btw your audio book was magnificent! Thank you!
In his book, the value of others, which I highly recommend, he covers the different value curves for men and women. Women are best to attract and commit to a high value man when they are young, ideally 20-25 years old. For men, it’s best to wait, ideally for them, find a solid high value (e.g., unused) woman in his 31-38 year old range. However, men hold value until about 60-65 if they stay in shape, women? It lasts until about 42-46 if they stay in shape and no children and none wanted. That’s in his book, so don’t hate on me for sharing.
@Savvynomad225 unless you have a ton of money, I guarantee you no attractive young woman will look at you after 45 and that's only if you look somewhat decent.
@@jodali11 if you are a zeroed out divorcee, true. If you have built a career and made smart financial decisions, most men can have a good amount of money/assets by 45. In the general sense of things, most men are better off not having most women come into their life anyways; wisdom grows as we age and we learn that bringing an "anchor" into our lives isn't all it's cracked up to be. Rentals are much more feasible and as Orion has covered many times, they offer a man the option to choose what he likes and get his needs met at a much lower cost overall.
THIS! Whymen rarely actually have solutions to problems. They sit around complaining for men to solve the problems. This is why getting advice (romantic, life, etc) from them is pointless. It's rarely advice that they have tried out themselves. The only advice I would even consider is from individuals who are giving me advice from a professional perspective in areas they are skilled in. For example, getting accounting advice from a whymen who is a CPA. Very straightforward. But when it comes to life advice or dating? I don't recommend it.
We do but the dating coaches tell us to ask you all for help because men like to feel needed. The solution is to need you and so we must figure out ways to ask you for help with things we may or may not already know about to help men feel needed.
The most helpful advice I have ever received in regard to having a successful relationship with a man was from: My dad, my older brother, and my mother. - My dad taught me how a man should treat me. - My brother taught me how I should treat a man. - My mother taught me how to keep a man.
@@Ninie02fanofall Dad: - A man should take care of you like I have taken care of both you and your mother. - A man who berates you, degrades you, disrespects you, and/or makes you feel unsafe in any capacity is no man worth loving or respecting. - A man should make sure that you are happy, healthy, and loved. - A promiscuous man is bad news. A God-fearing man is on his toes. (Not everyone is religious, but I found this advice to be extremely helpful in vetting men) Brother: - A man likes a woman with a level head and a collected emotional state. If possible, take genuine interest in his interests. He will be excited to have a woman who shares even a few of his passions with him. - Don’t make his life hard. Find a way to make his life easier, or at least bring his life peace. - Don’t argue with him openly. There is room for disagreements and discussion privately. - Do not disrespect him in front of his friends. There is no greater sin in the eyes of a man. Mom: - Speak highly of your man to him, and even when you are away from him. - Never, ever, EVER, speak lowly of your man to your friends. This makes them grow resentful towards him, as well as make the relationship easier to bring down. Find an honest person you can confide in who wants to support you as well as your relationship. - Sex for a man is one of the most important things you can give him. Be with a man whom you will eagerly seek to sexually gratify. - Be a happy woman. No man wants to be with an unhappy and bitter woman. - Do everything with him, if he will have you, even if it’s just to go to the gas station. -Apologize to him, even if he feigns ignorance (“I have no idea what you’re talking about, honey!”). Your seeking for forgiveness will bring him closer to you. My final word: Do these things for him and he will be going no where, because he knows no other woman will fck him, respect him, and love him the way you do.
You are LUCKY! Family. I will also do my best to teach my daughter all these, or at least my share. Therefore avoid her having total useless assholes ruining her youth.(having her ruining her youth with total useless assholes), and have worthy relationships with men and women, find her good place in society.
@@Ninie02fanofall my reply is gone for some reason🤨 Here it is again (hopefully to stay) Dad: - A man should take care of you to how I have taken care of both you and your mother. - A man who berates you, degrades you, disrespects you, and/or makes you feel unsafe in any capacity is no man worth loving or respecting. - A man should make sure that you are happy, healthy, and loved. - A promiscuous man is bad news. A God-fearing man is on his toes. (Not everyone is religious, but I found this advice to be extremely helpful in vetting men) Brother: - A man likes a woman with a level head and a collected emotional state. - If possible, take genuine interest in his interests. He will be excited to have a woman who shares some of his passions with him - Don’t make his life hard. Find a way to make his life easier, or at least bring his life peace. - Don’t make fun of him, his friends or his interests openly. There is room for disagreements and discussion privately. - Do not disrespect him in front of his friends. There is no greater sin in the eyes of a man. Mom: - Speak highly of your man to him, and even when you are away from him. - Never, ever, EVER, speak lowly of your man to your friends. This makes them grow resentful towards him, as well as make the relationship easier to bring down. Find an honest person you can confide in who wants to support you as well as your relationship. - Sex for a man is one of the most important things you can give him. Be with a man whom you will eagerly seek to sexually gratify. - Be a happy woman. No man wants to be with an unhappy and bitter woman. - Do everything with him, if he will have you, even if it’s just to go to the gas station. -Apologize to him, even if he feigns ignorance (“I have no idea what you’re talking about, honey!”). Your seeking for forgiveness will bring him closer to you. My final word: Do these things for him and he will be going no where, because he knows no other woman will fck him, respect him, and love him the way you do.
@@josealexi5141 Each in their own way. Higher SMV men, meaning the men women would truly want, run game on women something fierce - to an extent no woman would ever be capable of. The other men contract out the game to culture/society who pressure women into settling for them (the "nice guys 50/50 Beta Bobs) since the species wants maximum reproduction, regardless from whom. That too is a game. All life is a game. The trick is to not let the gamers trick you too badly, and that includes social norms and myths.
@josealexi5141 and so many men say tired of men's games. If the "games" are obnoxious that's one thing...if a guy has a good game going and is kind guy (I didn't say "nice") then great. Same with women
Orion's reputation is growing. As his influence grows, so does the influence of his videos. It is a good thing that he made the video. It had to be made.
If this applies to all the women you know, then you're the common denominator. There's something about you that attracts the wrong women. But keep generalizing and looking outward.
@@darkpatches it applies to our mothers, daughters, sisters, co-workers and cousins. I guarantee I am not _"attracting"_ any of those women. Nice try, tho.
This is a shockingly true video and I hope more women will watch this. Michael Sartain talks about this very thing all the time. He states that women in general have no idea about self improvement. They suddenly have loads of unearned marketplace value the moment they finish puberty whereas men need to go out and self improve and accomplish things to have value in the sexual marketplace. So the concept of self improvement to them is completely foreign. They might think “I should probably lose weight so I look better”, but they usually don’t and justify it with the platitude you mentioned - “well, he should just love me for me” or some other similar bs.
Not only that: the longer they believe they "should" get a man without having to put in the work the older, more bitter, resentful, and entitled they become. So instead of doing like a few years of work (if even that let's be honest) they spend upwards of a decade expecting what they want to fall out of the sky. It's so shortsighted and the only thing stopping them from getting what they want is their pride
All I need do is walk into a Barnes and Nobles and check out the 'relationship' section and the self help section. Almost all of it non business related is aimed at women. I think you better think it out again
@@flydye45and nearly ALL of them are books full of BS platitudes that he mentions here. Maybe watch this again. This is the advice that is typically given. Lots of “advice” telling them that they’re enough just the way they are. Don’t believe me? Go check out these books yourself.
@@flydye45 reading about something is not the same as doing it. I can read about how to become a millionaire that doesn't mean I'm gonna become a millionaire
This is single handedly what turns me off instantly with dating women of today. No recipocation, no attentiveness in attempting to find out I want, or just what men want in general in any aspect. Whether it be hobbies, sex, likes/dislikes...and I know they dont do with thier exs because I implicitly hear it when they're talking about their past relationships. The entitlement/egoism/narcisissm is so off-putting that Im looking to cut them off after ~ 2 weeks. And most of the time, I will stick my neck out and "rizz" her up if she has a decent persona, or if it gets that far - meaningful dates, tangible interest. They dont care, they dont know. I would say majority of guys can count on two fingers how many women they've encountered that showed a reasonable level of attentiveness/recipocation without prompt.
Yup. That's what macro changes in power do. In cultures or times where men dominate, it's the other way around. No one - neither men, nor the culture at large - cared about what the woman wanted or what actually might have pleased her. The assumption was that simply being married fast, furious and early, and becoming a mother should be more than pleasing, since the alternative was starvation and spinsterhood shaming from the community.
They just assume men just want sex and or children depending upon age. And to be fair it is at the top of the list for most men. The mistake they make about the guys that are actually willing to commit, is that sex is the only thing we want. It use to be the case that women came with a default set of desired features but the modern woman is a very striped down model with few, if any, extras. They are like buying a used car that has a whole lot of underlying problems.
@@roses6564 Isn't what women want today similar to what they were "given" in the past? I'm strictly referring to a relationship/dating context, although what I'm saying will still hold in other context as well. How does compromising conflate with what either sex wants, and value of exchange involved? I think you're trying to pose the argument that whenever a party is in power, or has the advantage, either will position themselves to give less while getting all of what they want.
@@Lex_Lugar A system where men must cater to women's desires more than the opposite generates hoeflation. Women charge way more for what they bring, with little to no regard for what a man wants. And Orion subtly pointed that out.
The problem is that even the average women think they are super models.. .. so there are no commitments from men.. Just keep paasingnthem around until women realize men value
I’m about to get my doctorate after watching this video! You can call me Dr. Stacey😏 I appreciate these videos. It’s sad because most of us women think men should automatically know what we want, but have no real knowledge of what men want. But both men and woman can benefit from these types of videos. We aren’t born knowing what the other really wants and needs. We think we do because of society. Lord only knows it should def be taught! No one should have to be a mind reader or even worse just assume.
"Why won't men put in effort to learn to give commitment and be loyal"...Because you don't have to "learn" anything to be loyal, and being loyal doesn't make women attracted to you. So if you're clearly loyal up front, you'll NEVER get far enough for commitment to even be on the radar.
Exactly. There isn't a shortage of men who are willing to commit and be loyal. The problem is that women overwhelmingly want the most attractive men who have tons of options and who therefore have far less incentive to be loyal to one woman.
Alison Armstrong has a PhD in men. I've been listening to her for a while and she has really helped me understand them. But I like to understand a man, through a mans eyes as well. Grateful for your page.
What women need to do is simple: 1) Find a man worthy of submitting to. (he should have the qualities: strength and competence) 2) Submit to him. (let him be the leader) How to keep your man happy: 1) Feed him 2) Have s3x 3) Show respect by appreciating his contributions and by not being argumentative 4) Leave him alone when he wants to be left alone
Give a woman a woman a man to marry, and you helped her fit in society (often grudgingly). Give a woman a man she deems worth submitting to, and you made her ecstatic and perfectly willing to do all of the above with a smile on her face and a cherry on top. When women argue about any of the above is because they end up with men whom they do not see as worth submitting to, at the primal level. The more things change, the more they stay the same.
I would have liked some clues/ references for information, though I realize that's not required here: 😮 the message is crystal clear and fits with the profile of a man I was seeing recently
No, even older. We're back in the olden times. Back when one dude would have like 2000 concubines and most women did not enjoy themselves. They were pretty happy back in the '50s actually. @@elainer8288
@@elainer8288 It isn't "unbelievable." Listening to, taking his suggestions seriously, respecting him, looking up to him, appreciating what he is, etc. That's part of "submitting." Don't be an insufferable stickler. No one's asking you to do the Handmaid's Tale.
Men have always been interested in figuring women out even though sometimes it doesn’t seem like it. But regardless if they do or don’t, it only serves you a benefit to learn about the gender you’re interested in.
@@mavrk.d that shit starts and ends when males are teenagers. They grow out of that sweet curiosity about how woman think and how thier bodies work/ feel ect. They all become mechanical and dull at best. Then they get an idea that thier in charge but won't take over any responsibility, just wants his woman bowing to him so he doesnt feel the sting of his unimpressive life that he is responsible for and bitter about. So he wants to stand on his woman's back to feel like a big man for a moment. It's actually pretty disturbing Yeah, no thanks...
FWIW, women in foreign countries have plenty of game. From my experience, Latinas (e.g. Colombian women) have some of the best game in the world. It's quite astonishing how they're able to get what they want by giving men what men want. So obvious, but women in the Anglosphere wont do it. It's like they view that behavior as the female version of simping.
I have 8 years of experience in Colombia and speak very good spanish. Most of these women do not have game. It’s become really trendy to overrate colombian women. Many of them think in terms of prostitution but don’t think they are prostitutes. I just had one tell me she wants a man that gives her money and gifts but also wants to work another job and she wants that man to be loyal. LOL this girl is unemployed with few prospects. I have also had women take 2 hour bus rides to meet me and give me sex on the first date. You get all types of women in Colombia. Problem is American women are fat and super busy being working their lives away. So Colombian women look better by default. Cheaper dates anyway.
Their game is money motivated and eventually gets them killed. The number of femicide cases in Colombia is huge (done by grinos and colombian men as well). The Anglosphere does not need that.
The same that put something in your drink in order to leave you naked, disoriented, hurt and with no money. Good luck dealing with thise treacherous b*tches
I recently dated a woman who had done a module in men in her Women's Studies degree. Yeah, she was really clued up and therefore totally shocked when I left. :)
I’ve spent the last three years since my divorce trying to understand healthy men and how they operate, because I really want a relationship that stands the test of time. It’s been illuminating and interesting. Also, I don’t know if it is manipulation to try to understand the opposite sex to give them what they want, unless you’re using what you know to hurt them. But the more I’ve come to understand men and treated my boyfriend the way he wants to be treated, the better our relationship gets
As a woman I do not always agree with his message but I agree fully with this one. I'll add that losing weight and staying fit would help women tremendously when trying to get a man to commit. I know it's an unpopular opinion but most men will do ANYTHING for a thin women (unless he's black as they prefer larger and curvy women mostly). Men are pretty simple and most really want you to be in shape.
The big issue here is that women are being given a reality check, being brought back down to earth and most awkwardly they are being held accountable. Hats off to every single lady out there with substance of character who can and will soak this up so she can increase her value and make herself less of a liability to the opposite sex. Welcome to a man's world...
If you were to approach a guy and provide him a complement on something he is wearing, it would do wonders for you. Most men never get approached, so once the initial shock wears off they will chat you up
@@marte1376 But this is about men that you do want. Many men are not right for intimate relationships with women, and many more would not be right for you.
@@markaurelius61 hard lesson in life is that even the men you want not necessarily are the good ones for you. Putting pride aside is something that must be seen with nuance
@@marte1376 Yes, there are no guarantees. I have the radical idea that what is needed is something between Indian style arranged marriage and our current system would work better
@@markaurelius61 well definitely. Me as a woman just threw out the window of the idea of marrying for love. Marriage is a business, it's a contract and in general spending time with someone should be for my best interests and of course his. Total different mindset. However I enjoy the uncertainty of what's going to happen in my dating life
Well Orion, I think you're right as far as you go on this, yes, men go to a lot of effort to understand women, but I don't hear much about women making a similar effort to understand men. But women do go to a lot of time, effort and money to look good, let's not forget that and we love it when they do. But what you don't say is what things a women can do to understand and attract men. In my own experience, a women should be happy and playful. A warm understanding smile really helps. Of course he must find her attractive, but if he does, that smile can work magic. And of course not being difficult helps a lot too. If she can put a smile on your face . . .
Amidst all of this .. I would love to see a video about how to make the process Enjoyable again because I’m one of those that no longer enjoy the so-called “Game” even if it what it needs to be done, to me it always feels childish and like pointless acting and not an investment
Marriage Material Short List from Random Guy Go to the gym 3+ days a week and be a healthy weight. Trust and respect my ability to figure things out and guide our life in the world. Be open to my sexual fantasies. Understand the importance of your responsibilities in the relationship no task is beneath you. Honesty Fix your mental health if needed. Best of luck ladies! I hope everyone can earn what they want.
You do realize you need to please a woman in bed also, if you want her to fulfill your sexual fantasies right? It goes both ways. Nothing worse than selfish man in bed. If a woman constantly feels like she's being used for sex and she's not getting orgasms, I promise you she'll leave pretty soon and find a man who knows what he's doing.
Decent list but as the guy or leader the ability to figure things out and lead has to be questioned from time to time and the leader should be able to explain their thinking in terms their woman understands You have to consistently show and give her a reason to follow your lead because imo that’s the only cure for their anxiety
I understand that you mean well, but women can NOT fix their mental health in a manner which renders them suitable for marriage, whereas they were previously unsuitable for such. Women do not "emotionally heal" from bad relationships, especially flings with more attractive men who left them "stuck at her highest setting". These are not just red pill cliches, they are absolute truth. And evidence of these truths can be observed in women's private conversations with their fellow female friends.
In my experience and in knowing some of the happiest couples in marriage that I have had the good fortune to know …. there never was any game playing or manipulation just respecting and understanding each other from the dating stage till many years into marriage raising families. No one was a drop dead beauty or a die hard committed man but when the time was right all things happened.
I'm divorced. I've never stopped loving my ex at some level, but I've thought many times that she should have read the "owner's manual" for a man before getting married.
It’s super important to self reflect and not constantly look at what a man should do , but what about women? I have zero issues getting men to want to commit to me. Never had that problem! But I also learn and read about men and what they want !!
Orion just recommended that women go get coaching to learn more about men. Problem is that women will get coaching sometimes, but it will likely be from another woman match-maker type. How can a woman learn more about how men operate when they are only willing to listen to other women who also have never learned how men think? This video is a truth bomb for women, which is why they won't take the message to heart. It's really sad. I have a female coworker who might benefit from watching this video, but I'll never send it to her because she may get offended.
Hmm I thought we aren’t supposed to ask a fish how to catch a fish. That’s what they say about women don’t ask a woman what she wants these random men on internet know better.
@michellesmith7363 Ahhh, but that's thinking like a woman. Asking a woman what she wants never works because women don't think about it. Rather, they FEEL something for a man and then act on it. On the other hand, men act based on logical thought, so if you ask a man what he really wants, he'll be more than happy to tell you what's on his mind provided that the woman makes it clear that nothing he says will offend. This is a fundamental difference in how men and women are wired. One more thing.....if a man asks a woman what she wants, it's clear that he expects the woman to be "thinking" like he does, which shows his lack of understanding in regard to how women operate. 😆
@@christopherfernandez8153 you are correct that men and women are very different. I do tend to self reflect a lot and look at patterns in things but also I can change based on how I feel. A lot of what is said on these channels I don’t agree with though. Like saying for men to treat women poorly and they will want you or women want bad boys not nice guys I think the issue more is trying to lump women all into the same pot of preferences, a lot of these things indicate a woman has trauma like wanting someone that treats them bad.
The major takeaway is that when men use game to get a woman, the women are not appreciative but when women use their ways to get a man we are grateful.
I think there are plenty of women out there that know how to get a man but wont "lower" themselves to accomplish it. When you are god's gift to men, there will never be a reason to learn. For women who actually want a man, they are getting bad advice around every corner...and here we are, prefering to die alone than ever having to please another person in any way.
Please note: women have been trying to learn men but let’s be fair both sides have been getting some very shitty advice and we’re just finally coming to terms, thankfully this channel and others are here to help 😊
I've always said young women (teenagers) should be busy with "Men's Studies" - in the sense of knowing how, what and why to pick early on, and to maximize their own value for most favorable picking. Unlike men, we don't have the luxury to wait, to "sleep on it," to hedge our bets, develop "optionality," and such. If there is a true natural female disadvantage/underprivilege, this is it. What men don't get is that not all women in their prime (teen and early twenties) can achieve the potential of that prime without conscious intervention. They may be young and fertile, but that doesn't necessarily mean at the peak of their attractiveness. Men often conflate attractiveness with fertility, which doesn't mean they are attracted to homely young&fertile chicks. Many women are late bloomers, look awkward at the theoretically "prime" age, still clueless about how to set off their best traits. Some are still battling baby fat, others just the modern fat, which they still don't know how to keep at bay, etc. Later some lose the weight and the "pretty" finally comes through, but then they're also late 20's, if not 30's. So the Situation must be tackled methodically, with science, dedicated studies and lots and lots of timely self awareness. Otherwise, settling or indefinite singlehood are guaranteed, along with eventual marital dissatisfaction. This is because for women, the quality of the relationship and how actually satisfied they are with it is "make or break": the most important part of life. But nobody tells them that, on the contrary, there's a lot of denial. Both schools of thought lie to women. The Progressive's holy grail is the Career, the Traditionals urge them on Family at any cost (regardless of optionality for partner selection). It's neither. For women, marital/relationship satisfaction makes or breaks life. Everything else is secondary, and yes, that includes children and family.
We know optimal results need conscious efforts, its not rocket science. And we all know most young women dont know this because we see them go for all the wrong men. Bottom line is teach your kids to be capable of handling unconfortable truths and not seek conforting lies. Im sure men do it too but from my personal experience, every women are like that. On a couple occasions, I had girls being somewhat offended because when asked I told them they were 'cute'. ONLY CUTE ?!. My conforting lies wasnt even enough... because they were average, just like me 😅
"They may be young and fertile, but that doesn't necessarily mean at the peak of their attractiveness" YES, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT IT MEANS!!. I don't understand why women keep gasligthing themselves with that. Men's interest in women is MOSTLY due to sexual attraction, which is basically about percieved signs of youth and fertility. Females inmediately post-blooming have the strongest signs of, unsurprisingly what they are; young and fertile, and non-coincidentially, so are their eggs. So yes, a male is going to be interested in that age bracket due to biological reasons. Once again; men are NOT complicated
@@j.davila4523 Yes and the woman must be very involved in studies about how to enter the right man's life. Otherwise, if they focus too much on setting up their own life, which is what they have been advised for decades now, they lose.
@@vipondiu Yes, but that still doesn't explain why men are not exactly attracted to young, fertile and homely women, unless we talk about "any port in a storm" type situations. Those can easily get pregnant and give birth too - and yet many remain invisible to many men, let alone higher SMV men. Young and fertile women can easily be unattractive due to a general lack of knowledge about how to present themselves in the world. This includes traits like weight or even the type of personality/vibes that attract guys. FACT: aesthetics and fertile appearance are two distinct realities. There are aesthetically gorgeous 40+ yo women and there are derriere-ugly teens and early 20's women too. Evidently, men who want to set up a family would obviously not be interested in the former category for that particular purpose (duh). However, virtually all would remain very much interested in a glorious encounter (or several).
I appreciate your straight no chaser content while reading the comments. I’m not single but I would like to implement some of your tips with my man. I can always improve and don’t feel like I know it all. Some of the truths are quite honest and that’s frankly what I need. Thank you to you and those that commented. :)
There is nothing funnier than female self help. Self Gaslighting is a better description. When I upped my game I watched all the Mens and Women's dating advice and 'going to the gym, maintain beautiful female friends and learn to be comfortable talking to pretty girls' beats all 'guys like confidence, get your PHD and set boundaries' BS from the other side.
As a woman I completely agree, I have been learning a lot recently about male psychology, and it has been eye opening. There is still a lot I don't understand though. For example; I ended a relationship last year with a guy who told me I wasn't meeting his needs in the relationship, but then he also told me he wanted to marry me???
My husband is the one who helped me to find out that I suffer from BPD and what you said in this video is so true. My husband invested so much time in me and I am forever grateful. We found a great Dr to work with me and I am a working progress! You are right so many women complain about their men but I am always the one asking them "what are you contributing in your relationship?" Thanks dr😊
well… as has been pointed out long ago, one (as self-respecting gent) may either understand xx.s (as for their, eg evo.psych, nature) OR love them. the cognitive dissonance implied in trying both is not bearable.
This is by far the most misogynistic video Orion has ever made. The nerve to ask something, anything from women is just so unfair. The level of effort suggested in this episode could kill many women who try, even in the slightest. You go queen!
Bless you Orion. I probably have my Masters degree in women. Still working on my PHD after 2 marriages, divorce gra*e, and being alienated from one of my kids. I have 3 grandchildren I haven’t met. I’ve learned, among many other things, womyn and romantic relationships are NOT worth ANY effort. They have earned their loneliness and cats.
I came here to learn how to get a man and listened to this whole video just for you to tell me why I should be doing what I’m here already doing and to get a book?
Are you sure, you made me listen again? He’s talking about men, not talking to men. He’s explaining how men learn to attract women to explain how much effort is required to get what you want.
Sure that was pretty straight up. And that is why I'm watching your video right now. And I have been doing things differently except I guess I need to go out into the public more often. Lol I think if I get involved in some activity or volunteering or a class or something I will meet more people. Pretty commonsensical.
Women don't necessarily want commitment! I learned it the hard way! And women don't want loyalty! I learned that the hard way too! I don't know if they don't want commitment form me! Or I don't know if they want loyalty from me! And don't know how to test that 😥.
Oh, heck yeah they want commitment! Just because you offered it and she didn't want it doesn't mean they don't. They just may not want it from you bc you may the doung something wrong or fishing in the wrong pond. In fact, the more eager a guy is to offer commitment, the less they want it...bc why would he be so willing and eager to commit? Think about it! For your own sake, tame that down. And good luck!
Sounds like you're fishing in the wrong pond like previous poster said. Date the girls who like you the most and pick your favorite from that pool to commit to.
Hey Orion! I love your content, but I think you are making a basic mistake. You are talking to a woman as you would talk to a man. Most of my female friends that I have shared your videos get triggered in a bad way, then when I take time to explain what you said in a very very very subtle and soft way they agree anyways. You are barking to a cat. Love you and fantastic book, definitely on my top 5 ever.
Good comment. But I think he may be trying to be blunt in order to break through some of the noise. But I agree, they have to watch a few episodes. I also highly recommend his book.
Great! New relationship conversation; “You know if you are looking for a long term relationship you are going to need to use some manipulation to get that. If you are not looking for that but some fun, then we can get started right now either way. I’m game, let’s go”.
Most of social media has both sexes just complaining about the opposite sex. Here men have an advantage. There are more places for men talking about solutions.
@@Savvynomad225 I strongly disagree. Waiting is way too passive. I have been putting in the work for the past 8 years on myself and on women, and I have been seeing abolutely AMAZING results. 10 years ago, I was depressed and couldn't get any woman, literally. Now, I am being called a hunk by multiple attractive women and I am having more sex than ever before! Orion's message is true: if you put in the work, results will follow automatically.
Bro I’m 28. Never in my life did I want to sleep with just one woman. Actually at age 16 my dream was to make it to the nfl so sleeping with multiple woman would be easier. But never in my life did I have a goal of having a 1 body count.
@@doyoueatrocks You want commitment and loyalty from hot h0es only, that's why you're not getting it, because you're looking for it from the wrong type of women.
@@pj_saiti7808 Poor you. Your comment is one of the most insecure and miserable things I've read in a long time. Must be horrible hating yourself that much to let yourself reach that low.
Its not that women don't know about men, it's that they don't care what men want or what we think. They feel like they shouldn't have to do anything and they should just get what they want.
All of society holds that men SHOULD give women what they want, or else they're bad people... while concurrently, women owe men nothing. IOW, Society hates you.
And why would they not? They do get away with it, don´t they? Until they don´t. Then it´s the crying game about how they are not seen as they are over 40 years old and how superficial everyone is.
Thanks Dr. Taraban, your videos have really helped me to realize my own worth in relationships as well as some great perspectives on dating in the modern world. Thanks for what you do and sharing this information in easy to digest nuggets.
The reason I have been following Orion is exactly because I've been studying men. Reading the comments sections is helpful in getting an understanding of men as well. Although the men from here mostly represent men that are starting to or have lost their enthusiasm in finding a long term committed partnership.
Man you were doing so great until the very end where you say “put your pride to the side” … we all know women can’t do that. And that is the reason they will not put in the effort.
It's crazy how many comments are from people saying there should have been more advice for women on how to understand men. My dudes and dudettes, the advice "learn what men want" is about putting in some actual effort. That's it! A little while back a girl was beaming interest and positive vibes at me, I almost melted. That slightest touch of effort was super effective!
After watching this channel for over 1 year,, I have came to a conclusion to stay single, enjoy my sports,, stay healthy and avoid the drama of females,, plus I have saved a shit load of money,
I used to have a gay boss who, to establish a rapport with me, would often point out women whom he found to be attractive. Invariably they were tall, broad shouldered, athletic, had a nice car, a nice house in a nice neighborhood, were highly educated, rich, and were from an important family. My grade for his insights into what straight men find attractive? F
Wow, for the majority of guys, that's wayyyy off.. Most men aren't after a single one of those things. Not one of those is on my list. Closest one is athletic, but even then, I'm not looking for athletic necessarily, just a healthy looking figure. I'm after pleasant females, kind, nurturing. I could care less what kind of car she drives, and broad shoulders would scare me.
Why don't people study how to be a better human for the sake of themselves and in order to have a deeper connection with others? Why is this such a shallow and manipulative game? This paradigm is a spiritually vapid and an existential dead end. Super bleak.
There is no more prominent theme in Orion's entire oeuvre than this: committed relationships are transactions where people try to extract the most while giving the least possible. The whole Sting ethos of "if you love someone, set them free" - yeah, that's love. That's about giving - and giving without resentm...oops, I mean expectations. People who seek committed relationships are not seeking to love, they are seeking to GET. Period.
@@chipsteveI think we ALL fantasize about a relationship that’s just two people giving everything to each other without expecting anything in return. Unconditional love and devotion sounds amazing. But as I approach 50 years old, my experience is that while a relationship may start out feeling that way, _eventually_ people start to have expectations of their partners. If those needs or expectations go unmet (for either party) for too long, the relationship will inevitably end. My take isn’t that Orion reduces all relationships to transactional affairs. Rather, he acknowledges the hard truth none of us really like to admit: Relationships take work, and if we can apply our efforts in the right direction and on the right things, those efforts will pay huge dividends in the form of security, happiness, and a lasting affection. If I know that my partner feels really special and loved if I bring her some flowers, and she’ll be happy the rest of the day, why not just do that for her? First because I love her, but second, because it also makes MY life better. I can choose to resent her for “needing” something, or I can be thrilled that I know what she needs and that I’m able to provide it.
Yeah yeah. The spiritual talk as if our bodies don't have necessities. The problem with spiritual talk is that the reward is in he other side, after you're dead. Can you imagine? Good luck with that
@@chipsteveLove has been used as a fulcrum for thousands of years to leverage strawman conclusions laced with ad hominem. The tradition continues. You are attempting to refute Orion’s book in a single paragraph. Rather, I encourage the intellectually more rigorous effort of engaging his complex chapter on Love and refuting his points individually, if you can, rather than using the ‘Love’ label as a plastic gunrest for sniping at his oeuvre. Not many here will appreciate cheap pop-shots at the author.
The thing with this is that it goes against society’s messaging of women being perfect just because they’re women and any man no matter how successful or top tier he is should be lucky to get any woman no matter how low and unattractive she is. For example this goes against the body positivity movement because a man should accept a woman and be attracted to her no matter how overweight she is.
Yeah I noticed that too. I think the point was to study men as hard as men study women and figure out what men actually want, not what you think they want or should want . I always sort of joked with myself that I've probably got a masters in psychology from trying to be attractive to women. Probably not too far from the truth that I do have a masters worth of knowledge at this point.
What women need to do is simple: 1) Find a man who is worth submitting to. (he should have the qualities: strength and competence) 2) Submit to him. (let him be the leader)
@@chimera2116 False. The West has fallen precisely because gender dynamics have disintegrated into carnal, hedonistic games for sex and money; there is no ancestral nor communal accountability towards mate selection. The only way to change the system is to live by example. Succumbing to others' mediocrity will get you nowhere.
Oh, believe me - there would be lots of gnashing of male teeth if women actually did take the time for a PhD in Men to figure out how to get the men who really suit them and those they really want - or nothing. Your mistake is to believe that if women studied hard on this topic, they would become enlightened enough to want guys like you instead of Glorious Chads. They wouldn't. They might become more self-aware earlier about their own needs and more selective in terms of which type of guy could meet those needs long term - but all in all, they would certainly not change preferences from Glorious Chad to 50/50 Beta Bob just bc they graduated with a PhD on Men.
Wrong. There are a select few women who already do this and that’s why they’re winning and the rest are all losing. And that’s why they have the negative outlook and attitude Orion speaks of in this video. They’re losing and are bitter about it but don’t want to change anything about themselves. They make it a breeze for the rest of us.
The entire relationship section in the book store is geared for women. What are you talking about? Every woman I know has a library of relationship books, podcasts, coaches, etc. I don’t know any men reading relationship books, etc
@@Ozzy-Mag I’ll give you that. Half the problem is men give advice they would like to be accurate but women give advice they actually experience working. For example- male coaches all suggest sex for everything and the female experience is the opposite. Husbands all over the world are cheating on their grade A wives for fat sloppy prostitutes just bc they crave “strange” or new and it’s not a lack of being fit and easygoing.
I am watching so that I can learn something about men. Also, I am try to listen to what men I know have to say about their relationship habits without judgement so that I can try to win over one particular man. Hopefully, it's working.
I wish this video had actually taught me something practical / applicable. My problem has been that there's a lot of material out there - but most of it sucks or just isn't accurate.
This is an episode for the ladies. Women: if you're single, and you don't want to be, you may want to consider going back to school. I don't mean graduate school. I mean investing time, energy, and money into learning what makes men tick. Time to earn a PhD in men. In the absence of real understanding, women's only recourse is to the cliches and banalities that will just get them more of the same. Knowledge is power.
Buy my book, "The Value of Others"
Ebook: amzn.to/460uGrA
Audiobook: amzn.to/3YfFwbx
Paperback: amzn.to/3xQuIFK
Book a paid consultation:
oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations
Subscribe to my newsletter: oriontarabanpsyd.com
Social Media
TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@oriontaraban
Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/
Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks
Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban
Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com
Orion's Theme: ua-cam.com/video/WrXBzQ2HDEQ/v-deo.html
Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com.
Become a Stellar affiliate and earn a 10% commission for every membership purchased by a new student you conduct into the program: stellargre.tapfiliate.com.
GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993
Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community:
ua-cam.com/channels/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw.htmljoin
Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com
Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #women #relationship
what makes you assume women don't learn about men? baseless assumption
@@FF-vc6msthey're obviously not. Source: man
Dr. O women don't even really need that much coaching. I just watched your three part episode series on “getting and keeping any man you want” and it worked great. Didn't cost me anything and the videos are only a total of about 50 minutes long.😅
@DewiSant-o3y but they don't understand why they're successful and that leaves them at liability to be very unsuccessful in the future. Eg Tom Brady, Brad Pitt, etc
@DewiSant-o3y yeah, we need to see what Dr Orion’s dating life looks like. He gives great advice, but did he actually land and marry a 10?🤔🤣
As a woman, I've often reflected on how many of us focus on the idea that men don’t understand us. We put so much energy into wanting to be understood, but how often do we invest that same energy into truly understanding them? This realization struck me a few years ago, and since then, I've immersed myself in studying male sexuality and male psychology through various books.
Thank you for sharing this video, Orion-I truly appreciate it!
Nice, can i get your contact xd
Dated my wife for 10 years before I realized she had no idea what boys, adolescents, or men are. Had to essentially finish "raising her" on what guys and girls diff on. Literally took her through anthropology starting 800,000 years back, the concept of marriage, religious influence, female intrasexual competition, male social dilemma, the whole nine yards. Took 3 months, she had lots of questions - good, bad, ugly, beautiful - it's all a web stitched together from man to woman to man to woman. It was fun, then I got to hell her my life story and what my experience was with women including her. It was tears start to finish, i didn't mean for it. But we married, and its been 15 years since we met. She tells me "I knew it was ganna be rough ride when you started with the fact that 20 minutes after your born they cut a piece of your dick off while strapped to a chair and we go from there." - tough stuff but hey a good wife wants to emotionally heal you, and boy does it help guys a lot.
Can you Share some of the books thanks
to re-use a phrase - 'You go girl!' (thumbs up)
Maybe try understand Urself first
I sometimes forget that he also helps women.
💜
He helps everyone.
@@Gabriel_Silva520 I love him that's why!
Women typically ignore him though. They hate the mansplain
@@Savvynomad225they are too proud to accept anyones advice. They think they know it all
Saying what needs saying. Bravo.
Women know how to get men. Look attractive, be nice, and give out physical intimacy. The problem women have is to trying to lockdown the perfect man. A Chad who is monogamous, a bad boy who will be a good dad, a rich guy who has lots of free time, a confident guy who is not cocky, a masculine guy who is emotionally vulnerable.
That's actually a really good little list of unicorns. (Donkey here, unfortunately.)
"Women know how to get men" no they don't. By virtue of having a wet box they get men, no skill or knowledge required. Sheesh.
No a lot of them don’t know how to do the basics anymore. They’re doing self-mutilation with tattoos and piercings. They’re often terrible at physical intimacy. They already made it acceptable to be fat like 10 years ago. Open your eyes. Men are accepting too much nonsense.
@MonessaLeighA Chad is a top 10% man in your preferred category of men. You are correct that women are self-sabotaging at unprecedented levels. There’s no such thing as perfect of course. That’s part of the problem.
Haha yes I got the bad boy who's a good dad. Married 12 years next Friday. But no man or woman is "perfect" and to set that expectation is where they go wrong.
Talking about those kind of platitudes reminded me of a sign i saw that said, "Everything happens for a reason: Sometimes the reason is you're stupid and make bad decisions." Ha, ha
Yup
You’re advice is great!! I think it helps being a middle aged divorced woman (who takes care of herself) to be able to admit you carry much wisdom in this arena. I encourage women not to let your advice frustrate but rather, educate! Btw your audio book was magnificent! Thank you!
Alison Armstrong is another strong psychologist in this area. Her breakdowns of our communication styles is the best I’ve seen
In his book, the value of others, which I highly recommend, he covers the different value curves for men and women. Women are best to attract and commit to a high value man when they are young, ideally 20-25 years old. For men, it’s best to wait, ideally for them, find a solid high value (e.g., unused) woman in his 31-38 year old range. However, men hold value until about 60-65 if they stay in shape, women? It lasts until about 42-46 if they stay in shape and no children and none wanted.
That’s in his book, so don’t hate on me for sharing.
According the these men you're expired, so whatever you do it's too late for you lol they lust only for youth.
@Savvynomad225 unless you have a ton of money, I guarantee you no attractive young woman will look at you after 45 and that's only if you look somewhat decent.
@@jodali11 if you are a zeroed out divorcee, true. If you have built a career and made smart financial decisions, most men can have a good amount of money/assets by 45. In the general sense of things, most men are better off not having most women come into their life anyways; wisdom grows as we age and we learn that bringing an "anchor" into our lives isn't all it's cracked up to be. Rentals are much more feasible and as Orion has covered many times, they offer a man the option to choose what he likes and get his needs met at a much lower cost overall.
Helping women…means he’s helping men 🙏. We got this. Team humanity.
Do women ever have conversations about solutions to problems?
Of course not lol. It's all about venting, not about finding solutions. Or, perish the thought, about changing anything 😂
That’s what we rely on y’all for 😂 TF
THIS! Whymen rarely actually have solutions to problems. They sit around complaining for men to solve the problems. This is why getting advice (romantic, life, etc) from them is pointless. It's rarely advice that they have tried out themselves. The only advice I would even consider is from individuals who are giving me advice from a professional perspective in areas they are skilled in. For example, getting accounting advice from a whymen who is a CPA. Very straightforward. But when it comes to life advice or dating? I don't recommend it.
We do but the dating coaches tell us to ask you all for help because men like to feel needed. The solution is to need you and so we must figure out ways to ask you for help with things we may or may not already know about to help men feel needed.
Depends on their emotions, it changes minute by minute
The most helpful advice I have ever received in regard to having a successful relationship with a man was from: My dad, my older brother, and my mother.
- My dad taught me how a man should treat me.
- My brother taught me how I should treat a man.
- My mother taught me how to keep a man.
Can you share details and examples? Thanks !
W familly x1000
@@Ninie02fanofall
Dad:
- A man should take care of you like I have taken care of both you and your mother.
- A man who berates you, degrades you, disrespects you, and/or makes you feel unsafe in any capacity is no man worth loving or respecting.
- A man should make sure that you are happy, healthy, and loved.
- A promiscuous man is bad news. A God-fearing man is on his toes. (Not everyone is religious, but I found this advice to be extremely helpful in vetting men)
Brother:
- A man likes a woman with a level head and a collected emotional state.
If possible, take genuine interest in his interests. He will be excited to have a woman who shares even a few of his passions with him.
- Don’t make his life hard. Find a way to make his life easier, or at least bring his life peace.
- Don’t argue with him openly. There is room for disagreements and discussion privately.
- Do not disrespect him in front of his friends. There is no greater sin in the eyes of a man.
Mom:
- Speak highly of your man to him, and even when you are away from him.
- Never, ever, EVER, speak lowly of your man to your friends. This makes them grow resentful towards him, as well as make the relationship easier to bring down. Find an honest person you can confide in who wants to support you as well as your relationship.
- Sex for a man is one of the most important things you can give him. Be with a man whom you will eagerly seek to sexually gratify.
- Be a happy woman. No man wants to be with an unhappy and bitter woman.
- Do everything with him, if he will have you, even if it’s just to go to the gas station.
-Apologize to him, even if he feigns ignorance (“I have no idea what you’re talking about, honey!”). Your seeking for forgiveness will bring him closer to you.
My final word:
Do these things for him and he will be going no where, because he knows no other woman will fck him, respect him, and love him the way you do.
You are LUCKY! Family. I will also do my best to teach my daughter all these, or at least my share. Therefore avoid her having total useless assholes ruining her youth.(having her ruining her youth with total useless assholes), and have worthy relationships with men and women, find her good place in society.
@@Ninie02fanofall my reply is gone for some reason🤨 Here it is again (hopefully to stay)
Dad:
- A man should take care of you to how I have taken care of both you and your mother.
- A man who berates you, degrades you, disrespects you, and/or makes you feel unsafe in any capacity is no man worth loving or respecting.
- A man should make sure that you are happy, healthy, and loved.
- A promiscuous man is bad news. A God-fearing man is on his toes. (Not everyone is religious, but I found this advice to be extremely helpful in vetting men)
Brother:
- A man likes a woman with a level head and a collected emotional state.
- If possible, take genuine interest in his interests. He will be excited to have a woman who shares some of his passions with him
- Don’t make his life hard. Find a way to make his life easier, or at least bring his life peace.
- Don’t make fun of him, his friends or his interests openly. There is room for disagreements and discussion privately.
- Do not disrespect him in front of his friends. There is no greater sin in the eyes of a man.
Mom:
- Speak highly of your man to him, and even when you are away from him.
- Never, ever, EVER, speak lowly of your man to your friends. This makes them grow resentful towards him, as well as make the relationship easier to bring down. Find an honest person you can confide in who wants to support you as well as your relationship.
- Sex for a man is one of the most important things you can give him. Be with a man whom you will eagerly seek to sexually gratify.
- Be a happy woman. No man wants to be with an unhappy and bitter woman.
- Do everything with him, if he will have you, even if it’s just to go to the gas station.
-Apologize to him, even if he feigns ignorance (“I have no idea what you’re talking about, honey!”). Your seeking for forgiveness will bring him closer to you.
My final word:
Do these things for him and he will be going no where, because he knows no other woman will fck him, respect him, and love him the way you do.
Modern Western Women: "We're *TIRED* of the games!"
Also Modern Western Women: won't respond to a guy who doesn't have "game"
There will always be "game" on both sides.
@@roses6564 except 90% of women run game on men and only 10% of men can run game on women.
@@josealexi5141 Each in their own way. Higher SMV men, meaning the men women would truly want, run game on women something fierce - to an extent no woman would ever be capable of.
The other men contract out the game to culture/society who pressure women into settling for them (the "nice guys 50/50 Beta Bobs) since the species wants maximum reproduction, regardless from whom.
That too is a game. All life is a game.
The trick is to not let the gamers trick you too badly, and that includes social norms and myths.
@@josealexi5141 this psych doesn't haven't game, js... follow his words if u will
@josealexi5141 and so many men say tired of men's games.
If the "games" are obnoxious that's one thing...if a guy has a good game going and is kind guy (I didn't say "nice") then great. Same with women
This episode is a scream in the void. Women don't seek improvement, they shift the blame.
yessssssss
Orion's reputation is growing. As his influence grows, so does the influence of his videos. It is a good thing that he made the video. It had to be made.
Now you know why they mostly lean left
If this applies to all the women you know, then you're the common denominator. There's something about you that attracts the wrong women. But keep generalizing and looking outward.
@@darkpatches it applies to our mothers, daughters, sisters, co-workers and cousins. I guarantee I am not _"attracting"_ any of those women. Nice try, tho.
This is a shockingly true video and I hope more women will watch this. Michael Sartain talks about this very thing all the time. He states that women in general have no idea about self improvement. They suddenly have loads of unearned marketplace value the moment they finish puberty whereas men need to go out and self improve and accomplish things to have value in the sexual marketplace. So the concept of self improvement to them is completely foreign. They might think “I should probably lose weight so I look better”, but they usually don’t and justify it with the platitude you mentioned - “well, he should just love me for me” or some other similar bs.
It’s because that’s what happens for them. They literally do nothing and get worshipped
Not only that: the longer they believe they "should" get a man without having to put in the work the older, more bitter, resentful, and entitled they become. So instead of doing like a few years of work (if even that let's be honest) they spend upwards of a decade expecting what they want to fall out of the sky. It's so shortsighted and the only thing stopping them from getting what they want is their pride
All I need do is walk into a Barnes and Nobles and check out the 'relationship' section and the self help section.
Almost all of it non business related is aimed at women.
I think you better think it out again
@@flydye45and nearly ALL of them are books full of BS platitudes that he mentions here. Maybe watch this again. This is the advice that is typically given. Lots of “advice” telling them that they’re enough just the way they are. Don’t believe me? Go check out these books yourself.
@@flydye45 reading about something is not the same as doing it. I can read about how to become a millionaire that doesn't mean I'm gonna become a millionaire
As a woman I highly recommend to start with your book “The Value of Others”. It personally helps me a lot. I’m still learning though.
This is single handedly what turns me off instantly with dating women of today. No recipocation, no attentiveness in attempting to find out I want, or just what men want in general in any aspect. Whether it be hobbies, sex, likes/dislikes...and I know they dont do with thier exs because I implicitly hear it when they're talking about their past relationships. The entitlement/egoism/narcisissm is so off-putting that Im looking to cut them off after ~ 2 weeks. And most of the time, I will stick my neck out and "rizz" her up if she has a decent persona, or if it gets that far - meaningful dates, tangible interest. They dont care, they dont know. I would say majority of guys can count on two fingers how many women they've encountered that showed a reasonable level of attentiveness/recipocation without prompt.
Yup. That's what macro changes in power do. In cultures or times where men dominate, it's the other way around. No one - neither men, nor the culture at large - cared about what the woman wanted or what actually might have pleased her. The assumption was that simply being married fast, furious and early, and becoming a mother should be more than pleasing, since the alternative was starvation and spinsterhood shaming from the community.
They just assume men just want sex and or children depending upon age. And to be fair it is at the top of the list for most men. The mistake they make about the guys that are actually willing to commit, is that sex is the only thing we want. It use to be the case that women came with a default set of desired features but the modern woman is a very striped down model with few, if any, extras. They are like buying a used car that has a whole lot of underlying problems.
🎯💯
@@roses6564 Isn't what women want today similar to what they were "given" in the past? I'm strictly referring to a relationship/dating context, although what I'm saying will still hold in other context as well. How does compromising conflate with what either sex wants, and value of exchange involved? I think you're trying to pose the argument that whenever a party is in power, or has the advantage, either will position themselves to give less while getting all of what they want.
@@detroitvcw Yes, that's what the argument is.
Guy just explained hoeflation.
Well, there is a lot more to it, but he definitely pinned the entitled attitude down.
He did not explain hoeflation. I don’t think you know what that means.
@@Lex_Lugar A system where men must cater to women's desires more than the opposite generates hoeflation. Women charge way more for what they bring, with little to no regard for what a man wants. And Orion subtly pointed that out.
The problem is that even the average women think they are super models.. .. so there are no commitments from men.. Just keep paasingnthem around until women realize men value
Oh lordy
I’m about to get my doctorate after watching this video!
You can call me Dr. Stacey😏
I appreciate these videos. It’s sad because most of us women think men should automatically know what we want, but have no real knowledge of what men want. But both men and woman can benefit from these types of videos. We aren’t born knowing what the other really wants and needs. We think we do because of society. Lord only knows it should def be taught!
No one should have to be a mind reader or even worse just assume.
Beautifully said. 100% agree with you. Back to school! :)
"Why won't men put in effort to learn to give commitment and be loyal"...Because you don't have to "learn" anything to be loyal, and being loyal doesn't make women attracted to you. So if you're clearly loyal up front, you'll NEVER get far enough for commitment to even be on the radar.
That's the problem with society and the source of male loneliness
Exactly. There isn't a shortage of men who are willing to commit and be loyal. The problem is that women overwhelmingly want the most attractive men who have tons of options and who therefore have far less incentive to be loyal to one woman.
Alison Armstrong has a PhD in men. I've been listening to her for a while and she has really helped me understand them. But I like to understand a man, through a mans eyes as well. Grateful for your page.
What women need to do is simple:
1) Find a man worthy of submitting to. (he should have the qualities: strength and competence)
2) Submit to him. (let him be the leader)
How to keep your man happy:
1) Feed him
2) Have s3x
3) Show respect by appreciating his contributions and by not being argumentative
4) Leave him alone when he wants to be left alone
Give a woman a woman a man to marry, and you helped her fit in society (often grudgingly).
Give a woman a man she deems worth submitting to, and you made her ecstatic and perfectly willing to do all of the above with a smile on her face and a cherry on top.
When women argue about any of the above is because they end up with men whom they do not see as worth submitting to, at the primal level.
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
Submitting to? Are we in the 1950's? Wtf? Unbelievable.
I would have liked some clues/ references for information, though I realize that's not required here: 😮 the message is crystal clear and fits with the profile of a man I was seeing recently
No, even older. We're back in the olden times. Back when one dude would have like 2000 concubines and most women did not enjoy themselves. They were pretty happy back in the '50s actually. @@elainer8288
@@elainer8288 It isn't "unbelievable." Listening to, taking his suggestions seriously, respecting him, looking up to him, appreciating what he is, etc. That's part of "submitting." Don't be an insufferable stickler. No one's asking you to do the Handmaid's Tale.
Men have always been interested in figuring women out even though sometimes it doesn’t seem like it. But regardless if they do or don’t, it only serves you a benefit to learn about the gender you’re interested in.
T-Rex wants to hunt.
@@mavrk.d that shit starts and ends when males are teenagers. They grow out of that sweet curiosity about how woman think and how thier bodies work/ feel ect. They all become mechanical and dull at best. Then they get an idea that thier in charge but won't take over any responsibility, just wants his woman bowing to him so he doesnt feel the sting of his unimpressive life that he is responsible for and bitter about. So he wants to stand on his woman's back to feel like a big man for a moment.
It's actually pretty disturbing
Yeah, no thanks...
FWIW, women in foreign countries have plenty of game. From my experience, Latinas (e.g. Colombian women) have some of the best game in the world. It's quite astonishing how they're able to get what they want by giving men what men want. So obvious, but women in the Anglosphere wont do it. It's like they view that behavior as the female version of simping.
I have 8 years of experience in Colombia and speak very good spanish. Most of these women do not have game. It’s become really trendy to overrate colombian women. Many of them think in terms of prostitution but don’t think they are prostitutes. I just had one tell me she wants a man that gives her money and gifts but also wants to work another job and she wants that man to be loyal. LOL this girl is unemployed with few prospects. I have also had women take 2 hour bus rides to meet me and give me sex on the first date. You get all types of women in Colombia. Problem is American women are fat and super busy being working their lives away. So Colombian women look better by default. Cheaper dates anyway.
They don't understand that they are also simping. After guys out of their league with tons of options and zero incentive to wife them up.
Can confirm, 10/10 accurate. ;-)
Their game is money motivated and eventually gets them killed. The number of femicide cases in Colombia is huge (done by grinos and colombian men as well). The Anglosphere does not need that.
The same that put something in your drink in order to leave you naked, disoriented, hurt and with no money. Good luck dealing with thise treacherous b*tches
I recently dated a woman who had done a module in men in her Women's Studies degree. Yeah, she was really clued up and therefore totally shocked when I left. :)
Now they get their information from bitter wahmen on sh!ttock😂
I’ve spent the last three years since my divorce trying to understand healthy men and how they operate, because I really want a relationship that stands the test of time. It’s been illuminating and interesting. Also, I don’t know if it is manipulation to try to understand the opposite sex to give them what they want, unless you’re using what you know to hurt them. But the more I’ve come to understand men and treated my boyfriend the way he wants to be treated, the better our relationship gets
So how do women actually get what they want from men? The whole video is like an introduction to some wisdom which is yet to come
“By learning”. i.e putting in effort to understand Men. How they are wired and what makes them tick.
Doing the extra mile to research
Great content! You're right about women investing in knowledge that will help them succeed in their relationships with men.
As a woman I do not always agree with his message but I agree fully with this one. I'll add that losing weight and staying fit would help women tremendously when trying to get a man to commit. I know it's an unpopular opinion but most men will do ANYTHING for a thin women (unless he's black as they prefer larger and curvy women mostly). Men are pretty simple and most really want you to be in shape.
being in shape is the single most impactful thing a woman can do for her attractiveness
The big issue here is that women are being given a reality check, being brought back down to earth and most awkwardly they are being held accountable.
Hats off to every single lady out there with substance of character who can and will soak this up so she can increase her value and make herself less of a liability to the opposite sex.
Welcome to a man's world...
Book recommendations to learn what men want/like?
@@omshantiiify look up Alison Armstrong. She’s the best I’ve ever seen at explaining the differences in how our brains work & how we communicate
If you were to approach a guy and provide him a complement on something he is wearing, it would do wonders for you. Most men never get approached, so once the initial shock wears off they will chat you up
Also, change the style of learning. Men have become more reclusive as a result try finding practical classes that put you in the wild! Goodluck!
Just ask me.
His book, the value of others! It’s the best I’ve read about these things
"Ladies: Put your pride aside" - that is the summary of whole video, and the part that is not likely to happen in our culture in its present climate.
Some men aren't worth it to me suffering in my nervous system. Some men want game, and call it pride, if you don't feed into it, you let it go.
@@marte1376 But this is about men that you do want. Many men are not right for intimate relationships with women, and many more would not be right for you.
@@markaurelius61 hard lesson in life is that even the men you want not necessarily are the good ones for you. Putting pride aside is something that must be seen with nuance
@@marte1376 Yes, there are no guarantees. I have the radical idea that what is needed is something between Indian style arranged marriage and our current system would work better
@@markaurelius61 well definitely. Me as a woman just threw out the window of the idea of marrying for love. Marriage is a business, it's a contract and in general spending time with someone should be for my best interests and of course his. Total different mindset. However I enjoy the uncertainty of what's going to happen in my dating life
Wish i could like this video 3 times. Never have i heard such a strong truth about this and in such a clear way. Thank You so much Orion!
Well Orion, I think you're right as far as you go on this, yes, men go to a lot of effort to understand women, but I don't hear much about women making a similar effort to understand men. But women do go to a lot of time, effort and money to look good, let's not forget that and we love it when they do.
But what you don't say is what things a women can do to understand and attract men. In my own experience, a women should be happy and playful. A warm understanding smile really helps. Of course he must find her attractive, but if he does, that smile can work magic. And of course not being difficult helps a lot too. If she can put a smile on your face . . .
I educated myself (with my brothers help) on how not to get used by a man. Education done.
Amidst all of this .. I would love to see a video about how to make the process Enjoyable again because I’m one of those that no longer enjoy the so-called “Game” even if it what it needs to be done, to me it always feels childish and like pointless acting and not an investment
Your honesty is very rarely spoken.
Marriage Material Short List from Random Guy
Go to the gym 3+ days a week and be a healthy weight.
Trust and respect my ability to figure things out and guide our life in the world.
Be open to my sexual fantasies.
Understand the importance of your responsibilities in the relationship no task is beneath you.
Honesty
Fix your mental health if needed.
Best of luck ladies! I hope everyone can earn what they want.
You do realize you need to please a woman in bed also, if you want her to fulfill your sexual fantasies right? It goes both ways. Nothing worse than selfish man in bed. If a woman constantly feels like she's being used for sex and she's not getting orgasms, I promise you she'll leave pretty soon and find a man who knows what he's doing.
Decent list but as the guy or leader the ability to figure things out and lead has to be questioned from time to time and the leader should be able to explain their thinking in terms their woman understands
You have to consistently show and give her a reason to follow your lead because imo that’s the only cure for their anxiety
Be open to YOUR sexual fantasies (whatever they may be) but she's the one who needs to fix her ... um, mental health?
I understand that you mean well, but women can NOT fix their mental health in a manner which renders them suitable for marriage, whereas they were previously unsuitable for such. Women do not "emotionally heal" from bad relationships, especially flings with more attractive men who left them "stuck at her highest setting".
These are not just red pill cliches, they are absolute truth. And evidence of these truths can be observed in women's private conversations with their fellow female friends.
I check these off. About the sexual fantasies I'd have to know them first 😂 I don't like being peed on 😂
In my experience and in knowing some of the happiest couples in marriage that I have had the good fortune to know …. there never was any game playing or manipulation just respecting and understanding each other from the dating stage till many years into marriage raising families. No one was a drop dead beauty or a die hard committed man but when the time was right all things happened.
I'm divorced. I've never stopped loving my ex at some level, but I've thought many times that she should have read the "owner's manual" for a man before getting married.
The effort is always expected to come from Men - it’s exhausting! You’re my hero Dr. Taraban!!!
It’s super important to self reflect and not constantly look at what a man should do , but what about women? I have zero issues getting men to want to commit to me. Never had that problem! But I also learn and read about men and what they want !!
Orion just recommended that women go get coaching to learn more about men. Problem is that women will get coaching sometimes, but it will likely be from another woman match-maker type. How can a woman learn more about how men operate when they are only willing to listen to other women who also have never learned how men think? This video is a truth bomb for women, which is why they won't take the message to heart. It's really sad. I have a female coworker who might benefit from watching this video, but I'll never send it to her because she may get offended.
Hmm I thought we aren’t supposed to ask a fish how to catch a fish. That’s what they say about women don’t ask a woman what she wants these random men on internet know better.
@michellesmith7363 Ahhh, but that's thinking like a woman. Asking a woman what she wants never works because women don't think about it. Rather, they FEEL something for a man and then act on it. On the other hand, men act based on logical thought, so if you ask a man what he really wants, he'll be more than happy to tell you what's on his mind provided that the woman makes it clear that nothing he says will offend. This is a fundamental difference in how men and women are wired.
One more thing.....if a man asks a woman what she wants, it's clear that he expects the woman to be "thinking" like he does, which shows his lack of understanding in regard to how women operate. 😆
@@christopherfernandez8153 you are correct that men and women are very different. I do tend to self reflect a lot and look at patterns in things but also I can change based on how I feel. A lot of what is said on these channels I don’t agree with though. Like saying for men to treat women poorly and they will want you or women want bad boys not nice guys I think the issue more is trying to lump women all into the same pot of preferences, a lot of these things indicate a woman has trauma like wanting someone that treats them bad.
I hardly ever like any videos, this one actually worth the like
That "I know you can do it" looked so snarky 😂
Orion is there to help, that's his business.
@@baffinsansterre I think you're missing the point
@@TJ_Travels1 It could be 50% of his market.
The major takeaway is that when men use game to get a woman, the women are not appreciative but when women use their ways to get a man we are grateful.
I think there are plenty of women out there that know how to get a man but wont "lower" themselves to accomplish it. When you are god's gift to men, there will never be a reason to learn. For women who actually want a man, they are getting bad advice around every corner...and here we are, prefering to die alone than ever having to please another person in any way.
"How come her heart's so stubborn / And what's so wrong with giving / Ask the big sky, talking about understanding women" -Elton John (imagine that)
Please note: women have been trying to learn men but let’s be fair both sides have been getting some very shitty advice and we’re just finally coming to terms, thankfully this channel and others are here to help 😊
I've always said young women (teenagers) should be busy with "Men's Studies" - in the sense of knowing how, what and why to pick early on, and to maximize their own value for most favorable picking.
Unlike men, we don't have the luxury to wait, to "sleep on it," to hedge our bets, develop "optionality," and such.
If there is a true natural female disadvantage/underprivilege, this is it.
What men don't get is that not all women in their prime (teen and early twenties) can achieve the potential of that prime without conscious intervention. They may be young and fertile, but that doesn't necessarily mean at the peak of their attractiveness. Men often conflate attractiveness with fertility, which doesn't mean they are attracted to homely young&fertile chicks.
Many women are late bloomers, look awkward at the theoretically "prime" age, still clueless about how to set off their best traits. Some are still battling baby fat, others just the modern fat, which they still don't know how to keep at bay, etc.
Later some lose the weight and the "pretty" finally comes through, but then they're also late 20's, if not 30's.
So the Situation must be tackled methodically, with science, dedicated studies and lots and lots of timely self awareness. Otherwise, settling or indefinite singlehood are guaranteed, along with eventual marital dissatisfaction.
This is because for women, the quality of the relationship and how actually satisfied they are with it is "make or break": the most important part of life. But nobody tells them that, on the contrary, there's a lot of denial.
Both schools of thought lie to women. The Progressive's holy grail is the Career, the Traditionals urge them on Family at any cost (regardless of optionality for partner selection).
It's neither. For women, marital/relationship satisfaction makes or breaks life. Everything else is secondary, and yes, that includes children and family.
We know optimal results need conscious efforts, its not rocket science. And we all know most young women dont know this because we see them go for all the wrong men. Bottom line is teach your kids to be capable of handling unconfortable truths and not seek conforting lies. Im sure men do it too but from my personal experience, every women are like that. On a couple occasions, I had girls being somewhat offended because when asked I told them they were 'cute'. ONLY CUTE ?!. My conforting lies wasnt even enough... because they were average, just like me 😅
A woman enters a man’s life…not the other way around, granted that man has put in the work ofcourse…but this is the ideal way.
"They may be young and fertile, but that doesn't necessarily mean at the peak of their attractiveness" YES, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT IT MEANS!!. I don't understand why women keep gasligthing themselves with that. Men's interest in women is MOSTLY due to sexual attraction, which is basically about percieved signs of youth and fertility. Females inmediately post-blooming have the strongest signs of, unsurprisingly what they are; young and fertile, and non-coincidentially, so are their eggs. So yes, a male is going to be interested in that age bracket due to biological reasons.
Once again; men are NOT complicated
@@j.davila4523 Yes and the woman must be very involved in studies about how to enter the right man's life. Otherwise, if they focus too much on setting up their own life, which is what they have been advised for decades now, they lose.
@@vipondiu
Yes, but that still doesn't explain why men are not exactly attracted to young, fertile and homely women, unless we talk about "any port in a storm" type situations. Those can easily get pregnant and give birth too - and yet many remain invisible to many men, let alone higher SMV men.
Young and fertile women can easily be unattractive due to a general lack of knowledge about how to present themselves in the world. This includes traits like weight or even the type of personality/vibes that attract guys.
FACT: aesthetics and fertile appearance are two distinct realities.
There are aesthetically gorgeous 40+ yo women and there are derriere-ugly teens and early 20's women too. Evidently, men who want to set up a family would obviously not be interested in the former category for that particular purpose (duh). However, virtually all would remain very much interested in a glorious encounter (or several).
I appreciate your straight no chaser content while reading the comments. I’m not single but I would like to implement some of your tips with my man. I can always improve and don’t feel like I know it all. Some of the truths are quite honest and that’s frankly what I need. Thank you to you and those that commented. :)
There is nothing funnier than female self help. Self Gaslighting is a better description. When I upped my game I watched all the Mens and Women's dating advice and 'going to the gym, maintain beautiful female friends and learn to be comfortable talking to pretty girls' beats all 'guys like confidence, get your PHD and set boundaries' BS from the other side.
As a woman I completely agree, I have been learning a lot recently about male psychology, and it has been eye opening. There is still a lot I don't understand though. For example; I ended a relationship last year with a guy who told me I wasn't meeting his needs in the relationship, but then he also told me he wanted to marry me???
You’re right, it takes sex, sandwiches, *and silence* 😂 5:48
Trouble is: it takes all those things CONTINUALLY through all the years of a marriage! Oh, and respect and honesty on top.
This advice it totally applicable to many women in long term relationships as well
My husband is the one who helped me to find out that I suffer from BPD and what you said in this video is so true. My husband invested so much time in me and I am forever grateful. We found a great Dr to work with me and I am a working progress! You are right so many women complain about their men but I am always the one asking them "what are you contributing in your relationship?" Thanks dr😊
This man is spitting
As an Iranian woman when I came to west I feel like a professor in men topic here😅in our culture we are full time studying eachother !
Welcome back Doc with the top nailing again 💪🏾
Most men learn about women too late, it's unfortunate.
Same the other way around. It's called "youth is wasted on the young."
well… as has been pointed out long ago, one (as self-respecting gent) may either understand xx.s (as for their, eg evo.psych, nature) OR love them. the cognitive dissonance implied in trying both is not bearable.
I like the channel and advice and Dr. Taraban is charming--I must admit that the idea of "the sexual marketplace" is a turnoff.
This is by far the most misogynistic video Orion has ever made. The nerve to ask something, anything from women is just so unfair. The level of effort suggested in this episode could kill many women who try, even in the slightest. You go queen!
I was outraged he pointed out women could be "responsible" to get what they wanted in dating. He really used the "r" word!
@@angeladangela500 -- Good men are tolerant and understanding upto a point beyond which they just walk away, leaving the bad behaving women behind.
I actually thought this was sarcasm
drizzle drizzle
@@G44052 keep thinking that lol
Bless you Orion. I probably have my Masters degree in women. Still working on my PHD after 2 marriages, divorce gra*e, and being alienated from one of my kids. I have 3 grandchildren I haven’t met. I’ve learned, among many other things, womyn and romantic relationships are NOT worth ANY effort. They have earned their loneliness and cats.
Can you elaborate more on how to do this?
I came here to learn how to get a man and listened to this whole video just for you to tell me why I should be doing what I’m here already doing and to get a book?
I agree with the content, but at the beginning he says it's a video for the ladies, but most of the first half he's talking to men.
Are you sure, you made me listen again? He’s talking about men, not talking to men. He’s explaining how men learn to attract women to explain how much effort is required to get what you want.
Perhaps just so the woman will listen. If he doesn't criticize men first in front of them, he'd be accused of misogyny.
Sure that was pretty straight up. And that is why I'm watching your video right now. And I have been doing things differently except I guess I need to go out into the public more often. Lol I think if I get involved in some activity or volunteering or a class or something I will meet more people. Pretty commonsensical.
Women don't necessarily want commitment! I learned it the hard way! And women don't want loyalty! I learned that the hard way too! I don't know if they don't want commitment form me! Or I don't know if they want loyalty from me! And don't know how to test that 😥.
Make yourself someone they’re scared to lose!
Oh, heck yeah they want commitment! Just because you offered it and she didn't want it doesn't mean they don't. They just may not want it from you bc you may the doung something wrong or fishing in the wrong pond.
In fact, the more eager a guy is to offer commitment, the less they want it...bc why would he be so willing and eager to commit? Think about it!
For your own sake, tame that down. And good luck!
Sounds like you're fishing in the wrong pond like previous poster said. Date the girls who like you the most and pick your favorite from that pool to commit to.
@@Cakez253 They deleted that post, meaning mine.
Hey, we need the same video for men. How to get any woman you want? It would be a great video everybody needs.
Hey Orion! I love your content, but I think you are making a basic mistake. You are talking to a woman as you would talk to a man. Most of my female friends that I have shared your videos get triggered in a bad way, then when I take time to explain what you said in a very very very subtle and soft way they agree anyways. You are barking to a cat. Love you and fantastic book, definitely on my top 5 ever.
The soft bigotry of walking on eggshells for their own good.
Good comment. But I think he may be trying to be blunt in order to break through some of the noise. But I agree, they have to watch a few episodes. I also highly recommend his book.
Great! New relationship conversation; “You know if you are looking for a long term relationship you are going to need to use some manipulation to get that. If you are not looking for that but some fun, then we can get started right now either way. I’m game, let’s go”.
"Leave your pride aside" ??????
I think most women will refuse the offer they rather be single
This episode has been good, old fashioned common sense...and its been enjoyable.
Most of social media has both sexes just complaining about the opposite sex. Here men have an advantage. There are more places for men talking about solutions.
The honest long term solution is to wait and stop having anxiety about women
@@Savvynomad225 I strongly disagree. Waiting is way too passive. I have been putting in the work for the past 8 years on myself and on women, and I have been seeing abolutely AMAZING results. 10 years ago, I was depressed and couldn't get any woman, literally. Now, I am being called a hunk by multiple attractive women and I am having more sex than ever before! Orion's message is true: if you put in the work, results will follow automatically.
Go to Asia or any other poor country. There all Women sing sweet songs to you
Very good observations and points. Very true! I dont know how the women watching will respond but i love your delivery
Idk man…. I’m pretty sure a lot of men want commitment and loyalty and want to be it too.
In the part 2 >>> how is it they are like this on the first date? Women of all people should understand that we don’t even know them yet.
Bro I’m 28. Never in my life did I want to sleep with just one woman. Actually at age 16 my dream was to make it to the nfl so sleeping with multiple woman would be easier. But never in my life did I have a goal of having a 1 body count.
@@doyoueatrocks You want commitment and loyalty from hot h0es only, that's why you're not getting it, because you're looking for it from the wrong type of women.
@@pj_saiti7808 Poor you. Your comment is one of the most insecure and miserable things I've read in a long time. Must be horrible hating yourself that much to let yourself reach that low.
1000% on point, as usual. But because he’s using LOGIC it’ll be in one ear and out the other 😂 God bless our women
Its not that women don't know about men, it's that they don't care what men want or what we think. They feel like they shouldn't have to do anything and they should just get what they want.
All of society holds that men SHOULD give women what they want, or else they're bad people... while concurrently, women owe men nothing. IOW, Society hates you.
And why would they not? They do get away with it, don´t they?
Until they don´t. Then it´s the crying game about how they are not seen as they are over 40 years old and how superficial everyone is.
Doc killing it again.
If this was an ad to get me to buy your book, it worked
Thanks Dr. Taraban, your videos have really helped me to realize my own worth in relationships as well as some great perspectives on dating in the modern world. Thanks for what you do and sharing this information in easy to digest nuggets.
Book recs for women on men?
"The value of others" by Dr Orion Taraban.
The reason I have been following Orion is exactly because I've been studying men. Reading the comments sections is helpful in getting an understanding of men as well. Although the men from here mostly represent men that are starting to or have lost their enthusiasm in finding a long term committed partnership.
Man you were doing so great until the very end where you say “put your pride to the side” … we all know women can’t do that. And that is the reason they will not put in the effort.
It's crazy how many comments are from people saying there should have been more advice for women on how to understand men. My dudes and dudettes, the advice "learn what men want" is about putting in some actual effort. That's it! A little while back a girl was beaming interest and positive vibes at me, I almost melted. That slightest touch of effort was super effective!
After watching this channel for over 1 year,, I have came to a conclusion to stay single, enjoy my sports,, stay healthy and avoid the drama of females,, plus I have saved a shit load of money,
Aaaaannnd get yourself a boyfriend 😉
I used to have a gay boss who, to establish a rapport with me, would often point out women whom he found to be attractive. Invariably they were tall, broad shouldered, athletic, had a nice car, a nice house in a nice neighborhood, were highly educated, rich, and were from an important family. My grade for his insights into what straight men find attractive? F
Thats hilarious and fascinating at the same time!
Wow, for the majority of guys, that's wayyyy off.. Most men aren't after a single one of those things. Not one of those is on my list. Closest one is athletic, but even then, I'm not looking for athletic necessarily, just a healthy looking figure. I'm after pleasant females, kind, nurturing. I could care less what kind of car she drives, and broad shoulders would scare me.
Great video Orion, keep up the good work!
Why don't people study how to be a better human for the sake of themselves and in order to have a deeper connection with others? Why is this such a shallow and manipulative game? This paradigm is a spiritually vapid and an existential dead end. Super bleak.
There is no more prominent theme in Orion's entire oeuvre than this: committed relationships are transactions where people try to extract the most while giving the least possible.
The whole Sting ethos of "if you love someone, set them free" - yeah, that's love. That's about giving - and giving without resentm...oops, I mean expectations. People who seek committed relationships are not seeking to love, they are seeking to GET. Period.
@@chipsteveI think we ALL fantasize about a relationship that’s just two people giving everything to each other without expecting anything in return. Unconditional love and devotion sounds amazing.
But as I approach 50 years old, my experience is that while a relationship may start out feeling that way, _eventually_ people start to have expectations of their partners.
If those needs or expectations go unmet (for either party) for too long, the relationship will inevitably end.
My take isn’t that Orion reduces all relationships to transactional affairs. Rather, he acknowledges the hard truth none of us really like to admit: Relationships take work, and if we can apply our efforts in the right direction and on the right things, those efforts will pay huge dividends in the form of security, happiness, and a lasting affection.
If I know that my partner feels really special and loved if I bring her some flowers, and she’ll be happy the rest of the day, why not just do that for her? First because I love her, but second, because it also makes MY life better.
I can choose to resent her for “needing” something, or I can be thrilled that I know what she needs and that I’m able to provide it.
Yeah yeah. The spiritual talk as if our bodies don't have necessities. The problem with spiritual talk is that the reward is in he other side, after you're dead. Can you imagine? Good luck with that
@@chipsteveLove has been used as a fulcrum for thousands of years to leverage strawman conclusions laced with ad hominem. The tradition continues.
You are attempting to refute Orion’s book in a single paragraph. Rather, I encourage the intellectually more rigorous effort of engaging his complex chapter on Love and refuting his points individually, if you can, rather than using the ‘Love’ label as a plastic gunrest for sniping at his oeuvre. Not many here will appreciate cheap pop-shots at the author.
@@WildMidwest1 Huh? I think Orion actually AGREES with what I wrote above.
The thing with this is that it goes against society’s messaging of women being perfect just because they’re women and any man no matter how successful or top tier he is should be lucky to get any woman no matter how low and unattractive she is. For example this goes against the body positivity movement because a man should accept a woman and be attracted to her no matter how overweight she is.
Was looking forward to see how I could improve 😭 all I got was ‘get a coach’
Currently reading his book
Yeah I noticed that too. I think the point was to study men as hard as men study women and figure out what men actually want, not what you think they want or should want . I always sort of joked with myself that I've probably got a masters in psychology from trying to be attractive to women. Probably not too far from the truth that I do have a masters worth of knowledge at this point.
Know thyself, then know the kind of man that would suit you/make you happy, then find out what that type of man likes to see from a woman.
What women need to do is simple:
1) Find a man who is worth submitting to. (he should have the qualities: strength and competence)
2) Submit to him. (let him be the leader)
imagine needing a book to navigate life hahahaha
@@attroenergizer8115 Good one.
Raw unadulterated truths from Orion.
"What is the alternative to manipulating women?" Building and sustaining a genuine, organic connection based on honesty and clear intentions.
Real world experience teaches you it's not like this. I thought as you did at one time but it doesn't work in the western world.
@@chimera2116 False. The West has fallen precisely because gender dynamics have disintegrated into carnal, hedonistic games for sex and money; there is no ancestral nor communal accountability towards mate selection. The only way to change the system is to live by example. Succumbing to others' mediocrity will get you nowhere.
@@achann825 no point "living by example" in the manner you described, when today's women are actually bad people. Genuineness is wasted on them.
"Building and sustaining a genuine, organic connection based on honesty and clear intentions"
this will get you precisely nowhere
Thabk you doctor!
*Starts taking notes*
So obvious yet it needs to be clearly stated in today's society.
Great video, sir.
As a man who wants what women say they want, commitment and loyalty, I call bullshit on that one.
I read the Rational Male and have had no problem since.
Not one single female on this planet will take this advice. Not a one.
😆😅🤣stop it.
they only learn the hard way
Oh, believe me - there would be lots of gnashing of male teeth if women actually did take the time for a PhD in Men to figure out how to get the men who really suit them and those they really want - or nothing. Your mistake is to believe that if women studied hard on this topic, they would become enlightened enough to want guys like you instead of Glorious Chads. They wouldn't. They might become more self-aware earlier about their own needs and more selective in terms of which type of guy could meet those needs long term - but all in all, they would certainly not change preferences from Glorious Chad to 50/50 Beta Bob just bc they graduated with a PhD on Men.
@@raggydoll0189 or not at all
Wrong. There are a select few women who already do this and that’s why they’re winning and the rest are all losing. And that’s why they have the negative outlook and attitude Orion speaks of in this video. They’re losing and are bitter about it but don’t want to change anything about themselves. They make it a breeze for the rest of us.
Waiting for a Meetcute!!! Love it....💔
The entire relationship section in the book store is geared for women. What are you talking about? Every woman I know has a library of relationship books, podcasts, coaches, etc. I don’t know any men reading relationship books, etc
Most of them are crap though. Alison Armstrong is easily the best at bridging the differences in our communication styles
@@Ozzy-Mag I’ll give you that. Half the problem is men give advice they would like to be accurate but women give advice they actually experience working. For example- male coaches all suggest sex for everything and the female experience is the opposite. Husbands all over the world are cheating on their grade A wives for fat sloppy prostitutes just bc they crave “strange” or new and it’s not a lack of being fit and easygoing.
I am watching so that I can learn something about men. Also, I am try to listen to what men I know have to say about their relationship habits without judgement so that I can try to win over one particular man. Hopefully, it's working.
I wish this video had actually taught me something practical / applicable. My problem has been that there's a lot of material out there - but most of it sucks or just isn't accurate.