Women do the right things with the wrong men: the good times-to-hassle ratio
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- Опубліковано 28 чер 2024
- Women often complain that the men they're not really interested in always seem to come back, while the men they'd really like to have relationships with never seem to reciprocate their feelings. This is because women do the right things with the wrong men. In this episode, I'll discuss how this influences the good times-to-hassle ratio that is instrumentally related to which women men decide to pursue.
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #dating #women
Women often complain that the men they're not really interested in always seem to come back, while the men they'd really like to have relationships with never seem to reciprocate their feelings. This is because women do the right things with the wrong men. In this episode, I'll discuss how this influences the good times-to-hassle ratio that is instrumentally related to which women men decide to pursue.
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oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #dating #women
Fantastic video, Dr.! Thank you! :)
''women, if you like a guy, do not put obstacles in the path of eating at your restaurant. make the guys you don't really like wait and allow the men you WANT to keep around to cut to the front of the line.''
This would be great advice if majority of women didn't WANT men they often can't get to commit. what they like and want are often men who tend to have high optionality and if we know anything about human nature, decision paralysis, explorer syndrome, and even arrogance comes with that territory. The saying ''all men are dogs'' is popular with many women for this very reason. The men that they like and want, get to hit easily but bail afterwards.
The above advice will serve women well only if they rationally reevaluate their taste in men, and then adopt a better criterion for mate selection.
I may have been passed up as a partner but I still have a role in their lives.
It is still MY fault.
😂
I and watch you a lot and I think the point is valid but mistaken. Women should not do this with the guy they like - they should do it with the good guy! The problem is women will sleep quickly with the Chad or the hot guy and the good guy is the guy she strings along so it’s not women should do it with the guys she likes- that’s incorrect she should do these things with the good guy or the guy who likes her.
If women did this with the guys she likes then the same set of guys would keep getting sex.
It’s not good guy who likes her and wants a relationship that she sleeps with but the bad boy who she likes and that’s where the issue is - women sleep with the guys they like who do not like them back and then she cannot secure a relationship from that guy.
I think if the video is good but missing the problem. Women already sleep with the men they like and make it easy for those guys. Those men just don’t like that particular woman back.
Women do sexually reward men they find naturally attractive. The problem is women don’t necessarily tend to land these guys because of their vast options, and the men they usually end up settling with they aren’t very sexually enthusiastic about. So they try to prolong the process as much as possible in order to gain as much from the situation as possible. That’s why often times you see husbands say after marriage, their wives completely shut them off. The classic bait and switch.
Vast options doesn't imply the best options. If a woman has too many partners there always going to men in there who wasn't upto her level socio-economically or treated her right. And nobody likes to mistreated by anyone. As for the husband getting the classic bait & switch, he was just the provider she had settled for because the losers she wasted her time on didn't work out at all.
Classic move
To be honest, it's all a bit of a false dichotomy really.
The women who do land their "high value" target eventually get unenthusiastic about him also. It's only a matter of time. Women are constantly in a cycle of becoming unhappy about something.
As men we need to stop taking any of it particularly seriously. Starting with them.
@@rajakghosh6602It might not be totally clear from the wording, but it seems to me that the "vast options" refers to the small % of men that happen to attract many women, not to the women that have many partners. So women reward those men by making it easy to be with them, but those men won't stick to any one woman because they have so many options they would rather just play around.
Marital friendzone
the truth is in the insidious use of language:
1. "I don't really like this guy" = I am sexually attracted to this guy, but I don't see a long-term potential with him (he may or may not like me back) => act fast
2. "I really like this guy" = I may or may not be sexually attracted to him but I see a long-term potential with him => drag things out, try to trap him
actions are louder than words
Tru…..Women R Biologically Programmed 2 Lie.
I also found this video to be too non specific enough to understand.
You got it right, the doctor missed this one. The guy she's sexually attracted to almost always cuts the line, it's the guy she isn't all that attracted to but has 'bf' potential qualities, she purposely makes wait in line.
@@mctreasure Yeah, I think that's the first time the doc missed
By confusing attracted to long-term potential as attracted sexually
This comment right here. 💯
Just *flip* the perspective.
If a man took most girls he dates to Nobu restaurant but took you, who he REALLY liked to a coffee date, how would you feel knowing he's treating girls he liked less better?
Most women would have an issue with this.
This is why you should adapt to be a man that's quick to leave them so they go into FOMO mode.
Another one. My previous relationships got engagements rings (with huge rocks) within 6 months of us meeting. I really like you so I am going to make you wait at least 3 years for your tiny rock. I want to make sure you are really committed to me and not some rock. Hello!?? Where did you go? crickets...
That's exactly what they are doing. The very reason why the birds are clucking a n d.....NONSTOP on family and friends. He treated her like a lady and so now she believes that's her qualifications. One man with two different approaches and because he wants a guarantee on his investment...we KNOW who gon give it up fast. But it's to whoever spending. That's what men don't know. That sneaking n freaking goes both ways.
@whocarescrapsa Bro, you would be crucified in CoPO, lol. X, Reddit, Tik Tok; you name it, you'd be called every name in the book.
But, as an antagonist, I'd throw on, "and since I want to really make sure we last, we'll be discussing a prenup soon after you receive the ring."
I just couldn't help myself, aha.
So if a girl rejects coffee date for that exact reason, is it really a red flag?
@@BurnsIsTheMainCharacter it is good in the sense that she is not wasting the guys time or money. The fact that coffee was enough to put her off simply shows her interest level is extremely low. Men need to find a gal that has genuine burning desire for him and ONLY entertain those women. This comes with experience. If he said he was picking up dog crap in the park and asked her to join him, the interested ones won’t care what they do and will want to be around him. It’s far better to say no than stand a guy up or make him jump through silly hoops because you are not really interested.
"Men do not feel liked when interactions with you are difficult, effortful, serious, expensive, inconvenient, and sexually frustrating. Are you listening?"
I'm not sure this rhetorical question will land for women, because to them what men don't like isn't their concern.
Well said.
I love men, still disagree. Read my comment above🙊💅
It won't get through their narcissim
@@ninc2518 You don't understand that youtube shows your comment above for you, but most probably it is way below for the rest of the people.
He's really saying about the men they like 'don't be a difficult bitch', because men who have themselves together won't tolerate that childish garbage.
This is completely logical.... so no woman who doesn't already understand is going to listen.
Read my comment 🙊💅
A quick lesson on the use of the ellipsis: "This is completely logical...so no woman...is going to listen."
I understood it. And I didn’t understand it before.
@@lauratabachik6965Did you "understand" it the same way women understand "equality"... ?
@@lauratabachik6965
Your the 1% exception to prove the rule
"Orion you don't get it, my feelings are valid. I know it's real"
Right! 😂 I can hear them saying, "he just doesn't understand women!"
@@duaneh1973 no jokes 😂. My brother found a girl at work, he made a bit of flirting with her. She started to want him. My brother said he wants nothing to do with her, to me and to her he said it to everyone. She left her boyfriend of 9 years, she made a circus at work and start texting me saying how she felt that it was real. I told her is not because my brother said he doesn't want you not even for sex. She said I don't get it because she knows it's real.
@@danieldoca7158 I know! A woman will leave or destroy a committed relationship based off of feelings. I'm a living example. My ex-wife felt I was the problem in our relationship. I worked 2 jobs, paid all the bills except her car note, because she worked. That wasn't enough. No matter what you do you can't make them happy.
Your feelings may be "valid," but that doesn't mean they accurately reflect reality. 😂
Feelings are always valid.
BUT, the thoughts and beliefs that CAUSE those feelings are often illogical
So be the wrong man
No, don't be the wrong man because of women. Women are not god.
Exactly 💯
That's basically it. Your options are: be the *worst* douchetool you possibly can, and enjoy the superficial engagement/hookups... or self-improve to the umpteenth degree and settle for an LTR with a woman whose SMV is *so* far below yours its genuinely laughable.
My 20’s in a nut shell.
The reward-to-investment is optimal. That's been my experience as well.
Don't save damaged women. It's not the men's job to become their therapist.
You can't anyways, and therapy is a scam by & large.
(Talking about yourself always feels good. Doesn't make it productive.)
I have a thing for damaged women tho. 😭😭
Crazy attracts crazy lol
Why didn’t you tell me that 40 years ago when I met a damaged woman and got married? Thanks for nothing 😂
@@youlooklikeagoodjoeyoulooklone I do also. Now I also tire of them faster. After all there are many damaged fish in the sea!
YEP. When woman make it easy for me, I feel invited and accepted. When they make it difficult, I feel pushed away and don’t want to put in effort. That simple.
Same
Don't you also think she was easy with other guys. What red pill men would call "Pump & Dump" material?
Everyone wanna feel like they were the exception. It's role playing. Professional violators always pull down the monkey mask when it's a new fish.
@@HappyJiyoung This shouldn't matter. What a woman does with other men isn't our concern (under normal, sane circumstances)
What matters as men: are we getting what we want? Yes-- GOOD! No-- then it's time to make a change.
@@weirdcoincollection Man with optionality will enjoy what he wants-like Dubai expat men. They get what they want easily it seemed.
No reason to keep seeing one woman when they have so many options paid or non paid(escort heaven-Dubai).
So for normal women, this strategy(giving what men want) won’t be good for them.
She would be discarded after sex as these men don’t need to commit ot keep seeing her when there are variety of buffet.
Great point. Over the last 20 years, A number of women have given me great sex, but when I developed feelings for them, they dumped me. I remember thinking “I guess I’ll just tell a girl I love her when I want her to dump me so I can date someone else, and she’ll be the one who feels guilty.” Most of these women are in worse situations now 10 years later, married to losers, divorced, single moms or lesbians.
Just tell them all tae feck off. That way you'll become interesting to them without giving a shite.
I've often found that when I couldn't give a crap about what a woman thinks and just say my piece they get aroused, either positively or negatively.
The average woman is on a different level when it comes to gameplaying but when you really don't give a crap and call them out on their BS you'd be amazed at how much attention you get from them. However, I'm in my late 40s and just couldn't be arsed with them and their emotional moods.
It's likely you've noticed that more marriages end in failure than in success. Whether or not you've researched this, the statistics show that most marriages ultimately end in divorce. To simply blame women for this trend seems OVERLY SIMPLISTIC. A relationship involves two individuals and myriad factors contribute to its longevity and health over 30, 40, or even 50 years.
People have diverse aesthetic and cultural preferences, among other factors. It's challenging, if not nearly impossible, to feign interest. This applies to both men and women, as men often find themselves in similar predicaments. Dismissing those who genuinely value them and pursuing those who show little regard is unfortunately common, as evidenced by your own experiences.
Labeling someone as a "loser" requires subjective definition, applicable to both genders. What constitutes a "loser" for me may not align with your perspective. Interestingly, many men equate success in a woman with empowerment. Recognizing this, it becomes evident that generalizations are fraught with complexities, though I acknowledge the gist of your argument rsrsrsrsrs
@@meliciaoliveira9895😂😂😂 AI much?
@@meliciaoliveira9895women file for divorce 75-80% of the times
@@meliciaoliveira9895what he meant was those women ended up with someone just because they have no another choice but when you read his comment you got trigged and wrote an essay.
This is 100% true. All of the women I had a long term relationship with didn't play the hard to get game.
Adding to the restaurant analogy, men with options also have other restaurants that would love to see them.
The food may not be as good, or he's tired of the menu, but the obstacles are low. Hell, sometimes the food even comes to you!
Ladies need to realize that to high-value men, you are not the only restaurant in town, no matter how good your food is. The ok pizza down the street that's delivered is the better option some days.
Will the man then commit to the ok pizza restaurant rather than the high class restaurant? The answer is no because ok pizza place is accessible for everyone but high class restaurant is only accessible for select few.
@@maamuushthat's only relevant if the culture and social environment is structured to protect women from themselves and keep them in check. Any woman no matter how good or high class has the tools to destroy your life on a whim. You need not be found guilty of anything either because accusations alone are more than enough to ruin your career and life. In today's modern world women are not deserving of commitment because they refuse to hold each other accountable
I had a beautiful girl, raised right, I know her very strict parents. Her notch count was probably 0 but she made me wait for dates and I was like, fcuk, I dont want it, I can get like 5 girls in the same time it will take me to get a date with you
@@maamuush You’re getting commitment and sex mixed up. Yes, high-value men will not commit to the pizza girl, but we’ll sleep with her till we find a woman worth committing to.
@@BadThrusheru did her her a favor and she is better of!! U clearly werent the guy for her!!! Go have your multiple dates with many women!! She was trying to build something substantial before giving it up!! I thought that is what u all wanted? But u would rather 5 random women who wouldnt think twice about giving it up after one date!!! U all make hos and then complain!! The women are damned if they do and damned if they dont!! Get a life!!! This thinking is destructive to society!!!
Women, understand it from this perspective. It's like me taking a woman I like to the worst date possible to a one-star date with roaches to see if she actually likes me and taking the woman I don't like to a five-star restaurant with the best service.
they don't care
Some people will say, men don't mind waiting if the woman in question had the same standards with them as she did with other men.
Issue with this reasoning is: how do you know if a woman had the same standards with other men before you? Unless you know this woman for years, you will have to rely on her telling you, her truth. in other words, you will never know. No women with some experience will tell a man they want to settle with that they had 30 one-night stands before him.
That's the same problem as the body count.
Men must be patient. If he slows down and turns his big brain on, he will know.
Exactly. So that's why he fo his hoefax...AFTER he was added to the list. That's ass backwards. Whatever she had...is now his problem. He just see a pretty face and a bbl.
The simple solution is to get a virgin. If she is not intact, just enjoy the ride.
This is why promiscuity poisons the well. Most men who aren't brainwashed by modern culture have to assume the worst.
Moral of the story: do not play hard-to-get games. Be available and prioritize the men you like the most. Be easygoing
Orion the god of analogies 🔥
He's got it wrong again!
@jon3326 what generation were you born in and how many western women have you and circle of friends dated in the last 5 years? You don't have to answer that, I already know
However, I don’t understand some of these women and men. How could you have sex with someone you don’t even really like. I am so glad that I was raised different, and I was taught to say no to things I don’t like.
If a rich man you weren't attracted to offered you anything you desire, you'd quickly change your tone
For most men and some women, the scale for sexual quality covers ok to great, whereas most women and a few men also recognise bad sex. The gender difference is due to the "cost of pregnancy" with a pinch of biological variability.
You can do it because you really don't like sex that much. I want to marry a woman who wants sex every single day twice a day and can't stand to go without.
@@torachan23 what? How is a rich man giving away his money the same as a woman giving away her body possible pregnancy, std and a altered life for sex? All the rich man lost was money. Are you referring to a woman Will sleep with a rich man? Again...my life could be on the line along with morals and standards.. but I a christian. What do I know? Just an observer watching all of you not see the chaos you are creating.
Because you come from an Conservative Asian household where the fathers are patriarch of the family and women are in their feminine role. Positive male role models are extremely important in childs formative years.
The problem is, if she does the "correct thing" with the "man she likes" then when the "man she likes" starts to reach out to her and invest in her to get her to come back, she will start to lose interest because now he is doing the "incorrect thing" with the "girl he likes". If they both do the "correct thing" with the "person they like" they will both be avoiding contact with each other. See how stupid that is?
I’m just upfront with men & avoid men who don’t do the same. Works for me.
Just stop with the complex mind-games and be upfront. Its 100% the best long-term strategy, games never work!
Lol! Conclusion.
The man should do the wrong thing with the right girl and the girl should do the right thing with the wrong guy! Wow! So logical!
100%. Im tired of not being rewarded for my time and effort while the others got it up front. It's even worse when they say or elude to their past, but claim either you or them are different now.Turns me off from being interested in pursuing anything further with them.
Women DO let the men they like cut the line and DO put the men in queue who they like less. They put the men they like on a short-term basis in front of the line and the men they like on long term basis have to stay in line
Yeah I think for guys it's best to be seen as hookup material and then if you end up liking her you can convince her that you're also long-term material.
That's way better than her seeing you as long-term material right out of the gate.
Women make themselves the side-chick
@@bandit7497 Isn't that kind of strange?
This comment is actually better than the video. If she is making you wait, she isn't physically interested. If she is making you wait, she is just financially interested and trying to determine if he will financially invest in her and how much money she can get out of the relationship.
..and then the girls complain "where have all the good men gone!?"
(A. your friendzone)
(AA. women are contrary)
(AAA. see divorce lawyer before getting married)
First time I'm disagreeing with Orion. Women make it very easy for men they have intense, genuine desire for. Women put up obstacles for men they "like" (aka are actually not their first choice).
If she’s sexually attracted to you, then she’ll make it easy for you
But if she likes you for any other reason than raw genuine sexual desire.. then she’ll keep on back burner
You are both right. Because playing hard to get is a strategy to artificiality inflate female value/attractiveness. It does not mean every woman will decide to use it. I personally hate it, it is always game over for me, what you are saying is one of the reasons for my disgusts - it is always safer (particularly in MeToo era) and less egoistical to presume that woman who ignores you is simply not interested. Them pulling hard to get card is actually extremely irresponsible both towards men and towards other women who have been troubled by stalkers.
Men don't mind waiting if the woman in question had the same standards with him as she did with other men. But if she in the past didn't put up many obstacles for other men and just initiated an intimate relationship with little hassle then other men are not going to like that they're the ones that have to jump over twenty obstacles to get what others got with just five because it shows that either she isn't consistent with her standards or that it's clear she isn't as interested in him as she was with the ones she made things easy with.
Couldn’t have said it any better. Yes sir. It’s so confusing and convoluted and yet somehow in their minds it makes all the sense in the world. It’s truly just terrible business conduct/practice
Issue with your reasoning is: how do you know if a woman had the same standards with other men before you? Unless you know this woman for years, you will have to rely on her telling you, her truth. in other words, you will never know. No women with some experience will tell a man they want to settle with that they had 80 one-night stands before him.
This is so true. I remember going out with a girl who told me that she used to have a low threshold for being physical with a guy, "but now I'm more looking for a serious commitment". I couldn't have been more turned off if she had grabbed a turd from the ground and ate it. Are you expecting me to pay top dollar for a popsicle that was passed around the playground for all the other kids to lick for free? Either I'm in the playground too and get to lick the same popsicle for free like the other kids, or I go to a specialist confectionery to buy a high value treat that is just for me.
And before someone says these are double standards: yes they are. I spent most of my younger years not having sex with girls because I didn't want to lower my value for that special girl that was just for me - until I learned that girls were actually grossed out by that and had almost a requirement for a guy that he was sexually experienced. I don't make the rules here, I just adapt as they are presented to me.
Or she slept with a guy who made it seem as though he liked and intended for a relationship and it turned out not to be the case so she learned a lesson and changed her standards.
@@chrishnahProblem is still the same. Someone else bought the car for a cheaper price; the car is now used and I for one won’t pay a higher price for it.
The title of this video reminds of that scene from "A Bronx Tale" where Robert De Niro tells his son "yeah you did a good thing for a bad man"
That's my favorite movie! So many life lessons, especially for dating.
@@Thomas-qi9ix The Door Test. That's what counts!
This has worked well for me, as a woman who generally behaves very consistently with men regardless of how much I like them.
What I have learn so far: people really hate free lodging in every sense.
hahaha
Leaving comment to get notify on this.
Yes, indeed. Their judgement is often based upon feelings, which are extremely hormonal. Free will works for all humans, in theory, but in practice, we can see what happens.
I understand and mostly agree, the only ish I have is that women biochemically bond to men when we have sex with them. Men don’t bond this way (right away). It truly is a potentially more emotionally taxing thing for a woman to sleep with a man too soon before some sort of mutually beneficial agreement is in place. I understand life comes with inherent risks but I’m not gonna intentionally bring a bunch of heartache onto myself
Are you certain about this? Biochemical bonding? The way I see it: Sex can be an act of pleasure or an act of love, depending on after how long it occurs. An act of pleasure happens immediately, so attachment may not be there. But an act of love can cause a bond to be deeper
@@jay4239yes, it's scientifically proven that women bond straight awayr...so having sex bear a lot of conséquences for women, many more risks thanfor men. They should not sleep lightly though : pregnancy risks, risks of being assaulted/raped by her partner, emotional bonding risks etc
@carynefuture5778 then why do alot of modern women sleep with guys so fast?
Ah, but this is precisely why the phenomenon he describes in the video is so frustrating for guys: if a girl sleeps with a lot of guys very soon because she "isn't interested in a relationship with them" but has you jumping through hoops without allowing this bonding to occur because she "now wants to go slow because she is ready for a relationship" - it feels to us like the opposite; she was ready to pair bond with a bunch of guys before me for very little investment on his part but she does not allow the same with me. Doesn't feel right.
Note that women who simply have high standards for all their encounters and do not have sex with any men until they both are sure they want to explore a serious relationship - are not mentioned in this video at all. It is those who have low standards for one-night-stands and high standards for long term relationships that are mentioned.
"It truly is a potentially more emotionally taxing thing for a woman to sleep with a man too soon"
Yet very many women do exactly that with men who won't be in a realationship with them, because they believe they can land a man who is out of their league that way or that they have a form of power because they are "using the man for what they need him for"
Exactly right. You can't tell if a woman loves you or hates you. She behaves the same either way.
Orbiters are handy.
That's very draining 😅
Just assume that she does have fun and move on with your life
When I met my GF her Best Friend (female) strongly suggested to make me wait. She didn't list to her and said that she would not play games, because it feels wrong. I was so proud of her when I heard this. We would not be together if she did try to make me wait.
Women who do this shit disqualify themselves in such a way and have no one to blame but themselves, they deserver to be with whom they end up with.
This dynamic is exactly why Ive been single for 95% of my life. "I really like you, so Im gonna make you responsible for all my negative emotions and insecurities."
However, Ive chosen poorly most of the time, and not recognized the couple of good ones I had. Im at fault too.
If she doesnt have the sense to not be a gigantic hassle in the beginning, shes going to grow into a gargantuan hassle in 3 months. Its always the 3 month mark where the facade slides off. Like the end of an episode of Scooby Doo.
you must have been the only one to confess that you made bad choices in life, (like women and any other person who has already matured) In fact, men and women make bad choices. HAHAHAHA, YES. I agree.
i relate to this so much
where i went wrong is when i stuck around to long instead of dropping the gargantuan hassle. It never gets better and you feel more trapped.
"3 month mark" you hit the nail on the head with that.
The art of being a marriage-material woman is to provide the man with said positive fun-to-hassle-ratio, without having to immediately resort to sex to provide fun. Giving away your body shouldn't be your only option to make time with you desirable. Femininity, beauty and inspirational support have a massive impact on a man's emotional state around you.
This is becoming a lost art in society but I 100% agree.
I am 44 and thought i knew a lot about psychology and human nature, yet every time I watch one of these videos i learn something. I recently single (5 months ago) i have been applying these principles and my god… so so effective
The women with whom I have had long-term relationships were the ones that made it the easiest on me. But, inevitably, those relationships ended because it became not so easy to be with them.
I know it's not the doctor's intent with his videos but each one just further cements my decision to just give up on women and relationships.
Can you further elaborate on why it wasnt easier to be with them?
@@jay4239 They got bored and drifted away. I was no longer a priority to them.
@@jay4239Because women are taught today the opposite to how to keep a man. Innately it's too hard for them, they need a strong role example for that.
Beauty can get them to the doors of the relationship. But it doesn't mean it'll keep them in the house for long enough.
I don't know if you're saying something in this vein, but it happened to me that they gave up the coochie super fast and then they started withholding to try and manipulate me
@@JaySmith-pv2mw that is because you changed your behaviour while being in a relationship.
If in the initial stage they are really into you and they chase you, once they see you do the same with them, that is a turn off. It happened to me too.
Also, its crucial to make her feel something. It can be either hate or love, but not being bored. This is even more prevalent nowadays, because people got used to situationships and emotional fluctuations and spikes. Therefore being stable is classified as boring.
I bet his advice will fall on deaf ears.
Haha so true
Had a girl I went out with a few times with tell me on the first date that she had been hooking up after she broke up with her ex bf. The first date went well but on the subsequent dates she told me how she wanted to wait and that she had been celibate for the past year etc etc. She justified it by saying that she was taking me seriously and that's why she wanted to wait. I don't really even believe what women say anymore but the fact that she was putting this barrier between us was a major turn off. She was saying how guys just F her and leave her and here is my dumb a@& entertaining her lol. She actually had a good personality and I would've hit her up again but she kinda didn't let it happen. Maybe I should stop telling women my profession and other things and just lie and say I'm a bum with no car or credit 😂 thats gotta be it
Any girl who keeps on having casual ONS it's a pretty big red flag.
Then you won’t get any woman at all if you say that lol
Sorry to say but she did not feel zexually attracted to you but she wants to keep you around as a backup in her orbit and hence she is giving you BS that she wants to wait for you.
@@heyyashleyyy2669 Sprinkle-Sprinkle, amirite?
@@rayrwyr yeah I figured... Funny thing is she tried to lie telling me that she finds me attractive/handsome but yada yada. Onto the next
Good guy: She receives more than she gives.
Bad Boy: She gives more than she receives.
Be a bad boy
Stay toxic
@@janushomer9111 Problem is, you can't fake being a "Bad Boy", You either got it in you, or you don't. You're better off just adding some of their successful traits to your repertoire.
@@TrillBill I never said : "fake being a bad boy"
@@janushomer9111 "Be a Bad boy" implies becoming something you're not. A Deer simply can't "be" a Tiger
A friend of mine that I had a casual hookup relationship with back in grad school, was surprised that her current boyfriend was pissed when she told him that she used to hookup with the guy that she used to study all night with ( me), before they met. She was like " why should he feel raw about the fact that she used to sleep with someone before she met him?".
I asked her how long they were together before they slept with each other, she said around 6 months. And she went on to give the same female logic of " we didn't mean anything to each other, just 2 bored students trying to unwind after hours of studying", but with him, it's special and she wanted to make sure he was invested in her before she allowed him access to her physically.
In her head, she thinks that he's getting her best and I only got "scraps", as she said "with him, she makes love, with me, it was just sex",
I had to explain to her exactly what the Dr said in this video, ie he feels like he's getting the short end of the stick because unlike him, I didn't have to take her on a single date, buy her flowers or anything other than a pizza here and there that we often split. We didn't have to go anywhere other than the library and back to my apartment or her dorm room and yet I got to explore her body countless times while he had to wait 6 months.
I get it. But again, you didn't marry her. Precisely because she did not Make you wait nor invest anything. Do, contrary to What Doc Orion says, the Woman doesn't win anything when she sleeps easily, when the man doesn't wait. We Want true relationships and marriage and children, so they need to make men wait !
@@carynefuture5778 1. I didn’t marry her because I never dated her. We were friends with benefits. I never saw her as a romantic partner. No amount of withholding sex would’ve changed my mind or the way I say her. Unlike most women, love and sex/lust are 2 different things and very often don’t mix ( they do sometimes but often times, they tend to be experienced differently).
2. The idea of trying to bait a man into a relationship is the reason why there are so many miserable partnerships today, because when the man eventually gets you in bed and the lust wears out, your flaws that we’re suppressed by his desire for your body would become heightened and he would treat you accordingly.
Although I understand your perspective, as a woman your feelings get involved and you get attached, and to be fair to you, an easy lay can be a red flag 🚩 for many men that have intentions to commit.
@@carynefuture5778😂. You're for real doing mental gymnastics about this? Doubling down like this?
@@carynefuture5778only works if you're virgin. Then you can make me wait
@@carynefuture5778 you can throw as much of your woman logic you want. Men dont like this shit. This is hardwired evolution. If you somehow managed to make him a husband "by making him wait"...the moment he finds out, he's cheating on you...with multiple women. I dont make the rules
However what Orion fails to mention in this video, is that women make the betas wait because there is no organic desire there.
The girl in his example, says that "she doesn't like the guy" but in fact she does like him because she gives it to him... With the pretext of a free night stay.
She might say "I don't really like this guy" but in her eyes he's an alpha.
Redpill much??
@@joshuadevsimmz6396redpill is a collection of many men observing the same confusing behaviors from women
A coping mechanism because deep down she knows he wont commit to her?
@filipposa212, I understand what you are saying but it's actually a little more nuanced than you think. When she says doesn't like him, she means she doesn't see/want a long term relationship with him. However, he might be a great fuck that when coupled with a temporary need, she can justify to herself sleeping with him. In her view she gets two things that night: a great fuck and place to stay for free. And furthermore, she rationalizes that he got something out of the deal too. When you think about it, her position is quite rational.
@castro Smart
You left out that the guys they want relationships with, don't want relationships.
They put these obstacles because of insecurity. Same way if you´re insecure you test the relationship so much it becomes toxic and the person leaves. They are sabotaging the relationship because deep down they don´t believe they are deserving. For men, this is good. The one putting obstacles is an insecure one and you should move along.
You just told my last relationship with a insecure woman
You just described my last relationship
That's exactly what's happening. People are getting brain damaged by those who stay trigger ready to pounce on any and everything with money. Who gonna pay for the neurological damage? How can stupid work when it can't steal or make up a new role?
Very astute comment my good sir
I hope my brain work to do this. What happens to most men that are in desire for a relationship is that they get scam and play. IF im invested, I likely not want to move along.
I used to be okay with a bit of chase, I like the hunt, it's the game in the end. But with MeToo and women not being traditional at all nowadays, my tolerance for the "chase me" attitude is WAY lower, even if there are other indicators that she likes me.
It's unfortunate cause I've seen some women really wanting me to keep approaching but the there's also the danger of becoming one of her "fans"... they've shot themselves on the foot big time.,
You both Lost. You refused to play thé game, to keep approaching and to reassure the woman , so nothing happened. It's a loss for both. A high value Woman, respectful,traditional or partly traditional don't sleep with a man easily ! How Can your get a traditional woman if you refuse to be a traditional man ? If you refuse to do the approaching and the pursuit ?
@@carynefuture5778that's because the numbers of decency in women are no longer there. It's directly correlates to the lax standards for decency in women. There is always a bleed over effect from standards in a society that still gives people free will. This can be either good or bad depending on what society and culture promote. Tradcons will recognize this but nevertheless still push you towards the slaughter house changing nothing. When Jesus met that harlot he forgave her and said sin no more. Society always goes in cycles away from righteousness and turn back only when the death and suffering are unbearable. Sad that we have to constantly learn the same lessons over and over
@@carynefuture5778 Basically what the other guy in these comments said, I can't be traditional, because the vast majority of women aren't. A 20 yo with less than maybe 10 notch count nowadays is actually pretty rare, so , on a bounce of probabilities, why should I be traditional when most women haven't?
You gotta remember, that in this field it's women who set the standards, and rn the standards are set to low investment + numbers game, on the man's side.
Plus as you gain experience as a guy, you feel women and to a certain extent know how experienced she is, women who haven't been promiscuous, when they like you, tend to be shy and sweet, even their voice is quieter, tend to be more compliant and nice, which if you're a "high value man" at least in terms of morals, you'll see this and treat her well.
Most women aren't deserving of good treatment nowadays, it doesn't even work to get them, I'm not saying being an asshole is the only answer, but again, on a bounce of probabilities, it'll be way more effective. Men aren't idiots, we just do what works. Period.
You can't ask a man to treat 100% the way a 1% would deserve. Most women are non-paid prostitutes, just the facts.
Modern traditional women are the most toxic ones.
They are not like our grandmas.
I feel like this contradicts some of the other things you have said women should do …
In all fairness, us men also get anxiety, and act weird with the women we really like. We are more indifferent with the women we are less attracted to, and those are the women we usually sleep with on a regular basis.
Women use that to gauge if you have had (attractive) women before. If you show indifference to an attractive woman (esp one with an overinflated ego), she goes nuts.
He’s assuming she slept with this man, she didn’t. She used him for a place to stay.
I was thinking the same. Women take advantage of simps all the time.
if she said that she didn't like him, it might be safe to assume that she couldn't control him and also safe to assume that he would have kicked her out if she gave no cookie.
She hang around with that guy before. Hanging around and staying in his house means they probably banged before. She has some trust in him. Btw women booty calls men for place to stay all the time. Also for free dinners.
Even if that would be true, she ruined her chances with him that night.
I would really like to see a collaboration with Orion Taraband and Sadia Khan. That would be insights to the deepest levels.
It is always great to be the man they regretted being with
Is it though? Being part of the larger cultural problem is great?
Leave him alone is best advice ever. This guy giving you the cheat codes.
If you want to play the game in easy mode check out my boy Casey Zander.
It's really strange to hear this for me. I don't have casual stuff with people I don't like, and if I sleep with a guy, it means I would like to date them.
But somehow it still ends up with me being the only one who plans dates or wants to advance the relationship. They just want to have sex on their terms and don't offer the emotional side of the relationship. And then I leave. I really think I want to try dating guys who want to be my friend first and not sleep with anyone until I know they also like me as a person.
Sucks to be a no hassle good times girl who supports their dreams and puts my needs on hold only to find out they want a "no expectations" situation :( makes you feel like the wonderful relationship you want to offer is some kind of a disgusting deadly disease to them.
LOL: Only asexual (or homosexual) men don't want to have sex with women. Accept it. And if you really belieVed what you just said: date one of the guys in your friendzone right now!
If he doesnot want you around after sex, you offer too little, Not too much outside the bedroom - or you just chose players who never had any intentions for a serious relationship or a family (yet).
They don't want success, they want DRAMA and victim stories to tell each other and "someone to pay for me" not "someone to love". Someone good is BORING to them.
When a woman truly wants you, she makes it very easy. High good-times/hassle ratio.
If you ever find yourself wondering if a woman is interested in you.... she isn't.
If a woman implies, or flat out tells you, you're going to wait for sex, the sex is NEVER worth the wait.
Yes. If she keeps you wondering for a week or two whether she likes you, then she is not into you. That means you should block her and delete her contact. Never waste time on a woman who is not into you.
I agree and disagree.
One of my best girlfriends/sexual partners told me (in the middle of fooling around) "We're going to wait 3 months before we have sex."
Without batting an eye, I said "Sure." And we continued to fool around.
What happens? We have sex a week later. A great relationship that lasted a few years until she had to go away for school.
My logic? "Oh ho ho ho ho.... I ALREADY wasn't getting laid. I can wait just as long as you."
Men have to play it cool, and understand that they have PLENTY of options-- Just don't act frustrated when the lady you're chasing initially waves you off.
She is interested in the guy she is making wait. Its just that the interest is purely financial rather than physically. Its the beta side of hypergamy.
The only time waiting matters is when you are a virgin and want to stay still till getting married.
Disagree. A healthy women does not want to sleep with a man before she knows his personality. Normal women bond with sex and do not want to bond with the wrong man.
"Take it slow" will never work unless you're a virgin with physical proof. Even then, it's not so much of a plus as counteracting the negative. Plus, if he ever finds out you used to play lose and fast with random lesser men, you just killed any chance of marriage.
My wife was a first generation Chinese immigrant. She moved in with me less than 2 weeks after we met. She was a virgin, and not aggressive at all, just wanted to stake out the best prospect before it gets taken. I was fit, 6' tall, made low 6 figures straight out of college. She was a head shorter than me, not particularly pretty, cooks and cleans, but not particularly well. Today, we have a son and built a business that yield mid 6 figures. It's also seasonal, so we have 5 month long vacations out of the year. She wasn't dealt a great hand, but played it well. All it took was acting rational instead of playing women's mind games. Meanwhile, plenty of women ruin a great hand by following women logic.
She moved in with u two weeks after u met? She wasnt pretty and couldnt cook?? She wanted security and u got played!! Sounds like mail order bride!! It is what it is!!! But u built a life together and that is commendable!!!
@@chercher304 Yeah, this guy is a prime example of how we gaslight our own reality and also an example of how everyone is so different that personal truths and values about the world have great degree of variance. Personally, someone moving in with me after 2 weeks says a lot. About both people. Especially the way this is described
Once again hitting us with pure gold. Insane.
It’s often hard to listen to your truths, but this one is amazing.
And a large part of the problem is that women have lost sight of the primary principle of "making a guy wait" in order to get him to commit. The POINT is to _demonstrate that you are not easy to get such that you're not likely to be easily gotten by other guys" - fidelity. But the problem here, is trying to play that game when you have a demonstrated history of yes, you ARE easily gotten by any number of guys, even guys you don't actually like. That completely nukes the whole premise of any "making a guy wait" game. This then has the OPPOSITE effect. Not ONLY can I see that you ARE easily gotten by other guys, but because you make me wait, I'm going to assume you like me less than ANY of those other guys who easily got you and you're MORE likely to cheat with ANY other guy just as easily as all the other guys who got you with NO EFFORT, WITHOUT being made to wait.
Bingo, well said… If you make one wait, you gotta make ALL of them wait…
their aim is to deceive and lie to the man that commitment is expected from
I do remember the sidewalk in downtown Montreal where I found 10 $ in the summer of 1985.
Man I wish you were around back when I was in my 20's and 30's.
I'm liking and commenting before the ad is even over because I know this is gonna be a great video.
and indeed it was brilliant
This is why it's better to be the F'boy. Women tend to bond through sex so if you sleep with them they will eventually try to start a relationship. If she doesn't, she's probably broken. Assuming she's psychologically OK, and you like her, then you can agree to the relationship, BUT you are in the enviable position of having set the expectations low and having her chase you. This is sooo much better than simping your way into a relationship because female expectations are a one way ratchet.
That's false. Ain't no way he clean or his sperm good quality. He a throw away just like what he is doing. His DNA all messed up and his sex addiction gonna grow and start remixing. That's risky. Nobody is off limits.
That's the player mindset, more or less. (like worded in a previous video): Women usually hate being labeled as "a 1 night stand" so you bank on her coming back to you wanting to meet up again, so you have the leverage, and perhaps end up casually dating for a few months. If she doesn't (the old-fashioned "He never called" context) then she'll write you off as "all you guys are the same!, jerk." Not for me, but I got some friends that do this...I will say that it did end up backfiring a few times, often times a girl they start really liking breaks it off to start actually dating another guy; One friend got so jealous (because he wanted to be the "new boyfriend" and realized he wasn't honest with her when he said he wanted "only friends with benefits") he blew up her new BF (they we're all co-workers) with angry & drunk text massages..Ended up losing his job over it, lol.
The problem for men (and society) is that most men (lower 50-70%) aren't attractive enough to be F-boys.
@@Tgogators sounds like she was trying to stir up trouble, literally sleeping with two guys from the same work environment. 3.5 billion guys on the planet and she chose another one, metaphorically, in the adjacent cubicle. Your friend should realize what she was, a snake or a narcissist. He should count his blessings
Relevant to the topic in the video but not a very efficient solution to something that doesn't have to be so difficult. What if you just become a passport bro and have women+hypergamy work in your favor because of the non-western cultures and traditions?
The whole one-night-stand thing is seemingly vastly misunderstood as guys just think it is easy to play that game. But if that is what you want, you have to really, really understand the rules, limitations and the boundaries that come with playing that game. I have seen too many guys that went from what was meant to be a one nighter to a dysfunctional, fulltime relationship. Simply because guys want a stable supply of good s*x and if that is what he gets, and he doesn't know any better, he can lose his leverage and the ability to walk away.
If you understand the game, you know when to walk away, even when you "feel" like staying. The playboy is a way of life, not just some quick nuts that need to be busted with the lowest effort possible. It is more complicated then that my dudes.
Good times to hassle ratio? BRILLIANT!
This guy was in HIS BAG today! I must've done like 3 standing ovations to this video before it ended. 😆👌🔥
Thanks! One of the best so far!
Keep these coming big dawg
This man always talks truth... THumbs up my friend.
Ohhhh!!!! I loved this!!!! What a very revealing scenario that perfectly describes my current situationship!
Been waiting for this one
Another brilliant show!
I wish these videos were around when I was younger
Probably your best episode to date 👌
Would this not result in women simply being ran through by innumerable men? Maybe advocating that your daughter give herself to whatever man she’s interested in is not the best advice from a psychological perspective. I understand some of your points on this, but considering one of the bigger complaints of men today is that they can’t find a woman who hasn’t been with so many men, it seems like this advice is counterintuitive to long-term healthy relationships.
I think a daughter might benefit from being advised that it’s ok to have sex Very early in the relationship, but not with every man you date/meet. Each man has his own body count acceptable range which varies widely. Personal experience: married 27yrs, had sex w/hubby on first date. Body count less than 10.
Well this is why s"x was reserved for marriage. The problem was solved.
Now we have these problems because ladies have made s"x conditionally free but still try to use it as if it has value. It doesn't make any sense.
Dr. Orion 👍🏿.......Much Love From Ghana 🇬🇭
Quite the titillating watch, Dr. Taraban. Something about your delivery firmly pinned me into my feminine. Very high good time/informative to hassle ratio. Do it again, please😊
omg, dude you're so great at explaining these issues! Thank you!
10:22 noooo if you don’t really like the guy, don’t give him a chance at all. men’s mental health is in crisis and this is one of the biggest reasons why. stop stringing along men knowing he will never have a shot at anything outside of the friendzone.
The friendzone is cold storage for men judged to be a potential future Mr. Cleanup.
*DO NOT* be Mr. Cleanup.
even porn stars string their male co-stars who want to date or marry them, for years. Watch bellesa house (the interview parts: anna foxx and adria rae).
Well this is was so spot on that- you pretty much covered it. 😂 the only thing that came to mind was that I did this more in my early 20s when I had no idea what I was doing in terms of sex and dating. I remember a guy I really liked got mad at me for having sex with someone a year prior to us meeting who I wasn’t serious with, but was making him wait. I tried to explain the ‘why’ behind it being I liked him and didn’t want to rush anything (it made sense to me at the time lol) but didn’t understand my perspective and never let that go.
My dating style and understanding of how men view sex vs women has drastically changed since then though and I completely agree with not making obstacles for the men that we do like. Sometimes we do this subconsciously though because insecurities do pop up. and fear takes the wheel. Loving this series & great brain food as always!
Men: Women R Biologically Programmed 2 Lie…..Remember dat.
lol sorry your comment said “rain food” at the end made be laugh out loud. Thank you I needed that.
Yea it’s odd that other women don’t really understand this. Either you make all man wait or none. Hiding the cookie jar from the man you actually like is literally shooting yourself in the foot.
@@MOMO-m0m0 I get that! So it’s kind of similar to the advice you hear today from some other speakers on this subject about men losing respect for women who have sex too soon. Obviously things are more complex depending on our personal values, beliefs, etc, but I specifically remember being told if you had any hopes of securing a commitment from the guy you were aiming for he’d value you more if had to work for it. That was like… 12 years ago though👵🏽
@@samueltemple4358 I just saw that- whoops! 💀
the restaurant analogy was crazy good at the end
Absolutely awesome 👏 you nailed it again!
Doctor trys to educate women even though they probably won't accept it. Because they don't feel like it. Still, I appreciate it, doctor.
Just brilliant insight. Just how men think.🎉
Thank you very much Dr. T. This one was enlightening.
Epic video Dr. That leave em alone x3 killed me 🤣
If her friend was that way, chances are the GF was that way too. Very telling. You are who your friends are. Idk how women can do that.
Being a guy, maybe it'll sound not good from my side, but that girl's modus operandi seemed much like prostitution in exchange of some food and shelter. I wonder where does one's dignity go.
Yes unfortunately the hive-mind mentality is strong with many women. That's why bad advice can be very damaging. It multiplies quickly, ruins many lives by shooting down genuine guys with genuine intentions, then women end up with cucks and f-boys, lonely with 40 they ask "where are all the good men?" Tragic..
9 out of 10 women are like that.. But none of them will ever admit it..
Man, you just ruined my life. All those one night stands were failures and my ex actually liked me?
....yes, probably
@@mrblank-zh1xywhat does this person mean by that comment?
I love this youtube channel and its so true! I always know what Im doing.
I LOVE this content! Very eye opening! Thank you!
My God it makes my blood boil. How can they be like this? Giving it to a guy they don't like for a place to stay? I can't man.
Once you understand that women are overgrown children and operate on their emotions and not logic, your blood won't boil when dealing with them
It's not as clear cut like that. Remember she had the option to sleep at her friends place, but she found the better option was to have a nice time with that guy while saving money and also not bordering her friend. It Isn't like she finds the guy grotesque, she's just luke warm about him.
@@idesel
That's worse. That makes you a *convenience* rather than a grudging burden.
Is this your first day? Relax … it gets worse the higher you lift that rock 🤣
@@P46430
"First time? 😏"
Sounds like bad advice, but a fantastic way to create all those high body count women you object to. The optimal strategy would seem to be one that makes men and women pay the same price per copulation. This price is paid in opportunity cost, diminished value, and various forms of financial exchange. Included in this calculation involves a certain amount of waiting to ascertain value. It's hard to see in any scenario where early sex is net beneficial to women.
yet there is an epidemy of single-motherhood all around in developped countries. It must be beneficial to them
@@janushomer9111 one of the dangers of sex is pregnancy. Women bear the higher costs of sex without commitment and that includes single motherhood. I wouldn't call it a benefit, but making the best of a bad situation.
@@earth_and_spice Pregnancy is not a danger anymore. This is not the ice age. You have like 30 forms of birth control
@@janushomer9111birth control isn't 100%. Women get pregnant on birth control all the time. Sex is VERY risky only for women. A man cam walk away, the woman is stuck
@@earth_and_spiceDangers? It's the natural result of that activity... it's what our biologies try to achieve. You have it backwards.
Another banger from Orion.
You are the master Dr Orion 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Very well said. I’m married, I met my wife while she was on a bachelorette trip in New Orleans (my home town). I told her I’d be her date at the wedding. We Skyped every day. I drove to Atlanta a couple of weeks later to be her date at the wedding. That was our first sexual encounters. I’ve gone on record with her that after taking the 9 hour drive on Friday night to be her date at the wedding that Saturday and we didn’t have sex, I wouldn’t have called her back. Everything was very romantic from the night we met leading up to wedding. And the fact that we had a long distance relationship for a while thereafter kept it fun as week because we weren’t constantly in each others space and I got gf opportunity to miss her.
I’ve also had the opposite experience before her where things got hot and heavy and the girl said, “We should be doing this?” If we’ve gotten passionate and I can term it want to but it’s turned into a game of cat and mouse, my interest is gone,
The problem is that 80% of women only pursue the top 10% of men. You're basically advising behavior that will more than likely have them pumped and dumped by the men they do like.
This is what I also thought! I was in Dubai!
Expats in Dubai are generally in great shape, high income, have interesting successful life.
It seemed they expect to have sex right away kind of attitude on dating app.
I would assume it would be pump & dump situation for the women who do that there!
Which is grea!!! When they get pumped and dumped enough, the PAIN will help them become more aware.
That's a great counterargument example for women who I hear say that rebuttal all the time. And it's so true.
Dating explained simply and clearly. Thanks doctor!
3 date rule. If she is difficult in the honeymoon phase then it's a bad sign of horrible things to come!
3 date rule? You won't have Real wife material with such a rule! They won't have low body count if they sleep After 3 dates only...Traditional or partly traditional women take timer, a few months even. UP to you to see what you really want....
But the ones who pretend to be sweet at first are the real danger. They are very calculating, and usually aim for material comfort; using the men as vehicles. Naive young men tend to fall for these tricks. Until the realization dawned on them, they have wasted years of their lives and brought children into the world. So be thankful that they show you who they really are within the 1st 3 dates.
Is it even a honeymoon anymore?
My rule is 30 minutes :D
@@andersnielsen6044Eating others' leftovers is the fastest way to get food.
It sounds plausible but it goes completely against the behavioural principle of valuing what you put in effort into earning much more than what came too easily. No way is that not true.
Yes men might call you back for easy sex but they will not put you into the relationship category. That’s why casual situationships and FWB almost never convert to real relationships.
Need a place to stay ;)
What he is saying doesn't go against the logic of what is valuable is what is scarce and rare. If you give easy sex to undeserving men, your sex is devalued. He is suggesting you give out sex to the men you like, and preferably to them only, as good and as fast as the urge comes. Don't make the men you like feel like a sucker: don't make him wait, dont be promiscuous. But if you have been promiscuous, be sure to give him the best sex you possibly can. Reward your partner
@@gonzalodaniel6783 I’m gonna have to respectfully disagree because my personal experience and many men I’ve spoken to says otherwise. A lot of high value men lose respect for women who give it up too quickly and immediately write them off as party girls and not marriage material. Most married men I’ve asked about this told me how they “really had to work for it” with the women they ended up marrying. Like jumped through hoops. And in retrospect - they acknowledged that had those women slept with them on the 1st date, there’s a high chance they’d have never seen them again.
@@gonzalodaniel6783 in addition - what does that even mean “men you like”? Rarely if ever do women sleep with men they don’t like. You may like him and want a relationship - whereas he on the other hand has zero intention of getting serious with you. But says that he does in order to get laid. Men do this all the time.
Also - this whole concept of being your sluttiest self with the man you want is predicated on men knowing who you’re dated before them. This may only be true in very small tight-knit communities, but most certainly not in big cities where you meet ppl on dating apps, and none of them will ever know who you’ve been with and what you’ve done before them.
Never mind the fact that according to this logic - you gotta beat “his previous sluttiest gf” - not “your sluttiest self”, which is really irrelevant.
@@annatalig2565 the fact that many men here, incluiding a specialist, are stating otherwise should give you food for thought. I shouldn't be fast, necessarily. Rather not full of obstacles. Comes across as manipulative and punitive. No woman with any self worth would should be having sex on the first date, anyway... But that doesn't mean the alternative is to make someone purposefully wait for months. Whoever does that better make sure to remain sensual and romantic and seem genuinely invested throughout, or else it very well be enough for that man to grow tired or insecure
Boy does this sound exactly as what happened to me. Thanks for another great video
“Any port in a storm “ quote from girl I almost fell for - heard more than once
I’ve heard this so many times from women and in their heads in makes logical sense. I’m really attracted to you so I won’t sleep with you on the first date because I really like you and want to see you again. So if you would sleep with me if you weren’t attracted to me? That literally makes no sense and is an instant turn off.
S"x is just a tool for them to manipulate the social environment. For us, it's the key to life.
if women do the right things with wrong men then the natural conclusion is never to be the right man
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Hence the current dating market
Great episode!