alli e a few years back one told me that nonsense. He wanted bf benefits without the title of relationship I run that sucker out of my face. He hunted me down for a social media trying to find me somehow he found my profile on a dating site reached out. I asked what changed oh the other female dumped him. I told him I wasn't his backup plan and to never contact me again, instant block and delete.
If he has to choose between me and someone else. Don't choose me. You should never want a man who has you lined up as one of his many options ... I would never compete with another woman for a spot in a mans life ..
Ver'Lexus Harmon. Amen to that! Someone tried that with me years ago, but it backfired on him. That doesn't work with me. If you're telling me about all the other women who want you or you can get because you're trying to get me to do or agree to something you want, you can kick rocks. You can go be with those tricks, because you're telling me you can't be trusted & you're probably already screwing them. I have no time for that.
Ver'Lexus Harmon I've gone through this myself recently. He wanted me to compete for him with his ex girlfriend that he was still talking to and the females he was having sex with. So, I just had to say goodbye
Ver'Lexus Harmon Happened yesterday to me, the guy I was messing with. We kinda fell off, and I asked if I could get another chance. He asked me, if I want him to be real with me. And of course, I said yeah. And then that’s when he tells me, that “ he’s talking to a girl, but they’re just friends; and that he has to see where it goes with her, before he gives me another chance.” I straight up sent laughing emojis and told him I was not going to be his second choice. And that I wish them the best, and that it amazes me how fast he moves. I could tell he didn’t like me standing up for myself. Because of his reply, but oh well. I refuse to let a guy treat me like a backup. Mother fucker got me all types of fucked up lol.
“Let’s just see what happens” means “let’s just see if something better comes along.” Guys like this are not ready for commitment. I’ve dated so many guys like this. When I met my now husband he knew exactly what he wanted. He was ready for a committed relationship. He had his education right, his job right, everything in place. Of course, while dating I still supported and encouraged him to get that second masters degree and move for that better job but he still had it together. We discussed marriage, kids, our futures early and often knowing it was always our destination if things worked out. This “let’s just see what happens” will end up being a waste of time!
Armed with this info, I had that convo with a guy and he hit me with 'let's see what happens/where things go.' I didn't argue or look displeased, nothin. What happened was he was no longer a priority - stopped responding right away (sometimes not responding at all), stopped initiating texts. He became someone I would respond to if I was bored. Let's just see what happens when my attention no longer strokes your ego. Not playing games. Boy Bye.
celifacejones Bruh told me let's just ride the wave but wanted 2 fuck.......I told him ok. Idk if he still riding that wave or not I left his ass alone. Lol! FOH with that shit!
I remember a guy said "let's just see what happens". I responded "oh, that means I can see other guys". He didn't like that and wanted us to date exclusively. lol
Every man that has said this phrase to me ended up being a waste of time. It doesn't matter if he got himself and his life together. If this is his mindset, you need to cut it. It's not worth the heartache.
Junine Mendez I love when Steve Harvey, advised a caller once to stop giving dudes credit for stuff that has nothing to do with how he treats you (e.g. his job, his family, how he parents, his personality). It's so easy to do, but it attaches to value to something that has no real value in our lives. Men (on average) do not do that.
When a guy say let's just see what happens, he doesn't care about you and he has other "options". Run to the hills and don't look back. I rather for a guy to say "Let's make it happen".
sometimes he doesn't have other options but somehow thinks he can do better than you and wants to see if he got better options, and when he doesn't find better or get dumped, he comes back! That's when us ladies got be strong and ignore his him like he ignored us. Been there, done that! And believe me ladies there are better men out there and you will get over the ex when you realize that.
Nimco M that’s what I did after I dump his ass I believe he was seeing another girl ( maybe while me and him was dating) and I guess something didn’t work out but he ended up trying to reach out to me but he was blocked again
Unfortunately, this foolishness doesn't necessarily stop at a certain age. I'm 55 and the over 45 dating pool is just as murky and polluted as the one filled with younger men. I do believe I am done trying.
Angel Star That's because the over 45 are the ones misleading the younger men. I've witnessed a man try to coach a younger one to sample women and etc. Yes "sample". Enough said.
@Regina Patrice That's right, girl! A truly godly man won't play knuckle head games like this. Stay strong & keep your standards high. I believe God can & will honor those who trust Him to right man in their lives.
Tenzee Choenyi yeah that's today's line. Let's just go with the flow. OK I got your just go with the flow shit. Smh these men of today I'll tell ya sis.
I don't know if you agree, Derrick, but a man who I respect once told me, "You should never wonder where you stand. You should never ask where you stand. It the the man's responsibility to let you know."
That's true. But by these days, better make things clear early on. No place for assuming you're on the same wavelength to end surprised by the difference of your thinking. The funny thing is when you come to know you were not on the same wavelength, he tries to hold you accountable for your own disappointment.
Some men are so inconsiderate, meaning they aren't considerate of your heart and your time when they decide to string you along for their pleasure. So they tell you "let's just see what happens" to keep you around. Sad but true, been there, done that and won't allow it again. 💕👍
shogun harlem he can say that. Some women are the same and want to take their time in trusting a guy. I agree trust is earned but he can say that and be clear.
@shogun harlem I agree. He might want to see what he is dealing with before committing. But that means he should be keeping his stuff in his pants as well until he is confident he wants to move forward. Ive talked to many brothers were complaining that he "didn't know she wuz crazy" because he had started having sex with her too soon. Yes, men must be as circumspect as women when it comes to dating. The problem arises, particularly for women, when men a man clearly understands his own intentions to dip without commitment, and strings her along with false hope.
I'm sick and tired of being told, "let's just see what happens. I'm not ready to rush into anything". You're not ready for a relationship but you sure are ready to commit to having sex, inviting women over to "Netflix and chill" though. These are men between the ages of 36-40 I get this bullshit from.
Connie P. it's sad they don't want to take you out on a date or go out their way to do anything nice for you, but want to lay up in your house and have sex with you. Pitiful
"Let's just see what happens..." "Ok, two options for 'what happens'.... Either we get together, and have a relationship, or I walk out that door to find someone who knows what's gonna happen."
@@bamilekewoman373 well if it's CONSTANTLY "Let's see what happens" for YEARS.... There's no other choice. Give him an ultimatum that either you build together or leave his ass in the dust. If he won't build together, then his goals aren't in line with yours.
LMAO!!! Thank you!! I started my bullshit marathon this morning after he asked if I was going to prepare breakfast all I said with a smile on my face was "Let's see what happens" and continued getting ready. The expression on his face was priceless!!!
Omg Derrick! My husband and I just had an argument about this an hour ago!! This is a sign! He told me this same line regarding something very important going on within our household that could potentially mess up our relationship. He got angry because I wouldn't accept his "let's see what happens" . I told him straight up that he's a bull crapper and has no intentions on working with me to solve this problem. He's been putting this off for far too long and using this phrase just to shut me up and not have to be responsible for his actions or the outcome. Ladies, if a man says this to you he has absolutely NO plans and isnt willing to create any! Trust Derrick on this!
“Let’s just vibe”= I want you to like me and I want to have the perks and exclusivities that come with a relationship w/o being in one so I’m free to mess around with other women. Please run from the “let’s just vibe” men. I had to learn the hard way.
I went through that for 2 years. It went from "I want to see this grows and blossoms. I've rushed before.." blah blah. And after that I don't entertain it anymore. I'm very picky on who I give my time too. Nothing worse than time wasted.
I dislike when some men say that. I'm the type that it's best for him to tell me straight up look "it's this or that". Don't sugarcoat me to spare my feelings...I'm a big girl, I can handle it. My time is valuable & wasted time is a wound that never heals.
Wow a womans intuition is usually right... Seriously ladies let's not delude ourself. If they want to tslknthey will call or text... If they want to see you they will and if they want you they would make it known... I have to tell myself this over and over!!!
This is hitting home with me tonight, I'm just getting back into dating after a 3 year relationship. Been single a year now and finally want to start dating, I've already seen and received messages from guys that "just want to go with the flow" or aren't sure if they want a relationship...I already know I'm a catch, so yall need to know we have goals. We want dating to lead to something and progress, so if y'all not about that please sit down and let the real men stand up. Thank you
Man these brothers is mad you out here messing up they game lol. This was 100% on point! Soon as dudes try that over here I start treating em like how they trying to treat me. Give em the run around, take forever to respond to texts, don't answer the phone, always got an excuse for why we can't ever hang out etc...till they stop calling or texting 😂😂😂
I'm not the "Let's Just See What Happens" kinda woman. My time and my space are precious to me and I'm not wasting it with any more men who are still wandering around in the wilderness of life. #BoyBye
I have a let's see what happens Lots of lies cheating ,never owning up to it Selfish ego manic .never an us or we. I needed to hear this Broke my heart so bad I had a heart attack from the pain.
When he says "let's just see what happens"-🏃 run for the hills. I have two associates that were told this by their men of 4 & 10 years and their still waiting on the proposal after 3 to 5 children. This just breaks my heart. So sad...
Ha! True! I had a guy say “I want to build a friendship first cuz its the right thing to do”. My respnse was great to know cuz I know other men that are interested in more then friends & I needed to know where to focus my energy. I even asked him if he was the minimal possible effort type of guy, you know just sticks around enough so you dont forget him. He said yes. I said see you later and he said “I look forward to getting to know you more”. He wasnt giving up. I told him I dont invest daily interaction with my guy “friends” cuz if your just a friend its for a reason like business. I told him we have no reason to be friends. haha Then I played the song Gone from Montgomery Gentry
Aimee Montgomery I dont date my friends and I let a guy know upfront if he wants a friendship its platonic. So when a guy says that to me its pretty air tight what my inentions will be with a friend.
I've been told this before in the past. My favorite line is, "I don't like to put labels on things", 😂 I have accepted that I will be single for the rest of my life & I will die alone. 😢
One day that happened to me, i got out of the car after the date and I said; "I dont like my time to be wasted so thank you for everything." It was our 10th date, and he said "nah what happened?" I said; it was nice meeting you this is our last date... lol he said "nah get in the car"... some guys like to play that stupid game to see if you're an easy target or hard to get... I can play that game...guess what happened after that? We got merried😉
The Mora's daily life congratulations! You set your standards and either he stepped up or you were stepping on! I wish you every happiness you deserve the very best!
I. fucking . LOVEEEE you for your realness. . like I'm that girl that DOES NOT stick with a man that has mixed signals.. the whole "maybe we'll end up together , you never know" "let's just see how everything goes" ... I see right through ALL that bullshit. I don't entertain it, literally me and my fiancé right now been dating for 4.5 years now and only 2 weeks within talking he ALREADY told me he loves me and he wants to me to be his wife. MY MAN LOCKED ME IN FROM THE JUMP , NO MIXED SIGNALS and I have NEVER EVER felt like I didn't know where he and I were headed, he makes me COMPLETELY comfortable with giving him my ALL, LIFE , DEATH, HAPPINESS, TEARS, THOUGHTS, like I'm LITERALLY unashamed of having sex with him during my period because HE WAS STRAIGHT UP WITH ME FROM THE JUMP. I feel blessed everyday , like I just have so much gratitude to this man. honestly I don't know how women STAY in a "let's see what happens" situation waiting on the man to waste her time. honestly, if a person wants to commit to you and ONLY YOU for the rest of his life, he will do it. no exceptions , no buts. when a man LOOKS at you, talks to you and is invested in exploring your soul ForEvER, he will not be worried about "let's see what happens" , a real commited man says "I know what's gunna happen, ima marry her and make her mine"... the only reason mfs say "let's see what happens" is so they have the open option to leave incase they find "better" ,whether it's a better looking woman, a different personality woman, , it's just another way of them telling you "you're not the one, but you can keep my next woman's seat warm in the meantime".. FOH. WOMEN, STOP HOPING. Let reality SPEAK FOR ITSELF, stop waiting on men who are not decisive About you from the jump.
I completely agree with you. I just went through this about 2 years ago. I knew it wasn't going to last but I tried to hang in there. I take full responsibility for my inability to let go of someone just because I loved him. Love is NEVER enough.
Last guy told me that and I accepted it only to learn the hard way , a year and a half later, what it really meant. Good guy, life together, but he didn't want to be in a committed relationship. Lesson learned and I'll NEVER accept that as an answer again. #MovingOn
TJ Mc yeah. Same happened to me for a year. But 6 months later I see him with his second new girl on fb and realized he actually could've put more effort in our relationship but never did and I let him. Never going to shut my voice again and please a man to get his love.
Joselyn548, I think because I am divorced and easily walked away from other guys in the past, I was ok with us taking our time. We actually did things like an exclusive couple, discussing future plans, going on trips, meeting friends and family, but then it just seems like he choked and backed off... I didn't ask him because I wanted him to take the lead and ask. I'm going to take my time and enjoy being on my own for awhile, but I really don't think I'll ever ask a guy where our relationship is heading. I'm looking for a man who is going to take the lead and make it known what he wants after a certain time. It's not like I sit back and let the guy control everything. I'm fine with expressing my interest, even initially, but I still think a man should lead. Ladies, is that a good approach? I've never really been in the dating "game" bc I married kind of young but this ish is crazy. I'm 40 and dealing with men a few years older who still want to be F* Boys or who are just not completely ready to settle down...
I fell for the "let's see what happens", let's just go with the flow", "why do we have to put a label on it" bullshit for 4 yrs. things had seemed to be going so well. Our relationship seemed to be growing and we seemed to be getting closer. I thought we were exclusive, he treated me like a girlfriend and I did "girlfriend" stuff for him. But when I expressed how I felt about him and our relationship and asked him where was this going. He goes off on about how he's not ready for a commitment, how he never said we were in a exclusive relationship, how he's single and we've just been having fun and that he talks to other women and even has had sex with other women, but that I'm number one.... I'm so done withnthe bullshit!
Lisa Jones Wow. I'm sorry you went through that for so long. Good women put up with so much. It's not fair. Hopefully we're all learning from these mistakes and will never repeat them.
Sometimes we ask that question too soon... or he doesn't know how to communicate the "I want to get to know you better and see if we are compatible" idea behind dating. Pull back a little (emotionally) and with your time. Keep your options and hobbies active & develop you!
Men know from the first interaction with you what they could do or be with you. Men are really great observers with a high sense of judgment. They know. Have some guys friends who told me honestly during discussions that they even know how they'd love to sex a girl whom they're interested in from the very first seconds! Till these days, I never buy a man "I don't know" anymore. He knows. He just doesn't want you to know what he really thinks. Period.
We are grown. He knows what he wants for his life. It is not about the woman. He knows if he is ready for marriage right now or not. It is that simple.
This happened. Confessed feelings and “let’s just see..” was their response. I let a couple days go by and then sent “This is my last text. Take care.” Glad to see this. It helps confirm my gut feeling.
LOL I'm a female that does that. Here's why: I don't know what to do between two different people. There are pro's and con's to each person but I have feelings for both. So... I use this method to give me time to choose which one is best. People think "If you don't pick me, and only me, you don't really want me". No, that's not the case. There's something about you that I am attracted to and I need to know what it's like to dip my foot in the pool before I jump in. That's what dating is when you meet more than one great person. Everyone is different. Some people love the sideline(s). However in my case, I just don't want to pick the wrong person if I choose one over the other. People put on this facade in the beginning. I'm not interested in that puppy love, rose-colored glasses bullshi*. If I say, "Let's just see what happens" I am biding my time to test you through multiple situations to see how you react or respond. So, this quote that men generally give out is not always a bad thing. But not knowing whether or not they're saying this is because they're testing you or they just want to fuc* you is what kills people the most. I'm honest about what I do and I tell people right off the bat this is how it is because of this and this reason. Most people aren't honest and that's why women are in fear when men say this. The problem is they put all their eggs in one basket. Don't ever wait for one man or woman when dating and unsure of "where it's going". Honestly, if you have to even ask that question you should already know the answer. When people are ready for something serious they'll tell you. Especially men.
Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and fix some of the foolish decisions I've made or gain my wasted time back.... but applied knowledge is power. Better to know now and apply it than to continue to walk in ignorance. Thanks so much for this video ! No matter how many times we've been hurt or how many games we've allowed ourselves to play in, a little reminder of the truth never hurts. Thanks so much!!!!! ❤️
You said it exactly right Derrick, it comes to a point in a woman or man life when we need to grow up and take shit seriously stop wasting other individuals time and your on time. Stop pausing ppl lives with B'S go in truthfully and except what you get back. STOP LYING TO HER/HIM, STOP LEADING A PERSON ON IF YOUR INTENTIONS IS TOTAL OPPOSITE OF THE OTHER PERSON FIND SOMEONE THAT EXCEPT WHAT YOU WANT DON'T LIE.😒 EVERYONE HAVE GOOD ONE!😊
U giving up the man code for real. Bravo!! Have you ever heard someone say “I ain’t got no mama, no daddy, no boss, no wife...”? I heard this from someone I dated for 3 years. Shame on me! Treated me well in most areas ... but wasn’t emotionally available and seemed commitment-phobic. Lots of healing needed for us both. Thank you Mr. Jaxn!
I've done this and cut this relationship off. it's stupid to think someone has time for the BS because I don't. I'm mom student and a hundred other rolls and a damn fool isn't one of them.
Lets just see what happens? If you really think about it, what kind of statement is that? Lets just see what happens when I waste my time with absolutely no prospects or foreseeable future with you because I just want to see. I have hear this statement before and I make the same decision every time. I just see what happens a when I don't bother answering his calls, give him the brush off, don't make myself available, and just keep moving forward. I see what happens, they feel some kind of way, try to put a half ass effort into things for the sake of pride, and then once it's bee realized that the bullshit isn't going to fly, they retreat and move onto the next one. I am so blessed that I am not stressed, pressed, or mixed with emotions fear and impatience. My 👑 king is out there and I will claim him all I'm die time. #ideserveit
After I stopped an ex and asked him "how many chances have I given you to get it right, his response was, " a lot but this last chance you didn't really give me a chance"... I'm looking like 😳😳😳 did this ninja really just say that
OMG so I'm listening to this video and my son over hears it and mind you he's 8..... He goes ma your friend telling the truth. Nobody gets themselves into anything without a plan or idea and we never run with the idea of let's just see what's happens. I laughed so hard ..... He goes ma I'm always thinking even if I don't say anything. Which hes the kid that's always dropping the I don't know line. 🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️ But ladies this is facts...... Any man that says that to you is just wasting time until he meets his ideal woman. Let that go and do you
I think this only applies if both parties on the same page.. As a woman I've told men let's just see what happens because I don't want to keep rushing into relationships just to get my heart broken again!! And so I say let's just see what happens so I don't put any sure guarantee on you too soon.. Cuz In the process of us getting super serious I might see a major red flag and want to bolt but then it can be too late because both parties feelings are already invested.. See if you dating for months going on a year and you still getting that response then run.. But other than that I think once both parties are on the same level of understanding and they both agree to let's see what happens then I don't see too much of a problem with it.. I wish I said that with some of my past relationships and took it slower 😂
I find this let's just see what happens idea to be nonsense myself. When someone does not have a plan they leave the other person to have to figure it out for themselves. I myself have seen this happen and believe me it's really hard when you got to say goodbye because there is no plan....there's nothing to look forward to. thanks for sharing
Well I learnt this lesson thank God..some friends of mine still keep on dating those loosers..they tell me I have to do the same..no thank you! I have better plans for me!!
Yeah... this person doesn't know if they want you. They aren't confident about you as someone they want to be with. It is probably very normal if the relationship is new and you two do not know each other very well... but also it seems like they don't really care where the relationship goes. It's like they don't care about you really. They aren't serious about ANYTHING!
Right but put them in the friendzone and dont give them sex, then all of a sudden it's a problem. 🤦🏽♀️😒 they're nor available anymore lol. Smh the games.
I am much older and wish this guy or anyone would have told me this when I was younger. I will only add men cannot committ until they know who they are and this includes how to provide. Also men when they are ready to marry, shop for a wife. They search for a wife...like a business. If women would treat their realtionships like a business, they would evaluate and cut their loss early...no return..you gotta go. If you are in a business and you do not receive what you bought, do you return....no.
I am on that same level. I am checking ho-facts too. I am checking for character, physical attractiveness, and the ability to protect and provide. If you check those boxes, we can proceed to the dating portion of the event. We get to know each other, see if we have chemistry, see if we should invest our time. Simple. Straight forward.
I told a guy "Let's just see what happens..." but it was genuine. That's all that I could offer him, we had only been talking for a few days and he was like "What's up ?"...Does that make me a jerk too ?? 😂😂
Francesca Robinson 😄😄😄I would say no not all, your not a jerk for saying that. I said that too to a dude the other day! Sometimes we women have to mirror these men's behavior not only so they can see how it feels but also to protect our hearts cause if we don't they sure as hell wont.
Francesca Robinson, not a jerk but possibly a poor communicator. Did you follow it up with legit, mature reasoning or did you just kill the conversation with "Let's just see what happens"? LJSWH and sub par excuses will make it jerk behavior. If it was genuine and you're just guarding your heart I'm sure you communicated adequately. Sometimes you don't went to say too much to a guy because he'll use it to play you. I believe Derrick is spitting truths from the male playbook. This isn't necessarily directed at female behavior because our playbook is different.
Talking for a "few days" why would you invest yourself in someone so soon? He wanted to claim your panties so badly! I think Derrick meant when 2 people are dating for a while and one keeps dragging the other one around. I know guys who have been in a relationship for over a decade, have 4 kids, and the women have been waiting for him to propose. and after all these years, he's still unsure about his decision, it turns from "let's see what happens to let's leave it like that, we have a good thing going, why mess this up." The men do the deal, the women must be smart enough to close it.
Dam so true! Went thru the same thing. "Go with the flow" did that.. Walked away after 6 years of BS and no plans. Lesson learned fa' sho' Thank you for your advice. You just dont know how stronger i feel each day learning something new! Thanks for utilizing your gift for something special. Which is, self love and growth! 😘
Thank you, Derrick! That’s exactly what I told already few guys I met recently, because it is ridiculous to hear such BS from the people in the their early 40s!!!!! Another great reply they give of the same nature is « Well, I don’t know the future! » The problem that they have a nerve to flip it on you and call you drama queen or whatever nonsense explanation they will come to their defense, when their real problem is actually them with their instability and insecurity issues, or simply sometimes they are just playing without even realizing that the time tick tacked their asses to the retirement and they are still single because they are « taking time »! Smh...
This message is the truth! I too am tired of the 'organic' bull shit. Heard that one too many times. A dude once told me when I asked him if we could see each other "Why are you trying to push things, let the universe bring us together?" I said because making plans is what people do. Can we see a movie, go for coffee etc?? What the heck!!!!! Pahty done!
“Let’s just see what happens!” Then you say to him: ok, I am out & goodbye. Block him. All the best with “let’s just see what happens.” Yes Derrick Yes 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
Wow! Thanks Derek! You were absolutely right....he looked good on paper, presented himself well.... but this same BS was told to me....by a 48 year-old jerk.... "Let's see what happens"...."Let's take it day by day". Yeah, I'm glad I blocked him... actually I went ghost on him. I didn't lose anything or gave anything away. I happily walked away.🙋
Amen brotha!!! This is the truth. My friend told me that I ask too many questions....bs. I also asked the million dollar question, What are your intentions as it relates to me? This blew him. He replied and got tongue-tied...lol. However, he can keep it movin.
I got the same response from an ex. Trust me that was a red flag from the jump!! I asked him where did he see himself 5 years from now, we were like 21 and he said he didnt know. i am like man are you serious? I didnt say anything but we were broken up by that time.
He's either PLAYING with you or PLANNING with you.........damn.........this is the best! relationship GUIDANCE ever.....ladies? I didn't learn none of this 'till I found this Channel......oh, yes, this is really, truthfully what we all are dealing with out there!
Sounds like he has different season's spring summer winter fall. He's keeping his options opened who ever he likes the most that's who he's going to choose if a man u been with for awhile can't put a title on what ever you mean to him even if he just see u as a friend he should be man enough to say that. That makes me think that he has season's other options and he's just not sure who he want so he juggles until he drops a ball.
Yup. I can't believe I put up with a jackass like that. Went from someone who said I'd never be shit in life to a guy who appreciates everything about me. Fucking idiot!!!
What he said "when he walked up to you, he had a plan" is so true! If they use this line on you. It means they don't want you to know what that plan is. Not everyone has good intentions with you.
Let's just see what happens = I don't have to be accountable for what happens with your heart in this process
Translation
Bihhhhhhh yesssssssssss girl u said it lol we in this together lol
Yes
Thank you
This.
Lol and these are the same guys that want you to be super loyal, super exclusive but without ever being official... I needed this 😂
alli e a few years back one told me that nonsense. He wanted bf benefits without the title of relationship I run that sucker out of my face. He hunted me down for a social media trying to find me somehow he found my profile on a dating site reached out. I asked what changed oh the other female dumped him. I told him I wasn't his backup plan and to never contact me again, instant block and delete.
Ms Reid that's the way to do it. There are too many good men out there to drop everything for one like that
Ms Reid Z YES QUEEN YES 🙌🙌🙌👏👏👏👏👏
alli e exactly either I'm the one & only or keep stepping. I got zero time to waste being a candidate which may not come to fruition
alli e 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾🔥
If he has to choose between me and someone else. Don't choose me.
You should never want a man who has you lined up as one of his many options ...
I would never compete with another woman for a spot in a mans life ..
Ver'Lexus Harmon. Amen to that! Someone tried that with me years ago, but it backfired on him. That doesn't work with me. If you're telling me about all the other women who want you or you can get because you're trying to get me to do or agree to something you want, you can kick rocks. You can go be with those tricks, because you're telling me you can't be trusted & you're probably already screwing them. I have no time for that.
Ver'Lexus Harmon I've gone through this myself recently. He wanted me to compete for him with his ex girlfriend that he was still talking to and the females he was having sex with. So, I just had to say goodbye
@Ver'Lexus YOU DAMN RIGHT!
Yessss
Ver'Lexus Harmon Happened yesterday to me, the guy I was messing with. We kinda fell off, and I asked if I could get another chance. He asked me, if I want him to be real with me. And of course, I said yeah. And then that’s when he tells me, that “ he’s talking to a girl, but they’re just friends; and that he has to see where it goes with her, before he gives me another chance.” I straight up sent laughing emojis and told him I was not going to be his second choice. And that I wish them the best, and that it amazes me how fast he moves. I could tell he didn’t like me standing up for myself. Because of his reply, but oh well. I refuse to let a guy treat me like a backup. Mother fucker got me all types of fucked up lol.
“Let’s just see what happens” means “let’s just see if something better comes along.” Guys like this are not ready for commitment. I’ve dated so many guys like this. When I met my now husband he knew exactly what he wanted. He was ready for a committed relationship. He had his education right, his job right, everything in place. Of course, while dating I still supported and encouraged him to get that second masters degree and move for that better job but he still had it together. We discussed marriage, kids, our futures early and often knowing it was always our destination if things worked out. This “let’s just see what happens” will end up being a waste of time!
My husband was ready too!!
You are speaking the truth. Let's see what happens means they are dating other women
omg this hit me🥺 why i don’t see this comment before i love my ex 😭😭😭
Preach queen!!! Yas!!!!!!
Armed with this info, I had that convo with a guy and he hit me with 'let's see what happens/where things go.' I didn't argue or look displeased, nothin. What happened was he was no longer a priority - stopped responding right away (sometimes not responding at all), stopped initiating texts. He became someone I would respond to if I was bored.
Let's just see what happens when my attention no longer strokes your ego. Not playing games. Boy Bye.
celifacejones Bruh told me let's just ride the wave but wanted 2 fuck.......I told him ok. Idk if he still riding that wave or not I left his ass alone. Lol! FOH with that shit!
celifacejones Amen
👏🏽👏🏽
Elmora B Not "Ride the wave" 😒🤣
😂😂😂😂
Love it!!
Simple: doesn't have plans for you in the future=lots of time and energy wasted.
I remember a guy said "let's just see what happens". I responded "oh, that means I can see other guys". He didn't like that and wanted us to date exclusively. lol
Diann Whitaker you tell him girl😀👏
Lmfao
Exactly true though!!
Diann Whitaker right Give there a taste of your own medicine
I might take your advice ha .
I'm close to tears. My armpits are sweaty, coz I don't want to accept this. The truth stings.
❤️🙏🏽
I hope things worked out for you
I’m praying for you as well. We’ve all been in this situation and it is hard. But as Derrick says this will clear the path for the man God has for u.
How are you now
Same sis.
Every man that has said this phrase to me ended up being a waste of time. It doesn't matter if he got himself and his life together. If this is his mindset, you need to cut it. It's not worth the heartache.
👍
Junine Mendez THANK YOU FOR THAT SIS. I APPRECIATE YOU
DEE J You are welcome hon. Stay blessed.
Junine Mendez I love when Steve Harvey, advised a caller once to stop giving dudes credit for stuff that has nothing to do with how he treats you (e.g. his job, his family, how he parents, his personality). It's so easy to do, but it attaches to value to something that has no real value in our lives. Men (on average) do not do that.
Kenya Simena Come through sis! Excellent point. Just because a man looks good on blueprint doesn't mean you can build something substantial with him.
When a guy say let's just see what happens, he doesn't care about you and he has other "options". Run to the hills and don't look back. I rather for a guy to say "Let's make it happen".
Amen
sometimes he doesn't have other options but somehow thinks he can do better than you and wants to see if he got better options, and when he doesn't find better or get dumped, he comes back! That's when us ladies got be strong and ignore his him like he ignored us. Been there, done that! And believe me ladies there are better men out there and you will get over the ex when you realize that.
Nimco M that’s what I did after I dump his ass I believe he was seeing another girl ( maybe while me and him was dating) and I guess something didn’t work out but he ended up trying to reach out to me but he was blocked again
That is the best statement... "Let's make it happen " Period.
Right. I know it takes time but we both need to want the same thing and both willing to do the work
He either going to play you or trade you. Women have too much talent to ride the bench!!!
Unfortunately, this foolishness doesn't necessarily stop at a certain age. I'm 55 and the over 45 dating pool is just as murky and polluted as the one filled with younger men. I do believe I am done trying.
Angel Star This is so true.
Angel Star That's because the over 45 are the ones misleading the younger men. I've witnessed a man try to coach a younger one to sample women and etc. Yes "sample". Enough said.
Please say it ain't so. Don't take away hope from the youth, lol.
@Regina Patrice That's right, girl! A truly godly man won't play knuckle head games like this. Stay strong & keep your standards high. I believe God can & will honor those who trust Him to right man in their lives.
God will bring the right man into your life if you trust Him. Don't fall for the okey doke
I am cracking up laughing. We gonna run plays, nope let's just see what happens. When a guy says that, he doesn't want you. Period.
my favorite part 😭😂
Been there, done that, moved on!!!
I've recently been seeing someone and his was "only time will tell". I guess there's different ways to say the same BS.
Mine said the same, never know what's going to happen
Mine said “let’s go with the flow”😡😡😡
Tenzee Choenyi yeah that's today's line. Let's just go with the flow. OK I got your just go with the flow shit. Smh these men of today I'll tell ya sis.
Mine also has said “only time will tell” or “let’s take it day by day” 🙄 hhhhhh
Tenzee Choenyi same and he also said let’s see where it goes Smh never again
I don't know if you agree, Derrick, but a man who I respect once told me, "You should never wonder where you stand. You should never ask where you stand. It the the man's responsibility to let you know."
That's true. But by these days, better make things clear early on. No place for assuming you're on the same wavelength to end surprised by the difference of your thinking.
The funny thing is when you come to know you were not on the same wavelength, he tries to hold you accountable for your own disappointment.
Yep, my mom always said when a man is into you, you know and when he's not into you you'll know
I'm dating men over 50 and they still pull this BS! Love your advice!!
He want the goods without the commitment just to waste your time and no he don't really want you
erica grant That's why I don't give the goods, especially if he's saying that. We have to have our own plans and not just attach to or fulfill his
And he never did.
Some men are so inconsiderate, meaning they aren't considerate of your heart and your time when they decide to string you along for their pleasure. So they tell you "let's just see what happens" to keep you around. Sad but true, been there, done that and won't allow it again. 💕👍
ItzAGirlzWorld yeah I just had a dude do me like that I had to move right along
Preangela Marks Yes maam, we're worth so much more than to be strung along.
ItzAGirlzWorld exactly
ItzAGirlzWorld 💯
Amen
He had a plan when he asked for my name, EXACTLY!
If he really wants you, there will be no confusions! “Let’s see what happens” seems like someone’s confused 🤷🏽♀️
No commitment!! Keep stepping he's playing games or Basically not ready for a relationship.
I had to learn this the hard way... Leave ladies... LEAVE!!!!!!
shogun harlem he can say that. Some women are the same and want to take their time in trusting a guy. I agree trust is earned but he can say that and be clear.
@shogun harlem I agree. He might want to see what he is dealing with before committing. But that means he should be keeping his stuff in his pants as well until he is confident he wants to move forward. Ive talked to many brothers were complaining that he "didn't know she wuz crazy" because he had started having sex with her too soon. Yes, men must be as circumspect as women when it comes to dating. The problem arises, particularly for women, when men a man clearly understands his own intentions to dip without commitment, and strings her along with false hope.
Sarah Windham yup had that happen to me last year never again lol
I'm sick and tired of being told, "let's just see what happens. I'm not ready to rush into anything".
You're not ready for a relationship but you sure are ready to commit to having sex, inviting women over to "Netflix and chill" though. These are men between the ages of 36-40 I get this bullshit from.
Connie P. Yes girl so true!
Connie P. men in theyre 50s do it too
Jesy Lu it's pathetic
Connie P. Some are in their 60s, and still haven't grown up. SMDH, I just stopped seeing a guy who said that and he is in his 60s.
Connie P.
it's sad they don't want to take you out on a date or go out their way to do anything nice for you, but want to lay up in your house and have sex with you. Pitiful
"Let's just see what happens..."
"Ok, two options for 'what happens'.... Either we get together, and have a relationship, or I walk out that door to find someone who knows what's gonna happen."
Love it! 💯
Preach!!!
Dang, girl! Way to FORCE a relationship! Good luck with that🤪
@@bamilekewoman373 well if it's CONSTANTLY "Let's see what happens" for YEARS.... There's no other choice. Give him an ultimatum that either you build together or leave his ass in the dust. If he won't build together, then his goals aren't in line with yours.
LMAO!!! Thank you!! I started my bullshit marathon this morning after he asked if I was going to prepare breakfast all I said with a smile on my face was "Let's see what happens" and continued getting ready. The expression on his face was priceless!!!
I LOVE THIS MANS ADVICE TIPS TRICKS THESE IMMATURE BOYS BE TRYING TO PLAY!! KEEP THEM COMING
Yep, there's a big difference between a man and a male.
Omg Derrick! My husband and I just had an argument about this an hour ago!! This is a sign! He told me this same line regarding something very important going on within our household that could potentially mess up our relationship. He got angry because I wouldn't accept his "let's see what happens" . I told him straight up that he's a bull crapper and has no intentions on working with me to solve this problem. He's been putting this off for far too long and using this phrase just to shut me up and not have to be responsible for his actions or the outcome. Ladies, if a man says this to you he has absolutely NO plans and isnt willing to create any! Trust Derrick on this!
SBNeo Yes, I heard this from my husband often... I filed for divorce after 8 years of bullish🤣🤣🤣
SBNeo Derrick bout to break up this marriage.
I got the comment, what ever happens, happens... it lands where it lands. Same nonsense
@@oORegularKevOo he didnt break up that marriage, it was probably already broken before this video!! Dont blame him.
What are you gong to do though SBNeo? I mean, you are married to the guy.
“Let’s just vibe”= I want you to like me and I want to have the perks and exclusivities that come with a relationship w/o being in one so I’m free to mess around with other women.
Please run from the “let’s just vibe” men. I had to learn the hard way.
This is the reason why you keep your heart guarded and your options open. And then they want you to be exclusive to them. Ain't happenin captain.
@@eddiethomasville3124 yep! 😂
@@eddiethomasville3124 go finish playing with yourself
With your weak ass channel 😂😂😂😂😂😂
@@eddiethomasville3124 you finished playing with yourself now huh
"Nope. We just gone see what the fuck happens"! Lol
A man tells me that it's time for me to go ✌🏽 see ya
Asha Sharron yess
Asha Sharron
Let him go ass hole
Haha go girl
Why?
I wish today, but still cleaning up the mess here.
I went through that for 2 years. It went from "I want to see this grows and blossoms. I've rushed before.." blah blah. And after that I don't entertain it anymore. I'm very picky on who I give my time too. Nothing worse than time wasted.
I dislike when some men say that. I'm the type that it's best for him to tell me straight up look "it's this or that". Don't sugarcoat me to spare my feelings...I'm a big girl, I can handle it. My time is valuable & wasted time is a wound that never heals.
Omg yes!! Finally someone is on the same page as me. Just tell me straight up. You just want sex? Say it! You want something real? Say it!!
Next time he calls to see you say, "Oh let's just see what happens!?"
GTFOH 😕
LOLOLOL YESSSSS!!!!...
Lmao for real. 😂
Hahahaha
Exactly!
RUUUUUNNNNNNNN AWAYYYYYYY!!! RUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNN!!!!
Nickie Rasberry 😂😂😂😂
Nickie Rasberry I need to
😂😂😂
Get the hellll on
Lol
Wow a womans intuition is usually right... Seriously ladies let's not delude ourself. If they want to tslknthey will call or text... If they want to see you they will and if they want you they would make it known... I have to tell myself this over and over!!!
This is hitting home with me tonight, I'm just getting back into dating after a 3 year relationship. Been single a year now and finally want to start dating, I've already seen and received messages from guys that "just want to go with the flow" or aren't sure if they want a relationship...I already know I'm a catch, so yall need to know we have goals. We want dating to lead to something and progress, so if y'all not about that please sit down and let the real men stand up. Thank you
Kim B. Amen!! Love this! I'm going through the same thing.
Man these brothers is mad you out here messing up they game lol. This was 100% on point! Soon as dudes try that over here I start treating em like how they trying to treat me. Give em the run around, take forever to respond to texts, don't answer the phone, always got an excuse for why we can't ever hang out etc...till they stop calling or texting 😂😂😂
I'm not the "Let's Just See What Happens" kinda woman. My time and my space are precious to me and I'm not wasting it with any more men who are still wandering around in the wilderness of life. #BoyBye
I have a let's see what happens
Lots of lies cheating ,never owning up to it
Selfish ego manic .never an us or we.
I needed to hear this
Broke my heart so bad I had a heart attack from the pain.
Beautymark Permanent Cosmetics Abd Advanced Skin Treatments I’m so sorry that happen to you this happen to me also
When he says "let's just see what happens"-🏃 run for the hills. I have two associates that were told this by their men of 4 & 10 years and their still waiting on the proposal after 3 to 5 children. This just breaks my heart. So sad...
Rita Irvin Well the babies 👶 is what happened🤷🏾♀️
Ha! True! I had a guy say “I want to build a friendship first cuz its the right thing to do”. My respnse was great to know cuz I know other men that are interested in more then friends & I needed to know where to focus my energy. I even asked him if he was the minimal possible effort type of guy, you know just sticks around enough so you dont forget him. He said yes. I said see you later and he said “I look forward to getting to know you more”. He wasnt giving up. I told him I dont invest daily interaction with my guy “friends” cuz if your just a friend its for a reason like business. I told him we have no reason to be friends. haha Then I played the song Gone from Montgomery Gentry
Aimee Montgomery I dont date my friends and I let a guy know upfront if he wants a friendship its platonic. So when a guy says that to me its pretty air tight what my inentions will be with a friend.
I've been told this before in the past. My favorite line is, "I don't like to put labels on things", 😂 I have accepted that I will be single for the rest of my life & I will die alone. 😢
Me too missus.
One day that happened to me, i got out of the car after the date and I said; "I dont like my time to be wasted so thank you for everything." It was our 10th date, and he said "nah what happened?" I said; it was nice meeting you this is our last date... lol he said "nah get in the car"... some guys like to play that stupid game to see if you're an easy target or hard to get... I can play that game...guess what happened after that? We got merried😉
The Mora's daily life love this story!!
The Mora's daily life congratulations! You set your standards and either he stepped up or you were stepping on! I wish you every happiness you deserve the very best!
You married him?
You go girl... he knew he had a queen.
Congrats. U got a good man lol
I. fucking . LOVEEEE you for your realness. . like I'm that girl that DOES NOT stick with a man that has mixed signals.. the whole "maybe we'll end up together , you never know" "let's just see how everything goes" ... I see right through ALL that bullshit. I don't entertain it, literally me and my fiancé right now been dating for 4.5 years now and only 2 weeks within talking he ALREADY told me he loves me and he wants to me to be his wife. MY MAN LOCKED ME IN FROM THE JUMP , NO MIXED SIGNALS and I have NEVER EVER felt like I didn't know where he and I were headed, he makes me COMPLETELY comfortable with giving him my ALL, LIFE , DEATH, HAPPINESS, TEARS, THOUGHTS, like I'm LITERALLY unashamed of having sex with him during my period because HE WAS STRAIGHT UP WITH ME FROM THE JUMP. I feel blessed everyday , like I just have so much gratitude to this man. honestly I don't know how women STAY in a "let's see what happens" situation waiting on the man to waste her time. honestly, if a person wants to commit to you and ONLY YOU for the rest of his life, he will do it. no exceptions , no buts. when a man LOOKS at you, talks to you and is invested in exploring your soul ForEvER, he will not be worried about "let's see what happens" , a real commited man says "I know what's gunna happen, ima marry her and make her mine"... the only reason mfs say "let's see what happens" is so they have the open option to leave incase they find "better" ,whether it's a better looking woman, a different personality woman, , it's just another way of them telling you "you're not the one, but you can keep my next woman's seat warm in the meantime".. FOH. WOMEN, STOP HOPING. Let reality SPEAK FOR ITSELF, stop waiting on men who are not decisive About you from the jump.
I completely agree with you. I just went through this about 2 years ago. I knew it wasn't going to last but I tried to hang in there. I take full responsibility for my inability to let go of someone just because I loved him.
Love is NEVER enough.
Lisa Murphy Did he ever get serious with anyone?
Ditto!!! ❤
Last guy told me that and I accepted it only to learn the hard way , a year and a half later, what it really meant. Good guy, life together, but he didn't want to be in a committed relationship. Lesson learned and I'll NEVER accept that as an answer again. #MovingOn
TJ Mc yeah. Same happened to me for a year. But 6 months later I see him with his second new girl on fb and realized he actually could've put more effort in our relationship but never did and I let him. Never going to shut my voice again and please a man to get his love.
Joselyn548, I think because I am divorced and easily walked away from other guys in the past, I was ok with us taking our time. We actually did things like an exclusive couple, discussing future plans, going on trips, meeting friends and family, but then it just seems like he choked and backed off... I didn't ask him because I wanted him to take the lead and ask. I'm going to take my time and enjoy being on my own for awhile, but I really don't think I'll ever ask a guy where our relationship is heading. I'm looking for a man who is going to take the lead and make it known what he wants after a certain time. It's not like I sit back and let the guy control everything. I'm fine with expressing my interest, even initially, but I still think a man should lead.
Ladies, is that a good approach? I've never really been in the dating "game" bc I married kind of young but this ish is crazy. I'm 40 and dealing with men a few years older who still want to be F* Boys or who are just not completely ready to settle down...
I fell for the "let's see what happens", let's just go with the flow", "why do we have to put a label on it" bullshit for 4 yrs. things had seemed to be going so well. Our relationship seemed to be growing and we seemed to be getting closer. I thought we were exclusive, he treated me like a girlfriend and I did "girlfriend" stuff for him. But when I expressed how I felt about him and our relationship and asked him where was this going. He goes off on about how he's not ready for a commitment, how he never said we were in a exclusive relationship, how he's single and we've just been having fun and that he talks to other women and even has had sex with other women, but that I'm number one.... I'm so done withnthe bullshit!
Lisa Jones Wow. I'm sorry you went through that for so long. Good women put up with so much. It's not fair. Hopefully we're all learning from these mistakes and will never repeat them.
Lisa Jones That is bullshit. Sorry that happened to you.
100% agree. No plans, no future and if you get hurt it’s on you because they never made a “commitment”. Biggest cop out for guys.
“No titles... let’s just let this happen organically” watch me organically end up in another mans bed !
😂😂😂😂
I literally had a guy say that exact phrase to me! WTF! Something iis seriously wrong with them!
I swear lol
Tell him Boy bye don't waste my time.
I'm in the process of moving forward with someone else. while "let's see what happens" thinks I'm sitting around waiting
U go guuurrrlll 🙌🙌
Sometimes we ask that question too soon... or he doesn't know how to communicate the "I want to get to know you better and see if we are compatible" idea behind dating. Pull back a little (emotionally) and with your time. Keep your options and hobbies active & develop you!
Men know from the first interaction with you what they could do or be with you. Men are really great observers with a high sense of judgment. They know.
Have some guys friends who told me honestly during discussions that they even know how they'd love to sex a girl whom they're interested in from the very first seconds!
Till these days, I never buy a man "I don't know" anymore. He knows. He just doesn't want you to know what he really thinks. Period.
We are grown. He knows what he wants for his life. It is not about the woman. He knows if he is ready for marriage right now or not. It is that simple.
This happened. Confessed feelings and “let’s just see..” was their response. I let a couple days go by and then sent “This is my last text. Take care.” Glad to see this. It helps confirm my gut feeling.
LOL I'm a female that does that. Here's why: I don't know what to do between two different people. There are pro's and con's to each person but I have feelings for both. So... I use this method to give me time to choose which one is best. People think "If you don't pick me, and only me, you don't really want me". No, that's not the case. There's something about you that I am attracted to and I need to know what it's like to dip my foot in the pool before I jump in. That's what dating is when you meet more than one great person. Everyone is different. Some people love the sideline(s). However in my case, I just don't want to pick the wrong person if I choose one over the other. People put on this facade in the beginning. I'm not interested in that puppy love, rose-colored glasses bullshi*. If I say, "Let's just see what happens" I am biding my time to test you through multiple situations to see how you react or respond. So, this quote that men generally give out is not always a bad thing. But not knowing whether or not they're saying this is because they're testing you or they just want to fuc* you is what kills people the most. I'm honest about what I do and I tell people right off the bat this is how it is because of this and this reason. Most people aren't honest and that's why women are in fear when men say this. The problem is they put all their eggs in one basket. Don't ever wait for one man or woman when dating and unsure of "where it's going". Honestly, if you have to even ask that question you should already know the answer. When people are ready for something serious they'll tell you. Especially men.
I needed this!!! Getting rid of someone who’s not appreciating me ☹️. I deserve love and commitment eventually!
Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and fix some of the foolish decisions I've made or gain my wasted time back.... but applied knowledge is power. Better to know now and apply it than to continue to walk in ignorance.
Thanks so much for this video !
No matter how many times we've been hurt or how many games we've allowed ourselves to play in, a little reminder of the truth never hurts. Thanks so much!!!!! ❤️
You're right, guys always have a plan!! It just may or may not include you!
Sure as can be I've heard it so many times before and thank God for maturity.
I love this. Makes sense. It's always sad when I hear this from men who are 30 and over and supposedly grown
😂
Him: "lets just see what happens."
Me: "just see me walk away."
no time for the bs.
You said it exactly right Derrick, it comes to a point in a woman or man life when we need to grow up and take shit seriously stop wasting other individuals time and your on time. Stop pausing ppl lives with B'S go in truthfully and except what you get back. STOP LYING TO HER/HIM, STOP LEADING A PERSON ON IF YOUR INTENTIONS IS TOTAL OPPOSITE OF THE OTHER PERSON FIND SOMEONE THAT EXCEPT WHAT YOU WANT DON'T LIE.😒 EVERYONE HAVE GOOD ONE!😊
Exit the same way you came in. Lol. I watched this twice.
Thank you for being the bullshit whisperer. I love your videos. It's refreshing for someone to cut through the crap. ❤
Ang ela You are funny😄
U giving up the man code for real. Bravo!! Have you ever heard someone say “I ain’t got no mama, no daddy, no boss, no wife...”? I heard this from someone I dated for 3 years. Shame on me! Treated me well in most areas ... but wasn’t emotionally available and seemed commitment-phobic. Lots of healing needed for us both. Thank you Mr. Jaxn!
I've done this and cut this relationship off. it's stupid to think someone has time for the BS because I don't. I'm mom student and a hundred other rolls and a damn fool isn't one of them.
Lets just see what happens? If you really think about it, what kind of statement is that? Lets just see what happens when I waste my time with absolutely no prospects or foreseeable future with you because I just want to see. I have hear this statement before and I make the same decision every time. I just see what happens a when I don't bother answering his calls, give him the brush off, don't make myself available, and just keep moving forward. I see what happens, they feel some kind of way, try to put a half ass effort into things for the sake of pride, and then once it's bee realized that the bullshit isn't going to fly, they retreat and move onto the next one. I am so blessed that I am not stressed, pressed, or mixed with emotions fear and impatience. My 👑 king is out there and I will claim him all I'm die time. #ideserveit
After I stopped an ex and asked him "how many chances have I given you to get it right, his response was, " a lot but this last chance you didn't really give me a chance"... I'm looking like 😳😳😳 did this ninja really just say that
Danielle Hammond Ninja 😂😂😂Lol
OMG so I'm listening to this video and my son over hears it and mind you he's 8..... He goes ma your friend telling the truth. Nobody gets themselves into anything without a plan or idea and we never run with the idea of let's just see what's happens. I laughed so hard ..... He goes ma I'm always thinking even if I don't say anything. Which hes the kid that's always dropping the I don't know line. 🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️ But ladies this is facts...... Any man that says that to you is just wasting time until he meets his ideal woman. Let that go and do you
I think this only applies if both parties on the same page.. As a woman I've told men let's just see what happens because I don't want to keep rushing into relationships just to get my heart broken again!! And so I say let's just see what happens so I don't put any sure guarantee on you too soon.. Cuz In the process of us getting super serious I might see a major red flag and want to bolt but then it can be too late because both parties feelings are already invested.. See if you dating for months going on a year and you still getting that response then run.. But other than that I think once both parties are on the same level of understanding and they both agree to let's see what happens then I don't see too much of a problem with it.. I wish I said that with some of my past relationships and took it slower 😂
Ur video's really have been helping me a lot with relationships
Janetta Reid same here! his advice definitely helps to process actions and words so help lessen the possibility of a heartache
I find this let's just see what happens idea to be nonsense myself. When someone does not have a plan they leave the other person to have to figure it out for themselves. I myself have seen this happen and believe me it's really hard when you got to say goodbye because there is no plan....there's nothing to look forward to. thanks for sharing
Joli McTerrell 100% true.
This truly spoke to me & I was in the dark about a guy. But I damn sure saw the light after this video! Thank you Derrick!
Straight to the point he isn't ready and dragging you along with his bullshit to keep you around for his benefit.
Well I learnt this lesson thank God..some friends of mine still keep on dating those loosers..they tell me I have to do the same..no thank you! I have better plans for me!!
"Let's just enjoy each other's company." 😒
Yeah... this person doesn't know if they want you. They aren't confident about you as someone they want to be with. It is probably very normal if the relationship is new and you two do not know each other very well... but also it seems like they don't really care where the relationship goes. It's like they don't care about you really. They aren't serious about ANYTHING!
Right but put them in the friendzone and dont give them sex, then all of a sudden it's a problem. 🤦🏽♀️😒 they're nor available anymore lol. Smh the games.
for me it was ''lets enjoy the moment''🙃😂😂😂😂, now it seems very sad and funny
I am much older and wish this guy or anyone would have told me this when I was younger. I will only add men cannot committ until they know who they are and this includes how to provide. Also men when they are ready to marry, shop for a wife. They search for a wife...like a business. If women would treat their realtionships like a business, they would evaluate and cut their loss early...no return..you gotta go. If you are in a business and you do not receive what you bought, do you return....no.
I am on that same level. I am checking ho-facts too. I am checking for character, physical attractiveness, and the ability to protect and provide. If you check those boxes, we can proceed to the dating portion of the event. We get to know each other, see if we have chemistry, see if we should invest our time. Simple. Straight forward.
Angela Toussaint Thank you for this insightful advice. I trying to learn as much as possible
This.
Derrick, I completely agree with you, educate us!!! GOD is using you!! You are a gifted, kind, loving, caring and very intelligent man!!!
I told a guy "Let's just see what happens..." but it was genuine. That's all that I could offer him, we had only been talking for a few days and he was like "What's up ?"...Does that make me a jerk too ?? 😂😂
Francesca Robinson 😄😄😄I would say no not all, your not a jerk for saying that. I said that too to a dude the other day! Sometimes we women have to mirror these men's behavior not only so they can see how it feels but also to protect our hearts cause if we don't they sure as hell wont.
Francesca Robinson, not a jerk but possibly a poor communicator. Did you follow it up with legit, mature reasoning or did you just kill the conversation with "Let's just see what happens"? LJSWH and sub par excuses will make it jerk behavior. If it was genuine and you're just guarding your heart I'm sure you communicated adequately. Sometimes you don't went to say too much to a guy because he'll use it to play you. I believe Derrick is spitting truths from the male playbook. This isn't necessarily directed at female behavior because our playbook is different.
Talking for a "few days" why would you invest yourself in someone so soon? He wanted to claim your panties so badly! I think Derrick meant when 2 people are dating for a while and one keeps dragging the other one around. I know guys who have been in a relationship for over a decade, have 4 kids, and the women have been waiting for him to propose. and after all these years, he's still unsure about his decision, it turns from "let's see what happens to let's leave it like that, we have a good thing going, why mess this up." The men do the deal, the women must be smart enough to close it.
A few days lol
Francesca Robinson. Translation: ' So when
you gonna give me some I want to give it to you bad'.
Dam so true! Went thru the same thing. "Go with the flow" did that.. Walked away after 6 years of BS and no plans. Lesson learned fa' sho' Thank you for your advice. You just dont know how stronger i feel each day learning something new! Thanks for utilizing your gift for something special. Which is, self love and growth! 😘
Lady Boss yep, "go with the flow" is the common anthem nowadays...
Lol! Right. Basically, its go with the bullshit!
Thank you, Derrick! That’s exactly what I told already few guys I met recently, because it is ridiculous to hear such BS from the people in the their early 40s!!!!! Another great reply they give of the same nature is « Well, I don’t know the future! » The problem that they have a nerve to flip it on you and call you drama queen or whatever nonsense explanation they will come to their defense, when their real problem is actually them with their instability and insecurity issues, or simply sometimes they are just playing without even realizing that the time tick tacked their asses to the retirement and they are still single because they are « taking time »! Smh...
"Exit the same Way they came in!!!!Loved it!!!!
This message is the truth! I too am tired of the 'organic' bull shit. Heard that one too many times. A dude once told me when I asked him if we could see each other "Why are you trying to push things, let the universe bring us together?" I said because making plans is what people do. Can we see a movie, go for coffee etc?? What the heck!!!!!
Pahty done!
“Let’s just see what happens!”
Then you say to him: ok, I am out & goodbye. Block him.
All the best with “let’s just see what happens.”
Yes Derrick Yes 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
I was TOLD the very words last night. Thanks for the confirmation of what I FELT after receiving those words. K.
You're right. I'm so tired of feeling like I'm a seat warmer for the real women they want to be with.
Wow! Thanks Derek! You were absolutely right....he looked good on paper, presented himself well.... but this same BS was told to me....by a 48 year-old jerk.... "Let's see what happens"...."Let's take it day by day". Yeah, I'm glad I blocked him... actually I went ghost on him. I didn't lose anything or gave anything away. I happily walked away.🙋
That's just a way 2 waste her time and see if he can find something else b4 trying 2 settle. Keep it moving with that BS.
Watch out for those deceitful men out there that uses that phrase "let just see what happens". The signs are always very clear.
OMG I am dealing with this as we speak. I am making a change with my outlook on men.
Oh my my...Jaxn I'm a victim of that same situation. Thank you for this video...Muah
I love this one: "It's all in God's hands."
This was definitely the confirmation I needed... funny how this popped up in my feed coincidently... 🤭🤭🤭🤭
Amen brotha!!! This is the truth. My friend told me that I ask too many questions....bs. I also asked the million dollar question, What are your intentions as it relates to me? This blew him. He replied and got tongue-tied...lol. However, he can keep it movin.
I got the same response from an ex. Trust me that was a red flag from the jump!! I asked him where did he see himself 5 years from now, we were like 21 and he said he didnt know. i am like man are you serious? I didnt say anything but we were broken up by that time.
He's either PLAYING with you or PLANNING with you.........damn.........this is the best! relationship GUIDANCE ever.....ladies? I didn't learn none of this 'till I found this Channel......oh, yes, this is really, truthfully what we all are dealing with out there!
Sounds like he has different season's spring summer winter fall. He's keeping his options opened who ever he likes the most that's who he's going to choose if a man u been with for awhile can't put a title on what ever you mean to him even if he just see u as a friend he should be man enough to say that. That makes me think that he has season's other options and he's just not sure who he want so he juggles until he drops a ball.
Leopard Leopard lol
Leopard Leopard word
Yup. I can't believe I put up with a jackass like that. Went from someone who said I'd never be shit in life to a guy who appreciates everything about me. Fucking idiot!!!
What he said "when he walked up to you, he had a plan" is so true! If they use this line on you. It means they don't want you to know what that plan is. Not everyone has good intentions with you.
Accountability Amen!
Truth....that's why he's history. We saw what happened! No time for *BULL*
This is exactly what I needed to hear ... THANK U💯👌🏾
Heard it too many times an it was a waste of my time ,and put alot of heartache in my heart ..now I spot it head on....not today sir ,not today !!!
“Helll No”😂😂fr!the”let’s go with the flow”is the same vibe well even the flow have a destination!