Watching these videos scares me sometimes because I realize how emotionally scarred I am. It’s overwhelming, I feel like I don’t even know where to start to even try to fix myself because there’s so many issues.
I hear you, I feel exactly the same. Totally overwhelming and exhausting. Keep going, keep watching stuff, reading stuff and slowly healing. I do have hope it will get easier in time.
From my own experience, I'd suggest you do one small thing. Meditate each morning for FIVE MINUTES. Or work out for FIVE MINUTES every morning. Or drink one more glass of water per day. Or start getting the amount of sleep you need. Or concentrate on how you FEEL after you've had an interaction with a friend or family member and if you don't feel good, try to consciously limit your exposure to that person. (If it's a toxic nonrelative that you can cut off, cut 'em off). If you do one of these things, you may be surprised to see how good it feels to take control of your life rather than go wherever the wind blows you.
@@susie5254 I drink tons of water, I work out 5 days a week. I get 8 hours of sleep at night. I do a lot of healthy things for myself. I just need plain old therapy lol….so I watch self help videos to try to replace it or at least recognize the areas I have trouble with. I don’t have to deal with the person that caused most of my issues so that’s a blessing. But the damage is done. I have a great life and cannot complain! But again, this is one area that I just need to fix but don’t know where to start. Thank you for caring enough to comment though. I appreciate it.
@@stayce751 yes, sometimes therapy is necessary. Unfortunately it can be so difficult to find someone helpful. I wish you success and I'm so happy you take care of yourself properly 😊
You are so GOOOD! I'm a new Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner & I learn so much from you. I work in Child & Adolescent Psychiatry where nearly 100% of my clients are trauma patients, from dysfunctional families/backgrounds. For myself, this video revealed that my struggles are mostly: "fear of success", "overwhelmed responsibilities" & "emotional discomfort." I was a parentified child to my mother & most of my nieces & nephews. More of the parent to everyone, but didn't received parenting. So that's A LOT of stress! So I can clearly see why I struggle with these. My greatest struggle at the moment is "self-care in the form of eating healthy & exercising." I have to lose weight, but continue to sabotage!
It’s amazing that you’re continuing your education on your own because that’s gonna separate you from all the other nurses and psychiatrists. When I was growing up I would always go to the wrong people for help not realizing that they had no idea what I was actually dealing with they would give me medication’s I never needed I went through that for years they misdiagnosed me. It was very difficult dealing with therapist and doctors that don’t know much about this particular niche because it really is a niche and most people that we go to for help just further traumatize us.
@@PersianDollTarot Hi! I'm sorry that you have been harmed by those meant to help you with your mental & emotional health. I do agree, it's very hard to find good providers. What I've notice is that a lot of people enter this field for money or to help, but they may fall short if they have yet to start doing their own inner work. The further traumatization of patients, I believe come from the lack of insight & internal health on the providers part. We must consistently grow, evaluate & educate ourselves when working with vulnerable persons.
Praying for your situation. You're doing the best thing in getting your eyes on the needs of others, and in doing so getting your eyes off your personal issues. God will bless you for that. This is the very reason Jesus died on the cross, so that we can ask for His help. Pure and simple. Hold strong
Greatful for you! Truely fills my heart and tickles my soul that what you are learning is making its way into our current humanitarian/health systems. True empathy comes from healing ones self allowing us to help others from our hearts to free our souls together. Best to you being and helping others more then you ever imagined! Priceless gift to human life you are!
I'm grateful for your videos. It helps a lot. I sabotage myself since the beginning of this life. Complex trauma environnement feeling like a piece of shit, just here to support my parents, to represent everything wrongs in their life. So I did pathetic job and now I'm sick and I have to find something better and I dont know how. Worst feeling ever to feel and be alone emotionnaly. By now, I just feel hopeless. I still continue my healing journey. Much love everyone
my guilt comes from my deaf parents making me feel guilty for hearing and not having the same disability - yeah, that's actually a thing thank you for your work 🙏
I’m so glad I came across this content!! I finally feel like I have a true window into my lifelong struggles. Years of therapy have not taught me anything nearly as useful as this content right here. Thank you thank you thank you!
growing up in a strictly religious household is so true. fun felt like i was doing something bad, always. this has totally warped my understanding of God .
I’m beginning to recognize a lot of the things you’re mentioning but it seems like I might have become damaged or injured along the way, so now, I forget.. start over.. forget.. start over, on and on. I’m a ‘premie’ so that might have something to do with it? However, I’m recognizing these things so that now I can start confronting them. Okay, say a prayer for me and thank you for your thoughts.
My soon to be ex husband looked at me year before last when we were at our happiest and most peaceful and said “this is the first relationship I have ever been so peaceful in my life… I like it but I feel bored!” … little did I know that within 6 months of saying that to me he would be openly cheating and calling it polyarmory with his drug dealing mistress. So here we are! Now he says we just don’t jive and we are no longer a match. He doesn’t know what happened (totally ignoring the year of hurtful and disrespectful behavior).
I'm 63 years old and I'm glad that finally there is someone that knows how I feel and why I am this way I was raised with a dad that was abusive in every way possible and you name it I was abused and my mom let him just as long that he doesn't kill me and my brother and at 16 I meet Steve and he was married with 2 baby girl and a wife will he left his family to be with me and for 14 years he did the same thing my dad did abuse me in every way he could do I grow up thinking that was love they used the word love to make me give him what he wants and that was another girl or woman so I'd make friends with her and he would have sex with her and he made me watch and it hurt me and punched me after he was done with her I can't stay in a relationship because I don't trust Man and I have a low self esteem
When I was 6,I was at my my step dad's work and he wrote something on the computer for me to see, it said "my name is no good, chop him up for firewood". I was just in shock that someone could be so mean for no reason.
This is why you want to know the family of your future husband and how the household was when they were growing up. Because you can almost see it coming over the horizon if you are looking and paying attention.
As an Asian this is normal. Everyday is survival or lese you are considered bad Genes and are kicked out of the house. Everyday is lying to stay alive and constant will to go through another abuse, another set of threats.
I'd like to know more about S&m... How trauma factors are at play flagellation wise and with sub and Dom elements....(Just asking for a friend....who am I kidding, I don't have any friends)
@jamesdiamond2302 it's a very positive message I wish I would have learned earlier in life ....currently it means so much to me 1 we don't have to live in deferred hope 2 we can make our dreams come true and be fulfilled 3 if we pay attention to the people places and things that deferred hope we can gaurd our hearts we can pivot out of a sick heart and by giving it to God he truly loves to see our dreams fulfilled we just need to be autonomous and authentic to get out of constantly having our hopes deferred and our hearts sick .
@@justinheer9098 thanks so much for your reply kind Sir. I'm not a very cerebral person because of the drugs and booze if consumed I now have a brain injury. Could you spell it out a little easier sir? Ps, wouldn't it be wiser to ask for God's dreams for us to come true rather than ours? Considering he knows us better than we know ourselves?
Watching these videos scares me sometimes because I realize how emotionally scarred I am. It’s overwhelming, I feel like I don’t even know where to start to even try to fix myself because there’s so many issues.
I hear you, I feel exactly the same. Totally overwhelming and exhausting. Keep going, keep watching stuff, reading stuff and slowly healing. I do have hope it will get easier in time.
@@hcf555 thanks for your encouragement.
Much appreciated.
From my own experience, I'd suggest you do one small thing. Meditate each morning for FIVE MINUTES. Or work out for FIVE MINUTES every morning. Or drink one more glass of water per day. Or start getting the amount of sleep you need. Or concentrate on how you FEEL after you've had an interaction with a friend or family member and if you don't feel good, try to consciously limit your exposure to that person. (If it's a toxic nonrelative that you can cut off, cut 'em off). If you do one of these things, you may be surprised to see how good it feels to take control of your life rather than go wherever the wind blows you.
@@susie5254 I drink tons of water, I work out 5 days a week. I get 8 hours of sleep at night. I do a lot of healthy things for myself. I just need plain old therapy lol….so I watch self help videos to try to replace it or at least recognize the areas I have trouble with. I don’t have to deal with the person that caused most of my issues so that’s a blessing. But the damage is done. I have a great life and cannot complain! But again, this is one area that I just need to fix but don’t know where to start.
Thank you for caring enough to comment though. I appreciate it.
@@stayce751 yes, sometimes therapy is necessary. Unfortunately it can be so difficult to find someone helpful. I wish you success and I'm so happy you take care of yourself properly 😊
control is a HUGE one. emotional discomfort too, and catastrophic thinking but i feel like its connected to control
You are so GOOOD! I'm a new Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner & I learn so much from you. I work in Child & Adolescent Psychiatry where nearly 100% of my clients are trauma patients, from dysfunctional families/backgrounds. For myself, this video revealed that my struggles are mostly: "fear of success", "overwhelmed responsibilities" & "emotional discomfort." I was a parentified child to my mother & most of my nieces & nephews. More of the parent to everyone, but didn't received parenting. So that's A LOT of stress! So I can clearly see why I struggle with these. My greatest struggle at the moment is "self-care in the form of eating healthy & exercising." I have to lose weight, but continue to sabotage!
It’s amazing that you’re continuing your education on your own because that’s gonna separate you from all the other nurses and psychiatrists. When I was growing up I would always go to the wrong people for help not realizing that they had no idea what I was actually dealing with they would give me medication’s I never needed I went through that for years they misdiagnosed me. It was very difficult dealing with therapist and doctors that don’t know much about this particular niche because it really is a niche and most people that we go to for help just further traumatize us.
@@PersianDollTarot Hi! I'm sorry that you have been harmed by those meant to help you with your mental & emotional health. I do agree, it's very hard to find good providers. What I've notice is that a lot of people enter this field for money or to help, but they may fall short if they have yet to start doing their own inner work. The further traumatization of patients, I believe come from the lack of insight & internal health on the providers part. We must consistently grow, evaluate & educate ourselves when working with vulnerable persons.
@@Trista1983Thank you, and very much agree with you.
Praying for your situation. You're doing the best thing in getting your eyes on the needs of others, and in doing so getting your eyes off your personal issues. God will bless you for that. This is the very reason Jesus died on the cross, so that we can ask for His help. Pure and simple. Hold strong
Greatful for you! Truely fills my heart and tickles my soul that what you are learning is making its way into our current humanitarian/health systems. True empathy comes from healing ones self allowing us to help others from our hearts to free our souls together. Best to you being and helping others more then you ever imagined! Priceless gift to human life you are!
Another pain-buster… you are the Tylenol of the cosmos, Mr Fletcher. Thank you so much. 🙏
I'm grateful for your videos. It helps a lot. I sabotage myself since the beginning of this life. Complex trauma environnement feeling like a piece of shit, just here to support my parents, to represent everything wrongs in their life. So I did pathetic job and now I'm sick and I have to find something better and I dont know how. Worst feeling ever to feel and be alone emotionnaly. By now, I just feel hopeless. I still continue my healing journey. Much love everyone
You are an incredible soul, I believe in you and the strengh you have to continue your journey... sending you love, courage and peace.
Much love ❤❤❤
@@iammeaning thank you so much for your message. It's very kind and generous of you. I wish you the best 🙏❤️
my guilt comes from my deaf parents making me feel guilty for hearing and not having the same disability - yeah, that's actually a thing
thank you for your work 🙏
I’m so glad I came across this content!! I finally feel like I have a true window into my lifelong struggles. Years of therapy have not taught me anything nearly as useful as this content right here. Thank you thank you thank you!
9:24 nothing can hurt us more than our own thoughts unguarded
growing up in a strictly religious household is so true. fun felt like i was doing something bad, always. this has totally warped my understanding of God .
Thank you. This fits right in with my CPTSD
OMG…it’s like a mirror to my childhood…I always said with my brothers, it was chaos…and yes, I’ve been a chaos junkie for years.
I’m beginning to recognize a lot of the things you’re mentioning but it seems like I might have become damaged or injured along the way, so now, I forget.. start over.. forget.. start over, on and on. I’m a ‘premie’ so that might have something to do with it? However, I’m recognizing these things so that now I can start confronting them. Okay, say a prayer for me and thank you for your thoughts.
Great content….,thank you🙏
There's also a perverse pride in the ability to withstand pain.
Absolutely brilliant.
You are amazing, thank you for what you do! Reading me like a book.
My soon to be ex husband looked at me year before last when we were at our happiest and most peaceful and said “this is the first relationship I have ever been so peaceful in my life… I like it but I feel bored!” … little did I know that within 6 months of saying that to me he would be openly cheating and calling it polyarmory with his drug dealing mistress. So here we are! Now he says we just don’t jive and we are no longer a match. He doesn’t know what happened (totally ignoring the year of hurtful and disrespectful behavior).
I’m so sorry he did that to you! 😢
I'm 63 years old and I'm glad that finally there is someone that knows how I feel and why I am this way I was raised with a dad that was abusive in every way possible and you name it I was abused and my mom let him just as long that he doesn't kill me and my brother and at 16 I meet Steve and he was married with 2 baby girl and a wife will he left his family to be with me and for 14 years he did the same thing my dad did abuse me in every way he could do I grow up thinking that was love they used the word love to make me give him what he wants and that was another girl or woman so I'd make friends with her and he would have sex with her and he made me watch and it hurt me and punched me after he was done with her I can't stay in a relationship because I don't trust Man and I have a low self esteem
When I was 6,I was at my my step dad's work and he wrote something on the computer for me to see, it said "my name is no good, chop him up for firewood". I was just in shock that someone could be so mean for no reason.
Thank u for this video.. ❤
This is why you want to know the family of your future husband and how the household was when they were growing up. Because you can almost see it coming over the horizon if you are looking and paying attention.
Wonderful video Sir, Thank you for this knowledgeable video 😊
Wow so good
You are a lifesaver❤
incredible vid thanks!
As an Asian this is normal.
Everyday is survival or lese you are considered bad Genes and are kicked out of the house.
Everyday is lying to stay alive and constant will to go through another abuse, another set of threats.
Great explanation! As always ❤️
You are so close. About 94% accurate.
Thanks for sharing 😊💜🙏🪷
This video was really insightful into understanding problems. Now, where are the solutions?
Go to his channel and click on the “live” tab - there you will hear the longer lectures. This video was just a snippet of one of the longer lectures
You have to adopt strategies that people who don’t have CPTSD use. Make the same decisions they make. And do the same behaviors.
@@psycherevival2762 he is upselling for private counseling clients. That’s why there are no solutions
Yaaa
I'd like to know more about S&m... How trauma factors are at play flagellation wise and with sub and Dom elements....(Just asking for a friend....who am I kidding, I don't have any friends)
Wow!!!!
How brave are you for speaking up???
What a lion you are!!!!
Much love and respect from Australia mate 🤠💎
A hope deferred makes the heart sick
King Solomon right?
What does it truly means?
@jamesdiamond2302 it's a very positive message I wish I would have learned earlier in life ....currently it means so much to me 1 we don't have to live in deferred hope 2 we can make our dreams come true and be fulfilled 3 if we pay attention to the people places and things that deferred hope we can gaurd our hearts we can pivot out of a sick heart and by giving it to God he truly loves to see our dreams fulfilled we just need to be autonomous and authentic to get out of constantly having our hopes deferred and our hearts sick .
@@justinheer9098 thanks so much for your reply kind Sir. I'm not a very cerebral person because of the drugs and booze if consumed I now have a brain injury.
Could you spell it out a little easier sir?
Ps, wouldn't it be wiser to ask for God's dreams for us to come true rather than ours?
Considering he knows us better than we know ourselves?
I have 15 of these! Ugh 😩
Are the slides available for download?
Grazie.
9:02 wow
How can I seek counsel for are your most recent videos? Please.
Interesting, 😮used to back and forth on my wrist with a steak knife till oozing raw😢,then pus came what a mess
Why does a woman stay with an angry man 40 yrs
What a gallery of horror for this children...
I "applied" most of those to my time at university. Guess who was a big big big failure and embarrassment heh...
Let's get it over with lol
Yeah
How do we stop though
8:53
Does this guy ever get to solutions? I know I have a shit Childhood, How do I solve it?
Oh brother… am I a masochist or what? 😂
❤❤
🎤
Here we are. Maybe i'll find happiness again maybe the world coud heal.
All is ecology.
Gonzalez Mary Robinson Helen Martin Dorothy
So basically, everything about being human makes a human being sabotage being a human? Interesting
You got that wrong. Not human nature, the way we are raised by neglectful baby boomers.