12 traits emotionally intelligent people share (You can learn them) | Daniel Goleman for Big Think+

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  • Опубліковано 20 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 780

  • @LouisDillard02
    @LouisDillard02 4 місяці тому +814

    One thing I've consistently noticed is that emotionally intelligent people inspire and motivate others, often leading by example. They are also driven by intrinsic goals and have a strong sense of purpose.

    • @DigiNudge
      @DigiNudge 4 місяці тому +17

      Totally agree. They are people you would want to be around.

    • @darkcreatureinadarkroom1617
      @darkcreatureinadarkroom1617 3 місяці тому +2

      Makes complete sense. Intrinsic goals will forever be much more motivating than extrinsic rewards towards creating the structures that you need for the life that you want. And that is inspiring! Thank you for sharing, it gives me a lot to think about.

    • @humanbeing3337
      @humanbeing3337 3 місяці тому +3

      …and those without do the exact opposite

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      This is the dumbest thing in the world. Being Emotional Intelligent is not a thing. You are talking ab out someone that loves their job

    • @charlottemichelle8619
      @charlottemichelle8619 3 місяці тому

      @@user-nc9pc3gr4c bro did not watch the video

  • @afiqraof5801
    @afiqraof5801 3 місяці тому +398

    “You don’t put emotions together with intelligence. But actually, it’s being intelligent about emotions.”

    • @MK-cc5ve
      @MK-cc5ve 3 місяці тому +5

      It’s interesting, emotions then intelligence v. Intelligence then emotions. Which to me is still putting the two together.

    • @darkcreatureinadarkroom1617
      @darkcreatureinadarkroom1617 3 місяці тому +4

      ​@@MK-cc5veI personally believe learning about logical fallacies and cognitive biases is a key cornerstone for the development of emotional intelligence. It may sound wild, but it's really about learning to recognize when you (or others) are getting carried away by your most "instinctual" parts of your brain; and what might be the reason for that, what to do about it, and how to course correct if necessary. Right then and there you are working on at least two of the pillars of emotional intelligence which were talked about in the video: self-awareness and relationship management.

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      And it is actually useless.

    • @ryantrimble356
      @ryantrimble356 3 місяці тому +1

      So it's still intelligence that matters.

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      @@ryantrimble356 If you are implying that this is BS and only IQ matters, then you are correct sir.

  • @asfeastasteaw
    @asfeastasteaw 4 місяці тому +627

    Self Awareness
    1)Emotional Self Awareness
    Social Awareness
    2)Empathy
    3)Organizational Awareness
    Self Management
    4)Emotional Self Control
    5)Adaptability
    6)Achievement Orientation
    7)Positive Outlook
    Relationship Management
    8)Influence
    9)Coach & Mentor
    10)Conflict Management
    11)Teamwork
    12)Inspirational Leadership

    • @tee4468
      @tee4468 4 місяці тому +2

      Thank you!

    • @burnyizland
      @burnyizland 4 місяці тому

      @user-vc1vt5ot1e This person just regurgitated the slide they showed, word for word. If you were paying attention you could have read it yourself.

    • @aritramukherjee
      @aritramukherjee 4 місяці тому +48

      You have shown emotional intelligence by helping viewers of this note.

    • @firebal97
      @firebal97 3 місяці тому +3

      Ty ❤

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      You are soooooo brainwashed

  • @rachellepennington6596
    @rachellepennington6596 4 місяці тому +224

    I listened to this on my way to work (as a parole officer). Over the years, I’ve had many people tell me how much I helped them, and I would think to myself, “I really didn’t do anything. I just listened.” This video showed me why. It’s incredible how much being heard means to people and how it can impact their performance in work, life, or even on parole supervision.

    • @4ncrblz
      @4ncrblz 4 місяці тому +15

      In college a roommate of mine sat down with me at our kitchen table and started talking about some things that were troubling them. 20 minutes later, I had pretty much only said a few "active listening" sounds, and they thanked me profusely and told me how very helpful I had been. That experience at the beginning of my adulthood stuck with me. Often, people just need to be listened to!

    • @beverleyabrown488
      @beverleyabrown488 3 місяці тому +3

      Most people try to empathise by talking about a similar experience. When people need help, they want to talk about themselves, not listen to you talking about you. You did the right thing by truly listening.

  • @user-lv9go4by8s
    @user-lv9go4by8s 4 місяці тому +685

    I once taught an EQ class to thousands of people for a major international bank and what I learned was it's certainly teachable but cognitive empathy is a weapon for the people who need to "learn it". Its not an idea its a way of living, thinking and Interacting with Oneself!! The rest of the world observes that interaction as your personality, demeanor and temperament.

    • @lkae4
      @lkae4 4 місяці тому +4

      Empathy is a weapon? How so?

    • @user-lv9go4by8s
      @user-lv9go4by8s 4 місяці тому

      @@lkae4 because they learn to manipulate the world. Think wolf in sheeps clothes.

    • @user-lv9go4by8s
      @user-lv9go4by8s 4 місяці тому +31

      ​@@lkae4wolf in sheeps clothing 👻

    • @Alritealritealrite
      @Alritealritealrite 4 місяці тому +50

      ​@@lkae4fake empathy is a weapon.

    • @lkae4
      @lkae4 4 місяці тому +1

      @@Alritealritealrite Thank you. How do we determine when empathy is fake or real?

  • @l0bsterk1ng
    @l0bsterk1ng 4 місяці тому +149

    I'm happy you made the point about how changing habits are uncomfortable. Lately, I've been trying to listen to people more and it makes me a little uneasy. It's reassuring knowing I'm on the right path to bettering myself.

    • @emilyo.766
      @emilyo.766 4 місяці тому +11

      Willingness to change is one of the greatest and hardest things to achieve, to even try. And we don't change only for the sake of others but also for the sake of our own quality of life. I'm genuinely happy for you! ❤

    • @BrownWilliams-g6v
      @BrownWilliams-g6v 7 днів тому

      *Psychedelic definitely have undeniable benefits to deal with PTSD,ADDICTION,TRAUMA AND DEPRESSION ETC.The experience gave me freedom.I was Able to get shrooms,dmt,edibles,lsd etc from this licensed mycologist who ships to my location without hassel*

    • @BrownWilliams-g6v
      @BrownWilliams-g6v 7 днів тому

      *they're on telegram as*

    • @BrownWilliams-g6v
      @BrownWilliams-g6v 7 днів тому

      @ *FURRYTRIPS*

  • @nitsugaordnajela
    @nitsugaordnajela 4 місяці тому +727

    HOW TO IMPROVE OUR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE should be mandatory in early education

    • @Msal19
      @Msal19 4 місяці тому

      True. Unfortunately governments don’t want us to be very intelligent so we’re manipulated much easier.

    • @alandunlap4106
      @alandunlap4106 4 місяці тому +6

      Great idea! Maybe life would give a few less hard knocks.

    • @thewb8329
      @thewb8329 4 місяці тому +23

      The educational system never teaches practical and necessary life skills.

    • @alandunlap4106
      @alandunlap4106 4 місяці тому +1

      @@thewb8329 Well, not during these dark times. :-P

    • @horrudu4081
      @horrudu4081 4 місяці тому +9

      I work with these things as an swedish after-school-activity-center teacher ("Fritidshem", which is a part of the swedish educational system). In my teachers degree, this and informal learning was my major, when the other teachers where studing math or language or whatever.
      Our form of education is not manditory for the kids to attend, but the aaabsolute majority of our kids also stay for this too.

  • @mathewwright4129
    @mathewwright4129 4 місяці тому +502

    Learning about the bus driver was inspiring.

    • @julianalcantar8776
      @julianalcantar8776 4 місяці тому +19

      There is a book out there called The Energy Bus! I definitely recommend it.. it’s an easy read too

    • @user-vv7rt1pq3v
      @user-vv7rt1pq3v 4 місяці тому

      ..well he is not just an ordinary bus driver but an ev-@ngel one

    • @jeetendrakumarpanda5306
      @jeetendrakumarpanda5306 4 місяці тому +9

      He also mentioned about this incident in his book “Emotional intelligence “

    • @marie_es
      @marie_es 4 місяці тому +2

      What a gem, he knew what the world needed. Heartwarming ❤

    • @Iliekmelonz
      @Iliekmelonz 3 місяці тому

      @@julianalcantar8776ooo I’ll look into it, even though the story he said was short, I also want to be like the bus driver, super inspiring and motivating to remain empathetic and positive despite the negativity surrounding you ☺️

  • @GeorgeBurdell-f4m
    @GeorgeBurdell-f4m 4 місяці тому +119

    As a 50-year Nuclear Physicist, I can empirically verify that this author is right on target. I have also learned that Emotional Intelligence can be taught. Each summer I volunteer to teach in a program designed for "disadvantaged" students. That class has been able to teach the students what many other students' learn at home. The students have been tracked for several years, and have proved that learning Emotional Intelligence can jump start their careers and has a lasting effect.

  • @glenbateman5960
    @glenbateman5960 3 місяці тому +19

    Emotionally intelligent people tend to be active rather than reactive.
    They think before they speak. They think before they act.
    They learn to identify when they are not in a productive frame of mind, and they tend to avoid making big, life-changing decisions when their head "isn't in the right place."

  • @TorgerVedeler
    @TorgerVedeler 4 місяці тому +285

    I once worked for a guy who was wild, foul-mouthed, and who had what today we would call extremely high emotional intelligence. Our customers loved him. The employees loved him. He saved my life and taught me to be the best person I could be, and I will forever be grateful to him.

    • @shrugalborkar5308
      @shrugalborkar5308 4 місяці тому +26

      Wait how was he high on eq if he was wild and foul-mouthed?

    • @nurjafri
      @nurjafri 4 місяці тому

      ​@@shrugalborkar5308delivery, people become addicted to how hillarious can foul mouthed be. Nd its mostly not to belittle someone but how stupid of a situation person is in nd baggage people carry.
      Example: Fuck u man for not caring about urself, kudos.

    • @BeyondtheMatrix2030
      @BeyondtheMatrix2030 4 місяці тому +45

      @@shrugalborkar5308I guess they’re trying to say that despite the guy being foul-mouthed he would score high on EI.

    • @user-vv7rt1pq3v
      @user-vv7rt1pq3v 4 місяці тому

      ahhh.. a special forces guy on- leave trying to make some extras

    • @thuylamnguyenphan2260
      @thuylamnguyenphan2260 4 місяці тому +2

      why he's called high emotional intelligence when he was wild and foul-mouthed?

  • @SuperTruffels
    @SuperTruffels 4 місяці тому +13

    Notes:
    EQ-
    Self aware
    Manage emotions
    Empathy
    Self aware
    Know your emotions
    Self management :~
    Can you manage big emotions to do what you have to right now
    Social awareness:~
    Practice empathy
    Relationship management:~
    Trust
    Communication
    Conflict management
    Poor listening:~
    Cutting ppl off- 1) listen 2) say what i think they mean 3)say what I think
    Practice good listening and you will get better
    Positive leader increase productivity

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      You do realize how brainwashed you sound? You are the 15th person to have the same exact post.

  • @MotocrossElf
    @MotocrossElf 4 місяці тому +66

    The missing piece of this is how to understand and heal our emotional trauma and hold space for others in the trauma healing process. The greatest barrier to developing emotional intelligence is the trauma, most of it from childhood, that gets in the way of effective emotional awareness and management skills. Because we've had many generations of living in societies with poor emotional intelligence, nearly everybody is carrying around attachment trauma and trauma from various abuses, neglects, and oversights of our parenting and enculturation. Until someone can learn to hold and heal that trauma, it's going to be very difficult for them to practice emotional intelligence skills.

    • @gracegeyer6062
      @gracegeyer6062 4 місяці тому +7

      perhaps, but also developing emotional intelligence is a means of coping with a difficult life event

    • @vismayagowda8780
      @vismayagowda8780 4 місяці тому +4

      Very well said. It's so true

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      Oh god, you got to be kidding me. You sound like an idiot

  • @betterchapter
    @betterchapter 4 місяці тому +74

    There is perhaps no psychological skill more fundamental than resisting impulse.

  • @tofucreamcheesebagel
    @tofucreamcheesebagel 3 місяці тому +12

    the bus driver story made me cry, that was the kindest thing ever

  • @tengotnco5942
    @tengotnco5942 4 місяці тому +14

    A sign of a true leader is caring ❤

  • @matthair8324
    @matthair8324 4 місяці тому +69

    And this is how my interpersonal problems always begin.
    If YOU are considering an others emotions, then you WILL assume that another is considering YOUR emotions.
    Frankly, it's taken me years to determine just how niave this thought pattern is.
    I grew up with some belief that minds are similar, observing the same conditions, following the same criteria.
    No.
    If you are empathic, disregard your expectations.
    People that need help don't want it.
    People that have bad ideas won't consider another.
    People who fail blame others.
    If you have empathy, save it for good people.
    That's very damned few.

    • @judithnelson27
      @judithnelson27 4 місяці тому

      Thank you. I needed your insight into this issue.

    • @rongike
      @rongike 4 місяці тому +21

      don't let this traumatized society ruin you tho, have better boundaries, yes, but don't become malignant yourself.

  • @berlynhale2962
    @berlynhale2962 3 місяці тому +51

    My last boss rubbed me the wrong way from the start . She would ask “how is [my name] doing today?” I don’t know why you would say it like that . And of course I knew my response didn’t matter to her because she would keep walking or immediately start talking to someone else . When she called me after receiving my resignation letter where I put the details of why I was leaving all she could say was “I’m sorry you feel that way”. For me it’s about feeling seen, appreciated, recognized for good work and just making a person feel good about themselves. Even though I’m reserved and introverted it all seems so natural to me . I want others to feel good and worthy and important because they are

    • @itoibo4208
      @itoibo4208 3 місяці тому

      leaders are often greedy and stupid. Hardly emotionally intelligent, but they do know how to play the game of being fake.

    • @NokiaTablet-pl7vt
      @NokiaTablet-pl7vt 2 місяці тому +4

      How is Berlyn doing today?

    • @gladisgracechellaiah5079
      @gladisgracechellaiah5079 15 днів тому +1

      Am sorry you had to go through that! I hope you are well ❤

  • @StrategicThinking4Leaders
    @StrategicThinking4Leaders Місяць тому +5

    Emotional intelligence is the key not only to personal development but also to building quality relationships!
    Self-awareness is the first step to understanding oneself.
    Empathy helps us connect with others on a deeper level.
    Emotional self-control and adaptability are essential in a rapidly changing environment.

  • @wooziiiii5001
    @wooziiiii5001 4 місяці тому +24

    Thats true. Your IQ may qualify you for the job but your EQ will get you to the door. Always be kind and you'll never know how far it can go. I got interviewed for a job bec of a referral from a old collegue. I know deep in my heart that I wouldnt be even get that chance of an interview if I wasnt being referred bec of too many candidates. I believed that if you are always kind and diligent at your work, even though you dont ask it, people will happily refer you or still want to work with you in the future ❤

  • @RichardAmesMusic
    @RichardAmesMusic 4 місяці тому +171

    I have not seen a correlation between who is "emotionally intelligent" and who is successful. I know more successful jerks than successful nice people. And I have several decades of experience in both large and small organizations across government, academia and private industry. After reading a couple of Goleman’s books I was always hoping someone could explain to me why my reality is so different.

    • @nataliaalfonso2662
      @nataliaalfonso2662 4 місяці тому +44

      Because you’re right lol.

    • @波紋小石
      @波紋小石 4 місяці тому

      One way to think of it: organizations play different games. If the game is dodgeball, that's going to reward different people than an organization that plays poker or darts, or one that bobsleds. The games they play, for enduring organizations, may fit their clients, investors, and workers. For example, Boeing seems to have started with games like bobsledding and darts, working together and trying to engineer the highest quality products for discerning clients. But a merger with a problematic firm changed the most rewarding games to dodgeball and poker, attacking others' strengths and hiding weaknesses to win despite underinvestment.
      Of course, players can get confused about what game they're playing. It seems, Boeing employees were playing poker with regulators and clients, trying to win permits and contracts despite consistently weak hands. Regulators, clients, and investors, however, thought Boeing was still quality oriented, and thought they were bobsledding together, so they didn't scrutinize Boeing enough. Unfortunately, that has led to a long series of tragic accidents for the public.
      You might think, "well, those Boeing people must completely lack emotional intelligence, what a bunch of successful jerks." While there seem to be a fair number of them in upper management, there've also been whistleblowers and loyal engineers trying to improve operations from the inside. Some in management might also be compartmental enough to treat workers well while deceiving regulators, investors, and clients. Sadly, emotional intelligence could help them do that well. Like lots of skills, emotional intelligence can also advantage manipulative behavior.
      With that perspective, you might think, "my jobs sucked, they just rewarded jerks." Or, "was that nice person I knew really nice, had ulterior motives, our interests happened to align, or just liked working with me?" Maybe all of those were true. It's possible to be acting strategically and genuinely treat others well for the sake of others or on principle. People can be complex. But if your workplaces seemed to lack nice people, it doesn't sound like they were good places for you to work, not because there's anything lacking about you, but because they didn't find making those workplaces feel better worth the investment.

    • @MrRtodd23
      @MrRtodd23 4 місяці тому +54

      There isn't a correlation between intelligence and success either.

    • @Marc-io8qm
      @Marc-io8qm 4 місяці тому +1

      Agree. The issue which is missed is group selection. If you follow his precepts and you’re surrounded by people who are receptive (and not deceptive) then it works. Unfortunately society is enduring massive malware via multiculturalism and Diversity. Corporations are actively creating friction thinking they are morally justified to enforce a mix of people. We are designed to be with people similar to us - not different. It’s a bitter pill to swallow.

    • @hollyandstelladoodle8748
      @hollyandstelladoodle8748 4 місяці тому +13

      Agreed.
      Perhaps he should have used the word “liked” or the phrase “who build successful relationships”.

  • @actionclanton
    @actionclanton 4 місяці тому +2

    emotionally intelligent leaders: for college students, was a great book a friend recommended to me at my first job and i will be forever grateful

  • @lppoqql
    @lppoqql 4 місяці тому +43

    I think the first part of his statement is true, once you land in your high IQ profession often people with high EQ will likely standout more. But this doesn't mean people with low IQ but high EQ will be more successful than people with high IQ but low EQ. Its very situational.

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      Not it is not. High IQ is proven in outcomes. EQ has no correlation. It is part of the woke brainwashing scheme for dumb people

  • @StMikaila
    @StMikaila 3 місяці тому +6

    Raise your EQ
    My life : my husband left me to marry another woman and take everything i had when i need someone i can trust and happy with in my lower
    What a life.

    • @alxuria
      @alxuria Місяць тому +1

      I hope you are to be in a better situation now or in the near future :)

  • @vivekjaiswar417
    @vivekjaiswar417 4 місяці тому +2

    I thought this video would be about how to calm your mind in complex situations and how to get rid of it , but it turned to be a good man with a lot of achievements and experience which made this video more attractive and more powerful. That old man doesn't even care about being a number 1 bookseller , this shows how good people can be when it comes straight from the heart and with no pretendness

  • @NathanHarrison7
    @NathanHarrison7 4 місяці тому +34

    Well said sir! This was introduced into our very large corporate environment 15 years ago. Was transformative for our management team and hence company. And I agree completely… It absolutely should be part of the education system. Starting with young children and even in College. The result would be, as you stated, better relationships, leading to a better world.

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      You are one of those idiots that were brainwashed by your corporations? ugh, people are so easily brainwashed

  • @Peace10184
    @Peace10184 4 місяці тому +16

    Every human being should start studying and getting to know themselves ( weaknesses and qualities) that will help you manage your emotions moreover our thoughts are very powerful we should program them and we should calm ourselves in stressful situations, that will enable us to understand people around us very well, we start with ourselves we should solve our own problems and be very responsible for our own decisions.

    • @Aronnax777
      @Aronnax777 4 місяці тому

      Meditation

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      I think you should just mind your own business as to what others should do.

    • @Aronnax777
      @Aronnax777 2 місяці тому

      @@user-nc9pc3gr4c I think others have a right to know what options are available for self improvement, but I agree that it should be up to the individual if they wish to pursue a path to self mastery. You are both right and wrong. Society for a long time has sought to control others and keep them disconnected from understanding their own conciousness- advertisements, modern propaganda, and the entertainment complex have contributed to this mental destabilization.

  • @julianalcantar8776
    @julianalcantar8776 4 місяці тому +22

    The bus driver story reminded me of a book I once read, The Energy Bus.. I definitely recommend for anyone looking for a quick and uplifting read.

  • @AtticusGayle
    @AtticusGayle Місяць тому

    Hidden Time Wealth blew my mind. I’ve shared it with friends, and they’re all amazed at how much more productive they've become.

  • @spiralsun1
    @spiralsun1 4 місяці тому +23

    For some reason I started crying when he talked about the bus driver. ❤️‍🔥🙏🏻❤️‍🔥👁️❤️‍🔥

    • @turquoiseamber5077
      @turquoiseamber5077 4 місяці тому +2

      Me too!!! Bawled my eyes out 😢

    • @Narcissismandlessons-hw6jw
      @Narcissismandlessons-hw6jw 4 місяці тому +5

      we are so starved for kindness and warmth from another, that if we meet one we burst in tears

    • @adamrobert7578
      @adamrobert7578 3 місяці тому +1

      You failed the EI test. This is common among women.

    • @Narcissismandlessons-hw6jw
      @Narcissismandlessons-hw6jw 3 місяці тому

      @@adamrobert7578 do not confuse emotional immaturity , being emotionally dead with EI

    • @aaaaaaaaaa8227
      @aaaaaaaaaa8227 3 місяці тому +1

      yes like finally we got him telling the story here in youtube not just in the book

  • @MicheaAmber
    @MicheaAmber Місяць тому

    The way Hidden Time Wealth dives into the concept of productivity is mind-blowing. Hidden Time Wealth tips are pure gold, and I wish more people knew about them.

  • @redmond2582
    @redmond2582 Місяць тому

    Ameen! Such a brilliant talk and lesson under 12 minutes. I will never be able to pay Daniel back - I promise to add bit more kindness to people on around me.

  • @Sleepybear6032
    @Sleepybear6032 4 місяці тому +3

    I am not cut out to be a lawyer, but I am in the course that leads to that profession currently due to an awkward turn of events. I realise now, how much controlling our emotions is necessary to even do the most basic things in this field and how much I had been lacking in it. This video made me re-evaluate the way I have been taking situations, people's words or life and work in general. Listening to an old man and not some background voice reading off of a script gave me assurance and I sort of felt positive after listening to the bus driver story. I would make EQ a subject that I would look into aside from my hobbies and work from now on. Thanks again.

  • @gademissakis
    @gademissakis 4 місяці тому +2

    Whenever I meet people like the bus driver, I always give my best energy back to them ! They make my day ? I make their day !🙂

  • @henki7728
    @henki7728 4 місяці тому +6

    Talking about emotional intelligence is a joy for me

  • @KyleMatthews-yz5fu
    @KyleMatthews-yz5fu 4 місяці тому +5

    Thank you, Daniel, for your work and for this terrific presentation! Thank you also for your rare, positive example of what ministry actually is, as it has such a sullied reputation in the media. Most ministers are not self-promoting hucksters of "magical thinking," but sincere public servants who quietly go about their work each day moving toward those in pain, those deemed unloveable, and those deemed unredeemable for the good of the whole society. Though flawed human beings like everyone else, my colleagues and I strive to bring wisdom, compassion, and emotional intelligence into every interaction and to be students of the best social science research we can find, like yours!

  • @RSSIPPEL.ART.
    @RSSIPPEL.ART. 4 місяці тому +38

    It's like, there were three of us, whom were talented artists, in my High School. But, when I went to college at The School of Visual Arts; every student was wildly talented. Big fish in a big pond.

    • @abdulrahmanraheem423
      @abdulrahmanraheem423 4 місяці тому +2

      I agree but, as an artist myself I took other artists as inspiration! I get ideas from art work from other artists..in my mind it's not a competition.....

    • @RSSIPPEL.ART.
      @RSSIPPEL.ART. 4 місяці тому +3

      @@abdulrahmanraheem423 Never said I didn't.

    • @silentm999
      @silentm999 4 місяці тому +4

      Gotta be with the best to become your best.

    • @lilnutty6821
      @lilnutty6821 4 місяці тому +2

      ​@@abdulrahmanraheem423I agree with you. The op shouldn't treat art as a competition. Art is subjective man, although you may be surrounded by other talented artists, it doesn't mean you are not talented and you should def learn from them rather than compete with them

    • @blue_samurai_zero
      @blue_samurai_zero 4 місяці тому +1

      How well did you do in grammar and composition?

  • @dandare1001
    @dandare1001 4 місяці тому +24

    At my last company, the boss stressed people out and pushed everyone too hard. He did have some emotional intelligence, and I found him likeable, but he was bad as a boss. I was burned out. I left the company, as have several others since.
    It was a real pity.

  • @TheChurchOfPhakeKnewz
    @TheChurchOfPhakeKnewz 19 днів тому +2

    In New Zealand, it’s common for everyone, young and old, to thank the bus driver with a simple “Thank you” when they exit the bus.

  • @Clra2028
    @Clra2028 4 місяці тому +8

    Apart from the four types of awareness there are two one more from my experience, namely: situational awareness and contextual awareness. When all these 6 types work together like cogs wheels within an individual, the intelligence is created that is then fully in harmony with what is within the best interest of all individuals who are part of every situational dynamic. Without these aspects working together in harmony, emotional intelligence could be present, but not in a creative-generative way. A wholly heart-centered way. Emotional intelligence is invaluable and needs to be considered very very deeply.

  • @JuanitaFlora
    @JuanitaFlora Місяць тому

    The concept of Hidden Time Wealth blew my mind. It’s like finding a cheat code for productivity and defeating procrastination.

  • @MichaelRicharder
    @MichaelRicharder Місяць тому

    Hidden Time Wealth is so unique. I can’t believe I hadn’t heard about it sooner. It’s amazing how life-changing this can be for anyone battling procrastination.

  • @isaacnegocios8822
    @isaacnegocios8822 4 місяці тому +4

    May God bless this guy. This should be a huge asset everyone needs to be inspired on!

  • @alfmar95
    @alfmar95 4 місяці тому +5

    Emotional intelligence should be taught in school but it mainly comes from the parenting. Learning how to be empathetic is one thing but applying it to your everyday life and changing the way you think and brain structure w neuroplascity to become a better person i think is possible. I had issues w how i treated people and emotional issues in college and that wasnt the person i wanted to be. I became more self aware of my actions and who i wanted to be until it became who i am now. I am a very nice person now, and i dont think about it now. Its just who i am. I think with time we can become the people we want to be. But teaching your kids how to have manners and treating people with respect is where it starts!
    If more people cared about eachother we would be more enlightened as a species and this place would be a much better world

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      about 50 people said the same exact Communist Mao re-education brainwashing statement that you just said.

  • @jasongose2975
    @jasongose2975 4 місяці тому +3

    Compassion in place of empathy perhaps. Empathy does give up some of your agency over you emotions. Compassion provides the listening and understanding needed.

  • @renegroulx7029
    @renegroulx7029 4 місяці тому +9

    Heres the thing about EI, know the saying "turn your tongue seven times before you speak" , thing is, emotional reactions are usually instantaneous. I dont think humans really think about or have full control over emotions. People who don't "blow up" and people who are genuinly kind have high EQ. Also, you can't/shouldn't internalize everything because it's unhealthy. So the people who know how to express themselves clearly/properly are also high EQ people.

  • @Tony-m4b
    @Tony-m4b 4 місяці тому +5

    Accountability/ Responsibility Intelligence should be a thing too.

  • @MariaM-up2he
    @MariaM-up2he 26 днів тому

    Since you wrote this book many people think that showing your emotions it’s a non intelligent act. But I tell you been abused by an ex for many years it’s absurd to repressed your emotions. Thanks to attack or fight back when I was attacked using the law I managed to draw very clear boundaries to this abuser. I don’t believe in what you promoted everyone be a subject to abuse and not defend yourself. I tell you be a nice person for many years in my life didn’t help me at all. Only when I saw that I can’t be intimidated by bullies and establish boundaries. Before I was a door mat, not now. People think twice. That’s emotional intelligence.

  • @jaradc2198
    @jaradc2198 4 місяці тому +5

    I'm painfully aware that my emotional intelligence has been low my entire life. I know it's held me back.

  • @lizgichora6472
    @lizgichora6472 4 місяці тому +3

    Very informative, thank you Daniel Goleman. On Emotional intelligence ; self awareness, self management, social awareness, and relationship management. Yes! We love a leader who listens, is empathic and has an even or balanced temperament.

  • @muhammadzulqarnain6562
    @muhammadzulqarnain6562 4 місяці тому +2

    EQ may not lead to material success but surely it is the easiest recipe to happiness.

  • @j.d.blitch5552
    @j.d.blitch5552 4 місяці тому +8

    Videos like this are exactly why I follow this channel

  • @darkcreatureinadarkroom1617
    @darkcreatureinadarkroom1617 3 місяці тому +3

    On the topic of learning to make the effort to listen, I think you can take it a step further and explore what it is that makes you feel like you need to focus on what you are going to say (whether you end up interrupting or not). Is it just pure impulsiveness, self-centeredness, or might there be some underlying anxiety running the show? For example, people with ADHD like myself often fear we are going to forget what we wanted to reply to what you are saying when you inevitably change the topic before you next stop to breathe, and that can lead to interrupting you or worse, blanking on what you say next. When you gain this awareness you can figure out ways to work around your limitations, for instance I know someone who carries a notebook around and takes notes during the conversation just so she doesn't lose track of it. She obviously explains this to the other person (and as a bonus it might prevent the other person from monopolizing the conversation if they are aware of your intense note-taking lol).
    Identifying our limitations and learning to manage them beats making intense raw effort every day in my opinion. Work smart not hard.

    • @coraldell3091
      @coraldell3091 Місяць тому

      Yes I have the problem of people interrupting me..... And when that happens... I lose my train of thought also...... I've always been great at listening to others... But feel I have things to say..... 😂🤔

  • @1IBInternationalBusiness
    @1IBInternationalBusiness 4 місяці тому +1

    One key strategy is self-awareness, where they recognize and understand their own emotions, leading to better control and less impulsivity. They practice mindfulness, which allows them to stay present and maintain calmness in stressful situations.

  • @AuronDzilk
    @AuronDzilk 4 місяці тому +52

    Emotional intelligence classes should be a norm not an oddity

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      bout 50 people said the same exact Communist Mao re-education brainwashing statement that you just said.
      Reply

  • @atulkumarsahu909
    @atulkumarsahu909 3 місяці тому +1

    From writing his EI theories as answers in exams, to watching him so recently feels like next to Highway of Paradise.

  • @Quian-nd1pm
    @Quian-nd1pm 4 місяці тому +1

    I loved coming to the realization that I'd already been in the middle of reading his book prior to watching this video, that tickled me js a bit

  • @meditateforawareness
    @meditateforawareness 4 місяці тому +1

    Emotional intelligence is a human ability and will always remain so. Legendary quote. We need to be in control of artificial intelligence 24 seven. We should be able to power off any artificial intelligence on demand if it threatens humanity or our free will.

    • @dps8629
      @dps8629 4 місяці тому +1

      Its likely that AI will be a more reliable emotional companion after it makes it past current limitations. Also, animals have EQ as well. Orca have a more sophisticated emotional awareness than humans. Dogs are used as emotional support professionally.

    • @meditateforawareness
      @meditateforawareness 4 місяці тому

      @@dps8629 animals are obviously. AI isn’t

    • @dps8629
      @dps8629 4 місяці тому

      @@meditateforawareness I don't see how you've come to that conclusion about something called artificial intelligence and the progression of quantum computation when both of those technologies are in their infancy, but sure.

    • @meditateforawareness
      @meditateforawareness 4 місяці тому

      @@dps8629 Fool!! AI or quantum computation have no capacity for emotional intelligence or a soul, and will most likely never. Unless humans become cyborgs lol. QC and EI are 2 different dimensions. At this point AI is not at an infant stage. what rock are u stuck under? Maybe Q.C is. But still how tf can u assume AI or QC can generate E. I. smh

    • @meditateforawareness
      @meditateforawareness 4 місяці тому

      @@dps8629 AI can pretend to be EI. but they will not have EI lol

  • @craigmerkey8518
    @craigmerkey8518 4 місяці тому +4

    Amazing information ! I completed my MA in SEL (social emotional learning) did my thesis on empathy! If you can regulate and understand your own emotions you can support others!

  • @hjtam88
    @hjtam88 4 місяці тому +16

    Thanks Daniel. I am particularly touched by the story of the bus driver, very inspiring.

  • @Happy_Brown
    @Happy_Brown 2 місяці тому +6

    The bus driver story is quite deep! Wow! Thank you for sharing.

  • @YouilAushana
    @YouilAushana 4 місяці тому +4

    Emotional intelligence is just managing my own emotions.

  • @djtomoy
    @djtomoy 4 місяці тому +3

    I’ve found having a lot of money it an effective way to bypass the need for emotional intelligence

  • @ABC-gt4rd
    @ABC-gt4rd Місяць тому

    it's so much to learn when you grew up in a household with no emotional intelligence

  • @Lamzilla24
    @Lamzilla24 4 місяці тому +1

    I agree that empathy will make a better world

  • @Anoppinion
    @Anoppinion 4 місяці тому

    I agree, but learning about narcissism - was a game changer. There are no reasoning with madness...

  • @JasonHindley
    @JasonHindley 4 місяці тому +1

    I think Goley is right - what a legend. I'll need to read this book.

  • @Katejsej
    @Katejsej 3 місяці тому +5

    I think it is emotional intelligent to watch this video.

    • @victoriarobbertze3828
      @victoriarobbertze3828 3 місяці тому +1

      🤣 I had someone in mind to send this to and thought, "But they won't even watch it."

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      @@victoriarobbertze3828 because they don't get brainwashed as easily as you?

  • @WoodrowThe3rd
    @WoodrowThe3rd 4 місяці тому +14

    Also called being kind and understanding, versus being an asshole.

    • @Rush-h1m
      @Rush-h1m 4 місяці тому

      😂😂😂

    • @user-nc9pc3gr4c
      @user-nc9pc3gr4c 3 місяці тому

      It is good to be an asshole, especially in this brainwashing video

  • @CameronStoneman
    @CameronStoneman Місяць тому

    Discovering Hidden Time Wealth has been one of the best things I've done for my productivity. It feels like I’ve finally cracked the code to overcoming procrastination.

  • @ThisIsMyFullName
    @ThisIsMyFullName 4 місяці тому +31

    As someone who has high emotional intelligence and work as a preschool teacher, it is almost impossible for children to grasp social-emotional learning.
    Children have difficulty understanding other peoples emotions because they put their own emotional needs first the majority of times, and because they don't fully understand their own emotional states and how it can affect others. They will often hold on to anger long after they've forgotten the the experience that made them angry, and even unintentionally aim that anger at someone else.
    They're still learning to structure their emotions in relation to their own comprehension of accountability, and learn the meaning of emotional responsibility. Putting someone else's needs before you own is uncommon for a child to do, let alone grasp the extended value of an unselfish act beyond their own immediate emotional satisfaction.

    • @bassofone1
      @bassofone1 4 місяці тому +7

      Hmmm, as a music teacher, I have noticed that a lot of my younger students have even more capacity for empathy, mindfulness and visionary thinking then the older ones.

    • @ThisIsMyFullName
      @ThisIsMyFullName 4 місяці тому +3

      @@bassofone1 I imagine it's because its related to self-assumption or agreeableness, meaning they want to be nice and good students because of what it says about their own self. In other words, they have parents who taught them good values. It could also be related to introversion, as introverts tend to lean more towards mindful learning. You can have a good artistic mind without necessarily having a high EQ.
      What I'm referring to is more the matter of putting the groups emotional state before you own, in the sense that you apply yourself in such a way that it affects the group and yourself positively. As said in the video, there's a certain sense of leading behaviour when it comes to EQ, and I have yet to see that in a child (I'm speaking of ages 2-6). They're simply too busy trying to understand their own place in the world.

    • @signalfire15
      @signalfire15 4 місяці тому +4

      My nephew is 2 and I feel like he came out of the womb understanding emotional regulation and empathy. He seems like he intuitively just knows things and understands people. When my bro and I sit and talk about serious things, he is patient and sits calmly with us as we talk. He likes people and he likes sharing. He came to my house the other day and saw a teddy. I gave it to him to play with and told him to give it a kiss and he gave it to me and showed me that I should give it a kiss because he understood that it was my teddy and not his. I don’t know why he acts that way because my bro doesn’t teach him that he can’t have things that belong to other people, he seems to just know and act mature somehow. Even when he was a baby, he had the calmest temperament…. My niece on the other hand…… she would burn down the world to get her way lolol

    • @donovangray4246
      @donovangray4246 4 місяці тому +2

      @@ThisIsMyFullName I believe that what you are really expressing is a vison that all children are selfish. Probably because that was what you were told about yourself. If you view a child as good they will act that way. I personally have seen it done by many people who believed in their child's inherent goodness. this is very different from religious homes that believe that because the bible says they were born into sin that they are inherently bad and believe their children are sinful and bad and by acting out their parent's belief about them, they justify their discipline (usually abusive) to alleviate their own sense of shame.

    • @ThisIsMyFullName
      @ThisIsMyFullName 4 місяці тому +2

      ​@@signalfire15 That's very sweet! I do wish more kids had that sort of kind intuition, but it's normal for them not to. When we're babies our parents do everything for us, and this learned behaviour is what we take with us as we become older. You have to be very observant and understand how to read strangers, in order to see the value of giving without receiving. Many adults don't even know how to do that, so for a child to see it, is really a small miracle.
      If I may offer you some advice in relation to your nephew, I would tell you and your family to be mindful of what you discuss in front of him, more so than with your niece. All children are extremely good at reading body language, so if your nephew has a strong social intuition he's probably even more in tuned to how everyone else around him are feeling, and he probably often mirror those feelings unintentionally. Make sure he doesn't take the emotional weight of everyone else around him, on his shoulders. It's a tough lesson to realise that you can't make everyone happy.

  • @doppelkammertoaster
    @doppelkammertoaster 3 місяці тому

    It's all about Metacognition. Without it, it's even harder to look into oneself and change these habits.

  • @NadaMartin
    @NadaMartin 4 місяці тому +5

    love the way the professor explain in the video

  • @Prisoner_844
    @Prisoner_844 4 місяці тому +1

    Big think always lays out issues that really are where we should aim to live to make a better healthier world. They are science based and good natured. I hope society takes serious this in particular. Teaching Emtional and valuing Emtional intelligence.

  • @jyotivyas9286
    @jyotivyas9286 4 місяці тому +3

    Thank u जी। Learnt a lot fromyou. I lll journal it. Dr David Goleman. 😊😊👌💐👍Great EQ Points. 4 Domains. Very Much Beautiful😊❤❤राधे राधे कृष्ण जी।

  • @amandalouks8170
    @amandalouks8170 4 місяці тому +1

    I agree. More EQ would make a better world, no doubt.

  • @Lemariecooper
    @Lemariecooper 4 місяці тому +202

    Making money should be a routine. The secret to making a million is making better investment.

    • @Erikkurilla01
      @Erikkurilla01 4 місяці тому

      Consistent and smart investing is key to building wealth. Making informed investment decisions regularly can significantly increase your chances of reaching that million-dollar milestone.

    • @jessicasquire
      @jessicasquire 4 місяці тому

      You're right! I've been in touch with a financial advisor ever since I started my business. Knowing today's culture, The challenge is knowing when to purchase or sell when investing in trending stocks, which is pretty simple. On my portfolio, which has grown over $900k in a little over a year, my adviser chooses entry and exit orders.

    • @tahirisaid2693
      @tahirisaid2693 4 місяці тому

      Please who is the consultant that assist you with your investment and if you don't mind, how do I get in touch if you don't mind

    • @jessicasquire
      @jessicasquire 4 місяці тому

      Angela Lynn Schilling is the licensed advisor I use. Just research the name. You’d find necessary details to work with a correspondence to set up an appointment.

    • @tahirisaid2693
      @tahirisaid2693 4 місяці тому

      Thank you so much for your helpful tip! I was able to verify the person and book a call session with her. She seems very proficient and I'm really grateful for your guidance

  • @RenitaB.B.
    @RenitaB.B. 26 днів тому

    Daniel Goleman you're the leader I love for educating about emotional intelligence.
    Thank You

  • @ImranShaikh-xj4yy
    @ImranShaikh-xj4yy 3 місяці тому +1

    This helped me self evaluate. I am at the better side of EQ but still need to learn some things. Thank you for the video.

  • @IsabelGP5
    @IsabelGP5 4 місяці тому +1

    I loved this video, it helps to get the message out that it really is quite important to have a good amount of emotional intelligence especially as a leader! I've been in many classrooms where if my teacher seems very unorganized & with zero visible thrill to teach I find myself zoning out and not performing as well as I could be.

  • @Rstytrsrs4325
    @Rstytrsrs4325 3 місяці тому +3

    Thanks for the video, great explanation of the set up.

  • @muhammad-emdad-rony
    @muhammad-emdad-rony 4 місяці тому

    This is big happiness for me seeing you in here. Expect will get you here again.

  • @Leafyfpv
    @Leafyfpv 4 місяці тому

    .. thats whats its like to change a habit will stay with me for years

  • @rolansanchez7046
    @rolansanchez7046 4 місяці тому +1

    Without my high emotional intelligence I could have killed myself in my 20s, glad that I'm still alive now that I'm in my 40s despite so many hardships I experienced ALONE.

  • @PrimalRageTV
    @PrimalRageTV 4 місяці тому +25

    Ive read EQ 2.0. I scored an 86 on my first guaging test. Ive been teaching this in my youtube spaces to other male content creators. I need a version of this to help us men who are extremely rough around the edges, grew up in the hood, abusive upbringings, military, etc...

    • @KDTechverse
      @KDTechverse 4 місяці тому +9

      Kudos to you mate ! All the best for your goal !

  • @ConnieLisar
    @ConnieLisar Місяць тому

    There's a book called Hidden Time Wealth, and it talks about how using some secret techniques, you can overcome procrastination and accomplish anything in life. It's not just a bunch of empty promises; it's the real deal.

  • @poojanoone822
    @poojanoone822 4 місяці тому

    She's not a norm, she's an exception.
    Please don't to hard on yourself if, you do look your age, everybody is different and life isn't kind to everyone.

  • @HandyMan657
    @HandyMan657 4 місяці тому +1

    This is excellent, just 1 thing. Kids need to be kids, so let them be. Teach this to older kids, like 8th grade and on, that's when they really need it. Thanks, Doc

  • @balaton1
    @balaton1 Місяць тому

    Mark Twain said "Kindness is the language the deaf can hear. And the blind can see." Twain's quote hit me harder in 3 seconds than this 12 min video.

  • @berkefeil5646
    @berkefeil5646 4 місяці тому

    I think people often mistake the inability to control one’s emotions with low emotional intelligence, but the former can be triggered by lots of stuff unrelated to EQ (bad/traumatic past experiences, stressful times, certain physical conditions etc.). Maybe a high EQ can help coping with lots of issues but it’s not like it gives you everything you need to deal with tough emotions. Though, lots of jerks could indeed benefit from some extra EQ points, haha.
    What also seems somewhat disregarded is that a functional EQ and good social interactions often are about what NOT to pay attention to. Sensitive people can be exceedingly in tough with other people’s energy and therefore lose the ability to be their best selves. ‘Registering too much’ is bad too.

  • @prilen1
    @prilen1 4 місяці тому

    Emotions run our lives so we should learn about them

  • @Khvkumar
    @Khvkumar 2 місяці тому

    It really made me happy and gave confidence. Emotional intelligence is necessary for every human being.
    Thank you sir.

  • @damienhunt4264
    @damienhunt4264 4 місяці тому +5

    When you work with someone who is trying to use some of these stategies and you can see that it is not natural for them, they come across as inauthentic, and that reduces them in my view.

    • @hollyandstelladoodle8748
      @hollyandstelladoodle8748 4 місяці тому +1

      Ouch, if I read this correctly. Trying to learn how to raise your EQ is a struggle for some. Practicing these strategies feels uncomfortable, but is necessary for our personal growth. It can definitely come across as false.
      I hope I’m wrong, but are you saying you look down on those trying to improve? Or just that inauthenticity makes you uncomfortable?

    • @damienhunt4264
      @damienhunt4264 4 місяці тому

      @@hollyandstelladoodle8748 The latter.

    • @humptydumpty-m8u
      @humptydumpty-m8u 4 місяці тому

      started to confuse

    • @HAPPLIP
      @HAPPLIP 4 місяці тому +2

      Every new venture is unnatural until its natural.
      If you were to learn something new, would you like to hear what you just said?

  • @suzylux
    @suzylux 4 місяці тому +1

    We need this more than EVER right now in our world.
    ps. Daniel, maybe the Times could use a guy like you again.

  • @Sylar-451
    @Sylar-451 4 місяці тому

    Couldn't agree more that better societal EQ would make a better world! Writing a book on why it's so important after being depressed for 20+ years with the emotional intelligence of a watermelon until more recently.

  • @MamaBear01234
    @MamaBear01234 2 місяці тому +2

    Love the Govan Brown story!

  • @blondiesque_8237
    @blondiesque_8237 4 місяці тому +1

    what an amazing video, this should be compulsory watching for all organisations with KPI.

  • @lambda.403
    @lambda.403 Місяць тому

    Thanks for the video. I used to think that I was born with low EQ, I was born with it, everything will never change. After watching this video, somehow I find myself motivated by learning it. It's a checkpoint in my life after watching this video, dunno how to say. Thank you.
    Btw, if you have any piece of recommendation or sources of content that can help us improve our social skill, EQ, etc... Let's share.

  • @alfwok
    @alfwok 4 місяці тому +7

    If high emotional intelligence makes you more empathetic and sympathetic towards others wouldn't that hinder your ability to be successful in a society where making as much money as possible is the measure of success? They keep showing people in business settings and relationships but I would imagine someone with high emotional intelligence to be like a Buddhist monk or something.

    • @blake8510
      @blake8510 4 місяці тому +6

      Bingo. Apathy is more valued for the bottom line in my opinion. You care about your employees, but ultimately turning a profit will always come first. Unfortunate setting in which we live.

  • @realsillyyuri
    @realsillyyuri 3 місяці тому +2

    I enjoyed this. Really great and informative video.