The reactions to kid Ryan slamming a child to the ground and then finding out he was racist have the same energy as Shane finding out the Ax Man was racist
This show has evolved and grown so much that it doesn't even feel like "Shane" anymore. Like Professor is honestly its own mysterious chaotic entity and Shane is merely trapped being its power source.
Imagine being 12 years old and hearing of this country bumpkin that straight up murdered not just one but TWO of your older, more skilled relatives and then your family just looks at you like "alright buddy, you're up". The audacity.
Never did I think that a song about disconnected gay oars that were separated because one had to be turned into a sword to kill an esteemed samurai by an equally but secretly more esteemed samurai would be genuinely moving and very very well done
The lore so far: -The professor is either an immortal or a time traveler -He has had a run in with a genie AND he’s used up all of his wishes. -The genie possibly turned him into a puppet (the one episode where he mentioned the genie tricking you even if you phrase something just right) -The jelly beans in the coveted cup given to the episode’s history master turns them into a puppet, but the ones in his book bag do not (Black Death episode - Steven and Ryan both take beans and eat them on camera, although that was the first episode so lore may not count there)
-the professor eating his own jellybean shits -the professor farming and eating spiders -cats being the natural predator of puppets -puppet discrimination is canon
The reason he carved the oar into a sword is because Sasaki's sword was huge. Like really big. A three shaku blade (35.5 inches or so). For reference a typical katana is about 24 inches. Musashi would have been at a significant reach disadvantage, so he carved the boat's oar to be a wooden sword 43 inches long. Giving him the reach advantage.
Yups sasaki is the master of Nodachi (straight edged long sword) and a really a good one qt that according to the story, Musashi in the other hand is used normal length katana
So irl Ryan lore * He's been able to throw kids at 12 with pure strength * He was given a mysterious katana * He fell into some bricks and has some memory because of it
Imagine being the Professor and politely asking your guests if they've ever been in a fight to get your students engaged in your topic, imagining that you'll maybe hear about some drunken fisticuffs or something. And instead your good friend Ryan just casually drops into the conversation that he physically picked up and slammed a racist child into the ground at age 12. How do you even recover man I would be unable to think about anything else for at least 3 weeks
I remember kicking the ass of a Drug Dealers kid for picking on a cat when I was in 6th grade. I had no idea and didn’t know what a Drug dealer even was. My mom quickly made me apologize to which he said I did nothing wrong and said he’s seen that I was a good kid to people when they earned it and that his son was being a shit that day. So yeah Drug Dealer said I was within my right to kick his kids ass, I guess professionals do have standards
@@ThirrinDiamond probably the closest thing my Mom ever came to a near death experience as far as I know lol. Ignorance is Bliss, I had no idea what I was doing or who I was messing with until I got told about it years later.
@@fist-of-doom487 ........ you escaped a potential maffia. Thats fucking insane man. I hope yall are safer now and the trauma isnt too intense for either of ya 💗
@@ThirrinDiamond nah, we laugh about it now and I feel a certain amount of pride. No lasting trauma from it, in fact I couldn’t even say their was trauma in the moment. That was YEARS ago. I’m 26 now
I love Garrick and the Professor's initial shock at Ryan picking up someone over his head and slamming him into the ground, until Ryan said that the kid was being racist and then they were like "that's understandable". Mood tbh
theory: Something went down with the professor and a genie and sense the professor owes him, the genie is making him collect souls by giving people jelly beans that turn them into puppets and the professor is trying to save ryan by making him lose every time.
everyone here is just ignoring the wonderful moments where the Professor is clueless about sports but still trying to follow along with Ryan and Garrick's Sports Bro Talk
Also sort of explains why the stories mentioned here talk of how he bludgeoned his opponents. And why the younger brother looked to be stabbed by his own sword instead Musashi’s.
plot twist: the professor is slowly turning all of the guests into puppets so he can recruit a giant puppet army which he will use to challenge the genie that turned him into a puppet. If the genie doesn't turn him back, he will intstead turn every human into a puppet, except for his dear friend ryan, who he's been trying to protect all along.
Not only did Musashi carry a sword, he's know for carrying two - Deadpool style. That's actually why a gene I have studied (as a biochemist) is called Musashi - because it looks like that classic two-sword pose.
You mean 2 katanas at once? Most samurai did carry 2 swords, but while one of them would be indeed a katana, the other would be a wakizashi, more of a short sword/knife.
1) Garrick liking the songs at the end of the production is hilarious because he notoriously hates musicals (as mentioned on every Guilty Pleasures podcast featuring a musical) 2) Ryan being the kind of kid who can slam DUNK a kid into the ground is exactly the kind of challenger Musashi would have loved to have had 3) Garrick and Ryan are the duo teachers would constantly have to separate at school because they'd keep joking around with each other
Theory: The professor was once a human who was forced to eat one of the genie’s jelly beans in return for 3 wishes, turning him into a puppet forever. Since them the genie has forced him to lure unknowing participants into eating those same jelly beans and face the same fate as he. He is forced to lure unknowing participants into his game and ‘reward’ them at the end, really dooming them to the same fate as he... When Ryan ‘looses’ an episode of puppet history, he really is winning because the professor is protecting him from spending the rest of his life living as a puppet...
theory: ryan is actually being protected by the professor if he is spreading his puppetry disease by jelly beans. also hey garrick. garrick. why. why do you have that puppet. who made that for you. i have questions. GARRICK.
@@melaniemagolan2241 that does explain that but then why. why does he have it. did shane call garrick to be like, hey i need to send you this puppet for a bit
29:53 hate how nobody is talking about this. this song is about gay OARS and shane SNAPPED. if you look a bit past the comedy, this is honestly really beautiful.
"I mean I know he's a serial killer, but I kinda wish he was my dad!" "Well for the right price, he could be" It has been a loooong time since I've laughed so hard at anything, thank you for Puppet History
are we not gonna talk about the implied lore of garrick eating the jelly bean and turning into a puppet?? what does that mean???? how does the puppet world work?????? who gave professor mcnasty a jelly bean- is the professor what happens when someone becomes the real and true history master????????? THE IMPLICATIONS
After the season 4 finale, I thought it would be fun to go back through the other videos and find out the real scores in each to see if Ryan actually won any. This will be focused on the points won during the questions only, not the extra points the professor gives out willy-nilly. Actual Score: Ryan had 5 points and Garrick had 5. It was a tie, but you could say Ryan won because he wasn't turned into a puppet.
Well, Ryan would be capable of murder with no problem. He looks mentally unstable to me, aparently from some prolonged childhood trauma or something similar, and he shows zero empathy quite often. He scares me, tbh.
Yes! When the oar was sad he was like "you ok?" Immediately made me want to see more of him! And that ending! Perfect! Would love to see him come back!
ngl musashi seems like the kind of guy who'd have a 'who can walk faster on the sidewalk' mental competitions with strangers on the street and then really get into it and congratulate himself when he won
can i just say that one of my favourite things about this show is that they dont just do american history? like, they do america and asia and africa and things that i learnt at school (as a brit). i just think its cool bc we dont rly get to hear about much that happens outside europe in my school
You know, the entire thing of him murdering someone at 13 years old and then deciding swordfighting was the life for him makes me think it was more about being a murderer than a samurai
They did accept a duel i mean he couldnt run or do anything else. If you think hes a murderer then everyone who fought in wars are murderers as well by ur logic. If you were in a war and there was a child there that had volunteered and had a gun ur not just going to die and accept that.
My kid has started watching these with me, and when this came out he had just gotten a 'magic board', so he spent the episode answering along with Ryan and Garrick. (Also he loves The Professor)
Important detail is that kojiro used a longer than normal katana, which is why Musashi used the oar, as kojiro was used to having the reach advantage, so Musashi made his oar slightly longer giving him the win
“I mean, I know he’s a serial killer, but I kinda wish he was my dad.” “Well, for the right price he could be.” These two are so casually unhinged, I love it 🤣
I love the backgroud characters holding a sign that says "Why are these signs in English?" while one of the most wild stories I've ever heard was happening
I did a lot of research on musashi back in middle school. I read his equivalent of "the art of war" and it carried me through my middleschool/highschool wrestling career. I remember shaving the bark off of branches and making "swords" with the neighborhood kids and we would have little duels.
How great would it be to have Puppet Garrick as The Professor’s TA next season?? I’d love it. And I was really looking forward to seeing Garrick on this show bc he was fantastic on Ruining History, and he was as awesome here as I was hoping.
Helen so they could do it like he pops in at the beginning and is like oh I’m a TA now I’m going to be grading papers/taking tally’s, he could have a little screen where he pops up and introduces the musical guest and helps with outros He could maybe also pop up and do a little call and be like hey I just found this fun fact about this part of the episode That way he doesn’t have to be physically there in the theater and it ties in with the online PU of video calls etc
There was a South American native Chief who caused such problems for the Spanish, that when they caught him, they cut off both his hands and set him free; as if to say, "He's no threat now"; only to have him fit knives to the ends of his stumps and make a come back!
My mom said that samurais were “very sexist” and the edo period was terrible for women. I havent fact checked her but we do descend from a samurai so the call is coming from inside the house if you know what I mean. On a positive note, I also heard samurais were hella gay.
This episode is honestly my favourite among all 5 seasons. This is peak comedy at its most absurd level. Honestly, the GOAT when it comes to Puppet History. It's a close tie between this, the Isaac Newton episode with Keith, and the Jose Rizal episode.
Backstory: The professor does not let Ryan win because he wants Ryan to remain human and not a puppet.
Makes sense considering Ryan is a sucker for jelly beans
OH MY GOSH!!!!! DemonShane protecting Ryan in all forms bye
the people on the show aren't contestants, they're Victims
just like edward and bella
I would love to see all the past winners turn into puppets...
I believe puppet history is technically eligible for several Tony’s
...what? How do we get this puppet a Tony? pls share your wisdom
An Obie at least.
don’t forget the emmys
I second this notion good sir
Technically. The best kind of eligible.
The story: happened centuries ago
Ryan: I hope he doesn't die
Me: who's gonna tell him
Don't you dare
nobody gon talk abt how theres only 8 dislikes. ppl just blind.
@@xenophiliuslovegood6914 agreed, he's too pure
Xenophilius Lovegood somebody’s gotta tell him
@@ally2930 🙉
The reactions to kid Ryan slamming a child to the ground and then finding out he was racist have the same energy as Shane finding out the Ax Man was racist
wait this is literally so true. HAHAHH
Yeah so weird. He killed people… “okay” and was racist “what a piece of shit!”
Or finding out Ken Rex McElroy was a pedophile
“OAR, weren’t we?”
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
We don’t deserve Shane. This is amazing.
I love Garrick softly saying the songs aren’t dumb and he likes them, Ryan begrudgingly admitting he knows and everyone likes them.
Who’s Shane? All I know is the Professor
@@Ryebreaded Shane voices the Professor
Mauricia he is joking
@@AmethystEyes Oh
Shane: "the only person qualified to sing a duet with me is me"
“I see no god up here - OTHER THAN ME.”
He didn't lie tho
Shane? I only know Professor.
Wow, if Ryan can lift someone up over his head and slammed them into the ground as a child, imagine what he can do to a puppet
The professor is an immortal being, Ryan is no challenge for him
If Ryan tries to attack the Professor, the samurai sword will protect him🔪
You're scaring the professor
@@fuzzyfizz Good
@@shai_latte_3683 that little bastard is stealing souls!
Musashi: Now I've thrown him off his rhythm. STREET SMARTS!
Fuckin had me wheezing lmfao
goddamned john mullaney lol
Bittenbinder probablly could have read that book. Probably got a lot from it.
HAHAHAHAHAHA
Musashi was the apprentice of J.J. Bittenbinder lmao
Shane is on another level, out here harmonizing with HIMSELF
IKR
Or maybe Shane has a twin?
Like Jeff Lynne of Electric Light Orchestra
This show has evolved and grown so much that it doesn't even feel like "Shane" anymore. Like Professor is honestly its own mysterious chaotic entity and Shane is merely trapped being its power source.
shane is the genie
Shane is his roommate and protects himself from the cat
honestly im building this whole theory for the professors backstory
Shane came across a genie and his wish was to continue ruining history but sprinkle in more ✨theatre✨ and the genie obliged and now Shane is trapped
Demon, man.
Remember Shane inviting Demons into his body?
Demon got him
Imagine being 12 years old and hearing of this country bumpkin that straight up murdered not just one but TWO of your older, more skilled relatives and then your family just looks at you like "alright buddy, you're up". The audacity.
Right??!! Poor kid!
It’s worse than that, it was his dad and his uncle :(
Late, but that poor kid certainly deserved better.
Never did I think that a song about disconnected gay oars that were separated because one had to be turned into a sword to kill an esteemed samurai by an equally but secretly more esteemed samurai would be genuinely moving and very very well done
It needs to be its own musical!
No but literally why is the songwriting so good, I love it.
The lore so far:
-The professor is either an immortal or a time traveler
-He has had a run in with a genie AND he’s used up all of his wishes.
-The genie possibly turned him into a puppet (the one episode where he mentioned the genie tricking you even if you phrase something just right)
-The jelly beans in the coveted cup given to the episode’s history master turns them into a puppet, but the ones in his book bag do not (Black Death episode - Steven and Ryan both take beans and eat them on camera, although that was the first episode so lore may not count there)
Fucking hell Was this all just an excuse to continue the hot dog saga
😮
-the professor eating his own jellybean shits
-the professor farming and eating spiders
-cats being the natural predator of puppets
-puppet discrimination is canon
The real reason Ryan never wins...
And that's why Shane never lets Ryan win
Somebody give Shane Madej a hug cause these last 2 songs have been devastating. Catch me crying over gay oars and a clipped coin at 2 am.
Same sis
Yes 😭
@Raea let’s make a club
@@hannahpchism absolutely let's do that😂
not to mention the train that couldn't carry Lincoln
Can we talk about 1. shane's vocal range and 2. the fact he said gay rights for ores
1, it’s oars
2. I love your comment
We stan a same-object love supporter.
@JAYLA SANCHEZ WOAH WOAH HOLD IT THERE BUSTER
I mean, he made Maisy a lesbian in the hotdoga, so what did you expect XD
(though I also love how he does it so smoothly that it never feels preachy)
👏time👏stamps👏
The reason he carved the oar into a sword is because Sasaki's sword was huge. Like really big. A three shaku blade (35.5 inches or so). For reference a typical katana is about 24 inches. Musashi would have been at a significant reach disadvantage, so he carved the boat's oar to be a wooden sword 43 inches long. Giving him the reach advantage.
Yups sasaki is the master of Nodachi (straight edged long sword) and a really a good one qt that according to the story, Musashi in the other hand is used normal length katana
Help why does this sound like Ye Olde Dick Measuring Competition
This is hilarious and badass.
Couldn't he get a bigger metal sword before that???
@@liriodendronlasianthus yes, but that would be exactly what his opponent would be expecting. Also, hello fellow Starkid fan!
@@DarkestElemental616 Hello fellow Starkid!
Well, that makes this whole affair way way funnier.
Musashi is literally the most savage person in history, this man straight up SLEPT while his opponent got ready to kill him 💀💀💀💀💀
Why did I originally read this as “this man slept with his opponent” 💀
17’s Diamond Life
I mean, that sounds par for the course
@@17sdiamondlife2 svt stan? a CARAT?
baby yoda Hey!! 👋
Omg carat watcherssss
A DUET?! THE PROFESSOR IS BRINGING HIS A GAME THIS SEASON!
YES! As a musician, it was amazing
Give credit to where it’s due...to the oars!
(Really to Shane)
What can I say
I read this comment before the video began and wait for the whole video
It was worth it
Asma Shareen Very worth it
theory: the professor actually really appreciates ryan, he doesn’t let him win because that would mean he has to leave
NO THATS SAD IM ALREADY CRYING OVER THE OARS 🥺🥺🥺
omg TT
Omfg I’m gonna cry
brUh if any of my teachers prevented me from passing so i wouldnt leave, i'd be--- wtf 😂
@@ziqqyziqqy same, man. Fucking same 🤣
Ryan: “You’ve seen this show right? You see these dumb songs?”
Garrick: “They’re not dumb. I like them.”
Ryan: “I know. Everyone does.”
I felt this because my dad was a substitute teacher that all the kids loved and made up songs 🥴
Well atleast Ryan is self aware that he is the only one who hates these songs.
@@gabyschirripa5244 your dad sounds awesome
This is even funnier because Garrick notoriously hates musicals lmao
@@mars_mayday there is nothing funnier than his pure valid hatred for the greatest showman
i can't believe i DIDN'T expect a heartbreaking homoromantic song about two oars from mr madej
I believe you mean Professor
You mean the oars
i didnt expect anything less from the guy who lay down on a pentagram and screamed "rock and roll buckaroo"
New theory: Ryan has a little notebook he's using to actually tally history points in hes never ceasing quest to become history master
That'd be funny though lol
He won once
@@kassidytucker8431 When?
Kassidy Tucker He only tied
@@MrNarwhaI nah, when you tally up actual question points without the bullshit Ryan has either won or tied every episode beside the last two
So irl Ryan lore
* He's been able to throw kids at 12 with pure strength
* He was given a mysterious katana
* He fell into some bricks and has some memory because of it
He’s basically an anime character at this point
@@gretablackwell495 I'm just waiting for it to be reveal that Ryan actually went through secret warrior training
Don't forget being menaced by a tube of toothpaste #neverforget
Andrew A he also was apparently born with the dry skin of a lizard
His father is a serial killer dentist and his mother has claimed to be an alien
Imagine being the Professor and politely asking your guests if they've ever been in a fight to get your students engaged in your topic, imagining that you'll maybe hear about some drunken fisticuffs or something. And instead your good friend Ryan just casually drops into the conversation that he physically picked up and slammed a racist child into the ground at age 12. How do you even recover man I would be unable to think about anything else for at least 3 weeks
I remember kicking the ass of a Drug Dealers kid for picking on a cat when I was in 6th grade. I had no idea and didn’t know what a Drug dealer even was. My mom quickly made me apologize to which he said I did nothing wrong and said he’s seen that I was a good kid to people when they earned it and that his son was being a shit that day. So yeah Drug Dealer said I was within my right to kick his kids ass, I guess professionals do have standards
@@fist-of-doom487 OH MY GAWWWDDDDD
@@ThirrinDiamond probably the closest thing my Mom ever came to a near death experience as far as I know lol. Ignorance is Bliss, I had no idea what I was doing or who I was messing with until I got told about it years later.
@@fist-of-doom487 ........ you escaped a potential maffia. Thats fucking insane man. I hope yall are safer now and the trauma isnt too intense for either of ya 💗
@@ThirrinDiamond nah, we laugh about it now and I feel a certain amount of pride. No lasting trauma from it, in fact I couldn’t even say their was trauma in the moment. That was YEARS ago. I’m 26 now
I can't believe Ryan is the guy who screamed like a maniac in the old city jail and also the same guy who slammed a racist kid over his head at 12
that pile of bricks really did a number on him
ghosts are scary! racists just need a good beatin'.
a man of many talents
It’s funny cause I feel like Shane is exactly the opposite. He is unperturbed by ghosts but would get beaten up by a 12 year old now.
The difference between ghosts and racists is racists can bleed lmao
that ending omgggg now i demand a ryan puppet just to mess with him lmaooo
bruh just like hearing his voice in the Hotdoga lmaooooooooo
Oh for sure! I totally agree that we need that to happen
ryan would be so mad ahah
Ryan's various names/alter-egos:
. Ryan Bergara
. Ricky Goldsworth
. Balls Balls
. Beef Man/Boy
Alex you forgot “Night Night”
@@AmethystEyes And Brad Pistachio!
Lmao I forgot about Balls Balls
And also Ryan’s official Aliases
Beef man
Also B Boy!
I love Garrick and the Professor's initial shock at Ryan picking up someone over his head and slamming him into the ground, until Ryan said that the kid was being racist and then they were like "that's understandable". Mood tbh
Nah, cows moo.
Ryan deserved a jellybean for that, honestly.
the immediate shift from "woah, holy shit dude??" to "oh okay fuck that guy lmao"
@@glassphoenix9095 so real like at first I was like "dam you go tiny" to "oh WOW you GO tiny"
Theory: Shane is the genie but the reason the Professor owes him is that Shane is actually a demon
THIS tbeory is by far my favorite
YOUR ONTO SOMETHING
IN FACT, when Shane stole the Goatman's Bridge, he might have imprisoned the Goatman in the Professor!
@@Karin_Allen Damn it. I was going to say the same thing
Karin Allen THATS SO GOOD
The “face” The Professor made when he learned about Ryan’s flight ability seriously made him question antagonizing him was priceless!
timestamp
wait ryan can fly?
Typo they meant FIGHT everybody
damn I'd be shocked if I learned my mortal enemy could fly
Ryan, casually: "oh yea I body slammed a racist once"
That's precisely the thought I had when that happened
That’s at least 3 jellybeans worth!
iconic
honestly good for him
as one should (✿◠‿◠)
This show really is just 'guy puts on a puppet show for his friends where one of them is begrudgingly delighted and one is enthusiastically delighted'
theory: Something went down with the professor and a genie and sense the professor owes him, the genie is making him collect souls by giving people jelly beans that turn them into puppets and the professor is trying to save ryan by making him lose every time.
That is absolutely perfect I showed my sister this comment she said that no one else has turned into a puppet.
pack it up demon shane
How does that explain the fact that one lady has 3 trophies
@@zachkubish598 damn u right 😔
Czakarie Kubish you right
I love the sign during the fight that says "why are these signs in English?"
Mrs. Bennett omg I just realized 😂
everyone here is just ignoring the wonderful moments where the Professor is clueless about sports but still trying to follow along with Ryan and Garrick's Sports Bro Talk
Always with the double rim argument ❔❔❔😕
Lololol!! Someone else picked up on that!
I'm shocked that as alpha-bro as Shane is that he doesn't follow sports.
Ok but the dogs barking got me. I thought my dogs were barking.
fun fact: Miyamoto didn’t use steel swords, he commonly used wooden swords, as he wanted to prove his level of skill to his opponent
Ok but this explained 10:18 for me
Also sort of explains why the stories mentioned here talk of how he bludgeoned his opponents. And why the younger brother looked to be stabbed by his own sword instead Musashi’s.
Shout out to young Ryan for fighting that racist boy. Ricky Goldsworth jumped out; talk shit get hit.
This whole season I've actually been thinking one day that ricky goldsworth is coming out and when that they comes were all screwed
@@o0Scarrow0o Ricky Goldsworth v. The Professor: who will win!?
Ricky Goldsworth has always been around, Ryan just hadn't named him until Unsolved.
@@KatieTheKraken big brain time
"Oh no Ryan don't chuck kids! Oh he was racist? Oh ok get his ass"
Love to see it
plot twist: the professor is slowly turning all of the guests into puppets so he can recruit a giant puppet army which he will use to challenge the genie that turned him into a puppet. If the genie doesn't turn him back, he will intstead turn every human into a puppet, except for his dear friend ryan, who he's been trying to protect all along.
Good
The professor is actually protecting Ryan by not giving him the jelly beans.
IS THAT WHY HE WONT LET RYAN WIN?? COS THE WINNERS GET TURNED INTO PUPPETS?
That's crazy good lore😂💯
Lowkey reminds me of Bugsnax-
Ryan and Garrick radiate the same energy as wake and bake college students in a class they love and it fills me with such joy.
@@JohannesVanDerStuyvebode better than sleepin’ and weepin’ I suppose
Not only did Musashi carry a sword, he's know for carrying two - Deadpool style. That's actually why a gene I have studied (as a biochemist) is called Musashi - because it looks like that classic two-sword pose.
Dual wielding?!?! Man that’s some anime crap right there. Well I’m not surprised his life sounds like a two season shonen.
This is so dope
I assumed that cause the picture has 2 swords and at the end it said something like 2 swords style or something. But damn that's cool
You mean 2 katanas at once? Most samurai did carry 2 swords, but while one of them would be indeed a katana, the other would be a wakizashi, more of a short sword/knife.
@@ismet1664 yes, 2 katanas at once. As I said, like Deadpool.
The professor is actually protecting Ryan by not giving him the jelly beans.
Why do you think the winners never come back?
@@DB-wb1tz KP did
@@umaaamiii she is different than the others
@@umaaamiii she's immune because of the tie in the second episode
@@drfreudsmom she is in on it...
im sorry but mikinosuke's parents selling him has the same energy as y/n getting sold to one direction by her drug addict mother
I'm dead. This is underrated
HOW DOES THIS NOT HAVE MORE LIKES
@@casstheshifter2176 lmao i posted this like a week after the video went up
LMFAOO.
PLEASE BAHAHAHAH
1) Garrick liking the songs at the end of the production is hilarious because he notoriously hates musicals (as mentioned on every Guilty Pleasures podcast featuring a musical)
2) Ryan being the kind of kid who can slam DUNK a kid into the ground is exactly the kind of challenger Musashi would have loved to have had
3) Garrick and Ryan are the duo teachers would constantly have to separate at school because they'd keep joking around with each other
Theory: The professor was once a human who was forced to eat one of the genie’s jelly beans in return for 3 wishes, turning him into a puppet forever. Since them the genie has forced him to lure unknowing participants into eating those same jelly beans and face the same fate as he. He is forced to lure unknowing participants into his game and ‘reward’ them at the end, really dooming them to the same fate as he... When Ryan ‘looses’ an episode of puppet history, he really is winning because the professor is protecting him from spending the rest of his life living as a puppet...
Omfgg so the professor is actually saving Ryan from a puppet fate cause he cares about him and likes having him around 😭😭😭 my heartttt
All those arguments with each other and the professor must be thinking " if only you knew" " this is for your own good" OW MY FRIEKIN HEART
IN REALITY THE PROFESSOR CARES ABOUT RYAN AND THAT'S WHY HE ALWAYS LOOSES CHANGE MY MIND
Omggg. That's gotta be it. 🙈
Hecc ye!
I need a Puppet History on the six wives of King Henry VIII
I know, there’s a musical. BUT- there could be more and we need more
I'd watch that so many times
Lexie Herman Me too
Evyen Biwer YES
Evyen Biwer I need to hear Professor sung Get Down. It’ll make my day
Evyen Biwer True, true
theory: ryan is actually being protected by the professor if he is spreading his puppetry disease by jelly beans.
also hey garrick. garrick. why. why do you have that puppet. who made that for you. i have questions. GARRICK.
That’s a puppet you can order. My local theatre used the same exact puppet as Gary Coleman in Avenue Q.
@@melaniemagolan2241 that does explain that but then why. why does he have it. did shane call garrick to be like, hey i need to send you this puppet for a bit
“Trust me, it’ll mindfuck so many people it’s gonna be hilarious man.”
impishclutter why don’t you own a puppet? They’re fun
29:53 hate how nobody is talking about this. this song is about gay OARS and shane SNAPPED. if you look a bit past the comedy, this is honestly really beautiful.
I... Professor? Blink if you're being held hostage by a Genie.
Yea we need to know
If the professor ever blinked though I would be so scared
Does the professor even have eyelids though?
@@Travel_with_Gigi That's how we know for a fact that he is in trouble, when he finally blinks after 10 episodes 😂
@@o0Scarrow0o He's a man of mystery... 😂
Shane is out here harmonizing with himself like Beyonce do. He is on another level.
“I am Beyoncé always.”
Oh my god Garrick turning into a puppet at the end killed me
“It hurts..”
Ryan and the professor slowly becoming more theatrical in their hatred for each other is the subplot I didn't know I needed
The dislikes are just Ryan creating different accounts because he’s still bitter about losing.
Not my fault he's not good enough...
The Professor I hope some day they allow you on the rides at Disney
"I mean I know he's a serial killer, but I kinda wish he was my dad!"
"Well for the right price, he could be"
It has been a loooong time since I've laughed so hard at anything, thank you for Puppet History
are we not gonna talk about the implied lore of garrick eating the jelly bean and turning into a puppet?? what does that mean???? how does the puppet world work?????? who gave professor mcnasty a jelly bean- is the professor what happens when someone becomes the real and true history master????????? THE IMPLICATIONS
Rory what if that's why the professor won't let Ryan win any episodes? Because it's Beef Boy's legacy to break the curse. 'Twas in the prophecy.
Is it the Genie who gave the Professor the jelly bean?
All guests should be required to eat a jelly bean...
@Sonzai Shinai That sounds like a fever dream. I'm all for it tbh
does the whole jelly bean thing imply that the professor was once human sized? was there a 6" blue fuzzy dude just walking around?
After the season 4 finale, I thought it would be fun to go back through the other videos and find out the real scores in each to see if Ryan actually won any. This will be focused on the points won during the questions only, not the extra points the professor gives out willy-nilly.
Actual Score: Ryan had 5 points and Garrick had 5. It was a tie, but you could say Ryan won because he wasn't turned into a puppet.
🫘
i have been waiting for someone to do this, thank u!
@@LivingMyLife22 why saumsage
@@Who_evenamIanymore These are beans my friend
Ryan: i picked him up over his head and threw him on the ground
The Professor: *F E A R*
“That’s a pretty bird” “Jesus that’s not a pretty bird” Beef boy 2020
And that’s why shrikes are my favorite bird
Shrikes are best bird
Beef man* EXUSE YOU
ua-cam.com/video/5SldBtvWFhM/v-deo.html
I love how that's just his name now
this week on puppet history: twelve year old killers and gay oars
Truly 😂😂
@Anthony Lucero JAIL FOR YOU
@Anthony Lucero 😀what
Quality content
as a gay (wh)o(re)ar i love this comment and this episode
"Sometimes you gotta make a business decision" is maybe one of the most stone cold phrases i've ever heard refer to murder.
Well, Ryan would be capable of murder with no problem. He looks mentally unstable to me, aparently from some prolonged childhood trauma or something similar, and he shows zero empathy quite often. He scares me, tbh.
The more stories I hear of Ryans childhood, the more everything makes sense
it's all coming together
Didnt he almost brained himself on a pavement once and got hit by lighting once or is that just me halucinating him say that
alifia ! I think so and his mum put herself in the washing machine or something and told him she wasn’t his real mum I can’t remember😂😭
@@eleanorgouldie9355 Yeah. She put a wig in the washing machine and told him that his real mom was in the washer, I think.
@@eleanorgouldie9355 😂😂 what?!
why is no one talking about how adorable garrick is
Emyliine literally would adorable
Yes! When the oar was sad he was like "you ok?" Immediately made me want to see more of him! And that ending! Perfect! Would love to see him come back!
Dimples for days
He needs to come back he is so bloody adorable
He's also the best audience ever! It was so amazing to see him react!
Nobody:
Me: I hope those gay oars work out their relationship problems..
mood
Me, way too often
From the future: well-
Same! They're presious and I love them.
@@midnightramblings i hope its not a will they oar won't they situation.😏
imagine if that family just kept going down the line and musashi straight-up fought a baby
He would’ve killed that baby. Musashi’s hands are rated E for everyone. lol
@@mr.goblin6039for three easy payments of free.99, you too can catch these hands 😂😂😂
@@mr.goblin6039 Stop! 😂
The Genie thing is giving me Hot Daga vibes...
If this somehow spawns a Hot Daga spin-off, I will be so happy and Ryan will be so mad.
oh wOW
ngl musashi seems like the kind of guy who'd have a 'who can walk faster on the sidewalk' mental competitions with strangers on the street and then really get into it and congratulate himself when he won
In this episode: Ryan is bitter about losing, the Professor rubs it in.
Every episode
Did you mean: in every episode except one
can i just say that one of my favourite things about this show is that they dont just do american history? like, they do america and asia and africa and things that i learnt at school (as a brit). i just think its cool bc we dont rly get to hear about much that happens outside europe in my school
right? i'm from south america and it's so fun to learn about other places, if it was only history from the united states i wouldn't watch
You know, the entire thing of him murdering someone at 13 years old and then deciding swordfighting was the life for him makes me think it was more about being a murderer than a samurai
yeah, kinda interesting how they keep repeating that he literally slaughtered a child and they're just like ':) what a badass' like uhh...
They did accept a duel i mean he couldnt run or do anything else. If you think hes a murderer then everyone who fought in wars are murderers as well by ur logic. If you were in a war and there was a child there that had volunteered and had a gun ur not just going to die and accept that.
Professor called him a serial killer at one point.
@@StonerOfGotham difference is they accepted the possibility of death by having the duel
@@andrewliu8048
"If you think hes a murderer then everyone who fought in wars are murderers as well by ur logic." Yes...they are.
My kid has started watching these with me, and when this came out he had just gotten a 'magic board', so he spent the episode answering along with Ryan and Garrick. (Also he loves The Professor)
awwww🥺
My heart
That's so cute! You should buy him some jellybeans too 💕
So your little kid is like...I answer B, I think the samurai murdered his master :-/
@@juicysatsumabeauty i mean, i've read much worse as a child
1 - did Shane did just a duet with himself?! MASTERFUL!
2 - I demand the return of Puppet Garrick!
The Professor and Garrick the research assistant
Important detail is that kojiro used a longer than normal katana, which is why Musashi used the oar, as kojiro was used to having the reach advantage, so Musashi made his oar slightly longer giving him the win
“I didn’t know there was a samurai hiring service”
my brain: *HIRE A SAMURAI*
How else do you keep your crap safe from criminals
Correction: Rick important people hired samurai. Poor people who could not afford to hire samurai did not hire samurai
_it's the sunrise kingdom_
I'm pretty sure ryan tried to reference in judging from the look on his face
THATX WHAT U WAS THINKING OMGG
You know the professor is *one of those teachers* cause he’s trying to connect with his students via sports
The professor knowing nothing about basketball is a mood
Percy Rios indeed
I can relate 😂 lmao
His story sounds like if a new person started playing an rpg board game and kept getting super high rolls lol.
i didn't think i'd be seeing gay oars in this week's history lesson, but i stan
i mean.. how can you tell they’re both the same gender?💀
Lynnie how can you tell their not?
YES I ALSO STAN
A yes the racoon My ancient enemy well i can’t lmao i’m just saying lol i stan either way
one more oar and they could've had an oar-gie
The story, the song, the puppet plotwist ending, bodyslamed racist. I don't know which part of this episode is my favorite
Same dude same 🤣🤣🤣
Come on it has to be the bodyslammed racist
@@corvcrawler hell yeah... What on earth was I thinking?
Ryan's life story is like a back story of a villain or vigilante
sadpeepol :v Totally a vigilante
The oar song is unfairly good and so is this entire lesson. 10/10 loved it.
No one is talking about how cute The Professor’s face looks in the thumbnail 🥺🥺🥺
But that’s all the thumbnails
I think The Professor uses face tune or something lol he looks great in all of the thumbnails
hay hay the oreo master
Nah, that’s just him✨
What are you talking about...
HE IS ALWAYS CUTE!
and wise!
and magnificent!
Me: realizes that Shane has to send the winner's prize ahead of time, so of course the guest is always gonna win
Also me: roots for Ryan
They say the sound people outside the guest’s house are having cups so they can give one any time. But I also think Ryan will never win lol
Same
One day, the answer's gonna be a genie in some strange historic way.
I want someone to choose the genie answer just for the hell of it, so we can all see what happens.
‘Who helped the Egyptians build the pyramids of giza? Was it,
a. Slaves
b. Aliens or
C. The genie
The oar duet was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever been blessed to see and hear.
THIS IS THE BEST SONG IN THE WHOLE SERIES HANDS DOWN
I KNOW! I started stimming so hard. I think it’s the most beautiful duet I’ve ever heard/seen
I just started the episode, and you just made me hella excited😂
I think this one or the propeller are the best songs
This one’s up there with god’s song for me. I love it so much.
Oar is it? ..... I'll see myself out
Ryan’s fight story is so hilarious but also very sad
Garrick and Ryan are vibing so well on wholesome bro activities and Shane (professor) was like "Can't relate! I'm an esoteric gremlin."
“I mean, I know he’s a serial killer, but I kinda wish he was my dad.”
“Well, for the right price he could be.”
These two are so casually unhinged, I love it 🤣
I love the backgroud characters holding a sign that says "Why are these signs in English?" while one of the most wild stories I've ever heard was happening
the caramel candies popping up over the professor’s head when they’re talking about Carmelo Anthony oh my god
Ryan never wins because the professor wants to save him from the fate of being a puppet
it’s... so clear now...
I did a lot of research on musashi back in middle school. I read his equivalent of "the art of war" and it carried me through my middleschool/highschool wrestling career. I remember shaving the bark off of branches and making "swords" with the neighborhood kids and we would have little duels.
“Ryan, thanks for trying” should be the show’s slogan at this point... I’d wear it on a t- shirt
Idk why it took me so long to realize that The Professor had actual hands and not just fuzzy stubs.
I think it’s to listen the the show and the crew (producers and what not)
I love how in every episode, Ryan reveals a tiny bit more about his life. It's like we're slowly unlocking his backstory one anecdote at a time...
It’s like an anime
Ok Shane said "gay rights for oars" and Ryan made a reference to The Office and basketball multiple times. *I'M LIVING*
How great would it be to have Puppet Garrick as The Professor’s TA next season?? I’d love it.
And I was really looking forward to seeing Garrick on this show bc he was fantastic on Ruining History, and he was as awesome here as I was hoping.
He's so pleasant! Love him!!
Yes!! Garrick and Kate are the best guests on the show
+
Oh my god the idea of Garrick being involved full time!!!! The Professor having TAs! I don’t even know how that would work but I want it.
Helen so they could do it like he pops in at the beginning and is like oh I’m a TA now I’m going to be grading papers/taking tally’s, he could have a little screen where he pops up and introduces the musical guest and helps with outros
He could maybe also pop up and do a little call and be like hey I just found this fun fact about this part of the episode
That way he doesn’t have to be physically there in the theater and it ties in with the online PU of video calls etc
Miyamoto Mushashi will forever be the closest thing we've ever had to a real life anime character.
I mean Son Goku (Sung Wukong) never actually might have existed. So i have to agree.
There was a South American native Chief who caused such problems for the Spanish, that when they caught him, they cut off both his hands and set him free; as if to say, "He's no threat now"; only to have him fit knives to the ends of his stumps and make a come back!
@@ieatpeopleand Dororo!
Mans was doing side quests in the middle of a main quest lmaoo
Welp. They made em into an anime in Fate
My mom said that samurais were “very sexist” and the edo period was terrible for women. I havent fact checked her but we do descend from a samurai so the call is coming from inside the house if you know what I mean. On a positive note, I also heard samurais were hella gay.
If I remember it rightly, samurai found it weird not to have sex with men/not be bisexual
the dude never sired his own kids and instead chose to buy them is a big sign that homeboy wasn't into coochie
Natalie Rubilar i’m losing my mind over this comment, thank you for giving me a good chuckle
Natalie Rubilar
He could’ve been ace/aro
Natalie Rubilar loterally laughed out loud 😂😂😂😂
This episode is honestly my favourite among all 5 seasons. This is peak comedy at its most absurd level. Honestly, the GOAT when it comes to Puppet History. It's a close tie between this, the Isaac Newton episode with Keith, and the Jose Rizal episode.