Thanks for amazing advices..:) I really needed to learn these tips for my healthy relationship! "To trust others, we need to trust ourselves first. To change others, we need to change ourselves by forgiving ourselves and healing our past trauma." 1. Understand your current partner is not your ex 2. Get clear on what you want and what don't want 3. Think before you react 4. Expectations are the root of disappointment 5. Fix you before thinking you can fix someone else 6. Forgive and heal (You are the only person who can master your weakness and heal trauma so that you can make difference in the future) 7. You are not who you were yesterday (Believe we are all able to learn from past mistakes and grow up) 8. Date yourself (Know who you are first before getting to know others) 9. Understand with compassion (Your partner is a mirror of your personal growth) 10. Do the work! (Learning is meaningless without practicing)
I like what you've said in your video. I will definitely take this on board. I'm working on trying to get my first house. It's something that I wanted to have for years. I will get it, I will not give up on it. My dating life has been a mixed bag but I'm working on my own goals and then one day maybe I will meet the right woman. All the women I've dated has taught me something and though I got my heart broken along the way, I've not changed. I've only become stronger emotionally. Thank you for your tips and I'm going to do my best to overcome my trust issues in women.
From a lifetime of experience, in which I have known women from many different cultures and of all races, I have learned one unequivocal certainty; women can never be trusted. Men know this but will seldom say it out loud. I did not always subscribe to this idea and in my twenties I was indeed prepared to trust a woman implicitly. Now, at sixty-five, I can never be trusting; always on guard and ever vigilant. Many may perceive this as bitterness but I prefer to think of it as prudence.
Tip 7... I really needed to hear that one. My parents had a tragic story and they told it all the time like victims, and that habit has imprinted on me and my siblings. I need to learn to tell the stories of overcoming problems rather than the negative stories of what happened to me or my family.
This was an amazing video I’m happy you were willing to share some personal experiences to get your point across. Being vulnerable isn’t a bad thing :)
I appreciate that you’re not saying to rush into a relationship. I’ve been hurt just like anyone else, and I’m sure i forgive but forgetting is stupid for me, all you do is set yourself up for getting caught slipping again, and I’m fine with growth but I only trust myself now. I have no choice.
Thank you so much, I am currently out of two of the most toxic relationships in my life and I have been healing myself for quite a time but I didn't know how exactly to overcome this trust issues, now I see I have mooooooore work to do, but anything for myself 💕 I miss dating myself so I'll be planning on that too, I'm so grateful, thank you. God bless you🌈🌻🍀🦀💕✨
Thanks again!! We all need this information. That's part of our societies problems nowadays it's that we don't have people who communicate enough and that's partly because people don't want to receive it.
My boyfriend has accused me of cheating on him from day one and we have argued for a full year over nonsense. I have been crazy about him the whole time, and have never even considered going out on him 1 time. We spent nearly 2 months apart and he came back and it was beautiful --for a few days and he just now accused me again because he thought he heard someone coughing in the background of my message. I am a loner. I am very isolated. There has never been anyone here --even when he was gone for 2 months, no one was here. I still didn't go out with anyone- even after we broke up. Anyways, I just sent him your video, whether he chooses to watch it or not-- is on him. Thank you. This video was very well done, and I couldn't have said it better myself.
Apollonia I agree 💯 about the details of this. I'm not interested in getting together with anyone at present. The instant gratification only covers the open sores and you never heal or are you healthy. Thank you so much.
Such an amazing video. I have watched it four times! All of the content is applicable to me to some degree. Yes this revolves around trust issues, but to me, this is about personal development, awareness and clearing emotional baggage an knowing what you want in a relationship. Setting boundaries and using them as the framework for your relationship. I'm on a six month dating hiatus so I can not only work on these issues but my personal development as a whole so I can transform myself to the person that I want to be without any distraction. Then, as you said Apollonia, dating with intent.
I think "once a cheater always a cheater" isn't so much a matter of growth, but rather the simple fact that as a cheater that means you have a personality trait which allows you to willingly and knowingly hurt people you care about not to mention you hurt yourself to!, and secondarily allows you to rationalize the negative behavior into a positive idea. That is a mental issue, not a matter of growth.
Everyone needs to understand that human brain is wired to protect you. You witness things unfolding a certain way, uncommunicated crucial details, certain behavioral patterns that does not make sense. Sometimes it isn't always you. People are complex, very, very complex, but you need to gain courage and be honest. You don't need to pretend to be someone you are not. Just be honest at all times and trust the other person that you'll be accepted for exactly who you are.
My girlfriend lost trust in everyone. She was treated by everyone like shit since childhood. I love her. I don't understand what do I have to do to gain her complete trust.
Ms.Apollonia this video has really resignated with me because I do have trust issues and I am wanting to fix myself. I just had a bad break up or at least I think I have because I'm not sure if this is the woman for me or not. I would really like your advice because I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I have done exactly what you said. Jumping from relationship to relationship and I don't think I've dated myself long enough. I not sure what I'm doing anymore and you video have really stuck with me but this one takes the cake. I look forward and hope to hear from you. Aaron Taylor
Apollonia you're a doll and you give men very good advice. With that said, I just won't risk my heart to another woman in my life. I'm NOT marriage material for one and I don't really care now to try and understand a woman's emotions. I can and would be faithful though but there would have to be guarantees which I don't believe most women are willing to be. Fidelity or no relationship.
I truly love you! You are awesome! The mind is truly a beautiful thing and the heart of every person is pure Gold! We truly must remove the old dirt that has settled upon it. So that our souls can shine brightly through the windows of our eye's. Showing all those whom we are looking the love within. Truly! Every day is a New and Beautiful Day to make another step to all our dreams to coming true! Lol I laugh with love in my heart! Keep up the great work and may The Only One Above All continue to bless you! To me He is My God and in Him His Son Jesus my Lord and Savior. God Bless.
This video brings good to so many people and myself. Indeed I work on myself currently and see how much there is still to do. There have been first small successes. I appreciate and thank you.
Dude I feel so fucked. I thought I was doing better but I’ve had shitty trust for the last 10 years now and I can’t get rid of it. I don’t know what the fuck to do either.
Very interesting session, I have this problem, hope this video helps. But it's equally true that many girls are cheat addictive. I have seen that. But some are indeed loyal. Thank you Apollonia, wonderful lady.
Thank you apollonia,i don't really have trust issues but was in a relationship with a younger woman and i think she cheated,i got over that i am not a person That is thin skinned but i am easy going i Try to fix her ,i really tried, but you can't fix an other person as you though us men ,i really admire you appollonia ponti As person and a coach you ausome
This is exactly what happened back in junior year when I get a break up cause I thought she was like my ex friend girl. It happened to my last relationship in senior year(it was when I wasn't being myself). Same as friendship I tried to make as many friends as I could but I ended up isolated myself from them because I feel like they going to act like the same person who wasn't my friend back in freshmen year. Right now I built some of it especially a friend that I'm close to in church. I'm going to a college down at Florida and I'm hoping it won't be the same just like it happened before.
This is one of the most powerful videos you have ever uploaded. So much so, this is the first time I’m commenting on a video, despite the fact that previously uploads have helped me out so much.
I always admire your work and messages you try to pour out for us men. However, I slightly disagree to your statement " once a cheater is not always a cheater" . Us humans, we don't do anything just once, the pattern always eventually repeats. There may be few chances that cheater learned a lesson because they had to go through terrible trauma of their actions and they internalized it or learnt from it. However most of the time once a cheater is most likely a cheater.
Agree, it is posible to change, but it requieres near herculean effort, cheaters will always have that go to instinct specially when things get difficult
Ah exactly what I thought.. few few of them would probably change, but mostly will not. And it is better to be safe and stay away from that kind of people, or be that kind of people..
What happens if you fell for the wrong woman and now you can’t forget her? And have Oneitis now?I am trying to move on, but still always think about her.
In the same circumstance. I am dating a lady who is always dwelling on her past and what she went through years back. I was her first guy she fell in love with but broke up with her. We working on coming back but she every time she says, she is not ready. Sometimes I feel like I am dating myself.
Been in a 5 yr relationship with a woman with trust issues. I had to end the relationship because nothing every changed for the better. (And yes, it was very hard to let go of her) Important point to remember YOU CAN'T FIX HER PROBLEMS FOR HER if she is not willing to learn from the past AND LET IT GO. She is probably scared in getting hurt again, but is not willing to let you go out of her fear she will never meet someone else like you. Don't let your personal happiness be the focal point on this woman. Try finding a social group using websites like MEETUP.COM and get out there and enjoy life. Who knows, you may meet someone better in one of these groups. Good Luck !!
You need to ask her what did she do wrong in that past relationship. See how fast she stop talking about what her ex did to her, because now she will have to expose herself for what she did wrong.
My significant other has been talking bad about me behind my back to his female friends. I went through his phone and saw the messages and now I’m having a hard time trusting anything he says. He says his words were out of anger but some of the messages were when we were on good terms (at least to me we were). I’m so confused on where to go from here...
I’m so sorry. I hope you’re not still in this situation but if you are, bring it up to them. If they make excuses call them out on it. Talk and try to fix it, give them a chance to fix it. If they don’t, try to distance yourself and eventually move on if nothing changes. No partner should talk bad about their s/o especially to the opposite sex, even when you’re on bad terms. I hope this helps 💖
Hi there my name is Gabriel I really appreciate your upload it made me see things differently in my relationship I love this woman with all my heart but I get in head with my trust issues and I start becoming negative and dark i don't want this i wanna be happy with her i understand relationships have ups and downs but i feel if i were to change we would become stronger together i would love a one on one interview with you i really do appreciate your video thank you so much I liked and made sure to subscribe.
When you say put in that work can you express specifically what that means and what do we do how do we go about putting in that work please explain practically
Nothing wrong with not trusting women. I have seen them still take from their husband in a divorce despite that woman having money. They take as much as they can during the divorce as if she was doing their husband a favor by being with him.
If there were a "universal law" which would prosecute anyone who cheats(betrayal) on another person thereby breaking their heart and causing emotional scars then that perpetrator would face "jail time" depending on how bad the damage was. Do you really think there would be trust issues anywhere in the world knowing the consequences? People would think twice before going into relationships with intent to deceive. I rest my case.
I really love my partner, I've been telling & trying to show her my love, but she's so unsecure & always think what if I leave her, what if I cheat, or she keep saying you may do this.today she told me that she doesn't trust any man and if I had brain I wouldn't be here with you. You all went thru something good & bad & I need some tips from you all, what am I suppose to do? How can I prove my love & faith ?
Wow ... she’s pretty much self sabotaging. Because I have/had trust issues I know u have to have boundaries but also talk to her but ultimately trust issues can also lie with in ourselves.... u can help her all u want but she has to wanna do the work on herself
I really need to work on my trust issues. Its affected my relationship and she tells that it hurts her when I doubt her. She’s not the problem its me. I need to work on it.
It's great to hear that you are starting to work on the issues that you feel are keeping you from being in a healthy relationship. If I can be of help, don't hesitate to contact me.
@@ApolloniaPonti This ones a bit complicated. But here goes nothing... I'm dealing with a perdicament that I believe could be easily resolved. My father and I have been living with each other on and off and on the same land at least in 2 different locations for most of my 28 years of life. I recently know I've messed up bad and I mean bad. I was going to throw out some trash which involved my piss jugs that I had since I was living in my travel trailer and didn't want to go outside at night to urinate being I had to put all my clothes on belt, walk outside in the poor weather multiple times a night due to health reasons. I also suffer from (not diagnosed yet) CPTSD from trauma related to jail guards and the system. I do at times hide from the world in my travel trailer so this also contributes to the piss jugs as I don't even want to go outside and I don't have water hooked up in my travel trailer yet... Now where it gets bad is my dad actually when I went to take that garbage out I had a few of my piss jugs in the basket where today on the Fourth of July he had to empty them out and then throw them away bring it to the dump and as you can tell already this is really sad. I talked to him today without even really seeing the severity of this until I got to my travel trailer and thought about what i had said. Being that "Oh gary when he was here he'd play these stupid games with you when you were the mouth that feeds" which was my cousin and his nephew that used to try and walk on him when he was being helped by my father. So this obviously looks like a poor attempt to excuse myself by comparison. And also I said that the garbage cans were full that's why I wasn't able to deal with it properly. And he said at least I could've emptied out the piss jugs but instead I left them there. He didn't even seem that angry it just looked like disgust as it should have. Not trying to excuse anything but the most underlying issue within myself that I've noticed is huge trust issues. Something I've been reluctant to fix. I believe that being in jail where they would force me into a restraint chair and I would urinate on myself cause I couldn't get to the hole in the ground (solitary confinement) they would then wreslte me to the floor and strip me of my clothes and then throw towels in there telling me I had to clean up my own urine if I wanted the padded clothes to be warm. That was only a very short explanation of what had all happened but this is what I've been faced with dealing with between being in there with them and the mental health professionals playing mind games with me so damn much. Now I feel as if when my father asks or tells me to do something it's in a controlling type of way and I'm unsure if it really is sometimes. But most of the time I feel like that's what's happening and I read too much into peoples facial expressions thinking they are laughing cause they got away with controlling me in some way. I've grown past a lot of this . but this for me seems to be my biggest... Hurtle in dealing with these easy to do every day things. And to make the situation worse. For some reasons I'm unsure about but he had his friend move in with him and his friends daughter. And now it feels to me like they are making a point to "Look were here in your space haha" by their body language etc. I've had this happen where my dad makes a point to tell me that even though the place is in his name that it's actually mine as soon as we get financially stable and he sells his other property blah blah. But I won't go into that. He tells everyone it's mine, he tells them it's mine. Then his friends or whatever will show up, right in the middle of me and... Him talking and then they'll stare at me and then sit down and he'll just start talking with them even though me and him were just there talking to each other. And I asked "Are we going to finish our conversation or?" He replies "no I'm talking with my friend right now" Of course I don't understand this. I do feel walked on. But I try to see where he's coming from as well I try to reason with all of it, and do my best but simply he's just exhausted at this point and just flat out disapointed. Dealing with all these things makes me wanna retract more and I've talked with him a few times now the best way I coujld without making him feel attacked in any way. Now I almost feel like the people around us now is out of spite for a few days before this all happened with the garbage I got angry with him. Telling him I can't help but to be that way when I feel pushed around Eventually speaking. I bottle it up instead of talking cause I don't know what else to do, then I explode. And this makes him angry probably cause he feels like he does nothing but help me. The whole picture is a little more complicated. So what do I do just suck it up and bend over when he demands I do things, or maybe I can talk to him after this blows over and ask if he could talk to me in a different way that helps me understand that it's ok. But then again that seems selfish even though it's not it's for the both of us. I'm still trying to figure out how to convey myself without him feeling attacked. I think I would need to just do things before he even asks that way this isn't even a possiblity. But I've had instances where people talk about things that happened the night before almost like they were watching me do them. So now I feel taken advantage of even when people might not even really be around. And that prevents me from even doing anything even in my own travel trailer cuz it feels like they are watching me or having me do something. Not sure what I can do to remedy all this and not feel controlled while keeping him happy so he doesn't get up and leave me high and dry and then I'm stuck in an even worse spot
Thank you Apollonia 👏. Your tip about that every day is a new day especially was really captivating for me. By the way, you look so smart and smart as always. You enable us to connect with you which is amazing. Allah bless you Apollonia.
if your singleness is good...relationship with other people it will be god...remember the most importing relationship in the world is with you...and combine with self-love....this tree combination they are most importing thing from our life...without this you will never ever have a good relationship with anyone, you will attract only shiet people and you will be used etc...
It's great that you offer this all for free. Thank you.
Lmao
Thanks for amazing advices..:) I really needed to learn these tips for my healthy relationship!
"To trust others, we need to trust ourselves first. To change others, we need to change ourselves by forgiving ourselves and healing our past trauma."
1. Understand your current partner is not your ex
2. Get clear on what you want and what don't want
3. Think before you react
4. Expectations are the root of disappointment
5. Fix you before thinking you can fix someone else
6. Forgive and heal (You are the only person who can master your weakness and heal trauma so that you can make difference in the future)
7. You are not who you were yesterday (Believe we are all able to learn from past mistakes and grow up)
8. Date yourself (Know who you are first before getting to know others)
9. Understand with compassion (Your partner is a mirror of your personal growth)
10. Do the work! (Learning is meaningless without practicing)
My lack of trust for women comes from observing multiple women. A lack of trust now is not so bad for nomore.
I like what you've said in your video. I will definitely take this on board. I'm working on trying to get my first house. It's something that I wanted to have for years. I will get it, I will not give up on it. My dating life has been a mixed bag but I'm working on my own goals and then one day maybe I will meet the right woman. All the women I've dated has taught me something and though I got my heart broken along the way, I've not changed. I've only become stronger emotionally. Thank you for your tips and I'm going to do my best to overcome my trust issues in women.
From a lifetime of experience, in which I have known women from many different cultures and of all races, I have learned one unequivocal certainty; women can never be trusted. Men know this but will seldom say it out loud. I did not always subscribe to this idea and in my twenties I was indeed prepared to trust a woman implicitly. Now, at sixty-five, I can never be trusting; always on guard and ever vigilant. Many may perceive this as bitterness but I prefer to think of it as prudence.
Mark Ford that is called wisdom. You have certainly learned from life experience.
I'm on the same page. It's terrible that we are unable to trust anyone these days
Tip 7...
I really needed to hear that one.
My parents had a tragic story and they told it all the time like victims, and that habit has imprinted on me and my siblings.
I need to learn to tell the stories of overcoming problems rather than the negative stories of what happened to me or my family.
This was an amazing video I’m happy you were willing to share some personal experiences to get your point across. Being vulnerable isn’t a bad thing :)
I appreciate that you’re not saying to rush into a relationship. I’ve been hurt just like anyone else, and I’m sure i forgive but forgetting is stupid for me, all you do is set yourself up for getting caught slipping again, and I’m fine with growth but I only trust myself now. I have no choice.
Thank you so much, I am currently out of two of the most toxic relationships in my life and I have been healing myself for quite a time but I didn't know how exactly to overcome this trust issues, now I see I have mooooooore work to do, but anything for myself 💕 I miss dating myself so I'll be planning on that too, I'm so grateful, thank you. God bless you🌈🌻🍀🦀💕✨
Stay strong and focused!
Thanks again!! We all need this information. That's part of our societies problems nowadays it's that we don't have people who communicate enough and that's partly because people don't want to receive it.
My boyfriend has accused me of cheating on him from day one and we have argued for a full year over nonsense. I have been crazy about him the whole time, and have never even considered going out on him 1 time.
We spent nearly 2 months apart and he came back and it was beautiful --for a few days and he just now accused me again because he thought he heard someone coughing in the background of my message. I am a loner. I am very isolated. There has never been anyone here --even when he was gone for 2 months, no one was here. I still didn't go out with anyone- even after we broke up.
Anyways, I just sent him your video, whether he chooses to watch it or not-- is on him.
Thank you. This video was very well done, and I couldn't have said it better myself.
I have a hard time and I’m in a relationship right now so I gotta over come my insecurities and gratitude
I believe in you and i m happy for you 💖
Just do it!!!
Believe me I know u just got to try ur hardest
Apollonia I agree 💯 about the details of this. I'm not interested in getting together with anyone at present. The instant gratification only covers the open sores and you never heal or are you healthy. Thank you so much.
Such an amazing video. I have watched it four times! All of the content is applicable to me to some degree. Yes this revolves around trust issues, but to me, this is about personal development, awareness and clearing emotional baggage an knowing what you want in a relationship. Setting boundaries and using them as the framework for your relationship. I'm on a six month dating hiatus so I can not only work on these issues but my personal development as a whole so I can transform myself to the person that I want to be without any distraction. Then, as you said Apollonia, dating with intent.
I could listen to you every day, your voice is smoothie
Thank you!
I think "once a cheater always a cheater" isn't so much a matter of growth, but rather the simple fact that as a cheater that means you have a personality trait which allows you to willingly and knowingly hurt people you care about not to mention you hurt yourself to!, and secondarily allows you to rationalize the negative behavior into a positive idea. That is a mental issue, not a matter of growth.
Gosh....Looking so fine this morning, ms ponti....
Everyone needs to understand that human brain is wired to protect you. You witness things unfolding a certain way, uncommunicated crucial details, certain behavioral patterns that does not make sense. Sometimes it isn't always you. People are complex, very, very complex, but you need to gain courage and be honest. You don't need to pretend to be someone you are not. Just be honest at all times and trust the other person that you'll be accepted for exactly who you are.
One of your all-time best videos full of humanity.
One of my favorite videos that you ve done ..So, articulate and professional ..You re beautiful in all aspects ..Keep up the good work
Love that I can feel your passion and authenticity. Thank you for this video.
Thankyou not only it helped me and made me smile it's made me feel alot better about what il be doing/thinking tomorrow and in the future
Thanks Appolonia, you got me in almost all areas.
My girlfriend lost trust in everyone. She was treated by everyone like shit since childhood. I love her. I don't understand what do I have to do to gain her complete trust.
Good chance you won't she has to learn it herself.?
One of your best videos Apollonia 👏👏👏
Omg this is what I needed thank you so much
Thank you so much for this coach ☺🧡 really need this
Thanks for being so candid, it’s courageous.
This is another best of the best videos. Thank you.
Ms.Apollonia this video has really resignated with me because I do have trust issues and I am wanting to fix myself. I just had a bad break up or at least I think I have because I'm not sure if this is the woman for me or not. I would really like your advice because I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I have done exactly what you said. Jumping from relationship to relationship and I don't think I've dated myself long enough. I not sure what I'm doing anymore and you video have really stuck with me but this one takes the cake. I look forward and hope to hear from you. Aaron Taylor
Apollonia you're a doll and you give men very good advice. With that said, I just won't risk my heart to another woman in my life. I'm NOT marriage material for one and I don't really care now to try and understand a woman's emotions. I can and would be faithful though but there would have to be guarantees which I don't believe most women are willing to be. Fidelity or no relationship.
Good morning Apollonia! Thank you for another amazing vid/advice.
I truly love you! You are awesome! The mind is truly a beautiful thing and the heart of every person is pure Gold! We truly must remove the old dirt that has settled upon it. So that our souls can shine brightly through the windows of our eye's. Showing all those whom we are looking the love within. Truly! Every day is a New and Beautiful Day to make another step to all our dreams to coming true! Lol I laugh with love in my heart! Keep up the great work and may The Only One Above All continue to bless you! To me He is My God and in Him His Son Jesus my Lord and Savior. God Bless.
This video brings good to so many people and myself.
Indeed I work on myself currently and see how much there is still to do. There have been first small successes.
I appreciate and thank you.
Lovely, solid thoughts!!
Thank you for making this video. Been need this video
Easier said than done, specially when trust issues come from childhood
Dude I feel so fucked. I thought I was doing better but I’ve had shitty trust for the last 10 years now and I can’t get rid of it. I don’t know what the fuck to do either.
The best video I have watched from you... wow
thank you!!! i needed this!!!
Powerful Apollonia.Beautiful you.....smiles
Very interesting session, I have this problem, hope this video helps. But it's equally true that many girls are cheat addictive. I have seen that. But some are indeed loyal. Thank you Apollonia, wonderful lady.
07:40 is the key to healing and power
Thank you for the wonderful advice, you are the best😊🙏
Always listening thank you for these tips
this what i need it to hear thank you..
Amazing vid as always! You inspired me to work on my youtube channel! Thanks
Thank you apollonia,i don't really have trust issues but was in a relationship with a younger woman and i think she cheated,i got over that i am not a person
That is thin skinned but i am easy going i
Try to fix her ,i really tried, but you can't fix an other person as you though us men ,i really admire you appollonia ponti
As person and a coach you ausome
This is exactly what happened back in junior year when I get a break up cause I thought she was like my ex friend girl. It happened to my last relationship in senior year(it was when I wasn't being myself). Same as friendship I tried to make as many friends as I could but I ended up isolated myself from them because I feel like they going to act like the same person who wasn't my friend back in freshmen year. Right now I built some of it especially a friend that I'm close to in church. I'm going to a college down at Florida and I'm hoping it won't be the same just like it happened before.
Great vid what do you mean by we must trust ourselves
Thank-you your words are really empowering!
That's real talk have love that needed this thank you video
This is one of the most powerful videos you have ever uploaded. So much so, this is the first time I’m commenting on a video, despite the fact that previously uploads have helped me out so much.
Thanks apollonia, woow,it's as if you know what I really need
I needed this thanks
Wow.... Okay, I got some serious work to do!
Thank you! Subscribed.
I always admire your work and messages you try to pour out for us men. However, I slightly disagree to your statement " once a cheater is not always a cheater" . Us humans, we don't do anything just once, the pattern always eventually repeats. There may be few chances that cheater learned a lesson because they had to go through terrible trauma of their actions and they internalized it or learnt from it. However most of the time once a cheater is most likely a cheater.
Agree, it is posible to change, but it requieres near herculean effort, cheaters will always have that go to instinct specially when things get difficult
Ah exactly what I thought.. few few of them would probably change, but mostly will not. And it is better to be safe and stay away from that kind of people, or be that kind of people..
Good Video , Apollonia Thank you .. always a word for thought ! lol
Apollonia you look beautifully natural and rich in your lesson plan today.
My ex accused me of not being trusting... she was sleeping with my best friend at the time she accused me of this. Seems I was correct😂
As always great video, love your, bye bye.
Amazing video thank you so much
Thank you!!!
I'm suffering from trust issues always then I found this vid huhu
What happens if you fell for the wrong woman and now you can’t forget her? And have Oneitis now?I am trying to move on, but still always think about her.
Thank you for this video.
Great Advice thank you
She never tried to understand me ...and also she cheated on me with another person in from my eyes .
IMHO, you can only fix yourself, not anyone else, that’s their job.
This helps thank u
Like what was said, helpful !! 🌞😃
In the same circumstance.
I am dating a lady who is always dwelling on her past and what she went through years back. I was her first guy she fell in love with but broke up with her. We working on coming back but she every time she says, she is not ready.
Sometimes I feel like I am dating myself.
Been in a 5 yr relationship with a woman with trust issues. I had to end the relationship because nothing every changed for the better. (And yes, it was very hard to let go of her) Important point to remember YOU CAN'T FIX HER PROBLEMS FOR HER if she is not willing to learn from the past AND LET IT GO. She is probably scared in getting hurt again, but is not willing to let you go out of her fear she will never meet someone else like you. Don't let your personal happiness be the focal point on this woman. Try finding a social group using websites like MEETUP.COM and get out there and enjoy life. Who knows, you may meet someone better in one of these groups. Good Luck !!
You need to ask her what did she do wrong in that past relationship. See how fast she stop talking about what her ex did to her, because now she will have to expose herself for what she did wrong.
I'm considering marrying myself. Way cheaper and no chance of divorce.
She'll never be able to trust you since you rejected her.
Kurtis Miller that’s the killer blow, always scrutinize what a woman says
My significant other has been talking bad about me behind my back to his female friends. I went through his phone and saw the messages and now I’m having a hard time trusting anything he says. He says his words were out of anger but some of the messages were when we were on good terms (at least to me we were). I’m so confused on where to go from here...
I’m so sorry. I hope you’re not still in this situation but if you are, bring it up to them. If they make excuses call them out on it. Talk and try to fix it, give them a chance to fix it. If they don’t, try to distance yourself and eventually move on if nothing changes. No partner should talk bad about their s/o especially to the opposite sex, even when you’re on bad terms. I hope this helps 💖
How do we work on our trust issues ?
Hi there my name is Gabriel I really appreciate your upload it made me see things differently in my relationship I love this woman with all my heart but I get in head with my trust issues and I start becoming negative and dark i don't want this i wanna be happy with her i understand relationships have ups and downs but i feel if i were to change we would become stronger together i would love a one on one interview with you i really do appreciate your video thank you so much I liked and made sure to subscribe.
You can't "fix someone else". Trust me
You are always amazing ,
How can I reach you for for one to one ad advice .
I hope you can let me know ,
Thanks
When you say put in that work can you express specifically what that means and what do we do how do we go about putting in that work please explain practically
Very good video
Thank you.
My psychiatrist says that's my biggest problem I don't trust women at all
Nothing wrong with not trusting women. I have seen them still take from their husband in a divorce despite that woman having money. They take as much as they can during the divorce as if she was doing their husband a favor by being with him.
Appolonia is one of the very few women I trust (for advice)
Why should you?
Trusting oneself is the first step.
Good advice. Most women can't trust themselves. She needs to be able to trust you.
Yeah my Ex got upset yesterday because I have lied for the second time. I regret it
If there were a "universal law" which would prosecute anyone who cheats(betrayal) on another person thereby breaking their heart and causing emotional scars then that perpetrator would face "jail time" depending on how bad the damage was. Do you really think there would be trust issues anywhere in the world knowing the consequences? People would think twice before going into relationships with intent to deceive. I rest my case.
It's just so difficult to trust ooo..
You're favorite color is blue ain't it? Btw love all the videos
I really love my partner, I've been telling & trying to show her my love, but she's so unsecure & always think what if I leave her, what if I cheat, or she keep saying you may do this.today she told me that she doesn't trust any man and if I had brain I wouldn't be here with you.
You all went thru something good & bad & I need some tips from you all, what am I suppose to do? How can I prove my love & faith ?
Wow ... she’s pretty much self sabotaging. Because I have/had trust issues I know u have to have boundaries but also talk to her but ultimately trust issues can also lie with in ourselves.... u can help her all u want but she has to wanna do the work on herself
My girl tells me all the time she won’t ever cheat and I believe her but i feel like she lying to me idk why I fully trust her but i just don’t know
Does that involve getting paid or compensated in some form? I mean you trust For A Benefit. You don't trust for no reason.
D video really taught me alot...so u are say no dating just take time to heal ryr????
Soooo, you're saying you're coming "straight outta Compton"? 😁 I'll walk myself out...
How do we fix ourselves how do w fix our trust issues ?
I really need to work on my trust issues. Its affected my relationship and she tells that it hurts her when I doubt her. She’s not the problem its me. I need to work on it.
It's great to hear that you are starting to work on the issues that you feel are keeping you from being in a healthy relationship. If I can be of help, don't hesitate to contact me.
@@ApolloniaPonti This ones a bit complicated. But here goes nothing... I'm dealing with a perdicament that I believe could be easily resolved. My father and I have been living with each other on and off and on the same land at least in 2 different locations for most of my 28 years of life. I recently know I've messed up bad and I mean bad. I was going to throw out some trash which involved my piss jugs that I had since I was living in my travel trailer and didn't want to go outside at night to urinate being I had to put all my clothes on belt, walk outside in the poor weather multiple times a night due to health reasons.
I also suffer from (not diagnosed yet) CPTSD from trauma related to jail guards and the system. I do at times hide from the world in my travel trailer so this also contributes to the piss jugs as I don't even want to go outside and I don't have water hooked up in my travel trailer yet...
Now where it gets bad is my dad actually when I went to take that garbage out I had a few of my piss jugs in the basket where today on the Fourth of July he had to empty them out and then throw them away bring it to the dump and as you can tell already this is really sad.
I talked to him today without even really seeing the severity of this until I got to my travel trailer and thought about what i had said. Being that "Oh gary when he was here he'd play these stupid games with you when you were the mouth that feeds" which was my cousin and his nephew that used to try and walk on him when he was being helped by my father. So this obviously looks like a poor attempt to excuse myself by comparison. And also I said that the garbage cans were full that's why I wasn't able to deal with it properly. And he said at least I could've emptied out the piss jugs but instead I left them there.
He didn't even seem that angry it just looked like disgust as it should have. Not trying to excuse anything but the most underlying issue within myself that I've noticed is huge trust issues. Something I've been reluctant to fix. I believe that being in jail where they would force me into a restraint chair and I would urinate on myself cause I couldn't get to the hole in the ground (solitary confinement) they would then wreslte me to the floor and strip me of my clothes and then throw towels in there telling me I had to clean up my own urine if I wanted the padded clothes to be warm.
That was only a very short explanation of what had all happened but this is what I've been faced with dealing with between being in there with them and the mental health professionals playing mind games with me so damn much. Now I feel as if when my father asks or tells me to do something it's in a controlling type of way and I'm unsure if it really is sometimes. But most of the time I feel like that's what's happening and I read too much into peoples facial expressions thinking they are laughing cause they got away with controlling me in some way. I've grown past a lot of this . but this for me seems to be my biggest...
Hurtle in dealing with these easy to do every day things. And to make the situation worse. For some reasons I'm unsure about but he had his friend move in with him and his friends daughter. And now it feels to me like they are making a point to "Look were here in your space haha" by their body language etc. I've had this happen where my dad makes a point to tell me that even though the place is in his name that it's actually mine as soon as we get financially stable and he sells his other property blah blah. But I won't go into that. He tells everyone it's mine, he tells them it's mine. Then his friends or whatever will show up, right in the middle of me and...
Him talking and then they'll stare at me and then sit down and he'll just start talking with them even though me and him were just there talking to each other. And I asked "Are we going to finish our conversation or?" He replies "no I'm talking with my friend right now"
Of course I don't understand this. I do feel walked on. But I try to see where he's coming from as well I try to reason with all of it, and do my best but simply he's just exhausted at this point and just flat out disapointed. Dealing with all these things makes me wanna retract more and I've talked with him a few times now the best way I coujld without making him feel attacked in any way. Now I almost feel like the people around us now is out of spite for a few days before this all happened with the garbage I got angry with him. Telling him I can't help but to be that way when I feel pushed around Eventually speaking. I bottle it up instead of talking cause I don't know what else to do, then I explode. And this makes him angry probably cause he feels like he does nothing but help me.
The whole picture is a little more complicated. So what do I do just suck it up and bend over when he demands I do things, or maybe I can talk to him after this blows over and ask if he could talk to me in a different way that helps me understand that it's ok. But then again that seems selfish even though it's not it's for the both of us. I'm still trying to figure out how to convey myself without him feeling attacked. I think I would need to just do things before he even asks that way this isn't even a possiblity. But I've had instances where people talk about things that happened the night before almost like they were watching me do them. So now I feel taken advantage of even when people might not even really be around. And that prevents me from even doing anything even in my own travel trailer cuz it feels like they are watching me or having me do something.
Not sure what I can do to remedy all this and not feel controlled while keeping him happy so he doesn't get up and leave me high and dry and then I'm stuck in an even worse spot
I want to do the work but how
Thank you Apollonia 👏. Your tip about that every day is a new day especially was really captivating for me.
By the way, you look so smart and smart as always. You enable us to connect with you which is amazing. Allah bless you Apollonia.
Thank you Apollonia! Brb, going to sell my kidney so that I can book a coaching session
True
Hi, I really want to communicate with you how can I do that
Best
Maybe if people would stop doing devilish things then the trust issues will stop.
if your singleness is good...relationship with other people it will be god...remember the most importing relationship in the world is with you...and combine with self-love....this tree combination they are most importing thing from our life...without this you will never ever have a good relationship with anyone, you will attract only shiet people and you will be used etc...
Okay so how the fuck do I fix myself? I’m so pissed off right now with myself regarding my lack of trust.