Dreading your job will lead to adrenal fatigue and illnesses. It nearly killed me, until I suffered a full nervous breakdown at work. Then chronic fatigue syndrome, depression and anxiety, detached retina... Leave if you possibly can!! It can kill you!
What was your job, Luann? Due to stress and anxiety in my job I started losing hair within 3 months of working the job that I hated. Can't get out as I don't have anything to replace it with. I also started having abnormal heart palpitations and insomnia, waking up at 2 am with work-related fears most days.
I love my job though but it's been so stressful that I ended up in the hospital. I'm proud of myself for going back to work but it's been really hard. I'm going to get counseling though. I didn't realize I was trying to control everything and was experiencing burn out. Then supervisors caught on and they tried to make things easier for me but then they gave me way more to do which caused the burn out. Once I went back upper management changed things but without him I'm worried it will go back to the same bs. I just don't want to quit because I love my profession and my co workers and disability is just not an option I talked to someone about getting disability and have to get a dr to sign off on it and they will only give me a month of disability that's just not enough time for me.
Here's the thing. While that is true, once you start repeating that in your mind you subconsciously begin to resent the company and your work performance will stagnate. You have to know the reality of company loyalty, or lack of it, but you also have to live like they'll give you the world if you do your part.
@Jon-hb6gx Jesus also said to do all things to the glory of God. Which means being the best employee you can be for no other reason than to be a great employee. Will it be reciprocated by the company? Maybe not, and that's fine. Sometimes yes, and that's just icing on the cake.
My Dad told me every day that I was trash and would amount to nothing. I grew up. I left home. I got married. I have a beautiful wife, 4 little boys, I make 6X what my Dad ever made, I have a very rewarding career and a family who loves me and who I love. It's possible to get past this. It's possible to let go of what people laid on you. Good luck, brother.
I was so worried this was going to end with “but, deep deep down, on some level, I still feel like the kid who’s ‘trash and will amount to nothing.’” Really glad it didnt, and that you’re able to revel in and enjoy how far you’ve come 💖
I am an RN. It's been 12 years. I still dread everyday. It was the worst decision I have ever made. I have nothing left. I can't even open my eyes on weekends because I cannot waste any energy. I have to conserve every ounce for another work week. I am a shell of myself now.
Is there anything else you're qualified to do with your experience? If being a phlebotomist saves your sanity by giving you better work hours (8 consistent morning hours, opposed to on-call or 3rd shift) and less stress, it's worth the pay cut.
That's awful. I'm in food service and we help others technically it's hospitality which is like a hospital because we are taking care of others. I read that in Will Guidara's book. But I used to be a caregiver and it was so hard some jobs I was all on my own. RN has gotta be one of the stressful jobs ever.
Please take care of yourself. I'm 39 and my 20's were the hardest time of my life. It has gotten better though and I have learned a lot of coping skills. Lean on your co workers if you have to not saying to blab about your life but a hello and a little side hug helps so much. I hope you have someone who could help you thru the hard times.
It’s never the job. It’s the people I work with, deal with, and my bosses. Along with the constant hurrah hurrah work culture imposed upon us and we have mandatory in person work retreats to constantly talk about our next year strategic goals and gloat about team accomplishments. It’s so draining.
I feel the same way. I like my direct manager but I dislike other managers and most coworkers. There is so much stupid nonsense.The movie Office Space was so close to reality. Pretty scary
I believe Delony took the wrong angle here. The underneath narrative isn't that this guy is "trying to cut off stability" and "trying to keep options open". It was a LEAP to say he is "bored of his wife". The narrative is that he doesn't see his work as meaningful. It's not about income, it's not about new exciting things, it's simply that this is a man who was built to lead, inspire and have impact, yet he's working jobs that amount to less than that.
Agree, I thought it was ridiculous to say he was bored of his wife and when the caller tried to speak he spoke over him cutting him off basically forcing the caller to agree with him..ridiculous!
Protect your mental health at all costs. Sometimes you just have to leave a job, just make sure you have something else lined up. Some jobs are just toxic.
I think one of the issues with most people disliking their job is that when deciding on a career, we typically choose based on what we're good at. That doesn't have anything to do with our authentic self expression. I am exactly like the caller and decided to start a business based on my self expression and years later, I still find it exciting and fascinating, even with the cringe moments. Good luck!
AMEN! AMEN! AMEN! We have to find our passion. Mine is art. I discovered that in my 40's. But now I know and I'm trying to live in my passion and give my artistic expression to others.
Try this to help with anxious thoughts. If you think “that was a stupid thing to do”, immediately stop that thought, before you even finish it, if possible, find a way to rephrase it. Try “ that wasn’t the best choice, but next time I will do better”. Don’t let yourself think I am dumb, stop and say I am smart but sometimes I make mistakes. You have to tailor it to your situation, but I find it tremendously helpful. And if there is something you need to face head on, just do it, get it over with. If the job is truly a part of the problem take steps to find another. If you are single and don’t have children, look for a completely new situation for a season, look for a caretaking job in exchange for a place to live, look for a religious community that allows people to take sabbatical there, do something radically different. Good luck.
Patrick, you are not alone brother. I feel the same way. I'm 38 yrs old and worked the same job since I graduated high school. I absolutely hate it but I'm thankful I made enough so my wife could homeschool our kids. I didn't go to college or further my education because I didn't feel like I was worth it. I told myself that. My dad is a good man but he lacked the qualities I needed as a kid. I always felt like I wasn't good enough and struggle with that. Be strong and trust God will lead you.
For me personally I had a series of office jobs that always turned out to be toxic work environments that I eventually had to quit because it was taking a toll on my health.
This hits home Majority of the office/accounting/finance jobs I left were because of toxic environment. I wasn't into the politics, or the daily BS from nonsense managers or toxic situations that nobody wanted to address or fix
@@LeedawG766 IT jobs are not toxic but stressful and full of anxiety, so I would add that to your list. I started losing my hair and having health issues because of IT work, I just want to be a data encoder now or a truck driver to get away from stress and anxiety. My mental health is suffering...
That may depend on what you do or how you believe your work is impacting others. There are teachers, doctors, police, and nurses who love what they do. Personally, I wouldn't want my kid to have teachers who don't love what they do. I also wouldn't want to be taken care of by a nurse or doctor who disliked or hated their job.
@@todd2324 I am a nurse it was amazing to give cpr and see someone come back BUT there're horrible things that o along with the job and nasty pts that will tell me how they will sue me ect... there are negative with every job.
@@thorneto2742 I think when we say things like this the younger crowd thinks they have to find something they love or that should be the goal which seems unrealistic to me. Do you truly love every aspect? Is it irritating when a code doesn't work right do you have back issues from sitting all day are there times you wish you could be out more or around people. Just curious I know a developer that likes it but has complaints too.
@@elizabetha8565 loving my job doesn’t mean it’s perfect. There are challenges and things that could be better but that doesn’t get in the way of feeling fulfilled and feeling blessed that I have something I look forward to doing each day instead of dreading. I move around a lot during the day, I’m not just sitting at my desk typing all the time, and I’m very fit so back problems aren’t an issue for me. My hours are super flexible too. I literally wake up some days and I’m in a hurry to get down to my pc so that I can finish something I was working on the day before. I think the idea that you need to hate your job is just cope from people who are stuck in jobs they hate lol
I'm so glad I decided to click on this today -- 3:19 when you started describing how you used to basically mentally vilify your jobs/co-workers/over all workplace once you started to get that itch that you didn't want to be there anymore, I felt seen. "Making the grey super black and white" -- saaaame. It's like you make everyone and everything the bad guy so you can check out and not feel guilty for "saving yourself". Ouffff! This call was great! Lots to learn and great nuggets of wisdom, thank you!!
For the most part I like my job. However, every day I wish I didn’t have to go. I’d much prefer to stay home and be a homemaker. However, the thought of that makes me feel like my degree would go to waste😩 I also have no interest in spending time with my co workers. So many of them are immature or are two faced and that’s just not anyone I care to be Around. I need to hit the lotto already lol
If you actually had a deep desire to be a homemaker or atleast got to lean into what I consider a more spiritual walk and in service of those you hold most dear. Everything else in the world seems to be a waste without the connection I've had of my tribe, my loved ones of family and friends I cultivated from the ground up because I had none. A degree to have felt wasted of getting an education and lifting yourself, or the time and money you invested and your ROI on that? The jobs will always be an option, you can always pivot and see what works for you. But we getting older out here, and having had the experience of a really good woman in my life once upon a time. A life of just me as opposed to moving with a sense of "I will move mountains". Hhmm, it's a privelige.
How are you now? I am in this position you’ve been before. I dread going to work. Immature, two-faced coworkers, power tripping bosses blocking my chances for success, basically draining my energy
John. You’re not gonna read this but you are the only channel on UA-cam I will ignore my distain for religion to listen to. I’m older than 26 and not a man but this hit home in so many ways I was not expecting. Thank you for creating such honest conversations👏
Some years ago I worked in a construction job with my cousin’s ex who turned out to be a real abusive piece of trash. My biggest regret was not leaving that job sooner than I did. I spent almost two years in that job and it drained me of the will to live a normal life until I made the decision to leave that job for good. 8 years later, that’s still the best thing that ever happened to me.
This is the most powerful clip I’ve watched. I’m 35 and still like this. We’re amidst a housing crisis in Melbourne Australia. So everyone is jumping from left to right back to left thinking the grass is going to be greener on the other side. Everyone is extremely stressed. Much love from Melbourne Aus.
Could it be that he has not found his gift, AKA his passion? God gave us all a gift. Our job is to find out what it is and use it to serve others. I was in my 40's when I started coloring at work to pass the time on the graveyard shift and it awakened my passion for art. It is my gift. Unless I am making something with my hands and giving it to others, I cannot be joyful. I can be happy, but not joyful. What do you love doing in your spare time? What feeds your soul? What would you love to do for work, even if they didn't pay you? That is your gift. Find a way to use it and find true happiness. Don't talk yourself out of it.
The difference between how happy I am with my current job compared to my last job cannot be overstated. Your job might not make you happy but it can certainly make you miserable
I am 48, been in a job for the past 22 years. There is no room for advancement/promotion for me at this location. The enjoyment of the job is gone. At this point I am only still in it for the money, health care insurance, and retirement.
Thank you Dr John for calling out the people that debase others with that horrible term simp. Last time I looked marriage is between two people and what you do affects your spouse, therefore it is important to discuss major life plans and decisions with your partner.
ADHD. I disappointed everyone around me. Now at 49 I am no longer able to work. Just got divorced. Everything. I'm pretty much paralyzed with anxiety. Especially now with the state of the world, so much tension. It's inescapable. Completely overwhelmed.
Hey brother, I’m Sorry to hear about this suffering you’re going through. Jesus Christ gives us hope and everlasting peace. Get to Know Him through the Bible and go to a Bible believing Christian Church. Peace be with you man, God bless 🙏🏼 ❤
I can relate. I got back into it by doing little steps, today I’ll make a resume, tomorrow I’ll upload it to a few sites, next day I’ll apply. I got three interviews and got a job in about 6 weeks. It’s good to just formulate a game plan even though the anxiety is crippling. I feel much more secure now.
I am also not able to work a regular job. I think I have some ADHD but my symptoms are a lot better. You might good or grocery delivery to bring in income.
The guy thinks he's a loser, so he jumps around. No matter what job you do, you can talk yourself into thinking you're a loser. Famous actors. "I just pretend to be someone important." Teacher. "I couldn't cut it in the business world, so I hid here for safety." Businessman. "What real actual good has my life meant?" World famous athlete. "I was too dumb to get a real job, so I got punched in the face for a living " On and on. It's your mindset. You can collect garbage and beam with pride thinking about how you helped keep society cleaner and more sanitary so people could enjoy themselves. It's not the job. It's the attitude. Right now there is a famous person with millions in the bank and a list of acting credits still feeling like an imposter and a failure.
I had an emotionally abusive boss for several years. She was a different race and religion than me and I believe that was part of her prejudice. I couldn’t prove that and bullying is legal. I stayed at the job until I was so sick that I couldn’t really do the job anymore. I was so paranoid about my work that I redid I it over and over until I was exhausted. Eventually I quit because I couldn’t sleep and I was afraid of my boss. It took me 6 years to recover. I didn’t think I could work in that field again. After that I just worked at part time jobs. You can quit jobs too quickly, but you can stay too long. I stayed without getting any help and I was seriously mentally ill by the time I left.
As a former educator I can’t stand that his kindergarten teacher left that scar that has affected so much of his self esteem. Most of us teachers work hard to uplift our students. Please don’t ever let someone else tell you about yourself if they can’t even do basic kindness. What they do, speak volumes
12:47 this got me. I wish people knew how much their words play into a little child's self worth. If they had any clue, they'd be more careful. Many of us had parents who just either didn't know how to pour into us and delight in us OR they withheld it on purpose to make sure we never eclipsed them. 😢 I'm praying for you, caller 🙏🏻
Yes, especially with everything going on in the world lately. We’ve had nursing shortages in my city to an extreme because so many have been quitting. I can’t imagine the mental toll that would play on a person!
I have family and friends who do that and know how extremely stressful and tiresome it can be, but there are objective positives too - Its nice to have a job where you're essential, needed, helping others in real ways. Most jobs aren't like that. Its also nice to know you have job security for your entire life. Most professions don't have that guarantee. Even if you're fired or leave, everywhere needs nurses at all times. For your energy, I'd say if you can't career shift, try to set boundaries for overtime at first. They might scare you but remember how essential nurses are, they need to hold onto every one they have, you have some leverage there and options if they do let you go. At least try pushing that aspect. I'd also say become healthier so you can feel more capable and have more energy. Eating healthy, under your caloric baseline daily does wonders for body, mind, and sleep. I can get 4 hours of sleep and feel energized if I'm eating right and exercising (Of course you want more but you can get by with less). Sorry, not trying to preach to you, just saying from the outside in there are many desirable aspects to your situation others would love to have, and I know it comes with trade offs, but I think most things in life are like that.
@@thepunisherxxx6804 We are not essential, we are throw-away. If you’re not willing to tolerate the abuses, the oversights on care, the not following of state mandates on my license, if you don’t fit in the cliques, etc etc, you will be moving from one job to the next as you get terminated. I’m searching for my sixth job in three years with so much time off in between each job. Getting no-where essentially. And at each job, signing up for healthcare & dental, and vision care and never even getting to know the plan, let alone use it.
I chose to be an RN recently because it's a good mix of manual labor and computer work, it's basically all a career decision for me. I also live in northern MI with few opportunities or growing industries except for healthcare. I took too long to get my crap together to be a doctor (And I don't have the willingness or interest to get the grades to even get in to med school to be honest), don't really do well with the trades, hate math so don't have what it takes to be an engineer, accounting is boring, retail is dead end, don't have the social skills to sell anything, basically I've tried all the high paying industries and I realize that if you want to make above average money it's going to take great sacrifice, whether that's difficult, expensive schooling or working like a dog.
I don’t want to get in the habit of job hopping but I have a feeling I will once I leave this job I can’t stand. I’m surprised I haven’t checked myself out of this realm.
Job hopping is kinda the norm based on what I'm experiencing and seeing around me. Minimally relocation within the same industry just to get the pay increase you need. Hang in there
I enjoy the work I do, but it's not who I am. I find the lack of leadership in my group/unit, is what causes my anxiety. So I can only control me and nothing else.
So long as you are working for someone else, you will always experience burn out. You need to figure out how to become self employed. You will finally feel motivated.
@@Mjl449 I'm on my third buisness, now granted it's relatively successful, but I'm on my third buisness because I feel the same exact way. I'm still miserable and looking for a different thing.
Most people think the best thing to do is turn your passions into a job, because that way your job never feels like work. The problem is you’re turning your passion into work, so you’ll eventually stop enjoying your hobby as a hobby. It’s genuinely impossible to legit love work.
this caller and i are the same age and i struggled with this too. Dr. John is so right- being disciplined in other areas of my life definitely helped me so much with this personally.
I had 4 different work places in a short space of time. In the past three I genuinely tried to make things work until I just couldn't. The work was the same, but I did not fit in with the environment. By the time it got to applying for my 4th job I ignored what everyone said that I 'should' be doing and followed my gut, and I'm happy here. I disagree that you have to grind your way through a living situation or job situation that just isnt working out.
I can identify with this! I go in all enthusiastic then start to notice bits and pieces that frustrate me! So my changing moment was to find an organisation whose ethos I am really proud to be associated with. So for me I swapped working for a corporate company to a non profit. The actual work was very similar but I knew that my role was helping others. It felt so good to feel satisfied because I actually had a purpose. I felt I was truly contributing to the community not just getting a pay cheque. I have found a lot of non for profits have a kinder environment. People care and are not so competitive. Dont beat yourself up though, you certainly haven't failed or done something bad.
Great video. Dr. John dug deep into the caller's mind. It wasn't about the job, caller's spouse, finances, etc. It was about the caller's thought process. Dr John revealed what really was going on. Many of us can relate with the caller's situation.
Dang Patrick, I feel your struggle of job hopping and constantly changing careers. I have always hated work and always dreaded going into work. It doesn’t matter what job or career I had, I still hated every moment of having to show up to work. I was starting to lose hope in myself until I went to see a specialist, and found out that I was diagnosed with ADHD. My diagnosis explains so much of my issues, such as job hopping, short attention span, anxiety etc. After I started seeking treatment for my disability, I started getting a little better. Don’t get me wrong, I still hate working but it is tolerable. Do what makes you happy because your health is more important than any job in this world. I hope you find the help that you truly deserve.
My heart is with that guy's wife. I have the same issue at home (husband get tired of his jobs frequently) and it put great stress in our relationship, to the point I don't believe in him anymore. I hope he can improve himself in that way...
I’m 31 and this is 100% my life. Friends and family all around me have great stable careers and relationships and I just can’t ever make either work for longer than three months…
Leave the job. Your health and well being are more precious! It will be difficult but you will feel a sense of relief ❤ and you can find a different job where you'll be happier
It's a numbers game. Very few jobs allow workers to provide a helpful service to others and also pay well. Most of us fall through the cracks, working for one crappy company after another. Find a way to do your own thing on the side. Don't take your job too seriously. You're just there to make someone else rich. Pay your dues, build your skillset based on your abilities and interests, and enjoy your hobbies and family during your off time rather than stew away about the injustice of it all. This is the world of work. It's a numbers game. We can't all surmount that inherent problem. Live simply within your means. No debt + savings = freedom.
6 min. in & I'm in awe at a young man already knowing of one at 60 yrs in. How does that happen? The quicker we deal w/our crap the quicker others don't & life is "SWEET"! Keep being honest & open & lies will never fill us over blessings.
What a caring and loving man! I appreciate men who have the qualities of traditional men and are introspective with feelings at the same time like this caller. I want to hug him! He’s beautiful!
Wow I was praying that someone would ask this question. Finally! Its really an identity issue...that insatiable need to be validated. I remember being happier with a job that paid far less..but I wanted more..thinking it would make me feel better about myself. I made my job, my god..forever chasing security..I so identify with this caller
Wow, I would NOT have guess the direction the conversation went just by reading the headline. I'm so glad I listened! Thank you Dr. Delony for getting to the root of the issue, and thanks for advocating for the family. I hear my estranged husband in this young man... always looking for the next best thing to meet the needs that only our Creator can fill. Please pray for my husband to get to the end of himself just like this young man did in this call. That's where he will find Jesus.
I found this video over a month ago. It took me that long to listen to this call because I was afraid to hear what I know I needed to hear. I use to be a rockstar worker, I use to enjoy work but my last job destroyed me and my partner and father of my daughter stomped on what was left. My ex couldn’t keep a job to save his life and it drove me insane. Now I feel no better than him, I have a new job but I have no drive. I’m a top performer but I’m about to lose my job due to taking too many days off. I’m struggling with knowing what’s right and what’s easy (at the moment.) John is right, I’m having an identity crisis, I’ve lost my sense of self and I can’t do this anymore. Thank you Dr. John, I know you weren’t talking to me but I needed to hear this too.
I’m going through this EXACT same thing at 29 years old.. still don’t know what I’m doing and I hate my jobs. I have 2 jobs and I’m sick and tired of not knowing what it is that I want to do.
Job is a need, make sure you needs are fulfilled. Do something on top of your job that makes you happy. In life financially stability is very important so keeping a job until you find something better that will make slightly happier is the way to go. Keep doing it until find try happiness.
It’s not just work-it can be ANYTHING, including relationships, locations, homes, objects…you name it! The OBJECTIVE in life is to always CHALLENGE yourself, and to be in situations that allow for growth & evolution. For people who don’t get bored with SAMENESS, they’re wired for security and familiarity with everything. If that doesn’t describe YOU, then either build into your plans the ability to keep growing, or just anticipate that you’ll want to move on in a short while. Also note that wanting constant change isn’t necessarily a bad thing-think about serial entrepreneurs-once they’re done problem-solving for one project/venture, they get the itch to move onto another one, preferably presenting a new challenge that’ll get their creative juices flowing.
I had this bad right away when I finished school. I just hated it so much, 6 years later I semi retired. My husband was the same way, he’s a stay at home dad now. We’re both way happier.
I think I may have it as well but unsure about how to get an actual diagnosis. can a regular doctor help? or do I need to see a mental health professional?
I have level one autism and adhd. I have night mares about math because of my 5th grade teacher. Its not dumb to remember something your kinder garten teacher said. The stupidest things get planted into us with the strongest memories and we make it who we are.
After my divorce, and not having worked virtually my whole marriage, I was thrown into the world of finding a job and trying to figure out what I wanted to do with the skills I have (which aren’t money making skills in the market). I found that I just really enjoy helping others. I got a job caregiving for seniors, and I don’t make much, but I don’t dread it. I think if you find your skill, something that you’re good at, then you’ll feel better about your work.
I felt like this particular video and messege was speaking directly to me! Ive been in the same spot as Patrick and just cant seem to find ANYTHING (job wise) that fullfills me and i never once thought about how it makes my wife feels.Dr.John you have a new subscriber! Never seen your show until tonight.Dude love the rock gear! Social Distortion rocks!
2:57 I think also a lot of people are worried about what they're going to be doing for the rest of their life! They look at that job and they're like no I can't do this for 25 years so they move on. They desperately don't want to be miserable for as long as it takes until they retire
I was in that situation with my previous job I had before my current one. I was there for almost 3 years, miserable everyday. I was in the mortgage industry and finally just hit me “is this what I’m going to be doing for the rest of my life? This was not my dream career!” I quit, made my dream come true by now working in the fashion industry. I love my job!
Even if you like what you do it is work which means it's toil. To quote the princess "Life is pain highness, anyone who says otherwise is selling something". Having said that I don't think that means you have to be miserable. I think it's important to find work that you can on some level enjoy. But work will always be work. It will never be easy. You don't have to look forward to it. But there are things you can do to mentally avoid the dread
I’m being the same way now as far as jumping job to job constantly but I can see how Johns answer is unsatisfactory. I don’t feel at all like his description of ID issues. It’s that I was fired and took the next best job I could. I’m tryna return to the industry I was kicked out of and I’ve realized that’s for a finite time bc I gotta find something to do
I have been at my job for 24 years and I am feeling burned out. I never knew what I wanted to do and now I am at this point that I am scared to move on and feel like I am stuck here with my benefits.
I super identify with this guy and this video really resonated with me. I need to stop trying to make my purpose happen in work and focus on being indispensible while making my purpose cebtered in Christ.
Social Distortion album cover in background - I'm watching your show in still-gritty, Lynn Massachusetts, Mike Ness's hometown. I'm so old that I was a first wave punk rocker, just like Mike, and am still working at improving myself, and enjoy you and your show. Many thanks!
It’s very easy just don’t go to work. After a month, you realize you’re so financially behind is gonna take a whole year to catch up you love going to work after that.
I’m in pain. God gave me a wonderful gift, but it doesn’t allow me to provide for my family at the level my father did for me. So I work in sales and I’m REALLY good at it, but every day is a struggle. It’s pure misery.
Dreading your job will lead to adrenal fatigue and illnesses. It nearly killed me, until I suffered a full nervous breakdown at work. Then chronic fatigue syndrome, depression and anxiety, detached retina... Leave if you possibly can!! It can kill you!
Wow I'm glad you got out. I suffer from adrenal fatigue (sometimes) because of my hypothyroidism. Stress definitely brings it on
I agree if the job is stressful please leave you can stroke out it’s not work your health
What was your job, Luann? Due to stress and anxiety in my job I started losing hair within 3 months of working the job that I hated. Can't get out as I don't have anything to replace it with. I also started having abnormal heart palpitations and insomnia, waking up at 2 am with work-related fears most days.
Make sure to turn to God. The devil tends to use those traps to get us sick. We must pray and ask god to give us wisdom on where to go. 🙏
I love my job though but it's been so stressful that I ended up in the hospital. I'm proud of myself for going back to work but it's been really hard. I'm going to get counseling though. I didn't realize I was trying to control everything and was experiencing burn out. Then supervisors caught on and they tried to make things easier for me but then they gave me way more to do which caused the burn out. Once I went back upper management changed things but without him I'm worried it will go back to the same bs. I just don't want to quit because I love my profession and my co workers and disability is just not an option I talked to someone about getting disability and have to get a dr to sign off on it and they will only give me a month of disability that's just not enough time for me.
"The company went all in for you"... the company wouldn't bat an eye lid firing him.
There’s zero loyalty when it comes to employment and as little reward for your life’s blood as possible.
Especially FedEx
Here's the thing. While that is true, once you start repeating that in your mind you subconsciously begin to resent the company and your work performance will stagnate. You have to know the reality of company loyalty, or lack of it, but you also have to live like they'll give you the world if you do your part.
@@jeffr5552Nah bro, many of my mates tried that for years, sometimes decades, and to no avail. Give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar.
@Jon-hb6gx Jesus also said to do all things to the glory of God. Which means being the best employee you can be for no other reason than to be a great employee. Will it be reciprocated by the company? Maybe not, and that's fine. Sometimes yes, and that's just icing on the cake.
My Dad told me every day that I was trash and would amount to nothing.
I grew up. I left home. I got married. I have a beautiful wife, 4 little boys, I make 6X what my Dad ever made, I have a very rewarding career and a family who loves me and who I love. It's possible to get past this. It's possible to let go of what people laid on you. Good luck, brother.
I'm so glad!
I can relate to this. I'm working on my third kid. Lol
I was so worried this was going to end with “but, deep deep down, on some level, I still feel like the kid who’s ‘trash and will amount to nothing.’” Really glad it didnt, and that you’re able to revel in and enjoy how far you’ve come 💖
I love the fact that you fully acknowledge your success in life. So many people do the guilt thing as though they still believe they deserve nothing.
Your dad was projecting. I'm so sorry you went thru that I've had people say similar things it's awful.
I am an RN. It's been 12 years. I still dread everyday. It was the worst decision I have ever made. I have nothing left. I can't even open my eyes on weekends because I cannot waste any energy. I have to conserve every ounce for another work week. I am a shell of myself now.
Is there anything else you're qualified to do with your experience?
If being a phlebotomist saves your sanity by giving you better work hours (8 consistent morning hours, opposed to on-call or 3rd shift) and less stress, it's worth the pay cut.
😢 I understand
That's awful. I'm in food service and we help others technically it's hospitality which is like a hospital because we are taking care of others. I read that in Will Guidara's book. But I used to be a caregiver and it was so hard some jobs I was all on my own. RN has gotta be one of the stressful jobs ever.
😢😢😢
Praying for you.
I’m 22 and just entered the workforce and I’m definitely experiencing this.
Just entered?!
@@JustaBlueJay Well, my first “real” job. I have had part time work and internships but not a post grad job in my field.
🎼it’s only just begun…
@@JustaBlueJay Everybody has a different experience/backgroung even if it may seem odd to you.
Please take care of yourself. I'm 39 and my 20's were the hardest time of my life. It has gotten better though and I have learned a lot of coping skills. Lean on your co workers if you have to not saying to blab about your life but a hello and a little side hug helps so much. I hope you have someone who could help you thru the hard times.
It’s never the job. It’s the people I work with, deal with, and my bosses. Along with the constant hurrah hurrah work culture imposed upon us and we have mandatory in person work retreats to constantly talk about our next year strategic goals and gloat about team accomplishments. It’s so draining.
I feel the same way. I like my direct manager but I dislike other managers and most coworkers. There is so much stupid nonsense.The movie Office Space was so close to reality. Pretty scary
@@STMARTIN009same here. I accepted the job bc I liked my direct manager but can’t stand the rest of the team or the other manager I work with.
I believe Delony took the wrong angle here. The underneath narrative isn't that this guy is "trying to cut off stability" and "trying to keep options open". It was a LEAP to say he is "bored of his wife". The narrative is that he doesn't see his work as meaningful. It's not about income, it's not about new exciting things, it's simply that this is a man who was built to lead, inspire and have impact, yet he's working jobs that amount to less than that.
Omg you get it!
Exactly
Going through this rn didn’t even go to work last night I can’t work like this
@@Max-qk3xi get out of there man, no job is worth the stress.
Agree, I thought it was ridiculous to say he was bored of his wife and when the caller tried to speak he spoke over him cutting him off basically forcing the caller to agree with him..ridiculous!
Workers are treated like machines, no thought for your well-being, just an asset to make them money.
Protect your mental health at all costs. Sometimes you just have to leave a job, just make sure you have something else lined up. Some jobs are just toxic.
Well said 🙌
This was so needed right now. Man you are not alone on this struggle
Yeah I'm literally in the same boat. Zero purpose in my life.
I think one of the issues with most people disliking their job is that when deciding on a career, we typically choose based on what we're good at. That doesn't have anything to do with our authentic self expression. I am exactly like the caller and decided to start a business based on my self expression and years later, I still find it exciting and fascinating, even with the cringe moments. Good luck!
AMEN! AMEN! AMEN! We have to find our passion. Mine is art. I discovered that in my 40's. But now I know and I'm trying to live in my passion and give my artistic expression to others.
Perfect timing with this video, honestly feel the same about work and anxious about life all the time. Wish my brain could turn off.
Try this to help with anxious thoughts. If you think “that was a stupid thing to do”, immediately stop that thought, before you even finish it, if possible, find a way to rephrase it. Try “ that wasn’t the best choice, but next time I will do better”. Don’t let yourself think I am dumb, stop and say I am smart but sometimes I make mistakes. You have to tailor it to your situation, but I find it tremendously helpful. And if there is something you need to face head on, just do it, get it over with. If the job is truly a part of the problem take steps to find another. If you are single and don’t have children, look for a completely new situation for a season, look for a caretaking job in exchange for a place to live, look for a religious community that allows people to take sabbatical there, do something radically different. Good luck.
@@lilolmecj wonderfully said. Thank you Carole.
Patrick, you are not alone brother. I feel the same way. I'm 38 yrs old and worked the same job since I graduated high school. I absolutely hate it but I'm thankful I made enough so my wife could homeschool our kids. I didn't go to college or further my education because I didn't feel like I was worth it. I told myself that. My dad is a good man but he lacked the qualities I needed as a kid. I always felt like I wasn't good enough and struggle with that. Be strong and trust God will lead you.
For me personally I had a series of office jobs that always turned out to be toxic work environments that I eventually had to quit because it was taking a toll on my health.
This hits home
Majority of the office/accounting/finance jobs I left were because of toxic environment. I wasn't into the politics, or the daily BS from nonsense managers or toxic situations that nobody wanted to address or fix
@@LeedawG766 IT jobs are not toxic but stressful and full of anxiety, so I would add that to your list. I started losing my hair and having health issues because of IT work, I just want to be a data encoder now or a truck driver to get away from stress and anxiety. My mental health is suffering...
I was a janitor at an office job place and hated it it's a very toxic environment.
I’m in this boat now. What did you guys end up doing after quitting?
Yeah if you’re in your 20s and still living with someone
To me it is wild that anyone says they LOVE their job. I've had good jobs but never could say I love my job.
I’m a game developer working from home. I legitimately love my job lol
That may depend on what you do or how you believe your work is impacting others. There are teachers, doctors, police, and nurses who love what they do. Personally, I wouldn't want my kid to have teachers who don't love what they do. I also wouldn't want to be taken care of by a nurse or doctor who disliked or hated their job.
@@todd2324 I am a nurse it was amazing to give cpr and see someone come back BUT there're horrible things that o along with the job and nasty pts that will tell me how they will sue me ect... there are negative with every job.
@@thorneto2742 I think when we say things like this the younger crowd thinks they have to find something they love or that should be the goal which seems unrealistic to me. Do you truly love every aspect? Is it irritating when a code doesn't work right do you have back issues from sitting all day are there times you wish you could be out more or around people. Just curious I know a developer that likes it but has complaints too.
@@elizabetha8565 loving my job doesn’t mean it’s perfect. There are challenges and things that could be better but that doesn’t get in the way of feeling fulfilled and feeling blessed that I have something I look forward to doing each day instead of dreading. I move around a lot during the day, I’m not just sitting at my desk typing all the time, and I’m very fit so back problems aren’t an issue for me. My hours are super flexible too. I literally wake up some days and I’m in a hurry to get down to my pc so that I can finish something I was working on the day before. I think the idea that you need to hate your job is just cope from people who are stuck in jobs they hate lol
I'm so glad I decided to click on this today -- 3:19 when you started describing how you used to basically mentally vilify your jobs/co-workers/over all workplace once you started to get that itch that you didn't want to be there anymore, I felt seen. "Making the grey super black and white" -- saaaame. It's like you make everyone and everything the bad guy so you can check out and not feel guilty for "saving yourself". Ouffff! This call was great! Lots to learn and great nuggets of wisdom, thank you!!
For the most part I like my job. However, every day I wish I didn’t have to go. I’d much prefer to stay home and be a homemaker. However, the thought of that makes me feel like my degree would go to waste😩
I also have no interest in spending time with my co workers. So many of them are immature or are two faced and that’s just not anyone I care to be Around. I need to hit the lotto already lol
If you actually had a deep desire to be a homemaker or atleast got to lean into what I consider a more spiritual walk and in service of those you hold most dear. Everything else in the world seems to be a waste without the connection I've had of my tribe, my loved ones of family and friends I cultivated from the ground up because I had none. A degree to have felt wasted of getting an education and lifting yourself, or the time and money you invested and your ROI on that? The jobs will always be an option, you can always pivot and see what works for you. But we getting older out here, and having had the experience of a really good woman in my life once upon a time. A life of just me as opposed to moving with a sense of "I will move mountains". Hhmm, it's a privelige.
How are you now? I am in this position you’ve been before. I dread going to work. Immature, two-faced coworkers, power tripping bosses blocking my chances for success, basically draining my energy
John. You’re not gonna read this but you are the only channel on UA-cam I will ignore my distain for religion to listen to. I’m older than 26 and not a man but this hit home in so many ways I was not expecting. Thank you for creating such honest conversations👏
Exactly me too
Some years ago I worked in a construction job with my cousin’s ex who turned out to be a real abusive piece of trash. My biggest regret was not leaving that job sooner than I did. I spent almost two years in that job and it drained me of the will to live a normal life until I made the decision to leave that job for good. 8 years later, that’s still the best thing that ever happened to me.
This is the most powerful clip I’ve watched. I’m 35 and still like this. We’re amidst a housing crisis in Melbourne Australia. So everyone is jumping from left to right back to left thinking the grass is going to be greener on the other side.
Everyone is extremely stressed.
Much love from Melbourne Aus.
Could it be that he has not found his gift, AKA his passion? God gave us all a gift. Our job is to find out what it is and use it to serve others. I was in my 40's when I started coloring at work to pass the time on the graveyard shift and it awakened my passion for art. It is my gift. Unless I am making something with my hands and giving it to others, I cannot be joyful. I can be happy, but not joyful. What do you love doing in your spare time? What feeds your soul? What would you love to do for work, even if they didn't pay you? That is your gift. Find a way to use it and find true happiness. Don't talk yourself out of it.
100percent everything stated above!
It doesn't matter what title you have or what company you work for or how much you make. No job will ever make you happy.
A job can certainly help make you happy.
@@janelleg597 It's only temporary. Even if you have a great job you will eventually get used to it.
The difference between how happy I am with my current job compared to my last job cannot be overstated. Your job might not make you happy but it can certainly make you miserable
@FFS can I act for you guys? Serious question
My job makes me happy.
I am 48, been in a job for the past 22 years. There is no room for advancement/promotion for me at this location. The enjoyment of the job is gone. At this point I am only still in it for the money, health care insurance, and retirement.
43, same boat.
I am 44. Same here. Have been working at the job for 16 years
Ditto
Same here brother
Thank you Dr John for calling out the people that debase others with that horrible term simp. Last time I looked marriage is between two people and what you do affects your spouse, therefore it is important to discuss major life plans and decisions with your partner.
ADHD. I disappointed everyone around me. Now at 49 I am no longer able to work. Just got divorced. Everything. I'm pretty much paralyzed with anxiety. Especially now with the state of the world, so much tension. It's inescapable. Completely overwhelmed.
Am sorry for your situation...never give up!
🫂🫂🫂
Hey brother, I’m Sorry to hear about this suffering you’re going through. Jesus Christ gives us hope and everlasting peace. Get to Know Him through the Bible and go to a Bible believing Christian Church. Peace be with you man, God bless 🙏🏼 ❤
I can relate. I got back into it by doing little steps, today I’ll make a resume, tomorrow I’ll upload it to a few sites, next day I’ll apply. I got three interviews and got a job in about 6 weeks. It’s good to just formulate a game plan even though the anxiety is crippling. I feel much more secure now.
I am also not able to work a regular job. I think I have some ADHD but my symptoms are a lot better. You might good or grocery delivery to bring in income.
It’s about finding the balance of a job that is meaningful to you personal values to offset the bad parts
The guy thinks he's a loser, so he jumps around. No matter what job you do, you can talk yourself into thinking you're a loser.
Famous actors. "I just pretend to be someone important."
Teacher. "I couldn't cut it in the business world, so I hid here for safety."
Businessman. "What real actual good has my life meant?"
World famous athlete. "I was too dumb to get a real job, so I got punched in the face for a living "
On and on.
It's your mindset. You can collect garbage and beam with pride thinking about how you helped keep society cleaner and more sanitary so people could enjoy themselves.
It's not the job. It's the attitude.
Right now there is a famous person with millions in the bank and a list of acting credits still feeling like an imposter and a failure.
I had an emotionally abusive boss for several years. She was a different race and religion than me and I believe that was part of her prejudice. I couldn’t prove that and bullying is legal. I stayed at the job until I was so sick that I couldn’t really do the job anymore. I was so paranoid about my work that I redid I it over and over until I was exhausted. Eventually I quit because I couldn’t sleep and I was afraid of my boss. It took me 6 years to recover. I didn’t think I could work in that field again. After that I just worked at part time jobs. You can quit jobs too quickly, but you can stay too long. I stayed without getting any help and I was seriously mentally ill by the time I left.
Hearing Dr. John saying simp is actually hilarious but I love the message either way 😂♥️🫂
As a former educator I can’t stand that his kindergarten teacher left that scar that has affected so much of his self esteem. Most of us teachers work hard to uplift our students. Please don’t ever let someone else tell you about yourself if they can’t even do basic kindness. What they do, speak volumes
12:47 this got me. I wish people knew how much their words play into a little child's self worth. If they had any clue, they'd be more careful.
Many of us had parents who just either didn't know how to pour into us and delight in us OR they withheld it on purpose to make sure we never eclipsed them. 😢
I'm praying for you, caller 🙏🏻
If they knew they would, if they cared they'd have know.
And sometimes they are just repeating the parenting method they learned from their own parents. Even if it's bad.
I always wanted to be an RN since I was little.
I’m way past middle age now and still regret it. It’s toxic, abusive and dysfunctional on the daily.
Yes, especially with everything going on in the world lately. We’ve had nursing shortages in my city to an extreme because so many have been quitting. I can’t imagine the mental toll that would play on a person!
I have family and friends who do that and know how extremely stressful and tiresome it can be, but there are objective positives too - Its nice to have a job where you're essential, needed, helping others in real ways. Most jobs aren't like that. Its also nice to know you have job security for your entire life. Most professions don't have that guarantee. Even if you're fired or leave, everywhere needs nurses at all times.
For your energy, I'd say if you can't career shift, try to set boundaries for overtime at first. They might scare you but remember how essential nurses are, they need to hold onto every one they have, you have some leverage there and options if they do let you go. At least try pushing that aspect. I'd also say become healthier so you can feel more capable and have more energy. Eating healthy, under your caloric baseline daily does wonders for body, mind, and sleep. I can get 4 hours of sleep and feel energized if I'm eating right and exercising (Of course you want more but you can get by with less).
Sorry, not trying to preach to you, just saying from the outside in there are many desirable aspects to your situation others would love to have, and I know it comes with trade offs, but I think most things in life are like that.
@@thepunisherxxx6804 We are not essential, we are throw-away. If you’re not willing to tolerate the abuses, the oversights on care, the not following of state mandates on my license, if you don’t fit in the cliques, etc etc, you will be moving from one job to the next as you get terminated. I’m searching for my sixth job in three years with so much time off in between each job. Getting no-where essentially.
And at each job, signing up for healthcare & dental, and vision care and never even getting to know the plan, let alone use it.
I chose to be an RN recently because it's a good mix of manual labor and computer work, it's basically all a career decision for me. I also live in northern MI with few opportunities or growing industries except for healthcare. I took too long to get my crap together to be a doctor (And I don't have the willingness or interest to get the grades to even get in to med school to be honest), don't really do well with the trades, hate math so don't have what it takes to be an engineer, accounting is boring, retail is dead end, don't have the social skills to sell anything, basically I've tried all the high paying industries and I realize that if you want to make above average money it's going to take great sacrifice, whether that's difficult, expensive schooling or working like a dog.
@@tommygertcher2747 Enjoy.
I don’t want to get in the habit of job hopping but I have a feeling I will once I leave this job I can’t stand. I’m surprised I haven’t checked myself out of this realm.
Job hopping is kinda the norm based on what I'm experiencing and seeing around me. Minimally relocation within the same industry just to get the pay increase you need. Hang in there
I enjoy the work I do, but it's not who I am. I find the lack of leadership in my group/unit, is what causes my anxiety. So I can only control me and nothing else.
So long as you are working for someone else, you will always experience burn out. You need to figure out how to become self employed. You will finally feel motivated.
I’m self employed and burned out and hating it. Self employment isn’t always the answer.
@@Mjl449 I'm on my third buisness, now granted it's relatively successful, but I'm on my third buisness because I feel the same exact way. I'm still miserable and looking for a different thing.
I’m self employed and hit burnout years ago. Better than working for someone else granted but your statement is so not true.
Most people think the best thing to do is turn your passions into a job, because that way your job never feels like work. The problem is you’re turning your passion into work, so you’ll eventually stop enjoying your hobby as a hobby. It’s genuinely impossible to legit love work.
this caller and i are the same age and i struggled with this too. Dr. John is so right- being disciplined in other areas of my life definitely helped me so much with this personally.
I had 4 different work places in a short space of time. In the past three I genuinely tried to make things work until I just couldn't. The work was the same, but I did not fit in with the environment. By the time it got to applying for my 4th job I ignored what everyone said that I 'should' be doing and followed my gut, and I'm happy here.
I disagree that you have to grind your way through a living situation or job situation that just isnt working out.
I quit a job on my 3rd day with a 6 figure salary due to stress and anxiety...
It’s beautiful to see a man express his emotions and speak about his authentic experiences. I hope he found help, we can’t always do it alone ❤
I can identify with this! I go in all enthusiastic then start to notice bits and pieces that frustrate me! So my changing moment was to find an organisation whose ethos I am really proud to be associated with. So for me I swapped working for a corporate company to a non profit. The actual work was very similar but I knew that my role was helping others. It felt so good to feel satisfied because I actually had a purpose. I felt I was truly contributing to the community not just getting a pay cheque. I have found a lot of non for profits have a kinder environment. People care and are not so competitive. Dont beat yourself up though, you certainly haven't failed or done something bad.
Great video. Dr. John dug deep into the caller's mind. It wasn't about the job, caller's spouse, finances, etc. It was about the caller's thought process. Dr John revealed what really was going on. Many of us can relate with the caller's situation.
Dang Patrick, I feel your struggle of job hopping and constantly changing careers. I have always hated work and always dreaded going into work. It doesn’t matter what job or career I had, I still hated every moment of having to show up to work. I was starting to lose hope in myself until I went to see a specialist, and found out that I was diagnosed with ADHD. My diagnosis explains so much of my issues, such as job hopping, short attention span, anxiety etc. After I started seeking treatment for my disability, I started getting a little better. Don’t get me wrong, I still hate working but it is tolerable. Do what makes you happy because your health is more important than any job in this world. I hope you find the help that you truly deserve.
My heart is with that guy's wife. I have the same issue at home (husband get tired of his jobs frequently) and it put great stress in our relationship, to the point I don't believe in him anymore. I hope he can improve himself in that way...
Update?
@@zacd7094 Separation, unfortunately... less because of work, but he became increasingly aggressive. I left before it became physical
Wow i lost my job today a job i hated but paid well. I needed to hear this I don't know what I am going to do
I’m 31 and this is 100% my life. Friends and family all around me have great stable careers and relationships and I just can’t ever make either work for longer than three months…
It may look that way on the outside. Most people are suffering on the inside.
Leave the job. Your health and well being are more precious! It will be difficult but you will feel a sense of relief ❤ and you can find a different job where you'll be happier
It's a numbers game. Very few jobs allow workers to provide a helpful service to others and also pay well. Most of us fall through the cracks, working for one crappy company after another. Find a way to do your own thing on the side. Don't take your job too seriously. You're just there to make someone else rich. Pay your dues, build your skillset based on your abilities and interests, and enjoy your hobbies and family during your off time rather than stew away about the injustice of it all. This is the world of work. It's a numbers game. We can't all surmount that inherent problem. Live simply within your means. No debt + savings = freedom.
Best ever. It is not about the job.
6 min. in & I'm in awe at a young man already knowing of one at 60 yrs in. How does that happen? The quicker we deal w/our crap the quicker others don't & life is "SWEET"! Keep being honest & open & lies will never fill us over blessings.
It’s called “work” for a reason. You aren’t supposed to love it. Don’t compromise your health and sanity but you need to have realistic expectations.
What a caring and loving man! I appreciate men who have the qualities of traditional men and are introspective with feelings at the same time like this caller. I want to hug him! He’s beautiful!
Going through this as well. I’m 26 as well. Thank you for this.
I usually think about what I'm doing after work while working. I'm completely checked out when I leave.
Wow I was praying that someone would ask this question. Finally! Its really an identity issue...that insatiable need to be validated. I remember being happier with a job that paid far less..but I wanted more..thinking it would make me feel better about myself. I made my job, my god..forever chasing security..I so identify with this caller
Wow, I would NOT have guess the direction the conversation went just by reading the headline. I'm so glad I listened! Thank you Dr. Delony for getting to the root of the issue, and thanks for advocating for the family. I hear my estranged husband in this young man... always looking for the next best thing to meet the needs that only our Creator can fill. Please pray for my husband to get to the end of himself just like this young man did in this call. That's where he will find Jesus.
I found this video over a month ago. It took me that long to listen to this call because I was afraid to hear what I know I needed to hear.
I use to be a rockstar worker, I use to enjoy work but my last job destroyed me and my partner and father of my daughter stomped on what was left. My ex couldn’t keep a job to save his life and it drove me insane.
Now I feel no better than him, I have a new job but I have no drive. I’m a top performer but I’m about to lose my job due to taking too many days off. I’m struggling with knowing what’s right and what’s easy (at the moment.)
John is right, I’m having an identity crisis, I’ve lost my sense of self and I can’t do this anymore.
Thank you Dr. John, I know you weren’t talking to me but I needed to hear this too.
Sick of it all shirt?!! Hell yeah 🤘🏼
I’m going through this EXACT same thing at 29 years old.. still don’t know what I’m doing and I hate my jobs. I have 2 jobs and I’m sick and tired of not knowing what it is that I want to do.
This literally sounds just like my current life. Glad I came upon this.
Damm this is pretty spot on first time watching wasn’t expecting this.
Job is a need, make sure you needs are fulfilled. Do something on top of your job that makes you happy. In life financially stability is very important so keeping a job until you find something better that will make slightly happier is the way to go. Keep doing it until find try happiness.
It’s not just work-it can be ANYTHING, including relationships, locations, homes, objects…you name it! The OBJECTIVE in life is to always CHALLENGE yourself, and to be in situations that allow for growth & evolution.
For people who don’t get bored with SAMENESS, they’re wired for security and familiarity with everything. If that doesn’t describe YOU, then either build into your plans the ability to keep growing, or just anticipate that you’ll want to move on in a short while.
Also note that wanting constant change isn’t necessarily a bad thing-think about serial entrepreneurs-once they’re done problem-solving for one project/venture, they get the itch to move onto another one, preferably presenting a new challenge that’ll get their creative juices flowing.
I understand where Dr John is coming from. But you still have to enjoy your job to some degree
I'm 27 and this feels so apt for me
I had this bad right away when I finished school. I just hated it so much, 6 years later I semi retired. My husband was the same way, he’s a stay at home dad now. We’re both way happier.
I have adhd, dr Delony has adhd, and I think this guy has it too amongst other causes. I loved this episode.
I think I may have it as well but unsure about how to get an actual diagnosis. can a regular doctor help? or do I need to see a mental health professional?
@@simplifinance5154 professional is the best choice. Also there are some online tests
This is absolutely on point! Wow!! I have the same issue.
In the same boat, I hate my current career field.... I dread every day I have to go in, but I am an adult and need to make money!
Glad I came across this call because I’m dealing with the same thing
I have level one autism and adhd. I have night mares about math because of my 5th grade teacher. Its not dumb to remember something your kinder garten teacher said. The stupidest things get planted into us with the strongest memories and we make it who we are.
All jobs suck. You’ll never be happy working for somebody else. Period.
Well that's definitely not true
After my divorce, and not having worked virtually my whole marriage, I was thrown into the world of finding a job and trying to figure out what I wanted to do with the skills I have (which aren’t money making skills in the market). I found that I just really enjoy helping others. I got a job caregiving for seniors, and I don’t make much, but I don’t dread it. I think if you find your skill, something that you’re good at, then you’ll feel better about your work.
Wow. First time listening and its exactly what i needed to hear. In same situation as this guy. Thank you John
This hit home. Thank you for the advice. Much love. God bless!
Wherever you go, there you are.
I worked for 33 years for a small company
I HATED EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY
the last month before I retired was the worst
Damn this one hits hard, hang in there brother, head eye, hope you’ve gotten stronger and bless up! God has a plan
Thanks John, spoken like a true employer.
This was so amazing to hear.. thanks for the perspective
12:17
"What's underneath that?"
"A lot of fear"
"Fear of what?"
"Not being good enough."
I felt that. I really did.
Me too😢
I felt like this particular video and messege was speaking directly to me! Ive been in the same spot as Patrick and just cant seem to find ANYTHING (job wise) that fullfills me and i never once thought about how it makes my wife feels.Dr.John you have a new subscriber! Never seen your show until tonight.Dude love the rock gear! Social Distortion rocks!
2:57 I think also a lot of people are worried about what they're going to be doing for the rest of their life! They look at that job and they're like no I can't do this for 25 years so they move on. They desperately don't want to be miserable for as long as it takes until they retire
I was in that situation with my previous job I had before my current one. I was there for almost 3 years, miserable everyday. I was in the mortgage industry and finally just hit me “is this what I’m going to be doing for the rest of my life? This was not my dream career!” I quit, made my dream come true by now working in the fashion industry. I love my job!
@@jjxrodriguez I love that for you!!
The way this episode resonated with me 😢
Thanks for this
Even if you like what you do it is work which means it's toil.
To quote the princess "Life is pain highness, anyone who says otherwise is selling something".
Having said that I don't think that means you have to be miserable. I think it's important to find work that you can on some level enjoy.
But work will always be work. It will never be easy. You don't have to look forward to it. But there are things you can do to mentally avoid the dread
This is so good. I needed this 😒
I’m being the same way now as far as jumping job to job constantly but I can see how Johns answer is unsatisfactory. I don’t feel at all like his description of ID issues. It’s that I was fired and took the next best job I could. I’m tryna return to the industry I was kicked out of and I’ve realized that’s for a finite time bc I gotta find something to do
I have been at my job for 24 years and I am feeling burned out. I never knew what I wanted to do and now I am at this point that I am scared to move on and feel like I am stuck here with my benefits.
I super identify with this guy and this video really resonated with me. I need to stop trying to make my purpose happen in work and focus on being indispensible while making my purpose cebtered in Christ.
Social Distortion album cover in background - I'm watching your show in still-gritty, Lynn Massachusetts, Mike Ness's hometown. I'm so old that I was a first wave punk rocker, just like Mike, and am still working at improving myself, and enjoy you and your show. Many thanks!
I wish I had listened to this talk at age 26. (I put way too much at my job at that time, & burned out by 30 when I should have put more into me.)
It’s very easy just don’t go to work. After a month, you realize you’re so financially behind is gonna take a whole year to catch up you love going to work after that.
Legends!! 1 for asking such an important question at early age. The other acknowledgement is to Dr John for every words n concerns expressed 🙌⚡️💯
As a teacher, this is a constant struggle. I'm finally at a school where I adore the students, but many of the adults drive me nuts.
Thanks Dr… is like you’re talking directly to me… and maybe many more other folks here. I appreciate your wisdom talks!
There are job everywhere. Update your resume, define your self brand. Go out there and kick ass.
I can relate to this 1000 percent 🙏🏽.
The “lonely” thing got me..
I’m crying. 👏
He’s young best thing to do is work for yourself!
I’m in pain. God gave me a wonderful gift, but it doesn’t allow me to provide for my family at the level my father did for me. So I work in sales and I’m REALLY good at it, but every day is a struggle. It’s pure misery.
Me too.. I am ashamed to have not found the courage to escape the mundane well-paying job