I always love sitting down with my family on the podcast. If you enjoyed this episode then I would be so grateful if you hit that subscribe button. Thank you!
I must confess that I stopped halfway into the video for calling my 20 years old son, who's living and studying abroad, just to say hello and listen to him. Thank you for this great conversation! 👏🏼👏🏻👏🏻
I am pregnant with our third, we’ve been together for 12 years. I love… LOVE these videos. Of a true family. Neither I nor my husband could experience this as kids so it gets sometimes challenging but I pray one day I will sit on a sofa like that with our 3 kids and talk and talk just like you guys. It’s really magical and in my opinion this is pure perfection and worth to live.
I cried listening to this because so many of us had emotionally unavailable parents and that has caused many issues for my sister and I. When you don't have that solid foundation, your kids suffer. Bravo to you and Chris for staying together, for being united for your kids, and for being honest. My father has lied our whole lives so trust is very hard to have within relationships. I thought my now ex husband was so wonderful and loyal, but ended up lying just like my dad and cheating. I've been working on myself ever since. 46 and 8+ years since divorce. I am healing from childhood all the way to now and I'm determined to not let my family's shit affect me, I'm flipping the switch. I chose a broken partner just like me and didn't know it, but as I move forward, I'm learning to love myself and stay true to the real me, and I will eventually find someone who has done the same. Happy Holidays to you all!
This is exactly how I am with my 3 teen boys. They are abnormally honest. My now 15 year old told me that strict parents create sneaky kids and it is so true. Just be honest and real and anything can be worked through.
I’ve got a great one that me and my family do… if someone is feeling bad we don’t automatically try to give advice we actaully ask: Do you want advice, do you want me to listen or do you just want me to leave … it’s something that will vary from time to time ❤
I don’t have kids, but this openess and genuine effort & growth through imperfection is what I would have appreciated growing up. Thanks for sharing, Robbins family!
This is such a profound conversation and an incredible gift. The one thing that made me sad was that, even though all of the children felt that having their parents cry at the dinner table was a good thing, Kendal kept referring to crying as a sign of weakness. Crying in response to frustration, suffering, pain, and even joy is actually quite a healthy response, a reflection of being in touch with one's lived experience and part of remaining resilient and strong. It is often a large part of regeneration and healing. Numbness and lack of any emotional response to difficulties or suffering is often a sign of disconnection and brittleness, which is, in the end, a far weaker state.
You raised great kids who are growing into well adjusted adults. "We will never punish you for something we did as kids." With someone who had a physically and emotionally abusive narcissistic father and a codependent mother who enabled him every step of the way I and so many others wish we had parents like you and Chris. Good parents make all the difference in their childern's life.
Sweet & inspirational Mel & family! As a single Momma of 2 boys & 3 step kids I always had this “ Mantra “ you tell me the truth NO PUNISHMENT & I KEPT my word!!! Beautiful & so relatable!!! Bravo Mel & Chris 💝💓💝
The best podcast. I learned so much. Yes, lots of regrets, but finally became vulnerable in order to let my daughter and son know 'the true me'. Your family is awesome! You as parents are a blessing to your listeners.. BRAVO! Thank you.
Wow Mel and Chris! You’ve raised great kids! Thank you for this podcast! I have a 2 and 7 year old and frequently I question if I’m doing it all wrong! Please do more of these!!
Thank you, Mel! Your family is amazing! I consider it a hats-off situation and a real accomplishment when your kids are the adults in a relationship and you, as a parent, do have the braveness to embrace whatever you did wrong and act to show you want to improve. This is what family is really about! Congrats to that!
I was blessed with amazing parents too. I was barely punished too. As long as I shared the truth with them, we were good. It made me want to share with my parents.
You wouldn’t be sitting down there, having this conversation if you and your husband weren’t in a loving and healthy relationship. I think that’s were everything begins, having a good and supporting partner who work together to achieve common goals.
Hi Mel. My kids are now 20 and 28. Our family worked a lot like yours. I saw myself as a guide rather than an authority figure. I would give them the information and allow them to make their own decisions. They trust me, because I would never go back on my word regarding their safety: I knew where they were and with whom. They called me when their designated drivers got drunk and I'd pick them up with no resentment, but rather pride in their maturity. Today, they're responsible adults with jobs, but we still love hanging out together ❤️ ❤
How to get your children to trust you and communicate with you when they’re older in my experience is by creating the foundation when they’re younger they can ask approach you with any question. Always answering their questions truthfully, not diverting the answers, not reacting wildly when they ask something uncomfortable, showing them very early on that you are a safe place to bring up any topic, and can let them talk through situations with you no matter what.
What a great episode! It is delightful to see and hear the love between you all ❤️ I had none of this growing up. My father never showed emotion, always the tough guy. He took little interest in my sisters and I when we were young. Mom was more concerned with her relationship with him than with us. There was little communication all the way around. One sister and I were high achievers and well-behaved because we feared dad's wrath. The youngest was a hellion and didn't care about anyone but herself. At 60, I'm finally addressing the issues from childhood that have impacted my entire life. Kudos to Mel & Chris for genuinely caring about their kids' development and raising such well adjusted young adults.
Lovely to see the closeness of your kids. My two sons are five years apart and I am bothered because they don’t seem close. Could be the age difference or male pride. They both speak to me, but I wish they would be closer. They are both mature so I am happy about that, but would love for them to be closer.
This was an awesome video. Super eye opening in general but especially for myself as a parent to 2 young boys. I'm trying so hard not to f*ck it up. Loved hearing the perspectives from each of you, especially Chris & Mel's kids. Mel, Thank you. You changed my life. Since taking the POY 2017 course, I've taken every single tool you provided and continued to practice using them. Sure, it hasn't all been smooth, I've fallen and I've fallen hard, but after those falls, I would remember that I have the ability to change it all, and I would get myself back on track. Completely changed how I live my life. Grateful for you!
Calling out the hypocrisy…the irony 😱 nicely done authentic fam! Gratitude 🙏🏽 for your transparency and authenticity!! Appreciate your craft, insight and knowledge! ❤❤
I like seeing you and your lucky family talking while having a good time. It is SO important to tell each family person good things about each person in the family because so much sad crap everywhere. But so many family distractions and divisions affects many. Young ones committing suicide scares me so much and it is so sad. I tell my adult children they are important, loved and life is full of ups and downs. Plus they can tell me ANYTHING as a parent. Have a happy holidays. Many love your podcasts and books!!
What an absolutely amazing family. It brings so much joy to my heart to see you with your husband and kids. I'm only 20 minutes in and I'm going to save this to watch it with my wife. Thank you. 🙏☮️💞
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for this video! I am a mom struggling with every thing you have discussed here. To hear this from the kids perspective was so eye opening and made me feel like I have a real chance at doing right by my kids. I love you Mel and am so glad that I found you. You have amazing kids who were clearly raised by amazing parents. I am so looking forward to more videos with your family ♥️♥️
This is the best episode ever! Thank you so much Robbins family! This episode is so helpful not just for family but also applicable for other type of relationships. Thanks again Mel! Happy Holidays to the whole fam! More blessings to you!
Mel I haven't listened to this yet, but I can't wait to later. It's been one of those crazy last day of school before Christmas break perfectly imperfect Mom mornings 😂❤️😂 that led to a lot of laughs and all the gifts getting out, cupcakes delivered in time for the school party(even in HS they just keep on going 😂)and work gifts in the car 😂. I am so happy to see you in this picture Mel so chill and relaxing with your beautiful family. ❤️There is no greater gift for a mom then to be making memories with her children especially at Christmas.🎄🎅⛄ Enjoy every minute beautiful Momma and make loads of precious memories.🫶✋ You are glowing and I couldn't be happier for you.😊💛 God bless the Robbins family. 🙏 Wishing you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy and Healthy 2023.🎄🎅⛄🎉
People need to understand that years of having this relationship is what has developed these healthy relationships but for those that are just starting to make changes… it takes time… and breaking old habits. But also let your kids know you are trying to make changes… actions have to match your words. But please know it may take the same amount of yours you haven’t been communicating. I have a healthy relationship with my daughter but we have built that over her entire life. But it’s never to late to change and creat what you want
What a telepathy! it came exact time that I need it. I had just little argument with my son today in the evening so it came. I hope it could help me to figure out how to tackle the situation onwards. Thank you Mel😊❤️ Always eger to listen you 🙏♥️😘🤗
I totally got a lot out of your open family gathering. I'm the other outside parent, from a divorce, to my 2 children. 19 and 21. I am actively communicating with my daughter, while my son 21 completely ignores me. I text, leaving messages of encouragement and my love for him.. Both actually. But for over 2 years he doesn't respond. I send him money for xmas via CApp and no ty. Just an example, bcuz that's not the point. It's heart wrenching not to be actively involved in his life. I do not push him. 😭 And my daughter and i are still working on our relationship. I am so proud of her for opening the door and working with me. Good advice in here.. Thank you all ❤
Cristinalz thank you for your comment. My son acts the same way..ignores me. It is weird thing but something with their generation. I would write my adult children once a month they live in differ states FL and VA. Both said for me to stop writing because they just throw my letters away. Boy did that hurt! So I stopped.
At age four, spend time with them. Play with them. That is communicating that you are interested in them. If possible don’t put them in daycare from early till late.
Mel, how do we fix the relationship with your adult children? Can we use these suggestions to FIX the relationship now or is it too late to build honest communication with your adult children
This was fun to listen to, thank you! I HAVE A QUESTION tho: Could you discuss the subject of "Woke" 20-somethings being offended constantly by their 80-something grandparents? This is a huge thing we're dealing with between our daughter and my parents, and I am NOT looking forward to Christmas. She is torn and has kept silent until recently when she told us this was bothering her this much. Her dad and I have discussed the differences between how people grew up, the why's and how's (my parents were both very young in the war in Germany and Race, Gender Issues, and well, they have a strong opinion on everything based on local news content and comments. Their comments and jokes are based on older times and experiences, and there is no intent on creating bad feelings or arguing with family. They're also very old and aren't going to change their minds, so why bother? We told daughter to consider all this and if she still feels she needs to speak up, speak up calmly and quietly. My parents would be crushed to hear our daughter is upset at them, or that they've done something wrong, but at the same time, they're 83yrs old and maybe it's no big deal to them. I've heard it so long (I'm 59) I just brush it off and don't give it any worry. Any thoughts here appreciated!
Was enjoying the family interaction, even understanding the swearing your family so freely exercises. Funny how people always have to one up their behavior. I felt sad that among all the family freedom and respect for each other's opinion the younger daughter had to swear using the name of Jesus Christ to swear. It's His birthday, He has blessed your family tremendously, even handing Mel the high 5 and 5,4,3,2,1 strategies. Turned you right off at 37:17.
This was good but the language at times is foul and you blaspheme the LORD name. People are very sensitive to others identity but not towards people of faith. Please consider not saying "Jesus" as a bad word or saying "Oh my God" as a bad word as well. Just asking in love. ❤
I always love sitting down with my family on the podcast. If you enjoyed this episode then I would be so grateful if you hit that subscribe button. Thank you!
I must confess that I stopped halfway into the video for calling my 20 years old son, who's living and studying abroad, just to say hello and listen to him. Thank you for this great conversation! 👏🏼👏🏻👏🏻
I am pregnant with our third, we’ve been together for 12 years. I love… LOVE these videos. Of a true family. Neither I nor my husband could experience this as kids so it gets sometimes challenging but I pray one day I will sit on a sofa like that with our 3 kids and talk and talk just like you guys. It’s really magical and in my opinion this is pure perfection and worth to live.
I cried listening to this because so many of us had emotionally unavailable parents and that has caused many issues for my sister and I. When you don't have that solid foundation, your kids suffer. Bravo to you and Chris for staying together, for being united for your kids, and for being honest. My father has lied our whole lives so trust is very hard to have within relationships. I thought my now ex husband was so wonderful and loyal, but ended up lying just like my dad and cheating. I've been working on myself ever since. 46 and 8+ years since divorce. I am healing from childhood all the way to now and I'm determined to not let my family's shit affect me, I'm flipping the switch. I chose a broken partner just like me and didn't know it, but as I move forward, I'm learning to love myself and stay true to the real me, and I will eventually find someone who has done the same. Happy Holidays to you all!
This is exactly how I am with my 3 teen boys. They are abnormally honest. My now 15 year old told me that strict parents create sneaky kids and it is so true. Just be honest and real and anything can be worked through.
I’ve got a great one that me and my family do… if someone is feeling bad we don’t automatically try to give advice we actaully ask:
Do you want advice, do you want me to listen or do you just want me to leave … it’s something that will vary from time to time ❤
I don’t have kids, but this openess and genuine effort & growth through imperfection is what I would have appreciated growing up. Thanks for sharing, Robbins family!
This is such a profound conversation and an incredible gift. The one thing that made me sad was that, even though all of the children felt that having their parents cry at the dinner table was a good thing, Kendal kept referring to crying as a sign of weakness. Crying in response to frustration, suffering, pain, and even joy is actually quite a healthy response, a reflection of being in touch with one's lived experience and part of remaining resilient and strong. It is often a large part of regeneration and healing. Numbness and lack of any emotional response to difficulties or suffering is often a sign of disconnection and brittleness, which is, in the end, a far weaker state.
You raised great kids who are growing into well adjusted adults.
"We will never punish you for something we did as kids." With someone who had a physically and emotionally abusive narcissistic father and a codependent mother who enabled him every step of the way I and so many others wish we had parents like you and Chris. Good parents make all the difference in their childern's life.
“We will never punish you for something we also did as kids”.
Lol. Parenting 101 right there 😆
Sweet & inspirational Mel & family! As a single Momma of 2 boys & 3 step kids I always had this “ Mantra “ you tell me the truth NO PUNISHMENT & I KEPT my word!!!
Beautiful & so relatable!!!
Bravo Mel & Chris 💝💓💝
The best podcast. I learned so much. Yes, lots of regrets, but finally became vulnerable in order to let my daughter and son know 'the true me'. Your family is awesome! You as parents are a blessing to your listeners.. BRAVO! Thank you.
Wow Mel and Chris! You’ve raised great kids! Thank you for this podcast! I have a 2 and 7 year old and frequently I question if I’m doing it all wrong! Please do more of these!!
Thank you, Mel! Your family is amazing! I consider it a hats-off situation and a real accomplishment when your kids are the adults in a relationship and you, as a parent, do have the braveness to embrace whatever you did wrong and act to show you want to improve. This is what family is really about! Congrats to that!
Everyone is so articulate! They got it from their momma!
I was blessed with amazing parents too. I was barely punished too. As long as I shared the truth with them, we were good. It made me want to share with my parents.
You wouldn’t be sitting down there, having this conversation if you and your husband weren’t in a loving and healthy relationship.
I think that’s were everything begins, having a good and supporting partner who work together to achieve common goals.
Hi Mel. My kids are now 20 and 28. Our family worked a lot like yours. I saw myself as a guide rather than an authority figure. I would give them the information and allow them to make their own decisions. They trust me, because I would never go back on my word regarding their safety: I knew where they were and with whom. They called me when their designated drivers got drunk and I'd pick them up with no resentment, but rather pride in their maturity. Today, they're responsible adults with jobs, but we still love hanging out together ❤️ ❤
A podcast every parent should listen to and hear it❤ Robbins family you are amazing ❤
Love your family!
This does not happen overnight with relationships with your children! It starts when you bring them home from the hospital!!! 💖💖💖💖💖
amazing parents and amazing kids
How to get your children to trust you and communicate with you when they’re older in my experience is by creating the foundation when they’re younger they can ask approach you with any question. Always answering their questions truthfully, not diverting the answers, not reacting wildly when they ask something uncomfortable, showing them very early on that you are a safe place to bring up any topic, and can let them talk through situations with you no matter what.
Wow this is the best episode ever. Thank you.
What a great episode! It is delightful to see and hear the love between you all ❤️
I had none of this growing up. My father never showed emotion, always the tough guy. He took little interest in my sisters and I when we were young. Mom was more concerned with her relationship with him than with us. There was little communication all the way around. One sister and I were high achievers and well-behaved because we feared dad's wrath. The youngest was a hellion and didn't care about anyone but herself.
At 60, I'm finally addressing the issues from childhood that have impacted my entire life.
Kudos to Mel & Chris for genuinely caring about their kids' development and raising such well adjusted young adults.
This was beautiful! Please more talks like that.
Seeing this...really makes me mourn for the parents I didn't have then or now.
I wish I could get this podcast translated in French so my parents could hear it😭 it would definitely change our relationship. Wow! I am in tears
OMG, just make me want to do that with my sisters and brother, maybe my Dad will sit with us. Thank you!!!
Look at your faces looking at your kids with such a pride and joy❤
I wish I could have a family like this!! ♥️🙏🏻🌈😻
Lovely to see the closeness of your kids. My two sons are five years apart and I am bothered
because they don’t seem close. Could be the age difference or male pride. They both speak to me, but I wish they would be closer.
They are both mature so I am happy about that, but would love for them to be closer.
Thank you Mel and family for sharing this with us.❤️❤️❤️🙏🏾
Loved this episode. My family is so much like yours and what I always say to others is what works for my family may not work for everyone
This was an awesome video. Super eye opening in general but especially for myself as a parent to 2 young boys. I'm trying so hard not to f*ck it up. Loved hearing the perspectives from each of you, especially Chris & Mel's kids. Mel, Thank you. You changed my life. Since taking the POY 2017 course, I've taken every single tool you provided and continued to practice using them. Sure, it hasn't all been smooth, I've fallen and I've fallen hard, but after those falls, I would remember that I have the ability to change it all, and I would get myself back on track. Completely changed how I live my life. Grateful for you!
Please more of this! That was GREAT🤍
❤absolutely beautiful! And such an inspiration! I love you!
Wow! More of these please!
Calling out the hypocrisy…the irony 😱 nicely done authentic fam! Gratitude 🙏🏽 for your transparency and authenticity!! Appreciate your craft, insight and knowledge! ❤❤
I like seeing you and your lucky family talking while having a good time. It is SO important to tell each family person good things about each person in the family because so much sad crap everywhere. But so many family distractions and divisions affects many. Young ones committing suicide scares me so much and it is so sad. I tell my adult children they are important, loved and life is full of ups and downs. Plus they can tell me ANYTHING as a parent. Have a happy holidays. Many love your podcasts and books!!
What an absolutely amazing family. It brings so much joy to my heart to see you with your husband and kids. I'm only 20 minutes in and I'm going to save this to watch it with my wife. Thank you. 🙏☮️💞
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for this video! I am a mom struggling with every thing you have discussed here. To hear this from the kids perspective was so eye opening and made me feel like I have a real chance at doing right by my kids. I love you Mel and am so glad that I found you. You have amazing kids who were clearly raised by amazing parents. I am so looking forward to more videos with your family ♥️♥️
Also my name is Lisa somehow my son Aidan’s name comes up!
This is the best episode ever! Thank you so much Robbins family! This episode is so helpful not just for family but also applicable for other type of relationships. Thanks again Mel! Happy Holidays to the whole fam! More blessings to you!
This was beautiful! Such a great bond as a family!
Mel I haven't listened to this yet, but I can't wait to later. It's been one of those crazy last day of school before Christmas break perfectly imperfect Mom mornings 😂❤️😂 that led to a lot of laughs and all the gifts getting out, cupcakes delivered in time for the school party(even in HS they just keep on going 😂)and work gifts in the car 😂. I am so happy to see you in this picture Mel so chill and relaxing with your beautiful family. ❤️There is no greater gift for a mom then to be making memories with her children especially at Christmas.🎄🎅⛄ Enjoy every minute beautiful Momma and make loads of precious memories.🫶✋ You are glowing and I couldn't be happier for you.😊💛 God bless the Robbins family. 🙏 Wishing you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy and Healthy 2023.🎄🎅⛄🎉
Love this fam and how real and open you guys are from a mom of young adult kids! Great podcast and listening on repeat! Great job Mel and Chris!!
Great video ❤amazing advice thank you!
This was an AMAZING episode! So many thoughts I cannot put them into words! Y'all Rock!! 💖💗💞
This is what we All need to listen to ❤😊
People need to understand that years of having this relationship is what has developed these healthy relationships but for those that are just starting to make changes… it takes time… and breaking old habits. But also let your kids know you are trying to make changes… actions have to match your words. But please know it may take the same amount of yours you haven’t been communicating. I have a healthy relationship with my daughter but we have built that over her entire life. But it’s never to late to change and creat what you want
What a telepathy! it came exact time that I need it. I had just little argument with my son today in the evening so it came. I hope it could help me to figure out how to tackle the situation onwards. Thank you Mel😊❤️ Always eger to listen you 🙏♥️😘🤗
Such a beautiful and open 👪. Wish I was part of it!
Merry Christmas to the Robbins!
Thank you so much for this, please repeat 💖
Beautiful family! Thank you for sharing
I totally got a lot out of your open family gathering. I'm the other outside parent, from a divorce, to my 2 children. 19 and 21. I am actively communicating with my daughter, while my son 21 completely ignores me. I text, leaving messages of encouragement and my love for him.. Both actually. But for over 2 years he doesn't respond. I send him money for xmas via CApp and no ty. Just an example, bcuz that's not the point. It's heart wrenching not to be actively involved in his life. I do not push him. 😭 And my daughter and i are still working on our relationship. I am so proud of her for opening the door and working with me. Good advice in here.. Thank you all ❤
Cristinalz thank you for your comment. My son acts the same way..ignores me. It is weird thing but something with their generation. I would write my adult children once a month they live in differ states FL and VA. Both said for me to stop writing because they just throw my letters away. Boy did that hurt! So I stopped.
Got massive lesson
So how do you enforce limits without putting the connection at risk?
❤❤❤❤❤
At age four, spend time with them. Play with them. That is communicating that you are interested in them. If possible don’t put them in daycare from early till late.
Mel, just curious is that the painting behind you? the one you mentioned in previous episode.
Also, give your kids what they need. Not what you need...
Mel, how do we fix the relationship with your adult children? Can we use these suggestions to FIX the relationship now or is it too late to build honest communication with your adult children
This was fun to listen to, thank you! I HAVE A QUESTION tho: Could you discuss the subject of "Woke" 20-somethings being offended constantly by their 80-something grandparents? This is a huge thing we're dealing with between our daughter and my parents, and I am NOT looking forward to Christmas. She is torn and has kept silent until recently when she told us this was bothering her this much. Her dad and I have discussed the differences between how people grew up, the why's and how's (my parents were both very young in the war in Germany and Race, Gender Issues, and well, they have a strong opinion on everything based on local news content and comments. Their comments and jokes are based on older times and experiences, and there is no intent on creating bad feelings or arguing with family. They're also very old and aren't going to change their minds, so why bother? We told daughter to consider all this and if she still feels she needs to speak up, speak up calmly and quietly. My parents would be crushed to hear our daughter is upset at them, or that they've done something wrong, but at the same time, they're 83yrs old and maybe it's no big deal to them. I've heard it so long (I'm 59) I just brush it off and don't give it any worry. Any thoughts here appreciated!
Hmmm?
You are amazing and beautiful I want to be a one daughter you
Was enjoying the family interaction, even understanding the swearing your family so freely exercises. Funny how people always have to one up their behavior. I felt sad that among all the family freedom and respect for each other's opinion the younger daughter had to swear using the name of Jesus Christ to swear. It's His birthday, He has blessed your family tremendously, even handing Mel the high 5 and 5,4,3,2,1 strategies. Turned you right off at 37:17.
May Allah guide this beautiful family to İslam.amine.🌹
This was good but the language at times is foul and you blaspheme the LORD name. People are very sensitive to others identity but not towards people of faith. Please consider not saying "Jesus" as a bad word or saying "Oh my God" as a bad word as well. Just asking in love. ❤
I wasn’t comfortable with Chris being on his phone during the kids answers.
Your Family makes me smile , Thanks Mel for sharing.