Why do we never talk about ambiverts. I’m introverted in certain circumstances but If I feel comfortable and safe I am somewhat extroverted. Thx FJ FOR ADDRESSING THIS. I’m definitely ambivert.
Being an INFJ feels like being all 16 personalities and none of them at the same time. It's really hard cuz you totally see how others are, but no one can see how you are.
My INFJ friends feel this way, but I’ve noticed that it isn’t quite true. One in particular is completely confident in his perception of others but is often wrong.
I'm an INFJ that can 'turn on' extroversion around people I care to interact with. I don't really speak unless spoken to but when I do I try to talk, smile and laugh boldly to make people feel comfortable around me
Me too i was always the extrovert i think acting classes helped with that. But i realized i didnt have good people around me so i became introverted because of it. When im around good people the extrovert comes out because I feel relaxed.
me too!! It took me some time before I realised that I subconsciously talk more or be more goofy when I know that it can be awkward otherwise and that it might help lighten the mood a bit and make people feel more comfortable, but if I am in a group with 2 or more extroverts then I leave the job to them and go back to just sitting and observing everyone. :)
As an INFJ, I feel like I'm very introverted unless there is someone I feel is more introverted than me. In this case I try to open up this person and help them blend in. And if I really am the most introverted in a group setting, I just wait until someone notices me.
I don't know about having a crisis over it. I kinda like it. I was always a floater and got along with everyone. But I didn't change, I just sorta "spoke their language" but said my own words and opinions. I love it. Makes me endlessly curious about people, which is probably why people think I'm highly extroverted.
When I was little I asked my dad if there was an instruction book for life. He said the Bible. I believe in god but that wasn’t what I meant, I mean how to do the day to day living haha
This totally resonates. I’m an INFJ who is always busting out random excessive bursts of extroversion that are over the top and then experience paralysing self consciousness and regret later and overthink others perceptions of me as a loon. I recently broke into the Tom Hanks song he performs in the movie Big at work including a small dance. Thought this would be entertaining but nobody got the reference and the tumbleweed rumbled through my soul. Frank. I adore your content, wry humour and analysis. You are the cherry in my pie
I think I'm a INFJ I'm not pretty sure yet, bc i take two times the same test, it was pretty large and was a recommended for a friend who say that was trustworthy, so, I made it, two times, and the same answers, so I look up for more information and oh my surprise, the majority information I got was for the inbevert, or introvert type(I don't know how to write it, sorry, English is not my native language.) And I'm like...I CAN talk to other people perfectly I'm just...not connect, like, I can listen to you and pretend I care about in what you saying, but if there isn't a connection, I'm just pretendig listening, but, if we are closed I would talk to you about almost everything, and of course, some times I have this conversation with myself where I'm talking deep shit in my mind.
One time I was at work and I was really bored so I started dancing and I thought it was fun, asked my friend to dance and everyone stopped and asked it if was high. Normally I'm a pretty quiet person and keep to myself. People would describe me as a quiet kid in school, but then I just have a sudden need to talk at the speed of light to literally anyone or do something I absolutely would never to in a normal state of mind and sometimes I have to fight so hard to restrain myself because I know after five minutes I'll regret it so bad.
When I’m around other introverts who are also feelers, it seems like I become more extroverted around them because they somehow make me open up and feel related?
This is exactly what I was thinking. Our base stays the same but I think these subtypes could be a sliding scale. I was introverted INTROVERTED younger but now my introversion is very low. I look like an extrovert to other types at most times. I was with an extroverted sensor for 18 years so my theory is that pushed me to use that function more. I do still need to rest and retreat sometimes though.
Awwe, okay I know I'm late to reply, but just do it! I'd feel important and valued if my friend came back, I would have also missed them everyday and talking it out to the fullest extent is what would make me feel that we both gave everything to keep the friendship. I hope your friendship workes out!!! God bleee
@@JacobGrim I luckily wasn't, I talked with her a lot. She knows how I meant some things and read my behaviour right. I'm socially awkward sometimes 😅 I'm happy ( and lucky ) she can read me so well. She's amazing 💕
I am just apologizing on beforehand, and usually, they say it is okay. Sadly sometimes I get a lot of shit for it hahah. I also either get comments, like "Why do you talk so much? or "why aren't you saying anything?" And then I am just put in this conflict of what I am supposed to do? I guess Philosophy has helped me there, to just go the Golden middle-way between two extremes as Aristotle said. I talk and respond, but also listen to what people are saying. It is apparently working so... i guess my 22 years of trial and error i have finally managed to get somewhere. I don't want to imply anything or bother you Bjorn, but are you perhaps Scandinavian, like Norwegian perhaps? It is the name you see as Bjørn is Bear in Norwegian. Another reason for why I know this is because I grew up in Norway. It might just be a coincidence hah.
As an INFJ I usually tend to act differently with everyone Like I can get sooo social and active when I'm excited or when talking to someone I feel at ease with ( especially kids lol) but then can turn extremely socially anxious when I don't know them it's a struggle
I am an INFJ. I feel drained after social events, and whenever I have an event coming up I dread going to it and socializing. But when I do go, I either enjoy it, or I dislike it. Sometimes I feel more alone when I’m in a group compared to when I am truly by myself. Despite all of this anxiety, if I’m by myself too much I *need* socialization. In new environments, I don’t talk to people. I talk to them when they talk to me, or talk when there is a shared interest, but starting a conversation is hard for me. And yet, I complain about not having friends. I complain that I can relate to most people I meet, but none of them can fully relate to me. I complain that I don’t hang out with friends, even though I don’t make any effort to try and hang out with them. It’s like my personality contradicts itself. I’ve started to watch your channel, and love all of your content, especially the INFJ content. Great video!
I would call me a middle INFJ, though that might just be my need to make everything even and balanced lol. I try not to gloat when it comes to me being smart, and I know this will make me sound full of myself, but when my teachers keep telling me I’m smart, I joke around and act like I’m confident. I’m sort of not confident, but I hope that my mask helps to make me truly a bit more confident. If I had that then I’d be pretty well off.
Painfull isnt it? Being alone, left behind, hated, despised, even if they tell u they love u and will never leave u. U just cant trust them. Not in the sense that they will understand. Not in the sense that u can put into words. The mask u put on everyday, every morning hurts u more and more. U try to take it off, but it sticks like thats the way u want the world to see u. The smile, quite, good listeners type.
@@Sweeps, you just described me word for word. It's reassuring to know there are other INFJs like this. I was going crazy thinking that there's something wrong with me, lmao
This is very interesting because I’m INFJ, and when most people meet me they are convinced I’m an extrovert, but that’s only cause I’ve worked on coming across as super confident for years. Truth is I constantly cancel group or people plans because it sounds real exhausting even though I want to be with people. I think a lot, but I can also communicate well and listen. I’m almost never sad when someone else cancels lol, cause yay alone time. 🙌🏼
The only people I make definite plans with are my immediate family. Everything else is a maybe. My family made Mondays Family Day every week when I moved out because they never saw me. I go to work, home, church, and Family Day. That’s it. Haven’t been grocery shopping since March. It’s too people-y in Walmart.
I’m an INFJ and I feel like I’ve cycled through each of these types throughout my life kind of based on how much self confidence I felt at that point in time. Love your channel
does anyone know how am i supposed to turn my introverted thinking , Ti or introverted intuition, Ni back on?! 😭😭 ive gotten so used to being the extrovert infj for like my whole life and like now i feel like i’ve lost..? or idk just how to activate it??
THIS!!! I have to straight up tell my family to back off when I come in the door. I love them, and I know they want to make small talk, but I have "small talked" all day long. It's like asking a maid to clean, or a painter to paint, or a chef to cook when they get home. I need some time to decompress. The worst part is that I feel guilty for decompressing because I know they love me, and that's why they wanted to "small talk" in the first place. I'm an INFJerk and I hate that about myself sometimes.
100% guilty of the whole "I know, I know what you're saying, let me talk" thing ambiverted INFJs do. I'm working on it, because even I know it's really annoying. I just have so many ideas and thoughts and I hate wasting time, so it's a struggle.
YES omg... especially growing up in a big loud family where I’m constantly fighting to be heard... it’s just a reflex to try to jump in, def have to work on that haha
I am sooo guilty of this! It's just I have so many comments on what somebody is saying to me and I know I'll forget all of them by the time they finish what they're saying...
Yeah I’m guilty too 😞 I unintentionally cut people off or guess the word they were going to say next cause they were going slow. This might also be cause I have ADHD idk. Anyways I somehow found 2 introverted best friends that make me bold. :)
I used to be an extroverted INFJ as a teenager. A lot of energy put on the others, less on myself. That leaded me to personal and internal problems. Then I focused all my energy on myself, and my self discovering. Therefore became an introverted INFJ. But helped me a lot to learn about myself. But always had in mind as a bigger goal to help others. But always thinking the following: "If I can't controll my life, neither I could help with other's". That was a lot of introspecting and self learning. After all the process, now I am a healthier INFJ, an "ambibert" INFJ. I think of myself when it's necessary, but still put my energy on who DESERVE it. This path leaded me to have better relationships, less but closer friends at the end.
How funny... Im reading my own story line! I can understand you very very well.. And u know.. Wot u gonna heading towards next? Something interesting gonna come in ur life and u gonna realise Why you have done all those things in the past and wot was that all abt and everything under the universe ❤️. Happy to see such a person atleast in a random comment section
100% I'm the Ambiverted INFJ. So many times I start smiling before the climax of someones story because I can guess what's about to happen. I've been called out on it a few times😅.
I'm an INFJ. I like my alone time but I also get so much out of engaging conversations with people that I love and trust. It allows me to unload and I often have a need to feel understood and validated when it comes to dealing with problems big or small. It comes back to that communication thing I guess. I can go a week without seeing people but I also generally like to socialize at least once a week. Preferably in one on one or small groups with close friends.
Oh, yeah, small groups of friends - the only way to socialize! Throw in just one non-friend and I have to shut down and just listen especially when I know the person thinks less of me or likes to talk. Fine, have it.
I’ve had other MBTI people say, “But you’re so personable and friendly! I would never guess you’re INFJ.” Yeah, well, I can do that for a few hours, but then I need a day or so to recover. It’s nice to see other people turn on and off.
Same. I don't dislike people, in fact I like being around them. But hells, I need my alone time or else I'll go insane! And I definitely prefer my close circle of family and friends to acquaintances or strangers.
Same ! Commication is huge for me. But Commication in general. I need to talk to get out of my head. Or what I like to call "the battle" that goes on inside my head. The two debate teams playing ping pong with endless streams of thought. And than there's my need to commicate with really close ppl whom I love so that don't feel I'm ignoring them. They have needs too and I feel we should all be in the know of each other's needs.
I always burst into laughter when you mention INFJs and the deep abstract stuff that's in our mind & our sense of responsibility to communicate it for the good of everyone else 😂 I mean, that's it 😂 never have I felt so good-humoredly understood
"INFJs when they're really losing their mind about what's going wrong in their life, it's usually, like, some _thing_ is going haywire" This is true for me on a spiritual level lol.
Does even an issue w a person become a THING? Is that why we get so upset? Ex: Dad dies of alcoholism...we go insane trying to figure out alcoholism? Or the emotionally unstable mind?
I’m an INFJ, and my daughter is an INFJ, and we are so opposite! It bothers her a lot that I have taken the MBTest 3 times and always come up INFJ. I just sent this video to her, because this explains a LOT! She’s the totally introverted one, and I’m the ambivert one.
Might want to make sure you’re taking one of the more reliable tests too, 16 personalities is not always the best source. Learning the functions is a must too.
Ambivert and introvert INFJs shouldn't be opposites... Maybe one of you is mis-typed? I'm an introverted INFJ, but I mis-typed as INTP for years because I didn't know myself well enough to answer tests accurately.
I think you can see & understand from your test results, there are percentages listed, my introvert and judging scores are almost 100 percent, 80 percent intuitive, while my thinking and feeling scores are almost the same or balanced, so sometimes my results are intj or infj 🤔🤔🤔
Some of my friends understand that I am that person who picks up on the little things and even on hidden things that most wouldn't understand or see. It's even more awkward having to explain or even have another person watch the interaction between a friend and I because they believe that it is very weird based on what I'm doing. For example, I studied my best friends and how they move when at home so that I understand what their day to day life is like. It helps me understand when they're busy, free, or just doing a specific thing. My best friend Gordon and I smoke together, so I figured out the times when he wants to smoke based off of gut feeling rather than actually calculating as a specific time like others would. So they would watch me grab his weed and start rolling but would get confused because they didn't hear Gordon say anything to me before he left the room. When he comes back he says, "Oh! You did it. Perfect timing. Lets go smoke" and others will be completely confused on how I know. Understanding people's internal clocks, actions and thought process really helps make everything more efficient without having to say anything. It is 50/50 depending on the person. Either they love it because you understand them, their timing and how they like certain things or they hate it because they don't want others to know that much information and/or find it stalker-ish.
Ambivert INFJ- Yeah I’ve definitely come off as irritating and aloof at times to other people. I always thought the not listening and skipping ahead thing was ADHD though. And here I find out I am just annoying 😭😂
I think infj's can evolve from more introverted to less introverted and with people they know well (and accept them as they are) be even very extroverted. Infj's need harmony around them to be able to open up. A very dominant and critical Sally (yeah, i know who she is cause i am an infj😀) can cause an infj to become very introverted i guess.. (it would be easier to explain this in my own language...🤯)
We’re interested in people and our problem isn’t social anxiety as Frank was saying, it’s the overwhelming, draining information you get from being in social situations. If we’re not overwhelmed we enjoy company. So I guess with family and close friends we already know a lot about them, how they’re likely to be feeling, this isn’t coming at us as new information to read. That’s what I’ve assumed is the difference anyway.
Yep. Ambivert INFJ. I've been called a know-it-all who must always be right by my hubby and family members, especially as I've gotten older and a bit more extraverted. It is good to step back and realize that other people process their experiences differently and who am I to interfere or judge. Even if we can predict certain outcomes and behaviors, it doesn't mean it's our place to always point them out.
I relate so much with the bad listener part. Everytime my sister starts telling a story and using so many unnecessary details and long explanations, I either get really antsy or just tune it out entirely.
Oh my gosh! Yes! It is so annoying to me when a person goes on and on and I already got their point in the first few seconds and have my answer ready! I’m just impatiently waiting to give my answer and wish they would shut up long enough to hear it!
I'm the second type and it annoys me as well! I don't want to interrupt others, I'm just trying to save everyone's time. (facepalming myself because of myself)
Me too. Especially if you are thinking of doing something different and important yet they are there telling you about something you know where is really heading
Omgosh.. I found my tribe!! Do you think two INFJ would constantly interrupt each other and get annoyed? Or understand each other so deeply we wouldn't have to finish?
Your examples are so spot on. I avoid big parties not because I’m afraid to talk to people but because so much talk about the weather exhausts me...a lot! And I don’t feel it’s worth it.
Being a single, very introverted INFJ makes you think of dating like that horrible, terrible thing 👏 so much trouble and energy investment heeeelll no ⚰️
I was a very extraverted INFJ as a kid until I got bullied. At that time, I thought everyone were my friends and the hurt made me recoil inside my own mind. I've recently restarted being extroverted and opening myself back to the world.
lol yeah I'm a major introvert. Just the other day I saw a lady delivering goodies to a neighbor and the two were having a conversation. And all I could think about was the energy it would take out of me to do such a thing. I expressed this to my mom who was beside me. She misunderstood my introversion as misanthropy (as always but I don't blame her). But I assured her, "I would LOVE to do nice things for people, mom. I just don't wanna talk to them!" xD
Tracy Jekyll he said that and I literally turned to an invisible camera like 😬😐 haha damn! I already know, but hate to hear it coming externally as well as just internally as usual haha it’s just so hard for me to listen through a whole shpeel with ppl when I friggen get it, just get to the point! And to be fair, it’s not necessarily an act when our intuition is usually right. Even before people realize it themselves! But who has the time to unscramble that type of insight to someone who would never understand. It’s hard enough to unscramble it to myself!
I think that there are more types of INFJ ... 🤔divided not only by extroversion ... because I can find myself in all three groups, depending on the circumstances, the people I am with and the topic of conversation...and overall mood.
I'm extroverted in situations only because I don't want anyone to feel as awkward as I do. I spend all my energy looking for the wallflowers that are lonely because I can physically feel their angst and I have to take care of them. I try to make everyone happy and comfortable by adapting to their personality then I go home wired and exhausted. I spend my time wishing someone would want to know me but at the same time, I know I'll never give them the chance to see all of me, only small pieces and never the whole. I'm a contradiction in terms and it's exhausting. The blessing and the curse of an INFJ; absorbing the emotions of everyone around you and analyzing every single person you come in contact with. While everyone else is thinking what a nice person Timmy is, I'm seeing a kid that has been abused and is acting out in various ways and will become a serial killer in ten years.
fr though. for some reason i just cant seem to trust anyone i meet, even my 'close friends'. i give them bits and pieces of my life, never the whole thing. idk why but no one seems like they would understand or care and it just makes me feel better if i dont burden other people with issues im facing. but at the same time i feel shitty if they dont check up on me or realise that something is going on, because its so easy for me to tell if someone feels a bit off. so because of that i end up wanting someone who can see under the lines and i get upset if my friends dont. totally get my expectations up(completely my fault) and get dissapointed in the end. like TF is wrong with me, dont be wishy washy, stick to one thing. you cant have both. :(
Omg this is in all honesty one of the most relatable comment I've seen out here and it does make me feel a little relieved to know I'm not the only one feeling this way :and doing stuff like that :""D
I hate it when I'm in a group, peole are talking, there's a newbie and they're being left out!! I'm just the same - have to make the stranger feel comfortable in a new situation, even if I'm in the same boat!!!
Thank you!! Me too but hubby has been convinced for years that he’s an introvert and I’m an extrovert because of this. Recently I said, dude you’re not an introvert and he reevaluated and came to the same conclusion as I have. I’m also glad he’s talking about the bell curve. I’m so tired of everyone thinking it’s one or the other. It’s a sliding scale and can move throughout your life.
Hello! I just want to say that your channel has really helped me out! I am an INFJ (realised from your video that I’m most likely an ambiverted INFJ) and have taken a lot of tests and researched cognitive functions. Lately, I believed that I may be an ENFJ instead as someone told me that I’m quite extroverted and my Fe is very high. However, although I can speak to others if spoken to, I believe that I’m really awkward and like to be alone (yet, ironically, I also feel pretty lonely and want people to like me - hah!) But, I’ve realised that I tend to mirror the people around me. For instance, if people are very lively I’ll perk up a bit - if people are more quiet, I relax and tone down. But, additionally, if there is someone a lot shyer than me, I’ll appear more extroverted because I don’t want them to feel left out. I’ll quickly take on a motherly/caretaking role so that they feel included. I think that’s because I hate feeling left out, so I make sure that they don’t too. I thought that because of this, I may be an ENFJ instead as I believed that INFJs are supposed to be quiet and introverted (which I am most of the time). But, this video made me realise that INFJs can fall onto a spectrum of introversion/extroversions. I’m sorry for my long message. I just really love your channel and your INFJ focused videos! You’re really helping me to discover and learn about my type, which is really interesting. Thank you! I hope you have a great day :)
I come off extroverted to alot of people at first. Because I tend to be really loud and hyper with quiet people/introverts like me. But when people do get to know me, especially my friends, they start to realize I'm an introvert because they only see me like 2x a year. No joke, even before covid I've only met my bestfriend twice in 2019 LOL
I turn on the extrovert when in group meetings or for presentations. Also, when somebody just needs to volunteer to get things over with, I'll get it over with real quick. I hate fake shyness and I see it all around me, I believe. But, my true happiness is away from the crowd, no mandatory meetings, a desk away from the hub, and not having to entertain or indulge everyone else.
When you talked about the extroverted/introverted INFJ, I laughed hard😂 I wasnt sure what subtypes of INFJs were until you named them and then you mentioned the 2nd one and I was like Yep that's me😂 Seriously tho one thing, When we interrupt the speaker it's unintentional because we honestly know where this goes and we are not trying to act smart we are just trying to speed up the process that is taking place. And when I try to listen even tho I already know where this is going I get this boredom feeling that makes me want to change the subject. So Im kinda stuck with "Yeah, Okay I got it lemme explain it to you" interruption way😂😂
I think its important to realize though that you dont always know where its going and that no matter how confident you feel in your Ni, you owe the other person a sincere listening ear especially if you are initiating THEM to talk to YOU. Im more of an introverted infj and my cousin is more of an ambivert. If she can tell there is something wrong she'll proceed to ask me(typical infj needing to be the therapist and confidant which is absolutely fine), I'll start talking, she'll jump to conclusions, and because half the time her conclusions is actually nothing close to what im actually concerned about and because i hate being misunderstood i shut down. Then weeks later when she realizes what the actual problem was she gets mad at me for "being secretive" and "not letting her in". I've sort of decided to look for a listening ear elsewhere because being misunderstood is the bane of an infjs existence and when an infj thinks they are are right, there is no convincing them otherwise; they'll have to discover it for themselves which is why i dont try to talk over her and re explain myself when she jumps to conclusions because in her head her conclusion is absolute. I know i do this sometimes too when friends ask for advice and I've also been proved that my "hunches" are not always right. Ni works best when you actually take in all the information first. When i listen to everything that has to be said, only then am i creepily accurate at predicting what can/will happen.
If my friends needs to rant, the don’t usually need me to actually listen and I tend to zone out. If they are asking for advice, I have to force myself not to disassociate. Human interaction is not my forte. But my friends like asking for advice. It’s easier in a message because I can reread until I’ve gotten everything down and they got it all out in one go.
This is so me 😂😂 I know it’s rude to assume and I can hold myself back, so most people think I’m a good listener. But really my inner dialogue is coming up with ways to solve the other persons problems etc wondering why they can’t see the obvious. But at the same time I can understand them and put myself in their shoes and empathise. But again at the same time I just wanna go back to thinking about myself and “who cares about anyone else” but then I wanna help them but usually that’s to boost my own ego? Ahhh I just contradict myself so much 😂
1000% yes. I don't interrupt people because I don't want to look like a know it all..i just see where it's going 5 seconds into the question and know how to tackle it. The faster i can address your concern the faster I can move onto the next concern. I always worry people get mad when I interrupt. I can't help it because I already know what you're thinking.
This is the first time I've heard someone talk about extroverted INFJs and how we struggle with knowing who we truly are and it's super relieving to know I'm not alone in that feeling lol
Definitely an extroverted INFJ. I switched between all of these at different times, and I especially tend to get typed by 16 personalities as an INFP or ENFP because, as a concert pianist, I've been forced to develop my Se and Fi beyond where INFJs usually do in order to becone a better performer , but at the end of the day I'm at my best when I can rely on introverted intuition and create huge, weblike long-term plans and stories that often stretch over a long time frame, which is much closer to the combination of introverted intuition and thinking of the classic INTJ and INFJ.
*this is a lot of extraverted sensing you're asking me to do, I'm not a fan* - my answer from now on to anyone trying to get me to participate in any social interaction whatsoever
At first I was thinking that responding to this was too much in the way of extraverted sensing for me to do and then I thought, “no- I must validate these beings. They are my people. And together we can take a stand.”
I believe all of these subgroups are within every INFJ. I just think the level of consciousness in the individual determines what traits are outwardly and inwardly expressed.
From what I’ve heard, INFJs can be like chameleons adapting to their surroundings. I’ve always felt that I was capable of blending in with different groups of people. I’ve never been in a room though and thought I was the smartest person in it lol. While Ni and Ti tend to be the functions I favor, my type of job makes me have to flex my SE so it isn’t difficult to use. I would just prefer not to use it if the moment doesn’t require it.
I tested INFJ/ENFJ when I was 30 & was required to be MBTI tested for work. I have read that INFJs are the most extroverted of the introverts. Truly, I was much more extroverted when I was younger & had to be vivacious & cheerful (a variation of cool & attractive) in order to "fit in"; now that I'm older, I can say booger off to people & live like the hermit I was destined to be hahaha... but I AM writing the book that'll solve the world's problems.... 😉😁
I'm very introverted infj. I could be home forever with my dogs and husband and kids only and be perfectly happy. I love my husband and kids and open up to them often, perhaps to their annoyance at times lol. I do like short superficial interactions with strangers, just enough to engage and them to smile while I run errands. Then I hurry back to my house in the country far enough away that I don't get pop-ins.
I recently noticed I interrupt people by coming with some weird analogy to tell them "I got you, I get it" and they are like: "yeah, well actually no but..." and I realized that's annoying. Now I try to listen all the way through and actually pay attention to what they are saying. I've forgot how to social during this quarantine😂
I'm naturally very introverted, but I had a job for decades where I HAD to learn to talk to people & forced me to be very extroverted, so even though I'm definitely not a 'people person', I can now talk to just about anyone with no problem... but at the same time, I don't really WANT to talk to them, which is weird...
I'm an introvert, I enjoy going out with my friends. Im a normally loud guy when im around people im comfortable with. When im surrounded by strangers im quiet and keep to myself.
FRANK Before watching the vid, I just wanna applaud you for making us laugh while understanding our messy selves. Thank you and we will alwaya be here to support you! -A fellow INFJ
@@sea_of_love I never thought I'd meet another cool INFJ that's also doing a great job at explaining to us who we are.. The visible and invisible parts of us..
I’m an introvert, prefer to communicate through my writing, but I can go to a social event and fake it and charm the heck out of people but it takes a lot out of me. As I’ve gotten older it’s easier for me to socialize.
I feel like I have went through all 3 types of these INFJs throughout my life, but definitely more ambiverted. People believe I am an extrovert, as I am social in public, but I prefer a lot of alone time to think and process.
I am an extroverted INFJ. What I can tell you is , it's a lot of masking and performing, followed by days of ghosting everyone. I will be in my room and not say word one to people, not answer my phone, email or have any human contact. I exhaust myself. I have met so many people like me who love cars but don't drive. Why? It means interacting with road rage situations, and I don't like that sort of confrontation. I would just let everyone go first and then feel bad or worry constantly. I know l creep people out. I actually figured out I was an INFJ after being told I was like Marilyn Manson in Betty Crockers body. Yes, he is an INFJ extrovert type as well.
Thissss.... Had to spend a couple of days at a friend's because of some issues with my own apartment. A lot of talking and all... It really drained the hell out of me. But i just had to adapt to the situation. So, everyone who met me at that time would mark me as an introvert. Fast forward to two weeks later after my apartment issue was resolved, i rushed back home that very day because i needed the quiet comfort of my room. Didn't contact anyone or leave my room for days.
Not me... I’m the one listening for 20 minutes... seriously hurry tf up like talk so slow and I have work/life to do. I’m super patient... to a point! 😏
Dude, all the time! I got this bs at work right now. I can read situations so fast its like yep...i see this is going south. Someone at work is intimidated by me cuz i was the quiet hard worker that nobody saw coming. Worked my way up and this chick is pissed cuz by not kissing ass i got where i needed to be. She resorted to saying straight to our boss i was talking shit about her. Funny thing was, all my coworkers tell me im too QUIET all the time and that im pretty much doing my job and not yackin. When my boss approached me with this crap i was very confused. She kept saying i hate her and i never said anything. All i said was, it would be nice if you would do your job instead of ditching me to do it for you and you kiss the bosses rear as im doing both our jobs. She started giving me dirt looks, literally finding more ways to avoid me, and she started saying shit to my boss who caught on what she was doing. Im literally waiting for the 2nd random wtf is going on with u two. I got to a point where i went full on shutdown. Stopped doing as much and wouldnt do her stuff, started getting defiant, and rly not talk to anyone or got snarky or sarcastic, or rebelling. Yaaaa. There were alot of unfairness towards me and once i throw down i had it, i got the oh your talking smack. So, can an infj be intimidating? Some say i am and some say im just a little teddybear. Odds be in their favor upon approaching. Lol but rly tho.
@@snoozebutton23 I think that since us INFJs don't say a whole lot all the time, when we do and we have something to say that's kind of blunt, everyone acts like it's a big deal when it's really not lol
I have went through the process from being extrovert INFJ to becoming introvert as I have aged. I still try to sit on my smart and hide it. I do believe I know where you are going a step ahead of you (really ruins TV and movies). I don't listen but am told by everyone I am a great listener. I fuzz into 4 spirals while trying to keep up with you. There are many T people in my family and being smart with people doesn't hold a lot of ground. Now I have to hide that I know it all. I lost a lot of interest in people. Getting into plants. Trying to be positive cause it creates positive. Get time to myself as much as possible. I am exhausted. My mom tells me wait until you are old. I'm not 40 yet. I guess after 50 I will get a better appreciation for my S that I am losing. Don't take me as down, I am the happiest I have been my entire life. I know it sounds negative. I learned I am enough just 2 years ago. I have young children who hold my heart. I'm proud of myself. I'm an addict but I am clean. I am not suicidal. Oh kid you not I am finally happy. People pleasing almost killed me. I got a phone call while writing this, shifted focus and who knows where this started Ok, thank you for your thoughts. As always I enjoy hearing about MBTI.
I lean more toward being an extroverted infj when I'm around people I know really well, and become less so when I'm around new people or aquaintences. I describe it as being "outgoing" and it's like an on/off switch for me.
I’m a more extroverted infj in that I crave new social experiences even if they aren’t super easy or relaxing for me. If I only hang out with introverted friends I actually get frustrated because I then have to take on the role of the friend who convinces others to go out on the town with me, and if they finally agree they won’t dance they just stand as wallflowers. So I need extroverted friends too. A lot of people think I’m extroverted when they meet me out somewhere, but I can’t keep up the act for long 😅
You might like hanging out with a ENFJ. We're social butterflies who love being supportive. They'd try new stuff with you while also giving you space when you need it.
Until now, I considered myself an INTJ, but in reality I am an INFJ 5W4. The most interesting thing is how I realized that I am INFJ: listening to Nuages - Closer song and thinking deeply: everyone's heart is delicate, everyone wants kindness, love and understanding in their hearts, everyone on earth is like that, and that is why I thought that the heart of people is delicate, which made me realize that I am actually an INFJ.
I'm very aware of that time stamp myself BtheLightas so as a result I've been working on social fillers for when I'm completely burnt-out. My favorite social filler is laughter alongside smiling. I'm not gonna say it's easy because when I'm exhausted I feel low-energy to the point where I need to take a nap 😴 but in those moments I make sure I become the best actor I can be in order to carry my weight as an adult in a social/professional environment. Filler laughs and smiles can be used every other sentence to show that you're interested in the conversation and that you're listening. If you have any questions lmk I have alot of game when it comes to this topic.
Thank You for punch me right between my eyes for showing I'm really annoyng because sometimes I just act like I have everything under my control instead of really listen to the others, and being more open to listen and to receive help for the others. Like, really! What I just loved about had found out that I'm an INFJ is that I'm more conscious about myself, so I can actually understand myself and work to improve myself more, and your channel has been a greeeeaaat helper for me! (Brazilian INFJ talking from here, Thank u for your help!) 💕
The reason why two people with the same type can seem different is because the human psyche depends on two things - nature and nurture. MBTI only tells us about the nature part.
@@post-humangod2575 One's upbringing, the environment they grew up in, and how they have ended up choosing how to act in different social situations based on their life experiences. Seriously recommend you to go to CSJ's channel and watch the first 2 seasons.
Looks like comments containing CSJ's name won't be visible to anyone so I had to edit and abbreviate it lol. It's all good tho, he's just kinda controversial around here.
You don’t know how much of a therapist you are to me, FJ! ♡ I was raised by two extroverts and thus taught how to “properly socialize” and it’s like most of my life, in social settings I learned to be on autopilot extrovert INFJ mode. It wasn’t so bad because I could just stay in my room for the next 30 days after some socializing. But now that I’m a mom and inevitably always around with kids (not yet school age kids), I’m always using my inferior extroverted sensing and now I’ve been spending late nights with my therapist FJ and Google. I feel like everything in me is so wrong and messed up. From now on I’ll try to learn to put off that autopilot mode because it’s messing up my ideals as a mom. Thank you so much!!!
Getting right to the source of my infj conflict. My test keeps switxhing me between infj and enfj. Crowds make me nervous but i love chatting in small groups. Idk.
Same. Doesn't matter if it was a layed back or energized (positively or negatively) ... Still very draining on me. Will go to family functions a lot quicker than one of friends... Always very happy to get a notice the function was cancelled 🤸🙌 . I don't except but a couple of people as close friends. All others I keep at a distance of just aquatints. No problem putting people out of my life for good 👍 . I don't have the mental energy to deal with a lot of BS 😒 . First thing my brain does is assess people for what their feeling and if first time seeing them personality/character reveals. At times I can listen quietly (especially if your not one of my very few people in my trust zone). In my trust zone... Then I love you and I'm here to help AKA get quickly on your nerves by jumping right into the issue with answers or suggestions to help rescue you 🥺😁💪💪... Because I feel a responsibility and a loyalty to you to pick your chin up/lift your heart up/fix your situation/save you from a bad decision/or to glue the breaks in your heart back together ✊ ... If it makes one mad lol then 😂😂😂 great!! I tried . Now I can go recuperate from the exhausting encounter 💁🏼♀️ I can also seem very outgoing... That's because I'm very stressed and feel that I have to be to get through the social occasion (like work for example or my child's school function or a social gathering) ... Truth is... I'm trying to survive so I can retreat back into my own little world 🙌💁🏼♀️🙍♀️ where I'm actually very content to be... Home no place like it 🥰
I’m definitely the super introverted type INFJ, being social is exhausting. I would say that even though I don’t use my extroverted feeling very often, if I have a reason to use it, I can use it well. Maybe that’s just because I am constantly getting silent reads on everyone in the room, even if I never end up using those reads, which gives me the ability to use it when I want to.
This explains a lot. I’m definitely the Ambivert because I always get almost 50% on the Extroversion factor for the Big 5. Also… he’s right, I’m not a good listener but I’m aware and working on it 😅
hey hey, i only "yeah yeah, got it" in conversations with my boyfriend. he has to tell every detail in a story and it takes him like 20 times longer than necessary to get to the point. also, i can figure out the point in the first three seconds. ;-p
When I had friends I preferred when things were spontaneous, because when we made plans I was all hyped but I might feel different when the thing actually took place. I don't like when my mood has time to change for the worse!
I grew up in a family of extroverts, and thought this was the way I should be as well. It was hard for me to distinguish between introversion and depression.
"I know what's going on here". This is one of my worst traits. Only in full adulthood have I figured out that I am actually a moron and that I often have no idea what's going on. So embarrassing. Sorry to everyone I knew earlier in life.
Oh god I feel this. I recently went through a rather humbling period and am realizing just how often I’m a moron. And then accepting that because perfectionism is a freaking disease
I don't know how familiar the other INFJ's are about that but it sometimes happens to me when I'm taking part in a discussion with someone and the other person is complaining about something and I've already made and told my conclusion however I don't want to be impolite and interrupt them so I still say or ask something about the topic. But meanwhile I'm getting irritated because I can't jump to another thing which I've already planned to talk about even before the beginning of the conversation. 😂
“Who’s Sally?” Timmy’s sister, duhhhhh 💁🏻♀️ I’m definitely the middle one. Which makes your rant about know-it-all INFJs feel like a stab 2 the heart 🗡 Drag me harder next time, why don’t ya 😪
Hi Holly! 👋 Just a quick note to thank you for sharing the news of your upcoming wedding! How exciting!! 👰💗🎉 Seven years together is a major accomplishment in itself! Congratulations to you both!! 👏💞 An October wedding sounds absolutely lovely! Autumn is a beautiful season. (I've always been quite fond of October in particular because it's my birth month!) 😊 Warmest wishes to you and your fiance!! May your love continue to grow stronger and more meaningful each and every day!! ❤❤
I’m definitely the first type- the type of social anxiety that we feel is so true, the uncomfortable feeling we get comes from the draining of energy from being around so many people. I don’t feel self-conscious, just completely drained by the presence of that many people
I’m a “literally anything else” kind of person. I’m embarrassed to admit, that I’m going to deliberately skip out on a major event in my sphere of life, just to avoid the social aspect of it.
BasilBaby but don’t you know what? I went through this a lot at Frank’s age, and younger, but I realized that if I feel this way, and I’m working against what I feel in some effort to feel “normal”, I’m not really honoring or appreciating the value of introverts in the world, and if we exist, and we feel this way, just stop trying to be something your not, and trust that you will have all the friends you actually need, somehow, even if you don’t know how, exactly, by being true to yourself. It’s solved everything. Can you believe it? I honored all of those feelings, without kind of, judging myself for it, and it worked. You innately know, somehow, exactly what you need when you need it and your brilliant brain has a way of getting it for you. In YOUR OWN way. I just spent the first 30+ years of my life trying, without even realizing it anymore, to still “fit” in, even though I adopted what I believed was a moral opposition to conforming to the expectations of the external world (at least from college and beyond; before college I was painfully shy in school, and sort of outgoing at home, during college I was very outgoing). I didn’t even realize I was still swimming upstream. Relax, be and do whatever it is that feels best, not what others think may be best. Not what the external world or your super-social-neighbor-who-literally-has-parties-every-other-night-and-he’s-34 does or says. Trust yourself to know how to make you feel at peace. Listen to yourself.
That's so true. From childhood (since I can remember) I was watching movies or cartoons and trying to figure out with what type of character I can compare myself. I see - this one is like that friend, that one is like this relative... And I just can't find myself. Very rearely. The same was with people - I can adjust to them, but not really relate. These video's and understanding better my type and problems I'm dealing with are so eyes opening and helping in life.
I can kinda “turn on” the extroversion and play to be like really outgoing and caring and engaged in conversation and stuff but it really empties my battery to a point that I am unable to properly talk to anyone for a significant amount of time
Subscribe for more videos! 👉 bit.ly/frankjames
My dog. My dog is named Sally. ♥️🦄
I knew it Heather ! I knew your beard didn't lie about it ! ! ! Thank you to have lockleared my day on ! ! ;)
Why do we never talk about ambiverts. I’m introverted in certain circumstances but If I feel comfortable and safe I am somewhat extroverted. Thx FJ FOR ADDRESSING THIS. I’m definitely ambivert.
Hi Frank, which of the three types fits the best for you?
I dont understand functions
Being an INFJ feels like being all 16 personalities and none of them at the same time. It's really hard cuz you totally see how others are, but no one can see how you are.
This is SOOO true
My INFJ friends feel this way, but I’ve noticed that it isn’t quite true. One in particular is completely confident in his perception of others but is often wrong.
@@sydneymallone5933 I know someone like this. They are always so off on their judgements. Really rude and annoying person.
@IHysm DammitimmaD yep lol
TXT,the brightest STAR in the universe it’s lonely 😔
I'm an INFJ that can 'turn on' extroversion around people I care to interact with. I don't really speak unless spoken to but when I do I try to talk, smile and laugh boldly to make people feel comfortable around me
same!
Me too i was always the extrovert i think acting classes helped with that. But i realized i didnt have good people around me so i became introverted because of it. When im around good people the extrovert comes out because I feel relaxed.
me too!! It took me some time before I realised that I subconsciously talk more or be more goofy when I know that it can be awkward otherwise and that it might help lighten the mood a bit and make people feel more comfortable, but if I am in a group with 2 or more extroverts then I leave the job to them and go back to just sitting and observing everyone. :)
Wtf ive always decribed it as a "turn on" button for extroversion
same omg, it's great to know that it's a normal thing to do
As an INFJ, I feel like I'm very introverted unless there is someone I feel is more introverted than me. In this case I try to open up this person and help them blend in. And if I really am the most introverted in a group setting, I just wait until someone notices me.
I can relate so much to that !
same here!
Same
Me too!
I think I just found my long lost twin
You know youre a true infj when you can relate with every single subcategory and end up having another identity crisis over your level of extroversion
Right like I can relate to all three types. It crazy
I have an identity crisis everyday because I’ll wake up and wonder if I’m an infj or a wannabe infj who happens to be an enfj.
Oh....you commented my inner most feelings before I even fully recognized them.
I don't know about having a crisis over it. I kinda like it. I was always a floater and got along with everyone. But I didn't change, I just sorta "spoke their language" but said my own words and opinions. I love it. Makes me endlessly curious about people, which is probably why people think I'm highly extroverted.
LMAO me this whole video
No one:
Me: *trying to learn how to human as an INFJ*
I bought an ebook on how to be a human on Amazon lol
Cassandra M lmao
When I was little I asked my dad if there was an instruction book for life. He said the Bible. I believe in god but that wasn’t what I meant, I mean how to do the day to day living haha
@@cass8330 haha oh man
@@charlie5115 umm Chile- it’s not “sæd” as a word it’s “Tšæd” as a word (Which is why the T is capitalized) 👁👄👁, but no I’m not aware-
This totally resonates.
I’m an INFJ who is always busting out random excessive bursts of extroversion that are over the top and then experience paralysing self consciousness and regret later and overthink others perceptions of me as a loon.
I recently broke into the Tom Hanks song he performs in the movie Big at work including a small dance. Thought this would be entertaining but nobody got the reference and the tumbleweed rumbled through my soul.
Frank. I adore your content, wry humour and analysis. You are the cherry in my pie
I think I'm a INFJ I'm not pretty sure yet, bc i take two times the same test, it was pretty large and was a recommended for a friend who say that was trustworthy, so, I made it, two times, and the same answers, so I look up for more information and oh my surprise, the majority information I got was for the inbevert, or introvert type(I don't know how to write it, sorry, English is not my native language.) And I'm like...I CAN talk to other people perfectly I'm just...not connect, like, I can listen to you and pretend I care about in what you saying, but if there isn't a connection, I'm just pretendig listening, but, if we are closed I would talk to you about almost everything, and of course, some times I have this conversation with myself where I'm talking deep shit in my mind.
One time I was at work and I was really bored so I started dancing and I thought it was fun, asked my friend to dance and everyone stopped and asked it if was high. Normally I'm a pretty quiet person and keep to myself. People would describe me as a quiet kid in school, but then I just have a sudden need to talk at the speed of light to literally anyone or do something I absolutely would never to in a normal state of mind and sometimes I have to fight so hard to restrain myself because I know after five minutes I'll regret it so bad.
I'll randomly say like a quote from a movie. Then go back to whatever task I was doing.
It's like a random burst, hiccup...thing.
Ditto
Just the act of revealing too much of who we are is ridden with anxiety and regrets. I feel you.
When I’m around other introverts who are also feelers, it seems like I become more extroverted around them because they somehow make me open up and feel related?
OMG THIS IS ME
Me too! I feel more comfortable!
YES
I do this too. Probably seem snobby, but then make me feel comfortable around you then..?
Exactly
i think we as infjs go through these subtypes at different phases in our life according to the situations presented to us
This is exactly what I was thinking. Our base stays the same but I think these subtypes could be a sliding scale. I was introverted INTROVERTED younger but now my introversion is very low. I look like an extrovert to other types at most times. I was with an extroverted sensor for 18 years so my theory is that pushed me to use that function more. I do still need to rest and retreat sometimes though.
Correct..
Yeah I can honestly relate to that. After getting out of high school I became more extroverted.
aashna yup I agree
Shit that's true
ENFP here listening to all INFJ videos and realizing I treated my INFJ best friend wrong 😭😭😭 I want to run to her and hug her so much!
Awwe, okay I know I'm late to reply, but just do it! I'd feel important and valued if my friend came back, I would have also missed them everyday and talking it out to the fullest extent is what would make me feel that we both gave everything to keep the friendship. I hope your friendship workes out!!! God bleee
Here as an INFJ to say... she probably didn't really mind, unless you were _way_ off with your style of friendship
@@JacobGrim I luckily wasn't, I talked with her a lot. She knows how I meant some things and read my behaviour right. I'm socially awkward sometimes 😅 I'm happy ( and lucky ) she can read me so well. She's amazing 💕
.
@@danika9411 That's beautiful 😊💙
The three subtypes of ESTJs:
1. Hates Timmy.
2. Loathes Timmy.
3. Despises Timmy.
😂😂😂
Poor Timmy.. 😔
@@TaunellE he got what was coming to him 😤
I think, Timmy is just so misunderstood...
But seriously, wtf, Timmy?
"Once they begin communicating, they will hammer you over the head with what they know." -FJ
I feel this deeply.
Raising my hand, “guilty”
Same here! hahaha
My friends call me a scholar.. But I am not
same. i dont talk alot, sometimes my friends think that i dont talk at all, but once u get me going in a convo, i become extremely talkative
I am just apologizing on beforehand, and usually, they say it is okay. Sadly sometimes I get a lot of shit for it hahah. I also either get comments, like "Why do you talk so much? or "why aren't you saying anything?" And then I am just put in this conflict of what I am supposed to do? I guess Philosophy has helped me there, to just go the Golden middle-way between two extremes as Aristotle said. I talk and respond, but also listen to what people are saying. It is apparently working so... i guess my 22 years of trial and error i have finally managed to get somewhere.
I don't want to imply anything or bother you Bjorn, but are you perhaps Scandinavian, like Norwegian perhaps? It is the name you see as Bjørn is Bear in Norwegian. Another reason for why I know this is because I grew up in Norway. It might just be a coincidence hah.
As an INFJ I usually tend to act differently with everyone Like I can get sooo social and active when I'm excited or when talking to someone I feel at ease with ( especially kids lol) but then can turn extremely socially anxious when I don't know them it's a struggle
Im that way with my dog we just be having full conversations
I am an INFJ. I feel drained after social events, and whenever I have an event coming up I dread going to it and socializing. But when I do go, I either enjoy it, or I dislike it. Sometimes I feel more alone when I’m in a group compared to when I am truly by myself. Despite all of this anxiety, if I’m by myself too much I *need* socialization.
In new environments, I don’t talk to people. I talk to them when they talk to me, or talk when there is a shared interest, but starting a conversation is hard for me. And yet, I complain about not having friends.
I complain that I can relate to most people I meet, but none of them can fully relate to me. I complain that I don’t hang out with friends, even though I don’t make any effort to try and hang out with them. It’s like my personality contradicts itself.
I’ve started to watch your channel, and love all of your content, especially the INFJ content. Great video!
I would call me a middle INFJ, though that might just be my need to make everything even and balanced lol. I try not to gloat when it comes to me being smart, and I know this will make me sound full of myself, but when my teachers keep telling me I’m smart, I joke around and act like I’m confident. I’m sort of not confident, but I hope that my mask helps to make me truly a bit more confident. If I had that then I’d be pretty well off.
Wow. This is crazy, because this exactly how I am.
Painfull isnt it? Being alone, left behind, hated, despised, even if they tell u they love u and will never leave u. U just cant trust them. Not in the sense that they will understand. Not in the sense that u can put into words. The mask u put on everyday, every morning hurts u more and more. U try to take it off, but it sticks like thats the way u want the world to see u. The smile, quite, good listeners type.
@@Sweeps, you just described me word for word. It's reassuring to know there are other INFJs like this. I was going crazy thinking that there's something wrong with me, lmao
SnowAngel0303 One of us! One of us!
This is very interesting because I’m INFJ, and when most people meet me they are convinced I’m an extrovert, but that’s only cause I’ve worked on coming across as super confident for years. Truth is I constantly cancel group or people plans because it sounds real exhausting even though I want to be with people. I think a lot, but I can also communicate well and listen. I’m almost never sad when someone else cancels lol, cause yay alone time. 🙌🏼
The only people I make definite plans with are my immediate family. Everything else is a maybe. My family made Mondays Family Day every week when I moved out because they never saw me. I go to work, home, church, and Family Day. That’s it. Haven’t been grocery shopping since March. It’s too people-y in Walmart.
Same!
This spoke to me
Feels like I wrote this about myself 😂
Alana French - haha a true introvert if I ever heard one. 🙌🏼
I’m an INFJ and I feel like I’ve cycled through each of these types throughout my life kind of based on how much self confidence I felt at that point in time. Love your channel
So accurately stated! THIS was exactly my life experience as well🙌🙌🙌.
I relate so heavily to this!!
does anyone know how am i supposed to turn my introverted thinking , Ti or introverted intuition, Ni back on?! 😭😭
ive gotten so used to being the extrovert infj for like my whole life and like now i feel like i’ve lost..? or idk just how to activate it??
Me as an INFJ working in the service industry:
Work hour: [extrovert mode on]
Off hour: [normal mode on]
THIS!!! I have to straight up tell my family to back off when I come in the door. I love them, and I know they want to make small talk, but I have "small talked" all day long. It's like asking a maid to clean, or a painter to paint, or a chef to cook when they get home. I need some time to decompress. The worst part is that I feel guilty for decompressing because I know they love me, and that's why they wanted to "small talk" in the first place. I'm an INFJerk and I hate that about myself sometimes.
Lol essentially
omg thissss
I think we have a natural good capacity to adapt to people and situations.
Same
100% guilty of the whole "I know, I know what you're saying, let me talk" thing ambiverted INFJs do. I'm working on it, because even I know it's really annoying. I just have so many ideas and thoughts and I hate wasting time, so it's a struggle.
YES omg... especially growing up in a big loud family where I’m constantly fighting to be heard... it’s just a reflex to try to jump in, def have to work on that haha
I have the exact same!!
I am sooo guilty of this! It's just I have so many comments on what somebody is saying to me and I know I'll forget all of them by the time they finish what they're saying...
Yeah I’m guilty too 😞 I unintentionally cut people off or guess the word they were going to say next cause they were going slow. This might also be cause I have ADHD idk. Anyways I somehow found 2 introverted best friends that make me bold. :)
I wish there was a way to interrupt you in the middle of your comment because I already knew where you were going with it. :)
I used to be an extroverted INFJ as a teenager. A lot of energy put on the others, less on myself. That leaded me to personal and internal problems.
Then I focused all my energy on myself, and my self discovering. Therefore became an introverted INFJ. But helped me a lot to learn about myself. But always had in mind as a bigger goal to help others. But always thinking the following: "If I can't controll my life, neither I could help with other's". That was a lot of introspecting and self learning.
After all the process, now I am a healthier INFJ, an "ambibert" INFJ. I think of myself when it's necessary, but still put my energy on who DESERVE it. This path leaded me to have better relationships, less but closer friends at the end.
How funny... Im reading my own story line! I can understand you very very well.. And u know.. Wot u gonna heading towards next? Something interesting gonna come in ur life and u gonna realise Why you have done all those things in the past and wot was that all abt and everything under the universe ❤️. Happy to see such a person atleast in a random comment section
Me too. Same EXACT story. 😂
Same!!
100% I'm the Ambiverted INFJ. So many times I start smiling before the climax of someones story because I can guess what's about to happen. I've been called out on it a few times😅.
Also guilty of this 😆
Guilty of filling in other people 's sentences
YES I came here to say the same 😂 always laughing at jokes before the punchline 😅
Same here
Welcome to the Club 😂😂😂😂😂
If I'm the one in your shoes and the person telling is a girl "Cringes Expected" too as male package of being INFJ 😂😂😂😂
Super Introverted is the kid in class who never talks, but is very responsive if you ask for help.
🙂💔
I'm an INFJ. I like my alone time but I also get so much out of engaging conversations with people that I love and trust. It allows me to unload and I often have a need to feel understood and validated when it comes to dealing with problems big or small.
It comes back to that communication thing I guess.
I can go a week without seeing people but I also generally like to socialize at least once a week. Preferably in one on one or small groups with close friends.
Yes, everything you just said rings true for me also
Oh, yeah, small groups of friends - the only way to socialize! Throw in just one non-friend and I have to shut down and just listen especially when I know the person thinks less of me or likes to talk. Fine, have it.
I’ve had other MBTI people say, “But you’re so personable and friendly! I would never guess you’re INFJ.” Yeah, well, I can do that for a few hours, but then I need a day or so to recover.
It’s nice to see other people turn on and off.
Same. I don't dislike people, in fact I like being around them. But hells, I need my alone time or else I'll go insane! And I definitely prefer my close circle of family and friends to acquaintances or strangers.
Same !
Commication is huge for me. But Commication in general. I need to talk to get out of my head. Or what I like to call "the battle" that goes on inside my head. The two debate teams playing ping pong with endless streams of thought.
And than there's my need to commicate with really close ppl whom I love so that don't feel I'm ignoring them. They have needs too and I feel we should all be in the know of each other's needs.
Instead of "extroverted INFJ", maybe "social INFJ" would be a better term.
Yes, exactly!
ANFJ (Ambivert)? 🤣
Hi I'm a social introvert with social anxiety:D
definitely! I can be social with no problems but still love my alone time more than anything
@@Psychenfj Im p sure he got that and he was just stating like a better term for it
“Their FE is strong...”. Like, iron strong?
bruh xD
Nice lol
👏👏👏
I appreciate you
😂😂
I always burst into laughter when you mention INFJs and the deep abstract stuff that's in our mind & our sense of responsibility to communicate it for the good of everyone else 😂 I mean, that's it 😂 never have I felt so good-humoredly understood
"INFJs when they're really losing their mind about what's going wrong in their life, it's usually, like, some _thing_ is going haywire"
This is true for me on a spiritual level lol.
I RELATE!!
Yeah the subconcious Ni is going nuts like WTF IS HAPPENING - Whereas Fe is like EW sally is screwing everything haha
Yeah the subconcious Ni is going nuts like WTF IS HAPPENING - Whereas Fe is like EW sally is screwing everything haha
Yeah the subconcious Ni is going nuts like WTF IS HAPPENING - Whereas Fe is like EW sally is screwing everything haha
Does even an issue w a person become a THING? Is that why we get so upset? Ex: Dad dies of alcoholism...we go insane trying to figure out alcoholism? Or the emotionally unstable mind?
That moment when you feel that knowing your personality type is the best and worst thing that ever happened to you. Enlightening and confusing ...
for moi, is enlightening & condemning...lol
I’m an INFJ, and my daughter is an INFJ, and we are so opposite! It bothers her a lot that I have taken the MBTest 3 times and always come up INFJ. I just sent this video to her, because this explains a LOT! She’s the totally introverted one, and I’m the ambivert one.
Might want to make sure you’re taking one of the more reliable tests too, 16 personalities is not always the best source. Learning the functions is a must too.
Ambivert and introvert INFJs shouldn't be opposites... Maybe one of you is mis-typed?
I'm an introverted INFJ, but I mis-typed as INTP for years because I didn't know myself well enough to answer tests accurately.
@@justinb9612Do you recommend a reliable test? I've been wondering which test I could take to be sure of my type.
@@mongoose9851 thats my problem too. i took already 5 tests and i got 2 infjs 1 intj and 2 istjs
Wait til she finds out Hitler was also an INFJ, it will ruin her day.
Timestamps for the 3 types:
2:18 Very Introverted
5:39 Ambivert
8:09 Extroverted
Thank you 😊 which one are you?
@@JESUSLOVESYOU219 You're welcome! I think I'm an ambivert (erring a bit more toward the introverted side). What about you?
Violet Moxley ohhh same here x
I think you can see & understand from your test results, there are percentages listed, my introvert and judging scores are almost 100 percent, 80 percent intuitive, while my thinking and feeling scores are almost the same or balanced, so sometimes my results are intj or infj 🤔🤔🤔
Thank youuu
You are the most likeable person on UA-cam
have you met LiJo
That is because he plays as everyone
@@jj.jaypeg that's what us INFJ do lol
@@dotdashdotdash they once make a video together, it's on LiJo's channel
so why I am don't like how he talks? ;-;
as a infj I feel like I see things that others will never pick up on..
The infj I'm talking to was surprised I see the same things he does and always have. -enfp
Some of my friends understand that I am that person who picks up on the little things and even on hidden things that most wouldn't understand or see. It's even more awkward having to explain or even have another person watch the interaction between a friend and I because they believe that it is very weird based on what I'm doing. For example, I studied my best friends and how they move when at home so that I understand what their day to day life is like. It helps me understand when they're busy, free, or just doing a specific thing. My best friend Gordon and I smoke together, so I figured out the times when he wants to smoke based off of gut feeling rather than actually calculating as a specific time like others would. So they would watch me grab his weed and start rolling but would get confused because they didn't hear Gordon say anything to me before he left the room. When he comes back he says, "Oh! You did it. Perfect timing. Lets go smoke" and others will be completely confused on how I know. Understanding people's internal clocks, actions and thought process really helps make everything more efficient without having to say anything. It is 50/50 depending on the person. Either they love it because you understand them, their timing and how they like certain things or they hate it because they don't want others to know that much information and/or find it stalker-ish.
Ambivert INFJ- Yeah I’ve definitely come off as irritating and aloof at times to other people. I always thought the not listening and skipping ahead thing was ADHD though. And here I find out I am just annoying 😭😂
I have ADHD friends and they tend to do that a lot. So I think it's definitely playing into it.
Same:)
I am kinda ambivert ENFJ, and when I read the INFJ details I was like, hold on, this isn't right, why is this one accurate as well.
Lol ambivert infj w adhd here too. I've always wondered abt type correlation w adhd, cool to see anotha homie
I'm INFJ with ADHD and it often gets into collision with my traits. I'm trying to be organized but it's too much for my brain.
I think infj's can evolve from more introverted to less introverted and with people they know well (and accept them as they are) be even very extroverted. Infj's need harmony around them to be able to open up. A very dominant and critical Sally (yeah, i know who she is cause i am an infj😀) can cause an infj to become very introverted i guess.. (it would be easier to explain this in my own language...🤯)
I agree, I’m an INFJ & a very guarded person but, I’m open & bubbly if I trust you.
@@221BSam ditto 😊
💯
We’re interested in people and our problem isn’t social anxiety as Frank was saying, it’s the overwhelming, draining information you get from being in social situations. If we’re not overwhelmed we enjoy company. So I guess with family and close friends we already know a lot about them, how they’re likely to be feeling, this isn’t coming at us as new information to read. That’s what I’ve assumed is the difference anyway.
Yes, this, exactly. I’m super outgoing and boisterous with people I know well. But it takes forever to get to that point.
Yep. Ambivert INFJ. I've been called a know-it-all who must always be right by my hubby and family members, especially as I've gotten older and a bit more extraverted. It is good to step back and realize that other people process their experiences differently and who am I to interfere or judge. Even if we can predict certain outcomes and behaviors, it doesn't mean it's our place to always point them out.
I relate so much with the bad listener part. Everytime my sister starts telling a story and using so many unnecessary details and long explanations, I either get really antsy or just tune it out entirely.
Bethany Gardner honestly me with my parents 😩
Me too, always ask the person yes I got that , the key points plzzz🙂
Oh my gosh! Yes! It is so annoying to me when a person goes on and on and I already got their point in the first few seconds and have my answer ready! I’m just impatiently waiting to give my answer and wish they would shut up long enough to hear it!
Yea I like bullet points.
it happens to me when my brother speaks about his minecraft's quests
I'm the second type and it annoys me as well! I don't want to interrupt others, I'm just trying to save everyone's time. (facepalming myself because of myself)
Me too. Especially if you are thinking of doing something different and important yet they are there telling you about something you know where is really heading
I get angry with myself because i don't wait and listen. Its like i have a talk show and i know all the answers. I have great friends btw.
Omgosh.. I found my tribe!! Do you think two INFJ would constantly interrupt each other and get annoyed? Or understand each other so deeply we wouldn't have to finish?
Your examples are so spot on. I avoid big parties not because I’m afraid to talk to people but because so much talk about the weather exhausts me...a lot! And I don’t feel it’s worth it.
Because we're bored of talking about nothing.
Being a single, very introverted INFJ makes you think of dating like that horrible, terrible thing 👏 so much trouble and energy investment heeeelll no ⚰️
This is so me right now 😂 #selfpartnered
The absolute truth ..
They must date INFJs, much easier
Homer Jay Simpson Good ide! Thank you 🙏 😄
Live Long and Prosper ✌
Jupp this is Me also! Feel you
👍👍👌✌
I was a very extraverted INFJ as a kid until I got bullied. At that time, I thought everyone were my friends and the hurt made me recoil inside my own mind. I've recently restarted being extroverted and opening myself back to the world.
I relate so strongly to this.
Same situation with me
Ihaveachancenow
@@naturally_roisin ialmostgaveupyesterday
@@criss3619 yousavedmylore
lol yeah I'm a major introvert. Just the other day I saw a lady delivering goodies to a neighbor and the two were having a conversation. And all I could think about was the energy it would take out of me to do such a thing. I expressed this to my mom who was beside me. She misunderstood my introversion as misanthropy (as always but I don't blame her). But I assured her, "I would LOVE to do nice things for people, mom. I just don't wanna talk to them!" xD
> ambivert infjs are not the greatest listeners
> acts like they got everything under control
> acts like theyre smart
HAHAHAHAHAHA me
Same he just described me
Hehehe 😁
Oh, so guilty of jumping ahead in conversations.
Aah this jus hurts cuz I think it might be true, pff I’m still smart dafuq u guys talking about haha
Tracy Jekyll he said that and I literally turned to an invisible camera like 😬😐 haha damn! I already know, but hate to hear it coming externally as well as just internally as usual haha it’s just so hard for me to listen through a whole shpeel with ppl when I friggen get it, just get to the point! And to be fair, it’s not necessarily an act when our intuition is usually right. Even before people realize it themselves! But who has the time to unscramble that type of insight to someone who would never understand. It’s hard enough to unscramble it to myself!
"Not good listeners"
That was the only thing I heard as I was reading the comments 😂 I feel so called out!
7:03 It's the "I saw it coming 6 months ahead" effect
I think that there are more types of INFJ ... 🤔divided not only by extroversion ... because I can find myself in all three groups, depending on the circumstances, the people I am with and the topic of conversation...and overall mood.
Mood! It matters so much!!
yyyyyyyyyyyyyep!
We can adapt tho. I think when we asses the mood, we can adapt and be more extroverted.
Gotta remember that there’s 7 billion people in the world and we are all different in our own unique ways
good, its not only me, but it confuses me.
I'm extroverted in situations only because I don't want anyone to feel as awkward as I do. I spend all my energy looking for the wallflowers that are lonely because I can physically feel their angst and I have to take care of them. I try to make everyone happy and comfortable by adapting to their personality then I go home wired and exhausted. I spend my time wishing someone would want to know me but at the same time, I know I'll never give them the chance to see all of me, only small pieces and never the whole. I'm a contradiction in terms and it's exhausting. The blessing and the curse of an INFJ; absorbing the emotions of everyone around you and analyzing every single person you come in contact with. While everyone else is thinking what a nice person Timmy is, I'm seeing a kid that has been abused and is acting out in various ways and will become a serial killer in ten years.
fr though. for some reason i just cant seem to trust anyone i meet, even my 'close friends'. i give them bits and pieces of my life, never the whole thing. idk why but no one seems like they would understand or care and it just makes me feel better if i dont burden other people with issues im facing. but at the same time i feel shitty if they dont check up on me or realise that something is going on, because its so easy for me to tell if someone feels a bit off. so because of that i end up wanting someone who can see under the lines and i get upset if my friends dont. totally get my expectations up(completely my fault) and get dissapointed in the end. like TF is wrong with me, dont be wishy washy, stick to one thing. you cant have both. :(
Omg this is in all honesty one of the most relatable comment I've seen out here and it does make me feel a little relieved to know I'm not the only one feeling this way :and doing stuff like that :""D
I hate it when I'm in a group, peole are talking, there's a newbie and they're being left out!! I'm just the same - have to make the stranger feel
comfortable in a new situation, even if I'm in the same boat!!!
@@melaniebowesman-jones6056 YESSSSS OMG :000 wow hello xD
Thank you!! Me too but hubby has been convinced for years that he’s an introvert and I’m an extrovert because of this. Recently I said, dude you’re not an introvert and he reevaluated and came to the same conclusion as I have. I’m also glad he’s talking about the bell curve. I’m so tired of everyone thinking it’s one or the other. It’s a sliding scale and can move throughout your life.
Hello! I just want to say that your channel has really helped me out!
I am an INFJ (realised from your video that I’m most likely an ambiverted INFJ) and have taken a lot of tests and researched cognitive functions.
Lately, I believed that I may be an ENFJ instead as someone told me that I’m quite extroverted and my Fe is very high. However, although I can speak to others if spoken to, I believe that I’m really awkward and like to be alone (yet, ironically, I also feel pretty lonely and want people to like me - hah!)
But, I’ve realised that I tend to mirror the people around me. For instance, if people are very lively I’ll perk up a bit - if people are more quiet, I relax and tone down.
But, additionally, if there is someone a lot shyer than me, I’ll appear more extroverted because I don’t want them to feel left out. I’ll quickly take on a motherly/caretaking role so that they feel included. I think that’s because I hate feeling left out, so I make sure that they don’t too.
I thought that because of this, I may be an ENFJ instead as I believed that INFJs are supposed to be quiet and introverted (which I am most of the time). But, this video made me realise that INFJs can fall onto a spectrum of introversion/extroversions.
I’m sorry for my long message. I just really love your channel and your INFJ focused videos! You’re really helping me to discover and learn about my type, which is really interesting.
Thank you! I hope you have a great day :)
I’m the same as you.
I’m a INFJ-T Heyoka Empath.
Nope.. I'm exactly as you describe too.
And I've taken the test 4 times. Same every time..
Does anyone else love the little laugh he does when he says something dangerously on point?
I come off extroverted to alot of people at first. Because I tend to be really loud and hyper with quiet people/introverts like me. But when people do get to know me, especially my friends, they start to realize I'm an introvert because they only see me like 2x a year. No joke, even before covid I've only met my bestfriend twice in 2019 LOL
I feel a little less strange, seeing someone behave so similar to how I do!
hahahahahhaha same gurl, same!!!
I turn on the extrovert when in group meetings or for presentations. Also, when somebody just needs to volunteer to get things over with, I'll get it over with real quick. I hate fake shyness and I see it all around me, I believe. But, my true happiness is away from the crowd, no mandatory meetings, a desk away from the hub, and not having to entertain or indulge everyone else.
When you talked about the extroverted/introverted INFJ, I laughed hard😂 I wasnt sure what subtypes of INFJs were until you named them and then you mentioned the 2nd one and I was like Yep that's me😂 Seriously tho one thing, When we interrupt the speaker it's unintentional because we honestly know where this goes and we are not trying to act smart we are just trying to speed up the process that is taking place. And when I try to listen even tho I already know where this is going I get this boredom feeling that makes me want to change the subject. So Im kinda stuck with "Yeah, Okay I got it lemme explain it to you" interruption way😂😂
I think its important to realize though that you dont always know where its going and that no matter how confident you feel in your Ni, you owe the other person a sincere listening ear especially if you are initiating THEM to talk to YOU. Im more of an introverted infj and my cousin is more of an ambivert. If she can tell there is something wrong she'll proceed to ask me(typical infj needing to be the therapist and confidant which is absolutely fine), I'll start talking, she'll jump to conclusions, and because half the time her conclusions is actually nothing close to what im actually concerned about and because i hate being misunderstood i shut down. Then weeks later when she realizes what the actual problem was she gets mad at me for "being secretive" and "not letting her in". I've sort of decided to look for a listening ear elsewhere because being misunderstood is the bane of an infjs existence and when an infj thinks they are are right, there is no convincing them otherwise; they'll have to discover it for themselves which is why i dont try to talk over her and re explain myself when she jumps to conclusions because in her head her conclusion is absolute. I know i do this sometimes too when friends ask for advice and I've also been proved that my "hunches" are not always right. Ni works best when you actually take in all the information first. When i listen to everything that has to be said, only then am i creepily accurate at predicting what can/will happen.
If my friends needs to rant, the don’t usually need me to actually listen and I tend to zone out. If they are asking for advice, I have to force myself not to disassociate. Human interaction is not my forte. But my friends like asking for advice. It’s easier in a message because I can reread until I’ve gotten everything down and they got it all out in one go.
This is so me 😂😂 I know it’s rude to assume and I can hold myself back, so most people think I’m a good listener. But really my inner dialogue is coming up with ways to solve the other persons problems etc wondering why they can’t see the obvious. But at the same time I can understand them and put myself in their shoes and empathise. But again at the same time I just wanna go back to thinking about myself and “who cares about anyone else” but then I wanna help them but usually that’s to boost my own ego? Ahhh I just contradict myself so much 😂
i find it almost painful to listen to someone talk about what i already know
1000% yes. I don't interrupt people because I don't want to look like a know it all..i just see where it's going 5 seconds into the question and know how to tackle it. The faster i can address your concern the faster I can move onto the next concern. I always worry people get mad when I interrupt. I can't help it because I already know what you're thinking.
This is the first time I've heard someone talk about extroverted INFJs and how we struggle with knowing who we truly are and it's super relieving to know I'm not alone in that feeling lol
Definitely an extroverted INFJ. I switched between all of these at different times, and I especially tend to get typed by 16 personalities as an INFP or ENFP because, as a concert pianist, I've been forced to develop my Se and Fi beyond where INFJs usually do in order to becone a better performer , but at the end of the day I'm at my best when I can rely on introverted intuition and create huge, weblike long-term plans and stories that often stretch over a long time frame, which is much closer to the combination of introverted intuition and thinking of the classic INTJ and INFJ.
*this is a lot of extraverted sensing you're asking me to do, I'm not a fan* - my answer from now on to anyone trying to get me to participate in any social interaction whatsoever
Slavomíra Nemčíková too good
I thought the same. I will definitely be using that.
At first I was thinking that responding to this was too much in the way of extraverted sensing for me to do and then I thought, “no- I must validate these beings. They are my people. And together we can take a stand.”
Same. I hate it so much, just let me live in my head please, thanks.
Slavomíra Nemčíková this is my answer to every zoom meeting I’m being asked to join......
3 INFJ types:
-Unhealty
-Even more unhealthy
-So unhealthy that she thinks she is healthy
JadeCeci please don't call me out like that ⚰️
hey stop it... hahahah.. on point.
😥
INFJ T+, INFJ T, INFJ T- I grade myself on a curve 😆
@@mariek.474 😂
I believe all of these subgroups are within every INFJ. I just think the level of consciousness in the individual determines what traits are outwardly and inwardly expressed.
From what I’ve heard, INFJs can be like chameleons adapting to their surroundings. I’ve always felt that I was capable of blending in with different groups of people. I’ve never been in a room though and thought I was the smartest person in it lol. While Ni and Ti tend to be the functions I favor, my type of job makes me have to flex my SE so it isn’t difficult to use. I would just prefer not to use it if the moment doesn’t require it.
The chameleon thing...I've been accused of not having a personality because it just started running together like a sloppy rainbow.
I agree 100% for me it depends on my mood mostly
Agreed except secretly I typically see myself as a smartest person in the room.
I agree, I can also prepare, mentally, for an event with lots of people
Yeah, I've been calling myself a chameleon for years now.
I tested INFJ/ENFJ when I was 30 & was required to be MBTI tested for work. I have read that INFJs are the most extroverted of the introverts. Truly, I was much more extroverted when I was younger & had to be vivacious & cheerful (a variation of cool & attractive) in order to "fit in"; now that I'm older, I can say booger off to people & live like the hermit I was destined to be hahaha... but I AM writing the book that'll solve the world's problems.... 😉😁
It me
Jessica Thompson Me too!
That is the most INFJ sentence I've ever heard... I'm intrigued
@@tiaa2078 🤣🤣😉😊💖
@@sandraholding8456 💖
I'm very introverted infj. I could be home forever with my dogs and husband and kids only and be perfectly happy. I love my husband and kids and open up to them often, perhaps to their annoyance at times lol. I do like short superficial interactions with strangers, just enough to engage and them to smile while I run errands. Then I hurry back to my house in the country far enough away that I don't get pop-ins.
I love supermarket line conversations. Then I can leave!
I'm just a teenager but this is quite similar to what I imagined my future to be
I recently noticed I interrupt people by coming with some weird analogy to tell them "I got you, I get it" and they are like: "yeah, well actually no but..." and I realized that's annoying. Now I try to listen all the way through and actually pay attention to what they are saying. I've forgot how to social during this quarantine😂
Bestwordseversaid
ur eyes r like
🌝🌞🌚🌞🌝🌞🌚👀👁👁👀👀👁👀👀👁👁👀👀
Thats pretty INFJ
He has the look that's for sure. ♥️
The eyes are always killing and ressurecting me like a thousand times throughout a short ~10 min. video
Word
His eyes are eyes...? I don't get it
@@mama_5830 Do you see the emojis? I think it's supposed to mean his eyes are very expressive.
I'm naturally very introverted, but I had a job for decades where I HAD to learn to talk to people & forced me to be very extroverted, so even though I'm definitely not a 'people person', I can now talk to just about anyone with no problem... but at the same time, I don't really WANT to talk to them, which is weird...
I'm an introvert, I enjoy going out with my friends. Im a normally loud guy when im around people im comfortable with. When im surrounded by strangers im quiet and keep to myself.
@@abrahambeadner7696 you sound like a dope guy
FRANK
Before watching the vid, I just wanna applaud you for making us laugh while understanding our messy selves. Thank you and we will alwaya be here to support you!
-A fellow INFJ
@Lini ASMR 😊😊😊
this is wholesomeee
@@sea_of_love yeahh I'm glad I stumbled upon Frank James 😁😁😁
@@sea_of_love I never thought I'd meet another cool INFJ that's also doing a great job at explaining to us who we are.. The visible and invisible parts of us..
YES, thank you FJ! The laughter is invaluable! :)
I’m an introvert, prefer to communicate through my writing, but I can go to a social event and fake it and charm the heck out of people but it takes a lot out of me. As I’ve gotten older it’s easier for me to socialize.
Throwing it back to the older videos-styyyleeee 😸 just FJ in his computer chair talking about being an INFJ. Love it.
Yes the others are funny but I learn from these
I feel like I have went through all 3 types of these INFJs throughout my life, but definitely more ambiverted. People believe I am an extrovert, as I am social in public, but I prefer a lot of alone time to think and process.
exactly the same for me!
I am an extroverted INFJ. What I can tell you is , it's a lot of masking and performing, followed by days of ghosting everyone. I will be in my room and not say word one to people, not answer my phone, email or have any human contact. I exhaust myself.
I have met so many people like me who love cars but don't drive. Why? It means interacting with road rage situations, and I don't like that sort of confrontation. I would just let everyone go first and then feel bad or worry constantly.
I know l creep people out. I actually figured out I was an INFJ after being told I was like Marilyn Manson in Betty Crockers body. Yes, he is an INFJ extrovert type as well.
Thissss....
Had to spend a couple of days at a friend's because of some issues with my own apartment. A lot of talking and all... It really drained the hell out of me. But i just had to adapt to the situation. So, everyone who met me at that time would mark me as an introvert.
Fast forward to two weeks later after my apartment issue was resolved, i rushed back home that very day because i needed the quiet comfort of my room. Didn't contact anyone or leave my room for days.
"Once they start talking..they will hammer you over the head"
omg I'm so sorry to everyone I've ever talked to 😂😂😂😂
Now that you mentioned it, I felt bad to the people I converse with~ 😅
Not me... I’m the one listening for 20 minutes... seriously hurry tf up like talk so slow and I have work/life to do. I’m super patient... to a point! 😏
"This is so much energy."
Yes.
"I'm gonna have to deal with so much random bullcrap coming at me."
Y E S .
Found which one I am.
Dude, all the time! I got this bs at work right now. I can read situations so fast its like yep...i see this is going south. Someone at work is intimidated by me cuz i was the quiet hard worker that nobody saw coming. Worked my way up and this chick is pissed cuz by not kissing ass i got where i needed to be. She resorted to saying straight to our boss i was talking shit about her. Funny thing was, all my coworkers tell me im too QUIET all the time and that im pretty much doing my job and not yackin. When my boss approached me with this crap i was very confused. She kept saying i hate her and i never said anything. All i said was, it would be nice if you would do your job instead of ditching me to do it for you and you kiss the bosses rear as im doing both our jobs. She started giving me dirt looks, literally finding more ways to avoid me, and she started saying shit to my boss who caught on what she was doing. Im literally waiting for the 2nd random wtf is going on with u two. I got to a point where i went full on shutdown. Stopped doing as much and wouldnt do her stuff, started getting defiant, and rly not talk to anyone or got snarky or sarcastic, or rebelling. Yaaaa. There were alot of unfairness towards me and once i throw down i had it, i got the oh your talking smack. So, can an infj be intimidating? Some say i am and some say im just a little teddybear. Odds be in their favor upon approaching. Lol but rly tho.
@@snoozebutton23 I think that since us INFJs don't say a whole lot all the time, when we do and we have something to say that's kind of blunt, everyone acts like it's a big deal when it's really not lol
Tfs wrong with u?
I have went through the process from being extrovert INFJ to becoming introvert as I have aged. I still try to sit on my smart and hide it. I do believe I know where you are going a step ahead of you (really ruins TV and movies). I don't listen but am told by everyone I am a great listener. I fuzz into 4 spirals while trying to keep up with you.
There are many T people in my family and being smart with people doesn't hold a lot of ground. Now I have to hide that I know it all. I lost a lot of interest in people. Getting into plants. Trying to be positive cause it creates positive. Get time to myself as much as possible. I am exhausted. My mom tells me wait until you are old. I'm not 40 yet. I guess after 50 I will get a better appreciation for my S that I am losing.
Don't take me as down, I am the happiest I have been my entire life. I know it sounds negative. I learned I am enough just 2 years ago. I have young children who hold my heart. I'm proud of myself. I'm an addict but I am clean. I am not suicidal.
Oh kid you not I am finally happy. People pleasing almost killed me. I got a phone call while writing this, shifted focus and who knows where this started
Ok, thank you for your thoughts. As always I enjoy hearing about MBTI.
I lean more toward being an extroverted infj when I'm around people I know really well, and become less so when I'm around new people or aquaintences. I describe it as being "outgoing" and it's like an on/off switch for me.
I’m a more extroverted infj in that I crave new social experiences even if they aren’t super easy or relaxing for me. If I only hang out with introverted friends I actually get frustrated because I then have to take on the role of the friend who convinces others to go out on the town with me, and if they finally agree they won’t dance they just stand as wallflowers. So I need extroverted friends too. A lot of people think I’m extroverted when they meet me out somewhere, but I can’t keep up the act for long 😅
Same, that's why I have more extro friends
i can relate haha
You might like hanging out with a ENFJ. We're social butterflies who love being supportive. They'd try new stuff with you while also giving you space when you need it.
Until now, I considered myself an INTJ, but in reality I am an INFJ 5W4. The most interesting thing is how I realized that I am INFJ: listening to Nuages - Closer song and thinking deeply: everyone's heart is delicate, everyone wants kindness, love and understanding in their hearts, everyone on earth is like that, and that is why I thought that the heart of people is delicate, which made me realize that I am actually an INFJ.
You were feeling SASSY when you made this , weren’t ye?? 😂
😂😂😂
Athena Pearl wasn’t he, though? He never listens to me when I say this, but....
Everyone is surprised when I share that I am an introvert. They even argue with me lol I can be extroverted and do it well, but it has a time stamp
Same!
I'm very aware of that time stamp myself BtheLightas so as a result I've been working on social fillers for when I'm completely burnt-out. My favorite social filler is laughter alongside smiling. I'm not gonna say it's easy because when I'm exhausted I feel low-energy to the point where I need to take a nap 😴 but in those moments I make sure I become the best actor I can be in order to carry my weight as an adult in a social/professional environment. Filler laughs and smiles can be used every other sentence to show that you're interested in the conversation and that you're listening. If you have any questions lmk I have alot of game when it comes to this topic.
Thank You for punch me right between my eyes for showing I'm really annoyng because sometimes I just act like I have everything under my control instead of really listen to the others, and being more open to listen and to receive help for the others. Like, really! What I just loved about had found out that I'm an INFJ is that I'm more conscious about myself, so I can actually understand myself and work to improve myself more, and your channel has been a greeeeaaat helper for me! (Brazilian INFJ talking from here, Thank u for your help!) 💕
The reason why two people with the same type can seem different is because the human psyche depends on two things - nature and nurture. MBTI only tells us about the nature part.
What do you mean by nurture?
@@post-humangod2575 One's upbringing, the environment they grew up in, and how they have ended up choosing how to act in different social situations based on their life experiences. Seriously recommend you to go to CSJ's channel and watch the first 2 seasons.
@@post-humangod2575 exterior factors
@@Lucky-ed4pk give an example please.
Looks like comments containing CSJ's name won't be visible to anyone so I had to edit and abbreviate it lol. It's all good tho, he's just kinda controversial around here.
I literally dropped everything to watch this lol
Me too. XD
narratee x me2 lol 😂
LOL same wow
🤣🤣🤣
Isn't that a given? :)
You don’t know how much of a therapist you are to me, FJ! ♡ I was raised by two extroverts and thus taught how to “properly socialize” and it’s like most of my life, in social settings I learned to be on autopilot extrovert INFJ mode. It wasn’t so bad because I could just stay in my room for the next 30 days after some socializing. But now that I’m a mom and inevitably always around with kids (not yet school age kids), I’m always using my inferior extroverted sensing and now I’ve been spending late nights with my therapist FJ and Google. I feel like everything in me is so wrong and messed up. From now on I’ll try to learn to put off that autopilot mode because it’s messing up my ideals as a mom. Thank you so much!!!
Love your voice!
INFJs can be really extroverted once they have enough time to be with themselves.
"stay cool and attractive" lol bold of you to assume I'm attractive in the first place
Getting right to the source of my infj conflict. My test keeps switxhing me between infj and enfj. Crowds make me nervous but i love chatting in small groups. Idk.
U know he’s an INFJ when he lists his camera setup and music in the description 🤗 creativity and helping others
I am very introverted haha! I’m tired easily after social activities. And is very picky with gatherings .
Same. Doesn't matter if it was a layed back or energized (positively or negatively) ... Still very draining on me. Will go to family functions a lot quicker than one of friends... Always very happy to get a notice the function was cancelled 🤸🙌 . I don't except but a couple of people as close friends. All others I keep at a distance of just aquatints. No problem putting people out of my life for good 👍 . I don't have the mental energy to deal with a lot of BS 😒 . First thing my brain does is assess people for what their feeling and if first time seeing them personality/character reveals. At times I can listen quietly (especially if your not one of my very few people in my trust zone). In my trust zone... Then I love you and I'm here to help AKA get quickly on your nerves by jumping right into the issue with answers or suggestions to help rescue you 🥺😁💪💪... Because I feel a responsibility and a loyalty to you to pick your chin up/lift your heart up/fix your situation/save you from a bad decision/or to glue the breaks in your heart back together ✊ ... If it makes one mad lol then 😂😂😂 great!! I tried . Now I can go recuperate from the exhausting encounter 💁🏼♀️
I can also seem very outgoing... That's because I'm very stressed and feel that I have to be to get through the social occasion (like work for example or my child's school function or a social gathering) ... Truth is... I'm trying to survive so I can retreat back into my own little world 🙌💁🏼♀️🙍♀️ where I'm actually very content to be... Home no place like it 🥰
I’m definitely the super introverted type INFJ, being social is exhausting. I would say that even though I don’t use my extroverted feeling very often, if I have a reason to use it, I can use it well. Maybe that’s just because I am constantly getting silent reads on everyone in the room, even if I never end up using those reads, which gives me the ability to use it when I want to.
"Always acting like they're so smart... I'm sick of that crap!!!" Hahaha love this part XD !! (P.s. I feel personally attacked by this truth lol)
I am super introverted because I have a soft voice, the amount of energy it takes for me to raise my voice uuugh pass
Why is everyone so deaf? Do I need to yell for people to hear me? Like screw off, I can hear whispers.
Help me. Im surrounded by loud people and it drained me.
Same, same
So relatable.
ikr !!
This explains a lot. I’m definitely the Ambivert because I always get almost 50% on the Extroversion factor for the Big 5. Also… he’s right, I’m not a good listener but I’m aware and working on it 😅
hey hey, i only "yeah yeah, got it" in conversations with my boyfriend. he has to tell every detail in a story and it takes him like 20 times longer than necessary to get to the point. also, i can figure out the point in the first three seconds. ;-p
are we ... dating the same person?!
Ughh me too
Hahaha yup!!
Exactly the same situation with me INFJ and my boyfriend ENFP😀🤪
For real, some people don’t know how to talk. I don’t wanna listen to extra blah blah nonsense! Lol
i always excitedly make plans to go out with my friends but when it's time to go i wish it to be cancel or just cancel it all lol
Same!
When I had friends I preferred when things were spontaneous, because when we made plans I was all hyped but I might feel different when the thing actually took place. I don't like when my mood has time to change for the worse!
I grew up in a family of extroverts, and thought this was the way I should be as well. It was hard for me to distinguish between introversion and depression.
"I know what's going on here". This is one of my worst traits. Only in full adulthood have I figured out that I am actually a moron and that I often have no idea what's going on. So embarrassing. Sorry to everyone I knew earlier in life.
Tri S honestly same 😅😅
Oh god I feel this. I recently went through a rather humbling period and am realizing just how often I’m a moron. And then accepting that because perfectionism is a freaking disease
No doubt I'm an Amivert INFJ-A. Smack dab in the middle. Aka: outgoing loner.
same
literally me
Felt that, I have a small group of friends but we are always going out and having fun
@@andifone2484 same here. Got a small circle of buddies that enjoys hanging out.
I don't know how familiar the other INFJ's are about that but it sometimes happens to me when I'm taking part in a discussion with someone and the other person is complaining about something and I've already made and told my conclusion however I don't want to be impolite and interrupt them so I still say or ask something about the topic. But meanwhile I'm getting irritated because I can't jump to another thing which I've already planned to talk about even before the beginning of the conversation. 😂
I needed this video because I am an infj and an introvert but a lot of people describe me as a social butterfly
“Who’s Sally?”
Timmy’s sister, duhhhhh 💁🏻♀️
I’m definitely the middle one. Which makes your rant about know-it-all INFJs feel like a stab 2 the heart 🗡 Drag me harder next time, why don’t ya 😪
Lol my dog. Her name is Sally. 🐶♥️
Holly N Same here
Yes Holly, I commented before reading any other comments. “Timmy has a sister”, was my first thought too.
Timmy's sister...ok...is this a thing... cuz we could start a cartoon series. Giggling 😁
Hi Holly! 👋
Just a quick note to thank you for sharing the news of your upcoming wedding! How exciting!! 👰💗🎉 Seven years together is a major accomplishment in itself! Congratulations to you both!! 👏💞 An October wedding sounds absolutely lovely! Autumn is a beautiful season. (I've always been quite fond of October in particular because it's my birth month!) 😊 Warmest wishes to you and your fiance!! May your love continue to grow stronger and more meaningful each and every day!! ❤❤
I’m definitely the first type- the type of social anxiety that we feel is so true, the uncomfortable feeling we get comes from the draining of energy from being around so many people. I don’t feel self-conscious, just completely drained by the presence of that many people
I’m a “literally anything else” kind of person. I’m embarrassed to admit, that I’m going to deliberately skip out on a major event in my sphere of life, just to avoid the social aspect of it.
Don't we all?... ;)
I missed my friend’s wedding because of social anxiety that I just could not overcome so I get that.
BasilBaby but don’t you know what? I went through this a lot at Frank’s age, and younger, but I realized that if I feel this way, and I’m working against what I feel in some effort to feel “normal”, I’m not really honoring or appreciating the value of introverts in the world, and if we exist, and we feel this way, just stop trying to be something your not, and trust that you will have all the friends you actually need, somehow, even if you don’t know how, exactly, by being true to yourself. It’s solved everything. Can you believe it? I honored all of those feelings, without kind of, judging myself for it, and it worked. You innately know, somehow, exactly what you need when you need it and your brilliant brain has a way of getting it for you. In YOUR OWN way. I just spent the first 30+ years of my life trying, without even realizing it anymore, to still “fit” in, even though I adopted what I believed was a moral opposition to conforming to the expectations of the external world (at least from college and beyond; before college I was painfully shy in school, and sort of outgoing at home, during college I was very outgoing). I didn’t even realize I was still swimming upstream. Relax, be and do whatever it is that feels best, not what others think may be best. Not what the external world or your super-social-neighbor-who-literally-has-parties-every-other-night-and-he’s-34 does or says. Trust yourself to know how to make you feel at peace. Listen to yourself.
I happily skipped prom by going to college early lol. It was my sole reason for advancing at the time. No regrets
That's so true. From childhood (since I can remember) I was watching movies or cartoons and trying to figure out with what type of character I can compare myself. I see - this one is like that friend, that one is like this relative... And I just can't find myself. Very rearely. The same was with people - I can adjust to them, but not really relate. These video's and understanding better my type and problems I'm dealing with are so eyes opening and helping in life.
Ave,,,beensadithoughtiwascrasypeoplealwasesaidiwassomuchibeilevedthem
I can kinda “turn on” the extroversion and play to be like really outgoing and caring and engaged in conversation and stuff but it really empties my battery to a point that I am unable to properly talk to anyone for a significant amount of time