I'm 64 and growing old alone with my two cats, no kids or grandkids and didn't want any but am quite happy and have everything I need. No fears at all & worrying only makes things worse so think positive. I think more about life and not illness and death.
Yesss!!!! Gosh, so many think that getting old and being alone is pathetic - no, it is not. Have seen too many couples living together who cannot stand each other, kids who are leeches, grandkids who are disrespectful...friends with similar situation to dump it on ya, because they are afraid to be alone. Worse case scenario, you get ill and no one around to help ya and die alone and maybe it is days before anyone find you - but this is a one-time event, ( we will all die one day, no matter what ya do..panic button or no) but you could live alone for another 15-20 years happy living your alone life...does not mean no visitors, no social gathering ( when the pandemic is over or controlled), just that it is nice to go to a quiet home.
@@jillsinanan6777 My dad died alone in his apartment and they estimated 24 hours. His cat started howling and wouldn't quit until someone did a welfare check. Me I live alone, am introverted but have a few friends and things to do and do get out and I'm quite happy and don't feel sorry for myself in the least.
I worry about not being able to take care of my personal needs. Like the things I do every day.....sit in front of makeup mirror and pluck the chin hairs. I want to always be able to take care of my hair and my body. I also worry about winding up in a nursing home and being a victim of abuse. I've heard horror stories on this subject.
Also I would like to add as of Oct 2020 there's no telling what the future holds for so many people. Not sure what avenue I will take. I hope the best for all of you.
So true! Im from India. Having an 'adrakwali chai'. Its a ginger laced jaggery tea. Super taste . Super rich antioxidant detox drink! Thank you for talking about the salient issues of growing older all alone.
I’m 56 and these things cross my mind. Outliving my husband, he has diabetes and asthma, we have no children, no family near me, both parents have passed, estranged from my brother for years, being alone, running out of finances, ending up in a Nursing home and dying alone. It’s scary. I try to not think about it, but I do.
You are not alone. There are lots of articles on our website that deal with loneliness and living alone - If you go to www.sixtyandme.com/start you can learn all about our other channels!
Its so true that as you get older esp mid sixties, these topics come to mind as a natural progression in life so open conversations on them are welcome. Its of comfort to know we are not alone in some of our thoughts.. two decades ago it never came to mind ... and nice to know that as we enter this age which we have never been before we are right on track with out plans, thoughts or fears and we are not alone in them. Appreciate you dear Margaret for your time and efforts in communicating on all topics relevant with kindness and care....
Have always enough stuff in your house to help yourself! In zurich there is dignitias you pay 5000 euros and they give you a nice smoothy and you sleep for ever!!!!!
I love my life living alone but I am blessed that I have friends around me that we care for one another, I am a 65 yr. old divorced woman. I am grateful for my life because of what the Lord has done and helped me to take care of my mom who died of ALS 2 yrs ago. I live simple I'm not wealthy but I have what I need. I am blessed.
Hello I am so sorry if this sounds weirds but you wrote such a nice and wonderful comment on here and I like your comment. I can tell you're a very positive person. If it's okay with you I'd love to be friends
I am 55 years but have always looked to women older for inspiration, guidance and wisdom. Your videos resonate Margaret as you exude such positive authentic energy. We all want a friend like you...encouraging, uplifting and so switched on to what matters in life.
My biggest fear is, well, losing my 90 something parents, and my siblings and their spouses. I'm not afraid of being alone, just not having my dear family around me.
Great topic. Ultimately, we all die alone. Making peace with that is the best thing we can do. And, regarding worrying about how you'll be remembered? Well, it won't really matter, will it? And, as the adage goes, it's not my business what others think of me :)
Very well said. Spend too much time worrying what if. Number one to living well is your health. Look after what else left of you. Just because it's 'normal' seeing people going to nursing home or frail blah blah blah etc. It doesn't mean you're one of the club member of a nursing home. Life passes by real fast. God bless everyone. Do what you can.
Shanna - Brilliant comment! It is EXACTLY how I feel and what I always tell females, who worry more about what others think instead of carrying on with their lives and being self-contained. Bravo!
@@simplyrise930 Those places are such warehouses in multi billion dollar so called health care system....such rackets...not that I do not know that there is such a lack of care in families.
A spiritual teacher wrote that all the worries, fear, and frustrations of the story in your head you call "My Life" ultimately boils down to the single dash between the year you were born and the year you died on your gravestone.
Just found your lovely channel. I divorced in my mid fifties, dated a bit, had one very short term relationship. However for all intents and purposes I have been single. I haven’t given up on men, but neither do I actively seek companionship. Men my age either have a ton of issues ( as we all do) or want much younger women. So I remain active and open to life. I am financially comfortable. My health is good. I have good relationships with my sons who live near me, and friends. Most important I enjoy my own company!
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. I m old too, but I never allow fear to silently creep into my life. Keep our minds with the things of God. Amen.
We are never alone. We have our guardian angel, with us all the time. We have our Lord who loves us more than we know or realize, and always try to center your thoughts, your trust in In God knowing He is is in control of all about you and put your faith and hope in Him and you will see what He can do for you. Remember this when your time to die comes, it will be easy to know and see God as your soul begins to depart from your body. Your guardian angel will carry you in his arms right to Our Lord. You will be so happy to enter by eternity to see our Lord, and all who have died before us.and this time it will be for eternity, no More sorrows, no more loneliness, but seeing our loved ones again and living our lives in all joy and peace and love , no more loneliness, sickness, sorrow or pain. But eternity with Jesus, in all perfection and joy forever.
Surround youself with people that are younger than yourself, in addition to your same age. The young don't spend a lot of time discussing death and growing old and that helps stay connected in the here and now. But don't be unrealistic about your age.
Why do we have to worry about what people say about us where we’re dead. People change their mind all the time when we are alive., today they might be nice to you but tomorrow they might be bitching about you because you didn’t do what they want you to do... people pleasing is the most stressful thing to do. So live your life to they way you want it as long as you are not hurting anyone intentionally dont worry about when your dead it doesnt matter.
My 93 year old mother just died in a nursing home from Dementia. This is my biggest fear. I do not any Dementia. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone. My husband of 38 years just moved to Nashville without me. I m so overwhelmed and grief stricken. I shouldn’t be 70 and going through this but I am. He took all of our money. God help me. I now have a part time job, will soon lose my health insurance and given up on doing what I wanted to do. I know I am not alone.
I worry about living too long. I am an Elder Law Paralegal and we see clients who out live all their family and friends and just want to go. They are frail and confined and feel lonely all the time. So I pray I don’t out live my health. I eat healthy and exercise and hope for the best. Don’t forget to put your estate planning in order. 😊
I’m not afraid of dying alone or living alone but what frightens me is losing my mobility ie: who will help me out with personal things and shopping for a new computer etc to keep up with the times. I guess if I become more computer savvy I can do everything on line if I’m able mentally I have so many fears about nursing homes God don’t let me end up there. God bless everyone reading this. Hope I didn’t bring you down. These are just my fears .
I'm 43, which probably makes me young around here, but I'm glad people are talkimg about growing older. I live in a youth-obsessed culture, but to be honest, I wouldn't wanna go back to being a young adult. My brain was barely working when I was in my 20's, and I was going through a painful journey of self-realization in my 30's. It's better to be in my 40's. I know who I am now, I love myself now, and I've gained a little wisdom over the past few years. Ideally, I'd like to see more discussions about getting older, taking the stigma out of aging, because it's something that society doesn't prepare people for.
You sound very wise for your age. I still had a lot to learn when I was in my forties. Now, alas I’m 60 and wish I hadn’t taken those halcyon days of my youth, for granted. You are so right when you say that we live in a youth obsessed culture. There is alot to be valued about the wisdom that comes with age. Unfortunately I wasn’t prepared for some of these issues that come with getting older because it just wasn’t talked about ( no internet back then). Such as loneliness, loss of parents and loved ones, etc. Now with so much information at our fingertips, people can be more enlightened on so many different issues.
As a childfree woman I don't really worry about how I will be remembered. I do worry about if I'll still be able to do things for myself, if I'll have enough money and how I will find the strength to carry on if my spouse passes before me.
my spouse of 59 years died this year. Life without him is painful, I have long covid and difficult to move around. You talk about a viking cruise..well there are those of us that don't have that luxury. Dying alone..it is the uncertainty..and who will find me? That is a weird though. How I will be remembered? Yes, I know people you are actually doing their obituary. Living without funds is terrifying.
I will not have my own child because of hysterectomy but I want to live life with a companion/s. Having a scholarship foundation is my life mission. No one deserve to die alone let us create a community that support elderlies. Lets also create home for the elders.
no........... you did not come to the world alone.............your mother anticipated your birth for 9mos............ there were doctors and nurses who waited for your delivery................. people were happy that you lived.............
I think the most important thing is health. I felt ill at 35 years old with a genetic muscle disorder. I was very active but my life changed drastically. You can't do so much if you don't have health and even socializing is very hard.
These are all great ideas how not to be alone. I was lonely in my marriage and now I can appreciate being alone and enjoying my surroundings better. Getting out is good so we can make new friends. Sixty and me is a wonderful networking channel to be a part of.
As a 69 year old retired nurse I’ve “ worried “ about getting older. I’ve seen so many scary scenarios. I’m divorced with adult married daughters and adult grandchildren. Even though we’re far apart we communicate daily. I have prepared for anticipated life events as best as I can. I have Long term care insurance, I participate in physical exercises almost daily to stay healthy, my funeral is paid for, I’ve downsized tremendously, I live as simple as possible in order to save for my “ fun” activities. I only eat out when I have family and friends visiting. I stay busy with a Single’s group, church and community activities. Due to previous professional driving experiences before becoming a nurse I now privately teach teenagers to drive. It’s very rewarding and obligation of a few hours a week. My children and grandchildren agree I’ll live with one of them when the needed time comes. I have PEACE in my FAITH. As a nurse I tell people “ literally everyone dies alone”. I’ve seen Many people “ wait” until all the family has left their space to pass. I’ve seen many “ wait” until someone arrives to let go and pass away. No one knows how it will be for us. We just need to be prepared spiritually. At the request of my children, I have been writing “ my stories “ from my varied life experiences to eventually put into book form for my family. Hugs from Arkansas,USA.
Hi Margaret, Really, a huge well done for setting up your channel. I say as a single lady about to celebrate my 45 and (20 year) bit birthday and no kids, FOCUS ON LIVING, NOT DEATH!!!
This is such a great topic yes I can see her concern I also know reality is a fact I will be dying alone without family to help me the trick is to be at least included in some kind of Community Support where you're not totally isolated being or being able to age in your home with some type of home care or even adopted people such as Elder adopting trusted new family and friends to at least check on them
I absolutely love your videos. I'm nowhere near 60 yet, but I find your content to be quite useful, and your positive message really resonates with me. I often turn to these videos for comfort and insight when I'm feeling overwhelmed about whatever. Thank you for all that you do!
@@reginagrayson2465 That's so true! If people would learn to develop a relationship with God and Jesus, they would Not be so lonely and full of 'poor lonely me' mentality. I'm 67, in great shape and not worried about all these depressing things. I put my trust in God and I know I am going to be all right.
I have decided to have a Death Doula when my time comes and I like the idea of living in a retirement home where I have my own apartment & not worry about traveling when I want my pets & plants looked after when I travel. An older friend of mine lives like this & she loves to take cruises, maintains her independence, has peers her age & knows her place, pets & plants are safe.
I have found my faith community to be another family. I go to mass every morning and the closeness and love I feel from a caring God is ever present. I have my ups and downs, too, but I dated half the planet in my 50's afraid I would wind up alone. Thank God, I have a sibling who calls me every day and even that doesn't guarantee I'll be with someone when I die. But I'm not afraid anymore. I cared for both parents and saw miracles every day as I tried to meet their needs. As the Roger's and Hammerstein song maintains, "...walk on with hope in your heart and you'll never walk alone." I believe that truly. Trust in God who loved you into existence and will ever be true to that love.
I was a worrier, but as I’ve got older I’ve taught myself to calm down and embrace the here and now.. enjoy life more, in a nutshell I’ve mellowed 🙏🏻🌺 Thanks so much for doing these videos so enjoy all the various topics
I think the best situation is like the one the Golden Girls had on TV except it would be better that all have their own small homes in the same block. People don't visit like they used to because everyone is living too far from one another.
@James Oliver...yeah if that was a real situation it would be great. The thing is there is so much jealousy and nastiness out there now it's probably pretty much an impossibility.
This is such a pertinent topic. It’s worrisome but it’s a relief to talk about it. Thanks for tackling this today! I can see from the many comments that it is on all of our minds.
Have just managed to get back in touch with my daughter after Parental Alienation, but it's the little things that she doesn't do, that hurt. I'm never invited down for Sunday Lunch, as I live alone, her father and I are divorced, or get a phone call, where she asks "How are you Mum," preferable to getting a text, just to hear another voice, and know I am not the only person in the world. Even her friends say she lives in her own little bubble. I think my epitaph on my tombstone would be she lived "A solitary life".
My husband always said that a mother could take care of seven children but that seven children could not(would not!) take care of a mother. Sadly, sometimes, more often, this is true.
Ann...remember Jesus loves you.you're not alone.take care of your self,not to give up.its a temporaly situation,your daughter will loves you as you wish..dreams come true.we love you Ann..just trust Jesus.
Hi there Regi. With all due respect, let's leave Jesus out of the conversation shall we? I respect your beliefs, but they are your own. Stop preaching on this site.
Eat sensible. Drink half your weight in ounces of water daily. Take walks or do some mild exercise of your liking. Enjoy some music and the outdoors whether its rain or shine. Spend on what you NEED first. Make time for those you love.
I am male and respect your group female identity. But I still enjoy and identify with your topics. I wanted to compliment you about your willingness to address such deep poignant life topics and you do it with heart and hope. Laird
That was so very courageous to be so real and sincere of how you feel about growing older. What good is it going to do to worry? Live, laugh, love. That is what life is all about. I'm sixty two, I have conjestive heart failure, I will die someday as we all will and I have very little money and I don't have a partner but, I'm a survivor and COURAGEOUS. I'm not lonely. I read the bible. Watch u-tube videos, go walking. All of those things are free. If worst comes to worst. I'll get three roommates and SPLIT all the bills!! Lol!!! Colleen 🌈🌈🌈 Have a wonderful day!!!
I'm 30 & i already worry about this. My partner is 20 years older than me. I'm so sad & scared for the years I'll have to live missing him and all the other people I'll have lost by then. I don't know how I'm going to get over it. It's so stupid to let these things ruin the time we have but sometimes it still creeps in. Thanks for the video.
Please don't waste your life worrying what if. Been there a billion times myself. Thank God, it didn't destroyed me. You need to live not worry unnecessary. God bless you.
For your sake don't waste your life worrying what if? If it helps you to refocus. I'm be 59 next month. My kids don't talk to me. They might never want to. I'm not in their life. I have no idea. It comes to a point it doesn't matter. I don't even need to know why? I'm serious. I also don't care what they think or what others think. It's so liberating. Try it! I live life to the fullest. Do I have problems?? Sure, like everyone. Whatever you do or don't do. ..there are consequences. The choices we made determine our faith. Please don't end up to be one of the statistics "If only club".
I am in the same position. With the same age gap relationship. Someone could argue why I don't find someone closer to my age but it's complicated and long topic. I love my partner. But also I am in a foreign country and children free by choice. I worry what will happen when he won't be around and where will I end up? See it's almost impossible to find someone in older age to love again as most men would have been damaged by then or simply chase younger women. It sucks but hang in there. You aren't alone!
Another wonderful chat! For myself, I truly feel that health is currency as I age. I see health as a hedge against financial problems, loneliness and my ability to generate income as I need to. I have an active job, lots of movement, and I'm grateful for it. I've been hesitant even to pursue promotional opportunities because those jobs are very sedentary and I'm terrified of that impact on my fitness! I don't know if I'm right or not, but I've come to believe that my fitness is the fundamental key to surviving and thriving as I age. A sort of bank account.
Keeping the mind and brain active is important ... a sedentary job requires brainpower. Physical activity can be an additional part of healthy lifestyle.
Thank you so much for making this video about all the things I worry about as I age. I am 65 and even though I used to exercise like crazy I now have mobility issues that really scare me. Also, because of my physical ailments I cannot work anymore and am living on a very limited income so I worry about being able to continue to support myself. You have such a calm and comforting mannerism about you and its wonderful that you inspire us to try to stay calm and practical to troubleshoot how to overcome the possible hardships of aging and how to live our best possible lives and be our best possible selves. This community you have built is wonderful. Who is the author of the book you discuss and what is the name of the book? I appreciate the wonderful resources you come up with that are so helpful.
What a great topic and one that concerns so many of us! There are no guarantees in life and the only thing we can control is our attitude and yours is great! Thank you!
I believe how we are remembered is a true sum of the kind of person we were. I want to be remembered with a smile. I’m 66 and about the age of 60 I was having issues with my balance and odd accidents and falls. So many tests and a biopsy that came back Muscular Dystrophy. I learned I was born with it that progressed slow. So thankful I was active with my kids and the baby stages with my Grands. It has progressed to the point of a walker and cane and trouble with my hands and arms. I’m Blessed with a Wonderful husband of 46 years and our family live very close. We have lived what I call a non wasteful life. Lived a very enjoyable life but never buying what we didn’t need and taking care of what we had. Especially vehicles. My concern and prayer is to not become a burden and use up are investments and to be able to stay in my home. I keep it in my prayers but I refuse to let it steal my peace from the joys of today.
Hello, how are you doing today ?... I hope everything is going on well with you,... I must confess you has really captured my attention and i will love to share in the joy of your smile, in fact i want to get to know you better... i am a honest man and honestly i am not here to play games, I always says the truth even if it hurts. you can email me on my personal email address hwaller4599@gmail.com or text me on 248 502 8943 I will be looking forward to read from you soon. Tim ...
I worry that when I could not anymore take care of myself no one is going to be there to clean me and let me eat until I am so weak and ready to die. If I could choose want to die in my sleep I don't want to die slowly I want fast and that is when I sleep.
Margaret, I just want to thank you for the wide variety of topics you talk about. I experienced the worst side of watching a loved one grow old alone. It was my mother. I am 55, and the same age that my mother was when my father died. It is quite overwhelming to think about being alone at this age. However, instead of choosing life, friendships, and growing as a person, my mother chose to use alcohol. It started with wine before bed escalating from there. She spent her life organizing it around her drinking, as she was a functional Southern socialite. But, her life ended early at 73. She developed an autoimmune disease and her body could not fight it. Please, anyone reading this, if you are sliding down this slippery path, stop and get the help you need!!
Thank you for sharing that. I believe my father is close to end stage alcoholism. He has a loving wife my (stepmother) but she enables him. Nothing is more important to him than his drinking.
A couple years ago, my cousin who was 78 died alone at home! She had a home paid for, plenty of money to live, 2 kids that loved her and called her every single day, plus many friends who cared about her, Yet, when the time came, she died alone that night. I am 71 and not well off like her and my kids (3 sons) are not that attentive. Lately, I have been thinking about her! It's sad to die alone no matter what your circumstances are! I lost my mate 3 years ago to Alz and have been alone since. I keep trying to come to grips with the inevitable and realize no matter who you are or what you have, you might still die alone! Kind of sad to think about!!
I am 62 and going for total hip replacement. I feel it's now a down hill slide. I have isolated myself . Girl friends are gone. Nobody will remember me. I have accepted that. I was always afraid to die alone and now I know it will be that way.
It's not downhill....your hip replacement will result in a better mobile you.......people forget great public philanthropic figures too...why b bothered by no one remembering us .
I worry about being left behind... all the people around me have moved on, moving abroad, most of them, and getting on with their lives and I feel rather stuck, and one reason is, financially
Yes, that happens with all the migration. When I go back to my birthplace I feel I no longer belong there, but I'll always be a foreigner in my adopted country. It happens.
Yes I was born in United States but most relatives are overseas and here its isolation. But I also like my privacy. You feel somewhere in the middle, never really belonging anywhere
First, thank you for discussing these topics, very helpful. This coming week we are going to update our wills and make some decisions about final arrangements. I’m 67 and in pretty good health, my husband is 86 and still working like a 40 year old. Thinking about a living trust instead of a will and exploring the idea of donating body to science or whatever ‘greener’ way to return the physical body back to the Earth. My husband has adult kids, I have no family left, so I feel that it’s very important to get everything in order while we are still healthy. We have been together over 30 years. Your list of worries are right on. I worry about being alone, financial struggles and trying to get in better health. Have already started the downsizing of items, Marie Kondo’s book was very helpful. Organizing is an ongoing process... Thank you again for your timely topics!
I am a lesbian and life has been lonely..... I have had trouble meeting someone of quality and local! My health is great and I still work full time with a very satisfying career.. I have just a couple of loyal friends but I fear losing them because of their failing health issues.
Same here! Well, apart for the fact that my health isn't that great. My parents died years ago, I'm an only child. Also have a couple of wonderful friends. When they are gone, there will be nobody left. Pretty awfull future to look forward too.
I think about things like that because l have quite a few friends who are 15 to 20 years older than me and my dad is 80. I talk to him every day and usually see him on the weekends, but l know when he passes, family wise l will be alone. I have two brothers who are both married.(I’m single). They both have children but l find they are pretty useless to me; so l know l will miss my father when he goes!
I lost my husband in early 2017. I have had to think about all these things. I am healthy and can get around just fine at 72. I am faced with either selling my home or share it with my son and wife. I am retired but am also considering taking a part time job. Yes extra money is always an issue. I am very independent so I still think I can do things I did years ago. I am a realist and do realize I need people to be around. Good topics of discussion.
Nice video thanks !! I'm 66 and widowed w/o kids. If nothing else, this has made me aware of how many others besides myself have the same worries. !! I enjoyed reading many of the comments. My biggest worries is being able to live on s/s alone after I stop working, and/ or how long I can keep working... 💕Best wishes to all - R
I don't know about anyone here but if you have put back a little money your kids/grandkids will try anything in the book to try and take it from you for instance car trouble /consolidate their bills, utilities are behind down payment on a car ..i have a male grandchild that borrowed money to buy a car he had a new job making 50 k yr he paid 1 payment thats been over a year i need my money back anyone have advise..i have 4 other grandkids its made it hard on them because i will never loan money to anyone again ...i'am 71 and live alone they don't visit unless they want something they think you owe them something.....sad situation
I'm in my mid 50s .I'm what was called generation X. Many of my friends have already died. I'm very surprised. I had no idea until it started to happen. I always knew my generation had it much harder then my parents who were WW2 and had it extraordinarily easy. But I had no idea it would result in mainly the men dying in late 40s and early 50s. I would say that is the biggest problem I'm having with getting older so far.
I really enjoyed this video! I’m 40yo and live a very healthy lifestyle but I still worry about becoming ill or disabled in my older years, having to potentially depend on others to look after me.
Some cities have set up senior hotlines. You sign up and someone calls you once a week to chat and see how you are doing. They can find help for you if you need a ride, get medicine and food, etc.
I just turned 57 and it’s the first birthday that has really upset me. My husband is 10 years older than me which never bothered me until now. I’m terrified he’s going to die before me (which is probable) and I’ll get old by myself and be so lonely. I suffer from depression, always have, and it comes and goes. I’d be crushed beneath such a weight if he dies and leaves me alone
Margaret, great topic. I'm afraid of it ALL. I've already lost my husband, living with my son and his fiancee, who are expecting, because he lost his job, so I'm helping them! I fear dying alone, a nursing home, Alzheimer's, no money- you name it. As another reader commented, after fifty it IS downhill, but for the very lucky few. I have no friends left. What can I say? Rosemarie ❤🌹🌻
You are not alone! That is why you are here. We are sisters over sixty supporting one another. Suggest you jump on our Facebook page and start talking to others - there are many women just like you! :-)
Hello I am so sorry if this sounds weirds but you wrote such a nice and wonderful comment on here and I like your comment. I can tell you're a very positive person. If it's okay with you I'd love to be friends
This is the fear in the back of my mind. I'm 27, have autism, never had a relationship, live with 56 year old dad and two younger brothers who are 3 and 6 years younger. My mum died at 49 from cancer but she had lots of friends and family. My brothers will eventually move out and I fear dying alone. Everybody I know who is younger(early 20s) is already married and some have kids. So I think my future is bleak :(
❤❤❤❤ im here with you until we both die ❤❤❤❤ im 24 have a sister shes 30 , and my mom and dad 54 and 51 ... I am the youngest and I fear the same thing, I think the easiest way for me to end the worrying of them dying Is to kill myself once theyre gone
@@chocolateandchips7599 I'm going to be 30 this month and things are still the same. When my dad eventually does die I don't know how I'll cope. I have autism too. We know deep down I'll always be single.
I don't have any children and I worry about if something happens to me what will become of my pets. I do not have any reliable friends who are willing to step in and help.
I’m selling mine to someone to feed to their snake ! I was diagnosed in June with stage 4 Down’s syndrome. When I’m close to death they will be eaten by a snake.
Very good.I'd just like to make a couple of points. If you find you have a need for more social interaction,you can meet new people through a website called meetup.com where you submit the name of your city and area and can find people who share your interests to get together with. For instance, I went out for sushi the other night and met seven interesting women in the meetup. We had a really nice time! As far as concerns about dying alone go, really, none of us have any control over that so I tell myself that if I happen to be alone when I die, I'll be more than able to deal with that and I believe that to be true. As far as being concerned about how we will be remembered, this is another case of having no real control over how others choose to remember us, so I feel the best thing we can do is choose to be a person that we ourselves would want to think kindly of. We can waste perfectly good days with things that we have little control over so let's live in the moment ,as much as we can.
As an 84 year old who spent my life taking care of older people i learned so much from those dear ones through the years. Mainly that we become precious or unkind people each day by how we think and act. Everyday we become more kind and humble or more cynical and self serving. We have a choice. I thank my God that i had 40 years to see who i could be as an older woman. I still have to chose how i will act!! Thank you for this positive program.
I am glad that I found you on my life, I l alone, my dear husband passed in 2020 May, he was not well for 10 yrs - took care of him at home, I miss him, trying to face the reality of living alone, I m yoga teacher, conducting yoga class, o two sons, 3 grandkids, I m living by my self, ..... I have noticed you are tackling all the issues which I am thinking, so I m getting so much knowledge & courage from you video, I in Toronto Canada,
Adopt an animal so many need a home stats are we live longer with a pet it’s been me and my dog pal for years too much fun they always are up for something and love unconditionally…rarely lonely. I am turning 61 in a week have had some financial/health difficulties am grateful to have a couch to sleep on for now. Have done some much needed personal growth this past year, sorted priorities, relationships, grew spiritually and am looking forward to the next chapter since gaining much emotional freedom…I AM ENOUGH DARN IT!
Margaret, thank you for the channel. I am so grateful for your devotion and support. I am close to 70. My mind is very alert and healthy with excellent memory. My weight is the same since I was 27. I do moderate exercise daily, 365 days a year. My fear is to lose my health and mental faculty one day. That is why I focus on my diet, fitness, and well being everyday. I try very hard to prolong my health. That is the best thing I can do for myself. Susan
I’m 40 and divorced. I don’t have kids not because I didn’t want to, I just didn’t seem to have found the right partner. I have been grieving the loss of being able to start a family. I know eventually I will come to terms with how my life is turning out. However, one of my biggest worries is growing old, falling ill, and having no one to advocate for me at the end of my life… Just fear I guess. I’m glad I found your video…makes me realize I am not alone heading into this life of mine…
Hello 57 divorced and living alone. 2 daughters, one lives in Australia with her husband. For some reasons (which I can’t figure out why) she doesn’t seems to be keen in keeping in contact with me as often as I’d wish. The other one studies and lives in London. She keeps in regular contacts with me which I am grateful for. Out of the four items you have mentioned, I’m more concerned about dying alone. However your suggestion of co-living with something seems workable for me as I do have a spare room from rent if so. I’m Glad I found your video. Thanks :)
You have a very interesting and informative channel...thank you for all the time you spend putting it together so others may benefit. My challenge is to find girlfriends or even a girlfriend...for all my life I have devoted myself to my mother, it was just her and I not realizing one day she will be gone... that day is here. I've tried to connect with others but it's difficult at this age 68 because so many have their "own" friends or just stick to their family. Traveling, clubs etc require money and although I have money there is that fear of running out... makes it hard to live in the moment...
Hi Elaine - i know making friends in your 60s is hard. Have you tried www.meetup.com or any community or church groups? Wha about a book club or reading group. How about volunteer opportunities? I do hope things work out for you - take good care!
Hi from another Elaine. There aren’t many of us. Heh, we could start our own club. I grew into the name since it’s not a little kid’s name. Did you have a nickname? Let me know. Here’s my email: writelink@gmail.com
What are my fears of getting older? I'll be 70 this year and I'm living in a development for seniors (in Ireland) with a center attached and they offer meals Monday to Friday and some activities. Never thought I would live in the place like this where I am one of the youngest people here. Most people are in their 80s and some even 90s. Many have physical challenges and some mental challenges. And it is they mental challenges that worries me most.
Lena, same issue with me. Forgetting things and unable to focus. Feeling brain fog. I started eating better. Ate fresh foods only. Veggies and meat and small amounts of fruit. Watched my carbs closely. Cut sweets, all grains including breads. I'm insulin resistant. A1c went from 7.2 to 5.6 in 3 months and I lost 18 lbs to boot. My mental focus has also improved. Take care.
I've taken care of my finances~ have gone vegan, losing weight, having fun cooking from scratch ~ fixing up the house and making it safe ~~~~ so what I think about is doing activities before I can't, that "bucket list" , what is it I want to do? Health care professional, wife, mother.. giving to everyone I have never really thought about me..it's always been about everyone else. My daughter has been very supportive and pushing me to do something for ,myself? But what. So I'm starting with a book club, a tap dancing class, I've been attending an Orchid club and I will be preparing tax returns for United Way and a few on my own for pocket money. It took awhile but the ideas are coming to me. But I'm not very comfortable putting me first.
I'm in a highrise. I always say "have a good night/day when i exit the elevator". When others say good night to me, it really lifts my spirit. How i'l be remembered helps me with how il live right now. Thank you for your videos Margaret.
As a young person, how can I find older people who need people in their life? I don't have much family and expect to have none by the time I'm 50 so I'm already thinking about my life as an older person. I would love to be able to do for an older person what I hope someone would do for me someday. Plus older folks have insight into a world long since passed and I would love to hear their stories.
I worry the most about my health. I used to be very active. Married to a wonderful man, a mother to 3 children and worked as a nurse for over 20 years, Then Multiple Sclerosis hit and of course, my way of life has seen some changes. I did turn 60 this year and m my husband is 68. We are very close to our children and grandchildren, but they live hours away. And it's physically hard to have friends and enjoy time together. So yes, I'm very scared of being alone. I did go to FB looking for your site and someone to talk with but was unable to find this topic there. Please help lol
Thanks a lot for this nice, very sensible discourse. One thing I'd like to add (which applies only to a select few) is that people who make exceptional contributions in any field of human endeavor would like to be remembered foremost for the contribution/s they have made when they are gone. Would also like to quote from the Christian hymn which says "Fading away like the stars of the morning; only remembered by what we have done."
I'm 64 and growing old alone with my two cats, no kids or grandkids and didn't want any but am quite happy and have everything I need. No fears at all & worrying only makes things worse so think positive. I think more about life and not illness and death.
You are my inspiration 🤗
I need you as my friend! God bless you for such a positive outlook
That's an absolutely beautiful sentiment.
Yesss!!!! Gosh, so many think that getting old and being alone is pathetic - no, it is not. Have seen too many couples living together who cannot stand each other, kids who are leeches, grandkids who are disrespectful...friends with similar situation to dump it on ya, because they are afraid to be alone. Worse case scenario, you get ill and no one around to help ya and die alone and maybe it is days before anyone find you - but this is a one-time event, ( we will all die one day, no matter what ya do..panic button or no) but you could live alone for another 15-20 years happy living your alone life...does not mean no visitors, no social gathering ( when the pandemic is over or controlled), just that it is nice to go to a quiet home.
@@jillsinanan6777 My dad died alone in his apartment and they estimated 24 hours. His cat started howling and wouldn't quit until someone did a welfare check. Me I live alone, am introverted but have a few friends and things to do and do get out and I'm quite happy and don't feel sorry for myself in the least.
I worry about not being able to take care of my personal needs. Like the things I do every day.....sit in front of makeup mirror and pluck the chin hairs. I want to always be able to take care of my hair and my body. I also worry about winding up in a nursing home and being a victim of abuse. I've heard horror stories on this subject.
Girl, you took the words right out of my mouth, may god bless you, us :)
It is a real concern 💔
Yes I'm terrified of going to a nursing home. I have worked in them and they are horrible places.
Also I would like to add as of Oct 2020 there's no telling what the future holds for so many people. Not sure what avenue I will take. I hope the best for all of you.
So true!
Im from India. Having an 'adrakwali chai'. Its a ginger laced jaggery tea. Super taste . Super rich antioxidant detox drink!
Thank you for talking about the salient issues of growing older all alone.
I’m 56 and these things cross my mind. Outliving my husband, he has diabetes and asthma, we have no children, no family near me, both parents have passed, estranged from my brother for years, being alone, running out of finances, ending up in a Nursing home and dying alone. It’s scary. I try to not think about it, but I do.
You are not alone. There are lots of articles on our website that deal with loneliness and living alone - If you go to www.sixtyandme.com/start you can learn all about our other channels!
Sixty and Me Thank you. I will check those out.
Its so true that as you get older esp mid sixties, these topics come to mind as a natural progression in life so open conversations on them are welcome. Its of comfort to know we are not alone in some of our thoughts.. two decades ago it never came to mind ... and nice to know that as we enter this age which we have never been before we are right on track with out plans, thoughts or fears and we are not alone in them. Appreciate you dear Margaret for your time and efforts in communicating on all topics relevant with kindness and care....
Have always enough stuff in your house to help yourself! In zurich there is dignitias you pay 5000 euros and they give you a nice smoothy and you sleep for ever!!!!!
@@patriciavandevelde5469 😣
I love my life living alone but I am blessed that I have friends around me that we care for one another, I am a 65 yr. old divorced woman. I am grateful for my life because of what the Lord has done and helped me to take care of my mom who died of ALS 2 yrs ago. I live simple I'm not wealthy but I have what I need. I am blessed.
Hello I am so sorry if this sounds weirds but you wrote such a nice and wonderful comment on here and I like your comment. I can tell you're a very positive person. If it's okay with you I'd love to be friends
I am 55 years but have always looked to women older for inspiration, guidance and wisdom. Your videos resonate Margaret as you exude such positive authentic energy. We all want a friend like you...encouraging, uplifting and so switched on to what matters in life.
My biggest fear is, well, losing my 90 something parents, and my siblings and their spouses. I'm not afraid of being alone, just not having my dear family around me.
I have the same fear growing every day as I see them slowely passing. Its very sad.
Great topic. Ultimately, we all die alone. Making peace with that is the best thing we can do. And, regarding worrying about how you'll be remembered? Well, it won't really matter, will it? And, as the adage goes, it's not my business what others think of me :)
Very well said. Spend too much time worrying what if. Number one to living well is your health. Look after what else left of you. Just because it's 'normal' seeing people going to nursing home or frail blah blah blah etc. It doesn't mean you're one of the club member of a nursing home. Life passes by real fast. God bless everyone. Do what you can.
Shanna - Brilliant comment! It is EXACTLY how I feel and what I always tell females, who worry more about what others think instead of carrying on with their lives and being self-contained. Bravo!
@@simplyrise930 Those places are such warehouses in multi billion dollar so called health care system....such rackets...not that I do not know that there is such a lack of care in families.
A spiritual teacher wrote that all the worries, fear, and frustrations of the story in your head you call "My Life" ultimately boils down to the single dash between the year you were born and the year you died on your gravestone.
@@QuietlyCurious this is beautiful
Just found your lovely channel. I divorced in my mid fifties, dated a bit, had one very short term relationship. However for all intents and purposes I have been single. I haven’t given up on men, but neither do I actively seek companionship. Men my age either have a ton of issues ( as we all do) or want much younger women. So I remain active and open to life. I am financially comfortable. My health is good. I have good relationships with my sons who live near me, and friends. Most important I enjoy my own company!
YES very important to enjoy LIFE no matter what just be HAPPY!!!!
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. I m old too, but I never allow fear to silently creep into my life. Keep our minds with the things of God. Amen.
We are never alone. We have our guardian angel, with us all the time. We have our Lord who loves us more than we know or realize, and always try to center your thoughts, your trust in In God knowing He is is in control of all about you and put your faith and hope in Him and you will see what He can do for you. Remember this when your time to die comes, it will be easy to know and see God as your soul begins to depart from your body. Your guardian angel will carry you in his arms right to Our Lord. You will be so happy to enter by eternity to see our Lord, and all who have died before us.and this time it will be for eternity, no More sorrows, no more loneliness, but seeing our loved ones again and living our lives in all joy and peace and love , no more loneliness, sickness, sorrow or pain. But eternity with Jesus, in all perfection and joy forever.
FEAR??? of the Lord? Seriously??? FEAR???
Surround youself with people that are younger than yourself, in addition to your same age. The young don't spend a lot of time discussing death and growing old and that helps stay connected in the here and now. But don't be unrealistic about your age.
Why do we have to worry about what people say about us where we’re dead. People change their mind all the time when we are alive., today they might be nice to you but tomorrow they might be bitching about you because you didn’t do what they want you to do... people pleasing is the most stressful thing to do. So live your life to they way you want it as long as you are not hurting anyone intentionally dont worry about when your dead it doesnt matter.
My 93 year old mother just died in a nursing home from Dementia. This is my biggest fear. I do not any Dementia. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone. My husband of 38 years just moved to Nashville without me. I m so overwhelmed and grief stricken. I shouldn’t be 70 and going through this but I am. He took all of our money. God help me. I now have a part time job, will soon lose my health insurance and given up on doing what I wanted to do. I know I am not alone.
My heart goes out to you living in a state under the exact same circumstances
Don’t let fear keep you in a bad relationship , that’s just hell on earth .
I worry about living too long. I am an Elder Law Paralegal and we see clients who out live all their family and friends and just want to go. They are frail and confined and feel lonely all the time. So I pray I don’t out live my health. I eat healthy and exercise and hope for the best. Don’t forget to put your estate planning in order. 😊
Smarie great point!
My 95 year old aunt says "I outlived all my friends." She does have new younger than her friends, but misses the old ones.
And don't forget to pray, God is always there for us if we ask and have faith.
@@coettahannah8110 Say that for the unbelievers in the back:)
I’m not afraid of dying alone or living alone but what frightens me is losing my mobility ie: who will help me out with personal things and shopping for a new computer etc to keep up with the times. I guess if I become more computer savvy I can do everything on line if I’m able mentally I have so many fears about nursing homes God don’t let me end up there. God bless everyone reading this. Hope I didn’t bring you down. These are just my fears .
I'm 43, which probably makes me young around here, but I'm glad people are talkimg about growing older. I live in a youth-obsessed culture, but to be honest, I wouldn't wanna go back to being a young adult. My brain was barely working when I was in my 20's, and I was going through a painful journey of self-realization in my 30's. It's better to be in my 40's. I know who I am now, I love myself now, and I've gained a little wisdom over the past few years. Ideally, I'd like to see more discussions about getting older, taking the stigma out of aging, because it's something that society doesn't prepare people for.
You sound very wise for your age. I still had a lot to learn when I was in my forties. Now, alas I’m 60 and wish I hadn’t taken those halcyon days of my youth, for granted. You are so right when you say that we live in a youth obsessed culture. There is alot to be valued about the wisdom that comes with age. Unfortunately I wasn’t prepared for some of these issues that come with getting older because it just wasn’t talked about ( no internet back then). Such as loneliness, loss of parents and loved ones, etc. Now with so much information at our fingertips, people can be more enlightened on so many different issues.
As a childfree woman I don't really worry about how I will be remembered. I do worry about if I'll still be able to do things for myself, if I'll have enough money and how I will find the strength to carry on if my spouse passes before me.
my spouse of 59 years died this year. Life without him is painful, I have long covid and difficult to move around. You talk about a viking cruise..well there are those of us that don't have that luxury. Dying alone..it is the uncertainty..and who will find me? That is a weird though. How I will be remembered? Yes, I know people you are actually doing their obituary. Living without funds is terrifying.
I will not have my own child because of hysterectomy but I want to live life with a companion/s. Having a scholarship foundation is my life mission. No one deserve to die alone let us create a community that support elderlies. Lets also create home for the elders.
We all come into the world alone, and we go out alone.
no........... you did not come to the world alone.............your mother anticipated your birth for 9mos............ there were doctors and nurses who waited for your delivery................. people were happy that you lived.............
Agree.
I think the most important thing is health. I felt ill at 35 years old with a genetic muscle disorder. I was very active but my life changed drastically. You can't do so much if you don't have health and even socializing is very hard.
I agree by the time you get ready and get there your to tired to enjoy yourself.
It would be HEAVEN to me to be alone! I’m tired of taking care of someone else . . .
These are all great ideas how not to be alone. I was lonely in my marriage and now I can appreciate being alone and enjoying my surroundings better. Getting out is good so we can make new friends. Sixty and me is a wonderful networking channel to be a part of.
“ Are you a worrier or a warrior ? I like that. Thanks. 😘
As a 69 year old retired nurse I’ve “ worried “ about getting older. I’ve seen so many scary scenarios.
I’m divorced with adult married daughters and adult grandchildren. Even though we’re far apart we communicate daily.
I have prepared for anticipated life events as best as I can.
I have Long term care insurance, I participate in physical exercises almost daily to stay healthy, my funeral is paid for, I’ve downsized tremendously, I live as simple as possible in order to save for my “ fun” activities. I only eat out when I have family and friends visiting. I stay busy with a Single’s group, church and community activities.
Due to previous professional driving experiences before becoming a nurse I now privately teach teenagers to drive. It’s very rewarding and obligation of a few hours a week.
My children and grandchildren agree I’ll live with one of them when the needed time comes. I have PEACE in my FAITH.
As a nurse I tell people “ literally everyone dies alone”.
I’ve seen Many people “ wait” until all the family has left their space to pass.
I’ve seen many “ wait” until someone arrives to let go and pass away.
No one knows how it will be for us. We just need to be prepared spiritually.
At the request of my children, I have been writing “ my stories “ from my varied life experiences to eventually put into book form for my family.
Hugs from Arkansas,USA.
Hi Margaret, Really, a huge well done for setting up your channel. I say as a single lady about to celebrate my 45 and (20 year) bit birthday and no kids, FOCUS ON LIVING, NOT DEATH!!!
Thanks very much Audrey!
That's how I feel about it, Audrey.
This is such a great topic yes I can see her concern I also know reality is a fact I will be dying alone without family to help me the trick is to be at least included in some kind of Community Support where you're not totally isolated being or being able to age in your home with some type of home care or even adopted people such as Elder adopting trusted new family and friends to at least check on them
I absolutely love your videos. I'm nowhere near 60 yet, but I find your content to be quite useful, and your positive message really resonates with me. I often turn to these videos for comfort and insight when I'm feeling overwhelmed about whatever. Thank you for all that you do!
Thanks TC - great to hear and you are very welcome!!
Let's do not leave the spiritual aspect of our life! It is there.. Thanks for your beautiful videos.
Thank you Loto! Have a lovely weekend.
I agree! The religious aspect of our lives is so important!! We should not forget our faith in God.
@@reginagrayson2465 That's so true! If people would learn to develop a relationship with God and Jesus, they would Not be so lonely and full of 'poor lonely me' mentality. I'm 67, in great shape and not worried about all these depressing things. I put my trust in God and I know I am going to be all right.
I have decided to have a Death Doula when my time comes and I like the idea of living in a retirement home where I have my own apartment & not worry about traveling when I want my pets & plants looked after when I travel. An older friend of mine lives like this & she loves to take cruises, maintains her independence, has peers her age & knows her place, pets & plants are safe.
I have found my faith community to be another family. I go to mass every morning and the closeness and love I feel from a caring God is ever present. I have my ups and downs, too, but I dated half the planet in my 50's afraid I would wind up alone. Thank God, I have a sibling who calls me every day and even that doesn't guarantee I'll be with someone when I die. But I'm not afraid anymore. I cared for both parents and saw miracles every day as I tried to meet their needs. As the Roger's and Hammerstein song maintains, "...walk on with hope in your heart and you'll never walk alone." I believe that truly. Trust in God who loved you into existence and will ever be true to that love.
I was a worrier, but as I’ve got older I’ve taught myself to calm down and embrace the here and now.. enjoy life more, in a nutshell I’ve mellowed 🙏🏻🌺
Thanks so much for doing these videos so enjoy all the various topics
I think the best situation is like the one the Golden Girls had on TV except it would be better that all have their own small homes in the same block. People don't visit like they used to because everyone is living too far from one another.
@James Oliver...yeah if that was a real situation it would be great. The thing is there is so much jealousy and nastiness out there now it's probably pretty much an impossibility.
This is such a pertinent topic. It’s worrisome but it’s a relief to talk about it. Thanks for tackling this today! I can see from the many comments that it is on all of our minds.
Have just managed to get back in touch with my daughter after Parental Alienation, but it's the little things that she doesn't do, that hurt. I'm never invited down for Sunday Lunch, as I live alone, her father and I are divorced, or get a phone call, where she asks "How are you Mum," preferable to getting a text, just to hear another voice, and know I am not the only person in the world. Even her friends say she lives in her own little bubble. I think my epitaph on my tombstone would be she lived "A solitary life".
So sorry to hear that, hi from Argentina
My husband always said that a mother could take care of seven children but that seven children could not(would not!) take care of a mother. Sadly, sometimes, more often, this is true.
Ann...remember Jesus loves you.you're not alone.take care of your self,not to give up.its a temporaly situation,your daughter will loves you as you wish..dreams come true.we love you Ann..just trust Jesus.
Hi there Regi. With all due respect, let's leave Jesus out of the conversation shall we? I respect your beliefs, but they are your own. Stop preaching on this site.
@@shelleymackay9736 ...Im so sorry to hear that, I suppose that statement allowed to....please accept my apology...have a good day...
Eat sensible. Drink half your weight in ounces of water daily. Take walks or do some mild exercise of your liking. Enjoy some music and the outdoors whether its rain or shine. Spend on what you NEED first. Make time for those you love.
Drink when you are thirsty trust your body on this. Over hydration is dangerous.
I am male and respect your group female identity. But I still enjoy and identify with your topics. I wanted to compliment you about your willingness to address such deep poignant life topics and you do it with heart and hope. Laird
I dream of having an amazing and fun social network when I'm old. I think that's so important.
I'm 28 and i'm already thinking about this...
Im 24 and this concerns me a lot. I think I Will commit suicide if my sister AND mom both die and I end up alone, for sure
Same...
@@kubasniak you too?
So young long way to go enjoy life
I’m 26 and thinking about this.
That was so very courageous to be so real and sincere of how you feel about growing older. What good is it going to do to worry? Live, laugh, love. That is what life is all about. I'm sixty two, I have conjestive heart failure, I will die someday as we all will and I have very little money and I don't have a partner but, I'm a survivor and COURAGEOUS. I'm not lonely. I read the bible. Watch u-tube videos, go walking. All of those things are free. If worst comes to worst. I'll get three roommates and SPLIT all the bills!! Lol!!! Colleen 🌈🌈🌈 Have a wonderful day!!!
I'm 30 & i already worry about this. My partner is 20 years older than me. I'm so sad & scared for the years I'll have to live missing him and all the other people I'll have lost by then. I don't know how I'm going to get over it. It's so stupid to let these things ruin the time we have but sometimes it still creeps in. Thanks for the video.
Please don't waste your life worrying what if. Been there a billion times myself. Thank God, it didn't destroyed me. You need to live not worry unnecessary. God bless you.
For your sake don't waste your life worrying what if?
If it helps you to refocus. I'm be 59 next month. My kids don't talk to me. They might never want to. I'm not in their life. I have no idea. It comes to a point it doesn't matter. I don't even need to know why? I'm serious. I also don't care what they think or what others think. It's so liberating. Try it! I live life to the fullest. Do I have problems?? Sure, like everyone. Whatever you do or don't do. ..there are consequences. The choices we made determine our faith. Please don't end up to be one of the statistics "If only club".
I am in the same position. With the same age gap relationship. Someone could argue why I don't find someone closer to my age but it's complicated and long topic. I love my partner. But also I am in a foreign country and children free by choice. I worry what will happen when he won't be around and where will I end up? See it's almost impossible to find someone in older age to love again as most men would have been damaged by then or simply chase younger women. It sucks but hang in there. You aren't alone!
Another wonderful chat! For myself, I truly feel that health is currency as I age. I see health as a hedge against financial problems, loneliness and my ability to generate income as I need to. I have an active job, lots of movement, and I'm grateful for it. I've been hesitant even to pursue promotional opportunities because those jobs are very sedentary and I'm terrified of that impact on my fitness! I don't know if I'm right or not, but I've come to believe that my fitness is the fundamental key to surviving and thriving as I age. A sort of bank account.
Keeping the mind and brain active is important ... a sedentary job requires brainpower. Physical activity can be an additional part of healthy lifestyle.
Thank you so much for making this video about all the things I worry about as I age. I am 65 and even though I used to exercise like crazy I now have mobility issues that really scare me. Also, because of my physical ailments I cannot work anymore and am living on a very limited income so I worry about being able to continue to support myself. You have such a calm and comforting mannerism about you and its wonderful that you inspire us to try to stay calm and practical to troubleshoot how to overcome the possible hardships of aging and how to live our best possible lives and be our best possible selves. This community you have built is wonderful. Who is the author of the book you discuss and what is the name of the book? I appreciate the wonderful resources you come up with that are so helpful.
What a great topic and one that concerns so many of us! There are no guarantees in life and the only thing we can control is our attitude and yours is great! Thank you!
We all do our best - thank you so much for being here!
@@sixtyandme l
I believe how we are remembered is a true sum of the kind of person we were. I want to be remembered with a smile. I’m 66 and about the age of 60 I was having issues with my balance and odd accidents and falls. So many tests and a biopsy that came back Muscular Dystrophy. I learned I was born with it that progressed slow. So thankful I was active with my kids and the baby stages with my Grands. It has progressed to the point of a walker and cane and trouble with my hands and arms. I’m Blessed with a Wonderful husband of 46 years and our family live very close. We have lived what I call a non wasteful life. Lived a very enjoyable life but never buying what we didn’t need and taking care of what we had. Especially vehicles. My concern and prayer is to not become a burden and use up are investments and to be able to stay in my home. I keep it in my prayers but I refuse to let it steal my peace from the joys of today.
Hello, how are you doing today ?... I hope everything is going on well with you,... I must confess you has really captured my attention and i will love to share in the joy of your smile, in fact i want to get to know you better... i am a honest man and honestly i am not here to play games, I always says the truth even if it hurts. you can email me on my personal email address hwaller4599@gmail.com or text me on 248 502 8943 I will be looking forward to read from you soon.
Tim ...
Dude. This isn't a hookup site.
@@michealwilliam8315 then begin by confessing you are a scammer!!
I am glad I have found this video, I have always been afraid of being alone as I get older and I am often sad.
Nelda Johnson Same here,but it’s not over yet,we have time still
I worry that when I could not anymore take care of myself no one is going to be there to clean me and let me eat until I am so weak and ready to die. If I could choose want to die in my sleep I don't want to die slowly I want fast and that is when I sleep.
Margaret, I just want to thank you for the wide variety of topics you talk about. I experienced the worst side of watching a loved one grow old alone. It was my mother. I am 55, and the same age that my mother was when my father died. It is quite overwhelming to think about being alone at this age. However, instead of choosing life, friendships, and growing as a person, my mother chose to use alcohol. It started with wine before bed escalating from there. She spent her life organizing it around her drinking, as she was a functional Southern socialite. But, her life ended early at 73. She developed an autoimmune disease and her body could not fight it. Please, anyone reading this, if you are sliding down this slippery path, stop and get the help you need!!
Thanks so much Patricia for sharing your story- take good care of yourself!
Thank u Patricia the same thing happen to my grandma.
Thank you for sharing that. I believe my father is close to end stage alcoholism. He has a loving wife my (stepmother) but she enables him. Nothing is more important to him than his drinking.
A couple years ago, my cousin who was 78 died alone at home! She had a home paid for, plenty of money to live, 2 kids that loved her and called her every single day, plus many friends who cared about her, Yet, when the time came, she died alone that night. I am 71 and not well off like her and my kids (3 sons) are not that attentive. Lately, I have been thinking about her! It's sad to die alone no matter what your circumstances are! I lost my mate 3 years ago to Alz and have been alone since. I keep trying to come to grips with the inevitable and realize no matter who you are or what you have, you might still die alone! Kind of sad to think about!!
I am 62 and going for total hip replacement. I feel it's now a down hill slide. I have isolated myself . Girl friends are gone. Nobody will remember me. I have accepted that. I was always afraid to die alone and now I know it will be that way.
soldier mom No don’t accept that fate,your still alive now,you have time to find someone.Its not late or over,switch the hell out of that mindset
It's not downhill....your hip replacement will result in a better mobile you.......people forget great public philanthropic figures too...why b bothered by no one remembering us .
I worry about being left behind... all the people around me have moved on, moving abroad, most of them, and getting on with their lives and I feel rather stuck, and one reason is, financially
Hi Viktoria, I have noticed that people who move abroad sometimes move back home!
M Parton I have lived here so long now, that "home" is not home anymore. This is kinda home, though I will always be a foreigner
Yes, that happens with all the migration. When I go back to my birthplace I feel I no longer belong there, but I'll always be a foreigner in my adopted country. It happens.
Yes I was born in United States but most relatives are overseas and here its isolation. But I also like my privacy. You feel somewhere in the middle, never really belonging anywhere
@@user-pw2dq4lf2p I can totally relate. Polish living in Canada.
I'm in my 30s and I love listening to the older folks so I can be prepared. Thanks :)
First, thank you for discussing these topics, very helpful. This coming week we are going to update our wills and make some decisions about final arrangements. I’m 67 and in pretty good health, my husband is 86 and still working like a 40 year old. Thinking about a living trust instead of a will and exploring the idea of donating body to science or whatever ‘greener’ way to return the physical body back to the Earth. My husband has adult kids, I have no family left, so I feel that it’s very important to get everything in order while we are still healthy. We have been together over 30 years. Your list of worries are right on. I worry about being alone, financial struggles and trying to get in better health. Have already started the downsizing of items, Marie Kondo’s book was very helpful. Organizing is an ongoing process...
Thank you again for your timely topics!
I am a lesbian and life has been lonely..... I have had trouble meeting someone of quality and local! My health is great and I still work full time with a very satisfying career.. I have just a couple of loyal friends but I fear losing them because of their failing health issues.
Same here! Well, apart for the fact that my health isn't that great. My parents died years ago, I'm an only child. Also have a couple of wonderful friends. When they are gone, there will be nobody left. Pretty awfull future to look forward too.
I think about things like that because l have quite a few friends who are 15 to 20 years older than me and my dad is 80. I talk to him every day and usually see him on the weekends, but l know when he passes, family wise l will be alone. I have two brothers who are both married.(I’m single). They both have children but l find they are pretty useless to me; so l know l will miss my father when he goes!
I am 34 and I find this video very educational. Thank you for sharing.
I lost my husband in early 2017. I have had to think about all these things. I am healthy and can get around just fine at 72. I am faced with either selling my home or share it with my son and wife. I am retired but am also considering taking a part time job. Yes extra money is always an issue. I am very independent so I still think I can do things I did years ago. I am a realist and do realize I need people to be around. Good topics of discussion.
Why not retire in a cheaper country? Belize for example
Nice video thanks !! I'm 66 and widowed w/o kids. If nothing else, this has made me aware of how many others besides myself have the same worries. !! I enjoyed reading many of the comments. My biggest worries is being able to live on s/s alone after I stop working, and/ or how long I can keep working... 💕Best wishes to all - R
do hope all is great with you and BEST WISHES TO YOU AS WELL!!!!
your right margaret we have take care of our self physically,and emotionally.
I don't know about anyone here but if you have put back a little money your kids/grandkids will try anything in the book to try and take it from you for instance car trouble /consolidate their bills, utilities are behind down payment on a car ..i have a male grandchild that borrowed money to buy a car he had a new job making 50 k yr he paid 1 payment thats been over a year i need my money back anyone have advise..i have 4 other grandkids its made it hard on them because i will never loan money to anyone again ...i'am 71 and live alone they don't visit unless they want something they think you owe them something.....sad situation
Rosie you just have to say no because you need the money for yourself. I know you want to help, but sometimes saying no is the help they need.
I worry most about not having things complete. And how the people who love me will handle it.
I'm in my mid 50s .I'm what was called generation X. Many of my friends have already died. I'm very surprised. I had no idea until it started to happen. I always knew my generation had it much harder then my parents who were WW2 and had it extraordinarily easy. But I had no idea it would result in mainly the men dying in late 40s and early 50s. I would say that is the biggest problem I'm having with getting older so far.
I really enjoyed this video! I’m 40yo and live a very healthy lifestyle but I still worry about becoming ill or disabled in my older years, having to potentially depend on others to look after me.
Some cities have set up senior hotlines. You sign up and someone calls you once a week to chat and see how you are doing. They can find help for you if you need a ride, get medicine and food, etc.
Hi Vicki - yes i know there are some great ones - i wonder if there is a directly of some kind :-)
That’s wonderful. I might look into that!
I just turned 57 and it’s the first birthday that has really upset me. My husband is 10 years older than me which never bothered me until now. I’m terrified he’s going to die before me (which is probable) and I’ll get old by myself and be so lonely. I suffer from depression, always have, and it comes and goes. I’d be crushed beneath such a weight if he dies and leaves me alone
will keep you in my PRAYERS!!!!
Margaret, great topic. I'm afraid of it ALL. I've already lost my husband, living with my son and his fiancee, who are expecting, because he lost his job, so I'm helping them! I fear dying alone, a nursing home, Alzheimer's, no money- you name it. As another reader commented, after fifty it IS downhill, but for the very lucky few. I have no friends left. What can I say? Rosemarie ❤🌹🌻
You are not alone! That is why you are here. We are sisters over sixty supporting one another. Suggest you jump on our Facebook page and start talking to others - there are many women just like you! :-)
Take good care,my friend.
Remember, you always have us!
I live for 25 yrs in the USA…but I own a home in the Philippines and I have no problem going back there to die.
Hello I am so sorry if this sounds weirds but you wrote such a nice and wonderful comment on here and I like your comment. I can tell you're a very positive person. If it's okay with you I'd love to be friends
You are such a fabulous inspirational woman! Thank you for raising all these important issues.💖
Thanks for your positivity and not shying away from important issues like this.
Very serious video, very necessary video, thank you 🌹
I'm too young to have this fear but I do because I feel like I will be alone forever and i wont have anyone to grow old and it sucks
over thinking leads me here
Same im just 16 but im scared
I’m going to Taco Bell for some nachos !
This is the fear in the back of my mind. I'm 27, have autism, never had a relationship, live with 56 year old dad and two younger brothers who are 3 and 6 years younger. My mum died at 49 from cancer but she had lots of friends and family. My brothers will eventually move out and I fear dying alone. Everybody I know who is younger(early 20s) is already married and some have kids. So I think my future is bleak :(
At least you have siblings. It's just me and my parents here.
❤❤❤❤
❤❤❤❤ im here with you until we both die ❤❤❤❤ im 24 have a sister shes 30 , and my mom and dad 54 and 51 ... I am the youngest and I fear the same thing, I think the easiest way for me to end the worrying of them dying Is to kill myself once theyre gone
@@chocolateandchips7599 I'm going to be 30 this month and things are still the same. When my dad eventually does die I don't know how I'll cope. I have autism too. We know deep down I'll always be single.
@@Kinky_Oreo I feel scared of being by myself too ... I wont have a couple either AND I wan to remain childless , Im 24 but I feel 5
Being alone. Winding up in a nursing home. How horrible.
I don't have any children and I worry about if something happens to me what will become of my pets. I do not have any reliable friends who are willing to step in and help.
Just sell your pets to a stranger at the bus station. Use the money to buy liquor !
Leaetta Hyer. That’s really insensitive when that is a genuine worry for people who are older who have pets!
I’m selling mine to someone to feed to their snake ! I was diagnosed in June with stage 4 Down’s syndrome. When I’m close to death they will be eaten by a snake.
Leaetta Hyer. Wow, you’re really showing the world what an unfeeling person you are!
Very good.I'd just like to make a couple of points. If you find you have a need for more social interaction,you can meet new people through a website called meetup.com where you submit the name of your city and area and can find people who share your interests to get together with. For instance, I went out for sushi the other night and met seven interesting women in the meetup. We had a really nice time! As far as concerns about dying alone go, really, none of us have any control over that so I tell myself that if I happen to be alone when I die, I'll be more than able to deal with that and I believe that to be true. As far as being concerned about how we will be remembered, this is another case of having no real control over how others choose to remember us, so I feel the best thing we can do is choose to be a person that we ourselves would want to think kindly of. We can waste perfectly good days with things that we have little control over so let's live in the moment ,as much as we can.
I too am with meetup, but due to Covid (2020) virus pandemic there is very little on socially at the moment.
Good morning fm Singapore 13/11.❤️ enjoy listening to you in the morning especially while having breakfast. Motivating.
I worry about not knowing what is going to happen to me when i get really old
As an 84 year old who spent my life taking care of older people i learned so much from those dear ones through the years. Mainly that we become precious or unkind people each day by how we think and act. Everyday we become more kind and humble or more cynical and self serving. We have a choice. I thank my God that i had 40 years to see who i could be as an older woman. I still have to chose how i will act!!
Thank you for this positive program.
I'm turning 60 this year, I'm glad to find your channel -- your advice is very good!!! Greetings from Canada!
wher about in Canada,i ve been to Gatenaeu
I am glad that I found you on my life, I l alone, my dear husband passed in 2020 May, he was not well for 10 yrs - took care of him at home, I miss him, trying to face the reality of living alone, I m yoga teacher, conducting yoga class, o two sons, 3 grandkids, I m living by my self, ..... I have noticed you are tackling all the issues which I am thinking, so I m getting so much knowledge & courage from you video, I in Toronto Canada,
This one brought me to tears. I only say Thank You.
Adopt an animal so many need a home stats are we live longer with a pet it’s been me and my dog pal for years too much fun they always are up for something and love unconditionally…rarely lonely. I am turning 61 in a week have had some financial/health difficulties am grateful to have a couch to sleep on for now. Have done some much needed personal growth this past year, sorted priorities, relationships, grew spiritually and am looking forward to the next chapter since gaining much emotional freedom…I AM ENOUGH DARN IT!
Margaret, thank you for the channel. I am so grateful for your devotion and support. I am close to 70. My mind is very alert and healthy with excellent memory. My weight is the same since I was 27. I do moderate exercise daily, 365 days a year. My fear is to lose my health and mental faculty one day. That is why I focus on my diet, fitness, and well being everyday. I try very hard to prolong my health. That is the best thing I can do for myself. Susan
Thanks Susan - try not to worry - you are doing great!!!!
I’m 40 and divorced. I don’t have kids not because I didn’t want to, I just didn’t seem to have found the right partner. I have been grieving the loss of being able to start a family. I know eventually I will come to terms with how my life is turning out. However, one of my biggest worries is growing old, falling ill, and having no one to advocate for me at the end of my life… Just fear I guess. I’m glad I found your video…makes me realize I am not alone heading into this life of mine…
I worry I’m alone all the time & my daughter & husband who lives only ten minutes away want nothing to do with me.
You are amazing
Such a fantastic topics you choose
Thank you veryyy much
You are a great mentor
God bless you.
Thank you Homa! have a wonderful day. x
Hello
57 divorced and living alone. 2 daughters, one lives in Australia with her husband. For some reasons (which I can’t figure out why) she doesn’t seems to be keen in keeping in contact with me as often as I’d wish. The other one studies and lives in London. She keeps in regular contacts with me which I am grateful for.
Out of the four items you have mentioned, I’m more concerned about dying alone.
However your suggestion of co-living with something seems workable for me as I do have a spare room from rent if so. I’m Glad I found your video. Thanks :)
Helen C Did you find anyone to live with yet? That sounds great to have someone there
You have a very interesting and informative channel...thank you for all the time you spend putting it together so others may benefit. My challenge is to find girlfriends or even a girlfriend...for all my life I have devoted myself to my mother, it was just her and I not realizing one day she will be gone... that day is here.
I've tried to connect with others but it's difficult at this age 68 because so many have their "own" friends or just stick to their family. Traveling, clubs etc require money and although I have money there is that fear of running out... makes it hard to live in the moment...
Hi Elaine - i know making friends in your 60s is hard. Have you tried www.meetup.com or any community or church groups? Wha about a book club or reading group. How about volunteer opportunities? I do hope things work out for you - take good care!
Sixty and Me Thank you for getting back to me... it means a lot🌺
Hi from another Elaine. There aren’t many of us. Heh, we could start our own club. I grew into the name since it’s not a little kid’s name. Did you have a nickname? Let me know. Here’s my email: writelink@gmail.com
Thank you for that informative and positive video👌💪. You are inspiring me! I am 37, childless and really worried about my future. I want to prepare.
It ain't beautiful... the reality is for the vast majority of the population it's cruel, painful, unfair existence. But thank you for this video.
What are my fears of getting older? I'll be 70 this year and I'm living in a development for seniors (in Ireland) with a center attached and they offer meals Monday to Friday and some activities. Never thought I would live in the place like this where I am one of the youngest people here. Most people are in their 80s and some even 90s. Many have physical challenges and some mental challenges. And it is they mental challenges that worries me most.
Carol Vialogos I
Carol Vialogos sorry for being insensitive but is that you in your picture Carol? you look gorgeous! you look 50 not 70
Lena, same issue with me. Forgetting things and unable to focus. Feeling brain fog. I started eating better. Ate fresh foods only. Veggies and meat and small amounts of fruit. Watched my carbs closely. Cut sweets, all grains including breads. I'm insulin resistant. A1c went from 7.2 to 5.6 in 3 months and I lost 18 lbs to boot. My mental focus has also improved. Take care.
I've taken care of my finances~ have gone vegan, losing weight, having fun cooking from scratch ~ fixing up the house and making it safe ~~~~ so what I think about is doing activities before I can't, that "bucket list" , what is it I want to do? Health care professional, wife, mother.. giving to everyone I have never really thought about me..it's always been about everyone else. My daughter has been very supportive and pushing me to do something for ,myself? But what. So I'm starting with a book club, a tap dancing class, I've been attending an Orchid club and I will be preparing tax returns for United Way and a few on my own for pocket money. It took awhile but the ideas are coming to me. But I'm not very comfortable putting me first.
Being alone is the most wonderful thing.
I die inside when I’m alone
I'm in a highrise. I always say "have a good night/day when i exit the elevator". When others say good night to me, it really lifts my spirit. How i'l be remembered helps me with how il live right now. Thank you for your videos Margaret.
Thanks for sharing!
As a young person, how can I find older people who need people in their life? I don't have much family and expect to have none by the time I'm 50 so I'm already thinking about my life as an older person. I would love to be able to do for an older person what I hope someone would do for me someday. Plus older folks have insight into a world long since passed and I would love to hear their stories.
Halleth, you could go visit at an assisted living as soon as they open up. There are a lot of people there who would love company.
Great stuff thanx for sharing
I worry the most about my health. I used to be very active. Married to a wonderful man, a mother to 3 children and worked as a nurse for over 20 years, Then Multiple Sclerosis hit and of course, my way of life has seen some changes. I did turn 60 this year and m my husband is 68. We are very close to our children and grandchildren, but they live hours away. And it's physically hard to have friends and enjoy time together. So yes, I'm very scared of being alone. I did go to FB looking for your site and someone to talk with but was unable to find this topic there. Please help lol
Teryn Swager You're very fortunate to have a husband. Some of us don't have anyone
How are you?I have a chronic condition as well and loniless is a part of it because I am too ill to socialize
yes my biggest fear.
If you're afraid and you're fighting you've already lost.
Hey Margaret ,love this topic i think most of us do worry about these things it gives us things to surely talk an thing about .
You look lovely today Margaret. Is it new makeup or is it happiness from within that makes you look so relaxed and younger.
Thanks a lot for this nice, very sensible discourse. One thing I'd like to add (which applies only to a select few) is that people who make exceptional contributions in any field of human endeavor would like to be remembered foremost for the contribution/s they have made when they are gone. Would also like to quote from the Christian hymn which says "Fading away like the stars of the morning; only remembered by what we have done."
I worry about my mobility in the future and how I will manage.
Me, too.
I don't care about how I will be remembered, thank goodness. The other things, tho', I do think about!
This was a great video. I got a lot of information and made me think about my own life..Thanks for sharing....Have a great day..
The
On a lighter note, your hair looks great today! Youthful.