How To Never Run Out Of Things To Say: Tyler's 3 Secrets To Keep A Conversation Going
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- Опубліковано 15 вер 2024
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Working hard lately! TONS of new videos coming. I'm also working on a new platform to host our CLASSIC content! It's expensive and amazing, so tons of time going into that. I also included my lovely ex girlfriend CJ Sparxx in today's vid -- follow her at instagram.com/cjsparxx -- we are still great friends years later, and she is a huge supporter of this community. I always felt bad I never promoted her Instagram when we were together. So tried to make up for it here by including some footage from a previous trip that we took (and then mixed it with footage from this year's trip). Be sure to follow her, she's one of the funniest people I've ever met, and say hi to her for me. Have fun! -Tyler
*Thank you so much Owen!*
Tyler think you’re getting better and better at the new style of vid.
Loved this one, lots of useful, applicable advice, and an inspirational ending - “claim it”
Love & respect from northern England 👊💕💯
Thanks fam. Eagerly waiting for the Classic content platform thingy :)
Thanks everyone. The heartfelt outreach about the classics means a lot to me. I put my entire 30's into it, so trust me, no one feels it more than myself. We are putting something special together, will just take some time. But it's coming -Tyler
Thanks so much Tyler, I'm truly forever grateful for the value you and your team are continually spreading. Again, it means so much, cant wait to see what the future holds, I know its gonna be bright!
1. Everything I say has value purely bc it comes from me
2. Your perspective has value
3. Stop needing to be perfect
4. Make something boring interesting - cadence
5. “Release muscles”
6. Don’t rely on external validation - sense of internal worth is everything
I'm impressed the cameraman was able to walk backwards for so long without falling over...
He fell a bit but we covered it with B Reel. Largely amazing walk he did tho! -Tyler
Plot twist : the camera man was actually walking forward, Owen was just talking backwards the whole video
always the same. camera men of tyler are op
@@AlexLoskutov666 Why does this seem more likely?
@@AlexLoskutov666 stfu haha
I'm a copywriter and used taking notes on this vid as my morning write. Thought I'd copy & Paste for you guys. Also summarized in my own words at the end.
Why did I do this? Because I am hungover and drinking coffee while watching this on a Sunday morning, lol. Went out last night, got hammered (i know, i know), puked on shirt, still pulled with puke on shirt, and now drinking coffee. Great weekend.
Anyways... Here's notes.
Tyler Tips:
Beliefs you need to cultivate:
1) Everything you say has value because it came from YOU. You are worthy of holding someone's attention with you speech (and making them wait while you pause). Here's the crazy part: they will actually be GRATEFUL to be in the presence of someone who is comfortable enough to take time when they speak. AKA HIGH VALUE.
2) Everything you say has value because it's YOUR life’s perspective. Each person (even you) has a unique "energy signature" that is them in their entirety. We each have our own stories, own experiences, own focuses, etc. And these things merge together to form the person that is you. Nobody else has that same, literal-one-in-7-billion combination as you. Be courageous enough to share yourself with the world. Someone has to do it. Why not you?
3) Doesn’t matter what you say - it’s how you say it. Hold someone's attention while talking about ripping a leaf. Get them to stop what they're doing and light up like a christmas tree on the most boring of subjects. With good tonality, conviction, facial expressions, and high-level energy, people will want to hear you speak about anything. Tyler is a living example of this.
4) Let it go and see what arises like a magic 8 ball. Take a moment and think of 10 random words. Say them out loud. For me: monkey, jellybeans, silver, coins, coffee, mariokart. Where did these words come from? Who cares. Call it a higher power. Open yourself up to letting your higher power speak the words for you. Just BELIEVE those words are perfect, and they will be. It's not so much there's a "perfect thing to say"... but we need to consciously stamp every word that comes out of our mouths with the "THIS IS THE PERFECT THING TO SAY" belief. and it will become that.
5) Release muscle - sort of like 8 ball. Meditating helps a lot with this. When you are stifled, you are worrying about so many things, consciously and subconsciously. How you look, repercussions of social failure, how safe environment is, etc. Let it go. Release. Chill. You're good. Realize you're a dot on a floating rock and that your little social problem in some random bar is not a big deal. Overcome it by minimizing it.
6) Become aware of what your biology is doing to you. When we get negative social feedback in a new environment, our biology begins to feel threatened and the "I'm unsafe in this new environment" biological circuit kicks in. Become aware of the unsafe brain kicking in, and consciously re-create your social reality when you feel it creeping in. This can also be viewed as a type of "in-field meditation", IMO. When it happens, become aware, open another set, try again, and get a positive social feedback loop going despite any feedback you get. Use your CONTROL MUSCLE to let the Winner effect take hold of you, and then use your RELEASE MUSCLE when flow is initiated.
7) DEPENDANCE / NEEDINESS IS RUINING YOU. This may sound "self-helpy" on the surface but it is actually the CORE and FOUNDATION of being strong socially. You NEED people to give you a good response. Why? You NEED to live up to other people's standards. Why? Why do you need your best shirt when you go out? Why do you need the perfect haircut to be successful? Why do you need to make 100k/yr before you pull? Become aware of the blocks and limits you're creating for yourself & let go of them. Life is right now. Become the person you want to be right now. Stop waiting. Stop being needy. Fix yourself emotionally, unwind your strings, and see clearly.
Summary: Someone who can't talk forever has some "unwinding" to do, and questions to ask. To make it as simple as possible to understand:
You can't talk forever because you are valuing someone else higher than yourself.
Once you learn how to value yourself more or as much as the person you're talking to, the rest comes naturally. EZ example: You can talk for years to your little niece, but not to the guy you're trying to make a business deal with.
Real summary: Love yoself
Just what I was trying to find in the comments! :) Thanks, man!
@@exnihilonihilfit6316 Of course bro
Great summary my friend. Go crush your week of copywriting!
Thx broo awesome job ill come back to this comment many times💓
Thanks
How can i copy this info?
Let's leave this life with as few regrets as possible.
Ya good to think that -Tyler
💙💜💚
@MarsHolst20 hell yes!!
"Better to regret what you did than the things you could've done."
This mindset helps with singing as well. Release release release, the less you try to control, the more control you have
Good and yes same here! -Tyler
Yep definately bro, also singing amd needed to talk loud/shout in a club expells a shhit tonne of harmful mucus from the nose and lungs
100% man
AMAZING video, man!!! Curshing it! 🔥👊
Tnx bro! -Tyler
I miss puppet master julien 😕😔
YOU BLOW MY MIND. This man is literally serving us the secret to life! Thank you so much
Thanks! -Tyler
Trying to be perfect shows that you care too much.
7:25 1. everything that you say has value because it comes from you
8:27 2. everything you say has value because it is your perspective. You're adding value.
9:24 3. Lower the bar for how good it has to be. It's not what you say, it's that you're interested in it. That's what matters. Your interest. You don't have to be perfect. In fact, stop trying to be perfect.
25:12 everything you do should be aimed toward avoiding being dependent and needy.
Never thought I would come back after all these years, but here we are. Thank you, Owen, I will always owe you one.
Thank you for this grounding tutorial. I needed this. I've been on a journey that's similar to your early days. My brain unlocked this summer for about 3 months and I felt my winner effect after a long time. It was fucking amazing. After picking up many girls and conversing with many people and overcoming the depression I easily found a girlfriend. After becoming obsessive and being dumped by her I lost my winner effect and my brain re-locked. I ABSOLUTELY CAN NOT WAIT TO GET THAT FEELING BACK AND KEEP IT THIS TIME. Thanks for pushing me back in the right direction.
Came here to say Thanks...4 almost 5 years working hard and now i am FREEEEE , just watching the videos...theres nothing like being free...thank u Tyler...thank u so much...
Apppppreciate it and congrats! -Tyler
Don't worry about the "perfect" thing to say. Just be authentic. People can sense that shit.
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Consistent gym visits can correct so many things to begin with. Practicing what I just preached.
*real**
Yeah, i'm always hesitant to be confident and honest...especially when it's a sort of negative thought or something thats likely to cause confrontation. It does leave me with a feeling so palpable that i swear people can feel it too. But i never know if i would be better off saying fuck it and being 100% honest because it's true to my beliefs/feelings or if i should just avoid the conflict entirely because it's a waste of time and energy.
@@Oh_its_Mike read Letting Go by David R Hawkins...
k gonna tell ppl i gonna kill myself
I love that you said everybody’s energy is like a unique snowflake. It’s so at odds with the character you named yourself after who would literally tell people “you are not a beautiful or unique snowflake.” 😂😂 definitely shows a lot of growth over the last 20 years
God I love you man
I've seen you do a few videos on how to never run out of things to say.
This one absolutely resonates with the viewers.
You're actually helping me Tyler. It's like you've heard me, known me and spoken to me before. Everything you've said is answering questions I have always had about the things I need to work on. Thank you so much for everything!
Good stuff, that's the goal! -Tyler
Owen man, thank you again, it's so hard for me at times because I easily forget the practical stuff when it comes to basic skills. It's quite funny really, as an artist I totally understood when you said in previous videos how you struggle not to fall into that "giver" category all the time. And that really got me hooked on self-help again after following the dating stuff for years before, to the point where even my family ask how it's all going and what i've learned from you guys! They ask this because I used to (still often am) very shy, anxious, awkward, feeling like i don't fit in, and if it weren't for you recommending the Power of Now in one of your (much older) vids I think five years ago, and for teaching me how to view life in a healthier manner, it's pretty likely that I wouldn't be here. You and the other RSD guys actually helped me to become aware of things so much to the point where I no longer needed my anti-depressants, and no longer self-harmed. I'm so grateful. I definitely fall under the "destructive artist" as Julien calls it (haha! xD) and each day is something new that I have to work on, and which strangely enough, keeps me grounded and focused on my bigger and smaller goals in my now hilarious life. A HUGE THANK YOUUU :D
It is actually insane how insightful this information is, I would really wish more people understood these basic principals
The Robert Sapolsky reference keeps guys like Tyler at the top of heap when it comes to 'social reprogramming'. Bravo. #alphaIQ
Owen...you really changed my life..The day when i found u and julian ... It changed me completely. Thank u
Thank you Tyler, love how you hustle to make and keep the quality videos, cheers from Argentina
I used to live in Ricoletta and Palermo for three months. Cheers! -Tyler
OWEN IS THE GOAT!! HIKING AND GIVING A FREE MOTIVATIONAL SPEECH?! INSANE WORK ETHIC!!
I love how in the last couple minutes no one even so much as looks at you... all this “caring about what others think” is so much in the mind!
Great video by the way Owen🤘🏻🔥
Crazy right, that's why I do it here! -Tyler
*"Do you ever secretly wish that I would just tell you everything to say for the rest of your life ._. "*
That made me laugh way harder then it should've
@pedro GUNZ ceballos word
OG fans remember the hot girl and waterfall from tylers older video
Yes commented on this in the pinned comment - CJ Sparxx on Insta -Tyler
OG? nah, that is a pretty recent video for us that have been following rsd from the beginning 😄😋
TIMESTAMP NIGGAS!!!!
Communists say no more hot girls.
If you sound passionate enough about it, anything I say is gold
It's crazy that I've listened to this advice thousands of time, but after I grow of see something work out in the real world, rewatching the video I learn things I didn't know before
For some reason I always come back to this particular video, I have to watch it every now and then, it's so inspirational to me
I just watched this before meeting up with a girl and it was extremely helpful. I think his point of not trying too hard is very very important to emphasize. Thanks Owen! You're the man.
The poor cameraman who had to do this whole hike backwards 😂
This works. guys i applied it whatever tyler said in this video and got the results you're only one step away from that experience and that feeling which tyler was talking about.
All you need is just courage to speak up.
These atmospheric/retrowave songs you started incorporating in your videos are the shiznet. Adds another level of enjoyment for me. Keep it real Tyler!
We are all born perfect.It is external influences like media and people we know who make us think otherwise.
Everyone's perfect for their own life, not the one made by social narratives
Low key one of the best videos
Owen changed my life.
Don't oversell or be too good
Just have regular talk
Everything you say is awesome.
Your Perspective has Value. (Celebrity)
Lower the bar
Making boring interesting
Talk Gibberish, let go, don't get in Your own way.
Release muscle flow
Wow man incredible video!! Thanks for sharing !!!
Always posted just as I need them!!
Yow owen I just wanna say thank you for all the years you've been unconsciously helping me throughout my life. Keep it up.
Ps. You helped me on my first break up like 5 or 6yrs ago, and now. Freshly single from a 2yr relationship.
I shook the Magic 8 ball, and it came up “BALLS”. Thanks a lot Jeffy.
And yea, this is definitely the area I’m stuck at: feeling safe to be charismatic. I’m just not sure how to get my brain to turn on. I feel like I understand the problem, but I just continue to clam up again and again. Very frustrating!
I try to remind myself to be more silly. It’s a work in progress.
Get your heart to turn on 💓 We got you, bro
It's not getting your brain to turn on, and you can't remind yourself to be more silly. You have to let go of whatever suppressed emotions are harboured inside yourself that are stopping you from being carefree. How? Read Letting Go by David R Hawkins.
@@retardedphil bro this is the real deal ^^
The concept of "internal value" seems cool and all, but how would one ACTUALLY go about achieving it? 🤔 I understand that one shouldn't rely on external circumstances to feel confident and social, but what are the PRACTICAL steps to achieve this?
You don't think you have value? 🤔
I feel internal value is provided through taking action on things that fulfill you
By making meaningful goals for yourself and seeing yourself progress towards them. As you achieve more and have experience failing and pushing through it to succeed you become more confident and value yourself more. Define "meaningful" any way you want but it's better if the goal doesn't just help you but those around you. Negative emotions are signs of problems that need to be fixed or things you need to learn. Hard work and persistence is not only rewarded materially but emotionally, so get to work.
@dvt32 if you want to know the Answer.... buy the 1997 seminar bundle
The practical steps are letting go of what's telling you that you're not confident internal to begin with. View it like this: I am already fulfilled and confident etc, but something has convinced me that I am otherwize. You will REALIZE internal value as you let go of everything that tells you otherwize. I would suggest you to go watch julienhimself's videos to get a better grasp around this. I am personally on his program called Transformation Mastery Academy which is all about letting go of traumas, negative beliefs and anything that keeps you from living an authentic, healthy and happy lifestyle.
Listen man, this is one of the Best videos I watched lately. So Thanks. Really, Thanks.
From a nerdy introvert out there 👍
Thank you so much, it completely changed me the next day.
Fantastic vid and I'm glad you kept going to get out of the darkness!
This vid + the truth about successes (1,3,4) are my faves.
Had my brain turned on in different periods and it is simply phenomenal how natural you become and everything you say is just gold!
These videos are a blessing. I’m very grateful. Each new video made is so helpful. Thank you Thank you Thank you 🙏🏾
Tyler 100% spot on again here.
To win one has to expect to win, plan to win, and prepare to win.
Another great content video by owen! , it really opens my mind, a pure truth, no fillters or bullshit there isn't a secret for success, it's all about the same urges and natural behaviour we have as human beings.
greetings from israel
Yes awesome! -Tyler
Update to one of your all time GREAT vids imo. So greatful for this you have no idea Owen. Thanks.
Such an epic story! Thank you! I have been in this state when I have felt safe with people I trust, and also while doing improv. A place where I feel that there will be no negative life consequences of my actions. This is where pure creativity lies, I find.
Literally saving my life rn, thinking i was just not the same person
This content is free....
Thank you Owen.
Thanks Owen, You’re a living Legend 🙌
Deeply rooted..Self worth..i see is it more of me just being myself and also convincing myself to be more in the moment?
Thank you, Owen. This was very informative and help for me. I've experienced this same experience and feeling too! I just never knew how to translate it into words. And how make it more consistent. Going to let it settle and apply it now. Also beautiful editing and scenes!
Thank you for this video, owen! You speak truth.
Thanks!! -Tyler
But how do I talk to my granny? Give me the line, Owen.
Hey, hot mama, how you doin?
What’s baking, nana?
I have a big walking stick also, wanna see nan?
Talk about bingo
Thanks for the great advice, guys 😄
Crazy!! Thanks for this brother. I will apply! Peace & much continued success!
Watching a 2nd time! Wow! Thank you T!
Keep Rockin Owen! Best video I've seen from you in a while. Thank you!
Love you man!!
Never enough of you! thanks.
Skipped to the "most replayed" part and it didn't disappoint😏 22:09
Internal value is important
Thanks
Unbelievable! Such valuable message, Gold! . So much value!
tyler i love the direction your going, with the thumbnails the content! you're so cool!
For some reason, charisma does attract women. I am very charismatic and whenever I talk like Tyler here, girls are like WTF? Give me those emotions baby. I love being this way and I figured out over time that you can turn it on or off at will. Using your body to express yourself is how you do this. Pay attention to Tyler's body language and how he speaks with gestures. This is charisma at its highest form. A girl that I am dating said how do you fucking do talk like that? I simply said practice, honey.
When you understand what someone else experiences, and get outside your insecurities, you realize people are sensitive to ENERGY -Tyler
@@OwenCookSelfHelp Thanks for the reply Tyler. I use to be super insecure and now I just let things FLOW and bring positive vibes to everyone. I've noticed huge differences in my social interactions when I bring the charisma so I just decided to leave it on at all times lol.
I’ve become so fuckin alpha in all areas of my life by going out. Thanks Owen 😊
Thank you for this piece of gold. Looking forward to your next uploads. Peace
Incredible video man! So nuance and on point! Would love to hear your knowledge about having an internal sense of value! That would be great! Keep it up!
Appreciate it! -Tyler
-This is beautiful. Thanks for the awesome scenery! Audio is fantastic.
-Thank you for doing research into where the best success comes from!
Appreciate it -Tyler
Love you man! Keep it up, you're changing people
Hey Owen I know that feeling you're talking about, I feel that same way when i have good interactions
thx for the tips... great content! I discover you yesterday!
Tyler: Folow my friend on ig
17:19 Me: Hold on, now i have to go
Haha yes follow my ex CJ! -Tyler
She is on Pornhub as well! hahah
You do a great work thinking about this so important things. Congratulations and thank you
Thanks for allowing me to discover Ulrich Shnauss.. amazing
He's great -Tyler
Dude literally just talked about the exact freaking thing I'm experiencing. It's madness. Especially when he talks about "this environment is safe" mindset. Toxic friends cam fuck up your mindset.
Thanks Tyler for such useful insights!
Very important video!!! Thank you so much Owen!
Exectly the video I needed right now. thanks as always, Owen.
I reckon this is his best video so far, defs worth a watch
Appreciate it! -Tyler
I remember you teaching us this stuff at the hot seat bro, great refresher
My man needs to take a walking break so he can keep giving us good content or else he gon collapse.
hehehe, just starts breathing really heavy and shaky near the end, until he falls over and the vid just cuts out. 😆
hehehe, just starts breathing really heavy and shaky near the end, until he falls over and the vid just cuts out. 😆i
@@theperson8275 lmao he just starts convulsing towards the end, eventually slipping into rigor mortis and the video fades out. I have so much love for this human being.
i love you tyler
You too! -Tyler
Nathaniel Branden. The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem - the great book for boost self-confidence
Ty Tyler you really know how to make one think. Last time i wented out i had a good time just forgetting about impressing people and just saying here i am. But ended being played by i girl i asked out 5-10mins after she asked me to follow her and her girlfriend. that hurt a bit. But other then that i feeled more free then i have been i long while.
It’s is all about what opens up the brain. We can be in an illusion that we are living happy but are is just turned off. We numb our brain with too much stimulus. We must grow out of this and expand our brain to fail. Fail is to grow just as Julian said. Just because your experience is negative it isn’t bad,instead be happy that your about to grow. You are gonna grow by failing no mater what. By failure you open the brain even more. By socializing we joke and create a euphoria affect with our friends that we are at home and love each other with no judgements Also opening our brain. We can all feel this. Feel when the brain is open and when it is closing it is what can creat the vibe we love in.
Yes exactly -Tyler
Tyler what really hit it home for me, was the part you said that you were obsessed with socializing because of that feeling or euphoric experience you get when the environment is your friend. I love for you to say that more and I hope you have a good day.
Epic as usual. Going out tonight to vibe some more with the world 👌🏾
Love the video Tyler, could you make a vid about group environment? I feel like a child when im in the middle of a group conversation, I feel like there is something I don't understand about it
I will! -Tyler
Very nice, this was a very rich tutorial. Thank you
Awesome vid. Looking more pimp every time! Cheers from Kingston , Ontario. - Jack
Ayyy I made a video on this too! Thank you Owen for all the knowledge you’ve shared that’s allowed me to grow more than I ever could have imagined💪🏼
I wonder if this effect could be engineered?
Consider a service where you plant maybe a dozen people in a crowd, then have them go up to the customer and get them primed for brain activation.
Wow. Nonstop content 🔥. What a beast. Thanks Tyler ✌
Pure gold awesome text just what I needed
Great video! Best I’ve seen on this topic
Tyler words is much more chewable when hiking liking this
Woooo chew me! -Tyler
Thank you. 🙏🏻