I'm becoming the best version of myself financially, physically, spiritually, emotionally to get marry to my future wife. Ya Allah Grant me wife and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous. Please pray for me to get a righteous wife, I'm in search of her.. ameen
Wish you the best And the best thing ever is to become a muslim Islam is the religion of all the prophets, including Adam, Noah, Abraham, Moses, Jesus and Muhammad Peace be upon them all, it's the true religion The straight path to the worship of Allah (the Almighty) and His Paradise Islam is the monotheist true religion: ua-cam.com/video/01OTH6McsnA/v-deo.htmlsi=5tGFEcQJn4enLXj- First pray to the Almighty the creator and ask him to guide you to his true religion then with a sincere heart, eager to know the truth, read the Quran.
I've spoken to my family about the same thing, I recently turned 21 onto 22 in a few months, alot of people that are my age are currently marrying etc, my close family members encouraged me to also take that step, however I'm in a bad space mentally, I have a lot of things to unpack and I really want to work on my relationship with Allah, I want to make that a priority especially now since I don't have immediate responsibilities, I'm not against marriage, it's just that I feel like as long as I'm not happy with the space I'm in currently, I'll never be able to properly give and receive the love that my future spouse deserves, and I don't want my judgement to be clouded by the anger and whatever I have that needs to be worked on, I'm so glad I came across this video, it really validated what I've been trying to explain to friends and family for so long and felt like the words were being thrown to deaf ears, can't wait to watch more videos❤️
May Allah keep you on the straight path, and make you steadfast on your deen, forgive your sins for the sake of your akhira, and bless both you and your family with a lot of goodness in this dunya
SubhanAllah you really explained what ive been thinking and feeling for so long, im 23 and have been feeling this but couldnt quite explain it the way u did, thanks for makng it more clear for me, i hope and pray that it works out for you, that you find peace in Allah and yourself, May Allah bless you in every way possible
@@sunsettttttt Aameen, I'm so glad my words brought comfort to someone, just know you're not alone and inshaAllah, we will be in a better place, May Allah bless you with immense peace and barakah and fulfill all your dreams and Duas ❤️
What people need to understand most is that you must never share what piques your interest or what type of man/woman you're into as people would try and fake it to earn your trust for a temporary time. And another important thing, your mind should not be fixated on finding a spouse one after another, faith is important and you have to leave it in Allah (Swt) power that you may find the right one. Whereas your job is to be aware of the kind of people you may actually come across and dictate if they're the one you should marry or to be with.
@@alyzak.8997 are you a child? Trust should NOT exist in the beginning. It should grow gradually and eventually when the other person earns it(likewise for you to earn that trust yourself) But maybe you'll understand that as you grow up In'shaa'Allah
Also be aware that people lie and try to make themselves into a person you want them to think they are just to manipulate you into them getting whatever they want . And they could have bad intentions .
Unmarried folks out here, here's a bit of hope for y'all. Recite this dua to get a pious spouse in which we all could find peace in. I pray we all find the missing part of ours soon, In Shaa Allah.. رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ " " وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا (“rabbana hablana min azwajina wa dhuriyyatina qurrata A’yunin waj’alna lil- muttaqina imama”) “Our Lord, grant us from among our pious spouse and offsprings comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous.” (Surah Furqan:74)
This is a great talk. I think in some ways though it is more pertinent to those who have access to potentials. For a lot of males, the opportunity to meet prospective partners is much more limited, so then there is the tendency to try to make it work with someone who is 'not your person'. Much of the problem is a communal issue, as in, networks are just not there for a lot of people. There is also the element of skillful vetting. Traditionally, it were the male guardians that would vet a prospective husband for the daughter, and then after he was approved based on sound judgement and rational analysis, the daughter would be free to see how she feels about him. That was a much more viable option because she can trust in the judgement of her male guardians, allowing herself to be less on guard when meeting him. In today's world, the woman has to do both the vetting and the emotional investing as the way to guide her judgement. And one of the biggest mistakes women make is making a long term decision based on short term feelings, which is how they get manipulated so often.
Alslam alikum wa rahmatu Allah wa brakatu My dear nople sister may Allah bless you The correct and obligatory hijab includes covering the face with the whole body , and this is the hijab of the female companions and the mothers of the believers, After the revelation of the ayah of hijab in the Qur’an, the female companions responded to it by covering their faces immediately The jilbab is a thick, very wide fabric that is placed on top of the head and covers the entire body until it covers the feet and exceeds them in length it does not and must not reveal any part of the body or describe its size or shape even the head and shoulders This means that it is not right to wear a blouse or jacket that describes the shape of the shoulder as a hijab which all do also it is not right to wear the scarf tightly on the head, and the hijab must not be adornment in itself, and if you browse pictures of Muslim women in all Islamic countries 100 years ago, you will find them all covering their faces. Women uncovered their faces after the western colonization and the secular rule, and you are all full of good insha'Allah and not less than the previous Muslim women to strive in obeying Allah and implementing His command May Allah grant you all success and happy life in this world and the hereafter Wish you the best The correct hijab according to the Qur’an| Muhammad tim humble: ua-cam.com/video/xq15cmNFrpQ/v-deo.htmlsi=RD3ABLP_ejHlDDFC
This felt like a facetime call from an older sister. This was lowkey eye opening subhanAllah even though I'm not looking to get married right now. very Logical Allahumabarik sister, JazakAllah.
This search is so hard. I have been trying. I have a very black and white approach and always keep my path clear for the right person ie not entertaining someone who clearly isnt for me. The actual search and where to look is the hardest part.
AlHamduLillah💛😊‼️I feel good being single AlHamduLillah and I don't mind breaking it off when I don't feel like we would have a better life together. My life is good alone, I'm looking for better together ❤️ ✨️ 😌 💛 ‼️
What an amazing perspective, ill always been like this, as soon as i find out that person is not for me, i detach easily and give them room to figure it out or atleast try to reach a reasonable compromise between us both. Once we establish that a compromise is not possible and we must go our seperate ways, i completely detach, emotionally and physically. Many people use this as an excuse to defame you and point out that you were never loyal to them or the relationship at any point since the withdrawal was so easy and painless. I try to not let this affect me but it does.
If we faced a problem about spouse,then we seek the solution from the literature created by author's that no connection to the almighty,the spouse gonna be rough. Salute to you.
To be honest, as a muslim married and alhamdulillah happy man for 7 years now, i am like against half what she said, even if i understand where she’s coming from, and her sincerity in wanting good for everyone, i agree with her on the fact, marriage should be seen exqctly as business, we need planning, working, and praying a lot ( do never forget that part, we muslims, in everything we do, we do have a theoritical basis which is from Allah comes everything, then we have a practicl basis which is working hard to reach that) ....... also i agree with her, we need to know what we are searching for in order not to try to embelish everyone the more we become desperate, and also agree with the fact you should never take rejection as personal, thats the same loser mentality that keeps people quitting on the the first obstacles....... BUT I DO NOT AGREE AT ALL, with the concept of the ”soul mate” out there for you, thats a childish christian concept because they cant divorce according to the belief, marriage is for life whatever what will happen..... thats is not a realistic concept, that is not an islamic concept...... the islamic concept is that Allah put enough attraction and kindness between men and women in order to overshadow all the differences of personality and behavioir and objectives that can be between two persons, thats exactly why marriage is half of one’s religion..... Allah will help you via that attraction and passio and love to overcome the differences, to forgive the mistakes, to accept some bagage, and so on..... its not a journey where you meet a pincess or a knight in shiny armor, that concept is for kids..... in reality you are good for thaousands and thaousands of people to be married to as long as you are merciful and compassionnate enough...... trying to tell us that one person only is for you frlm your country pool for example, means you have 1 chance in millions to find that person..... its an impossible task..... just be mature enough, find what 10 traits you want in a person..... try to see some persons like in a business in order to check the market and see your real value according to the market so that you can choose what you can abandon from those 10 traits (for example) to give yourself more chances and what are the traits you cant abandon....... if you cant abandon some, and you think you cant change your lifestyle your behaviour or abandon some goals for another person..... its means you cannot share a life, you are too childish to be married, please dont mess up another one’s life
Brother, it is said everyone's spouse was already written just like your rizq. The same way an apple from a tree in a whole different continent gets shipped and finds it's way to you and only you because it was part of your rizq. What were the chances, next to impossible, right? The same way your spouse will find his/her way to you by the will of Allah. So you can't say it's impossible, nothing is impossible for Allah.
I want to point out that she never mention 'soulmate' per se, she mentioned the one 'best' for you, hence she drew the diagram showing different people and pointed out that one person, while I agree that we have to overlook certain flaws and some things are inevitable, we must understand that while we're looking for someone, with the help of Allah, we should try and align our traits/ qualities for a better understanding between spouses in the future, you must understand that people grow and learn in different environments, and what's acceptable for one cannot be for another, that's why people go through various different people to meet 'the one', it doesn't mean that this person will stay forever, only Allah knows best about that, it means that this person is in line with my beliefs and values as close as possible, not 100% obviously but as close as possible, the rest is in Allah's hands. I also agree that some people 'box' others in the soulmate category and refuse to do anything, and are not willing to work on themselves etc, but Allah has written someone for us, we should ask Allah to make it easy for us to find the one that will help us get closer to Allah, May Allah make it easy for all of us❤️
can't put everything on Allah, my dude. You have to put a lot of work in yourself. Allah help those who help themselves. Other than that, I agree with you.
wow i just want to say after this video it changed a lot about my perspectives about things , you explained everything so clearly and straight to the point .thank you lama!
Saving this in my notes and pinning it! Literally the perfect video for me right now SubhanAllah. Lately I’ve been dealing with external pressure to settle. Even within myself it’s been a challenge. Jazakhallahu Khairun for sharing your wisdom with us sister ❤️
@abdullaal-obaidi833 salaam brotha! first, i begged Allah for a good wife mindful of Allah. and then, after a lot of potentials, i met her on tiktok. she posted islamic reminders, and i post quran. i messaged her, and then Allah guided us to a humble nikaah. we are both from london, england
Non emotional non judgmental rational decision is I just have love to give love isn’t always words and if it isn’t words than that means I can love you from a distance so as I sit here feel my love and let it transform you and make you more peaceful and not want to kill yourself or hate everyone or always be angry!!! Smile because today is a new day and everything is going to be ok!!! I love you and don’t forget that!!! HAVE A GOD DAY
The truth about finding your spouse. So all of the other failed relationships were when we were not our healthy best selves? And only mine for a time? What lessons we learned or didn't learn?
I just wrote down things i want in a potential partner and to my surprise those were the same things i wanna see in myself too. So i got the answer that in order to have a person like this in my life i have to be like one and that blow my mind
I've been going with perspective it's helping a lot ,the fact that you don't get attached emotionally is very important, as you perfectly said you think about it as a business partner with a very clear requirements set.
Sister what you said at the end is soo beautiful and motivational that when one leaves everything to Allah has trust in Allah and works towards whatever he is doing whilst having certainty that Allah is with me all of this journey then that’s when he becomes successful. It is Stated In a Hadith that when one starts to concentrate on his fard acts mainly fard acts he is most beloved to Allah. I notice people do much and go beyond their limits and don’t realise that even in the obligatory acts that Allah has ordered you to do this will make you successful in both worlds . And Also people are concentrated on what the other people think of him he should concentrate on what he wants to be and try to succeed there is a saying very known amongst the Arabs من جد وجد. That when one tries he will be come successful. So try to be the best you can obviously you are gonna have those days where you feel down but don’t let that drag you down and get get up from where you took a break and try again and make dua a lot also because the Hadith states that. Dua is a weapon of a believer so like sister said the more you try to involve yourself in the din the more stronger his dua his dua is and the faster he can get married and when making dua for a spouse don’t say I want this souse I want this this spouse no just request to Allah oh Allah whatever spouse you have decreed for me you are the best of planners get me married to her. I hope sister reads this 😊😊😊 and corrects me if I have said anything wrong جزاكم الله خيرا
Randomly stumbled upon this video. I would have to say, one of the best, eloquently and logically explained and discussed the topic. Touched several important points. As you correctly said, Ummah severely needs guidance on these topics. I hope the Ummah can take advantage of your expertise and knowledge, sister. JazakAllah khair.
Best one..i am 31..and planning to get married(its already too late i guess XD), but the problems i am facing finding a life partner is real..and then all on a sudden i got this video on my list, maybe Almighty Allah wanted me to get the gist of it...thank you sister for your effort coz this really helps
@alyzak.8997 all praise is for Allah, Lord of everything that exists; the Most Compassionate, Most Merciful; Him alone we worship and Him alone we ask for help [Allah's Quran, Surah:] 1-Al-Fãtihah
I only want one thing, “Leave me alone. I want to live the values I have on my own. Neither do I not want anyone to make a mess in my life nor does anyone have to make a mess in my life.” I do not know why her video popped up on my screen but she is very realistic about the topic. Very smart young woman !
@alyzak.8997 all praise is for Allah, Lord of everything that exists; the Most Compassionate, Most Merciful; Him alone we worship and Him alone we ask for help [Allah's Quran, Surah:] 1-Al-Fãtihah
In my experience, most women care about secured jobs or businesses and money in men. At last, some could find someone like that, and the other got to marry a person who was suggested by their family. These things and planning, I didn't believe 😂. I'm not a sexist, I'm just telling the reality 😅.
What can man say, Alhamdullillah, if it Was not the best thing for me for the time being I would not be alone. Allah always gives the best to us. So I am better off being alone while thinking “ why I am alone “. And when married it is the best for me to be married at that time. In both cases All praises to the God. I choose to wait instead of marrying to a non believer or to a mushreek who thinks that she is Muslim although she is not. Allah knows the best. Slowly approaching to 30s and all my hopes are tied to jannah already. May Allah grant it to us.
amazing video and advice. if more young people truly understand the message in the video , people wouldnt suffer unnecessarily and find their spouse sooner.
Salam sis, I love the way you deliver this message. Your videos are very practical. Question - How do we come to terms with the fact that we may get married later in life than we originally planned? I believe Allah has the best for me, but I recognize it may not come on my timeline. How can I be at peace with that realization?
May Allah write for you and destine for you the khayeer. Please always remember that any fates Allah decreed for you is the good thing for you. And don't give up on asking him to get married the righteous one. Amen ya rab.
Simple. If there’s anyone you like, you observed something nice in them, you may approach them by clearly stating your intentions to know them. If they agree. Cool. If not, then like she said, move on. Nothing personal
@abbyk7341 aameen :) i hope Allah grants a good spouse for you, too. we met and agreed on marriage in 2 days in july and got married on sep 2. monday, the day the Messenger of Allah ﷺ was born and me too!
Many people misinterpret the idea that "relationships before marriage are forbidden in Islam." As a Muslim, it's important to know your limits. You can take your time to find the right spouse while maintaining distance. Be cautious, as you don’t know someone’s past or intentions. Focus on finding someone with good qualities, as advised by scholars. Remember, don’t sacrifice your akhirah for temporary enjoyment. Choose wisely!
@alyzak.8997 all praise is for Allah, Lord of everything that exists; the Most Compassionate, Most Merciful; Him alone we worship and Him alone we ask for help [Allah's Quran, Surah:] 1-Al-Fãtihah
This is where the family role comes in and it's all halal btw you go to your mother or father or any other person in your family or very close circle maybe even your imam and tell them you're looking for a wife/husband and they'll help you filter all the good families and their children that are available and also looking for spouses and then you meet them with their family and yours in tow and if it doesn work out then you know to look for someone else and so on until allah leads u to the right person
@@YaAllahswttry to integrate a muslim community, find people in mosques or restaurants etc.. when you go out of your way to avoid haram, i promise you Allah will make everything easy for you
I enjoyed this video, but I am curious for further explanation on this point. If marriage is a skill, how are people who have no business being married married? They are emotionally unavailable, immature, all round bad behavior yet are married.
@@alyzak.8997 all praise is for Allah, Lord of everything that exists; the Most Compassionate, Most Merciful; Him alone we worship and Him alone we ask for help [Allah's Quran, Surah:] 1-Al-Fãtihah
I’m engaged for 1 year now and my marriage is fixed for next year. I still have my doubts if this is the man for me. Somewhere in my heart I feel this wedding is not going to happen anyway so don’t stress out. All my friends who are engaged are very happy about their life and it’s just me with all this confusions. I’ve been making a lot of duas lately asking Allah to not make this happen if I won’t be happy. What do I do
Change "approach" so it's less daunting. A small wave or smile or something might be a better first step than walking up and opening a conversation with a stranger. Maybe that's enough to make them comfortable to walk to you, you'd never know unless you tried!
Im italian and converted to islam. Where can i find a good serious muslim man to marry? There arent many muslims here and my family is not muslim so i dont know anyone
My entire instagram is all about helping Muslims find the right spouse for them and I LOVEE this video. You’ve explained it so well allahumma barik sis ❤❤❤
as salam aleykoum, I don’t want to get married right now as a 22 yo man because of my own flaws that I am currently treating, but also because good women who actually follow Islam rulling and not western values is very difficult to find in my country. They want a man that will pay for everything but don’t have the authority that comes with that when they are litteraly under his responsibility. More responsibility gives more authority, as man, we have more responsibilities and duties as a husband, and I embrace that, I think it’s masculinity to be the one taking care of your family 100% emotionally and financially. But as a man who preserved himself for marriage, I can’t imagine getting married to a woman who has been sleeping with men and give them the most intimate thing you can give to someone for free when I as a husband have to pay for everything to have access to the same thing, it’s not fair. More than that, I am going to pay for all the past traumas that other men did to her. So how can I find a virgin woman like me who will accept that in Islam the husband has more authority and the wife must obey him ? I know it’s very controversial because women are scared and I understand that, it’s totally okay, but they need to understand that obey is not in a dominant way, it’s in a leading loving protecting way. I am not going to wake up my wife at 3am to tell her go make me food, or see her as a dishwasher, NO, that’s not what is obedience. Obedience is being submissive to a man who showed you that he genuinely wants the best for you, take care of you and want to lead you to the best, your role as a woman when you find that man is to submit, otherwise the marriage won’t last.
So what if she is in a way, my soulmate; we shared dreams of each other, we have the same hobbies, we make up for each other's weaknesses, we love each others personality, we are the same age, names starts with A, Our birthday is a month apart and we're both holiday babies.....but her parents are racist and that's the only problem.. She doesn't have the courage to stand up in this situation, so now she says we can't be us anymore. I say, Allah matched us together when we were looking for that perfect one. I'm in her life not just for her but to help cleanse her family of racism so that they are rewarded greatly in Jannah. It's a beautiful love story and I heavily believe it wasn't all by coincidence. Any thoughts?
If she says no, it's no. Don't be a homewrecker. Plenty of fish in the pond. Sorry for the racism but you're not entitled to her. Now if she was willing to abandon her family for you then that would be another thing. You are not destined to 'cleanse' her family of racism. Only they can do that. God, you're a narcissist.
Yeah that make sense but once someone doesn't like you, you can't do shit to change it. It's also annoying having to be the bigger/better person. Ppl always think they better than the black guy but get so mad when life doesn't show that.
I am in a very huge fix right now. I have found this person who seems compatible with me in every way. He is good natured, has a nice upbringing, religious, pious, good career, loves travelling and food just like me. It was a difficult journey and this one seems like he ticks all the boxes. Here is the problem - I am not attracted to him, not in the very least and I don't ever see myself being attracted to him physically at least. Yes, emotional, intellectual and spiritual attraction can develop over time with efforts obviously. Is this a major problem? I really wanted to end my spouse selection journey here but I am super confused and adults around me do not consider this to be a major issue. any advice is helpful!
I'm not the best to offer advice, but why don't you refuse him, if the resolution for the issue still doesn't work out for you if you tried it? And then next, you should prioritize your requirements to make attraction is number one. If you haven't given a shot to the resolution .That's on you.
this is actually exactly what people looking for marriage need. well said and love the drawings. inshAllah we all find spouses written for us Ameen
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
@@mylordtakemeaway 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. Too Quick. May Allah Keep you both together and Bless you. Aameen !
@@mylordtakemeaway quite risky
I'm becoming the best version of myself financially, physically, spiritually, emotionally to get marry to my future wife. Ya Allah Grant me wife and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous.
Please pray for me to get a righteous wife, I'm in search of her.. ameen
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
best of luck bro
may Allah bless you and me with a righteous wife who's the coolness of our eyes.
Ameen
May Allah SWT bless you and grant you what is best for you in His decree........
I am not a muslim and I think this video applies for everyone, really good content
أتمنّى أن أقرأ لك يوما أنًك من المسلمين ..آمين .. 🤲🏼☘️
Wish you the best
And the best thing ever is to become a muslim
Islam is the religion of all the prophets, including Adam, Noah, Abraham, Moses, Jesus and Muhammad Peace be upon them all, it's the true religion The straight path to the worship of Allah (the Almighty) and His Paradise
Islam is the monotheist true religion:
ua-cam.com/video/01OTH6McsnA/v-deo.htmlsi=5tGFEcQJn4enLXj-
First pray to the Almighty the creator and ask him to guide you to his true religion then with a sincere heart, eager to know the truth, read the Quran.
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
@@mylordtakemeawayyou joking?
@@abdulumar-i3o no, alhamdulillah, i married on sep 2
I've spoken to my family about the same thing, I recently turned 21 onto 22 in a few months, alot of people that are my age are currently marrying etc, my close family members encouraged me to also take that step, however I'm in a bad space mentally, I have a lot of things to unpack and I really want to work on my relationship with Allah, I want to make that a priority especially now since I don't have immediate responsibilities, I'm not against marriage, it's just that I feel like as long as I'm not happy with the space I'm in currently, I'll never be able to properly give and receive the love that my future spouse deserves, and I don't want my judgement to be clouded by the anger and whatever I have that needs to be worked on, I'm so glad I came across this video, it really validated what I've been trying to explain to friends and family for so long and felt like the words were being thrown to deaf ears, can't wait to watch more videos❤️
May Allah keep you on the straight path, and make you steadfast on your deen, forgive your sins for the sake of your akhira, and bless both you and your family with a lot of goodness in this dunya
SubhanAllah you really explained what ive been thinking and feeling for so long, im 23 and have been feeling this but couldnt quite explain it the way u did, thanks for makng it more clear for me, i hope and pray that it works out for you, that you find peace in Allah and yourself, May Allah bless you in every way possible
@@1OddlyOdd May Allah accept from you and forgive you too and enter you amongst his pious and beloved servants.
@@sunsettttttt Aameen, I'm so glad my words brought comfort to someone, just know you're not alone and inshaAllah, we will be in a better place, May Allah bless you with immense peace and barakah and fulfill all your dreams and Duas ❤️
تعليقك جميل جدًا ..زادك الله قربا منه سبحانه وَ رزقك علما نافعا وَ أجرا ثابتا وَ زوجا صالحا وَ ذرية صالحة و جنّة يوم الفصل وَ الحقّ ..آمين .. 🌷
What people need to understand most is that you must never share what piques your interest or what type of man/woman you're into as people would try and fake it to earn your trust for a temporary time. And another important thing, your mind should not be fixated on finding a spouse one after another, faith is important and you have to leave it in Allah (Swt) power that you may find the right one. Whereas your job is to be aware of the kind of people you may actually come across and dictate if they're the one you should marry or to be with.
this is just sad, Zero trust from the start but ok
@@alyzak.8997 are you a child? Trust should NOT exist in the beginning. It should grow gradually and eventually when the other person earns it(likewise for you to earn that trust yourself)
But maybe you'll understand that as you grow up In'shaa'Allah
This needs more views for people who are not married but want to be married.
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
@@mylordtakemeaway Mashallah!!! allahumma barik! may allah bless you and your wife with blessings and happiness ameen!!
Also be aware that people lie and try to make themselves into a person you want them to think they are just to manipulate you into them getting whatever they want . And they could have bad intentions .
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
@@mylordtakemeaway wow, may Allah bless your marriage, ameen
@@chrzrd. it's a bot
most people pretend
@@alyzak.8997 lol I hate bots 😂 I was tryna be wholesome 😭
Jazak'Allahu'Khair Dear Ukhty Sister 💛😊😁🫂😚💯‼️
Unmarried folks out here, here's a bit of hope for y'all. Recite this dua to get a pious spouse in which we all could find peace in. I pray we all find the missing part of ours soon, In Shaa Allah..
رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ "
" وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا
(“rabbana hablana min azwajina wa dhuriyyatina qurrata A’yunin waj’alna lil- muttaqina imama”)
“Our Lord, grant us from among our pious spouse and offsprings comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous.”
(Surah Furqan:74)
Ameen ya Rab
aamiin
Amine
This is the best video on this subject, the painful truth: stop taking things personally
That's THE BEST ADVICE I have ever gotten! Jazakallah sister.
WOW u just solved all my worries and definitely given me clarity alhamdullilah.
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
@@mylordtakemeawayso? Why are you telling everyone in every comment you weirdo ??
@@mufasahm8238 be careful. Allah can start a war with you
@@mylordtakemeawaywhy would you tell people online? you know evil eye is a real thing right?
🤡
this was very helpful, may Allah reward you with Jannatul Firdaus
This is a great talk. I think in some ways though it is more pertinent to those who have access to potentials. For a lot of males, the opportunity to meet prospective partners is much more limited, so then there is the tendency to try to make it work with someone who is 'not your person'. Much of the problem is a communal issue, as in, networks are just not there for a lot of people. There is also the element of skillful vetting. Traditionally, it were the male guardians that would vet a prospective husband for the daughter, and then after he was approved based on sound judgement and rational analysis, the daughter would be free to see how she feels about him. That was a much more viable option because she can trust in the judgement of her male guardians, allowing herself to be less on guard when meeting him. In today's world, the woman has to do both the vetting and the emotional investing as the way to guide her judgement. And one of the biggest mistakes women make is making a long term decision based on short term feelings, which is how they get manipulated so often.
That’s the answer of my duaa. Allah swt. sent you
Alslam alikum wa rahmatu Allah wa brakatu
My dear nople sister may Allah bless you
The correct and obligatory hijab includes covering the face with the whole body , and this is the hijab of the female companions and the mothers of the believers, After the revelation of the ayah of hijab in the Qur’an, the female companions responded to it by covering their faces immediately
The jilbab is a thick, very wide fabric that is placed on top of the head and covers the entire body until it covers the feet and exceeds them in length it does not and must not reveal any part of the body or describe its size or shape even the head and shoulders
This means that it is not right to wear a blouse or jacket that describes the shape of the shoulder as a hijab which all do also it is not right to wear the scarf tightly on the head, and the hijab must not be adornment in itself,
and if you browse pictures of Muslim women in all Islamic countries 100 years ago, you will find them all covering their faces. Women uncovered their faces after the western colonization and the secular rule,
and you are all full of good insha'Allah and not less than the previous Muslim women to
strive in obeying Allah and implementing His command
May Allah grant you all success and happy life in this world and
the hereafter
Wish you the best
The correct hijab according to the Qur’an| Muhammad tim humble:
ua-cam.com/video/xq15cmNFrpQ/v-deo.htmlsi=RD3ABLP_ejHlDDFC
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
This felt like a facetime call from an older sister. This was lowkey eye opening subhanAllah even though I'm not looking to get married right now. very Logical Allahumabarik sister, JazakAllah.
This was really helpful, this mindset is so important. JazakAllahu khair.
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
This search is so hard. I have been trying. I have a very black and white approach and always keep my path clear for the right person ie not entertaining someone who clearly isnt for me. The actual search and where to look is the hardest part.
May Allah bless you with the right partner for you
I agree as a man as well. To hard to find a good women
How does one even start searching?
@@razzledazzle9971 How should I look? Hard to find outside, where to move?
@@razzledazzle9971 no clue.
This is the best reframing of an abundance mindset and holding the frame of the chooser rather than the chaser.
My vision has never been clearer since I discovered this
AlHamduLillah💛😊‼️I feel good being single AlHamduLillah and I don't mind breaking it off when I don't feel like we would have a better life together. My life is good alone, I'm looking for better together ❤️ ✨️ 😌 💛 ‼️
What an amazing perspective, ill always been like this, as soon as i find out that person is not for me, i detach easily and give them room to figure it out or atleast try to reach a reasonable compromise between us both. Once we establish that a compromise is not possible and we must go our seperate ways, i completely detach, emotionally and physically. Many people use this as an excuse to defame you and point out that you were never loyal to them or the relationship at any point since the withdrawal was so easy and painless. I try to not let this affect me but it does.
If we faced a problem about spouse,then we seek the solution from the literature created by author's that no connection to the almighty,the spouse gonna be rough. Salute to you.
To be honest, as a muslim married and alhamdulillah happy man for 7 years now, i am like against half what she said, even if i understand where she’s coming from, and her sincerity in wanting good for everyone, i agree with her on the fact, marriage should be seen exqctly as business, we need planning, working, and praying a lot ( do never forget that part, we muslims, in everything we do, we do have a theoritical basis which is from Allah comes everything, then we have a practicl basis which is working hard to reach that) ....... also i agree with her, we need to know what we are searching for in order not to try to embelish everyone the more we become desperate, and also agree with the fact you should never take rejection as personal, thats the same loser mentality that keeps people quitting on the the first obstacles....... BUT I DO NOT AGREE AT ALL, with the concept of the ”soul mate” out there for you, thats a childish christian concept because they cant divorce according to the belief, marriage is for life whatever what will happen..... thats is not a realistic concept, that is not an islamic concept...... the islamic concept is that Allah put enough attraction and kindness between men and women in order to overshadow all the differences of personality and behavioir and objectives that can be between two persons, thats exactly why marriage is half of one’s religion..... Allah will help you via that attraction and passio and love to overcome the differences, to forgive the mistakes, to accept some bagage, and so on..... its not a journey where you meet a pincess or a knight in shiny armor, that concept is for kids..... in reality you are good for thaousands and thaousands of people to be married to as long as you are merciful and compassionnate enough...... trying to tell us that one person only is for you frlm your country pool for example, means you have 1 chance in millions to find that person..... its an impossible task..... just be mature enough, find what 10 traits you want in a person..... try to see some persons like in a business in order to check the market and see your real value according to the market so that you can choose what you can abandon from those 10 traits (for example) to give yourself more chances and what are the traits you cant abandon....... if you cant abandon some, and you think you cant change your lifestyle your behaviour or abandon some goals for another person..... its means you cannot share a life, you are too childish to be married, please dont mess up another one’s life
Brother, it is said everyone's spouse was already written just like your rizq. The same way an apple from a tree in a whole different continent gets shipped and finds it's way to you and only you because it was part of your rizq. What were the chances, next to impossible, right? The same way your spouse will find his/her way to you by the will of Allah. So you can't say it's impossible, nothing is impossible for Allah.
I want to point out that she never mention 'soulmate' per se, she mentioned the one 'best' for you, hence she drew the diagram showing different people and pointed out that one person, while I agree that we have to overlook certain flaws and some things are inevitable, we must understand that while we're looking for someone, with the help of Allah, we should try and align our traits/ qualities for a better understanding between spouses in the future, you must understand that people grow and learn in different environments, and what's acceptable for one cannot be for another, that's why people go through various different people to meet 'the one', it doesn't mean that this person will stay forever, only Allah knows best about that, it means that this person is in line with my beliefs and values as close as possible, not 100% obviously but as close as possible, the rest is in Allah's hands. I also agree that some people 'box' others in the soulmate category and refuse to do anything, and are not willing to work on themselves etc, but Allah has written someone for us, we should ask Allah to make it easy for us to find the one that will help us get closer to Allah, May Allah make it easy for all of us❤️
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
can't put everything on Allah, my dude. You have to put a lot of work in yourself. Allah help those who help themselves. Other than that, I agree with you.
@@mylordtakemeaway so you can finally change your depressing username then since you are happy now with your wife and don't want to be taken away 😂
Totally off topic but i love the plants in the background
wow i just want to say after this video it changed a lot about my perspectives about things , you explained everything so clearly and straight to the point .thank you lama!
Saving this in my notes and pinning it! Literally the perfect video for me right now SubhanAllah. Lately I’ve been dealing with external pressure to settle. Even within myself it’s been a challenge.
Jazakhallahu Khairun for sharing your wisdom with us sister ❤️
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
@@mylordtakemeaway if you dont mind sharing? how did you find or meet her? may allah swt bless your marriage
@abdullaal-obaidi833 salaam brotha! first, i begged Allah for a good wife mindful of Allah. and then, after a lot of potentials, i met her on tiktok. she posted islamic reminders, and i post quran. i messaged her, and then Allah guided us to a humble nikaah. we are both from london, england
Thank you SO much! Precisely the sort of content I as a Muslim woman need. JazakAllah! :)
Non emotional non judgmental rational decision is I just have love to give love isn’t always words and if it isn’t words than that means I can love you from a distance so as I sit here feel my love and let it transform you and make you more peaceful and not want to kill yourself or hate everyone or always be angry!!! Smile because today is a new day and everything is going to be ok!!! I love you and don’t forget that!!! HAVE A GOD DAY
The truth about finding your spouse. So all of the other failed relationships were when we were not our healthy best selves? And only mine for a time? What lessons we learned or didn't learn?
I just wrote down things i want in a potential partner and to my surprise those were the same things i wanna see in myself too. So i got the answer that in order to have a person like this in my life i have to be like one and that blow my mind
I've been going with perspective it's helping a lot ,the fact that you don't get attached emotionally is very important, as you perfectly said you think about it as a business partner with a very clear requirements set.
Shukran I was needing this.. May Allah swt grant you jahnah inshallah
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
Sister what you said at the end is soo beautiful and motivational that when one leaves everything to Allah has trust in Allah and works towards whatever he is doing whilst having certainty that Allah is with me all of this journey then that’s when he becomes successful. It is Stated In a Hadith that when one starts to concentrate on his fard acts mainly fard acts he is most beloved to Allah. I notice people do much and go beyond their limits and don’t realise that even in the obligatory acts that Allah has ordered you to do this will make you successful in both worlds . And Also people are concentrated on what the other people think of him he should concentrate on what he wants to be and try to succeed there is a saying very known amongst the Arabs من جد وجد. That when one tries he will be come successful. So try to be the best you can obviously you are gonna have those days where you feel down but don’t let that drag you down and get get up from where you took a break and try again and make dua a lot also because the Hadith states that.
Dua is a weapon of a believer so like sister said the more you try to involve yourself in the din the more stronger his dua his dua is and the faster he can get married and when making dua for a spouse don’t say I want this souse I want this this spouse no just request to Allah oh Allah whatever spouse you have decreed for me you are the best of planners get me married to her.
I hope sister reads this 😊😊😊 and corrects me if I have said anything wrong جزاكم الله خيرا
Randomly stumbled upon this video. I would have to say, one of the best, eloquently and logically explained and discussed the topic. Touched several important points. As you correctly said, Ummah severely needs guidance on these topics.
I hope the Ummah can take advantage of your expertise and knowledge, sister. JazakAllah khair.
What a great speech , i thank you, you have a very good mindset that help lots of people, sure people happy to know and have you in their life.
I need all your videos in the form of a podcast please!! 😭 I’ve been waiting for something like this for ages x
Second that!
I wish this video was available 6 years ago. shukran sister.
I first read your name as "I am abou bakr".... and I was like, good on this Abo Bakr sharing his channel with others.
Jazakallah khayran for this ukhti ❤❤❤❤
Best one..i am 31..and planning to get married(its already too late i guess XD), but the problems i am facing finding a life partner is real..and then all on a sudden i got this video on my list, maybe Almighty Allah wanted me to get the gist of it...thank you sister for your effort coz this really helps
Great video 🙌🏼
At the same time also keep in mind there is no “perfect” partner in the world.
We are all the dunya version of ourselves.
This was a really great message! You confirmed a lot of things I have come to realise over the years. Thank you so much for this video!
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
@@mylordtakemeaway Hi, bot! beep boop
@alyzak.8997 all praise is for Allah, Lord of everything that exists; the Most Compassionate, Most Merciful; Him alone we worship and Him alone we ask for help [Allah's Quran, Surah:] 1-Al-Fãtihah
You spoke really well sister!!✨
I only want one thing, “Leave me alone. I want to live the values I have on my own. Neither do I not want anyone to make a mess in my life nor does anyone have to make a mess in my life.” I do not know why her video popped up on my screen but she is very realistic about the topic. Very smart young woman !
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
Solid advice. Thank you for the reminder!
This video actually makes sense to me as I witnessed this happening with my cousin.
JazakAllah khair sis for such beneficial advice! ❤ PS, Lovely blue on you
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
Alhamdulillah I'm so glad i stumbled upon this video.. Gosh ..im going through some of the emotions that you have mentioned
Dude there are like 50 soulmates out there for ya. The world is a big place.
@alyzak.8997 all praise is for Allah, Lord of everything that exists; the Most Compassionate, Most Merciful; Him alone we worship and Him alone we ask for help [Allah's Quran, Surah:] 1-Al-Fãtihah
It's difficult to find those "50 soulmates"
In a pool of 8 billion+, coming across even 1 has astronomically low odds, and only with the grace of Allah will we find the right person.
In my experience, most women care about secured jobs or businesses and money in men. At last, some could find someone like that, and the other got to marry a person who was suggested by their family. These things and planning, I didn't believe 😂. I'm not a sexist, I'm just telling the reality 😅.
Are you suggesting the people until you find the exact match you should keep moving on. Until he/she reaches inside the tomb. Wow, what great advice.
thank u so much sister.
This is so helpful! Allahuma bareek
Very useful, jazak'illahu khayran. Allah bless you.
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
What can man say, Alhamdullillah, if it Was not the best thing for me for the time being I would not be alone. Allah always gives the best to us. So I am better off being alone while thinking “ why I am alone “. And when married it is the best for me to be married at that time. In both cases All praises to the God. I choose to wait instead of marrying to a non believer or to a mushreek who thinks that she is Muslim although she is not. Allah knows the best. Slowly approaching to 30s and all my hopes are tied to jannah already. May Allah grant it to us.
amazing video and advice. if more young people truly understand the message in the video , people wouldnt suffer unnecessarily and find their spouse sooner.
Jazak Allah sister 🥰
ayo this halal girl is coming in correct. straight facts.
thank you for making it clear, now i can go find my spouse.
edit: it turns out to be a mouse
RE: I was looking for my spouse but I found a mouse
Salaam sister, this was very beneficial - coming from a guy. Thank you for this. Jazaaki allahu Kheir.
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
Salam sis, I love the way you deliver this message. Your videos are very practical. Question - How do we come to terms with the fact that we may get married later in life than we originally planned? I believe Allah has the best for me, but I recognize it may not come on my timeline. How can I be at peace with that realization?
May Allah write for you and destine for you the khayeer. Please always remember that any fates Allah decreed for you is the good thing for you. And don't give up on asking him to get married the righteous one. Amen ya rab.
how to tick the values when we hardly communicate with opposite gender? this my genuine concern.
Simple. If there’s anyone you like, you observed something nice in them, you may approach them by clearly stating your intentions to know them. If they agree. Cool. If not, then like she said, move on. Nothing personal
That's not how it works for desi muslims, that's the main issue here, we don't get to communicate much.
This is very helpful.
Jazakallahi kheir this is such a lovely video!
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
@@mylordtakemeaway allahuma barik thats amazing! May allah put barakah in your marriage
@abbyk7341 aameen :) i hope Allah grants a good spouse for you, too. we met and agreed on marriage in 2 days in july and got married on sep 2. monday, the day the Messenger of Allah ﷺ was born and me too!
ameen ya rab. thats such a beautiful story akhi may allah bless you both
I have made peace in the fact that IWill never be someone's wife or mother I have been too disappointed that I no longer care peace be upon you
Many people misinterpret the idea that "relationships before marriage are forbidden in Islam." As a Muslim, it's important to know your limits. You can take your time to find the right spouse while maintaining distance. Be cautious, as you don’t know someone’s past or intentions. Focus on finding someone with good qualities, as advised by scholars. Remember, don’t sacrifice your akhirah for temporary enjoyment. Choose wisely!
Evil men are for evil women and good men are for good women the souls attract and recognize each other and the souls also dislike each other naturally
if only it was that simple, all the world's problems would be solved xD. You are very naive
@alyzak.8997 all praise is for Allah, Lord of everything that exists; the Most Compassionate, Most Merciful; Him alone we worship and Him alone we ask for help [Allah's Quran, Surah:] 1-Al-Fãtihah
@alyzak.8997 there is a very similar ayat in the Quran, how is that naive???
@@alyzak.8997that’s from the Quran
that was so helpful thank you ❤️
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
You seems pretty logical to me
Great advice, thank you!!!
the problem with me is that I don't know how to find someone to talk to and see if he fits me ,coz I don't want to disobey Allah
This is where the family role comes in and it's all halal btw you go to your mother or father or any other person in your family or very close circle maybe even your imam and tell them you're looking for a wife/husband and they'll help you filter all the good families and their children that are available and also looking for spouses and then you meet them with their family and yours in tow and if it doesn work out then you know to look for someone else and so on until allah leads u to the right person
@@marydizzycatexactly. Get your family to help you out.
Everyone keeps saying get family. Not everyone comes from a Muslim family.
@YaAllahswt true and that's why i said anyone close from your circle and then gave an example of the local imam if u trust them 😊
@@YaAllahswttry to integrate a muslim community, find people in mosques or restaurants etc.. when you go out of your way to avoid haram, i promise you Allah will make everything easy for you
thanks for the vid okhti
Asalamu Aleyküm I am a convert from Israel born and raised here recently moved to Canada, how do I go and find the woman of my life (the Halal way)
God knows man
Seek Allah’s guidance. Make more Dua, too important to be left out.
Please frequent your local masjid and also express your wish to your local imaam. Make sure you communicate with other fellow Muslims
Facts sis loved the vid
i'm not looking for a marriage but let’ss goo
Manifesting what l want can not come true with out making dua for jalihal saliha to the onecand only creater❤
I enjoyed this video, but I am curious for further explanation on this point. If marriage is a skill, how are people who have no business being married married? They are emotionally unavailable, immature, all round bad behavior yet are married.
Because in the end, God is the planner. He made all of us a test to one another
cuz Mama and Papa set them up with another emotionally unavailable, immature person so they can be toxic together
@@alyzak.8997 all praise is for Allah, Lord of everything that exists; the Most Compassionate, Most Merciful; Him alone we worship and Him alone we ask for help [Allah's Quran, Surah:] 1-Al-Fãtihah
I’m engaged for 1 year now and my marriage is fixed for next year. I still have my doubts if this is the man for me. Somewhere in my heart I feel this wedding is not going to happen anyway so don’t stress out. All my friends who are engaged are very happy about their life and it’s just me with all this confusions. I’ve been making a lot of duas lately asking Allah to not make this happen if I won’t be happy.
What do I do
Well said sister
Ok i will learn about this
Interesting 😊
Thank you so much sister!
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
Everything you say is making sense but let me tell you something. What if nobody approaching you and u can never practice your skills?
Then you approach people and stop waiting or depending on others to take the first step
Change "approach" so it's less daunting. A small wave or smile or something might be a better first step than walking up and opening a conversation with a stranger. Maybe that's enough to make them comfortable to walk to you, you'd never know unless you tried!
nobody is perfect, so dont look for perfect ones.
Marriage is a skill. I can't even talk to my brother in an effective way. Marriage will be one of the skills I suck at then. :/
So i need to set values first
Jazakallahu Khair !!
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
Im italian and converted to islam. Where can i find a good serious muslim man to marry? There arent many muslims here and my family is not muslim so i dont know anyone
have you tried the mosque or join any religious classes insyallah
But we are separated, and we dont have any classes
@@WillyTonkaReal do the mosque accept volunteers maybe to clean the premises or cook for iftar?
marry an immigrant? XD
Unfortunately I will have to suggest you online options
My entire instagram is all about helping Muslims find the right spouse for them and I LOVEE this video. You’ve explained it so well allahumma barik sis ❤❤❤
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
What are your credentials :P
جزاك الله خيرا
well said thank you
As a soon-to-be 19 year old, this was so helpful!
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
you're adorable. May Allah bless you with a happy successful marriage.Ameen
as salam aleykoum, I don’t want to get married right now as a 22 yo man because of my own flaws that I am currently treating, but also because good women who actually follow Islam rulling and not western values is very difficult to find in my country. They want a man that will pay for everything but don’t have the authority that comes with that when they are litteraly under his responsibility. More responsibility gives more authority, as man, we have more responsibilities and duties as a husband, and I embrace that, I think it’s masculinity to be the one taking care of your family 100% emotionally and financially. But as a man who preserved himself for marriage, I can’t imagine getting married to a woman who has been sleeping with men and give them the most intimate thing you can give to someone for free when I as a husband have to pay for everything to have access to the same thing, it’s not fair. More than that, I am going to pay for all the past traumas that other men did to her. So how can I find a virgin woman like me who will accept that in Islam the husband has more authority and the wife must obey him ? I know it’s very controversial because women are scared and I understand that, it’s totally okay, but they need to understand that obey is not in a dominant way, it’s in a leading loving protecting way. I am not going to wake up my wife at 3am to tell her go make me food, or see her as a dishwasher, NO, that’s not what is obedience. Obedience is being submissive to a man who showed you that he genuinely wants the best for you, take care of you and want to lead you to the best, your role as a woman when you find that man is to submit, otherwise the marriage won’t last.
very well said
What you said about infatuation is very true.
i found my wife and we got married in 2 days, alhamdulillah! last monday!
@@mylordtakemeawayWow, that is fast!
@@mylordtakemeawaymashaallah
Love your hijab colour!
Keep making duas
So what if she is in a way, my soulmate; we shared dreams of each other, we have the same hobbies, we make up for each other's weaknesses, we love each others personality, we are the same age, names starts with A, Our birthday is a month apart and we're both holiday babies.....but her parents are racist and that's the only problem.. She doesn't have the courage to stand up in this situation, so now she says we can't be us anymore. I say, Allah matched us together when we were looking for that perfect one. I'm in her life not just for her but to help cleanse her family of racism so that they are rewarded greatly in Jannah. It's a beautiful love story and I heavily believe it wasn't all by coincidence. Any thoughts?
If she says no, it's no. Don't be a homewrecker. Plenty of fish in the pond. Sorry for the racism but you're not entitled to her. Now if she was willing to abandon her family for you then that would be another thing. You are not destined to 'cleanse' her family of racism. Only they can do that. God, you're a narcissist.
Yeah that make sense but once someone doesn't like you, you can't do shit to change it. It's also annoying having to be the bigger/better person. Ppl always think they better than the black guy but get so mad when life doesn't show that.
Why we need to find a spouse
to smesh
I am in a very huge fix right now. I have found this person who seems compatible with me in every way. He is good natured, has a nice upbringing, religious, pious, good career, loves travelling and food just like me. It was a difficult journey and this one seems like he ticks all the boxes. Here is the problem - I am not attracted to him, not in the very least and I don't ever see myself being attracted to him physically at least. Yes, emotional, intellectual and spiritual attraction can develop over time with efforts obviously. Is this a major problem? I really wanted to end my spouse selection journey here but I am super confused and adults around me do not consider this to be a major issue. any advice is helpful!
I'm not the best to offer advice, but why don't you refuse him, if the resolution for the issue still doesn't work out for you if you tried it? And then next, you should prioritize your requirements to make attraction is number one. If you haven't given a shot to the resolution .That's on you.