Ten Signs of Narcissistic Rage

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  • Опубліковано 24 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 176

  • @thescapegoatclub
    @thescapegoatclub Рік тому +113

    The delayed rage is a killer…. You just never feel safe because you can be punished for anything at any time 😢

    • @dahliafiend
      @dahliafiend Рік тому

      Shed often have a smile on her face kike when she sesdribed an ex lover being sooo much bigher than me was so creepy and casually brought up. I often felt ill but i didnt know why. My therapist doesn’t know what hoovering is or devaluing. I wish i had the wereithal to record but the love bomb and constant sex keot me off guard I lived alone with her. No friends she had countless friends many male. Even now the loneliness and injustice has made life seem surreal. As a man it’s just assumed shes telling the truth and im a bitter abuser.

    • @dahliafiend
      @dahliafiend Рік тому +6

      Ive dealt with male sociopaths but at least then people believe it

    • @cassiebennet4262
      @cassiebennet4262 Рік тому +4

      I just want it over with. The suspense is horrible.

  • @Cubic5
    @Cubic5 2 роки тому +92

    That "10 minutes later and acting as if nothing had happened" part has driven me crazy my entire life.

    • @lenebrantley221
      @lenebrantley221 9 місяців тому +5

      My coworker is this way! I do my best to avoid her and deal with her only when necessary.

    • @Victoria-c4n
      @Victoria-c4n 2 місяці тому +1

      - Yes, they expect you to pretend it never happened.

    • @rturney6376
      @rturney6376 2 місяці тому +1

      Yes 🙌

    • @JulianRedwood
      @JulianRedwood 24 дні тому +1

      Yes, from anger, yelling, name calling and being told how terrible I am, to extra kisses, hugs, cuddles and "I love you so much" out of nowhere - kept me in a state of confusion and felt so unsure about where i stood in the relationship. I always assumed the smothering with love, was her way of apologizing without saying sorry.

  • @chicane7752
    @chicane7752 2 роки тому +69

    “What just happened didn’t happen” and then you’re the one over reacting when someone else sees how upset/scared you are.
    Cue the gaslighting.

  • @terridillon3053
    @terridillon3053 2 роки тому +75

    It was in my “mothers” rage, that I finally saw the evil. No contact 30 months now. Christmas will be peaceful this year!

    • @hjlseefeld4821
      @hjlseefeld4821 2 роки тому +24

      Welcome to the club, Terri. I'm ~17 years no contact with my mom. I'm off antidepressants, dropped 100+ pounds, went on to earn Bachelors and Masters degrees, and won awards for my mentorship programs I have put into place for Women in STEM disciplines. It takes time to heal from the mother wound, but it is such a rewarding journey. Sending you lots of peace this Christmas.

    • @sunnyadams5842
      @sunnyadams5842 Рік тому +6

      YaY!!! Good for you! 🎉❤🎉

  • @raymondgross6419
    @raymondgross6419 2 роки тому +63

    In my particular case,the holding of grudges. Inability to let go of things after a decade. Never again will I tolerate this !

    • @pollytheparrot8929
      @pollytheparrot8929 2 роки тому +3

      Yeaa so true.. Same here😔❤

    • @ellenfarmer3498
      @ellenfarmer3498 2 роки тому +11

      How about grudges, and the rage held, released over decades?! From percieved things said, done to them as children 50 years ago! These types never move on!

  • @izawaniek2568
    @izawaniek2568 2 роки тому +61

    I hope people will wake up to the reality and see how many narcisists are out there. These are deeply troubled souls driven by evil forces. The only thing out is to have nothing to do with them. Thank you for your incredible help and support.

  • @chicane7752
    @chicane7752 2 роки тому +94

    One of the narcissists I knew seemed to take delight in the unusual ways he’d find to punish, making sure it was just personal enough that I knew what was happening but to other people it was “just an accident/mistake”. That way I couldn’t point out what was going on without seeming overly sensitive.
    So I didn’t.

    • @MoPoppins
      @MoPoppins 2 роки тому +16

      Definitely frustrating that narcs are so CALCULATED in their behavior, in order to always elicit this outcome…but I hope you’re able to zoom out from these situations & see that it’s pretty pathetic how THIS is how they invest into themselves to experience JOY, of all things! 😂
      Leverage their weakness-once you understand the game, YOU have the upper hand.

    • @chicane7752
      @chicane7752 2 роки тому +20

      I got the upper hand when I ended the relationship and went on to marry the love of my life - the kind of person who was I was never supposed to be good enough for. 🙂

    • @TC-gx3qn
      @TC-gx3qn 2 роки тому +13

      @@chicane7752 Exactly! Good for you!!

    • @sunnyadams5842
      @sunnyadams5842 Рік тому +3

      ​@@MoPoppins I finally understand that the onky upper hand we need to have with The Narc is LEAVING THEM ALONE!😅

    • @MoPoppins
      @MoPoppins Рік тому +2

      @@sunnyadams5842 💯 Nothing scares a narc more than making them feel invisible!

  • @zachscully
    @zachscully 2 роки тому +71

    Narcissistic rage - a terrible relationship destroyer, and an amusing tantrum of an adult toddler, once one has got some badly-needed distance from the aggressor.

    • @nils-erikolsson3539
      @nils-erikolsson3539 2 роки тому +15

      Or that could be the narcissist that make victim angry then they feel amused or nice, by watching the victims anger.

    • @tammyfitzgerald5336
      @tammyfitzgerald5336 Рік тому +2

      Absolutely not f normal the rage

  • @kennethlapointesongwriter3330
    @kennethlapointesongwriter3330 2 роки тому +31

    So it's like stepping on a landmine that you didn't know was there. What sane person thinks beforehand that someone is going to exaggeratedly take something as a huge affront and blow to their ego that they have to now punish you, plot against you, overtly or covertly, All narcs should be locked up with sociopaths and psychopaths.

  • @pizzakrydder2515
    @pizzakrydder2515 2 роки тому +84

    This rage can also result in dangerous violence so if you are in a close relationship with someone who shows this behavior, take it as a huge red flag!

  • @fooled_twice4668
    @fooled_twice4668 2 роки тому +54

    thank you for great overview. i remember when my ex-boyfriend had his first "narc rage" on me- it's incredible how they make you feel like it was YOUR fault- and i remember apologizing to him later, not the other way around! that's when they "know" they have you, and probably devalue you even more then, having passed the test that you withstand that abuse... they make sure that there will be more coming! i'm so glad to have learned about it, now. if i ever meet someone who displays this again, it will be the LAST time i see them, and NO APOLOGIES from me about it, ever! what a sucker i was!

    • @MoPoppins
      @MoPoppins 2 роки тому +9

      Don’t be too hard on yourself-the empathic won’t know that this is a “thing,” until initiated.

    • @Datb2
      @Datb2 Рік тому +6

      Omg I apologized too! I feel so silly for that and if I could take anything back it would be that! Cut them offf and never look back!

    • @Nonameforyoudangit
      @Nonameforyoudangit Рік тому +5

      You ultimately win because you got wise to what how this dude was behaving. You may meet someone like him again - or a covert version - but you know your worth. I communicated to a covert narcissist dude I 'dated' off and on that whatever we were doing wasn't working for me (Mr. Noncommittal) and wished him well. He had a temper tantrum over text and maligned me as best he could. At that point I didn't feel as bad as much as I was relieved - his nonsense confirmed for me that I made the correct decision. It gets easier. Sometimes you even may find yourself bemused by the wackiness.

    • @Cornusnuttallii
      @Cornusnuttallii 2 місяці тому +1

      @@Nonameforyoudangit Yes, same with my ex-husband. He had me thinking I was crazy. He would do things without telling me, then say he told me, but I didn't have such problem with anybody else in my life. Even up to the point that I told him I wanted to get a separation for awhile, I was second-guessing myself. Then it started. He's doing life without parole.

  • @theicemaiden5816
    @theicemaiden5816 2 роки тому +36

    The narcissist who destroyed my life used to abuse his position to punish me. He used to create negative situations when he didn't get what he wanted and then use the system to punish me for wrongs I never committed. He used to speak over me whenever I got too close to the truth and everything just ended in me giving up my standpoint just to get out of the room he used to essentially hold me hostage in until he got his own way. His own way usually resulted in my dignity on the floor and me going through hell. Then the smear campaign blew up and I couldn't take any more of the revenge mentality. In the end I had no one, not even myself.

    • @MoPoppins
      @MoPoppins 2 роки тому +7

      This is so cruel-I hope you’ve found a trap door out of this situation. 🙏

    • @theicemaiden5816
      @theicemaiden5816 2 роки тому +11

      @@MoPoppins I didn't have a choice as the aim was to force me out of my job. The only choice I had was to escape before they did the discard. Every job I go into now, I just don't care. I'm not a whole person anymore and everyone around me wants to tell me "oh well, you're moving on now" when in fact I'm just working because I don't have a choice. But nobody wants to realise the damage that has been done. He consistently tried to convince everyone that I was mentally ill. It was all so he could get me out of the way to promote his precious little mate.

    • @1accon
      @1accon 9 місяців тому

      Thnks for sharing this story. I appreciate it because its all too familiar. @@theicemaiden5816

    • @Clevelandsteamer324
      @Clevelandsteamer324 4 місяці тому

      @@theicemaiden5816gaslighting and projection. Hold onto your truth

    • @Cornusnuttallii
      @Cornusnuttallii 2 місяці тому +1

      @@theicemaiden5816 This kind of thing is why I retired early. Used to be that workmates would go out together after work on Friday night now and then. Now everybody is trying to get each other fired.

  • @livinggood6876
    @livinggood6876 Рік тому +15

    They are so entitled they think they have the right to punish people. Sickening!

  • @edgreen8140
    @edgreen8140 2 роки тому +22

    It's really over the top rage. They can't control their anger. It could be the most benign critic. They blow; defenses are just about gone.

  • @TC-gx3qn
    @TC-gx3qn 2 роки тому +21

    It is a disturbing sight, especially when it is over something miniscule. Thank you for another informative video, Darren!

  • @emka198
    @emka198 Рік тому +12

    "They suffer so they want others to suffer too"...

  • @Lynne-28
    @Lynne-28 2 роки тому +35

    Wholeheartedly appreciate this clear, concise and caring explanation! Merci!
    Fortunately, the more awarenesses, the more sure and secure confused victims will feel in making their escapes.
    I barely made it out, ALIVE. But disabled. And to take revenge, my narcissistic abuser has been slandering me ever since. Half a century of badmouthing and sabotaging my most cherished relationships. Particularly with my vulnerable offspring.
    It’s heartbreaking. But I shall never give up HOPE that the Truth shall be revealed and loving reconciliations shall evolve. 🦋

    • @fairygurl9269
      @fairygurl9269 2 роки тому +4

      Much Respect

    • @Lynne-28
      @Lynne-28 2 роки тому +5

      @@fairygurl9269 Appreciating your respectful reply! All the best to you and may your fairy wand keep working well!⭐️

  • @private755
    @private755 2 роки тому +33

    A calculating menace always threatening under the surface then he'd blame me for him having to constantly "walk on eggshells" around my already established ptsd from previous abusive relationships. As I read somewhere I would rather be healthy and alone than sick and tortured in another narcissist's presence.

    • @Mina-vr1kw
      @Mina-vr1kw 4 місяці тому +1

      Sounds eerily similar to my own situationship cause it’s never a real relationship!!!

    • @Cornusnuttallii
      @Cornusnuttallii 2 місяці тому +1

      @@Mina-vr1kw Love the term - situationship.

    • @Cornusnuttallii
      @Cornusnuttallii 2 місяці тому +1

      Yes, the "afterlife" is wonderful.

  • @elletuppen4844
    @elletuppen4844 2 роки тому +17

    This bundle of character traits ends up being a lethal cocktail against any form of resolution about any issue, big or small.
    When on the receiving end of this extreme behaviour ~ mostly rage coupled with gaslighting ~ one is first left with swirling emotional confusion and cognitive dissonance.
    Apart from the emotional and mental strain and challenge, each out of the blue attack leaves me with such deep panic in the form of physical fear and the adrenal instinct is to flee ~ so flight fright and freeze in one. This seems to just augment the narcissistic behaviour as it provides their supply and strangely justifies their actions to themselves.
    Not engaging is always recommended but one’s silence is self suffocating as the natural instinct is to want to discuss and even negotiate. Dealing with this parent for decades left me with such a warped perspective that if it wasn’t for wonderful instruction and discussion like this, I would not be able to have better perspective or cope as well as I do.
    Thank you.

    • @ellenfarmer3498
      @ellenfarmer3498 2 роки тому +2

      That is what I regret, not discussing with Mom over the decades, her bizarre, raging meltdowns, I guess us kids just got used to letting Dad handle it, as she was the love of his life, the kids were secondary. With a sister I tried to do better, I confronted ,outed her NPD, after decades of confusion over her manipulations, abusive rage attacks, it didn't help, it is hopeless with these types.

    • @SarahBW2893
      @SarahBW2893 Рік тому +1

      I have been in a state of utter confusion my whole life because of this.

  • @DartmoorPaul
    @DartmoorPaul 2 роки тому +13

    The first time I said No and stuck to it with my mum for one of her demands the rage we saw was off the scale. She’s 85yr old and the things she was saying with the venom and anger was shocking, and upsetting. “I can’t believe a son of mine is treating me like this”, “I gave birth to you”, “I am so upset you are treating me this way, why are you doing this”? She’s done it a few times since too when I’ve put a boundary in that doesn’t meet her demands, but now I am expecting it although it’s still upsetting, exhausting and confusing. And yes, like a switch she can be like nothing ever happened & no apology,

  • @CanadianBear47
    @CanadianBear47 2 роки тому +58

    Their childish response to open discussion

  • @mysticallyme
    @mysticallyme 6 місяців тому +4

    My ex used to threaten killing himself, and after years of his abuse and utter contempt for anyone and everything i got up the nerve to be mean back.
    I told him to go do it, that we, his family would be better off.
    His response was going out to the garage to get a steel rod and come back to the weight bench outside the office window where we were, and beat the thing with his rage.
    The neighbour's father overheard this and came to the fence to ask if things were okay. I told him it has just been my husband having a temper tantrum.
    He didn't win that day.
    I did leave with a police escort eventually, and have never looked back!
    It's been 1.5 years and I'm in therapy, the idea of another relationship has me in panic.
    Am determined to learn all about this to avoid other disastrous relationships from forming, this includes friendships in general, when I most recently got DARVO'd when I put up some boundaries about what was acceptable from her and what wasn't.
    Thank you Darren, I'm so glad I found your work! Your DARVO video put so much together for me. 🍀

  • @kaitlincox9714
    @kaitlincox9714 Рік тому +7

    When they throw a chair at you or burn you with a cigarette or slap you and they blatantly deny it happened. Actually rage harder when you hold them accountable. Then blame you for their actions. It's classic.

  • @roseabellmarsh
    @roseabellmarsh Рік тому +10

    I find that leading up to the rage there is a tension, you know it's coming then afterwards they are abnormally in a good mood for a few days.

  • @veronicafadel8693
    @veronicafadel8693 Рік тому +14

    Among the thousands of rages I’ve received from my husband, one of the worst was when he kicked me in the stomach while I lay sick on the bed, vomiting. He was angry because I was ill. 3:13

    • @konkylie-3000
      @konkylie-3000 3 місяці тому +1

      So the narc does not accept anyone else can be sick. No empathy, I know - but still. Upsetting to read.

  • @elestromusicgamesfun1101
    @elestromusicgamesfun1101 Рік тому +7

    I have a narcissist in my family and it's absolutley toxic! Noone dares to say something either, cause this person will go into a rage as soon as this happens.

  • @ItIsJustJudy
    @ItIsJustJudy 2 роки тому +12

    I have been on the receiving end of this from my two elder siblings. It was horrible. 😢

  • @raymondgross6419
    @raymondgross6419 2 роки тому +14

    Lived it brother

  • @gogoasainfuriata762
    @gogoasainfuriata762 Рік тому +6

    I've been told once that thanks to him, I am where I am and who I am. And another time, another person told me that he gave up everything for me. How in the world I'm falling for this kind of people over and over again. I feel guilty for not seeing the red flags, I feel guilty for not doing enough when I noticed the red flags blaming myself for the mess in my life and not being able to do much at the moment 😔 but one day I will rise again, hopefully for good this time.

  • @pinkpaisley4520
    @pinkpaisley4520 Рік тому +5

    Darren you are SPOT ON!
    Everything you have mentioned is my daughters Ex partner to a tee!
    The only problem is she has a child to him and so she has to remain in contact with him and he is still trying to constantly sabotage her and has obviously been planning his attack for along time and has set her up and gas lighted her during times of arguments when she would try and call him out and then he has recorded her during those times and then used it against her - even to police - but he would NEVER record the gas lighting that built up to the argument so it always looked like she was the unstable one and he was the victim!
    These people are PURE EVIL!

  • @jeffreyjackson5229
    @jeffreyjackson5229 Рік тому +2

    "And if they are suffering, they will demand that others are suffering as well"- Wow!

  • @wilsonle61
    @wilsonle61 Рік тому +4

    It was really disorienting to just be talking normally (or so I thought) to my old boss and he would just explode in a rage like he wanted to kill you.

  • @prant8998
    @prant8998 Рік тому +2

    It’s soul deadening walking on eggshells. Living under the shadow of a volcano. The frustrating thing is that there was no actual trigger for the tantrums, they could happened on a vacation, a waitress pouring a cup of coffee at the wrong time. She, suddenly got up from the table and said, “I’m leaving!” She went to our room and packed her bag crying and upset. (I did talk her out of it.) The point is, I has zero control over these tantrums, I tried to never upset her, but she could spontaneously get angry over literally nothing. It wears on you, physically and mentally. She, had so many wonderful qualities, yet flawed in such a distractive way.

  • @kitsmith693
    @kitsmith693 Рік тому +3

    Frank Yoeman described narcissists he said that “reality is an aggression” the grandiosity must me maintained by rage & contempt

  • @raymondgross6419
    @raymondgross6419 2 роки тому +13

    Thank you

  • @imnoel8214
    @imnoel8214 Рік тому +5

    I've seen an "eye flash" in several acquaintances who I've pegged as narcissistic. You'll say something in casual conversation that they didn't suggest first, or something you know that they didn't, or maybe you'll be doing something like moving furniture that reveals how you've been doing strength training. They will take offense, but because there is an audience, or because they know blowing up is not a good look, they will reign in their outburst. But just for a moment, their eyes widen and their pupils dilate.

  • @DennisNowland
    @DennisNowland 2 роки тому +12

    Just an aside. When it comes to narcissists, when you are in the presence, just take a step back and observe the crap that comes out of their minds and realise how messed up their brain must be. Then what? If you can, just walk away.

    • @SarahBW2893
      @SarahBW2893 Рік тому +1

      After years of excruciating work, I have finally stopped freezing (and weeping) in the face of this behavior. Now, I can start to observe it in fascination and awe at how deranged it is. It’s really amazing.

    • @konkylie-3000
      @konkylie-3000 3 місяці тому

      Difficult when fear overpowers and numb you.

  • @elainehawthorne6143
    @elainehawthorne6143 2 роки тому +5

    Thx you Darren, as always,
    Your reassuring guidance
    ticks all the boxes ✔️✔️✔️
    💖💖🙏🏻💖💖

  • @mirola73
    @mirola73 Рік тому +4

    Yep, that's pretty much my partner the last week, have just discovered (more so I have accepted I guess) the fact she's a narcissist.
    Have suspected it for years, but still was 'under the spell', not anymore now.
    She's livid, has been stonewalling me for a week (for something she has done of course and I nearly crucified her for, I just had enough, had come to the end of my ability to take her punches).
    Not feeding her anymore and she's running all over the place to get emotions from others, the kids, others outside the house etc. is not hanging out with me, something she always used to do.
    She even left for a hotel in another city with a friend yesterday, never told me of course, the kids told me she was gone (again).
    The escalations are just ridiculous and I'm expecting many more to come.
    Seeing professional help for me very soon finding out various.
    With all this craziness I'm quite content she's not in the house to wreak havoc, I sleep much better and don't feel stressed at all, feels like I've partially switched off from hers well.
    When the moment comes that we will talk I 100% want professional help, if she's not going for it I'm out, 22 years marriage down the drain.
    If that happens I know divorce isn't down to me, I have tried, these people cannot be changed without therapy and even then.............

  • @JohnSmith-wo7ns
    @JohnSmith-wo7ns 2 роки тому +14

    I was on the wrong end of this rage more than once and received slaps to the face.

    • @Utaker935
      @Utaker935 Рік тому +3

      Been there done that. Then you get told it did not happen or you don’t recall it correctly. Bruised and cracked ribs with a foot mark does not even class as evidence. I was told that I fell over and that did it.

    • @JohnSmith-wo7ns
      @JohnSmith-wo7ns Рік тому +1

      @@Utaker935 her own teenage daughter witnessed the whole thing and shouted at her, the ex still didn't think she'd done wrong.

  • @ninjagirlnomeansno9403
    @ninjagirlnomeansno9403 2 роки тому +9

    Absolutely stupendous, Thank you so much for this Darren, Peace, love to you and everyone, Thank you universe 🌈👁👽🌌🛸♾️🧝‍♀️😃✨️🦄🐉🧿💞😁

  • @harmonizedigital.
    @harmonizedigital. Рік тому +3

    One time my father threaten to knock my teeth out when I was seven years old because we had a disagreement over soccer. He was yelling like person in the nut hut.

  • @sandie683
    @sandie683 Рік тому +4

    I never knew about this sickness, my ex boyfriend since August shocked me so much. We were at Harrods and he wanted an expensive jacket, I had bought him something a day back. Am older and make more money. I told him I could'nt anymore. He asked for me to help him for a deposit for a home as he knew I had just sold my small flat. But I told him I need the funds for my business. He got into a huge rage, and yelled out loud at the food hall to everyone "Hey, this woman is a pediphile who raped me!" I have never been so embarassed and shocked in my life. What anger he had!

  • @jesperandersson889
    @jesperandersson889 2 роки тому +4

    grand gala, champagne anyone+ thanks for a wonderful wonderful work at you best - spannxxx!

  • @cassiebennet4262
    @cassiebennet4262 Рік тому +3

    Someone may not even be critisizing them at all but they will view it as criticism because their paranoia makes them believe everyone is judging them.

  • @ClaireEverest
    @ClaireEverest Рік тому +2

    Struggling coparent with a narcissist 😢

  • @sinjinmonsoon9055
    @sinjinmonsoon9055 Рік тому +4

    My narc sister is a cop and calls 911 on me all the time. She knows exactly what to say and they come every time. 3xs now.

  • @LisaCulton
    @LisaCulton Рік тому +3

    They pretend to be listening and having an adult conversation or discussion, but meanwhile they're clenching their fists and jaws and you can see their neck veins bulging because it's so hard for them to control their rage and disdain towards the other person. I started asking "do you want to hit me, because you're making a fist?" Then, they would unclench the fist(s) and pretend that I didn't say that.

  • @ladyvirgo013
    @ladyvirgo013 Рік тому +2

    Ya, my husband of 12 years withdrew, devalued me and then discarded me within 2 months

  • @paulbaker4941
    @paulbaker4941 Рік тому

    I love the way this guy smirks. Well done

  • @jocelyndambrosio7794
    @jocelyndambrosio7794 2 роки тому +2

    Brilliant! I love learning from this channel!❤

  • @user-zy8gk2nn7d
    @user-zy8gk2nn7d Рік тому +4

    psycho rage can be stopped only by exposing them (videotaping the rage and putting online) or fear ( they are scared of somebodys's pysical adventage or police). I have noticed one psychopath at my workplace -filled with hate towards me - "stopped hating me" when I quit my job. Than he behaved "normally" - what has happend with this whole hate towards me?. Being in control, having a potenital target enrages the more and their hate grows.

  • @frankG335
    @frankG335 7 місяців тому +2

    We see this in a certain country, where a politician may behave this way and with cult leaders who get people to follow them, but end up destroying those very people.

    • @Cornusnuttallii
      @Cornusnuttallii 2 місяці тому

      Sorry, didn't get to the end of your comment, but it rprobably doesn't belong here.

  • @isobelle.London
    @isobelle.London 2 роки тому +14

    Can a person with NPD have temporary psychosis ?

    • @lisbethbird8268
      @lisbethbird8268 2 роки тому +8

      Anyone can, but yes. On one of the Borderline Notes video Dr. Frank Yeomans said he sees this as a common facet of npd... he's treated many.

    • @chrismarley3536
      @chrismarley3536 2 роки тому +5

      @@lisbethbird8268 TY 4 answering this question. I did not know how to reply as the narcissist I deal with in my life (business relationship I can't back out of immediately) ...cont'd...the NPD I must see seems to frequently be in their own world & it's not the same one the rest of humanity resides in

    • @taraarrington2285
      @taraarrington2285 2 роки тому +8

      Yes my narcissistic borderline mother believes things that are not true and my family has a shared psychosis with her I mean that's what happens when you're the scapegoat in a narcissistic family everybody believes that they're good and you're bad when I'm starting to understand that that's the complete opposite of the truth.

    • @isobelle.London
      @isobelle.London 2 роки тому +4

      I’m so glad to hear others had similar experiences my nex would say and behave in very delusional ways I genuinely believe he had some type of temporary psychosis he literally built worlds off his emotions and acted as if there real it was scary one of the worst experiences. I’ve asked a few times and I’ve been told there can be some type of temporary psychosis with NPD . It’s reassuring

    • @edgreen8140
      @edgreen8140 2 роки тому +4

      Yep, psychotic events occur.

  • @jeffreyjackson5229
    @jeffreyjackson5229 Рік тому

    Your gift point reminded me of an experience with my mother. This was years before I went no contact.
    One year I sent her a birthday card with $100.00 inside. Upon receipt she immediately called me and was so excited.
    So the next year, I experimented to see her reaction. I sent a birthday card but with no money. I didn't hear from her. Approximately three days later, I called for another purpose, and during the conversation, she mentioned that she received the card. I didn't ask if she had. And when she said that she had received it, it was done so as if in passing.
    That told me a lot.

  • @claireh.7605
    @claireh.7605 7 місяців тому

    Coffee and sleeping while listening to UA-cam in my phone make me wake up with narcissistic psychosis and rage! Not doing both and going to a gym for any exercise turns me into a normal cal person.

  • @realitywinner7582
    @realitywinner7582 Рік тому +3

    making out the victim has destroyed their lives .

  • @dodgerstone
    @dodgerstone 2 роки тому +11

    What About Narcissistic Amnesia?
    Is it Real?
    Do They Honestly Erase Their Bad Behaviors in Their Mind?
    Or is Just More Lying--Saying They Have No Idea What Your is Talking About...
    ??? Has Anyone Got the Answer?

    • @DarrenFMagee
      @DarrenFMagee  2 роки тому +7

      I made a video about toxic amnesia if you’d find that interesting?

    • @ellenfarmer3498
      @ellenfarmer3498 2 роки тому

      Yep, with a narc mom, she at least admitted to me when I was younger that she was egotistical, but I didn't understand that term, she didn't bother to explain. My older sis is scary narc, horrible manipilations, rage on every on for decades, but always denied, forgot her 'episodes'. No contact since 2020 after her rage on me for percieved things I said to her 50 years ago, we were kids! The grudges these types withhold, release as rage is just mind bending.

    • @travelwell6049
      @travelwell6049 Рік тому +1

      We have noticed with my Dad that his brain will literally rewrite events in his memory in order to protect the belief that he is perfect and does no wrong.
      For example, when I was ill he didn’t take me to the hospital. After about 5 days my Mum got a family friend to take me to the hospital where we were told I could have died if it had been left longer. His memory of that whole thing is that he took me to the hospital just in the right time. After he loses an argument, he will later tell the story from the opposing point of view, and he seems to genuinely believe the whole conversation completely differently.
      Defence mechanism to protect the grandiose belief of superiority.

    • @SarahBW2893
      @SarahBW2893 Рік тому

      @Berlinetta ____ yes! The trance thing! I feel like they’re out of body, no control, like a fugue state. But I think you’re right. They know. Afterward, they know what they did, deep inside.

  • @toddlippincott2070
    @toddlippincott2070 Рік тому +1

    my ex had ALL 10 SIGNS... unbelievable

  • @justChrisjones
    @justChrisjones Рік тому +1

    My narcissists seem to be more callculated. Unless they were drunk.

  • @michelevanlimburgh-lu9wc
    @michelevanlimburgh-lu9wc Рік тому

    Sometimes the anger can come out in a single word as a result of when the narcissist has been discovered. True, the victim is a vulnerable target.

  • @AnonAnon1
    @AnonAnon1 2 роки тому +7

    Could theft or denying someone access to their rightful property be an indicator of narcissistic rage? The narc would have to be close enough to you to have access to your belongings, maybe even secretly copying keys to gain access to your home whilst your out. once the heist is complete their alibi- you can’t prove it was me! But they’re laughing at you on the inside.

    • @prettyevil6662000
      @prettyevil6662000 Рік тому +1

      That's not rage. That's just violating personal boundaries (to the extent of illegal activity it sounds like), gaslighting and manipulation. These are normal narcissist behaviors that have nothing to do with rage.
      Get a security camera pointed at your door if you believe someone is entering and exiting your home without your permission and/or taking your things.

  • @SarahBW2893
    @SarahBW2893 Рік тому +3

    Do you think these rages are dissociative episodes? It often seems that way to me, like they’re not in control of themselves at all and almost don’t even respond to anything, out of their bodies. Maybe this is wishful thinking on my part, so I don’t have to feel the pain of knowing they’re intentionally hurting me.

  • @petershaw2566
    @petershaw2566 Рік тому +2

    A compliment re foregoing her morning take away coffee to save for an approaching Xmas present for her son; she deemed this as a criticism of her to indicate she was bad at budgeting for a present and being forced to scrimp and save belatedly.
    She doubled up as if I had punched her solar plexus let out a loud ooooohhhh and walked away!
    A few days later I attempted to redeem the situation
    (At that time I was not aware of NPD folk and their woeful symptoms)
    I offered to teach her young son high school mathematics.
    She shouted at me she had engineering mathematics turned her, back walked away and never talked to me since but glaring when we passed!
    The second reaction was at perceiving my offer as me saying I knew more about maths than her!
    But she is superior at every thing!!!!
    NPD folk process input as either good or bad for them ie black or white and they reject anything the doesn't glorify or benefit them directly
    Yes! we should walk on egg shells when we communicate with NPD folk - they have the emotional control of a young child and similar thinking logic 😵‍💫

  • @Mkr7942
    @Mkr7942 Рік тому +1

    I think they can apologize, even if it is to make themselves look better.

  • @svitanok3891
    @svitanok3891 Рік тому +1

    It is healthier to say about our feelings rather than making statements about things as if the statements were the only truth on earth. imho

  • @randy_cbc8811
    @randy_cbc8811 7 місяців тому +1

    The Bible calls such inordinate rage, "fool's wrath", that is way, WAY out of proportion to the offense:
    "A stone is heavy, and the sand weighty; but a fool's wrath is heavier than them both" - Proverbs 27:3
    Stone is heavy and the sand weighty, But a fool’s [unreasonable] wrath is heavier and more burdensome than both of them. (Amplified Bible)

  • @suzannechurcher1745
    @suzannechurcher1745 7 місяців тому

    One small upset, perceived injustice and the whole pack of cards cones down.

  • @tammyfitzgerald5336
    @tammyfitzgerald5336 Рік тому +2

    When he told me about the 2000 women I ran lol

  • @catapfract
    @catapfract Рік тому

    Very good explanation

  • @tammyfitzgerald5336
    @tammyfitzgerald5336 Рік тому +1

    Caused my tummy to bleed almost killed
    Me
    From stress

  • @luffypupperstien2706
    @luffypupperstien2706 Рік тому +2

    I am wrong,wicked and evil because I bought my spouse a sign for their houseboat and put his name not the name of the boat.I'm guessing the rage comes from uncomfortable feelings based in his having took out a loan to buy it saying he needed a place to live because life with me is too horrible.

  • @Жестокий-Новый-Мир
    @Жестокий-Новый-Мир 7 місяців тому +2

    I never realized about this rage.... My biggest trouble of my life is the anger of my mother. She was angry as devil and was beating us (me and brother) like we Hitlers. Now i see what it is. Dad was a sailor man and he was more absent than present at home. When he was absent she could do with us whatever she wanted. My life began from beatings by my mother. That was that rage. I clearly believe it is demonic. No normal woman can hate their children like that. And for all other people she was a holy angel and she was telling to others lies about my dad and in fact he is an angel.

  • @sonderman8079
    @sonderman8079 8 місяців тому

    First time I was the subject of my wife's rage for no actual reason, but something I had done a few years back, it made me totally confused. Now, after 24 years of marriage and many such episodes, I have been the subject of total silent treatment (not a single word) for 4 years. Planning to get out soon as my son is just 18.

    • @EMichaelBall
      @EMichaelBall 2 місяці тому +1

      You might be dealing with a hormonal shift on her end due to menopause. Symptoms can include untoward mood changes.

  • @yellowsaffron7668
    @yellowsaffron7668 Місяць тому +1

    My nightmare. My neighbour who has physically and mentally abused me. They really are the devil. Evil beings.

  • @jeffreyjackson5229
    @jeffreyjackson5229 Рік тому

    No apology. Correct.

  • @gingerspeidel-ys6et
    @gingerspeidel-ys6et Рік тому

    My Dad would hit his children because the tv was too loud. Then he sit down and read the paper whistling and tapping his foot, happy as can be.

  • @jen2574
    @jen2574 Рік тому +1

    I wonder if a narcissist would ever have the self-knowledge to see this kind of video and say "that sounds like me!" I wonder what kind of reaction that any kind of an inkling of that would bring on.

    • @rudy2360
      @rudy2360 Рік тому +2

      I think that they do - but it is too threatening to acknowledge/confront. I believe life is 'grey' and it is difficult for all of us to confront out own demons - I see this in myself. I have found however, in a ridiculous way, that the rageful person projected this behavior on to me. This I know is not true as I am more of a fawner. It's just too much for someone to admit they are out of control and rageful as this triggers their abandonment issue. Not my circus - not my monkeys. I do not have, not am I or anyone else, required to endorse this rageful behavior because they cannot control it. Fortunately, I am not married to this person.

    • @cassiebennet4262
      @cassiebennet4262 Рік тому

      Most of them are incapable of self awareness. The very few who start to understand their disorder are plagued with toxic shame about it or they embrace it and love being nasty.

  • @deeboolove1301
    @deeboolove1301 2 роки тому +2

    THANKYOU. 👍💌🌈🙏😌🖼exactly .

  • @pollytheparrot8929
    @pollytheparrot8929 2 роки тому +3

    Yea, I can see that in my father.. He's got the narcissistic rage.. Once I just accidentally switched off the light switch, while he was doing something, he told me irritatingly to not off the light.. I didn't like the tone. So I just told him just that not to talk like that to me. For that, he got sooo angry and hyper, started talking shit like... Wat do u want me to do?? Hold ur legs!! U please leave the house and see things for urself! And telling mom.. If we had to depend on us financially, wat would have happened!! I was shocked 😲🙄.. Another time.. I wanted to talk to my mom,confront her with things.. He comes out of nowhere, comes in between.. Telling me not to talk to her, telling her health is not ok as an excuse.. I told him not to come in between us while I'm talking to her! Then he says d same thing, go ur way ie get of the house den suddenly gets angry, barges towards me... Pushes me, physically
    assaulted me..i was shocked jilted with this behavior!!! Dn mom comes in between takes him away from my room..i told him, how dare u touch me!? I just locked the door. I was sooo scared😔😞

    • @KY-jb4vd
      @KY-jb4vd Місяць тому

      this is a lot like the dynamics with my husband, sadly. esp with our oldest son. the same kind of stuff.. short temper, frustration, aggression at the drop of a hat, threats to kick out often and holding money over all of our heads. I'm sorry we have both had these kinds of experiences!!

  • @evanherzmann3686
    @evanherzmann3686 2 роки тому +1

    God bless You. Amen

  • @rosettesionne9139
    @rosettesionne9139 8 місяців тому

    Don't forget that most of the time they put the blame on their victims so that it is the victim who feel guilty and not them.

  • @Myjesus-1
    @Myjesus-1 Місяць тому +1

    Psalm 64
    Hear me, my God, as I voice my complaint; protect my life from the threat of the enemy. Hide me from the conspiracy of the wicked, from the plots of evildoers. They sharpen their tongues like swords and aim cruel words like deadly arrows. They shoot from ambush at the innocent; they shoot suddenly, without fear. They encourage each other in evil plans, they talk about hiding their snares; they say, "Who will see it?" They plot injustice and say, "We have devised a perfect plan!" Surely the human mind and heart are cunning.
    But God will shoot them with his arrows; they will suddenly be struck down. He will turn their own tongues against them and bring them to ruin; all who see them will shake their heads in scorn. All people will fear; they will proclaim the works of God and ponder what he has done. The righteous will rejoice in the Lord and take refuge in him; all the upright in heart will glory in him!

  • @susannay.3437
    @susannay.3437 2 роки тому +4

    What would be examples of sadism?

    • @DarrenFMagee
      @DarrenFMagee  2 роки тому +3

      I’ve made videos on sadistic personality, and videos on dark personality traits if you’d find those helpful?

    • @susannay.3437
      @susannay.3437 2 роки тому +1

      @@DarrenFMagee OK, thanks.

  • @Starsky1413
    @Starsky1413 9 місяців тому

    Thanks for this.
    I was accused by someone of doing something I did not do.
    My reaction brought home to me that I may have displayed narcissistic tendencies.
    I was very angry with the person for dragging my name through the mud due to career jealousy.
    I have corrected my behaviour in the meantime.
    I do feel however that I am a person that cannot stand unfairness…not only toward me as a person but unfairness towards andinnocent group of people or OTHER person.
    How should one react to these situations without carrying the narcissistic label.
    Is sticking up for the underdogs a case of narcissism?
    What if you give a person a chance to correct their behaviour because they show signs of bullying and general bad behaviour…would correcting that person at any means show a tendency to narcissism?
    I wonder about that?
    Am I a person that has recognises narcissists very quickly and I quickly put them on display….it may be so.
    I bring them down very quickly because I don’t entertain bullshit.

  • @Mina-vr1kw
    @Mina-vr1kw 4 місяці тому +1

    The ex just spent time for domestic violence aggravated assault-simple assault-terrorist threat- we are divorced so this was his new supply- sad. In the back of one’s mind you think could I have done better? Not with this disorder!!!!

  • @angelabrainky7786
    @angelabrainky7786 Рік тому

    Thank you.

  • @fairygurl9269
    @fairygurl9269 2 роки тому +3

    Can Have Something Slipped in Your Drink then Told You Drank too Much and Did Terribly Shameful things While Out of It.. only to Find Out Later it was Not True by others Account and or Surveillance Footage

  • @IceDogXena
    @IceDogXena Рік тому +1

    How can you distinguish between narcissistic rage and manic rage?

    • @tammyfitzgerald5336
      @tammyfitzgerald5336 Рік тому +1

      Called they f crazy dam 😢

    • @IceDogXena
      @IceDogXena Рік тому

      @@tammyfitzgerald5336 narcissist rage comes from a sense of entitlement, manic rage comes from a mood disorder.

  • @puntvandekomma9498
    @puntvandekomma9498 2 роки тому +1

    A lot of people see what they would like to see, especially in times likes this where people who act like victims will be petted. Most of the comments (if not all) are from people who feel like a victim....A lot of people also forget to judge themselfes.
    You mean well, it is informative and the knowledge is usefull......But iam Pretty sure a lot of people like to see their ex as a narcist so they don't have to blame themselfes....pretty sure most of these people are wrong with their judgement.
    Maybe i am a narcist yet if i cry with you guys i could be the dark empath.....Or maybe i am just hungry to give me a rage.....
    Mundus vult decipi, ergo decipiatur....

  • @markgallagher4720
    @markgallagher4720 4 місяці тому +1

    I understand what you are saying. Thats me. But put me on a medieval battlefield to defend your village I'll be there for you. But in these day, and ages, we are redundant. The people you used to rely on are somehow the bad people

    • @EMichaelBall
      @EMichaelBall 2 місяці тому +1

      You are always responsible for your actions.

  • @charmee4045
    @charmee4045 2 місяці тому +1

    I saw it once, demonic is the word that best describes it.........felt I was in the presence of pure evil and I was.

  • @tracygolwitzer9978
    @tracygolwitzer9978 Рік тому

    My step-daughter to a tee👍

  • @danieljohnson2349
    @danieljohnson2349 Рік тому

    DFM 👍

  • @jeffreyjackson5229
    @jeffreyjackson5229 Рік тому

    And the victim of the narcissistic abuse is the real narcissistic, I guess?🤣😅😂🤣

  • @tammyfitzgerald5336
    @tammyfitzgerald5336 Рік тому

    Lmao do a records check 😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮when you meet someone 🙌🙌💯🙏🏽🙌💯😈

  • @tammyfitzgerald5336
    @tammyfitzgerald5336 Рік тому +1

    Trumps cult a huge
    Mess 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @jayguardado6996
    @jayguardado6996 Рік тому +3

    U forgot the pitch black eyes they show

  • @CanadianBear47
    @CanadianBear47 2 роки тому +12

    Cruelty when u dont understand why when your needs are ignored and they r mad u even brought it up. When they r dumb and u say so. I c it I am capable and I am growing

  • @CanadianBear47
    @CanadianBear47 2 роки тому +10

    It's scary how many police are narcissistic tfw thinking of interactions with calgary AB police. Not safe

    • @uncleasshole3787
      @uncleasshole3787 Рік тому

      Slave lake Alberta cops aren't too bad, but there's always a bad apple in the bag...