DON’T LOSE SIGHT OF YOUR VALUE BY BEGGING SOMEONE ELSE TO SEE IT!

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  • Опубліковано 23 сер 2024
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 617

  • @ricekrissietreat
    @ricekrissietreat 4 роки тому +865

    Never beg, keep your crown on 👑 someone out there is praying for a person like you. Never settle

  • @HAROLD1131
    @HAROLD1131 4 роки тому +561

    Nobody is worth losing your dignity, value, or your self respect.
    Love yourself first!!!!

  • @brendabenjamin3752
    @brendabenjamin3752 4 роки тому +696

    The minute you stop giving goodies, then comes clarity. Put God first.

    • @sheenaroberson2771
      @sheenaroberson2771 4 роки тому +21

      Brenda this is Facts...

    • @happydays9613
      @happydays9613 4 роки тому +14

      Brenda Benjamin, 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿 for real.

    • @ChocolateMelanin
      @ChocolateMelanin 4 роки тому +13

      That right there 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

    • @KarJaneDavis
      @KarJaneDavis 4 роки тому +11

      SPREADING TRUTH 100%.

    • @rmb9210
      @rmb9210 4 роки тому +8

      Amen 🙏

  • @Khalifa1592
    @Khalifa1592 4 роки тому +87

    Life is short so don't waste it on someone who doesn't value you.

  • @tyrichart3372
    @tyrichart3372 4 роки тому +284

    This goes for those fake friendships too ladies!

  • @capricornwoman6726
    @capricornwoman6726 4 роки тому +468

    I finally had enough when I asked my bf to come hold me because my grandmother had just died in my car and I was traumatized...and he said can't your family (who were also grieving) hold you I've had a long day. I had been his shoulder to cry on when he experienced loss, his cheerleader... but didn't deserve the same??? Blocked him on everything... But it still hurts. 😢

    • @jessicafaith9755
      @jessicafaith9755 4 роки тому +71

      I don't know how long ago that happened to you, but I'm very sorry for your loss. I hope you've found a way to heal from it. 💚

    • @freedom768
      @freedom768 4 роки тому +28

      So very sorry for your grandmother passing, now your seeing your boyfriend at his value, think would your grandmother want someone too treat her beloved granddaughter in such away, rise above him knowing that your kindness focus on you at this time ,thank your boyfriend for showing you who he truly like then go grey rock on him ,grey rock works on these type of human beings, Dr Rami is online teaching about the narcissist behaviour, sending you love,rise this is your time be kind to yourself, wishing you all the very best in your future, you deserve the best ,granny would want her little granddaughter to have the best in her life..

    • @emmebee1168
      @emmebee1168 4 роки тому +44

      Damn, he sound like a narcissist? That's horrifying. I hope you have comfort elsewhere.

    • @feliciacarrington681
      @feliciacarrington681 4 роки тому +34

      Sister dont talk to him no morer,he probably a narcissist, they dont feel nothing,no heart,no soul.

    • @capricornwoman6726
      @capricornwoman6726 4 роки тому +57

      @@freedom768 thank you Queens! It's been almost a year and I haven't contacted him...But I'm still not dating... Healing myself so I don't make the same mistake again.🙏

  • @UrbanFlamingo
    @UrbanFlamingo 4 роки тому +250

    You teach people how to treat you by what you do and don’t accept. Treat me worse than I’m treating you and I’ll hand you your walking papers. Life is too short!

    • @tennillegenise8968
      @tennillegenise8968 4 роки тому +13

      I Agree I'm in a place in my Iife where if you don't or can't see the value in me it's okay God has shown & taught me who I am and I am special and Loved that's all that matters to me .👌🏾💯💗

    • @thatchica08
      @thatchica08 4 роки тому +3

      💯

    • @1SavageQueen89
      @1SavageQueen89 3 роки тому

      Bet!!!

    • @TheGreatestMajesty
      @TheGreatestMajesty 3 роки тому

      "Treat me worst than I'm treating you" 😳

  • @jasminearcher7241
    @jasminearcher7241 4 роки тому +121

    Narcissist are the worst they will smile at you I cried and he laughed at my pain

    • @sarahcorasmin5624
      @sarahcorasmin5624 4 роки тому +17

      Are you serious these sound like insecure man extremely insecure men. The funny part they wouldn't accept that from women .... Smh this is shameful

    • @chynadoll77cyn59
      @chynadoll77cyn59 4 роки тому +4

      Yep smh 🤦🏾‍♀️

    • @alizeetaylor847
      @alizeetaylor847 4 роки тому

      Jasmine Archer : I got sick and needed to go to hospital he wanted to me to any place since I complained to where my records were that was the worst feeling. He’d get sick treated him like a KING smh

    • @Daraax
      @Daraax 3 роки тому +2

      They are the weakest people

    • @persistentlydriven9390
      @persistentlydriven9390 3 роки тому +2

      How about now ??? 😆😆😆

  • @alizeetaylor847
    @alizeetaylor847 4 роки тому +182

    You hit on the NOSE 👃. After five years. I was devalued, disregard, disrespected. I was blamed for everything, even thing’s I didn’t say or do. It was hard I went 💯 NO CONTACT... Putting God first. Let Go & Let God knowing your Worth is the BEST.

  • @sheasavage2496
    @sheasavage2496 3 роки тому +16

    Meanwhile he didn’t see his wife’s value. Smmfh.

  • @constancereynolds3110
    @constancereynolds3110 4 роки тому +77

    To ME if you don't know your worth before you get into a relationship you will settle, tolerate and endure whatever dysfunction that relationship has.

  • @mitzilou9560
    @mitzilou9560 4 роки тому +127

    Being with someone who can't see their impact on the relationship and how they affect others is a sign of someone who probably won't take accountability. My ex-fiance doesn't want to dwell into any negative including our problems that needed to be solved and told me to deal with it on my own. He chose to see the world through rose-colored glasses and not the real world that it is, and that's so dismissive and toxic positivity. Sometimes if it's out of your hands, it deserves freedom from your mind too. Let it go. Let him go. God will give you strength and courage to move forward, He alone can and will heal you. I learned to not accept good when great is around the corner. Temporary distraction vs long term satisfaction, now let's choose wisely.

    • @misse1228
      @misse1228 4 роки тому +4

      Yes.
      I remember early on in my "relationship" with my "ex", I tried to get him to understand and agree that (his) actions and words have an effect on other people. He didn't care, and he said that people choose to feel a certain way, and it's not his problem.

    • @mitzilou9560
      @mitzilou9560 4 роки тому +1

      @@misse1228 That is so selfish and immature, that closed to any improvement mindset. I mean for sure we could've addressed things better but my ex also made it clear to me that he is not a work in progress. We truly deserved better than that.

    • @mitzilou9560
      @mitzilou9560 4 роки тому +1

      @A step ahead I got that from Tori Masters. Check her out! She spills truth! 💛

    • @saradavis9137
      @saradavis9137 3 роки тому

      So true👏👏👏

    • @Dia_Hunny_Boo
      @Dia_Hunny_Boo 3 роки тому +1

      😞 he’s about to be my EX-fiancé too. Same situation.

  • @omnihuntress208128
    @omnihuntress208128 4 роки тому +62

    Each and every narcissist that I have known in my life ALWAYS REAP WHAT THEY SOW...

    • @saedaissa5949
      @saedaissa5949 4 роки тому +6

      Do they ever?😔😣😔😒

    • @chynadoll77cyn59
      @chynadoll77cyn59 4 роки тому +2

      Saeda Issa right same thing I’m wondering they from new supply to new supply.

    • @deja_
      @deja_ 4 роки тому +4

      Eh, sometimes they really do not. Most of the time, when bad things happen to them or don't go the way they planned they pass the buck off onto someone else. Their "karma" is never their doing and since it's not their fault they do not dwell much on it. They've learned nothing and there is no catharsis. Some people really just don't have the capacity to care

    • @iraidushka
      @iraidushka 3 роки тому +1

      Correct! Them jumping endlessly from one supply to another over and again, year after year is them never finding any peace within themselves. We may think they never reap what they saw, but their inability to commit and stay in a healthy happy relationship for a prolonged period of time is a testament of reaping what they are sawing.

    • @omnihuntress208128
      @omnihuntress208128 3 роки тому +1

      @@iraidushka as far as my concern my DM will reap heavily what he has sow... Especially my DM because he played the same game for an entire year...

  • @bigflyness17
    @bigflyness17 4 роки тому +335

    I’ve currently struggled with this.... but no more. I struggled to block this person..but I did and not looking back... this video is confirmation and I’m going to fight for me again! Thanx Derrick.. may GOD continue to bless & use you.

    • @welcometotheeroom
      @welcometotheeroom 4 роки тому +4

      Me too sis and we ain't turning back!

    • @pinkoptics3
      @pinkoptics3 4 роки тому +6

      Same. I ended up changing my whole phone number. I was tired.

    • @mskeysnote14
      @mskeysnote14 4 роки тому +13

      The real test is maintaining your phone number and having the mental capacity to stop entertaining them. I got tired of changing my number and worked on blocking them mentally.
      Trust me: that is the one that breaks you away completely.

    • @taga8006
      @taga8006 4 роки тому +4

      Sending you love and healing vibes 🙏💞

    • @MiekaFastingWeightLoss
      @MiekaFastingWeightLoss 4 роки тому +3

      Smart move! You are strong❤️

  • @MzRite
    @MzRite 4 роки тому +129

    It took me a long time to understand what this really mean. I am 47 years old and just recently I learned what it means for a man to truly value you and love you for you. He has got to be all in this the same way you are or it's just not gonna work. And consistency is very important also with loving unconditionally. Don't settle for less cause he will only do as much as you allow him to do. Know your worth at all cost.....

    • @mandyg5747
      @mandyg5747 4 роки тому +9

      Me too...happily after 56 years, he finally found me!

    • @MzRite
      @MzRite 4 роки тому +7

      @Elizabeth Noir Let me make this clear. If you allow a man to come in a relationship with you and you don't expect him to pay his way, guess what he's gonna be in Your bed while you getting up everyday to go to work while he doesn't bring anything to the table. That's what I am talking about. If you will allow stuff like that to go on you will allow for anything to go on. I know a man will do what he please but it's up to you if you want to stay in that or leave....

  • @CurvyThickFitTV
    @CurvyThickFitTV 4 роки тому +169

    That’s powerful right there - “it’s on purpose, they want you to be convinced that the good in you ain’t good at all, or can be easily replaced. They want you to believe that the things that are heavy in your heart, really ain’t worth regarding as seriously or even listening to...”
    Ladies please listen and please please PLEASE know your worth. I feel like ppl that use these manipulative gaslighting tactics aren’t just toxic but they’re highly flammable and only wanna set you on fire to make themselves feel useful and worthy.
    Focus on yourself and healing Bc the right one will come find you and hear your silence and feel your absence.
    They will do everything not to experience either one and they will do whatever to make sure they’re adding to your happiness - Bc they immediately know that you’re worth it.
    You won’t have to prove a thing. ❤️❤️

    • @jenniferj6580
      @jenniferj6580 4 роки тому +10

      Say it again Jackson for the sisters in the back!

    • @dlwsport250
      @dlwsport250 4 роки тому +10

      Flammable! Excellent phrasing!

    • @karencrawford7696
      @karencrawford7696 4 роки тому +6

      They just don't care

    • @KeegiiBaby
      @KeegiiBaby 4 роки тому +5

      I felt this♥️ hard

    • @snooty4180
      @snooty4180 4 роки тому +8

      Sadistic is what they are and it’s real.

  • @sadetucker2094
    @sadetucker2094 4 роки тому +110

    I've allowed myself to go through a few toxic relationships that I knew good and well was nothing like what I deserved. The crazy thing is that I knew these relationships weren't what I wanted, but because I was so low at one point, I had a bad habit of believing that I didn't deserve any happiness. I felt I deserved all of the bad things I encountered, until my recent relationship made me wake the hell up. What separated this wake up calling from the rest of the relationships was that I had gotten older, so I began to think of myself differently without realizing. I was begging for affection, time, communication, and even got to a place where I started to become very angry, which is nothing like me. I finally looked at my own self from the outside. I started self evaluating, and for the first time in a long time, I didn't like that I was becoming bitter, angry, and depressed. Although me and this person will forever be tied together since we share a child, I've managed to start mentally regaining my self respect, self esteem, and setting boundaries. Once you set boundaries and demand respect, and once you start to truly value yourself, you never want to go back to toxic habits.

    • @inesmrtnz7501
      @inesmrtnz7501 4 роки тому +6

      Thank you for your words😍 I’m scared, well this is happening to me right now..., the part where you give , give, give actually are begging for a lot of things you don’t need and then become bitter because one can’t be doing the things they love and so on...,🙌🏽😘

    • @happydays9613
      @happydays9613 4 роки тому +5

      @@inesmrtnz7501 I hope you find the courage to walk away and find better as you can do better for yourself worth. No one in a relationship should feel like this or tolerate this.

    • @melmel4029
      @melmel4029 4 роки тому +10

      I know just what you mean! Did 15years and share 3 children!! I never imagined myself away from what i thought was my other half. Your rite tho, as you grow you start thinking wiser, wanting better, and understanding what the true meaning of love actually means. Your not able to see it, taste it, or smell it all the time, but what it does allow you to do is feel!! Im thankful to have gone thru the drama that i had. Without it, i wouldn't be as confident as i'am now, to stand up to the bullshit, regardless what direction its coming from! That can include from family, haters( in the streets or work feild), the community, the school district, government/ law enforcement!! There is a time for everything, and my time is now!! Never know when your going to take your last breath..so I'ma save mine for when its needed! Can't waist it waiting for somebody to love you better then you can, never gonna happen!! Proud of anyone who has decided to put their safety, wellbeing, sanity and happiness at the top of their priority list😊. Keep striving and thriving yall..it's all going to be worth it in the end!💪💪💪

    • @maggykadogo3473
      @maggykadogo3473 4 роки тому +2

      Wow this what am going through😢

    • @sadetucker2094
      @sadetucker2094 4 роки тому +4

      @@maggykadogo3473 You're stronger than you think. Once you're truly tired of someone doing you wrong, you start to put your foot down. When you still tolerate disrespect, you aren't tired because you're allowing it. I hope that you find the strength to start putting yourself first again. You have to understand that while you may think that person is gonna eventually change, it's sadly not true. Trust me, I kept telling myself that over and over.

  • @blessingokpo5089
    @blessingokpo5089 4 роки тому +49

    Been there. Disrespected and devalued. Even open his mouth to say it. One thing am very sure of is that God is always going to be bigger than a man. That's for sure.

  • @toombs6287
    @toombs6287 4 роки тому +163

    Know your worth ladies.....💯❤️

  • @linrey3397
    @linrey3397 4 роки тому +31

    Never give your heart fully. Keep that part of it for yourself. Love yourself first and you'll find that no matter how bad it hurts it makes it a little bit easier to move on and heal.

  • @cleftheart1969
    @cleftheart1969 4 роки тому +58

    I dealt with someone like that he just wanted me to put up with his pain over childhood and didn't want to overcome it. AND never wanted to fix his current problems. Just wanted to bitch about them and expecting me to take his excuses. And when l wouldn't take it... he pulled away. I was demanding too much for him to be a man SMDH

    • @cleftheart1969
      @cleftheart1969 4 роки тому +4

      @Diane sotelo to answer your questions.... he lost his dad at a young age. His mom was controlling and abusive. He was still allowing his to control him. And he was 28 at the time. He would bitch and complain how controlling his mom and I told stop letting her control him.... he allowed her to bully him into co signing for his sister's college funds thankfully he didn't qualify. I was outraged l told he is grown he's not a boy anymore, AND that is sister is not his responsibility ect.... He blamed his mom for the way he is not knowing or teaching him about finances ect.... so when I tried to.... he didn't want to listen and learn. Plus he complained about his weight but didn't want to work out ect... since it was hard work. He wanted me to be a mother nurturer and cottle him because he had a hard childhood witch he always bitched about. And he did nothing but take take take, never brought nothing to the relationship. Yes we were both not ready to be in a relationship but at least I tried. All he did was play video games from dawn to dusk at if l wasn't in the picture. I was too done. Hope that answered your question.

    • @cleftheart1969
      @cleftheart1969 4 роки тому +2

      @Diane sotelo he did move out and stayed with me for a minute but he still didn't want to grow up. .. ect so l had to cut him lose. SMDH

    • @cleftheart1969
      @cleftheart1969 4 роки тому +2

      @A step ahead EXACTLY that's what he did, it was the world's fault not his. Instead of owning up to his wrong doing it was my fault SMDH

  • @unlockyourstars
    @unlockyourstars 4 роки тому +35

    Unfortunately, I know exactly what it feels like to be devalued by a narcissist emotionally. The best defense is to remember who you are and don't let anybody dim your shine in your mind. Know your own self worth and always be prepared to turn your back and walk away from anyone who tries to minimize you or your value. Their opinion is simply that and it is not a true reflection of you, or who you are, or your value as an individual who deserves to be treated better than the one who does this to you.

  • @taniarivera8082
    @taniarivera8082 4 роки тому +94

    Really needed to see this video just broke up with my boyfriend who I been with for 6 years. Always trying to make him see my worth but I need to see my worth inorder for others to see it. So glad I saw this video you never disappoint Derrick Jaxn

    • @lashontaylor2078
      @lashontaylor2078 4 роки тому +2

      SELF LOVE BEFORE ANY LOVE OUTSIDE OF THE CREATOR!

  • @wezi06
    @wezi06 4 роки тому +4

    1 year of no contact with ex narcissist. When I tried to communicate my feelings of how I felt about certain situations he found a way to make me feel worthless. Justify his wrong doings by blaming me. Like I put a gun to his head and told him to do it. I look back and it’s a lot of red flags that I ignored. When I left he acted like the victim when it was the other way around. Unfortunately we coparent...I just strictly keep it about the child. I only text...he refuses to text always wants to call...I just let it ring to voicemail. If you have to make a choice between your mental stability and happiness than be a relationship please choose you. It’s all best that your child has one stable parent versus being raised in a toxic house hold for the sake of having two parents.
    Be blessed!

  • @lesclaus6170
    @lesclaus6170 4 роки тому +7

    Derrick you’re such a good looking hunk of man . I can’t believe I come to you for relationship advice . I’m a 77 year old white woman. You give good advice . I want you to know , a person is never to old to want and need good advice . Race has nothing to do with our ability to love and receive love . Thank you .

  • @kimmieann316
    @kimmieann316 3 роки тому +2

    Never beg anybody...its time to walk away if you feel you have to beg somebody for love.

  • @stephanierojas3709
    @stephanierojas3709 4 роки тому +19

    Period! Know your worth ladies you’re valuable you are worth it. Remember you’re a diamond 💎

  • @moonlightstargem1006
    @moonlightstargem1006 4 роки тому +15

    whenever i feel the toxicity or i feel uncomfortable or feel like crap because of this person i promise God and myself i will back away and avoid that person forever and all together. thank you! Your video made a total difference in my life now. i had to grow up to understand this

  • @linzg9680
    @linzg9680 4 роки тому +2

    I'm going through a messy break up right now and have no one to talk to. Have no family or friends so I genuinely appreciate you uploading this it's what I need to hear. Thank you

    • @jocielynn3605
      @jocielynn3605 4 роки тому

      Hang in there I know exactly how that feels..God Bless

  • @kcd3323
    @kcd3323 4 роки тому +75

    I think u were on 3 way with my future ex!!! I swear I LITERALLY just had this conversation. This was FOR ME!!! I SWEAR!!!!

    • @ellachallas
      @ellachallas 4 роки тому +1

      Yassss!!! This is for you 💫. Stay strong queen!!!

    • @kcd3323
      @kcd3323 4 роки тому +1

      @@ellachallas u too!!! Ty!

    • @ellachallas
      @ellachallas 4 роки тому +8

      @@eddiethomasville3124 🤦🏼‍♀️Spoken like a person who has never been responsible for another human being, but thinks they know what constitutes good parenting. Good luck with finding a quality female to put up with all of that bullshit you're spewing. I truly hope you level up before you try to bring another down.✌🏼💛🙏

    • @Diana-bw4ol
      @Diana-bw4ol 4 роки тому

      Same

    • @trafficcontrol2420
      @trafficcontrol2420 4 роки тому +2

      Future ex lol.

  • @beaube1640
    @beaube1640 4 роки тому +7

    You’re right...When you value your worth you don’t stay you leave because the person you’re with apparently doesn’t see his or respects his worth or yours. If you don’t leave you’ll be blamed for reacting to his actions.. it’s best to walk away.

  • @marieowens4943
    @marieowens4943 4 роки тому +7

    LOVE YOURSELF FIRST!!! If your partner doesn't see it, then that's someone you DON'T need in your life. Walking away is easier said than done, but once it's all said and done, things will become sooo much clearer and fall into place.

    • @octaviaserban9760
      @octaviaserban9760 4 роки тому +1

      You said it, girl! Right on point!
      Yet I do not understand how there can be soulless people, who claim to be something that does not exist, actors in their lives and the lives of others?
      How can there be people who live with someone to feed on the suffering they cause?
      To me it's just sick and completely fake👎

  • @victorialevy431
    @victorialevy431 4 роки тому +3

    Get the hell out! If the fool does value you, respect you or love you - leave. Time is valuable. Don't waste your time. It's easier to be alone and make yourself happy than try to make someone happy who doesn't love you and is never satisfied with a damn thing you do. I've been divorced twice and widowed once. I'm 58 and I wish I would have known about narcissistics before now. I didn't even know what they were. Don't get as old as I am to learn how to leave. God bless you always.

  • @imspecial2286
    @imspecial2286 4 роки тому +5

    Derrick you're absolutely right. Be true to yourself and don't let anyone define you nor allow them to live rent free inside your head. Ijs

  • @michelemonae8404
    @michelemonae8404 4 роки тому +14

    I went through this. I'm glad I found the light. This video helped even more.

  • @lisadeav73
    @lisadeav73 3 роки тому +2

    Damn, this video really hit home with me. For the last five years I've been a poor pitiful heartbroken, and vengeful for somebody who ripped my heart out. I've been stuck for 5 years. I can't move on , I can't go backwards. Frustrating. I love your videos , it's good to hear from a man's perspective.

  • @lauradieng3945
    @lauradieng3945 3 роки тому +1

    Wow. I'm tearing up... I feel crazy... feel like my feelings dont matter atball... yes he breaks me down over and over. Let's me cry, when he's hurt me, without feeling my pain or caring that I'm upset.

  • @tashawoods4656
    @tashawoods4656 4 роки тому +26

    Listening to::I am glad I walked away though it was the hardest thing to do everything you said I either did or dealt with..AS I CONTINUE TO HEAL AND GROW, YOU AND ALL THE RESOURCES YOU PROVIDE HAVE BEEN EXTREMELY HELPFUL AND I LOVE ME MORE AND MORE.

  • @brittanyr1456
    @brittanyr1456 4 роки тому +7

    Loved the way you wrapped it all up at the end!! 👏🏾.. Bring God into it. Ask him to divinely bring you your mate. But don’t ask for help and then interrupt his plans by doing what you want to do. You can’t ask him in and then step on his toes.

  • @honeygold1
    @honeygold1 4 роки тому +17

    On point, DerrickJaxn! But letting go of someone you've grown to Love (right or wrong) or have just become deeply attached to, is so much easier said than done! I'll keep listening with an open mind . . . and 🙏🏽 for the right thing to do. Keep keeping it 💯x💯!

    • @ruthreddick8369
      @ruthreddick8369 4 роки тому

      Letting go is a choice you need to make for your happiness and sanity! Healing from letting go will be tough, however, once you are healed, the feeling is amazing!! Believe in yourself, know your worth, all you do for him and the love you show him, give it to yourself!

    • @honeygold1
      @honeygold1 4 роки тому +1

      @Robin D. First of all, I was directing my comment to Derrick Jaxn, and I never stated he didn't love me. Your reply to my comment is Way too strong for someone who doesn't Know me, nor all the facts. Your reference to "stage left" implies that you see the world as a stage and we're mere actors playing roles. I live in in the Real World and I can Assure you that I'm a Real Woman, neither "weak" and certainly not "pathetic"! How dare you!! I'll keep an open mind nevertheless. God Bless. ❤✌🏽✊🏽

  • @joshmendez4675
    @joshmendez4675 4 роки тому +19

    I just wanna say you have helped me a lot watching your videos. You gave me the best advice and I’m glad I have moved on from that toxic relationship ❤️thank youuu

  • @TR-kr5vc
    @TR-kr5vc 4 роки тому +7

    Oh my goodness, you just described my relationship for the past 3 years. I am so exhausted and exactly how I feel. I appreciate coming across your video!!! Thank you ~

  • @ithompson88
    @ithompson88 4 роки тому +4

    I Just experienced this and when he went ghost i went silent...Growing up I didn’t know my value or worth because the women i was surrounded by were all weak so that’s what i became too..my life was a revolving door of toxic cycles but as I became stronger in Christ, Holy Spirit revealed my worth and so much more..yes the pain is temporary but God has shown me that I will have greater and i can move on and heal and everyone that I cut out my life will still be in the same f’kd up situations because they refuse to focus on themselves and heal so they blame US knowing deep down they ain’t shit🌼💛✨❤️💞💪🏾

  • @brittany5872
    @brittany5872 4 роки тому +26

    Omg this is so weird I needed this exactly rn ! 😭

  • @SonjaElizabethTeal
    @SonjaElizabethTeal 4 роки тому +1

    Relationships, Family, Friends, Jobs...
    ...this applies for so many situations.
    As hurtful as it was, I had to walk away from a close family member. I got tired of begging and they seemed to like to see me beg for their love and affection. I decided that I can't keep being around someone who doesn't value me. And I told them the same thing you said...
    "There are other people who actually want, value and love me and I'm no longer going to sit here and waste time messing with you!"

  • @vparris492
    @vparris492 4 роки тому +4

    Additionally, she has to figure out why she chose this person to share her life with and why she's staying with this particular person who posses narcissistic characteristics. The change she wants to see in him is the change she needs to work on within herself. Let him do his self healing on his own and go live your life free of the struggle. A relationship like that also begins to manifest itself in major unhealthy ways, like depression, anxiety, high blood pressure, eating disorders, etc.. Go get your blessings sis and take back your control!

  • @sarahsaylor9949
    @sarahsaylor9949 4 роки тому +4

    I love how real & straight you are. I truly needed to hear this. Thank you ❤

  • @eugeniaperry6145
    @eugeniaperry6145 4 роки тому +6

    Did you see the lil Wayne and 50 interview about black women. It just hurt that much more because of this racial war we in. We as block people truly don’t know our history like we should, we need a class. Because anytime a black man, talks so badly about a black woman at this time, or at anytime, but at this time. It’s just heart ❤️ breaking, and I hope you speak on it Derrick. God bless and god bless the world 🌎 🙏🏾.

  • @moonlightstargem1006
    @moonlightstargem1006 4 роки тому +6

    my dad and my brother have treated me this way growing up. and i know it's on purpose at this point because i am special. and because they know they are toxic and there is something of lesser value about THEM. and they wanted me to feel less special about myself. and yea my dad came from a narcissistic father himself.

    • @Isa45609
      @Isa45609 4 роки тому

      Same here, bless your soul 🙏🏻❤️

  • @traceycolvin0504
    @traceycolvin0504 4 роки тому +10

    Ladies!! The most important person in this world is: YOU!! No one can treat you better than YOU. Don't kick yourself in the balls also, I had to learn this too.

  • @j_l713
    @j_l713 4 роки тому +5

    💯 facts. I had to leave a 20 year relationship /marriage for the sake of my mental health

  • @ashley5430
    @ashley5430 4 роки тому +2

    Dear Lord!!!!! I’m so grateful I found your content. Can’t wait to get your book. Thank you!!!!! 🙌🏼🙏💕

  • @joycesanders9851
    @joycesanders9851 4 роки тому +13

    Oh my! This is were I have been for years and I am still there with my husband. But I’m coming out even if he has to put me to more shame. Again, I have got to come out. And I will!!

    • @ellachallas
      @ellachallas 4 роки тому

      Same! But, we got this. Learning and growing and loving ourselves sis!

    • @ricisutherland5562
      @ricisutherland5562 4 роки тому

      Me too 😒.

  • @godsdisciple4311
    @godsdisciple4311 4 роки тому +23

    Just what I need to hear, I know it!💛

  • @SV-hm7tg
    @SV-hm7tg 4 роки тому +16

    🙏🙏🙏 this video dropped at the right time 🙏🙏🙏

  • @giddies
    @giddies 4 роки тому +15

    I missed your contents. It’s been too long! Welcome back 🥰

  • @emiliejenkins9225
    @emiliejenkins9225 4 роки тому +8

    Just bought your book and i absolutely needed this so thank you so much for giving me hope that i am not a messed up case

  • @stephaniejoseph1470
    @stephaniejoseph1470 4 роки тому +1

    Thank you🙌i have been asking him to provide for hes daughter but he is constantly complaining that i complain a lot.He simply says i dont have money.I just feel he doesnt want.Everyday he doesnt want to do anything i ask.He simply complains more about how he is not receiving enough attention,love and physical appreciation

  • @rayraybutler2723
    @rayraybutler2723 3 роки тому +1

    Every time I get into my feelings I come to UA-cam to listen to you. I always feel better❤️ it’s hard as hell but I want to completely heal without running into something else. 💪🏽

  • @megvodrey
    @megvodrey 3 роки тому +1

    I felt such despair yesterday when my ex dropped off my things. Thank you for this! I’m so tired of giving all my love and getting nothing back. X

  • @Mayfloweralways
    @Mayfloweralways 4 роки тому +3

    I just wanted to bring this up. I was looking through different videos on UA-cam. And I read a comment where the woman said she felt very alone and and like she doesn’t get any support. And she said when she brings things to the guys attention, he doesn’t do anything. And a man jumped into it and said “have you ever thought the issue is you? A man can’t be your happiness. He can’t make you feel anything. You’re responsible for how you feel. He can’t fill a void you have. You have to fix yourself.” I was like....😲. All she was describing was neglect. Yes, she should leave, but to claim she wants man to be her entire happiness? How...do you blame a person for feeling lonely and neglected? And I have a long response, to which he told me “it’s about her own self love. No man can give her that.” Ok. You know what he give? He can give a damn!

    • @sarahcorasmin5624
      @sarahcorasmin5624 4 роки тому

      That's a bunch of crap I swear he does it to her. Because he doesn't love her ..... Trust me a narcassist will only be a narcassist when he knows he will get away with it especially if the other person is the nicer one.... That's part of their narcissitc behavior if the women loves herself has sense of confidence or self esteem his job is to completely destroy it .... But the person he truly loves he does not treat badly I promise. Its so sad

    • @Mayfloweralways
      @Mayfloweralways 4 роки тому +1

      Sarah Corasmin , exactly. I just got so upset. I think because I went through it. You love someone and you don’t want to give up on everything. And I was hurt that my ex didn’t do anything. He always said he would. The issue wasn’t that I wanted him to be my every happiness. I wanted him to be equally invested. It bothered me so much to see a man tell this woman that basically, she must have an empty life and was placing a burden on her partner to be her happiness 😠.

    • @sarahcorasmin5624
      @sarahcorasmin5624 4 роки тому

      Fuck that. He should be your everything I promise you if it was the other way around he would do the same thing. They will not settle a man already knows what he wants and it sounds like these are the type of men to real women on to see how far they can take it. I had a roommate try and pull the same trick lmao but joke,is on his cuz he's playing aroundcwith his girlfreind but has other women in his bed and women hesclayed up with smdh.

  • @favifabulous7106
    @favifabulous7106 4 роки тому +3

    Dammmm... this was my past relationship exactly. One of your best videos and thanks to you I left that relationship which took 2 years to leave and 4 years of on and off begging and 9 break ups. Thank you for validating my feeling and helping me leave ! Been nac..free almost 2 years

  • @angeliqueknox6917
    @angeliqueknox6917 4 роки тому +1

    I’ve been through that exact situation. It is very draining. It is sad that someone would do something like this to another person. Today, I am not exactly where I wanna be yet, but am grateful I’m not where I used to be! Thank you Derrick for letting God use you to help us🙏🏼❤️

  • @flyandshy00
    @flyandshy00 4 роки тому +1

    Men usually don't give what you need for you to leave them, because they already out but don't say it because they don't want to be seen a bad guy and if they leave - they can't go back as nothing happened.

  • @LadybugPhil413
    @LadybugPhil413 4 роки тому +1

    100%, spent years trying to work it out! Biggest waste of time in my life! Value yourself enough to move on, find the person looking for you! You deserve the love and relationship your heart desires. Never settle for less!!

  • @jamalwillabus6470
    @jamalwillabus6470 4 роки тому

    THE VINTAGE VEHICLE VIDEOS BY MY GUY WAS ALWAYS LIT! I BEEN a supporter since 2017

  • @shelby2131
    @shelby2131 4 роки тому +1

    Good God he is so fine, and emotionally intelligent along with mature? His girl better know how lucky she is and love this man perfectly because this whole package is so hard to come by. Smh

  • @wanstar1771
    @wanstar1771 2 роки тому

    Exactlyyyyy! High value, know your worth, add tax and NO discounts/sales!!! 💯🎯💋💄

  • @janieduran7882
    @janieduran7882 4 роки тому +6

    This is true just walk away thank you

  • @mama2the4thpwr88
    @mama2the4thpwr88 4 роки тому +3

    I swear you know exactly what to say 😔 This stuff ain’t no joke. I felt the whole video for real....

  • @asdf4678z
    @asdf4678z 3 роки тому

    Confusion is a sure sign to let it go. Having the same pointless conversations met with defensiveness, vagueness, or just avoiding answering the questions directly is just torture for YOU. The other person isn't interested in anything you have to say. Just tell them you're done. Walk away and don't look back no matter what they say. Those mind games will rule the relationship and you will end up feeling like you're 100 years old.

  • @Angelterron5
    @Angelterron5 4 роки тому +4

    Dealing with this now. It's like beating 2 dead horses.🌻🤯

  • @roxcbrown8821
    @roxcbrown8821 4 роки тому

    Numb to the way that they hurt others. Wow. Nailed it.

  • @melodydickens1023
    @melodydickens1023 4 роки тому +4

    Thank you so much for all the time that you put in and helping women like myself to get theirselves back your videos literally saved my life and help me to see the value in myself againI pray that God will bless you and cover you and keep you as you spread the word to women of how they are to be their best self

  • @erynbrock6584
    @erynbrock6584 4 роки тому +2

    This was so spot on! Love your words of wisdom. Everything resonated with me. I’ve seen the pattern too many times. Yes, I can only blame me. I have fallen for the love bomb stage too many times to count. And each time the devaluation starts quicker. And yes, it feels like he truly gets off on making me feel less. It gets worse every time. I have left him the last couple of times went no contact...then he truly makes me believe everything will change. But the emotional abuse gets worse and more painful every time. I have observed all of this and I know it’s hard to believe but I get stronger and more aware. It’s a lesson I’ve had to learn over and over apparently. I just hope more women wake up to this and stop it before it goes too far like I DID NOT DO. Thank you for your videos. I’m learning slowly but I AM learning. 🙏❤️

  • @martinamarina6688
    @martinamarina6688 4 роки тому

    I became so heart broken because I learned how broken I was as a person, how vulnerable I was and how my childhood trauma had me in bondage that I allowed myself to be a victim. Facing the bad and the ugly of my past and present took courage and humility. I am not responsible how he acted but I am responsible how I take that experience and turn it in to a positive by learning how to value myself and how to avoid a narcissistic partner and their abuse.
    We are strong enough to make it through.. don’t give up.. live learn and get better!!

  • @princessj830
    @princessj830 4 роки тому +6

    Right on Mr. Jaxn!!!

  • @jptak77
    @jptak77 4 роки тому +1

    I had a great man. I was going through stuff and he didn’t want to deal with it. I don’t blame him. I wish things would have been different. He is still a man I love.

    • @josephBC3652
      @josephBC3652 4 роки тому

      i wish you all the best my Queen!!!!

  • @Macch2275
    @Macch2275 3 роки тому +1

    What an insightful intelligent person you are!

  • @dotology
    @dotology 4 роки тому +1

    I'm extremely glad that people like Derrick giving genuine advice on self worth are gaining bigger and bigger audience

  • @jasminewise7098
    @jasminewise7098 3 роки тому

    I believe he does enjoy seeing me broke down and trying my best to get him to be with me. Knowing he has no intention of being with me, better yet, staying with me. So ty. Perfectly said!!🎀

  • @Qumi222
    @Qumi222 4 роки тому +12

    My bd is a narcissist so I keep trying just to co parent. I am an empath & very forgiving because I became numb to dv & emotional abuse. Please make a video about coparenting with a narcissist.

  • @MoonFoxASMR
    @MoonFoxASMR 4 роки тому +1

    Thank you so much. I've put way too much love and effort into this scrub.

  • @melissaamin2772
    @melissaamin2772 4 роки тому

    So true. I had to get out the same type of toxicity. It was hard, but I did it!

  • @jovitaboniface386
    @jovitaboniface386 4 роки тому

    Thank you Derrick. Blocking has not helped. But your videos hv been empowering me. I wished I'd seen your videos when I first moved here. I will thank God for the "now". I can't understand why kindness is seen as weakness here.

  • @tileewitcher1201
    @tileewitcher1201 4 роки тому +2

    I swear this was for me. God must be talking to me.. thank you very much as I really needed to hear this!!!!

  • @aleksandrakobiela6526
    @aleksandrakobiela6526 4 роки тому

    Thank you so much Derrick. You saved my heart.

  • @bettygballou8397
    @bettygballou8397 4 роки тому

    It's crazy and heartbreaking how some people come into our lives but don't value us at all. 🤦🏾‍♀️ Thanks for the advice.

  • @taga8006
    @taga8006 4 роки тому +6

    I've been through a breakup for like 4 years lmao, it was so draining!

  • @lisag5046
    @lisag5046 4 роки тому +1

    Thank you for confirmation! Truly thank you Mr. Jaxn be blessed!

  • @spiritualpriestess1316
    @spiritualpriestess1316 3 роки тому

    Had to hear this for the fifth time.....Just for validation.
    I absolutely forget my crown constantly, but I make SURE those around me....never forget theirs. Whether they are a narc. or not. Because narc.'s in your life, are not limited to love connections.

  • @freedom768
    @freedom768 4 роки тому

    Let them go ,it will safe you cleaning up their mess ,focus on your value, rise above..

  • @kcharrabranch8773
    @kcharrabranch8773 4 роки тому +6

    This was right on time

  • @DayDreamerbyDhang
    @DayDreamerbyDhang 4 роки тому +1

    This is exactly what happened to me. I've been asking my ex to make things better for almost 2yrs...I've negotiated, cried...and all I got was broken promises to change and get better. In the end he dumped me for a girl who is 32yrs younger than him. He's a real covert narcissist.

  • @Alicia-gp7nh
    @Alicia-gp7nh 4 роки тому

    Amen! It took me awhile, but I now know I couldn't ask someone to see in me, what I didn't see in myself! I also know that people who want to reduce or erase your value, have none of their own. Get away from people with this low vibration and worthless thinking so you can welcome people who match your light and love! ❤

  • @xi504
    @xi504 3 роки тому +1

    Self love is the greatest gift of all!

  • @Dia_Hunny_Boo
    @Dia_Hunny_Boo 3 роки тому

    Nothing worse then loving someone who’s ok hurting you while ignoring their actions as the main source. 🖖🏾✌🏾 I’m out! So ready to be free.

  • @julietberry7628
    @julietberry7628 4 роки тому

    Love this guy. He knows what is going on, And him being easy on the eyes 👀 is an extra added bonus.

  • @meicealways5842
    @meicealways5842 4 роки тому +7

    I did kinda break down during this video
    He always hits a nerve with me

  • @oohno1000
    @oohno1000 4 роки тому +2

    I have everything that I need and love is all around me