"I'll be your mirror, reflect what you are, in case you don't know..." This is the most invaluable resource I have come across yet in helping me truly understand myself and especially my motivations. And just at the right time too, as I contemplate career and relationships in my next phase of life. Thank you for this clear, comprehensive and brutally frank piece that will no doubt serve as a wake up call to all Type 2s out there.
hello there, as a 2w3 I am so happy that you really get it. you do! it hurts and it is hard but also wonderful to listen to your analysis of the 2s :) you are dead right. I am a semi healthy 2, I love me-time, bjt I am highly co-dependent and yes, mediocre ppl are like irresistable to me..I get why, even before your video. but to change it is a whole different thing. I need to fill this void inside myself without feeding it with being needed by people. I love self exploring and I see where my fear of abandonment comes from as a daughter of an alcoholic and abusive dad. Pride is our sin, wow..., a tough one to hear but again, so correct. It is a power game, we want to be important in ppl's lives otherwise we don't feel worthy and important. And as an overly helpful person I even get angry if ppl don't want my help..I try to be happy that they are getting along without me, but it is a process. Thank you for calling us out, you seem to be a devoted therapist 🎉
❤ 😊 Awe. What helps you heal? For me, it was experiencing meditations and silent retreats (as Drew mentioned). I am doing research about this topic. I would love to hear about your journey, actualy! We could meet on Facebook or instagram, if thats exciting. I am talking with wonderful folks so far 😊. Happy to read from you. 😊
That’s awesome! Thanks for watching. Sorry for the delay, I’m just seeing this, some pass through without me catching them. Nice to have a colleague watching. 😉
As a 2w3 Mickey Singer’s teachings and talks have really helped me build my self worth. Leaning into the spiritual side has given me power in my two self! I like how you highlighted holding on to the old and familiar. Instead of moving in to a new person. Will be thinking of this now!
So sorry for the delay. Thanks so much for watching! I put a hard boundary on my time in the last year so I could write a book, which I just finished the first draft 🙌🏼 Know that I always appreciate every remark/response and try to get back to each and every one. If at all interested send me your email through instagram or my email to be on my mailing list Insta - @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy OR Drew@DrewNewkirk.com Hope all is well and thanks again Drew
I went to a type 2 therapist. It was traumatizing and damaging even though the therapist was of course very, very nice and completely convinced of herself and what she thought was right for me. Not only did I fall deeper in depression and unhealthy habits that she blindly reinforced. She only paid attention to how she could be in my life helping me, but it was smothering and there was a constant feeling that I owed something back to her (in the form of gratefulness and closeness). There was at no time any focus on my strenght, like you said I was infatilised which made my already critical sitation even more directionsless and unstable. I did not want all of that but at that time I was unable to communicate my boundaries because I grew up with the esoteric belief that I have to be grateful for anything in my life and so I felt obliged to stay and "pratice" my gratefulness (compulsive thinking which was of course nerve spotted even though I tried to talk about that in therpay). It was so wrong the whole time. Now I have to get over feelings of resentment and practice forgiveness because after 'therapy' I was at rock bottom and I am only slowly feeling myself again and realizing all of what went wrong. What angers me is the lack of thinking and self reflection, and how they are so full of themselves that there is no perception at all for what someone else feels, thinks amd communicates. Even saying what I wanted/not wanted was not heard or misinterpreted.
I’ve been so behind on responding to UA-cam messages, my apologies 🙏🏼 I’m working on a book this year and fully immersed. Sounds like you might have run into a unhealthy 2 there. Of course, not all twos are unhealthy but when you run into one, it can be pretty brutal when they are a therapist. And of course, a lot of therapist can be twos because of the caregiving. Sorry you had to go through that and hope you recover and trust in the process with healers again. Thanks for watching this. If you’re interested in being on my mailing list drop your email on instagram @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy or drew@drewnewkirk.com hopefully I’ll continue to create some cool stuff to share
Well shoot. You nailed that, and now I understand why I test as a 2 but my therapist(a 4) keeps saying I may be a 4. I appreciate how you lovingly called us 2’s out. Thank you for your videos!!
I’ve been so behind on responding to UA-cam messages, my apologies 🙏🏼 I’m working on a book this year and fully immersed. No doubt, Lisa, I tried to confront with some compassion, but also feistiness. Thanks for following along and I’m glad it helped, it can be hard to narrow down what we are and as a therapist I know I’ve gotten it wrong before with my clients. Hope you are continuing to dig in and find out where you land. If you’re interested in being on my mailing list drop your email on instagram @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy or drew@drewnewkirk.com hopefully I’ll continue to create some cool stuff to share
I’ve been so behind on responding to UA-cam messages, my apologies 🙏🏼 I’m working on a book this year and fully immersed. No problem though, I loved doing these! Have a good one and keep digging for answers. If you’re interested in being on my mailing list drop your email on instagram @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy or drew@drewnewkirk.com hopefully I’ll continue to create some cool stuff to share
I'm a sexual 2w1 with a lot of 4 due to being neurodivergent & gifted. As a teenager I became a kind of counter-2 because I was rejected for being different so I rejected others. I second the solitude. I practice Zen Buddhism & find it is perfect medicine for Type 2. I spent 3 years in solitude in nature & found myself shifting my need for relationship with people to relationship with nature & spirituality. Now I'm working in Indigenous language revitalization (Ojibwe) & have found real affinity with Indigenous values & Type 2 emphasis on relationship & reciprocity. Serving others now is part of serving a greater cause & so I can do it selflessly & keep good boundaries to maintain my energy levels.
I’ve been so behind on responding to UA-cam messages, my apologies 🙏🏼 I’m working on a book this year and fully immersed. Very impressive my friend. You are tackling life with a lot of intentionality. Much props! If you’re interested in being on my mailing list drop your email on instagram @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy or drew@drewnewkirk.com hopefully I’ll continue to create some cool stuff to share
@@Karenjc31 thank you so much my friend. And thanks so much for watching! Glad it helped If interested send me your email through instagram or my email to be on my mailing list Insta - @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy OR Drew@DrewNewkirk.com Hope all is well and thanks again for reaching out Drew
😮 😮 Why aren't we being met halfway? Repressing is not creating what we enjoy. We can be beautiful. Attracting what we enjoy. I even made a video about reconnecting to our intention, as a Enneagram 2! So awesome thanks for THIS video inspiration. ☆ kind regards, A sweet 2
@@Asdannce thank you so much my friend. Glad it helped and that you’re doing the good work of healing others If interested send me your email through instagram or my email to be on my mailing list Insta - @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy OR Drew@DrewNewkirk.com Hope all is well and thanks again for reaching out Drew
Love this deep dive. On a totally separate note, as one four to another, I have to tell you that I LOVE the eclectic background decor behind you… so beautiful.
Its been difficult for me to find out if I am a 9 or 2. I can see some 2 traits in me. But also a lot of 9. But I think I know now. One thing you said. 2’s don’t want to alone, and I love being alone. I love when I don’t have to do anything. (And I am so afraid of anger!). I think I am a 9.
Check out the video I did on dating, I try to cover a lot of that through the dating framework... So sorry for the delay. Thanks so much for watching! I put a hard boundary on my time in the last year so I could write a book, which I just finished the first draft 🙌🏼 Know that I always appreciate every remark/response and try to get back to each and every one. If at all interested send me your email through instagram or my email to be on my mailing list Insta - @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy OR Drew@DrewNewkirk.com Hope all is well and thanks again Drew
"I'll be your mirror, reflect what you are, in case you don't know..." This is the most invaluable resource I have come across yet in helping me truly understand myself and especially my motivations. And just at the right time too, as I contemplate career and relationships in my next phase of life. Thank you for this clear, comprehensive and brutally frank piece that will no doubt serve as a wake up call to all Type 2s out there.
hello there, as a 2w3 I am so happy that you really get it. you do! it hurts and it is hard but also wonderful to listen to your analysis of the 2s :) you are dead right. I am a semi healthy 2, I love me-time, bjt I am highly co-dependent and yes, mediocre ppl are like irresistable to me..I get why, even before your video. but to change it is a whole different thing. I need to fill this void inside myself without feeding it with being needed by people. I love self exploring and I see where my fear of abandonment comes from as a daughter of an alcoholic and abusive dad. Pride is our sin, wow..., a tough one to hear but again, so correct. It is a power game, we want to be important in ppl's lives otherwise we don't feel worthy and important. And as an overly helpful person I even get angry if ppl don't want my help..I try to be happy that they are getting along without me, but it is a process. Thank you for calling us out, you seem to be a devoted therapist 🎉
❤ 😊 Awe. What helps you heal? For me, it was experiencing meditations and silent retreats (as Drew mentioned).
I am doing research about this topic. I would love to hear about your journey, actualy!
We could meet on Facebook or instagram, if thats exciting. I am talking with wonderful folks so far 😊.
Happy to read from you. 😊
Thank you for this video. I’m a Type 2 therapist myself and I feel very understood. 😊
That’s awesome! Thanks for watching. Sorry for the delay, I’m just seeing this, some pass through without me catching them. Nice to have a colleague watching. 😉
Yes, SO many ISFJ/ESFJ males who tend to be 2s!!!
As a 2w3 Mickey Singer’s teachings and talks have really helped me build my self worth. Leaning into the spiritual side has given me power in my two self! I like how you highlighted holding on to the old and familiar. Instead of moving in to a new person. Will be thinking of this now!
So sorry for the delay. Thanks so much for watching! I put a hard boundary on my time in the last year so I could write a book, which I just finished the first draft 🙌🏼 Know that I always appreciate every remark/response and try to get back to each and every one.
If at all interested send me your email through instagram or my email to be on my mailing list
Insta - @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy OR Drew@DrewNewkirk.com
Hope all is well and thanks again
Drew
I went to a type 2 therapist. It was traumatizing and damaging even though the therapist was of course very, very nice and completely convinced of herself and what she thought was right for me. Not only did I fall deeper in depression and unhealthy habits that she blindly reinforced. She only paid attention to how she could be in my life helping me, but it was smothering and there was a constant feeling that I owed something back to her (in the form of gratefulness and closeness). There was at no time any focus on my strenght, like you said I was infatilised which made my already critical sitation even more directionsless and unstable. I did not want all of that but at that time I was unable to communicate my boundaries because I grew up with the esoteric belief that I have to be grateful for anything in my life and so I felt obliged to stay and "pratice" my gratefulness (compulsive thinking which was of course nerve spotted even though I tried to talk about that in therpay). It was so wrong the whole time. Now I have to get over feelings of resentment and practice forgiveness because after 'therapy' I was at rock bottom and I am only slowly feeling myself again and realizing all of what went wrong. What angers me is the lack of thinking and self reflection, and how they are so full of themselves that there is no perception at all for what someone else feels, thinks amd communicates. Even saying what I wanted/not wanted was not heard or misinterpreted.
I’ve been so behind on responding to UA-cam messages, my apologies 🙏🏼
I’m working on a book this year and fully immersed.
Sounds like you might have run into a unhealthy 2 there. Of course, not all twos are unhealthy but when you run into one, it can be pretty brutal when they are a therapist. And of course, a lot of therapist can be twos because of the caregiving. Sorry you had to go through that and hope you recover and trust in the process with healers again. Thanks for watching this.
If you’re interested in being on my mailing list drop your email on instagram @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy or drew@drewnewkirk.com hopefully I’ll continue to create some cool stuff to share
@@drewnewkirk Thank you for your understanding! Your videos very informative and comprhensive, keep doing them :)
Well shoot. You nailed that, and now I understand why I test as a 2 but my therapist(a 4) keeps saying I may be a 4. I appreciate how you lovingly called us 2’s out. Thank you for your videos!!
I’ve been so behind on responding to UA-cam messages, my apologies 🙏🏼
I’m working on a book this year and fully immersed.
No doubt, Lisa, I tried to confront with some compassion, but also feistiness. Thanks for following along and I’m glad it helped, it can be hard to narrow down what we are and as a therapist I know I’ve gotten it wrong before with my clients. Hope you are continuing to dig in and find out where you land.
If you’re interested in being on my mailing list drop your email on instagram @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy or drew@drewnewkirk.com hopefully I’ll continue to create some cool stuff to share
Excellent video. Thank you.
I’ve been so behind on responding to UA-cam messages, my apologies 🙏🏼
I’m working on a book this year and fully immersed.
No problem though, I loved doing these! Have a good one and keep digging for answers.
If you’re interested in being on my mailing list drop your email on instagram @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy or drew@drewnewkirk.com hopefully I’ll continue to create some cool stuff to share
I'm a sexual 2w1 with a lot of 4 due to being neurodivergent & gifted. As a teenager I became a kind of counter-2 because I was rejected for being different so I rejected others. I second the solitude. I practice Zen Buddhism & find it is perfect medicine for Type 2. I spent 3 years in solitude in nature & found myself shifting my need for relationship with people to relationship with nature & spirituality. Now I'm working in Indigenous language revitalization (Ojibwe) & have found real affinity with Indigenous values & Type 2 emphasis on relationship & reciprocity. Serving others now is part of serving a greater cause & so I can do it selflessly & keep good boundaries to maintain my energy levels.
I’ve been so behind on responding to UA-cam messages, my apologies 🙏🏼
I’m working on a book this year and fully immersed.
Very impressive my friend. You are tackling life with a lot of intentionality. Much props!
If you’re interested in being on my mailing list drop your email on instagram @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy or drew@drewnewkirk.com hopefully I’ll continue to create some cool stuff to share
Nice job. I am a 76yr old two still trying to get it right. My library is self-help books. Thank you.
@@Karenjc31 thank you so much my friend. And thanks so much for watching! Glad it helped
If interested send me your email through instagram or my email to be on my mailing list
Insta - @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy OR Drew@DrewNewkirk.com
Hope all is well and thanks again for reaching out
Drew
😮 😮 Why aren't we being met halfway? Repressing is not creating what we enjoy. We can be beautiful. Attracting what we enjoy. I even made a video about reconnecting to our intention, as a Enneagram 2! So awesome thanks for THIS video inspiration. ☆ kind regards, A sweet 2
The deeper you go, the higher you rise!
Type 2 therapists here! Thanks for the video
@@Asdannce thank you so much my friend. Glad it helped and that you’re doing the good work of healing others
If interested send me your email through instagram or my email to be on my mailing list
Insta - @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy OR Drew@DrewNewkirk.com
Hope all is well and thanks again for reaching out
Drew
Very good video Sir
Love this deep dive. On a totally separate note, as one four to another, I have to tell you that I LOVE the eclectic background decor behind you… so beautiful.
Ha! Thanks. Every day I want to completely start over on the decor… which is also very 4ish 🤦♂️
@@drewnewkirk , I completely understand that 😂
Its been difficult for me to find out if I am a 9 or 2. I can see some 2 traits in me. But also a lot of 9. But I think I know now. One thing you said. 2’s don’t want to alone, and I love being alone. I love when I don’t have to do anything. (And I am so afraid of anger!). I think I am a 9.
It’s quite a journey right? We can really have two strong pulls. Glad it’s starting to land for you Kathrine
It really is! I decided I want to be friends with and feel my anger! Feel like it is a big step.
Can you do a video on what healthy relationships look like for each type?
Check out the video I did on dating, I try to cover a lot of that through the dating framework...
So sorry for the delay. Thanks so much for watching! I put a hard boundary on my time in the last year so I could write a book, which I just finished the first draft 🙌🏼 Know that I always appreciate every remark/response and try to get back to each and every one.
If at all interested send me your email through instagram or my email to be on my mailing list
Insta - @drewnewkirkpsychotherapy OR Drew@DrewNewkirk.com
Hope all is well and thanks again
Drew
I can’t be loved for who I am, so I must perform a role 🙈
126 each has difficulty having independent inventory.
4 is 2’s kryptonite!
3 seeks admiration
2 seeks appreciation
Other referencing vs
self referential
2s don’t know what others need deep down.
From needing to help to being available to help