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- Опубліковано 5 вер 2024
- Tim discusses the Comedy Store documentary on Showtime, the decor of Whitney Cummings party, bug-chasers and Ben's dark mind, the Candace Owen's backlash, and Ellen Degeneres's latest business venture in this crumbling metropolis.
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Actually the boomers & older made it so you can't actually just drive down the road or open a business or walk down the road or breathe air. But hey the boomers had a heck of a run right I mean the ME generation lol really did it justice. Game over kids later suckers.
The problem with McRib is if you saw it before that sauce & not frozen solid it looks like Freddy Kruger it looks like if they really did do Soylent Green which yeah I know I shouldn't even have said it still think it's plausible considering this dystopian Truman show dump.
You don't have the balls to have Ryan Dawson on the show
more please!
I love you, Tim. Your fans are retards, but you're fucking great.
Magic spoon sounds like a euphemism for doing heroin
Good one 😌
And the first one is free, of course.
I'm sure Tim has a cousin that's lost tons of weight with Magic Spoon.
lmao
Heroin is keto
“I thought I’d not be gay if women were more intelligent” -Tim Dillon
I absolutely pissed myself when I heard this. We need this man.
I’ve fallen asleep listening to Tim so many times that I’ve come to associate his screaming about the horrors of society with comfort.
Literally me
Horras
Same here ❤ it’s oddly comforting
I think Ben spoke the most in this episode . His eyes just lit up talking about piss pigs and glory holes.
I thought I was a sexual degenerate but I don't even know what a "piss pig" is.
I think our little boy might be a fan of YMH w/ Tom and Christine
lol
@Bobby Bush me too. I have done some shameful stuff with some of my ex gf’s to the point where I thought we had done it all and even pushed it to the next level. Now I realize I was just an amateur. Our sexual evolution as a species is borderline horrifying. It’s a knife fight out here living life in the big city.
Ben has bodies in his closet for sure.
I'm a simple man, I hear Tim referencing the Ellen Show as Abu Ghraib, I click thumbs up
No one likes you.
@@ctraltdel6510 projection is a virtue
@@ctraltdel6510 is the
@@ctraltdel6510 I like Ed
@@ctraltdel6510 no one likes ctr alt Del either, that's why windows got rid of it and it was one of Bill Gates biggest regrets
The best podcast in the world. Not kidding.
Name another podcast where you look forward to the ad reads baahahahahaha
Yes or yes
Give to the wealthy
Facts.
Hard to disagree
Ben choosing to platform Candace Owens is the reason I stole money from my parents
Noble reason. None the less.
They invented another 72 genders because of how upset they were that Ben platformed Candace.
@@rhelferstay 😂😂😂
That’s just life in the big city
@WillieIIIreborn that's why you furrcurious people are actually gendrixas
Officer: So, where ya going?
Tim: Going to get the McRib.
Officer: Let em go.
Lol don’t you guys have home delivery Maccas in the US??
DrKAP ~ who cares?
@@DawnWillDoIt it was a question so I care??
@digduck oh what do they deliver? Do they deliver Maccas? We got UberEats, Menulog, Deliveroo- a few others- they all do a whole bunch of restaurants but only UberEats deliver Maccas !
@@Dr_KAP the hell is Maccas?
Honestly I like it better when you don't interview other people, but I appreciate anything you put out.
I would listen to Tim commentate on drying wall paint.
This guy is a gem in the truest definition!
I like literally anything he puts out 😂
I like the comments better when you don't comment, but I'm still here.
"Hey let me tell you what I dont like about you. Love ya" lol
The guests are just pretty boring and it's not fun to see tim kiss his guest's asses.
Most interesting people to have on would get him deplatformed so we're stuck with based black women and face tattooed soundcloud rappers.
Whitney was great but I wasn't a fan of the other guest shows.
09:04 The LA lockdown is confusing, because you’re not supposed to leave your house, but the McRib is back 😭💀💯
i heard McDs created Covid to ruin all small restaurants and force everyone to eat their micro-chipped McRibs... yes or yes?
It's a kind of loyalty test, to see who's really committed to the lockdown for the long term.
Tim Dillon is a pleasant surprise that came into my life a year ago. I wish I heard of him earlier. Really funny
Same for me
@Semper Fortis He’s only polarizing if you take any of his crazy shit seriously. He shits on the left and right and it’s all bullshit which is what I’m looking for.
@@Wallyworld30 yes ! So fucking refreshing to have someone dismantle everything and in doing so I’m joyously lolling ...the mans a genius.
he pisses off the left sensitive types the most, and honestly I’m here for it
same as well but it’s only been a few months for me
I'm an Irish woman and Tim reminds me of my favorite uncle. Love you long time Tim. Biggest fan.
I cannot express my gratitude to this man for the hour or so that he frees my mind every Saturday
Get on the patreon best money ever spent. Need steady doses of tim 🤣
I’m screamin!
@@marinoutdoors just joined 2 weeks ago that shit is fantastic
Oh god... please
i save him for mondays at work. gives me a little suntin to look forward to. that and a couple key bumps to get me through the day. truly a delight.
Tim is enjoying the smooth texture of his new podcast table 1:14:33
"I have not sold out, I have bought in"
That is the mission statement of my new fake business.
Awkwardly early for church..
Lmao
The leader can deliver his sermons at any time, yes or yes?
@Rust Davy 524 here in the UK. Yes or yes 👍
Its 8: 28am in Kenya...an early bird sermon
Right on time
29:13 "What is a piss pig?" My favorite answer from Jeopardy.
Tim has became the new GOAT of comedy. You CANNOT cancel this man, yes or yes?
How do you cancel someone who has nothing to lose ?
Yes
Tim’s great but not the GOAT you are looking for.
@@TheGeorgeous Ben will cancel him from the show and bring in Ellen
Where are my jewels.
Max Greenfield's character in "The Big Short" was inspired by Long Island subprime mortgage slinger Timmy Dillon.
Every time Tim says "Abu Ghraib" a Jihadist gets his wings (droned)
What does Abu Ghraib mean?
@JULIUS CAESAR All Hail Caesar.
I laughed 😁
"Does anybody remember laughter?" - Robert Plant
I should be in bed but I stay up for this every Saturday 😂
Do what I do and watch in bed.
This was not the comment I was expecting
Me too dude.
Stop trying to catch clout from the biggest podcaster in the world. Take your fake business elsewhere.
@@susie7336 get off his jock
All the glass in my house shattered during the Magic Spoon add read.
Tim is literally the only comedian yes or yes
Theo Von baby
Yes, but also Nick Mullen.
Imagine other comics. Why try?
@@6vitamin because I'm gay for them.
mark normand says gay and stuff so idk
Someone very close to me was sexually assaulted while intoxicated by someone they trusted a lot- it happens, probably more than most people know. But you're completely right, and this segment helped me laugh about the subject in a way I haven't been able to in a while- and it helped me a lot. Thanks Tim, you always do wonders.
Well that's not very funny!
At the least the McRib is back
The fact that Tim doesn't have a polo on tells me that the cia.gov partnership has changed him.... yes or yes
Totally agree.. What's next? a fucking Spotify deal?
@@wonderwoop rogan has apparently stopped loading to UA-cam so... We'll wait and see what Tim does
Hahah. Good line.
You’re not supposed to leave the house in LA
BUT THE MCRIB IS BACK
My church is listening to you with my whole family on Sunday. They made me go to church so I force this upon them
dillon: *jokes about womans intelligence*
Also: *Explains to said woman how the joke works* :D
Ben really leaned into the "I'm a piss pig!" thing, didn't he?
Somewhere out there Ray Kump is smiling.
He was passionate
Ben definitely spends a lot of time fantasizing about peeing on people. Not that there's anything wrong with that
Quite right haha i was laughing pretty hard.
And I'm glad he did because that was hilarious
Tim should have Jimmy Dore on the show.
Nah he's a sjw chitlord
@@binary not really he does get too preachy though
Jimmy Dore is not that funny. I've watched some of his videos and he's very loud and bombastic and seems like its forced laughter when everyone around him laughs. But he has decent commentary sometimes.
Absolutely!
@@binary, honestly far from lol. Dude's even stuck up for tucker carlson iirc.
threatening to sue his own advertisers...this is why i tune in every week
I love finding myself laughing and looking over to my dog staring at me!
Candace should be VERY happy she was given this wide reaching of a platform.
Maybe Tim will make her as famous as he made Rogan..
Tim has been so kind to Candace, Alex and Joe.
She has a Mega huge platform. She did Tim a favor on his little show.
@@deejaye2647 HOLY SHIT, LOOK UP!
WOAH did you see that?
Bro you missed the entiiiiiiiree joke!
@@deejaye2647 lol, its a joke bro.
Said in high falsetto voice:
"Magic spoon on my spoon!"
The magic spoon nerd 100% told Tim to create him a marketing jingle like ridge wallet...YUUUMM
im recovering from surgery, and had to stop watching this because i laughed for over 5 consecutive minutes and my heart starter hurting. tim dillon is the best rising comic right now, landslide victory
The pigs have received their weekly feeding
"Piss Pigs"
- Ben
Hilarious comment
Ben is so underrated for this show.. his laughs and now that's he's getting a lil more confident of putting on the show it's awesome. love it guys
Tim is back and he's getting more women pregnant than Tracy Morgan.
“I’m Tracy Morgan!-The Other Black Guy!!”
Tim Dillon featuring in 30(0 pounds) Rock
He’s definitely having babies the natural way then telling the lady oh umm yaaa you knew the deal ...... like a gangster slapping down a ward of cash and walking out with the kid...
@@mikeyboston7295 my mans don’t like vagina doe
Yep, he also makes Whitney Cummings more interesting just by being her friend... she's never really told a good joke in her life.
#whiteknightsimparmyriseup
Only Tim Dillon can Bring on Candace Owens and say he mistook Candace for Megan the Stallion
Excuse you, Megan *thee Stallion.
*Tim Dillon is the best fake businessman of* *our time. Yes or yes?*
Nothing fake about it. I'm a mark for it!
Yes.
Si y si
No. DRUMPF is
If you don't go with less you leave the toilet seat up and are a piece of shit.
"Piss all over me, shit all over me"
-Ben
Home here now
After Candace Owens last week I wasnt expecting a Ghislaine appearance yes or yes?
The second half of this is like a Beethoven symphony
I haven’t even heard it all the way threw but I feel that! I’m excited 😛
I don't think even Beethoven himself could have hit those notes..
Within 5 seconds after returning from ads i screamed the magic spoon jingle and my girl just looked at me like shes about to leave me
"Those three communist ghosts" in A Christmas Carol. -- Epic Dillonism
2020 seems like a book co-authored by Tim Dillon, Eddie Bravo, and Sam Tripoli. A Stranger than fiction scenario narrated into existence by 9/11 truthers and flat earthers. Its titled 'Covid can't melt steel beams.
subheading "controlled wildfires took down building 7"
"The only thing fun about Whitney's friendsgiving was that Tim Dillon showed up and told us how bad it was" ~ everyone in LA
Bop bop bop
In her defense I will say that she was probably doing the cdc recommendation of using disposable everything - she probably threw everything out after the meal that would explain the fake forks and ugly plates - stupid of course but an explanation at least
Greetings from Kenya, God knows I have been waiting for something new.
What do people eat in Kenya? Like, what's a standard breakfast, lunch and dinner?
@@D4n1t0o
Breakfast - Tea and Bread.
Lunch- Rice and Beef stew / beans and greens.
Dinner- Chapati( Somehow like Naan bread) and a stew of some kind.
All that costs around 5$ if not less.
@@kui_maina Noice 👌🏼 I've had chapati with Indian food before 😊 How do you celebrate Christmas differently, if you do? I'm guessing, perhaps ignorantly, that it never really gets cold in Africa?
@@kui_maina yum!! sounds like India (without the meat) :)
@@D4n1t0o i find ur questions very sweet and sincere. i hope they get back to you, altho i'm picturing like most of Africa is equatorial, and the rest of the continent is below that, so they probably have opposite summer/ winter like we do with Aus. i would think in Kenya, they are alot turned Muslim areas these days, but also used to be the region of Coptic Christians, like Ethiopia, very Christian.
i have a tough time with xmas here in the u.s. It's so beautiful and i love the spirit of it (despite the blatant consumerism, more so the drinks and food), but in actuality, it is NOT really Christian at all so......
“I have not sold out, I have bought in” is one of the greatest lines I have heard on a podcast.
The video for this podcast is like when you go to take a piss in the middle of the night and see ghosts in your room
I used to be addicted to heroin, now I'm addicted to Tim Dillon..
Jesus! Go back to heroin buddy!
I picked the wrong year to give up qualudes.
Where and the hell do you procure ludes in this decade?! Your a legend
Lmaooooooo
Cocaine and The Tim Dillon Show is the way to live
Shame on Ben for springing Candace Owens on little Timmy like that
#CancelBen
Ben is unforgivable.
“Ladies and gentlemen welcome to the Tim Dillon show” is what I need to sleep every night
Welcome to the church of tim
“My aunt shot herself in the face.”- Tim Dillon
“Neat.” -Me
"I always thought that I wouldn't be gay, if women were intelligent."
This podcast has made me a more balanced person.
I feel like we should be a little more outraged that a rich kid is going around passing out covid-19 blankets to the poor.
I mean a poor kid won't do it. They can't afford the blankets.
For real tho - he said it was to save the animals cuz it doesnt use fur. What world does he live in where all his blankets were made of fur? I've never even seen a fur blanket.
I have outrage fatigue. I don’t care about anything anymore.
Don’t worry, they’re lousy with small pox
Better check his PRIVELLGE
I heard Tim’s fake business made 2 billion in online sales on Black Friday
OMG that bit about the Ellen's blankets made from the hair of her interns being handed out to the homeless by Tik-Tok kids 😂😂🤣
i love how real Ben's reaction are, even he doesn't expect the wild shit Tim says.
"She looked me straight in the face and said, I love heroin"
Man Timmy D. really excels at seeing through all manner of bullshit and being ballsy enough to say something funny about it like few other comics left except for Norm Macdonald and a select few others
the piece of hair that dances around as Tim talks is a vibe
LIFE IN THE BIG CITY!
1:01:24 "do you ever have somebody get really excited about all the things they wanna help you with, and you go, ehhhhhh, back off" Brilliant
It sounds like Ben is a big freaky boi.
I think he has a yellow bandana. He knows the hankie codes.
Give to those who have more, it's the American way.
This is the highlight to my Saturdays.
"give to those who have more, your real friends are those that are around when you're doing well" what Tim said... is REAL shit lol.
Giving to those who have more is being a good friend to your buddy who's doing well and being supportive and still there for them while not being jealous.
Praise be to Dillion and his fledgling Benny
What a wonderful time of year
I can't ever quit you, Timmy.
Its crazy how Tim Dillon is the MAIN media I consume now. I went from "He's pretty funny" to "I might need to subscribe to The Rothschild tier so I can have more..."
Tim is the only upload I drop whatever I’m doing...
Even while I’m balls deep in the Techno zone!
Tim has truly forged himself the position of quintessential anchor of the end of the world. 🔥
Pioneer? Yes or yes.
Tim has never said something not jokingly in any of the hours I've listen to him and thats why he's the GOAT
this has to be one of the best episodes
Anyone else eagerly awaiting Tim's new year's resolutions? I need more guidance for next year's unprecedented times
I would give anything to be able to speak as articulately and freely as this man does
I heard Jay Leno has a huge mansion edit: huge man-chin*
Oh yes
Ba-dum *tssss*
Can we Push for 2hr Pods!? The other L.A. Casters are getting Weak!
Tim Dillon has more jokes hidden in a box under his desk.
99.9779% of them are hilarious.
Legend is, he doesn’t pull them out until after he kicks everyone out.
Entirely underrated
I absolutely love tim dillon, so refreshing
I didn’t even think Ben was at the Candace interview 😂
i only started watching you since you interviewed candace owens...great show, i'm rewatching it all
My cousin Mia loved this episode Tim
RIP Tim’s aunt.
Tim is a savior in the times of Salem witch trials 2.0
"The couples watch together."
This lady watches alone.
I love Tim Dillon!
Can you tell me about your time in jail?
First 15 mins and my ribs already broke from laughing!!! He's coming out shooting like the sun dance kid!! Tim the sundance kid
"I told you so festival " hit to the bone . I literally had to check out for a bit to laugh .lol. thanks Tim
You know pork prices are low when the Mc rib comes back!
A Christmas Carol, the original "undercover boss"
I’m on a 2 day coke & vodka bender. I have zero attention span for anything else but this.
Good luck 👍
Stop being greedy and let me join the party. We could go another week or so. I know it’s possible from personal experience.
God speed
“ live in the security that you are correct, all the time! Even when you are not right, be right” - Tim Dillon the prophet of the apocalypse
This dropping makes my night
When I showed my girlfriend this podcast it did not go well HAHAHAHA horror I’ll keep watching solo haha keep it KUMP
The only reason I'm up is cause my kids father assaulted me and I'm waiting for the protective order. Huzzah this is what I've needed all week. The opening is just 😂
Let me know when you move on and want to upgrade from physical abuse to emotional and mental abuse..I’m single 😏
@@FBrezzy6694 haha nah I'm good I have three little.
@Semper Fortis No! The grits are worth more!!
All jokes aside, stay strong. Don’t take no shit, not for you- but for those kids. They don’t deserve that kind of life, and you no matter how imperfect don’t deserve to be hit. Don’t take him back, don’t accept the apology. Block his ass, follow your protective order, & get your life back on track mama. You can really do this. You’d be surprised what you can do when your kids truly depend on it. Peace (hopefully soon) and much love to you ❤️😘😘😂
"I want to enjoy the holidays as much as I can, as someone without a family or many friends and who's disgusted by most of what he sees and hears and feels...". Fucking perfect.
I wish this was twice a week i starve for more Timothy