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My Parents forced me into Marriage and this happened…

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  • Опубліковано 8 лют 2022
  • My Parents forced me into Marriage and this happened…
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 54

  • @margyiphillips4931
    @margyiphillips4931 2 роки тому +46

    When it comes to abuse, the sooner one gets out, the less therapy one needs. The abuser never changes.

  • @ativiejonathan3705
    @ativiejonathan3705 2 роки тому +14

    I am not in support of unhappy marriage

  • @oasis2909
    @oasis2909 2 роки тому +22

    Yes phrankleen, not all mothers are good mothers.

    • @Olori-Ogun
      @Olori-Ogun 2 роки тому

      I knew a very evil one for most of my life

  • @louisdowyaro6012
    @louisdowyaro6012 2 роки тому +22

    I am a huge fan and I love ur ideas on topics u discuss on ur Chanel. A lot of people are not opened minded and is difficult for them to understand. Peace brother

  • @peacecdaniel8946
    @peacecdaniel8946 2 роки тому +4

    This things are common in Yoruba land. My neighbours daughter got pregnant and she was forced to go live with the boys family at iyana ipaja. They are not together today.
    Another one few streets from mine got pregnant and she was forced to do introduction and go live with the guys parents. She suffered. The boy beats her. They went on to have another child. Today they are not together. The abuse was too much and the guy disrespects her.

  • @simplyblooming1649
    @simplyblooming1649 2 роки тому +7

    Thanks for this discussion Mr. Phrankleen. Some of the commments are the reason this discussion is so necessary. She does need counseling/therapy. It is hard now but it will get better. I'm glad she had the courage to walk away from a toxic situation, even if it took a while to do so. I think it is important to note that there a situationa like this where the relationship has actually worked fine, BUT it does not make the practice of forcing marriage due to pregnancy right.

  • @cocobenji6123
    @cocobenji6123 2 роки тому +16

    This is too funny. Phrankleen, you don't take no crap from none of them lol. So what if the woman is a doctor or something and works long hours, I guess some of the men might starve? This why both men and women must learn how to cook. Days are gone where women alone are expected to cook.

  • @thetwinklegg8121
    @thetwinklegg8121 2 роки тому +6

    Phrankleen, see towards the end where you speak about the role of a father in the life of his children from a young age? Please, please put it in a short video. More people need to see it.

  • @tombimashri8149
    @tombimashri8149 2 роки тому +3

    Phrankleen I aplaud you ND Pastor Shola who are bringing open mindedness opposed to backward mindedness in Naija as well as those in Africa who are still backward thinkers.

  • @peacecdaniel8946
    @peacecdaniel8946 2 роки тому +5

    It's no shame at all. My cousin got pregnant at 17. But my Uncle is educated and never told her to go and live in the inlaws house.
    As a matter of fact, the boy denied the pregnancy, he confessed he slept with her but he claimed he's not the only one that she sleep with. So imagine sending her to live with the family because the boy himself was just in 100 level and she just finished secondary school.

  • @kiv_daniels
    @kiv_daniels 3 місяці тому

    Thank you Mr Phrankleen. We need to learn to put ourselves first instead of caring about what other people think. Talking about her parents saved her from shame, what shame? When your suffering, these people that you care so much about and what they think, where will they be? Her mom could have taken care of the baby( I know it not her responsibility) and she could have gone back to school. I’ve seen several situations like these, some of these girls move on to better careers (one I know is a nurse in USA). Fine some don’t learn their lessons but how would you know if you don’t give them the chance.

  • @sandraokoh2603
    @sandraokoh2603 2 роки тому +4

    Huge fan…. You always say it as it iz

  • @ebkemi8619
    @ebkemi8619 2 роки тому +3

    The parents were selfish in their decision. Forced marriage was not and is never the answer in situations like this. Unfortunately they missed the point of their Christian faith it's not about their image, how they could have shown love to their daughter inspite of her mistake., but they were more concerned about their status, and treated her like a property has she had no choice in the marriage.

  • @bbhappyanyway
    @bbhappyanyway 2 роки тому +1

    I love watching your channel. Thank you

  • @sarahrhapsody
    @sarahrhapsody 2 роки тому +5

    Phrankleen just wanted to say I’ve started my initiation in IFÁ, thanks to all your advises here . I’d not have taken that step of courage without watching your videos . Turns out I even have ancestral priesthood, I’m very happy and done my first ebó. Thank you

    • @Phrankleen13
      @Phrankleen13  2 роки тому +1

      Awesome 👏🏾, wish you success in this way of life

  • @clementwilberforce5364
    @clementwilberforce5364 2 роки тому +1

    I agree with you 100%

  • @margyiphillips4931
    @margyiphillips4931 2 роки тому +21

    Phrankleen, did men marry for love back in the day? Haba, a man married to have kids. Take a survey back home today and ask men this question: "Do you love your wife?" " Were you in love with your wife before you married her?" You'd be surprised by the response you get.

    • @tombimashri8149
      @tombimashri8149 2 роки тому +2

      From what I Ve heard marriages back than were mainly arranged marriages, love ????

    • @africanqueen5292
      @africanqueen5292 2 роки тому +2

      A lot of men don’t marry for love ❤️

  • @obaaAkos02
    @obaaAkos02 2 роки тому +5

    1st to comment. Missed the LIVE. Watching replay now.

  • @mnaagain8295
    @mnaagain8295 2 роки тому +1

    It could have gone either way... Good marriage or bad marriage... It didn't work out and she's peace's out! Good for her!

  • @25Greatman
    @25Greatman 2 роки тому

    Hey Chika, I will block you....🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @ellehcin2056
    @ellehcin2056 2 роки тому

    Definitely true NOT ALL MOMS ARE GOOD MOMS. Granddaughter growing up without hers..has to lean on her father for direction

  • @Festigreat
    @Festigreat 2 роки тому +1

    The concept of "Having a Child out of Wedlock" steamed from Eurocentric religious inclination. Many of these parents are completely selfish and are protecting their social and religious status rather than look out for the interests of their children. Many women today are in forced marriage that they are not happy with but can't walk away because of religious reprisals or societal criticism. Peace and love ❤️ @phrankleen

  • @clarewilliams1223
    @clarewilliams1223 2 роки тому

    So true love you

  • @sunnyking7802
    @sunnyking7802 2 роки тому +3

    Though i don't blame her parents, but they suppose to have forgiven her, and listen to what she's going through in that early life mistakes, sex involvement.

  • @loverizer8414
    @loverizer8414 2 роки тому +7

    Hey bro 19 and 21 years old that choose to have unprotected s3x should not expect their parents to shoulder the responsibility. The parents asking her/them to step up and take charge and control of her/their action i don't think is wrong.
    You may find a problem with that but i personal don't.

    • @loisgabs
      @loisgabs 2 роки тому +7

      Taking care of their child is not the same as being made to marry. I'm sure it works for some people but it really depends on the personalities of the parties involved. So many of our people are unwilling to try to put themselves in the shoes of others.

  • @singinginsominac2647
    @singinginsominac2647 2 роки тому +1

    This happened to me as well, and I am in America

  • @ronalddowdell9231
    @ronalddowdell9231 5 місяців тому

    I thought forced marriages were a thing of the past..... didn't know they were still happening.

  • @eduzulu494
    @eduzulu494 2 роки тому +1

    North Carolina via Cabo Verde Islands

  • @crnkmnky
    @crnkmnky 2 роки тому +1

    It seems Kazeem in the live chat is desperate for advice in how to force abxxtion upon a sidechick. 🙄

  • @brandyrama1
    @brandyrama1 2 роки тому

    She should have mentioned it to her midwives during her pregnancy so she have gotten therapy. She could still get therapy and join women emotional support group for victims of DV if she goes to her gp and tell them what she is passing thru.

  • @Oyzatt
    @Oyzatt 2 роки тому +2

    People stay in toxic relationship and they accept it. And it has to do with what others will say, and another is sunk cost, as humans we stick to something special if we put much time and effort into getting that thing. And money and time has magnified how we think of sunk cost

  • @bluecole2
    @bluecole2 2 роки тому +3

    The world is changing and so must we. There's no excuse for both sexes not supporting each other in a union or relationship. A lot of people left this toxic culture back home but refuse to change there ways.

  • @bunnyman9252
    @bunnyman9252 2 роки тому +2

    Mr Phrankleen, I respected you a lot but before we conclude we need to hear from others parts, because sometimes partners opinions and understanding in that union might be different.

  • @margyiphillips4931
    @margyiphillips4931 2 роки тому +1

    [Thumb in my mouth] Fiankyin, I was close to my dadi....Nyen Nyen Nyen

  • @justgbali4293
    @justgbali4293 2 роки тому +12

    By the way, in western society, there is no "shame" in getting pregnant before getting married (I'm not saying it's the right thing). It happens and it's not the end of the world. Also if you don't want "shame" maybe you should teach your children how to be an adult. It's this kinda mindset that makes me want to run away from Nigeria😑

    • @datingwithdarren5063
      @datingwithdarren5063 2 роки тому +4

      Very true, and many westerners don't want to get married anyways.

    • @kingamar8780
      @kingamar8780 2 роки тому +2

      As Africans we cannot continue to run 🏃🏾‍♂️ away from our societal issues - we must stand & fix it.

    • @Oyzatt
      @Oyzatt 2 роки тому

      Bro don't go anywhere, stay strong whenever you're

    • @tombimashri8149
      @tombimashri8149 2 роки тому

      @@datingwithdarren5063 It's their choice they hv their reasons, those who choose to marry should first study what marriage means ND entails than if you can be a good Dad/mother to your children Go ahead ND hv children. Pointless having these elaborate weddings just to please Mom ND Dad (show off) when in essence you not ready to handle all the responsibility's marriage ND child u bringing takes me

  • @Fuorunner
    @Fuorunner 2 роки тому

    Phrankleen I'm not with you on this one. We have to stop this baby MoMA and baby fathers nonsense we have in our communities. This African solution go a long way to reduce the fallout from the baby daddy syndrome. Do you see the young ladies selling pure water small, minute hand to make Hawking to feed baby. The boys parents did well. The other issues with the husband is another matter.

  • @echooscar1914
    @echooscar1914 2 місяці тому

    They were too young to get married. Both couple lacked the maturity to stay in a marriage. Honestly the things our African parents do is nothing but utter nonsense in the name of Religion and reputation in the eyes of the society. I weep for our parents and the kind of decisions they make. Why will a parent enable toxicity all in the name of staying married? Doesn’t make any sense to me. You don’t derive relevance from marriage.

  • @danielademide
    @danielademide 2 роки тому

    There are always two sides to a story. I believe this man is the devil himself and she’s a saint. However, I want to hear his version.

    • @Phrankleen13
      @Phrankleen13  2 роки тому

      🤔 he’s the devil…. How???

    • @danielademide
      @danielademide 2 роки тому

      @@Phrankleen13 - that’s sarcasm. My key points are in the first and last sentences.
      BTW - love your show and what you do.