Blaming a Child Victim for Sexual Abuse

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  • Опубліковано 25 лис 2024

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  • @SweetPea1993
    @SweetPea1993 3 місяці тому +3666

    That wasn’t an adult standing there talking, that was a four-year-old little girl who had been hurt in such a horrendous way and then betrayed by her mother who was supposed to protect her, finally finding her voice after so long.

    • @dlinfrost
      @dlinfrost 3 місяці тому +129

      I wanted so badly to give her a hug and cheer her on, tell her good job. That is so heartbreaking.

    • @Floorborade
      @Floorborade 3 місяці тому +43

      @@dlinfrostshe’s so brave

    • @Americanamaya
      @Americanamaya 3 місяці тому +35

      The mother left the child like that?!?! THATS NOT MOTHER let alone a actually good one or even ONE AT ALL

    • @AngelDragon448
      @AngelDragon448 2 місяці тому +7

      Poor girl I feel bad because I was in her shoes once and I know how it is to not feel safe or who to trust let alone to find your voice after so long 🫂🫂🌹🌹

    • @JustAJinx-ci6hg
      @JustAJinx-ci6hg 2 місяці тому +4

      The thumbnail alone told me everything i needed to know about the Blob

  • @EverettNightshade
    @EverettNightshade 5 місяців тому +3169

    NEVER blame a child victim for sexual abuse. People who have been abused by their abusers don't wish to see them.

    • @asill.6668
      @asill.6668 4 місяці тому +113

      Exactly! My older brother abused me when I was a child. My mom knew about it and didn't care. So I dont deal with either one of them.

    • @poshgaming900
      @poshgaming900 3 місяці тому +2

      my cut off for caring is 15-16 depending on if they're actually innocent, i seen some shit and just stop assuming they diddnt lie about their age

    • @bambichocbon
      @bambichocbon 3 місяці тому +125

      @@poshgaming90015-16 is still a child and ultimately the person who is supposed to check the age is the adult. Ask for ids, birth certificate whatever. But the truth is most don’t ask because they want to be with children. Also kids give away tells that they are children. But most don’t care it’s about s3x and they pretend innocence when caught.

    • @pacipwincess
      @pacipwincess 3 місяці тому +112

      @@poshgaming900 thats vile of you. Those ages are children, as an adult its your duty to be responsible and ask for ID. 15yos act like kids so dont even.

    • @JakNasty69
      @JakNasty69 3 місяці тому +2

      ​@@poshgaming900Teenagers may do stupid shit sometimes and may want to do things but it's up to adults to make sure nothing happens it's not okay for 15-16 year olds to be with adults regardless if they start it or not, be an adult and say no and tell them it's not okay and leave the conversation you saying you don't care what happens to teenagers just because they "might not be innocent" is scary and it should concern other people as well

  • @PythiaHiereia
    @PythiaHiereia 4 місяці тому +2244

    Telling the whole country her daughter's old street name when it doesn't pertain to anything tells me EVERYTHING.

    • @florpleborp2275
      @florpleborp2275 3 місяці тому +243

      God doesn’t it? She just wanted her child to feel *shame,* to be too embarrassed to be honest with others and say her mother failed her. Mothers like that ALWAYS care more about their image than their babiesb

    • @Juliet_Capulet
      @Juliet_Capulet 2 місяці тому +31

      @@florpleborp2275 This. That's how complicit people in abuse situations get the victim to shut up.

    • @vc6218
      @vc6218 2 місяці тому +32

      BINGO. All these cameras and ish.. wanted to humiliate her. Her momma aint shit.

    • @wintersolstice4250
      @wintersolstice4250 2 місяці тому +15

      I said the same thing! It pissed me off so bad. She’s a disgusting mother.

    • @meganfuller8306
      @meganfuller8306 2 місяці тому +6

      None of this has anything to do with the actual loan/case.

  • @jahnapanui6532
    @jahnapanui6532 4 місяці тому +2260

    I was molested by a uncle who molested me from 4 years old till I was 13 and was strong enough to fight him off I told my mother she didn’t do nothing and still had him around me I too ended up with a drug addiction for 22 years later and today I’m 4 years clean I totally understand and relate to this woman on so many levels I’m in tears 😢

    • @feuilletoniste
      @feuilletoniste 4 місяці тому +99

      I am so sorry that you were put through all of that by people who should have loved and protected you. And I am so incredibly proud of you for working through things, and getting clean and staying clean. You are strong, you are beautiful, and you deserve to have a good life. Sending you love and light from afar! ❤

    • @cynthiaholland13
      @cynthiaholland13 3 місяці тому +62

      Congratulations on being clean, boo. Keep pushing!!

    • @RhaenysT
      @RhaenysT 3 місяці тому +4

      When I told my mother about my father SAing me her response was to "I'm going to ask him " if he did . Then I reported it to the police and she told them I have schizophrenia ( I don't) and hallucinated it. People would rather blame a child than see the truth. It's disgusting.

    • @RhaenysT
      @RhaenysT 3 місяці тому

      Congrats on sobriety 🎉

    • @onelovealways527
      @onelovealways527 3 місяці тому +36

      Hugs to you!! I'm sorry you had to go through that

  • @giggles2302
    @giggles2302 Рік тому +4970

    When mom said her daughter must've liked it, it was the 4 year old baby girl who read that, who felt that. That 4 year old innocent baby girl was betrayed all over again. I feel so bad for Ms Elam. I hope she felt vindicated after this trial, and I hope she's being cared for and loved as she deserves to be.

    • @user-pt1cz4ot1e
      @user-pt1cz4ot1e 9 місяців тому +137

      100%. My heart broke every second of this case.

    • @francostevo9939
      @francostevo9939 9 місяців тому +80

      ⁠@@user-pt1cz4ot1eI don’t get it! I hear people say the victims who are teens, people say that they probably wanted it. That I can get by despite how gross it is but a 4 YEAR OLD???!!!!! HOW DOES A 4 YEAR OLD WANT IT??!!

    • @foxbuns
      @foxbuns 9 місяців тому +180

      ​@@francostevo9939maybe dont "get by" any victim "asking for it". if they are a victim they did not "ask for it", it was done to them by force.

    • @francostevo9939
      @francostevo9939 9 місяців тому

      @@foxbuns there are some teens who like that some who don’t. I know when I was 16 and wanted to get involved with an older woman and had fantasies about my teacher. I know a 13 year old who wanted to commit suicide because a 27 year old got drunk and sexual assaulted the poor guy; that boy clearly didn’t want that.
      Teens who are victimized like that are victims, teens who always fantasize always wish they got down with it with an older person but it is still illegal. A 4 year old doesn’t want it!!! A child that young doesn’t think about such things nor want it. A child is always thinking what they want to do at that moment; what they want to eat now, what are they going to do now, what show am I gonna watch now. A child that age doesn’t have urges that they would “want” something like that! She was 4; she didn’t want it!

    • @yonagranger8999
      @yonagranger8999 9 місяців тому

      so you're saying older people "want it"? that's sick and disgusting. How can you ever justify sexual abuse.@@francostevo9939

  • @AlexRising_
    @AlexRising_ 4 місяці тому +1344

    The dude who said “thank you!” when the judge told her to shut up is the voice of the people

    • @nobodyanon
      @nobodyanon 3 місяці тому +26

      Sincerely.

    • @isheenahblake8443
      @isheenahblake8443 3 місяці тому +43

      I literally started giggling when I heard that cus he’s so real 😂😂😂

    • @SithBunny1
      @SithBunny1 2 місяці тому +12

      Truth

    • @Bingbangxox
      @Bingbangxox 2 місяці тому +3

      I didn’t even hear it until you said something 🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @each6002
      @each6002 2 місяці тому +8

      The waaaay I just laughed. We, the People, indeed.
      We know who we are.

  • @Ash-ol3ji
    @Ash-ol3ji Рік тому +10705

    I love how the mom brought this to national television to humiliate her daughter only to be exposed as a despicable person.

  • @MzNoir_Rain444
    @MzNoir_Rain444 9 місяців тому +3434

    She allowed her daughter to be abused because having to deal with the abuse would’ve been an inconvenience to her life. What a despicable human. I’d scorch earth if anyone had ever but a hand on my child.

    • @stefaniacontessa
      @stefaniacontessa 9 місяців тому +39

      My mom is the same.

    • @princepayne4262
      @princepayne4262 9 місяців тому +40

      @@stefaniacontessaI hope you’re doing it okay Chico(a) it’s not fair that anyone had to go through this. I hope your life is going good people’s who’s parents were negligent genuinely deserves the best life.

    • @Vero2yu
      @Vero2yu 9 місяців тому +28

      I suggest you replace the word ''human'' with creature or monster, both words would be valid, say despicable creature or despicable monster. Why could you not say that? Creatures like those should never be called ''human, woman, man'' so try and understand such basic sense facts.

    • @tinajackson6875
      @tinajackson6875 8 місяців тому +10

      Me to, trifling mother

    • @asill.6668
      @asill.6668 4 місяці тому +1

      ​@stefaniacontessa My mom is like this too.

  • @hollywarehouse4606
    @hollywarehouse4606 10 місяців тому +2803

    Best last words EVER…. “Screw you”… from the daughter as she walked away with her head held high! 🙌🏽

    • @stefaniacontessa
      @stefaniacontessa 9 місяців тому +51

      THAT’S RIGHT

    • @natnaelberhanu-i8w
      @natnaelberhanu-i8w 6 місяців тому +29

      I think she wanted to say something more harsh than screw but it was on National tv

    • @asill.6668
      @asill.6668 4 місяці тому +7

      👌👌👌

    • @each6002
      @each6002 2 місяці тому +2

      That was honestly my favorite moment. When her mom starts talking you can see something rocks her body back, and her head high, and in a completely different tone then she used the whole trial, she stood up, for herself, spoke her piece and bounced.
      She's Free. I saw it. That was beautiful.

    • @tonimattox6976
      @tonimattox6976 2 місяці тому

      🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

  • @jpousson
    @jpousson 9 місяців тому +3786

    That SHUT UP was from literally ALL OF US. What a precious daughter that monster was given. I'm so glad she's free now.

    • @rhondah.1478
      @rhondah.1478 4 місяці тому +242

      And the man in the background who said "thank you!" when Judge said it! Loved it!

    • @AlexRising_
      @AlexRising_ 4 місяці тому +133

      @@rhondah.1478you could tell that came from someone whose blood had been BOILING

    • @thursdaygrape
      @thursdaygrape 3 місяці тому

      Mathis don't play....especially with NARCISSISTIC NUTBAGS!!

    • @lunavz8433
      @lunavz8433 3 місяці тому +33

      ​@@AlexRising_ honestly im sure everyone would be raging! I cant express how angry i got when the mother was speaking.

    • @Magix210
      @Magix210 3 місяці тому +5

      Thank you for this comment.

  • @Lizziestewart-j1i
    @Lizziestewart-j1i Рік тому +5272

    The mother was quick to point out her daughters failures but failed not address the damage and how she destroyed her own child by her actions. Disgusting woman.

    • @paralegalkc
      @paralegalkc Рік тому +57

      Exactly!!!!!

    • @ShayDarkskin
      @ShayDarkskin Рік тому +116

      Exactly!!! It’s her fault her daughter turned to drugs

    • @GrumpySmurf0813
      @GrumpySmurf0813 Рік тому +71

      That's what people do. They tell what the other person does but not what they do. It's crazy how people do that.

    • @reddisimmo
      @reddisimmo Рік тому +32

      How the mother could see the speck in her daughters eyes while there was a redwood tree blacking hers is just wondrous!

    • @ebonypriester8691
      @ebonypriester8691 10 місяців тому +39

      Shes still 4 yrs old, Lord heal her please

  • @yildendelta6761
    @yildendelta6761 9 місяців тому +1377

    How parents react when a child tells them about sa is vital to the child's mental well being. I was molested at 4 by a cousin, I told my mom who told my dad and the crap hit the fan. While the butt kicking was going on, my mother held me and rocked me all the while soothing my little mind that none of this was my fault and answering all the questions I had. My dad talked to me later reassuring me again that I was not to blame and had done the right thing in telling them. As a result of the way they handled it I was not scared and felt no guilt in my cousin getting in trouble, when I got older I realized that by them believing me and tearing into him, I got justice and it has not haunted me. The truth is I hardly ever thought about it in the 60 years since it happened, all because of my parents. This story just reminded me of if and made me realize just how lucky I was to have the parents I had.

    • @tinajackson6875
      @tinajackson6875 8 місяців тому +96

      You truly was blessed forget luck, you was soothed after the assault so it couldn't haunt you, I can't even imagine what these poor children feel. Thank God Judge told her to "Shut up"

    • @Staceyfry1991
      @Staceyfry1991 6 місяців тому +9

      What Ever Happened To The Cousin If You Don't Mind Me Asking.

    • @lisaliberty8054
      @lisaliberty8054 5 місяців тому +2

      Amen

    • @teeeteee000
      @teeeteee000 4 місяці тому +7

      Bless your parents. ❤

    • @yildendelta6761
      @yildendelta6761 4 місяці тому +67

      Thank you all for your kind responses. As for my cousin, well at first my aunt didn't believe he darling "baby boy" (he was 16) would that but my parents, especially my dad whose sister she was, got in her face and forced her to call him in. When he came in my dad didn't hesitate, he told him that they knew what had happened and that he was going to take him outside and teach him a few lessons. All I remember after that was a whole lot of yelling, dad threatening to call the police and my cousin on his knees crying and begging my dad not to. After that he never bothered me again.

  • @novembrluv
    @novembrluv Рік тому +8144

    Defendant's spirit is still 4 years old. When she expresses herself, I can picture exactly how she tried to tell her mom when she was a baby. My heart is breaking. I want to hug her and tell her, it's going to be ok.
    Edit: My most liked comment on UA-cam. It's terrible it's for such a case as this, but I am glad so many can sympathize with the pain of this woman. May God be with us all 🙏🏾

    • @ariamarshall5161
      @ariamarshall5161 Рік тому +460

      EXACTLY what I said…! That was a 4yo baby standing there. Incredibly sad! Wow. My heartbreaks for so many innocent children & adults who were violated as children.

    • @1LovedbyHim
      @1LovedbyHim Рік тому +221

      Wow! That’s what I said also. It shows that healing hasn’t taken place…understandably so. She’s still stuck back in the time of those awful and traumatic experiences. I wish I could hug her also!

    • @trinidazzling684
      @trinidazzling684 Рік тому +44

      So true.

    • @IagainstI.
      @IagainstI. Рік тому +194

      Having a mother that has invalidated her for her whole life keeps her stuck in that place. Poor baby.

    • @kayamen2021
      @kayamen2021 Рік тому +96

      Amen 🙏🏼 her mom probably a narcissist.
      They are emotionless and they are good actors

  • @meicolar1724
    @meicolar1724 Рік тому +3202

    Unless you are a victim...no one can truly understand the impact of being sexually violated and then SILENCED by those who are to protect you. You fight demons internally constantly and are traumatized by the slightest triggers. We learn to survive. Some people have a hard time moving from that point.
    I felt her pain in every part of my being.
    Her mom is out of order. She planted those seeds that GREW...
    I pray she heals completely.

    • @ladymary9794
      @ladymary9794 11 місяців тому +20

      Preech!

    • @LiLi-ow8xi
      @LiLi-ow8xi 10 місяців тому +18

      Well said

    • @ItsSlimK
      @ItsSlimK 10 місяців тому +13

      ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

    • @lisasangria1086
      @lisasangria1086 10 місяців тому +54

      TOTALLY agree!!! I was molested by my male cousin at the age of 8 and then by a female friend of the family at the age of 10. When I told my grandmother about my cousin (since I was at her house when it happened), she said that perhaps he was trying wrestling moves on me?!??!!! Umm noooo!!!!!!!!!!!! When I told my parents about the female friend, I never heard back about what they said or did. It's something that NEVER goes away. I am 50 and it still fxxks with me!!!

    • @queeniemomma
      @queeniemomma 10 місяців тому +11

      ❤beautifully said.

  • @JewelWildmoon
    @JewelWildmoon 9 місяців тому +1221

    "This is my daughter, who I love dearly."
    The audacity to say that when your first response to your 4 year old daughter coming to you about CSA was to hurt her 💀

    • @grapeyv
      @grapeyv 3 місяці тому +27

      Narcissistic women who let their kids experience abuse are like this. My mum always said she loved me so much but I can’t let go how she used to beat my siblings and I. How tf you gonna beat a 3 year old till he bleeds? I was about 9 years old then, and that’s when I decided I wanted to take my brother with me whenever I grew up old enough to move out. Fortunately DSS wedged themselves in there to take my siblings and I away from my mum and I was so glad. The physical abuse finally stopped but the verbal abuse didnt. Legit when I was 13 and I was on visitation with my mum she was about to break her agreement contract by allowing my sister to sleep over her friend’s house. She begged me to not tell my father but I don’t tell lies and I wasn’t taking her shit. I told her I’m not gonna lie to him. She freaked out so hard she literally threw a tantrum. I’m half her age she had me at 15 years old, she really showed how childish she was then and there. On the car ride home while she was angry driving (she drives erratically while angry) she suddenly stopped the car and told me in front of my siblings and her fwb (she has always had tons of those since before I was born and still now, that’s 23 years of cheating which is why my father left her 13 years ago) that she gets rid of people who go against her (paraphrasing cuz don’t rember exact words). And knowing this woman I’m thinking she probably means she kills them. Cuz she spent like half or most my life telling us she wished she never had kids, she wished she could sell us on eBay, on the internet, tryna sell us on the streets yelling “kids for sale buy 1 get 2 free” or whatever even if it sounded funny she legit DIDNT wanna raise us. She’d spend all day sleeping after smoking some weed and sometimes she’d wake up too late to pick my sister and up from school she’d call my father and make him do it so we’d be waiting at the school for like an hour. Don’t even get me started on the false autism diagnosis. I actually have ptsd and a little bit of age regression but my mum believed it was autism because of the school who witnessed my tantrums, aggression, and I literally cried out that she would beat me if she saw my poor grades one time and my teacher told me “that’s not my problem, you should’ve gotten better grades”. Fuck you 2nd grade teacher you’re part of the reason why I have these issues. I don’t even like to swear this is just how worked up it gets me.
      Imagine doing these things to ur kids and still saying “I love you so much” and acting like you’ll die if anything slightly wrong happens to them like 10 years later
      Woman you ruined me
      But whatever, God says to honor my mother and father so that’s what I’ll do. I have to learn to let go of this drudge or I’ll never make it to heaven. My faith in the Lord is what kept me sane and alive. He knows how many times I wanted to kill myself before I turned 13. And then the aftermath of her over feeding us in exchange for raising us I’m still struggling with weight. The bullying I got in middle school made me wanna kill myself too. But I’m glad I didnt because now I’m getting married to the most wonderful man ever in 18 days. I just feel so insecure thinking I’m too childish with my age regression and ptsd and that he doesn’t deserve a fat wife but somehow he’s all up on me like dogs over fresh meat. I also wanted to be 60 lbs less for my wedding but whatever, things happen that make you gain all the weight you lost. Now I gotta start over AND I won’t like how I look at my wedding. I had to get a size 4xl dress and it was STILL too small. My regular size is 3xl and before that it was 1xl 2 years ago when I had lost weight. Frick I could’ve even fit into a regular xl.
      So yeah an abusive mother who lied about “loving me dearly” ruined my life

    • @vermilliongecko
      @vermilliongecko 3 місяці тому +6

      ​@@grapeyvI'm so sorry for everything that happened to you. I just want you to know that being a Christian does not mean that you have to be okay with what your mother did to you. I'm not going to tell you that you have to forgive your mom. But you absolutely have the right to protect yourself, now and in the future, from anything that she might say or do, and if that means no contact, restraining order etc, then I'm sure God will give you His blessing. Honouring your mother doesn't mean honouring the appalling childhood she gave you. I wish you peace.

    • @deetrisray421
      @deetrisray421 3 місяці тому +1

      ​@@grapeyvI wish for the best for u sweetheart and pray that you experience nothing but love and happiness. Congrats on ur wedding/ marriage. You got this hun🤞🏾💪🏾💯🥰

    • @ShannonAdams-d1s
      @ShannonAdams-d1s 3 місяці тому +2

      ​@@grapeyvI'm so sorry

  • @carleebhoward1
    @carleebhoward1 Рік тому +4264

    When he told the mom “shut up” my day was made!!! She’s an awful person smh

    • @kayshawnsimmons5585
      @kayshawnsimmons5585 Рік тому +72

      Moms like this is sadly common

    • @amaliomar
      @amaliomar Рік тому

      Begging ass people are always trying to vilify the very people they ran to for help. Her and her husband had no one else and somehow she's the bad guy. FOH

    • @notfromchina
      @notfromchina Рік тому +172

      That “THANK YOU” in the background was loud!

    • @diamondbrown5811
      @diamondbrown5811 Рік тому +49

      @@notfromchina lol I was wondering if anybody else heard that , that brother felt that !

    • @pressedbypebbles
      @pressedbypebbles Рік тому +32

      Yes this episode was very triggering. My mom did the same thing and swears nobody ever told her anything …. I tried and got fussed at and called a liar and dragged for always making stuff up until things hit the fan after I left the house :(

  • @Ash-ol3ji
    @Ash-ol3ji Рік тому +5956

    The mom is disgusting. I believe she beat her daughter to silence her from exposing the abuse. It's sickening how some parents normalize and perpetuate abuse rather than break the cycle. Prayers up for the daughter and all childhood trauma survivors.

    • @gospel4303
      @gospel4303 Рік тому +204

      Exactly! The mom is a HORRIBLE person. Her attempt to degrade her daughter backfired. She ruined her daughter’s life. I’m happy she was able to kick her addiction. The mom probably turned her children against her as well

    • @frankmiller6177
      @frankmiller6177 Рік тому

      I agree straight garbage of a mother.. how you smiling when your daughter is saying she's been malistied.

    • @Orlandoloc83
      @Orlandoloc83 Рік тому +16

      U believe a beating makes sense smh 🤦‍♂️ yah people will believe anything

    • @Orlandoloc83
      @Orlandoloc83 Рік тому

      Her plan all alone was to keep that 5k lml mom got out hustle by a ex crack head lml

    • @marlayneboblett1267
      @marlayneboblett1267 Рік тому +82

      I totally agree. No mother in her right mind would ever tell their child they must have enjoyed sexual abuse. As a Judge, I would not make that woman pay a dime to her mother.

  • @onnie.6815
    @onnie.6815 4 місяці тому +381

    How do you manage to have a SMILE on your face when someone is talking about being molested? Especially when that person is your own child….?????

    • @AD-wi4fq
      @AD-wi4fq 3 місяці тому +18

      Personality disorders.

    • @each6002
      @each6002 2 місяці тому

      Dupers delight too maybe. "Hahaha see your honor? She's crazy!" I think she was trying to pull one of those.

  • @3ch1dna07
    @3ch1dna07 10 місяців тому +1897

    When that poor woman was talking about the abuse, I knew she was telling the truth because I experienced the same thing. When a family member sexually abused me when I was 4, my mom slapped me across the face and told me to quit lying. I never went to her again when I needed her. I'm now 51 years old and I know that my mom is NOT someone I can rely on. The same goes for several members of my family because when they found out what happened, their response was, "Get over it already." My heart breaks for that woman! I really wish I could hug her because I am one of those few people who really knows what she has been and is going through.

    • @hannibalspectre637
      @hannibalspectre637 9 місяців тому +72

      I’m so sorry that happened to you. I wish you nothing but the best for the rest of your life. Sending love.

    • @carolwilliams8840
      @carolwilliams8840 9 місяців тому +31

      I'm so sorry for the terrible experiences you went through. I hope that you will completely heal emotionally.

    • @ghostkid252
      @ghostkid252 9 місяців тому +57

      I'm sorry, friend.
      When I was little, my dad and mom split but because I was an ill child, a judge placed me in the care of my paternal grandparents. My dad went on to meet a new woman and he had three kids by her, two of them were my sisters who were molested by my grandpa (that I was living with). When my dad and step mom found out, they never brought my sisters to that house again stating "no child of mine will ever see that man again".
      ...but they left me there. I was molested for years by the man and beaten physically to the point I slept under my bed most nights just to feel protected. I went no contact with my dad and step mom and have been trying different therapists. Thankfully, I have a great relationship with one of my sisters as well as a number of friends I consider my family.
      It really sucks when parents aren't parents, especially in the years we develop the most in. In our early years, we're objectified and hurt, then we have to spend the rest of our lives trying to undo the damage.

    • @3ch1dna07
      @3ch1dna07 9 місяців тому +30

      @@ghostkid252 I want you to know that I see you and I love and care about you. We are better than those who raised us. Never forget that.❤️

    • @thesugaraddict3160
      @thesugaraddict3160 9 місяців тому +17

      You don't talk to them anymore right? Cause they all sound awful.

  • @MunchiieXO
    @MunchiieXO Рік тому +1072

    This is all too common.
    I was r*ped and m*lested when I was six through to about 10 when my mother got a divorce and started an affair with another man who also r*ped me 11 through 17/18.
    My mom kicked me out at 17 and I had no where to go so I went to the second ones house. He told me to keep it secret, then told my mom years later I came on to him and “tried” him.
    She believes him. Brought him to my resident and told him to his face she doesn’t believe me.
    I haven’t spoken to my mother in 3 years and will continue to not speak to her for the rest of my life.

    • @Jenny-uv4dl
      @Jenny-uv4dl Рік тому +89

      I'm so sorry some of same things happened to me I hope you begin your recovery I haven't spoken to my moms in 12yrs good to you for STANDING UP

    • @latasha195
      @latasha195 Рік тому

      Wow that's so horrible and sickening! I'm so sorry you're going through that! I'm praying for a healing and do not blame you for not speaking to your disgusting and evil mother who chose men over you!

    • @ylp3able
      @ylp3able Рік тому +47

      I'm so sorry this happened to you 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

    • @ibabechanel
      @ibabechanel Рік тому +41

      I shed tears at your comment. Love, hugs, peace, blessings, prosperity, security, continuous hope and lots of light, ease of living I send your way. 🫂🫂🫂🫂💞💞💞🍀🍀🍀

    • @youngreap1564
      @youngreap1564 Рік тому +40

      I’m sorry baby girl. I hope you can heal baby. It’s unfortunate that your mom was attracting those type of people that says a lot about herself

  • @Lilbadtrinibih
    @Lilbadtrinibih 9 місяців тому +1391

    Funny how mom was so loud about her daughters faults but didn't say once she is a business owner and sober 13 years I don't know you my love BUT I AM PROUD OF YOU AND YOU GOT THIS 😘CONTINUE TO WALK IN YOUR TRUTH GOD HAS YOUR BACK!!!!!!!

    • @kuroichan101
      @kuroichan101 8 місяців тому +103

      Exactly the mom didnt even applaud her. 13 years sober and a whole business owner is amazing. The mom just wants to bring her down. She must be jealous

    • @goingferalluvs
      @goingferalluvs 6 місяців тому +56

      Yep, that woman came with an entire prepared written story about her daughters life of drugs that didn't seem to have anything to do what she was here for or explain the connection. What do her babies have to do with her taking a loan out and not paying it back?

    • @JoltYourLife
      @JoltYourLife 5 місяців тому +14

      Women turn away from their own kids bc they never saw themselves as worthy enough to be helped when they were in the same situation . That mother will probably die never getting help and her broken soul will recycle into another person that hopefully will be seen

    • @onnie.6815
      @onnie.6815 4 місяці тому +3

      💚💚💚💚

    • @onnie.6815
      @onnie.6815 4 місяці тому +12

      @@goingferalluvsI’m just peeping that; seriously, what does her doing drugs have to do with your loan ? That was a great observation

  • @YAHsaves777
    @YAHsaves777 Рік тому +1169

    If this “mother” was protective over her daughter like she was her money the daughter would be a well adjusted adult.

    • @kakishisfriend1126
      @kakishisfriend1126 Рік тому +70

      Right! Cared way more about rhat money than her own child

    • @cleverB634
      @cleverB634 Рік тому +7

      Amen

    • @stefaniacontessa
      @stefaniacontessa 9 місяців тому +4

      AMEN

    • @lyndelljones5483
      @lyndelljones5483 7 місяців тому +1

      Tell it!!!

    • @jamiehendrix8657
      @jamiehendrix8657 5 місяців тому +4

      EXACTLY!!! She should've made sure her child left this world the way she came. Just like she wanted her money the way she gave it!!

  • @Luckymeee555
    @Luckymeee555 Рік тому +2525

    My heart broke for the defendant. She’s still 4 years old at heart. Omg the trauma. She’s traumatized. 😢

    • @101candlelight6
      @101candlelight6 Рік тому +34

      Mine too, so sad, I hope she will get the help she need

    • @keeper6458
      @keeper6458 Рік тому +20

      Absolutely! God bless her

    • @sobrietygiveslife9181
      @sobrietygiveslife9181 Рік тому +40

      I pray she gets to heal her inner child so she can be the woman she's meant to be

    • @tvc153
      @tvc153 Рік тому +22

      Great comment. It's true. She even communicates like a little girl.

    • @xopinkieox
      @xopinkieox 9 місяців тому +39

      Whats crazy is that this entire comment section of this video has more respect and love for that young woman than her own mother does. Her mom is awful and i hope she got that restraining order

  • @queenaqueena5803
    @queenaqueena5803 5 місяців тому +162

    That's the lowest thing to do to a abuse victim.

    • @poshgaming900
      @poshgaming900 3 місяці тому +9

      trust me, ik lower. (not personal) the stories people have are just wild

  • @kathyclaudiochandler
    @kathyclaudiochandler Рік тому +1210

    That’s exactly why when I hear people say, “but that’s your mother and you need to honor her…” most have not walked that daughter’s life and have no business judging her. There are plenty of mothers that should not have been mothers and she is the prime example.

    • @cocobernard6634
      @cocobernard6634 Рік тому +23

      Facts I agree

    • @ibabechanel
      @ibabechanel Рік тому +20

      EXACTLY.

    • @pammays7800
      @pammays7800 10 місяців тому +16

      Well said.

    • @CHT420
      @CHT420 10 місяців тому +32

      My mother should never have been a mother‼️

    • @annc6306
      @annc6306 10 місяців тому +38

      You are Soo right. Many mother's take their unresolved anger, hurt and pain out on their children unapologetically. I know about this kinda mother all too well.

  • @dloveman
    @dloveman Рік тому +2048

    I thank God for my mother and father. I was a child victim. He (the predator) sat his ass in jail for over 30 years.

    • @supremeclientele1356
      @supremeclientele1356 Рік тому +111

      Blessings to you & your family 🙌🏾🙏🏾

    • @dloveman
      @dloveman Рік тому +133

      I appreciate it and my family. My parents made sure that received therapeutic help.

    • @jenaewhite5869
      @jenaewhite5869 Рік тому +60

      I wish I could have told my family then, I know he’d be 6 ft under 😅 but I’m so happy you were able to get justice and the help you needed after 🫶🏾💕

    • @bezmoney
      @bezmoney Рік тому +30

      God Bless You And Nothing But Success & Prosperity Moving Forward

    • @ShannonSoSweeet
      @ShannonSoSweeet Рік тому +13

      @@dloveman hi, do you feel like the therapy worked?

  • @lovefromwonderland
    @lovefromwonderland 5 місяців тому +332

    When your child is telling you they are being abused, you BELIEVE them. If they’re proven wrong they’re proven wrong. But if you’re not there for them when they need you they will never forget that.

    • @josephatherley86
      @josephatherley86 4 місяці тому +9

      That's why most of them are in homes, hospital or some other institutions.Life is a cycle, this is a reminder,what goes around comes around.

    • @Starmadien2019
      @Starmadien2019 3 місяці тому

      My mom was never there for me, except for to force me to forgive the boy and be the better person. She never protected me. She made me stay his friend.

  • @1234532785
    @1234532785 Рік тому +1429

    JM was VERY justified in handling that sorry excuse of a “mother” like he did. To see the daughter’s pain and brokenness really tugged at my heart. I hope she heals and stays far away from that evil WITCH!!!

    • @maryone9587
      @maryone9587 Рік тому

      The daughter is psycho and knows how to put on a good show!!!!

    • @jacquelinewright5985
      @jacquelinewright5985 Рік тому +8

      I agree

    • @Imissyoulou
      @Imissyoulou Рік тому +8

      THAT IS THE KEY: STAY AWAY. This is why I am so grateful, for my extended family.

    • @rondaallen7211
      @rondaallen7211 Рік тому

      he wasn't right. sitting on the bench is supposed to mean being more objective.

    • @UncleDuTheWatchman
      @UncleDuTheWatchman Рік тому +34

      ​@@rondaallen7211 Objective about a woman blaming her daughter for being abused? What would be a more objective view of this?

  • @tinagoodwin3571
    @tinagoodwin3571 Рік тому +565

    Imagine being 4 years old, running to "mama" for help and then not understanding why you are being beaten with an extension cord. That baby cried and danced around, trying to avoid being hit and wondering what she did wrong.

    • @Nightlingg
      @Nightlingg 4 місяці тому +42

      It makes me tear up just thinking about that....

    • @kmsleyang1980
      @kmsleyang1980 4 місяці тому +46

      Sis you painted that horrifying picture perfectly.

  • @Seevawonderloaf
    @Seevawonderloaf 9 місяців тому +97

    The judge yelled bc he Just lost it. What a dispicable ‘mother’. How horrible. I hope this sweet lady gets help and big kudos to the judge for seeing it

    • @jerjorju
      @jerjorju Місяць тому

      I thought it took judge Mathis a long time to get angry. I didn't like how he was cutting off the daughter when she was getting emotional.

  • @iamdiamondtv
    @iamdiamondtv Рік тому +1267

    This broke my heart. At the end the mom says "she tried to pay me so I can drop my case" That goes to show you she wanted to go on TV to humiliate her daughter but little did she know she was humiliating herself! She's evil! Whether or not her daughter went somewhere willingly doesn't mean you can't get hurt. She's an idiot!

    • @schoolgirlsp5142
      @schoolgirlsp5142 Рік тому +22

      Sadly some Mothers blame the child when their boy got abused the child my Mom blamed me not my Dad

    • @iamdiamondtv
      @iamdiamondtv Рік тому +15

      @@schoolgirlsp5142 That's sad! I'm sorry you had to go through that smh. I pray you are stronger than your circumstances and you break the cycles of your family. I am breaking them now ❤️‍🩹

    • @brennathecatlover4360
      @brennathecatlover4360 Рік тому +11

      I’m sure she abused her too but doesn’t wanna admit it

    • @rayaee
      @rayaee 10 місяців тому +8

      ​@@brennathecatlover4360 That's the only reason somebody would beat their child after hearing something horrible happened to them!

    • @lydialemaster6851
      @lydialemaster6851 9 місяців тому +18

      And her momma was mad that she went to one of her boyfriends. The daughter was on drugs and knew she could get money from this man and probably figured why not after what she had suffered at his hands

  • @briannajon8501
    @briannajon8501 Рік тому +840

    Did anyone else hear someone yell “thank you” when JM told the plaintiff to “shut up” 😭😭

    • @latasha195
      @latasha195 Рік тому +58

      Yes I did! It was kinda low I had to rewind it!

    • @onimandisa7304
      @onimandisa7304 10 місяців тому +63

      That’s the culture. We love to interact and talk back to movies, TV, etc too. 😂 It was so appropriate here even though it was a court. That lady needs to know people see the crazy and dysfunction in her mother and she is not who her mother claims she is.

    • @poshgaming900
      @poshgaming900 3 місяці тому

      @@onimandisa7304 .. again stop trying to put race on everything. we all know u mean black people

    • @each6002
      @each6002 2 місяці тому +1

      I feel like that might have been her husband.

  • @user-pt1cz4ot1e
    @user-pt1cz4ot1e 9 місяців тому +361

    That poor girl. 46 and 4 at the same time. That vile woman destroyed her own child. I hope she didn’t destroy her grandchildren as well. Horrible person. I hope her daughter has a beautiful rest of her life and gets to have good relationships with her own children. She didn’t deserve any of that. I’m so proud of her sobriety.

    • @msmeya5
      @msmeya5 Місяць тому

      Yes! I was saying this in another comment. The birther looking at her child thinking, "She's acting like a child" Yes, she is you studip b¡tch! 🤬Her csa has her stuck as that 4yo victim. You can see it in her body language along with her tears. That infuriated me!! 🤬. The doctor's note said it all! I'm glad Mrs. Elam is healing & leaving that b¡tch behind!

  • @Big_Bake
    @Big_Bake Рік тому +1219

    Even after reading what the doctor said her words did to her daughter, that evil witch couldn't even apologize for what she said.. she just kept doubling down. But that's how our people are of that generation. They don't know how to admit fault. Their idea of healing is inviting you over to get something to eat and acting like nothing ever happened smh

    • @1234532785
      @1234532785 Рік тому +55

      Now that’s a word!!!!

    • @suminahmcfadden4350
      @suminahmcfadden4350 Рік тому +33

      You're so right smh!

    • @tavaresprice
      @tavaresprice Рік тому +21

      Facts times 1000

    • @opulence_prime
      @opulence_prime Рік тому +51

      Some of them just never learned the right tools to cope and have suffered the same abuse. It’s not an excuse. I feel like we have to leave ppl like her to themselves now that we know the damage they can cause.

    • @jamescash887
      @jamescash887 Рік тому +46

      It’s not just black people (if that’s who you were referring to). The older people in my family do this exact thing. Be emotionless and pretend like nothing ever happened. It’s definitely a generational thing that spans (I have to assume) many cultures in America.

  • @SamuelsReview
    @SamuelsReview Рік тому +528

    The whole time she spoke, the mother had such a smug look while her daughter was breaking down crying. 😒

    • @denayanthony8459
      @denayanthony8459 Рік тому +28

      This so heart breaking. You don't tell anyone that, let alone your child. I will keep this daughter in my prayers. That child carrier (not mother) owes her more than $5000. There isn't a dollar amount that can be paid for the trauma that lady went through.

    • @KNByam
      @KNByam Рік тому +12

      Never even told that young lady she loved her.

    • @user-eo1sv5kn4i
      @user-eo1sv5kn4i 10 місяців тому +18

      right? scary. people like her think normal human emotion is a sign of weakness, she thought the judge would hold it against her daughter like she does but didn’t count on him having empathy & understanding

    • @poshgaming900
      @poshgaming900 3 місяці тому +1

      my mom does the same thing, was like seeing her again

    • @SamuelsReview
      @SamuelsReview 3 місяці тому +3

      @@poshgaming900 I hope you're able to free yourself. I had the same situation until I was able to peacefully go No Contact. Took many years of counseling for me to realize who she was and her actual role in my life. If you have people tell you that you only get 1 mom, remember that you only have 1 life. ❤️

  • @rayne4246
    @rayne4246 3 місяці тому +101

    Beaten with an extention cord for being molested is absolutely vile. That woman is no better than the monsters that violated her daughter.
    I wish I couldn't say I relate tho, I was just beaten before I could say anything so there was no trust to begin with. I lost 5 years of my childhood because I didn't have a bond with the person that raised me for 14 years. I hate how common this is.

  • @paulconnelly6560
    @paulconnelly6560 Рік тому +379

    I am a survivor, and turning to drugs and alcohol is common to those who were sexually abused. The pain and memories are what people are trying to numb!

    • @rebeccamartin2399
      @rebeccamartin2399 Рік тому +19

      Yup, I drank for a long time dealing with that. Thank god i quit before my liver and kidney quit on me.

    • @ShesMajickal_
      @ShesMajickal_ 4 місяці тому +8

      That and hypersexuality. I'm a survivor as well. I turned to sex and weed. Black out drinking. Ive been good now for over 15yrs and have been going to therapy . Even on meds. yup

    • @pennyelliott3732
      @pennyelliott3732 4 місяці тому +5

      I did it all, the boozing, the sex, the drugs... thank god I made it out the other side, the first 21 years of my life were hell

    • @josephatherley86
      @josephatherley86 4 місяці тому +4

      Exactly, because they seem to think it's their fault,at such a tender age.So they tried to get it out of their mind.

    • @msmeya5
      @msmeya5 Місяць тому +1

      I'm glad you so are surviving & thriving. 🫂💖 A lot of us can't get out of that cycle of abuse, even if we're the ones adjusting ourselves after being a victim. Blessings to you all. 🫂💖

  • @LakendraScott
    @LakendraScott Рік тому +990

    The saddest thing about this case... This is the REALITY for a lot of us black families. The infamous line "what goes on in this house, stays in this house" whew that line hits HARD... I grew up like this. This NEVER goes away. I don't care how old you get, it doesn't go away, you just learn ways to cope and work through it. My heart breaks for that daughter. I been there, lived it and still live it. But I promised myself to NEVER let my daughter go through it. She's 17 now and I can proudly say she has NEVER lived a minute like I lived growing up!!!!!!

    • @sereneamani1713
      @sereneamani1713 Рік тому +79

      Unfortunately, this is the reality for families of EVERY (and I mean EVERY) ethnicity. I am so glad you survived and provided a love-filled life for your daughter.

    • @ibabechanel
      @ibabechanel Рік тому +32

      Well done for breaking the generational cycle !!!

    • @jessicajones8872
      @jessicajones8872 Рік тому +15

      When my parents said what goes on in the house didn't leave the house she was NOT TALKING ABOUT SEXUAL ABUSE.....NOT MY BLACK MOM👌

    • @LakendraScott
      @LakendraScott Рік тому +42

      @@jessicajones8872 Good for you but it doesn't negate the fact that it does happen in OTHER black families!

    • @BeKind2AllKinds
      @BeKind2AllKinds Рік тому +7

      You are a cycle breaker!!! 👏👏👏

  • @randanime8252
    @randanime8252 9 місяців тому +228

    I could tell how evil this mother was just based on how she was smiling while her daughter is talking about the trauma she endured. It's sickening and frustrating to see someone smiling through all this as if to say "She's acting like a child. This isn't serious."

    • @poshgaming900
      @poshgaming900 3 місяці тому +8

      mine does the same shit istg, i diddnt know more like her existed to THAT degree

    • @msmeya5
      @msmeya5 Місяць тому +1

      Right?! Her facial expression of "She's acting like a child" 😒 Yeah, the daughter is "acting like a child" bcuz she's stuck as that 4yo victim. That's the age regression her doctor wrote in that letter along with the PTSD. The birther is a despicable monster.

  • @RavenManiac74
    @RavenManiac74 Рік тому +430

    I would bet my next 5 paychecks that mom was abused and it was covered up by her mother. She put a man above her child, and by covering it up she became complicit in the abuse, she is a horrible woman. I guarantee you she sits up in church faithfully every Sunday. I hope this young woman continues to get the help she needs and hopefully, she has an excellent support system.

  • @ariamarshall5161
    @ariamarshall5161 Рік тому +609

    I LOVE the way she walked off. TAKE YOUR POWER BACK!!!!!! That woman beat her down for years & as a baby girl trying to tell the person who was suppose to protect her that ppl were hurting her. So glad she was able to tell her story & receive compensation (tho nothing takes away that kind of pain) but she did so good at the end!!!!!!

    • @ibabechanel
      @ibabechanel Рік тому +7

      Yup, she got closure ! 👍👍

    • @queenla227
      @queenla227 10 місяців тому +2

      Her mother is pure evil, and had the nerve to look embarrassed. Nope, you said it, so read it!

    • @Jaiden_Anime_Shuns
      @Jaiden_Anime_Shuns 9 місяців тому

      Always the women who are too ugly for it to happen to them.

    • @Strawberryfreeze3000
      @Strawberryfreeze3000 9 місяців тому +1

      Yassss , she even lean bk with it ..

  • @gem9535
    @gem9535 3 місяці тому +85

    My mother had to disowned my older siblings, her own children, to keep me safe once I told her they SA-ed me. A real mother protects her children, even from each other.

    • @ВаряВетренная
      @ВаряВетренная 3 місяці тому +6

      Wow. One of my older brothers abuses our common youngest sibling daily. Not sexually, but he beats a 8 year old boy, wishes him death, humiliate him, makes him feel guilty and miserable. I even turned to the police because of that. And my mom asks "what can I do", when my older brother is clearly a pure monster, such as his dad btw. I can't even say how much I envy you for having a strong and protective mother

    • @CinnCity78
      @CinnCity78 2 місяці тому

      @@ВаряВетреннаяplease don’t stop trying. Call CPS if you have to. If you’re a minor, tell a teacher or guidance counselor at school.

    • @chillandrelax348
      @chillandrelax348 2 місяці тому

      Please call the police

  • @wizardofahhhhhhz
    @wizardofahhhhhhz Рік тому +417

    The mother is in denial because she knows that she is no better than the person she accuses her daughter of being! You don’t get to ruin your child and then act surprised that they have major issues.

    • @Imissyoulou
      @Imissyoulou Рік тому +20

      That is why I love and MISS my extended family everyday. I had an egg donor that was HORRIBLE. Another person took me and my baby in, when I was 18 and one day. (She could not get anymore welfare for me and the child, thus I had to go.) That woman was 61 and her friends were all mature women also. They treated me so nice and with their LOVE, patience and guidance, I did OK. Two college degrees, 45 hours of post graduate work, own home, real estate broker, etc. Grand daughter just took the bar. Not bad for a kid that was told that she would never be chit. Not bad for a kid that use to get regular ass kickings for nothing. Not bad for a kid that stayed in jail as a juvenile. Not great, but not bad.

    • @ibabechanel
      @ibabechanel Рік тому +5

      @@Imissyoulou Love this for you, dear sis. Well done !!! 👍👍💃😁🌺

  • @opulence_prime
    @opulence_prime Рік тому +768

    This was the first JM case in all these years that broke me. The mom brought her daughter to court to humiliate her and this happened. The daughter tried to pay her to avoid all of this and she still can’t see past her behaviors that started all of this. I pray that I’m never as blind as the plaintiff and don’t makes these mistakes with my kids.

    • @fireeestarter1
      @fireeestarter1 Рік тому +58

      My mom is the plaintiff. I'm almost 50 now and she probably still doesn't believe me. Being a kid in the 80s was crazy.
      I pray for peace and healing.

    • @suminahmcfadden4350
      @suminahmcfadden4350 Рік тому

      ​@@fireeestarter1 I pray that you're doing better mentally, spiritually and financially. Continue working on your peace of mind. Please know that your mother KNOWS that you were molested and abused by people she allowed in your life. She is narcissistic and would rather hurt you by calling you a liar, rather than admit she was a neglectful mother. Stay away from anyone who's an enemy regardless of their title. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

    • @Hazel.Eyed.Gemini
      @Hazel.Eyed.Gemini Рік тому +26

      The mother is an emotionally immature parent.

    • @opulence_prime
      @opulence_prime Рік тому +20

      @@Hazel.Eyed.Gemini funny thing is I think she believes the daughter but can’t handle the guilt. I agree she’s emotionally immature among other things.

    • @diofiglio1
      @diofiglio1 Рік тому +10

      Agreed, I was really hurt by this case....God Bless that young lady and it seems she is standing strong

  • @ziggyra4525
    @ziggyra4525 3 місяці тому +25

    The “thank you” in the background after him telling her to shut up, rightfully so, was great

  • @kgames1748
    @kgames1748 Рік тому +868

    She did Crack, but she still looks amazing at 46

    • @dragastarr2926
      @dragastarr2926 Рік тому

      And her wicked ass mother over there looking like she’s on the pipe at that very moment 🙄

    • @Nevaeh1
      @Nevaeh1 Рік тому +127

      The drugs were because she never got the proper treatment she needed as a child, so she resorted to self medicating

    • @barbarawesby1728
      @barbarawesby1728 Рік тому +39

      It's called healing and deliverance and restoration which is to bring about a transformation. Anyone can from any drugs, or abuse, or whatever negative encounter they have experienced. The Lord God is actually the one who makes it all possible and the persons determination and preserverance!

    • @anniegantt5220
      @anniegantt5220 Рік тому +45

      As the old saying. I don’t look like what I been through 👏🏽👏🏽

    • @marilynwillett804
      @marilynwillett804 11 місяців тому +8

      The ONLY black woman I ever saw with smooth shiney hair, if it is her hair.

  • @Belle2oo8
    @Belle2oo8 Рік тому +227

    She had the NERVE to start off painting a bad picture of her and failing to state what caused those behaviors

  • @diwi5823
    @diwi5823 9 місяців тому +435

    Judge Mathis wiped that smugness and continual smile right off her face! This woman damaged two generations (her daughter and grandchildren) yet thinks she's better than her daughter for not doing crack! Being a callous narcissist is way worse than escaping into a crack pipe!! That said, God bless this daughter's sobriety and recovery.

    • @onnie.6815
      @onnie.6815 4 місяці тому +12

      I’m glad h mentioned the smile she had on her face. A big, war to war smile on her face. Which is so strange, what about saying ‘my daughter is on drugs’ is causing you to smile so hard ?

  • @MsBizzyRae
    @MsBizzyRae Рік тому +344

    WOW!! JUST WOW!! the mother told her she must have liked it. How DISGUSTING!! I was ready to shout when JM told the mother to shut up...she deserved that from him. The daughter also deserves much more than $5k for what she has gone through. Trauma can last and effect a person for a lifetime. What kind of mother would tell her child that? Smh hats off to JM, as much as he goes hard for mothers to he respected, he also makes sure to check the ones that deserve to be checked!

    • @niccotalbert4378
      @niccotalbert4378 Рік тому +14

      JM torched that woman.

    • @BelwillCoily
      @BelwillCoily Рік тому +19

      I kept rewinding the video just to hear him tell her to “Shut up!” She deserved every bit of that 😠

    • @niccotalbert4378
      @niccotalbert4378 Рік тому +7

      @@BelwillCoily yep, I've been doing the same.

    • @MsBizzyRae
      @MsBizzyRae Рік тому

      @@niccotalbert4378 yes, he did!!

  • @ivonned32
    @ivonned32 Рік тому +299

    And there is people going around repeating like parrots:
    "Your mother is your mother. Forgive her. "
    Forgive shameness is real and needs to stop.
    We heal by accepting what has happened but knowing we have the right to not having to understand the abuser. Is not our job!
    These type of people have no interest in listening the victim. They just want to silent the victim. 😢

    • @finessewright9458
      @finessewright9458 Рік тому +9

      Facts

    • @pseudobean3827
      @pseudobean3827 Рік тому +33

      Truth! The people that preach that are usually abusers themselves. They can't stand that they are to blame for someone's suffering, so they try to force someone to forgive them. It's all so they don't have to feel uncomfortable. It's selfish, and it's not healing for the victims.

    • @rayaee
      @rayaee 10 місяців тому

      They're what I like to call "flying monkeys"... they mean the victim more harm than good

  • @valkyriesardo278
    @valkyriesardo278 9 місяців тому +118

    I like that judge. I liked him before his outburst and I liked him for his outburst.
    The daughter's tears looked genuine to me and I admire her keeping herself clean for over a decade.
    That must have been quite a personal battle for someone so damaged in her youth. She can be proud of herself.

  • @jessicalennon1799
    @jessicalennon1799 Рік тому +448

    It’s so typica from a statistical standpoint, that a victim of sexual abuse will still go to their predator in their teen/adult years. I remember reading it or hearing it somewhere. This whole case was so so so sad. That “mother” showed no empathy, no remorse, just chillingly cold and cruel. So glad the defendant won! ❤

    • @shalanathomas7751
      @shalanathomas7751 Рік тому +51

      I said the same thing! Its typical for victims of abuse to be In a relationship of some kind with their abuser.

    • @ivonned32
      @ivonned32 Рік тому +7

      Wow makes sense

    • @RosannaChristopher
      @RosannaChristopher Рік тому +42

      The fact she was on drugs probably kept her tied to her abuser as well. I just don't understand how these parents don't stand up for thier kids! Those are your children, a part of you. They are the part of you that you protect from whatever and whoever hurt you.

    • @abriaclark6975
      @abriaclark6975 Рік тому

      Where did you read that? I would like to read it

    • @ibabechanel
      @ibabechanel Рік тому

      @@abriaclark6975 Uhm... you can google it ? 🙃

  • @angelphilbert1200
    @angelphilbert1200 Рік тому +426

    Tears were sprouting from my eyes by the time Judge Mathis shouted, "shut up!" How could a mother not see the pain she has repeatedly caused her child? The daughter has cleaned up her life, owns a business, has a supportive husband, and is going to therapy to deal with the lingering issues of PTSD. It should be noted that the mother never mentioned any of these achievements at the beginning of the case against her daughter. I do hope the daughter stays in therapy, gets the help she needs, and stays away from her mother.

    • @loweke
      @loweke Рік тому +24

      At the beginning of the case, I thought the daughter was still on drugs. The mother is so wicked and clearly blamed the daughter bc she saw her as competition at 4! I really feel for this woman

    • @KNByam
      @KNByam Рік тому

      She's an evil woman.

    • @AM-qg6bj
      @AM-qg6bj 9 місяців тому +2

      😂🤣😂

  • @cynthiaholland13
    @cynthiaholland13 3 місяці тому +38

    I'm a social worker. I've seen it too many times. That lady is not lying. That happened to her and that trauma did impact her getting into drugs

  • @minae9935
    @minae9935 Рік тому +740

    SA in the black community (especially at the hands of family members/“loved ones”) is swept under the rug. I 100% believe the daughter and the mother should be ashamed of herself. I don’t have kids but I would always believe them because children (let alone a 4 year old) don’t have the mental capacity to come up with such a thing and it be a lie

    • @Maddluv4eric
      @Maddluv4eric Рік тому +39

      STIP SAYING THAT. IT IS NOT JUST THE BLACK COMMUNITY DOING THIS!!!!

    • @minae9935
      @minae9935 Рік тому +155

      @@Maddluv4eric did I say it’s only the black community?! I’m part of the black community so that is my main focus. Stop trying to deflect from the fact that the BC doesn’t take SA seriously. BYE

    • @Ualari
      @Ualari Рік тому +99

      It’s rampant in the black community!!! Protect black girls! Protect black women!!

    • @kakishisfriend1126
      @kakishisfriend1126 Рік тому +108

      Yup! Then accuse the victims of being "fast" and "grown" its do disgusting

    • @auntiemeemaw3885
      @auntiemeemaw3885 Рік тому +34

      Baby, it's rampant in the Latino, Indian, Native American, white, etc. community. Rampant!

  • @sadiescott5705
    @sadiescott5705 3 місяці тому +41

    When he told the mother to shut up I couldn’t help but notice that someone in the back said thank you right after he said that

  • @thecalmwayhome8483
    @thecalmwayhome8483 5 місяців тому +46

    As a mother, none of my kids grew up with a desire for crack or the streets because they were loved. This mother emotionally injured that woman at a young age and she never really recovered. May she find peace in her latter years and peace with her own children.🌺

  • @keciabrown8321
    @keciabrown8321 Рік тому +213

    I don't understand how you carry a baby in your body, but not in your heart! How?!!!
    The saddest part is hearing this woman cry!!!!

    • @KNByam
      @KNByam Рік тому +9

      I swear I wanted to reach out to her and hug her.

    • @jatnarivas8741
      @jatnarivas8741 9 місяців тому

      Ask your average abortion activist

    • @Weenus-gu1ys
      @Weenus-gu1ys 9 місяців тому +12

      @@jatnarivas8741not the same thing, they at least acknowledge they don’t want it and don’t carry it to full term n poorly raise it

    • @kiwihyunz7452
      @kiwihyunz7452 9 місяців тому +6

      @@jatnarivas8741not the same and never will be the same lol

    • @pacipwincess
      @pacipwincess 3 місяці тому +4

      @@jatnarivas8741 wdym? Cases like these let them give it away. You not gonna care for your baby? DONT HAVE IT.

  • @jenisebayse660
    @jenisebayse660 Рік тому +257

    As an SA survivor that has PTSD due to what happened to me... I am sitting her le crying for her... nobody understands... that a smell, a touch, someone that looks familiar or bringing it back up... causes so much emotional, physical and mental pain... the flashbacks, the lucid dreams, phantom feelings of what happened to you... women,men, boys and girls that go through SA we stay scarred internally for the rest of our lives.... how DARE the "mother" ever say that...may God have mercy on her

    • @francostevo9939
      @francostevo9939 9 місяців тому +5

      Listen, it’s probably none of my business but I don’t like people going alone with this trauma and I want people like that to know there is someone with a sympathetic ear.
      That is why I want you to talk to me. Healing is by talking to someone who will listen. I may appear to be a random comment to you but please, I wan to help. Please talk to me.

    • @djlivvy46
      @djlivvy46 9 місяців тому +11

      Do NOT answer the other comment please! There are men out here like this one who pretend to be sympathetic but they really just want to hear the details of your assault for their own perverted reasons.

    • @francostevo9939
      @francostevo9939 9 місяців тому +5

      @@djlivvy46 are you ducking kidding me?? You think that is what I am here for??!!! The read this poor person’s traumatic past and want to let them know if they are looking for a sympathetic ear, they have one!
      I ain’t perverted!!! Pisses me off that you would immediately just go off on such a conclusion! 😡.

    • @voicemusic3040
      @voicemusic3040 9 місяців тому +1

      @@djlivvy46 “Like this one” ?
      You say that as if U have met this Franco guy before implying that he is a perv. How do U know that is his intention? How do you not k ow that he is actually actually sympathetic? What proof do you have ? So anyone who is actually kind towards a survivor, U R going 2 assume that they R too good to be true and assume that they are pervs?

    • @djlivvy46
      @djlivvy46 9 місяців тому +4

      @@voicemusic3040 - personally, I would never be willing to take that chance. There are too many groomers of all kinds on social media.
      I find it strange that we only see men offering this kind of sympathy and 'support' when the issue being discussed is of a s*xual nature. That always raises a red flag for me.

  • @melissadwiggins
    @melissadwiggins 4 місяці тому +83

    0:34 gee, I wonder why she has a substance use problem? 🤦🏼‍♀️🙄😒

    • @Floorborade
      @Floorborade 3 місяці тому +25

      Right 🤦🏽‍♀️ poor girls life was in pieces, couldn’t even run to her own mother about deep trauma.

  • @Big_Bake
    @Big_Bake Рік тому +172

    That mother actually made me sick to my stomach with what she text her. Wouldn't say something like that to my worst enemy let a lone my kid man smh

  • @indigorose1270
    @indigorose1270 Рік тому +122

    Poor baby. She is still living through the horrific pain as a 4 yr old little girl. The woman that birthed her is the lowest form to enter JM courtroom. Sending peace and love to this Queen. She got her life together and continued success.

  • @Nexistepas67
    @Nexistepas67 9 місяців тому +531

    My mother was similar to this. She is 60 now and has terminal lung cancer and is begging me to come see her. I refused.

    • @lois3779
      @lois3779 5 місяців тому +20

      Forgiveness and let God take it from there.

    • @babydollssoapsnthingz8225
      @babydollssoapsnthingz8225 5 місяців тому +81

      You don't have to see her but forgiveness doesn't require reconnection. It'll be ok.

    • @karliereddfan
      @karliereddfan 5 місяців тому +93

      ​@lois3779 you can forgive and still have enough dignity and self-respect to hold the boundary. Everybody dies. She doesn't deserve to reopen herself to share a pain with someone diabolical.

    • @Mar-enfrance
      @Mar-enfrance 4 місяці тому +60

      If you don't see her, try not to blame yourself when she goes. Every person dies. Hope you find peace somehow. Good luck.

    • @HadassaMoon144
      @HadassaMoon144 4 місяці тому +41

      Is that this person's fault that their mother has cancer. If she was an abusive toxic horrible parent, no child owes her anything!

  • @karendorsey4780
    @karendorsey4780 Рік тому +116

    The defendant is still that four year old child! She’s still hurting! The plaintiff is a horrible Mother! She didn’t even protect her child! Just shameful!

  • @shannonh5347
    @shannonh5347 Рік тому +295

    😮 What a wicked woman!😢 When JM said ‘shut up’ it shook her!

    • @teadaily
      @teadaily Рік тому +25

      that even shocked me 😂😂 i haven’t heard a judge say that

    • @TheeMichellesMind
      @TheeMichellesMind Рік тому +20

      It gave me joy for him to talk to her that way! Nasty heiffa!

    • @queennola3039
      @queennola3039 Рік тому +12

      …hell I stopped talking at home.

  • @jolynecuster3381
    @jolynecuster3381 9 місяців тому +11

    As a survivor of CSA...You just *know* when someone is telling the truth about it. There's this energy you instantly pick up on when they discuss it. Poor woman. I want nothing but healing and joy for her.

  • @juliabensonreazin7672
    @juliabensonreazin7672 10 місяців тому +124

    I was molested as a child by my step father and being called a liar by your mother after suffering for so long is devastating. To this day, I don't have a real close relationship with my mother because she failed to protect me. It's reminded to me everytime I go to therapy and have to talk about the abuse. PTSD is a real condition and it only gets better but never goes away.

    • @savoyaepps
      @savoyaepps 10 місяців тому +2

      I pray God gives you peace dear heart.

    • @jeanetty
      @jeanetty 9 місяців тому +5

      I relate. My mom lied to the investigators, despite claiming she would happily tell the authorities if it meant I could heal.
      I take comfort in that she will grow old, too old to protect herself, and I will let her know that feeling of being alone and scared. Until then, I will wait.

    • @73cidalia
      @73cidalia 4 місяці тому +2

      Honey, you don't need to have ANY relationship with your mother.

  • @Ebony_Monique
    @Ebony_Monique 9 місяців тому +872

    She knew her daughter couldn’t pay her back in full. She loaned it to her just to have something over her head. Just to add to her daughter’s list of failures. If the money was that important to her, she would’ve said no.

    • @raelynm3902
      @raelynm3902 4 місяці тому +82

      Not only just that, if you borrow money from someone, how the HELL DOES IT MATTER how you get it back if you get it back? She KNEW she would struggle to pay back the full lump sum and counted on it. Mother is a monster and deserved the rage the judge had for her. The daughter having those text messages of her mother accusing her of "liking" to be molested is what triggered the judge and he understandably flew off the handle in outrage.

  • @ThPwrNThPuff
    @ThPwrNThPuff 9 місяців тому +48

    In the end, she takes a physical stand to choose not to take anymore of the abuse and walked away from her abusive parent that was in the middle of a sentence, I LOVE THAT. ❤ YOUR ABUSER DOES NOT OWN YOU.
    So proud of her, SO impressed and absolutely blown away by such a stunning individual. ❤

  • @Imissyoulou
    @Imissyoulou Рік тому +180

    Most people don't believe "mothers" like this exist, but they do. I know, I LIVED IT.

    • @jessicajones8872
      @jessicajones8872 Рік тому +9

      Just because u have sex and get pregnant it doesn't mean u will love your baby

    • @kenzierobeetson2865
      @kenzierobeetson2865 9 місяців тому +9

      @@jessicajones8872that’s not the fuvkin point

    • @stefaniacontessa
      @stefaniacontessa 9 місяців тому +1

      Me too!!!

    • @Bugs4419
      @Bugs4419 7 місяців тому

      ​@@jessicajones8872not the point. But go off 😂

    • @lisalong7183
      @lisalong7183 4 місяці тому +1

      I was sexually assaulted at age 16 by a man who lived in our neighborhood. I told my mom immediately. She did nothing.
      When I ended up pregnant as a result of the assault, she wanted me to keep the baby. I wanted to give the baby up for adoption. She got mad and restricted my access to food. When I eventually miscarried at home, she let me experience that alone and wouldn’t take me to the hospital.
      People are surprised that I hated her. They said but that’s your Mom. Nope. Mothers are supposed to love and protect their children. She apparently didn’t get the memo

  • @playboyprincess4436
    @playboyprincess4436 Рік тому +117

    The daughter speech still sounds like a little girl 😔... DEFINITELY SENDING STRENGTHEN COMFORTING AND HEALING PRAYERS HER WAY 🙏🏽

  • @R17W18
    @R17W18 9 місяців тому +39

    That doctor is amazing, most will not be anywhere near so clear and precise. God bless this woman, I hope she's able to heal.

  • @jessicajones8872
    @jessicajones8872 Рік тому +204

    Sadly a lot of moms are jealous of their daughters..and it have nothing to do with having material things. People will hate u just because u are Loved. Praying for her daughters recovery 🥰

    • @ingridfong-daley5899
      @ingridfong-daley5899 9 місяців тому +5

      YES!

    • @mnnickol
      @mnnickol 5 місяців тому +4

      My mother ignored my abuse. I told her the first time it happened. She later went on to blame me and forced me to spend time as a family with my abuser.

    • @josephatherley86
      @josephatherley86 4 місяці тому +1

      Yes I can attest to that.

    • @kawaiionee-chan9557
      @kawaiionee-chan9557 3 місяці тому +1

      @@mnnickolThat is vile. You made it out of that dynamic but that is Vile what she did

  • @shalequisedavis
    @shalequisedavis Рік тому +202

    I’m in tears man … this young lady has been through so much && for her mom to say that crap , after not being there for her … she broke her own daughter smh !!!

    • @amaliomar
      @amaliomar Рік тому

      Young lady? She's 50 😆 🤣 😂 and an "ex" crackhead. Come on you know that life. Those are fake tears and fake story.

    • @ashleymandigo4406
      @ashleymandigo4406 Рік тому +3

      Ain't nothing new sadly

    • @ak24553
      @ak24553 Рік тому +7

      So sad!! The daughter is still in her four year old self. I pray she can heal

  • @__idfk__
    @__idfk__ 9 місяців тому +40

    As someone who was sexually abused then silenced by my parental figures, this really hits hard. The first time it happened, I was 6 years old. Even at 6 years old, when I had no idea what sex was and my cousin who discovered I'd been abused literally had to explain "bad touches" to me, I was accused of being a liar and looking for attention, and they still say that to this day. My heart goes out to this lovely lady and my most sincere fuck you goes to this disgusting, poor excuse for a "mother."

  • @YACKYSNACKY
    @YACKYSNACKY Рік тому +219

    I don't always fall for tears, but I was crying and I believed the defendant even before she presented the evidence. God bless her and heal her, in Jesus' name.

  • @Fan-vidz_spookybish
    @Fan-vidz_spookybish 3 місяці тому +19

    The disgusting 'she enjoyed molestation' what is WRONG WITH HER!? Who the hell says that to their own CHILD!!!! 😢

  • @lulujanuary
    @lulujanuary 2 місяці тому +3

    "You must've liked it or you would of told someone" my mothers words to me about her husband.
    To hear the judge in this case was everything i needed to hear.

  • @Shinypotatochip
    @Shinypotatochip 3 місяці тому +8

    The person who said “thank you” after he told her to shut up is killing me, everyone was done hearing her talk

  • @katehack1677
    @katehack1677 4 місяці тому +19

    Wow. The doctor's letter is absolute fire 🔥🔥🔥

  • @lulusgm1
    @lulusgm1 Рік тому +105

    Molestation in the black home is very prominent and old-school parents call it what happens in this house stays in this house... TRUST ME...I KNOW... A NEIGHBOR'S SON MOLESTED ME AND THEY TOLD ME I WAS BEING FAST... AND NOW THAT I'M OLDER SOME FAMILY MEMBERS STILL TRY TO SAY WE WERE JUST PLAYING HOUSE.... NO HE PHUCKING TOUCHED ME AND Y'ALL DIDN'T DO SHIT

    • @sereneamani1713
      @sereneamani1713 Рік тому +4

      I am so sad that you've experienced this trauma and I hope you are seeking help for healing. Hopefully you won't have to focus on this phenomenon. However, if you did study and focus on it, you'd find that molestation and all other forms of sexual abuse are PROMINENT in the WORLD. I focus on it because I work with people of many ethnicities, and I am aware of its preponderance across the board.

    • @Metyourmatch
      @Metyourmatch 10 місяців тому

      @@sereneamani1713 I see you constantly trying to invalidate people who rightfully want to address the issues of our community. I don’t care what other communities are doing. They do not set the standards of our behavior WE do. It’s disgusting how desperate you are to try and minimize this glaring issue. 60% of black girls in America are violated before they reach 18.

    • @heresyisecstasy
      @heresyisecstasy 9 місяців тому +1

      You didn't deserve any of that. I am so sorry and I hope you are finding peace. I believe you. None of it was cute or okay.

  • @cydninealy3913
    @cydninealy3913 Рік тому +100

    I could never even fathom allowing my daughter to be hurt so deeply on my account. Breaks my heart

    • @digimonalvatrax2738
      @digimonalvatrax2738 3 місяці тому +1

      I don't think I'd ever be the same....I'd never even let her call me and I myself a mom.

  • @targaryenxmandi
    @targaryenxmandi 3 місяці тому +10

    Did anyone hear someone say "thank you" in the audience when the judge told the plaintiff to shut up? And also I'm proud of the defendant for being 13 years sober. Shows she cleaned up her act for the sake of her family and that her husband is helping her.

  • @MsBrandNew126
    @MsBrandNew126 Рік тому +96

    This “mother” is pure evil!!! I pray the defendant receives the healing she needs

  • @tabithac507
    @tabithac507 Рік тому +191

    This was like walking down memory lane for me, how can a mother be this way?😮

    • @brennenjones6658
      @brennenjones6658 Рік тому +15

      *hugs* and sorry that you had to relive your experiences. I hope you have a great and blessed weekend.

    • @Hotwingzlover84
      @Hotwingzlover84 Рік тому +11

      Hugs to you omg 😢

    • @Lysha85
      @Lysha85 Рік тому +3

      Sending love your way ma!💔💔

    • @cryospiral
      @cryospiral Рік тому +2

      I know how you feel. My mother would make this woman look like a saint.

    • @BeKind2AllKinds
      @BeKind2AllKinds Рік тому

      I’m so sorry. I care about you…I hope you are healing. ❤

  • @IAmSanaaLanett
    @IAmSanaaLanett 9 місяців тому +34

    Her daughter is beautiful, my heart sunk because as a teen who went through something similar I get so scared to deal with my anxiety or depression, I’ll turn to something unhealthy. I pray for her daughter she seems like a sweet spirit who is still trying to function as an adult who still in a child like state

  • @underdog365
    @underdog365 Рік тому +182

    This is so heartbreaking 💔💔 heavenly Father please continue to keep your loving arms wrap around the daughter 😥😢😥😢

  • @amberholland5561
    @amberholland5561 5 місяців тому +17

    This woman is still a little girl inside. Her mother makes me sick beyond words. This is so common in black families. Mothers have no idea how these things tear you up inside. I’m completely astounded that this woman after all the trauma she caused has the audacity to come and say such awful things about her daughter. Some women should not have children!! It doesn’t matter when she tells you. I can tell her mother is lying. Her mother is a narcissist and perpetual victim. Sickening. After you’re assaulted you don’t know anything else and you go back to and sometimes yearn for your abuser because that’s what your mind sees and knows as love. God bless this beautiful woman, her family and her business. God sees it all. This mother is going to have to look God in the eye one day and come to terms with her horrific actions. Please go no contact,continue therapy, stay sober, mourn the loss of the mother you wish you had and lean on God. You got this girl!! 💪🏾 ❤️🙏🏽

  • @Javelleahava
    @Javelleahava 10 місяців тому +56

    This poor woman is still emotionally stuck at the age of her trauma. I really hope she received the help that she deserves.

  • @sweetsweet81
    @sweetsweet81 Рік тому +74

    The look on Judge Mathis' face after he said, "This is the worst thing I've heard in 17 years" said it all: he was completely sickened by the mom and her callousness and lack of empathy about her daughter's violent childhood.

    • @sonyretroradiofan177
      @sonyretroradiofan177 Рік тому

      I wonder what it would look like if Steve Wilkos was in the courtroom and he learned of the daughter getting molested?

  • @blueturtle3623
    @blueturtle3623 3 місяці тому +11

    The crazy thing is it doesn't take a psychologist to find the link between the way this woman was raised and her drug use. Her mom doesn't seem to realize that her daughter's drug addiction is a direct reflection of her lack of care in her daughter.

  • @jasonr.9863
    @jasonr.9863 Рік тому +91

    That shut up at 12:28 was very necessary!

    • @umeinui
      @umeinui 10 місяців тому +20

      Can't forget that distant thank you that followed

  • @miyah94
    @miyah94 Рік тому +63

    How can you as a mother, hell as a woman tell another woman she must have enjoyed being molested as a child?

    • @tarag7292
      @tarag7292 Рік тому

      And she was 4 when she was molested. Four! 1, 2, 3, 4. This woman is a monster.

  • @_Amarin
    @_Amarin 9 місяців тому +25

    The mom talks about her daughter's issues (drug addiction, incarceration, homelessness, having 4 kids at a young age etc.) like all of it isn't her fault because of how awfully she treated her own daughter her whole life! How are u gonna beat up your own child for being SA'd? And because the perp was your bf? So you betray your own daughter because of a man? Vile!!

  • @twinthang007
    @twinthang007 Рік тому +25

    Girl walked up to the camera, spoke her truth, straightened her crown and walked off. I pray for peace for her. She may never get over those words spoken by her mother. Huge hugs wherever you are. 🫂♥️💪

  • @cindysammy2513
    @cindysammy2513 Рік тому +93

    This is why kids don't speak up when things happen to them because they believed that people will not believe them it's really sad because a lot of parents especially moms will take the side of their boyfriend over their daughter

  • @codalanguez
    @codalanguez 3 місяці тому +14

    I loved how the Judge face just TURNED. It was clear that he was not a fan of the 'mother,' but was being calm and logical when it came to paying back the loan. But when the text messages that VILE DISGUSTING WOMAN sent to her own child came out, he immediately rained righteous hellfire. I freaking CAN'T with disgusting people who hurt their own children.

  • @carriefuller9939
    @carriefuller9939 Рік тому +37

    You love her so much that when she told you she was sexually abused, you beat her with a damn extension cord. Mother of the year!

  • @WILDANDPEACEFUL23
    @WILDANDPEACEFUL23 Рік тому +48

    This is the first time I watched a case and started crying. This woman is like the mother in the precious movie.

  • @nipunweerakoon_97
    @nipunweerakoon_97 3 місяці тому +12

    I feel so bad for the daughter, she is barely keeping herself together.