I'm Divorced - The Story I Don't Talk About.

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  • Опубліковано 11 вер 2019
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 10 тис.

  • @JoshuaFluke1
    @JoshuaFluke1  4 роки тому +4087

    This was almost 5 years ago now. I didn't make this video to start a witch hunt, or anything like that. I am passed it. It's just me, sharing my experience. Every story has 2 sides. Maybe in her view, I'm nuts. I don't know. You have to understand that when you're in the thick of it; you can't see what everyone else is saying. You're just 'blinded' with feelings and 'hope'. Finland is dope, my second home. A serious contribution to my overall being that you see now. One bad experience with a person from that country doesn't ruin the entire country. Plenty of generous people there. Once friends with a Finn, you're friends for life. They'll give you the shirt off their back, a place to stay, and all you need do is ask.

    • @yt-sh
      @yt-sh 4 роки тому +183

      better alone than friendly in bad relations
      better friendly than lonely in good relations
      - Last Prophet (PBUH)

    • @yt-sh
      @yt-sh 4 роки тому +39

      And dont try to think it from your end you werent weird or anything you were just different for each other
      BTW Man shes CRAAAAAAAAZY

    • @mmx2731
      @mmx2731 4 роки тому +51

      I guess those Finnish teachers don't agree with the Feynman/ Sagan model of teaching. The content is exciting, it's teachers like them that suck any life out of education...bleh
      Also had a very similar situation with a Russian ex. Engaged for a month, then she broke it off. Broke my heart, but you just figure out how to move on I suppose.
      Also, good thing it happened then when there weren't any of your assets to split. Would be tough giving it to someone that didn't care at all about you.

    • @chrishuerta2506
      @chrishuerta2506 4 роки тому +97

      I like how you made a shoutout to the people that helped you through your tough time.

    • @lalalalalala9333
      @lalalalalala9333 4 роки тому +141

      Thank you for sharing your story. You might not realize it but you might be helping someone out there whose in an abusive relationship identify abuse, so kudos to you dude!
      For anyone who is reading this, please please please understand that there is no such thing as "manning up" or "growing a pair" when you are being abused, regardless of the gender of the abuser. Abuse is abuse and you need to run as far as possible away from people who are hurting you.

  • @TechLead
    @TechLead 4 роки тому +8465

    why can't people just be happy..? after the honeymoon phase, it's harder than it looks. well anyways... you wanna trade ex's? I'm just looking for a way to also monetize your ex-wife.

    • @1MinuteFlipDoc
      @1MinuteFlipDoc 4 роки тому +350

      like TechLead did! LOL

    • @KiraPlaysGuitar
      @KiraPlaysGuitar 4 роки тому +118

      I'll trade. Let me start my UA-cam channel first.

    • @JoshuaFluke1
      @JoshuaFluke1  4 роки тому +1402

      Enter at your own risk lmao

    • @KiraPlaysGuitar
      @KiraPlaysGuitar 4 роки тому +44

      @@JoshuaFluke1 Man, seriously, UA-cam seems to be about the least risky option at this stage. At least then it's really on me.

    • @moonsdonut5188
      @moonsdonut5188 4 роки тому +63

      @@1MinuteFlipDoc tecklead monetize every thing ex Google lead ex Facebook lead all his thumbnail says that

  • @junkaccount2535
    @junkaccount2535 4 роки тому +929

    Man the first red flag is at the beginning of your relationship. She told you not to come, and you helped her cheat on her boyfriend. If a woman is unfaithful to her last partner, she will eventually dump you as well. "She never was your woman; it was just your turn."

    • @heyjude4485
      @heyjude4485 3 роки тому +52

      Well. That just made sense.

    • @diobrando4897
      @diobrando4897 3 роки тому +12

      Are you watching Darius m's channel by any chance? :)

    • @junkaccount2535
      @junkaccount2535 3 роки тому +20

      @@diobrando4897 Yes actually, the quote came from him, but the advice is from personal experience with another girl. Thankfully I didnt marry her tho

    • @BboyDaquack
      @BboyDaquack 3 роки тому +7

      @Itachi Uchiha listening to his story was just red pill red flag city. Glad I see em now

    • @user-ti2xi9bd4u
      @user-ti2xi9bd4u 3 роки тому

      faxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • @shreyaindia4024
    @shreyaindia4024 3 роки тому +537

    your first red flag was that she broke up with u and told you not to come and told u she found someone else. If ANYONE, breaks your heart EVEN ONCE, you are supposed to run in the opposite direction.

    • @fangtooth4471
      @fangtooth4471 3 роки тому +26

      Video game répulsion would be the first & last red flag for many of us.

    • @shukhada6664
      @shukhada6664 2 роки тому +3

      @Matthew Neddeau Nah we just think that's not gonna happen for us.

    • @Hawaiiansky11
      @Hawaiiansky11 2 роки тому +6

      @Matthew Neddeau A lot of times, it is because
      (1) we are "in love" / "in lust" / infatuated / high on someone falling for us / being love-bombed by phrases like, "You are the most amazing human being ever!" and
      (2) it's the beginning of the relationship and we don't want to throw away a potentially good thing ('they think I'm the best person they have ever known' - love bombing!) over something seemingly trivial at the start of a relationship or
      (3) we are codependent from having grown up with bad parents, which sounds like Josh, because he used the phrase "knight in shining armor" and that he wanted to prove to her what it was like to experience real love (in hindsight, huge red flags!!), and
      (4) we don't notice the individual red flags until one day when we 'wake up' and see that we are surrounded by a sea of them, most times after which we are already committed, like married or having a child with them, or in my case, they moved in with you and you take pity on them because they have no money or other place to go, etc. so we say to ourselves, "I made a commitment and I fully intend to keep it," where the other person has probably already long since moved on. Speaking of which....
      The one who seems neurotically paranoid about being cheated on, is statistically the most likely to be the one doing all the cheating.

    • @vicfromest
      @vicfromest 2 роки тому +16

      He was really young at the time and these were his very first experiences. We don’t always get it right at 20. I think he did well considering the age.

    • @sheezy2526
      @sheezy2526 2 роки тому +4

      Yes it is unethical too trying to break someone's relationship to be the white knight.

  • @kennarnett8220
    @kennarnett8220 2 роки тому +435

    Regarding your ex-wife: "You can’t be friends with those who broke your heart, ruin your life, took advantage of your love, kindness, forgiveness, or show contempt. They don’t deserve access to your life. There is no friendship there."

    • @PlanetX369
      @PlanetX369 2 роки тому +15

      Well said. I believe this applies to any relationship in your life

    • @samrapheal1828
      @samrapheal1828 2 роки тому +3

      Correctamundo ✔️

    • @DankBeatDubz
      @DankBeatDubz Рік тому +1

      True

    • @cmrsamk
      @cmrsamk Рік тому +1

      true true

    • @vincebu6441
      @vincebu6441 Рік тому

      Unless there is servicing.. ok a little massageanistic.. around the naughty zones but ehh.. we all have needs lol!!! If the party presents itself have fun but be responsible and get that STD test printout from her.. The more you know.....

  • @erowal1
    @erowal1 4 роки тому +1349

    This video shouldn’t be called “I’m Divorced...”, it should be called “I Dodged A Bullet...”

    • @jackbacic868
      @jackbacic868 4 роки тому +12

      Sure did

    • @fredachase5193
      @fredachase5193 4 роки тому +3

      erowal1 that’s for sure

    • @hollyandlorifineart9591
      @hollyandlorifineart9591 4 роки тому +31

      Yess! Thank goodness they didn't have kids!!!

    • @aleckermit
      @aleckermit 4 роки тому +23

      Dodging a bullet still hurts. I think about my ex of 2.5 years nearly every day. Bad break up and lot of regrets that I can't mend.

    • @lyndonbauer1703
      @lyndonbauer1703 4 роки тому +26

      He didn't dodge it, he married it.

  • @nguyenngocduc1993
    @nguyenngocduc1993 4 роки тому +744

    "i will not be friendzone by my wife " ,well that is the highest form of friendzone

  • @jeffhiggins4478
    @jeffhiggins4478 2 роки тому +185

    Bud, your experience sounds so much like mine (apart from living abroad). You’re not alone, dude. I’ve been there too. Stay strong, brother.

    • @RM-kw1hn
      @RM-kw1hn Рік тому +1

      Me too, I’m a woman but same experience with a foreign guy. Those experiences don’t define us or others though. You live and learn. You can not become a bitter person and think everyone is the same. Yes, we were wronged but not everyone will do the same to us again. What is this telling us? That there’s a lot of not so good people out there so we have take out time and look for red flags. We also have to be accountable for our poor judgement at the time if we think retrospectively about not getting to know a person good enough before marrying them and looking for potential red flags. Self-awareness going forward is needed.

  • @siliconiusantogramaphantis2122
    @siliconiusantogramaphantis2122 2 роки тому +71

    I clicked on this expecting to hear a bitter man talk about his past experience with a failed marriage. What I got instead is a story of how a man was kicked down by circumstance, and still managed to pick himself up against all odds. Dude you're a hero. I'm subscribing to your channel now.

  • @thereason1010
    @thereason1010 4 роки тому +509

    Took a lot of balls to share this story. Really appreciate it man! We're all human

    • @lucid3852
      @lucid3852 4 роки тому +3

      thereason1010 exactly what I was thinking

    • @kreativechaosguides4821
      @kreativechaosguides4821 4 роки тому +14

      it sounded like being in hell, especially the deportation threat and losing your degree.

  • @gman9090
    @gman9090 4 роки тому +3089

    Repeat after me boys..finance before romance.

    • @kaputasri
      @kaputasri 4 роки тому +261

      More like never romance cos romance can take your finance to zero pretty fast.

    • @mgtowgoose8862
      @mgtowgoose8862 4 роки тому +208

      Acquire currency, ignore women. Be the best version of yourself you can be.

    • @dannytheman2217
      @dannytheman2217 4 роки тому +37

      Yes let them beg

    • @gabrielmorais3554
      @gabrielmorais3554 4 роки тому +62

      mgtow goose Disregard Females, acquire currency or Fuck bitches, make money 😎

    • @spiralviper8158
      @spiralviper8158 4 роки тому +31

      @@dannytheman2217 there's always more men for them, it's on us to avoid the well of bitterness and misery but becoming our best selves. but it's difficult to reach that point without then desiring love

  • @InstructorMike
    @InstructorMike 2 роки тому +28

    Dude I am so glad that I listen to the entire of your story. If you don’t mind, I would love to continue to share it. It could save so many people who may be open to it

  • @suraya1224
    @suraya1224 3 роки тому +140

    It sounds like your ex was a narcissist. We all make mistakes, but don't let her make you eternally bitter. Just don't ignore the warning signs. Trust your gut, take your time, & look beyond the initial emotional romantic feelings. Proceed with caution. Good luck 🙂

  • @christingunning293
    @christingunning293 3 роки тому +1403

    It takes a strong man to speak up about emotional abuse.

    • @briannecaswell6204
      @briannecaswell6204 3 роки тому +17

      Very much so! It gives me hope that one day I will find a man who is able to share his feelings and have a healthy discussion when need be lol. So far no luck!

    • @marybell2002
      @marybell2002 3 роки тому +22

      I'm shocked at how many stories I'm hearing about verbal, emotional and physical abuse by women. I'm wondering if things were always like this but no one talked about it or if its a downside of radical feminism.

    • @neronihil1710
      @neronihil1710 3 роки тому +23

      @@marybell2002 its been like this for a very long time. The woman who opened the first shelter for women in the UK was a devoted feminist. After a while she came to the realization that men experience very similar kinds abuse and tried to address this issue. The response from the feminist community towards her, was swift and brutal. They basically excommunicated her, poisened her dog and destroyed her reputation.
      I could be wrong but i believe her name was Erin Pizzey. Look up her story if you're interested

    • @laurenshannon2703
      @laurenshannon2703 3 роки тому +11

      Her words were brutal, emotional abuse. So sorry this happened.

    • @DX-d
      @DX-d 3 роки тому +5

      Are you kidding! she was the only one working & spending money ON HIM?!!! And for YEARS?!! Unbelievable.
      And he says now that he doesn’t want to be a provider for a woman!! Pathetic. No one in their right mind would be with a loser that takes money from women.

  • @MegaTriumph1
    @MegaTriumph1 4 роки тому +511

    They say love is blind, but marriage is sure an eye opener.

    • @SuperLiliana1973
      @SuperLiliana1973 4 роки тому

      LOL :D :D

    • @KKKK-jr1nm
      @KKKK-jr1nm 4 роки тому +1

      Lol yeah.

    • @sunset2.00
      @sunset2.00 4 роки тому +5

      thanks Disney.

    • @nagisa0931
      @nagisa0931 3 роки тому

      Wow, this comment rhymed , it even be a poem

    • @12akul
      @12akul 2 роки тому

      @@nagisa0931 It actually didn't but ok

  • @HillyPat
    @HillyPat 2 роки тому +18

    Josh, I can't imagine anyone not just loving you. It wasn't you, it was her - and she realized at that airport what she was losing. God bless you, young man.

  • @jordanpremo
    @jordanpremo 3 роки тому +33

    I've never wanted to give someone a hug more than I did after hearing this. It takes a strong man to talk about stuff like this. So glad it worked out for you in the end.

  • @BrendanStBrown
    @BrendanStBrown 4 роки тому +1572

    I want this guy to do well in life

    • @ENIGMAXII2112
      @ENIGMAXII2112 4 роки тому +24

      ME TOO

    • @Bushey4545
      @Bushey4545 4 роки тому +5

      Haha You know that's true

    • @cuybueno
      @cuybueno 4 роки тому +21

      This kid have made many mistakes due to his short age. Thinking that she was going to foot the bills while he was studying was the worst mistake.

    • @Dice-Z
      @Dice-Z 4 роки тому +6

      I think he is.

    • @adeneo.g6456
      @adeneo.g6456 4 роки тому +11

      He is a good solid dude, you could play pool with and share a few drinks. The woman is spawn of satan my goodness.

  • @lightgiver7311
    @lightgiver7311 3 роки тому +514

    I guess I was lucky. I married a divorced man and I was a young widow. Marriage is hard. It had some challenges. We made a pact. We gave each other one thousand I loves you every day. One touch to the face, 1 hug, 1 kiss, a daily reminder of our love. We were together 37 years. I lost him to death.

    • @tommak6516
      @tommak6516 3 роки тому +13

      You were a young widow, now you are an old widow. Ironic.

    • @donitawhite8111
      @donitawhite8111 3 роки тому +2

      @Wally Reyes 🤣🤣

    • @Observer82AB
      @Observer82AB 3 роки тому +19

      That is how marriages are supposed to work.

    • @zander4529
      @zander4529 3 роки тому +16

      very sorry for your loss

    • @gillpb638
      @gillpb638 3 роки тому +60

      F these losers making jokes you were wonderful and every marriage should be like this.

  • @99994139
    @99994139 2 роки тому +22

    I'm 28 right now, never married, I had two engagements both did not work out well. I know Divorce is not the same as ending engagement but I feel you and what you have gone through becasue it feels sucks to be lonely and don't have someone in your life to support you in times of need in this tough life.

  • @ikennaq2
    @ikennaq2 2 роки тому +73

    There is something about you Joshua. You're the type of person that makes the world a better place. Thanks for sharing.

  • @jonlouis2582
    @jonlouis2582 3 роки тому +675

    I keep my divorce certificate in a frame in my bedroom to remind me never to do that again.

    • @user-ti2xi9bd4u
      @user-ti2xi9bd4u 3 роки тому +22

      @@Comeswoopfam not everybody is like that, chill bro. there's someone who loves you, but she just has yet show up

    • @b__w_4565
      @b__w_4565 3 роки тому +71

      @@user-ti2xi9bd4u dude honestly it ain’t even that...fuck the legalities involved with marriage. They fuck men over. Why can’t we just give each other a ring and call it a day...it’s 2020 men and women work and the laws can’t be like the fu king 40’s anymore. Why do we need a contract to spend our lives with people!!!

    • @bestredditstories1158
      @bestredditstories1158 3 роки тому +11

      Fucking legend

    • @nicoleholley7049
      @nicoleholley7049 3 роки тому +3

      If I get a devorce that's what I'm going to do!!!

    • @littleripper312
      @littleripper312 3 роки тому +21

      I think people get married way too lightly. Also what people don't seem to realize is that even if you are well matched it's going to take a lot of work to build a strong lasting marriage. For me it's not something I want but I know plenty of people who are happily married and would never want to be single. I think we need to just stop pressuring people to get married because a lot of people dont really want it- both men and women.

  • @jjlatinopedia
    @jjlatinopedia 4 роки тому +267

    Not a Tom Leykis listener I see.
    Married at the age of 20 - Strike 1
    Talked to a girl online for a few years -Strike 2
    Dropped the "L" word - YOURE OUT!!!!

  • @BrianKarmo
    @BrianKarmo Рік тому +22

    You my friend were dealing with a pure covert narcissist, I as well am now seperated for over 18 months but rather her presenting a divorce paper, she caused me not to recieve my federal taxes and drained all my energy, as well as my resources, but i have two kids with that Jezzebelle(A.K.A. Jezzy)although i did love her, she as well was draining on my emotions. Just be glad and happy , we are are survivors.

  • @alexward8596
    @alexward8596 2 роки тому +11

    That divorce was a blessing, imagine being in that situation still.

  • @dumbr457
    @dumbr457 4 роки тому +562

    "My parents were sued and lost their house. They were basically homeless...." That couped with the divorce, rough times.

    • @Sean-ll5cm
      @Sean-ll5cm 4 роки тому +17

      I want the story behind that.. I'm curious about his family situation now

    • @Xellos976
      @Xellos976 4 роки тому +43

      @@Sean-ll5cm in a previous video, he has spoken about how his dad was let go from the company he worked for his entire life and then when he tried starting a business he was sued because he signed a non compete clause or something when he first got the job.

    • @Sean-ll5cm
      @Sean-ll5cm 4 роки тому

      @@Xellos976 ah damn

    • @jasonreviews
      @jasonreviews 4 роки тому +4

      Now he's famous on UA-cam

    • @justinTime077
      @justinTime077 4 роки тому +1

      Sean its hard to miss. Dumbr it just sounds like a few days on planet earth to me.

  • @robwembley
    @robwembley 4 роки тому +674

    ABUSE is ABUSE.
    There are NO excuses.
    Well done for terminating a 'toxic relationship'.

  • @aimeenunez2904
    @aimeenunez2904 2 роки тому +7

    You have a heart of gold and I'm really sorry you been through these messed up relationships... Sometimes people are so caught up in their own issues they lash out at the people closest to them

  • @isagoldfield7393
    @isagoldfield7393 Рік тому +9

    YOU DESERVE THE BEST JOSH, ONLY THE BEST. Blessings to YOU‼️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

  • @AEDIVINE
    @AEDIVINE 4 роки тому +774

    Watching this video made me get up and hug and smooch my husband while he’s doing his schoolwork. I can’t believe anyone would treat their husband like that, how horrible. I hope your life is much happier now

    • @ishmael802
      @ishmael802 3 роки тому +17

      H3DDIE best of luck in your future

    • @felixt1470
      @felixt1470 3 роки тому +11

      H3DDIE Don’t kid yourself. It’s a common scenario!

    • @md.mehrabhaque2223
      @md.mehrabhaque2223 3 роки тому +20

      Your husband is lucky

    • @AEDIVINE
      @AEDIVINE 3 роки тому +25

      cbr9292you lolol who hurt you? I’ve been happily married since 2013 actually, sorry your life is miserable though :(

    • @AEDIVINE
      @AEDIVINE 3 роки тому +26

      cbr9292you wait?? You’re a married 45 year old man but you talk like a scorned 18 year old virgin? Yikes. I asked who hurt you because you came on MY comment being negative, when you don’t know me or my relationship. Sorry if your wife cheated on you or whatever but if you talk to her like you’re talking to me then it’s no surprise really

  • @714lmfao
    @714lmfao 4 роки тому +436

    Loved the honesty. Abuse is abuse regarless of the gender.

    • @karelhalim8090
      @karelhalim8090 3 роки тому

      @@astondias810 dude the fuck you said that for?

    • @karelhalim8090
      @karelhalim8090 3 роки тому +1

      @@astondias810 ,okey i admitted it , wasnt ur fault u were bored , what should we do im bored too

  • @UmeshABhat
    @UmeshABhat Рік тому +9

    Had a simliar experience here in Estonia. Many thanks for sharing. Stay Strong.

  • @McofCOD
    @McofCOD 4 роки тому +241

    Imagine being able to say "Sorry I can't go on vacation with you, I'm banned from every nation in the EU." Your friends would be like wtf did he do?

    • @BernardBrunu1
      @BernardBrunu1 4 роки тому +23

      I guess he might now be a supporter of Britain leaving the EU.

    • @josevasconcellos9633
      @josevasconcellos9633 4 роки тому +1

      Jajaja

    • @HickoryDickory86
      @HickoryDickory86 4 роки тому

      😂

    • @yvesgysel9834
      @yvesgysel9834 4 роки тому +9

      Strange. Here in Belgium, you would keep your permission to stay after the divorce and it is also within the EU. Josh is also talking about deportation back to the USA and a 10 years ban from visiting any EU Country. Josh, I think your ex wife and her family were playing you. This would never happen within the EU. In reality everybody can come over to the EU, file for a citizens permission and wait. In the main time you get food and shelter. If your citizens permission is declined, you can always go to court. Here totally free. Courtcost and Laywer. So You can prolonge your stay for 3 to +10 Years. Yes I know a case, we're it took 16 Years to have a final Verdict. She got a piece of paper, saying that she had to leave Belgium, that is all. She is still living in Belgium and has now even the Belgian Nationality. You can always file for a new citizens permission if your situation has changed. Western European Countries are still feeling guilty for the Holocaust and Hitler, so we would never deport people. To my American friends, You should definitely come over and visit Europe. Greetings

    • @Ukraineaissance2014
      @Ukraineaissance2014 7 місяців тому

      My brothers banned from spain for stealing a saudi princes boat

  • @Yolduranduran
    @Yolduranduran 4 роки тому +358

    I agree people dont understand that men can also suffer abuse.

    • @TheUtuber999
      @TheUtuber999 4 роки тому +53

      Women are (usually) conditioned not to get into physical altercations, so instead they hone their skills toward doing psychological battle against others.

    • @freedom13245
      @freedom13245 4 роки тому +15

      @@TheUtuber999 yes that's a fact

    • @liamdavis492
      @liamdavis492 4 роки тому +19

      @@TheUtuber999 women are as aggressive as men, except socially instead of physically. That's a psychological fact.

    • @exstee
      @exstee 4 роки тому +9

      @@TheUtuber999 And those psychological attacks often do way more damage then physical. It damages the mind and spirit. Bitches be crazy.

    • @differentbutsimilar7893
      @differentbutsimilar7893 4 роки тому +2

      @@TheUtuber999 You'd be surprised. You know who have the highest incidence of physical domestic abuse? Lesbians.
      But in hetero relationships, definitely. Seen it many times, lived it myself.

  • @cherylblack184
    @cherylblack184 2 роки тому +18

    I am going through your videos. If you haven't already, hire an attorney and follow up with the divorce. Make certain the paperwork has been filed and you are divorced. It's concerning you signed something you couldn't read and obviously aren't clear on the process. Hopefully enough time has passed that emotionally you can revisit it if only to make certain that chapter is indeed over.

  • @veggiesalad1878
    @veggiesalad1878 2 роки тому +3

    I’m really proud of you and how far you’ve come! 😊 Thank you for opening up and sharing with us your story

  • @yourcaseworker6916
    @yourcaseworker6916 3 роки тому +614

    *You don't know a woman...*
    *UNTIL YOU MEET HER IN COURT!*

  • @inconspicuousbystander6224
    @inconspicuousbystander6224 4 роки тому +1059

    "She was a hairdresser..." Hooo boy, how many divorce stories include that line friend.

    • @hassibk6121
      @hassibk6121 4 роки тому +12

      Matt W Lmao

    • @johnsmith-vu3sv
      @johnsmith-vu3sv 4 роки тому +7

      Lol what?

    • @SenhorBeGo
      @SenhorBeGo 4 роки тому +21

      LOL...but you are not lying

    • @MentalDeviant
      @MentalDeviant 4 роки тому +18

      In the crazy hot matrix. Hair dressers are mentioned as a negative but they are not all bad.

    • @attractiveforce8609
      @attractiveforce8609 4 роки тому +12

      @Assoluto Cosmico but when it comes to murder it's always the gardener^^

  • @jayc9179
    @jayc9179 3 роки тому +125

    I'm Finn and yes we're very blunt!! You married a cosmetologist and they're typically nuts.

  • @generalcarver
    @generalcarver 2 роки тому +4

    josh, man, so sorry you had to go though this. But thanks for sharing. As painful it is to recall this, there are some good lessons for people.

  • @TuulaMaaria
    @TuulaMaaria 3 роки тому +1040

    As a Finnish woman, also long ago divorced from a man (British) who tried to adapt to life in Finland, this was super hard to watch. You really came up with the worst sides of Finland, and unfortunately, your story is one I have heard from others in almost the same words.

    • @yavuz9038
      @yavuz9038 3 роки тому +47

      I think Russian people are better at marriages.

    • @felixt1470
      @felixt1470 3 роки тому +150

      Well, he plays video games all day and doesn’t have a source of income! What could go wrong???

    • @RodneyKimbangu
      @RodneyKimbangu 3 роки тому +12

      Why hard to watch? I wonder ...

    • @yunusbars4586
      @yunusbars4586 3 роки тому +86

      ​@@felixt1470 as a former exchange student who moved to Finland and lived there for a whole year I can easily say that living in Finland as a foreigner is not that much easy. Even though I had too many friends and good experience not everyone among my exchange student friends was as lucky as me. Most of my exchange student friends had hard times with making friends or talking to people. And if you can't speak Finnish it's almost impossible to get a job there also Finnish language is world's one of the hardest languages to learn for native english speakers. Because Finnish is a completely different language among european languages, it doesn't have much similarities with english. I have one more last thing to say: Finnish people are one of the worlds warmhearted people but you gotta touch/reach their hearts and it's not easy to do that because they are too shy to show and express their emotions.

    • @neirienvy
      @neirienvy 3 роки тому +46

      ​@@yavuz9038 according to russia beyond (rbth) and statista, russians divorce nearly equally as much as they marry. if that's considered "good", i'm worried

  • @vinolabikunda7418
    @vinolabikunda7418 3 роки тому +557

    You married a women who wasnt ready to be married. You are doing better as a single person. Stay blessed

    • @toushiri9476
      @toushiri9476 3 роки тому +14

      No biiiiig nooooo
      He is a good guy and i hope one day he find a good girl too
      I am not saying go and search for one.. but at least keep your eyes open
      There are good people out there don’t punish yourself because of single woman
      Your sexual needs are not something to be ashamed for.. it’s more than normal.. they are life enjoyments. It’s just she couldn’t end the relationship and couldn’t say it clearly so she tried to make you feel bad so you are the one who stop it
      People like are wanted.. don’t let a good loyal girl goes a way just because you had a bad experience with a random bii**

    • @tross8863
      @tross8863 3 роки тому +29

      He WASN'T ready to be married.

    • @alanadenham7997
      @alanadenham7997 3 роки тому +20

      Huh? He was literally a man-child who did nothing for himself or her and played video games all day. No woman wants to raise a man! No one.

    • @sergeijegorov1440
      @sergeijegorov1440 3 роки тому +15

      @@alanadenham7997 They had no money to do anything else and she wasn't letting him drive or do something, this is the only thing could do to stay mentally okay and relieve some stress.

    • @alanadenham7997
      @alanadenham7997 3 роки тому +8

      @@sergeijegorov1440 The reality is that while in school he could have worked on campus part-time and made some level of contribution. Per his own account, he went to school and played video games like a 15 year old. No woman will put up with that mess for long. "Let him drive" Lol He was grown, he could have caught a cab or walked. Lolol

  • @IAMCHIDERA
    @IAMCHIDERA Рік тому +12

    He’s such a sweetheart I’m so sorry you went through this 😭

  • @vincenthaegebaert1854
    @vincenthaegebaert1854 3 роки тому +3

    Sounds like hell, glad you made it through.💪💪💪💪

  • @starboy2013
    @starboy2013 4 роки тому +189

    Ok when she says she meet someone and you make out with her.There is your red flag.

    • @YorktownUSA
      @YorktownUSA 4 роки тому +8

      Yep.

    • @dougg1075
      @dougg1075 4 роки тому +2

      Yes

    • @harryking4007
      @harryking4007 4 роки тому +20

      Yes that's right. But he ignored that .like we all have done

    • @starboy2013
      @starboy2013 4 роки тому +14

      @@harryking4007 totally,if you do the postmortem like we all do there were red flags everywhere.

    • @kevinmiller8111
      @kevinmiller8111 4 роки тому +7

      Young and dumb, we've all been there. I dated some horrible women when I was younger and in retrospect the red flags were obvious to everyone but me. You learn from your mistakes, can't blame him for that.

  • @IBennx77I
    @IBennx77I 4 роки тому +180

    Josh you lost someone who didnt care about you, but this girl lost someone who really loved her, so she is clearly the loser. Learning from such situations is more worth than gold.

    • @xo_kryptoknight4147
      @xo_kryptoknight4147 4 роки тому +1

      This is the exact quote I tell myself all the time

    • @sunnydays405
      @sunnydays405 4 роки тому +5

      Cope. She'll find someone else in no time. Joshua lost big time here, but it seems like it was a good learning experience for him.

    • @sunnydays405
      @sunnydays405 4 роки тому +11

      @@alantinoalantonio you're right josh won in the end becoming successful, I just think assuming she is going to have a shitty life is cope. Who knows how her life turned out.

    • @alantinoalantonio
      @alantinoalantonio 4 роки тому +6

      @@sunnydays405 It's safe to assume that people that live for themselves and are damaged will end up bitter since they are damaged. Damaged people don't love themselves and therefore it's impossible for them to love others. Josh grew, learned, and knows what to look for and what to avoid. Look around. Wholesome women love people and are genuinely joyful. Selfish cunts end up lifeless inside.

    • @sunnydays405
      @sunnydays405 4 роки тому +4

      @@alantinoalantonio perhaps you're right. I'm a little jaded and think too many people commit a just world fallacy when looking at these kind of situations. For the record I hope you're right.

  • @MayLinh_ASMR
    @MayLinh_ASMR 3 роки тому +2

    I can relate. Thanks for sharing your story, Joshua! Stay strong 🙏💖

  • @Jay-hd4jx
    @Jay-hd4jx 2 роки тому +5

    The experience was rough, but you are much stronger for having conquered a situation where many people would have given up. Respect!

  • @kitt7082
    @kitt7082 4 роки тому +791

    Now tell us your fitness story

    • @ProactiveIfeatu
      @ProactiveIfeatu 4 роки тому +11

      i can tell your not an OG fan he made a fitness story years ago

    • @moonsdonut5188
      @moonsdonut5188 4 роки тому +6

      Boom roasted

    • @robertjif6337
      @robertjif6337 4 роки тому

      FitnessReel coming soon

    • @JoshuaFluke1
      @JoshuaFluke1  4 роки тому +229

      I was fat. Then I decided I wanted to go on dates again. Girls don't particularly want to date another planet. So I decided to slim down.

    • @moonsdonut5188
      @moonsdonut5188 4 роки тому +48

      @@JoshuaFluke1 saturn is huge but is doing well in dating so many moons

  • @Saffeyah
    @Saffeyah 3 роки тому +337

    The fact you said she said she found another guy from the very beginning and you spent money to take a trip to see her. That would have been case closed. Aside from being young. Guys, do not take crap from any woman who tears you down. No matter how gorgeous she looks. She’s toxic, stay away from her.

    • @Saffeyah
      @Saffeyah 3 роки тому +12

      @Daniel the Maniel yeah you’re right

    • @everythingisupsidedown9593
      @everythingisupsidedown9593 3 роки тому +5

      Ever had a relationship with woman that doesn't tear you down? From your Mom onwards?

    • @gondaljarrat8864
      @gondaljarrat8864 3 роки тому

      ua-cam.com/video/RO0fijTVcTk/v-deo.html

    • @shanedowling4214
      @shanedowling4214 3 роки тому +2

      @Mahta The Great wait till you hear my story, worse than his but glad I made it out and found a throne through my run in dirt. We only know what we experience hence why you didn’t know this is rampant and trust me it is. Same way we men don’t know much about what women experience cos we don’t live their experience. Understanding each other’s struggles is the way forward. There are wicked toxic people in all sides.

    • @shanedowling4214
      @shanedowling4214 3 роки тому

      @Ig Hanchks I wanna live in this world. I will definitely marry here. Sadly the society at large is the opposite of this such amazing society. Out of curiosity, where is it? I’ll understand if you don’t want to share. Please protect your community at all cost. Rare and golden

  • @aerodylluk2543
    @aerodylluk2543 2 роки тому +1

    What a story dude. You got a new sub. I am glad you made it through everything. You done some life miles there for sure.

  • @StanleyMaeschen
    @StanleyMaeschen Рік тому

    Thanks for sharing your great story. So many similar experiences also in another country at that time. Keep up the good work.

  • @go4damo
    @go4damo 3 роки тому +350

    "'How old were you?'
    'I was young and dumb. That's how old I was.'"

  • @keepforever726
    @keepforever726 4 роки тому +253

    "I love you so much I want to get the government involved." ~ Jim Carry

    • @Hawaiiansky11
      @Hawaiiansky11 2 роки тому +1

      That's why it should not be called marriage unless you do it in a church, where you ask God's sanctification. A marriage involved three; you, me and God. Without God, it's nothing more than a domestic partnership.

  • @goldencedi5016
    @goldencedi5016 3 роки тому +2

    Man what a real story! I love you bro! I'm glad that you came out on top. Life can be tough and you made the choice to find your own happiness!

  • @75Cee
    @75Cee 2 роки тому

    This was extremely touching. Thank you for sharing.

  • @Adefuye
    @Adefuye 4 роки тому +152

    That relationship sounds like a freakn NIGHTMARE

    • @spiralviper8158
      @spiralviper8158 4 роки тому +5

      all too common though. as a culprit myself, it's on me to learn to live without love

    • @spiralviper8158
      @spiralviper8158 4 роки тому

      @Pewdiepie's Hot Dog Boss touche, fuck that shit

    • @spiralviper8158
      @spiralviper8158 4 роки тому +1

      @Craig X to me it seems like the more you try to control a situation the more it gets out of hand. People do what they like, but social magnetism and push-pull dynamics are a thing. "The more you chase after it, the more it gets away from you." - Alan Watts

  • @mzansimomentsreloaded913
    @mzansimomentsreloaded913 3 роки тому +301

    Bro I cried when you said she didn't even give you food.

    • @jnjerinduati
      @jnjerinduati 3 роки тому +42

      She was a narcissist

    • @ivanjdrakov1957
      @ivanjdrakov1957 3 роки тому +31

      Yeah the money for lunch was terrible, that made my eyes water.. No money for food and having to ask, beg for lunch money for school!!!
      I think that it's absolutely sick how she treated him...
      I'm sure he learned some super valuable lessons from this whole experience!
      Sweet
      Keep well and be safe everyone!
      😁🇧🇬🛸

    • @tyggy3
      @tyggy3 3 роки тому +19

      Omg! I'm still crying! How could anyone do anyone like that, especially when they are from another country? My heart is sad for what he went through. I pray things are much better now 🙏🙏

    • @ivanjdrakov1957
      @ivanjdrakov1957 3 роки тому +3

      @@tyggy3 can you actually believe the nerve this girl had, or has..... I'd try my best to get away from her asap....

    • @mzansimomentsreloaded913
      @mzansimomentsreloaded913 3 роки тому +8

      @@tyggy3 Some people are just pure evil its sad.

  • @thatguy6207
    @thatguy6207 3 роки тому +26

    I was robbed when my ex wife left... I was working over seas, came home, everything was gone... everything.
    I thought I was robbed... then I found out I really was robbed.

    • @Zorocanify
      @Zorocanify 3 роки тому +4

      That sucks man. Hope you’re better now..

  • @ohyeah2269
    @ohyeah2269 2 роки тому

    mann thanks for sharing... really needed this and resonate. I just have so much appreciation and respect for you, hearing this story.

  • @JoelAntwi
    @JoelAntwi 4 роки тому +323

    well this was a surprise. really honest and real. I like it

  • @typingcat
    @typingcat 4 роки тому +124

    You might say, "Your marriage was FINNISHed.

  • @brelendwiggins7238
    @brelendwiggins7238 2 роки тому +1

    Inspiring. Thanks for sharing

  • @CoralNeon-nk6vf
    @CoralNeon-nk6vf 3 дні тому

    Sharing this and being vulnerable shows just how strong 💪🏾 you are. New sub, thank you for all you do. ❤

  • @keltongreen5455
    @keltongreen5455 4 роки тому +709

    between seeing Josh and THE TECH LEAD coming out about the effects of divorce and shedding insight on this topic will help young men be more analytical about marriage. Thank you so much for sharing your story sir.

    • @jonreyes166
      @jonreyes166 4 роки тому +12

      agreed, really got to weigh the pros and cons of it

    • @alashawn8
      @alashawn8 4 роки тому +16

      I LOVE THESE TWO GUYS!

    • @JoshuaFluke1
      @JoshuaFluke1  4 роки тому +55

      I'd like to think we love you too

    • @hendrixansel9750
      @hendrixansel9750 4 роки тому +21

      The difference is, at this point, josh is very redpill and techlead is pretty blue pilled.

    • @saraache9420
      @saraache9420 4 роки тому +27

      I am a girl and because of those two vids and some real life experiences from my family, I am honestly traumatized to get married.

  • @jessealexander9074
    @jessealexander9074 Рік тому +1

    I had a similar experience with a long term relationship. Thanks so much for sharing your story, makes me feel less alone.

  • @UndertakerU2ber
    @UndertakerU2ber 4 роки тому +178

    I know I can’t watch this video. It’ll just resurface bad memories of my parents’ divorce.
    One of the worst parts was knowing how my mom beat my father over the most trivial issues, and my dad started making secret recordings of her abuse. When the inevitable divorce proceedings started, the judge just blindly went along with the narrative that my father was the abuser, and my dad couldn’t present the video evidence he had because the state has a law prohibiting secret audio recordings in a private setting (such as a home).
    My dad was then charged as a spouse abuser by the district attorney, and before the case went to trial, his lawyer went to the DA and handed him the videotapes. The DA said “Steven? C’mon you know better. We’ve gotta let this go to trial and see what happens as usual.” And my father’s lawyer just said “Just...look at the tapes, for Christ sakes...” The spouse abuse case was dropped the day after those lawyers talked with each other, but my mom was never charged, because the tapes were inadmissible in court.
    My dad still has a public listing on the docket that he was charged with assault despite the case being dropped. He never wants to talk or think about it, because the thought of being treated as the villain despite being the victim is a very, very painful experience to endure...

    • @lifeandhomewithmeredith9050
      @lifeandhomewithmeredith9050 4 роки тому +1

      UndertakerU2ber I am so sorry you and your dad went through that! I learned early that life is never fare. Much Love

    • @lowdieee
      @lowdieee 4 роки тому +4

      How do you feel about your mom now?

    • @user-cm9kd3bw7y
      @user-cm9kd3bw7y 4 роки тому +2

      Stay tough . Wish you and your dad the best .

    • @AgeofMachines
      @AgeofMachines 3 роки тому +2

      Yet one accusation and men are guilty....

    • @Mike-yy4ll
      @Mike-yy4ll 3 роки тому

      @land otter1 My wife broke my sternum - hit it with elbow (she used to do martial arts) for me hiccup for too long. When i got to a doctor, he understood it instantly and tried to call the police to arrest her. I refused, but that man is doing the right things and doctors actually can help you in those domestic abuse cases.

  • @SProductions166
    @SProductions166 4 роки тому +127

    Hella shed a tear for you brother. When you got the call and dropped the phone and hugged your friend.. I felt that

  • @VangaroZeon
    @VangaroZeon 2 роки тому +9

    It's really crazy how similar our lives went around our same respective ages. Same deal...met online, moved to a new country...the stressful visa process...the starving after I was robbed...Just discovered you today and I really enjoy the content.

  • @dominique046
    @dominique046 Рік тому

    you're the real 1!! thanks for your transparency brother, appreciate it

  • @dougl8248
    @dougl8248 4 роки тому +119

    Count yourself as lucky to have not had a bunch of kids with this woman and begun making money because it could have been much worse.

  • @iamrockness
    @iamrockness 4 роки тому +154

    I was with a beautiful girl for 3 years who was my best friend in every sense of the word. We treated each other so well, moved in together, bought a house, nearly got married and nearly had kids. We almost had the american dream, so to speak. Over the course of 2 months, I watched her emotionally and mentally fall apart before my very eyes and abuse me emotionally, mentally, and even physically. I was basically forced to move out for my own health as trying to keep our relationship together withered me away. It still baffles me how someone who looks you in the eyes and promises to Love you forever, talks about growing old with you, and even discusses the names of children with you can go to the lengths of hurting you with a smile on their face, blaming you for why they're hurting you, and then projecting their insecurity and infidelity onto you. I've learned since then that those people are only to be pitied and forgotten. They fester in their own narcissism and lies, never really feeling guilty until it's too late and they're desperate for some other sucker to love them. Truly awful stuff, but we all grow stronger from it. Much love to all of you.

    • @iamrockness
      @iamrockness 4 роки тому +10

      @Steven Boortz I totally understand your confusion and your pain. It is unbearable at times and it just feels like a pit of despair that you won't ever get out of. Just know that it's okay to feel all of what you're feeling, and that it will pass. What they did was cruel and unjust. They do it to try and rid themselves of the guilt. They do it because in their mind, if they can convince themselves of the lie that you're awful, they dont have to feel bad for hurting you. They will go to the extent of gaslighting you to the point of making you wonder if you were as bad as they make you think you were. However, a relationship takes two. Both parties contributed to the beginning and failure of the relationship. One the catalyst and one the receiver. The only thing you can do, is keep your head held high and maintain your dignity. Your time is worth way more than what they've done to you. It will take time, and it is going to hurt a lot. I mean, a lot a lot. I'm not going to sugar coat it. It will sting for a long time, but as a result you will gain wisdom, insight, and strength from it. So much so that someone who values you will notice it and be drawn to it. For now, let the pain flow. Cry if you gotta. No shame in it. People will hurt you in life, but you'll always be there to get yourself back up. Love yourself first, and no amount of BS others put you through will ever be too much. Take your time. You fuckin got this. I hope this helped. Have a great day.

    • @AFuller2020
      @AFuller2020 3 роки тому +2

      And yet, everyone probably blames you....BTDT, go overseas, I did.

    • @ahmedcheikh3082
      @ahmedcheikh3082 3 роки тому +1

      @@iamrockness u need some red pill wisdom

    • @iamrockness
      @iamrockness 3 роки тому +2

      @@ahmedcheikh3082 way ahead of you. I got therapy, started hitting the gym and eating clean, looked up guides to be a strong successful male, earned back my self respect, learned the nuance to women, studied stoic and taoist philosophy, and am now red pilled. I don't need nor want a woman for my happiness. After this arduous journey, I am much happier internally than I ever was. I dodged a great bullet, and I'm thankful for my freedom and all the babes I can talk to for free. Life is good.😎👌🏽

    • @aliibrahim1001
      @aliibrahim1001 3 роки тому +1

      Wow you just described what my recent broken relationship of 10 years was, word for word! Its so difficult to process everything and live a life like the past 10 years never existed..

  • @sanguineel
    @sanguineel 5 місяців тому +1

    Thank you for sharing this

  • @brandiew7611
    @brandiew7611 Рік тому +44

    As a mom of four, and a person with a son myself, it really breaks my heart that she said those things to you-- you're clearly a very smart, strong person. I wish you the very best and continued success in all your endeavors.

  • @77moonwalker77
    @77moonwalker77 3 роки тому +86

    What a horrible experience. She was most definitely emotionally abusive.

    • @timsteinkamp2245
      @timsteinkamp2245 3 роки тому +2

      I'll comment to you but it could have been many others. It is life and no foul done. It is just an experience he had and shared. I didn't see him looking for sympathy. Something I learned is to never take sides in people's relationships because they may kiss and make up.

    • @DX-d
      @DX-d 3 роки тому

      Are you kidding! she was the only one working & spending money ON HIM?!!! And for YEARS?!! Unbelievable.
      And he says now that he doesn’t want to be a provider for a woman!! Pathetic. No one in their right mind would be with a loser that takes money from women.

    • @mateuszmazurek7991
      @mateuszmazurek7991 3 роки тому

      ​@@DX-d Why is this any worse than a man spending money on his wife and working? That's MARRIAGE!

  • @sam.0021
    @sam.0021 4 роки тому +210

    i cant think of a more real and down to earth youtuber than you bro. thank you for spreading your message and your story. it has helped me and countless others.

    • @JoshuaFluke1
      @JoshuaFluke1  4 роки тому +10

      Sure thing, but don't go to jail.

  • @localstrangeness
    @localstrangeness 3 роки тому +1

    This was a wonderful video. We're with you man. So many of us have learned the hard way.

  • @damienbates
    @damienbates Рік тому

    Thanks for sharing brother. Wishing you all the best!

  • @SiaarZH
    @SiaarZH 4 роки тому +113

    Josh being real the most wholesome thing on youtube. So many people "fake it till they make it" and keep faking afterwards too, because they never knew how to be real.
    Kudos Josh. You broke the algorithm and you're making (my) world better.

  • @RabidPrimeape
    @RabidPrimeape 4 роки тому +410

    To be real with you, it went from 0 to 100 because she found someone else. She called you a sex addict because she was behind your back.

    • @mikecantreed
      @mikecantreed 4 роки тому +126

      Nailed it. It's called projection.

    • @justaprogrammer3764
      @justaprogrammer3764 4 роки тому +29

      omg ghis comment burns. was in a similar situation and you're right

    • @lavish_1717
      @lavish_1717 4 роки тому +5

      Arv'ceo
      OmG this happened to my friend. Your comment is so accurate.

    • @kallepikku4991
      @kallepikku4991 4 роки тому +8

      Hahaha.... some Finnish bluntness right there! LMAO

    • @joekettering2151
      @joekettering2151 4 роки тому +13

      Guaranteed that if you had been an a-hole to her, she never would go anywhere. I've had to learn the hard way over time that that's what they respond to. It makes sense, biologically. We've just been groomed to treat them like queens, open doors for them, pay for meals, spoil them in general. The problem is that they haven't been groomed to appreciate what we do for them, to return the favor in any way whatsoever, or just treat us like men and take care of us the way we take care of them.

  • @KitNKitty
    @KitNKitty 3 роки тому +1

    I love your honesty. It’s so refreshing. It takes a lot to be that open, vulnerable and speak about such a painful time in your life. I’m so happy that you got out of that toxic relationship and are doing so well for yourself. Never give up. Never stop trying to better yourself and your station in life. You have a new sub because of this video. Keep being honest and doing you. ❤️

  • @mountmeron267
    @mountmeron267 3 роки тому

    Wow 👏 Thank you for sharing. You are healing so many people through sharing your pain and victories.🙏

  • @Donamtrx
    @Donamtrx 3 роки тому +277

    Crying doesn’t make you weak. It takes courage to cry out loud. It makes you human.

    • @sugarcoma7662
      @sugarcoma7662 3 роки тому +6

      I love your comment

    • @PatrickSmith-hv1um
      @PatrickSmith-hv1um 2 роки тому

      U only weak as a Man when u dont scream out Loud to GOD with tears Bro

    • @Nihilist_Waltz
      @Nihilist_Waltz 2 роки тому +5

      I'm not sure. I still remember the first time I cried infront of my ex, and she laughed. Probably best to do that alone...

    • @xoxoJGWS
      @xoxoJGWS 2 роки тому +3

      @@Nihilist_Waltz i can imagine that wasnt a good experience.. your emotions are valid tho, and there are people out there that would like to comfort you instead of laugh :)

    • @Nihilist_Waltz
      @Nihilist_Waltz 2 роки тому +4

      @@xoxoJGWS Thank you. I appreciate the sentiment genuinely. However in general, when it comes to relationships dynamics between the sexes. As a man, you are expected to be the rock. If you're with a woman, and you start to become emotionally vulnerable wih her, she is hard wired to lose attraction for you. I understand that everyone is an individual, and has individual preferences, but if you tell men it's okay to cry in front of your girl, you're setting the guys up for failure.

  • @Skychupie
    @Skychupie 3 роки тому +189

    My goodness...you seem so sweet. This just sounds horrible. She was laughing at you when you're crying. I'm sorry but that's just a new level of evil.

  • @ChemEngineeringEntrepreneurs

    Amazing story! Thanks for sharing!

  • @Robiuche
    @Robiuche Рік тому +1

    Thank you for sharing this!! ❤️

  • @mireliom
    @mireliom 4 роки тому +57

    I laughed , cringed, empathized, and wasn’t surprised all at once.

    • @pauls4742
      @pauls4742 4 роки тому

      Yup!... the voice of experience.

  • @tellurye
    @tellurye 4 роки тому +92

    Shes crying and screaming at you, then 4 seconds later she is laughing .... yeah, sounds like a psycho, dude. WTF?

    • @JustNodIfYouCanHearMe77
      @JustNodIfYouCanHearMe77 4 роки тому +9

      Nope. Just sounds like typical Finnish woman

    • @gmeister03
      @gmeister03 4 роки тому +1

      Typical

    • @minglee9288
      @minglee9288 4 роки тому

      @@JustNodIfYouCanHearMe77 *most

    • @donnalangley117
      @donnalangley117 4 роки тому +5

      @@JustNodIfYouCanHearMe77 sounds like my ex husband.. so it happens in both sexes. People are crazy.

    • @winning3329
      @winning3329 4 роки тому +10

      The real problem is men just marry women soley on looks then get disappointed when she turns out to be a nut job.
      You men always chase the bad girls and turn your noses up at the good women just because they ain't hot.

  • @Dezzo0721
    @Dezzo0721 Рік тому +8

    Watching this 3 years after you posted this, and this story telling is very valuable to me as a 21 year old man wanting to be with a Dutch Woman from the Netherlands. Also im from the south of the US, studying mechanical Engineering and wanting to move in together in the Netherlands, and also failing many of my classes. I am terrified

  • @cyberkumo
    @cyberkumo Рік тому

    Thank you for sharing this experience.

  • @avalerionbass
    @avalerionbass 4 роки тому +216

    I was in a 5 year relationship with someone I thought I was going to marry. Turns out I was delusional and she was a gas-lighting sociopathic narcissist. The pain was real, but talk about dodging a bullet.

    • @StoicContrarian
      @StoicContrarian 4 роки тому +8

      Derek Ball fellow musician; excellent. Been married 11 years; playing guitar is the only thing that wards off the depression.

    • @crystalianike
      @crystalianike 4 роки тому

      Me too! i dunno now who is my soulmate is just living best life now.

    • @lavish_1717
      @lavish_1717 4 роки тому +1

      trojan
      Same! When I see my friends in miserable relationships, I’m like damn I’ve been blessed to be single lol

    • @eminemilly
      @eminemilly 4 роки тому

      @@StoicContrarian I appreciate you comment I'm struggling but I am getting back into guitar

    • @KirstenMarie_MS3
      @KirstenMarie_MS3 4 роки тому +1

      @@crystalianike There's no such thing as "soulmate." We aren't living in a fairytale or some sappy RomCom.

  • @Harry-nn4px
    @Harry-nn4px 4 роки тому +183

    "A poor man may marry but his wedding night is short."
    (Old Russian proverb).

    • @taylorj6177
      @taylorj6177 4 роки тому +2

      I fuckin love it

    • @user-ee8cq9jt3y
      @user-ee8cq9jt3y 4 роки тому +1

      Which means?

    • @cx777o
      @cx777o 4 роки тому +23

      @@user-ee8cq9jt3y if you got no money, you get no honey (in this case no pussy)

    • @bitzartdev
      @bitzartdev 4 роки тому +24

      I am actually russian and I am seeing this for the first time in my life

    • @Harry-nn4px
      @Harry-nn4px 4 роки тому +6

      @@bitzartdev I read the expression in an Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn book some 35 years ago. He was using it as a metaphor for something in his musings that I long ago forgot. The literal meaning, however, stayed with me and is applicable to the poor boy's misadventure in Finland.

  • @bretonvikanderakabret4468
    @bretonvikanderakabret4468 Рік тому +3

    I appreciate your candor. We have very similar relationship/divorce/family circumstances. It's quite difficult. It changes you forever, and you will never figure the relationship or her out. It's all quite extraordinary, actually. I'm very sorry.

  • @studiojavakhan9547
    @studiojavakhan9547 7 місяців тому +1

    Our story made me realise how much of a safety net I always had. Thanks you for sharing it.

  • @OhVictoria
    @OhVictoria 3 роки тому +417

    What a kind & patient human being you are. Wow. We don’t stop and think that men get abused this way just as women do. Just, wow.

    • @paigelovette8156
      @paigelovette8156 2 роки тому +1

      THAT PART.

    • @75Cee
      @75Cee 2 роки тому

      I agree with you.

    • @drakelondon6849
      @drakelondon6849 Рік тому

      Haters gonna hate and betas gonna bate.

    • @Krbydav328
      @Krbydav328 Рік тому +5

      and why don’t women think about the abuse they do to men?

    • @suzannekeil3170
      @suzannekeil3170 Рік тому +1

      Aww that’s sounds so harsh, really sorry you went thru that ❤

  • @GearZNet
    @GearZNet 4 роки тому +202

    “I will not be friend zoned by my wife!” 😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @benjisea
      @benjisea 4 роки тому +4

      GearZNet sad. Bad position to put himself into

    • @APPi711
      @APPi711 4 роки тому +15

      MGTOW

    • @SaraFJones
      @SaraFJones 4 роки тому +7

      Hannibal L yes, please go your own way and stay that way to spare people.

    • @IronTeddyBear
      @IronTeddyBear 4 роки тому +10

      Unfortunately, as a divorced guy, it always comes down to this. Women lose interest in sex much sooner than men.

    • @Gravitywalker20
      @Gravitywalker20 4 роки тому +5

      @@SaraFJones MGTOW is growing every year there, hoss. Plenty of "people to spare."

  • @brigitteprince5402
    @brigitteprince5402 3 роки тому

    Josh, so crazy our stories are SO SIMILAR! So glad I found you!

  • @LosBlancoo
    @LosBlancoo 2 роки тому +1

    So much respect to you, I've learnt so much from you. Keep pushing on, you're so strong 💙💯

  • @leonidassabr9197
    @leonidassabr9197 4 роки тому +434

    JOSH I JUST WANNA SAY FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART. THANK YOU FOR MAKING THIS VIDEO. IT WILL HELP ALOT OF MEN

    • @madanydiallo5220
      @madanydiallo5220 4 роки тому +2

      Leonidas Sabr it sure helped me out. I know it’s not the same thing but I’ve been dating this girl for 4 years and we just recently broke up and it’s crazy how similar the stories sound.

    • @NTJedi
      @NTJedi 4 роки тому +1

      @@madanydiallo5220 Basically people change as time passes because of events, friends and genetics. Some people change for the better and some people change for the worse. This means the lady of your dreams today can become the witch of your nightmares in the future. MGTOW is the best path which protects your career, everything you earn and you can still raise a family safely.

    • @infulleffect5930
      @infulleffect5930 4 роки тому +3

      Just interested- how you gained so much weight although you had no money to buy food?

    • @nadirsaleh7839
      @nadirsaleh7839 4 роки тому

      I needed to hear this, I totally relate to this..

    • @mmanda515
      @mmanda515 4 роки тому

      Absolutely was emotional/psychological abuse (even financial).... & doesn't just happen to men. Glad he made it out of there, with a degree, with what seemed like a great job offer & most importantly imho, without children being involved, having to pay the ultimate price. Stay safe & be well. #DoctorRamani (channel everyone should watch to know the red flags BEFORE......if not to help themselves, perhaps a friend being sucked in & manipulated to ignore those red flags) #DARVO "B.A.I.T.E.R.S"

  • @vikumwijekoon3166
    @vikumwijekoon3166 3 роки тому +569

    This dude has gone through everything possible in human life. Why arent you like 70 already man?

    • @kehindeemiabata4032
      @kehindeemiabata4032 3 роки тому +41

      If you think thats everything in life, you havnt lived.

    • @poetaenlaluna
      @poetaenlaluna 3 роки тому +5

      He's making up a lot of stuff just so you know.

    • @madambutterfly7513
      @madambutterfly7513 3 роки тому +12

      A lost love, is not going thru everything in life!! How old are you, 12????

    • @starlight-jr3ge
      @starlight-jr3ge 3 роки тому +14

      @@madambutterfly7513 if this were a woman speaking you would be saying‘you go girl!’

    • @ayoiawe
      @ayoiawe 3 роки тому +6

      @@madambutterfly7513 are u new to the channel. The comment wasnt based on just this failed marriage video.