Detoxifying Masculinity Ft Rix Poet | Episode 138
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- Опубліковано 30 кві 2024
- The one where we deep dive into the world of masculinity yep you heard that 👀👀
We believe that being a man isn’t about conforming to the outdated stereotypes.
For this episode we’re joined by Rix Poet, a mental, sexual and reproductive health activist and guys everything about masculinity we thought we knew …OUT THE WINDOW !!! 🤣🤣
We’ll be diving into how we can create a culture that celebrates men for who they truly are, not who society tells them to be…
Let’s be open enough as we enjoy this ep cause it’s definitely not like any other
WARNING ‼️ This episode may challenge you a bit TOO much 🫡
Find Rix Poet through the link below
rixpoet?igs...
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INSTAGRAM
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Lydia KM - _lydiakm?...
Murugi Munyi - murugi.munyi?ut...
TIKTOK
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Murugi Munyi - / murugimunyi
One more thought I'd like to add onto this discourse: it is said that men and women have defined roles and that these roles are natural. But more often than not we don't realize all of us play the same roles in different capacities to ensure survival and joy.
For example: where as we say men are providers and protectors and leaders, we view these roles mostly from a conditioned narrow point of view that these things have to look a certain way. But even as men take up these roles, women also provide and protect and lead.
The majority of farmers in Africa are women. That's provision. Women giving birth; how don't we ever look at that as provision? They're ensuring that the next generation is born and our species survives. Isn't that provision? When tragedy happens and they get to congregate to organize themselves by cooking and peacemaking during conflict, isn't that leadership?
When you zoom out, what's hurting us is believing that there is only a linear lens to view the gender roles that we have created on this earth. Once we start seeing our differences are only biological for most parts, and begin understanding our connections and the roles we play in them intertwine, we'll stop facing each other with these impractical expectations.
A man, if he does his inner work properly, can only define masculinity for himself. He cannot define himself by copying other men's masculinities and claim to be living his life. He simply will be a copy of another man's ideas. I know our cultures encourage that. But at the bottom of things, you have to find your own path, even if you relate with others who match your energy.
Thiiiiis. I always try and tell people that when it comes to gender roles seeing it how we are taught or how we see is not an end all be all situation
Thanks so much for sharing truly you are an changing the narratives .
Riiiiix🔥🔥😀My mind is blown, my mindset is challenged and my entire being. I love this so much
@@patiencebarasa550 🥰🥰
This was a beautiful day of conversation. May we all continue looking into ourselves and dig dig dig, until we reach the center, where definitions unite us more than they separate us.
Thank you for the invitation. It’s definitely TMI! ♥️🌻
Excuse me, sir, the tables you're shaking have expensive drinks😅. Are we ready for this conversation? I love this so much.
I really love how diverse TMI is with their conversations. But i feel like its so difficult to see men outside of provision and financial responsibilities because they do not build other aspects of their lives that would enable to show up in a relationship without being a liability. I was listening to a certain woman who was saying that after her husband lost his job, he seemed lost because the only way he showed up for his family was by paying school fees, rent, buying food, etc. I understand that men do this because this is the version of them that is normally rewarded by the society. The value and worth of men is measured by how heavy their wallet is. So for me i think that this is a two way street, where men diversify the aspects of their life and women and society in general embrace and reward that. ❤❤❤❤ TMI
Favorite guest so far👌He definitely has to come back to talk more about; how knowing how to cook and clean is a basic human thing and not just something a woman has to do for a man. Also knowing how to cater for yourself(financially )is also a human thing and not something a man has to do for a woman
Vayulence😂😂
Someone once told me; Imagine the things you know now, you didn't know or never heard of. And you knew something totally different, how would you live your life?
What was the answer?
😂😂i guess better
It's the girlies taking deep breaths and sighing for me😅
The kids query, former generations could get away with "just wanting kids" and do minimal parenting. Today, kids actually need you to parent, as they are navigating a whole lot. So the question should evolve from "do you want kids" to "do you want to PARENT?" Great guest.
Great perspective 👏
Love this.
This is a very interesting perspective. I am currently sitting on the fence and really questioning myself on whether to have kids or not. Asking myself if "I want to Parent" as opposed to " do I want kids" has allowed me to look at this situation from a very different and deeper angle. Thank you for sharing.
In all ways, I am glad I watched this. It almost feels illegal to watch for free.
Gems after Gems! This was just SPECTACULAR❤
Ikr!
This conversation was EXACTLY what I needed to hear as a masculine, dominant woman .. thank you for giving space for gender fluidity and understanding
Why "masculine ", I don't think you should class yourself as masculine. You are a woman, and every character you have is fine. Who says that certain qualities are "masculine " they should stop limiting us as women . You are perfect the way you are ❤ .
Lydia you are glowing eiiish.
Never paused an episode to think!!!Pheew,This is was such an enlightening episode.To think that there are parts of us that we don't know about yet( including our brains lol),and we have so much potential to connect to is just amazing.This speaks so much volume to self growth and self Development.
Its really The Messy Inbetween😂, Shaken to my core, but definitely loved this conversation.
This has been the most quiet TMI episode. 😂😂. Thank you… love you❤️
He talks so calmly with confidence 👍🏾
Why am i just seated here... really waiting and crossing my fingers for every minute Rix drops his gems so i can see the girls' reactions 😅 (their reactions are priceless) but anyway, i really enjoyed the conversation. As a young male counterpart, this was really insightful.
Ghaaai kwani huyu anakuanga a real person. 😮Ive always listened to his poems thinking they are written by chat gpt or something😅😅😅
This conversation is compicated as it was so focused on the negative aspects of what masculinty can be which I feel as man I can accept their some bad thing which toxic masculinity has brought but at the same masculinty for example a sense of responsibility that as he needs to be hardworking he needs put himself out there because as much as it is your own life in reality their will always be people relying on you whether that be your wife, your mum, your friends and so on. Other aspects such as a masculinty urges you to protect those around you. So in the conversation of toxic masculinty we also need to keep in mind that toxic masculinty is also an extreme of plain masculinty
Allow me to challenge this because I am inclined to think that the point of the conversation was missed once you phrase your point like this. The conversation on masculinity was allowing people, in this case men, to be who they want to be to the best of their capacity instead of curving the path out for them. His focal point from what I've gathered was that men, and human beings by extension can play whichever role they want to play and that we should not live in the confines created which limit us. By you feeling that you need to be responsible for your wife, child, mother and so on and so forth, is fine but it doesn't have to be that. A perfect example is the guest, he even said he has no intentions of having kids. So are they masculine urges that you genuinely have within or is it what you are choosing based on external factors. If they're genuine then understand that it's to you and that's fine but it doesn't have to be so for each and every man. It's not a do or die scenario and we should look within to see whether we ACTUALLY want to play the roles we imagine we should based on our most inner selves or it's perpetuated onto us by societal and cultural norms i.e. gender, which is more often than not the latter.
@@shitakimushrooms seems like the shitaki mushrooms are doing their job. wewewe I salute you
@@EmmeGee_M 😂😂
Thank you very much, I appreciate it 🫶🏾
I love, love, how Rix Poet is conversant with his family history (genealogy) and its impact on his life. Being able to understand the family system and society to become this man we see before us? Mad respect.
The conversations held on this platform are so life changing ❤️ I'm definitely a TMI babe for life🥂
What an intellectual. There has never been more silence on TMI. This was a great thought provoking conversation. Great job.
Thought piece, pregnant women and mothers need providers and protectors that's why they are naturally attracted to masculinity, what will be the role of the man in the house then, cause the woman will still have to be pregnant, labor, and nurture, I see this narrative as further oppression
You said it all👏
But, do they really provide? In reality the last generation that fully provided for their women, are our grandparents. The generation born from before 1950. Thereafter, women have not really got provision and protection in the traditional sense, or as you seem to define it from your comment. Pregnant women and mothers have always worked and without provision or protection from men, but we still stick to thinking about it from a traditional perspective, while the reality is not.
I get your point but that is a sad reality not really a flex, I think we should be advocating for men to take on their responsibility because if not, women now has to do it all which we all know is oppressive, why do we have to subsidize men's responsibilities in a system that literally favors them? Being a man is hard but so is being a woman. Let everyone do their job.
Just choose a partner based on your values, expectations.... Don't box everyone!
We need him baaack! For a two-hour dilemma and Q/A episode!! Love love loveed this mind boggling episode!!❤❤
I now see why i was avoiding this episode....i see why...i know why...
Samee😂😂 it's really shaking tables fr
It's the silence for me... Joan is quiet 😄😄😄. I'm so triggered. I'd listen to this man all day.
I am speechless 😢 This guy answered many of my interrogations about life 🤞🧡😉
Lydia this dress is🔥🔥🔥 you look amazing!
Rix is very poised and his voice is very soothing 👌👌 plus he oozing wisdom #masculinity
First I agree with some of the things he said about labouring in romantic relationships. However, I feel like if you are guy and you are listening to the other ideologies he has you will be misled.
This kind of reasoning is as a result of the chaos that our brother went through. No one chooses where they were born but we are all a summation of the experiences life has served us.
I liked what Joan and Lydia said about when its your own son it hits different. The reason Joan is feeling the way she feels is because some of these views rix has are not normal.
Men, please embrace masculinity, but not in this way. Anyway good watch.
Right on time🥳 Thank you TMI podcast for this! I love every bit of this discussion when Rix Poet talks, you just have to listen and your thought process provoked. I also love the openness of this conversation. I admire his courage a lot🥳
As an aunt I babysit my nephews most the time and there was a time one of them picked the broom and started sweeping and then went to the kitchen eti he’s washing the dishes. I don’t know what devil possessed me but I heard myself saying “ what are you doing in the kitchen are you are girl?” It was completely unconscious. I was even shocked I said that. To think I’ve always been a feminist and believed women are more than just cooks etc I literally indirectly insinuated that the boy shouldn’t be in the kitchen coz he’s not a woman therein women belong in the kitchen 🙊🙊🙊🤦🏽♀️ the programming is real🚶🏾♀️
The first step is to recognize this. I would be so shocked if I said this as well but i also know it is possible for me to actually say this.
What an Episode 👌
This was fascinating 🤩
I like when Jo hypothesizes that she would worry if her own son were targeted for being different..
To add onto what Rix said, I think that most times, the parents who worry so much about it usually have nothing to worry about coz their children are probably not different per se. In most experiences, when the situation is there, you kinda just navigate it naturally.
My only problem with people who don't conform to the norm is they all have traumas mostly fron childhood. Am i wrong to say they also have been conditioned by these wounds they have to be who they currently are? And if all these didn't happen would they still say all these?
Or maybe the wounds make them see the world in a different lens and question stuff. Those who have no wounds are okay with it coz it works for them. When you have wounds you are forced to question and grow
You have a problem with someone being open minded? Everybody goes through trauma it's just that some people repress their feelings and some choose to live with the feelings.
I love love love this episode. And definitely learnt alot ❤ thank you TMI
Love love 💓
It's definitely TMI❤
Thank you for the powerful insight girls❤
I love all TMI episodes...but THIS ONE,THIS ONE!!!!He definitely said it well
Mind blown. Thank you so much for this❤
Jo in her British accent element: Lydia you got some notes? You got notes?
Learnt a lot from this episode❤️
I truly enjoyed this episode. We need more of such conversations.
This was a very eye opening conversation. Thanks to you guys
The way I had to pause a number of times and just take a breath he!
THIS EPISODE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Much needed conversation. The rawness was tangible.
brilliant episode. what an amazing guest.
He delivered it soo well and calm....humans are part of nature....we exist in all diversities
Just here waiting for my order listening to this masterpiece ❣️
Here for this conversation
Rix is very intelligent. This was great episode
I could listen to Rix all the time ..he is intelligent
interesting conversation ❤
7 minutes in and oh so powerful 🔥
Thought-provoking and intentional I Loved the discussion.
definitely my favourite episode....thank you for this conversation
We preach what we know and act who we are.
Great lesson
Yay🎉🎉. It's Definitely TMIIIIIIII everywhere ❤❤💃🏿. Just from watching you warembo on the #SNS episode. Lyd's legs🔥.
#WCW❤
It would be interesting to also hear from other men/ panelists and also understand how science comes into play
Now this is a whole new world.....this convo is is truly mindblowing.Challenged my core😮
Wisdom!!!!
This should have been a series🔥🔥🔥❤️❤️❤️🎯
The quality of this video is fireeee
I am just 15mins in but wow wow 🎉
I was not really ready for this conversation but I am glad I stuck it out for the challenge 🤔😂💪thanks for this introspective conversation 👍🙌👌
Great choice for a guest, ladies! I love how thoughtful Rix's answers were
This episode was mind-blowing 🎉...tell me why I listened to it twice on Spotify and here I am.❤
Kudos to taking conversations to the next level
It's definitely TMI
Hey Girls❤️
Heeeeey 😍
I knew onyango years ago when he was hosted by tuko & I have followed him since then
I thank God that we have this information and exposure as gen Z because I found myself agreeing with him so easily and I literally love that we are redefining things to let everyone be free. An amazing episode🤗
I loved this episode so much. On the sprinkle sprinkle part its not always that someone is suffering while am being sprinkled on surely😅😅.. He generalized sprinklers to be married men only
Oh this gentleman❤
It's definitely TMI.
I'm definitely not ready for this conversation....but let me keep watching. 😅
I also wasn't ready to watch it, have kept postponing it till today😂😂😂 weeeuh there are a lot of things to unlearn for sure
He needs to come back,such a wise man.
May God the king of kings bless all the men who want to be providers to their wives and children with the necessary tools to do so.Amen
This was so scary for me.Are we ready for such conversations
❤❤
This was super informative and very eye opening
Just on time❤️
🎉🎉
This guy has definitely read the untethered soul by Michael...but really at the end of the day you got to believe in something as long as it works at the same time being open minded to change when necessary
Onyango Otieeeennnnnooo❤❤❤❤ kumbe unajuana na hawa waschana...I'm so happy to see you here
Haha! Marafiki zangu hawa warembo.
Am early today...yeeeeiii🎉🎉
😍
You guys look amazing 😍
Lydia do you have a date after coz unaglooow👌🥰
There's a large childfree community in this country...I'm sure he'll find someone
Oh absolutely. I'm cf too. Plenty of us out here. 😊
My first time being here🎉
Rix if youu are watching this, I love you bro, this is illuminating
♥️🌻
That person challenging what I believe in are they doing that with what they believe in?
I’ve got so much to say but all I’ll say is you all could have chosen someone else to talk about this topic. After visiting his platform I don’t think he’s inspirational at all! I think he can be informing but not in an inappropriate way. Hate to be harsh, but someone’s gotta say it.😘
❤
Yooooooh!!!! This episode was WILD!!!! No time stamp can even be pinned .... The whole EPISODE was just butt shit crazy.... #feeling triggered 🥵💗
I honestly feel all these who don't conform to any norm, have a childhood trauma.. I'm always tempted to ask what if all those traumas never happened?
Good conversation though
I do too. When someone says they don't want a husband I ask myself the same and I always see where it stems from. As a woman who doesn't conform to so many norms, I can also see where it all stems from but I don't see how I could have it otherwise. Sometimes I wonder if everything really does happen for a reason. There are people who say we choose our experiences before coming here (on earth) and that experiences are meant to help our souls grow apparently.
Yes instead of him going to therapy he's pouring the child with the bath water. Being masculine comes with natural responsibilities like being a dad which he wants to avoid.
@@LuxuryDazzleRingssays who? Why must everyone become a dad or a mother?
Jo leo umenyamaza 😂.
This was a good conversation. Enyewe our parents had a lot going on. I wish they had the opportunity and tools to parent so much better.
Wonderful! Gender roles are socially constructed and almost always benefit the party that dreams up these roles. (side note...It is pronounced NIECE as in Pee + niece. P as in pen, E as in sheep, N as in name, I as in ship and S as in say. Just saying....)
Invite me to debate this guy. TMI, Timid Minds Podcast
Bring him back.
question, is violence the reason that makes you avoid being masculine? Is violence the norm? If its not the norm, you should change yourself not the world. Not wanting kids is okay, if it's not founded by the basic fact you don't want masculine responsibilities that you expected your dad to have instead of being violent.
What does being masculine even mean?
our brains are plastic?? stop, elastic maybe 🤣 we wil start asking for plagiarism
✊✊❤
Love love this!!!!!!!!!
On a side note, Lydia has gorgeous legs!