8 signs: 1. They are only there if they need something 2. They don’t follow through promises 3. They make you watch what you say (use fear to control) 4. They always assume you’re paying 5. They’re only nice if they need you 6. Your loved one are worried 7. They never say thank you 8. You begin to dislike them Note: relationship should be two way streets!
#3 should read: "They make you watch what you say." You have a typo & what you have typed doesn't make sense. You typed: "They make you watch *like you say* (use fear to control)"
Having gone through it recently, NOW I know and understand my boundary is if some one tells a lie. That's it, am done with you. (She was lying to her TWIN sister!) And my gut already told me NO to dealing with her in any fashion!
I totally agree, there’s nothing that hurts more, I also want to say that I just recently started listening to this channel and it’s been so helpful to know that there are others going through the same things I am, and all the great advice is a definite plus, Thank You
It's my family and im the scapegoat. I didn't think it will pass, i was born to be this pathetic and evil creature. Everything i do and not do will always be me, i don't think i can live longer in my life..
One thing I have observed over the years is If you are a "people pleaser," the USERS will recognize this characteristic in you and try to take advantage of it. These "USERS" can be your friends, relatives, schoolmates, coworkers, etc... Pleasing other people can be very exhausting. I get so sick of it when certain people only call you because they need something from you. Otherwise they would never bother you at all. Over the years I have learned to say "NO." Of course there needs to be a balance. I think the key is distinguishing the difference between USERS and people that you can trust.
Exactly. Wish this was taught in schools. For the most part as kids, we’re taught to be nice, help others, and turn the other cheek, etc but it actually sets you up for failure when you come of age and people start to take advantage of your kindness.
I am or used to be a people pleaser, always seeking for recognition. That is so sad... I’m so glad I managed to change that behaviour in me. Also I have to add in this comment that you are TOTALLY RIGHT in your statement!!!!
Actually, there is something much worse. Staying with that person anyway and continuing to be abused. Sadly, it happens all the time. I’ve seen entire lives ruined for decades. Right in my own family.
When you're watching this only so that you don't ever use someone intentionally or unintentionally... Because you know how much of an impact it can have on someone
True points in your video. Some people will pretend to care about you, but get angry at the least little thing you say or do, to control you and the relationship with their anger and manipulation games.
1- they're only there when they need help 2- they don't follow through on promises 3- they make you watch what you say 4- they always assume you are paying 5- they're only nice when they need to be 6- your loved ones are worried 7- they never say thank you 8- you begin to dislike them
Summary 0:56 they are only there if they need something 1:32 they don't follow through promises 1:57 they make you watch what you say 2:34 they always assume that you are paying 2:56 they are only nice when they needed you 3:26 your loved ones are worried 3:59 they never say thank you 4:31 you begin to dislike them
Sharma ji I think everyone needs this video, even the one who does this so that they can see the damage that they do to sOmEoNE and realize how bad they are!
In my opinion, when it comes to dealing with manipulative or generally toxic people, the absolute best thing you could possibly do is be absolutely shameless with what you say or do. Don't fear what they might think of whatever you say. When I was being manipulated, I decided to completely disregard their opinion and broke the friendship. Don't take whatever I say seriously tho. This is just what worked for me
Why not take it seriously? This is great advice. Do not take their shit. Someone trying to manipulate you? Give them your darkest self. You are right for standing up for yourself. Do not fear anything they will do or say, stand your ground. You do not even need to explain this to others, protecting yourself is important, do not be fooled into thinking you are bad for stoping an evil person. You are good, you deserve better, do not accept anything less.
A neighbor commented on the happy improvement in her finances, and then she said, "I didn't mean that the way it sounds." It seemed clear and understandable to me. If you're a low-maintenance person, it can be tricky to recognize one-way friendships.
Ive noticed that too man non of this bull crap of narcissitic type people I noticed walk past me, next thing we see people explore abandoned places and we see the ghost of the narcissistic person 😆. Ok jokes aside lol, they are among us in most places and situations, Ive met nice people its the narcs that worry me
True, but unfortunately some people's users are in the same household. I'm happy for the ones who could get away from those during the pandemic though.
Every friendship I have. There’s such thing as being too nice, don’t be me, don’t fall into the trap. 2 years later (2023) update: People still suck, pick your friends wisely 😅
I’ve been abused financially by a friend and man I gotta tell ya it hurts a lot when you feel like you can’t say no to them I always thought I was “too nice” to even do that but now I know better because of this video thank you so much 🌟 😁
I really like everything about psych2go, the animation is so cute, the voice is so relaxing and joyful and the way they discuss things makes me feel that we're not alone
Definitely! If one person is going through a tough time. You’d be surprise someone else are also experiencing the same thing! What other topics would you like us to cover on? :)
@@Psych2go I don't know though but every time you post something I can always relate, I'm recently struggling with my boyfriend and I'm a little down. Maybe you could do more cover songs or your own songs :) sometimes music can ease up the pain that we're feeling and recently I've been listening to hey Delilah and I really really love that I hope you have a Spotify though cause that would be really really helpful and nice:)
amanda ellorda Aww sorry to hear you’re going through a rough patch. Just remember it’s a temporarily situation and it will pass. Yes, I totally agree with you that music can positively impact us. We also had another cover on Sia. Feel free to check it out :)
@@Psych2go That's so sweet that you guys can respond to comments :) it makes me really happy and loved. Thank you so much continue what you're doing this can save lives and can help them mentally. I'm really proud :)
It took me a while to realize I was being used by two people who I considered friends, they were one-way friendships, at first I was sad, when I realized I was being used, but now I can say that I am thankful, that God removed them, from the path that he is taking me on. It was so hard, because I would try to justify their actions towards me or try to see things a different way, but I have been learning in no way should a friend be used, and a friendship shouldn't be one-sided, and a friendship shouldn't be based on conditions, because I have been learning what I truly deserve, and I don't deserve mistreatment in anyway, sometimes, when people walk out of someone's life, it's not always a bad thing, but it can actually be a blessing in disguise. It is only after people are no longer a part of your life you may have thought were "friends", when you see that they were not really adding to your life, if you find out you have more peace without them being present. The "friends" who I thought were my "friends" taught me some lessons, and I just know I don't ever want to put myself in a situation to be used and mistreated by anyone, no matter how nice they may appear to be.
#2: failure to follow through on promises, is what severely damaged a long term friendship. This former best friend would repeatedly ask if I wanted to go to an event with him (usually a sporting event or a meal) but in at least 6 instances completely failed to follow through and left me hanging. After the last one I had enough and began the process of distancing myself from the relationship. His word meant nothing to me anymore.
One big RED FLAG is when the person in particular sees people as TRANSACTIONS/FINANCIALLY/CONSTANT FAVORS ETC. They don't see you as a human with feelings, only ways to be exploited and used. And not be able to say NO without them going OFF THE RAILS CRAZY. This list can go on forever.
I had a "friend" that would want to go out to eat but then never have enough to cover her portion of the bill or not have enough money to tip. Also, she liked to order really expensive wine and seafood and then would want to go in half when I had a beer and sandwich. The last time we went out when the waitress came to the table I asked for separate checks. This so called friend got upset but still was stuck with paying for her food and tip. I continued asking for separate checks and when she asked why I said it was easier (meaning I only had to pay for what I had) than doing the math at the end of the meal. She ended up getting a huge (at least a million) inheritance and then married a wealthy man. I moved away and we are no longer friends.
When i was in the service my "best friend" from highschool and two friends from church always would hang out. We were very close. After i got back from afghanistan and out of the corps I quickly realized what i had been blind to. It was always me paying for everything. It was always me buying alcohol or paying for dinner or gas. As i started to push back they were very rude and tried to make me out to be the rude one. As if i was the ungrateful one. One even told me that i was being selfish for not being willing to spend my money to travel 4 hours for a day trip to st augustine fl, which i wasnt even employed at the moment. Every single one of them didnt care what i had been through. None of them were interested in supporting me without something in return. They made my depression worsen and i began to lash out over frustration. Its just really dissapointing to lose everything you thought you came home to as far as friends go. Thats a dark place to be. Moral of this litfle piece of history... be aware of those you are close to, and be careful who you lend your heart to. Most people arent in it for you. When you find someone who truely cares about you, it will make the effort that much more worth it and meaningful.
One person give me friendship but l have always to invite or pay for this person....no way is not À real and good friendships....sadly we have to left go this person .....no choise.......good friend not take davantage......
Yup the Drill Instructor always told us when we went back “home” how people would use you and think you were rich. My kill hat put me through hell in the basic but at least she was honest and I had more respect from her then people back “home” too.
Sorry to hear that. The people who are there for you when you have nothing to offer them are the real ones. Unfortunately they are few and far between.
The best thing is to leave that relationship if you can. Most easy is a friendship to leave compared to other types. Leave them . Become a stranger and have them become a stranger
I knew a guy last year that used me for all the nice things I did for him. Bought nice food every week many times and even took him to PR just to have him abuse me two days later when we got back to the city. I couldn’t believe him, how dare him. I was super hurt. But it’s 2023 now and I’m glad he is not in my life anymore 🙏🏽💗
I had a girlfriend who used and manipulated me so much. She told me when we go out she never expects to pay for anything. She would constantly disrespect me and when I expressed disappointment she would pin it on me like I am the wrong one. She would apologize and I would go back only to go through the vicious cycle again and again. Careful with these type of manipulating users. Great insight from the video !
#3 Means you feel like you need to walk on eggs around them. Being on your best behavior constantly. Always waiting for the next shoe to drop. YOU deserve to have friends who love you for who you are. People you can relax and be your Self with. Your true self. Let go of people who judge and criticize you. You are worthy to be loved just for being you. I am sending love and hugs from Washington State, Jeanne of In Loving Hands Counseling and ASMR
100% true, awesome advise. Hindsight is 2020 once you realize. Wish I had more relationships under my belt to sense this but I was blind to it. Thanks a lot, I’m finally moving out this week and moving on to my next chapter!
My toxic friends just ditched me, honestly glad, I don’t want to hang out with them anymore. They’re still coming after my other friends though, I seriously don’t get it. I wonder how long it is until they come for me tbh
Gacha • Grace until you commit suicide. It’s horrible, but it’s the truth. They will only stop when you’ve ended it all, that’s their goal, and you need to avoid everyone involved with them.
Meemah_ SN yep. I honestly don’t get their problem, they started stuff and acting like we’re being moody 😔 we’re just gonna ignore them It’s bad enough I cut the other day because of them..
Gacha • Grace ...jeez... you really need to cut them out. If you can afford it, see counselling, because this is just not ok. Thankfully I was able to escape all the toxic relationships I’ve been in, but I’m no where near close to escaping all the ppl who try to use me, but I can see them coming. Hopefully you get the hope you need, and the respect you deserve by all the ppl in your life, not just your group of friends. And I hope those bitches who tormented you rot
Meemah_ SN I’m desperately trying to cut them out, they keep annoying my friends tho and being mean to them, they really suck. I hope your life is great too 🥺👌
I usually suspect I am being used by someone when I find myself ghosting him or her. In other words, my ghosting that person is my mind's way of telling me that I subconsciously feel used.
@@paulbienvenu5494 Maybe I did not explain the scenario well enough and why I feel used yet I am the one ghosting. How would you feel if I were to behave as follows: I call you up and say, "hey Paul, I have not seen you for a long time. We should meet for coffee. Are you free today after work? Say about 6 pm at Starbucks? You say, "okay, why not?" You get to Starbucks at 6 pm and after buying you a $5 coffee, we sit down and I talk about myself for 2 hours then I tell you, "hey Paul, I hate to do this to you but I need to borrow your car. Mine is at the dealer getting fixed." You then tell me that you need the car for work and I say, "come on man- I thought I could count on you." You give in and I return the car to you two weeks later with an empty tank. Then I do not call you for three months. After three months, I call you again and invite you to dinner- just to "catch up". When you arrive at the restaurant, I am there with another person who I tell in front of you, "this is my friend Paul. Hey Paul, Dave here has a great plan for a line of automatic tuna can openers. This is a great opportunity. Paul, you can provide the capital and Dave will oversee operations. We will give you a 5% cut." You say, "no thanks " and I tell you that I thought you were my friend and I was just trying to help you out by showing you a great business opportunity. No calls from me for months and then I call you again months later and tell you I have tickets to the musical Hamilton and would you like to go. This time, you decline and pretend to have the Bubonic Plague. When I call you three months later, you tell me you cannot meet me because you have leprosy. Now imagine that the situation were reversed and I were you in the above scenario. That is why I am ghosting this person. Now, whom is using whom?
I had a falling out with what proved to be an opportunistic friend last year. She was adept at taking advantage of people's kindness by making them feel sorry for her. When I pointed it out to her, she became angry and wanted to end the friendship; I was glad as she'd taken advantage of me for long enough and I started to dislike her as a result. Watch out for people who take your kindness as weakness, people!
Barbara gray commenting I will certainly say Amen to your comment I lost my husband naturally I'm alone now and it gets lonely I had a friend who wanted her daughter to be companion to me just visit for a couple hours and talk to me and wanted me to pay her for it I thought that was really taking advantage of a bad situation for me and because I've shown kindness in the past I guess they take me to for an easy mark but that is changing I'm beginning to understand their people do use other people, to take advantage of someone because they might be lonely and charge them them, just to sit and talk with you seems a bit of a stretch to me I'm sure I could never do that to anyone it's a very sad thing when we have to come to this in life people want to charge you for kindness.
I feel kind of embarrassed. So many friends in the past used me because I wanted them to like me, especially back when I was a kid. I guess that's when it started.😟
Hi there. I'm sorry, that people took advantage of you. You have nothing to feel embarrassed about. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people in this world, including myself who feel very isolated, and would just like to have a really good friend.. my name is Chrissy. I'm in a wheelchair. I have cerebral palsy. Unfortunately, my circle of friends is very small., I haven't met the right type of people, who would like to stick around and be a permanent friend. I am 45 years old. So far, I have three people, in my life right now, who are considered my friends. 2 of the people, live in BC where I am. My other friend lives in Manitoba. I met her when I was very small. I find it, very strange and unbelievable that this world is so big and yet I can only find three friends who are permanent. In the past, I've had people use me for money, or alcohol. I don't know why, people hurt other people? I was even dumped by friends, because I refused to drink alcohol with them. I also can't do everything that a walking person can do. I was dumped for that reason as well.. that really hurts. I would just like to encourage you and everyone, who feels isolated, to get out in their community. There are a lot of groups and activities you can join. Hopefully, you will meet the right friend for you. I believe, that you are special. And you deserve to be happy. 😊 Don't give up stay strong. That's what I've decided to do as well., 😊👍
@@user-pg1hf2xj9g That kind of friend who sometimes act as you friend and sometimes they act as your enemies. They are not to be trusted. If you share very personal feelings while they are your friends, they will use that facts against you when they are your enemies.
Frienenies are beyond awful. They can do you considerable damage at work. One lady pretended she was my friend to other people. i hardly knew her and didn't particulary like her. One day she gave me a small, inexpensive gift for something kind I had done for her at work. I took it (to be polite, said thanks) and she spent the next month confronting me about it. She'd make a scene in front of colleagues on why I hadn't used her gift. I gave it back. Frienemies are usually women who use another female to game others. They destroy your reputation and undermine your finest characteristics. They get just close enough to poison your well.
Sometimes BFFs only have to number one. We all have people that we know that are acquaintances. We try to keep them positive and all is semi-good. But if you have that one person in your life no matter where they live, that you can either text thsm at 3 AM or call them at 3 AM and they pick up the phone you're doing fantastically. And they don't admonish you for calling. The first words out of their mouth is are you OK. And you can say no. And they will be there for you. Because they know that you will reciprocate. Because you love and respect each other. That is the boundary. Friendships are not something we rack up like a score at a game..And true friends drop everything because they know you will do it for them. So I think you're doing just fine. Have a good weekend. Stay safe on the Fourth of July.
Well I would call them simply manipulators. The just pretend to be your friend when it works in their favor and do anything to make you look bad in front of others. That's the trick. They say they are 'cool' with you, when they are not. They want to destroy your reputation and your connections to others. I have experienced it myself several times. How to get out of this situation when leaving ia no option? The awnser is confrontation. Do not be nice to people trying to ruin your live. Stand up for yourself however this may look like. Make it clear in front of others, that this manipulator is not your friend and do not talk to him, ignore him whenever possible. Do not fear anything coming from this person. Most of the times those people are cowards when everyone turns against them. Speak about to people you trust, gain back confidence.
I can relate to this video. I'm a very giving, kind and caring person but people seem to take advantage of that and use me 😢. I will be careful who I am nice too, wonderful video as always! Love from Canada ❤️
This all happened to me. I got my revenge. Nice people always win. You just need to keep calm and not do nothing rational as painfully as that sounds. Just stand your ground. End the relationship/ friendship. You win. You got your revenge. Good job. :)
When you don't have any close relationships for years and suddenly a person comes into your life and pours gratitude and love for you just with their honey words, you probably lose your mind for them. You can't feel the toxicity of them to just use you for the sake of themselves. They see you just as a resource for them. They don't want to see any good thing about you. This thing can't be realized by you because you crave more love and care from them. Slowly you lose your individuality and become a slave to them. Your dreams will be around them. You made your life depend on their life. Your every act will be intended towards that person. Even if they spoil every aspect of your personal, physical, social, and mental well-being you will revolve around your dream with them. The fear of losing the person who tricks you to consider him/ her to be important in your life shadows their toxicity. You start to support all their shitty acts even if you do know that they are shits. But at one point when things started to make sense, you miserably broke into pieces. You can now understand how badly you are fucked up by him/her. After that point, it is going to be as hard as hell to get yourself back just for you. Your confidence has already been destroyed. So in the initial phase of realizing the truth, your hatred will turn towards yourself. There will always be an option to return back to them and continue to live in day-dream, with their honey words. They will always welcome you genuinely because they don’t want to lose a resource. But as said by wise men, it is your choice that makes every difference in your entire life. You need to struggle to get yourself back. But this struggle is worth it. You are the only solution for the emptiness in you. Be you and engage in stuff that really matters!!! Good luck to every broken heart on the planet!!!
Your "Signs You Have Depression" video helped me learn I have depression. People think it is fake, so even though you're videos are for education, I watch them to cheer up. :>
@@Psych2go this is SO true and i'm disappointed that i always overlook these signs and eventually getting used anyways🙃 even though i know that these are obvious!
A friend I’ve known for 40 years will come see me (we live 300+ miles away) every year around her birthday (this past week). This time I made her a cake and fixed dinner a couple of times and she does not lift a finger to help with dishes. When we went out to eat, she orders and walks away (at deli and coffee shop). Then to top it all off, she sits and is either on her phone talking, texting or on social media most of the time. I’m hurt and fed up. She likes to remind me that none of my other friends come see me, only her. It is really hard to be direct with her because of her outbursts (she is bi-polar) but I’m allowing her to get away with treating me this way. 😢
Thank you for telling me all of these signs I Finally realize I need to cut off people in my life T n T I’ve been used for too long, none of them thought of saying thank you for my support and initiative.
One of the worst feeling is when you realise that someone you love only uses you! I managed to erase a friendship exactly like that. After 5 years of a close friendship with a girl I revised situations and feelings I had in so many occasions that I only wanted to disappear from Earth... Therapy helped me see things through.
Glad you noticed it! :D We all can do a little dance at the end to celebrate that you've watched till the end. Are there any other topics you'd like us to cover on? Let us know :)
i had a friend that i haven't talked to in a really long time. we were working on a project for creative writing together and honestly only came to me when she needed help. she asked me to write the ending for her while she just sat there and watched me fail because i was scared to add my own artistic ideas. she literally shot down almost every single one of them and i hated her for it. she criticized my idea by laughing at it and saying it was too creative. like wha- it's a creative writing class.. when i told her that the teacher had split us up due to me asking, she just said ok and proceeded to brag about her good grades. i ended up leaving her because i realized that her actions were toxic after talking to a few of my writing friends. in the end though, i am glad that i got a better grade on the assignment than her. just proves how toxicity and selfishness and being used can deteriorate your mental and physical health because when i was chatting with her, i was constantly on edge of the harmful things she would say to me. it also lowered my self esteem in my writing and made me question how well my writing actually was.
Ive been through this something very similar and I hope that no one else goes through this because IT SUCKS! Make sure you have friends that make you feel special and beautiful bc that’s what you are
i remember this girl at work would make an effort to talk to me only on the days when she was going to ask me for a lift home...other than that, would barely acknowledge my presence....
1) They wanted me to come in all the time, even when I had plans. 2) How many times have I told friends and family they make promises they never intended to keep? This made me stop trusting them. 3) They lied to me about the boss saying he was thinking of firing me so I can work for them again. I found out the boss never said such a thing. 4) In an ironic way, so when I did, they called me an idiot. 5) Their favourite line: "You know you love me?" 6) Mother was always worried about me, and really despised that person for what they did. 7) They did say thank you, but never meant it. 8) I dislike them. I've never bothered to call them, and they haven't spoken to me since I've left.
Being nice only when you want something is a clear sign other's are taking your kindness for weakness unfortunately in some cases it's very true so be very careful about it 🤔
I learned this the hard way over the years...took many financial losses, been heartbroken, and fell into depression. Once I wised up, got cold and started cutting people off I felt better. Cut a snake off at the head and it'll stop moving PERIOD!!!
👇👇 They Make You Feel Uncomfortable. They Make You Afraid To Say No. They're Only Nice When It's Convenient. They Only Call At Night. They Are All About The Favors. They Create A Sense Of Resentment. They Don't Focus On Your Needs.
@@hiyahiya3491 maybe talk with him that he dont focus your need's? If you helped and focus his need's, and he's not doing it to you back? Maybe he can change
When I was younger, I always tried my best to Please everyone. I was always the one that Invited People and took care of everything. Yes, it was and is Exhausting. I realized how few People return the favor. As I got older, I started to distance myself more and more from Everyone. Now, I usually go out by myself, eat, drink by myself. I find it that I am more at Peace with Myself living like this than how I use to be before.
Man, this is what is happening in our country. Its like the Crab Mentality. People chasing the clout and is super sensitive. They bring down other people for their own progress. Im sorry if i cant rlly explain, and my english is bad. I live in a 3rd world country
We got your back! :) What other topics would you like us to cover on? Don’t forget the more people shares our content the better! It helps support our content. It will gives us the ability to create more content.
literally me when all my friends and family told me 4 months ago that he was super toxic and I thought they couldn’t see what I saw in him and then we got in a huge fight last week and me now trying to get ready to go out with my makeup done watching this video trying not to cry🥺🙄😂🤧
My friend uses me. he uses me when we were done high school/secondary school he just deleted me off all of social media and when he found out I was going to the same college he added me back and then he said “sorry, it was all mental health issues” and now he uses me for favours like going to the shops when he feel likes it but when I do it, every-time he says “I think I’m doing something” and that was also yesterday and now today he is with his Freinds down town and how I know is that his friend took a picture of the town on that day and he was there as-well. So even though I’m gonna be lonely now it’s better then being used by someone.
I have a friend that constantly asks for favors but when I ask for a favor they immediately forget it the next day, I honestly don’t know if it’s toxic or not because they only call me when they want something from me.
Its very depressing though. I have classmates who always ask for my help even if I say that I'm busy. But they'll keep insisting cause they always knew me as someone who's open to help everytime, so once I help them I don't get to finish mine on time. Yet one night, my classmate texted me and said that's its unfair that I finish my schoolworks so fast but they don't know how many sleepless nights and breakdowns I had. I wasn't dissapointed by the fact of her asking for help cause I always help her even let her copy sometimes but at least she could have said thank you instead of saying that I'm unfair... And until now, I still can't bring myself to say how I feel😔
You are not responsible for helping your classmates. You're not the teacher there. It's not your job to help them, you have your own life to worry about.
I do not care about anyone except myself. Until people care about me properly without always excluding me then I have no real feelings towards most people!
This happens to me all the time, but if I do not continue to help them they judge me for not being there for them. I wish they would return the favor but I must do what I can to make their lives easier.
Friends? It’s more like my sister and her husband. We are coming to stay with you, pick us up at the airport, can you make us dinner, can I borrow your car? The list goes on and on, while I’m the one taking care of our parents in their home. She said “Mom you should leave your house to Liz, she’s been taking care of you for 5 years!” I really thought it was about the work I had been doing. I opened my eyes after my Mother died they would come for their visits 4 or 5 times a year from Milwaukee to N.Y. Long Island, to golf the Black at Bethpage. I treated them like royalty but now I’m not longer taking care of my Mom, it’s all about them! I said “Get a car from the airport, I’m not picking you up.” They had a fit! Then they stopped at the grocery store on the way here, did they call to ask if I needed anything of course not. They put their groceries away, and then ask, would you make us diner? Holy shit! Then we go out to eat, my favorite place. My sister “Excuse me waiter can we have separate checks? Did they pick up my dinner? Of course not! My brother in law once told me “ this is like a game to see how much I can get away with!” They wanted me to get the house so they could have a place to stay for free with all the ass kissing that went along with it. Friends??? Not in my case it’s family! That’s just one sister I have another but she and her husband is an entirely different story but still the same crap, they live near by. The whole time I struggled with my Mother they were no where to be found, but when they were around it was,” why don’t you do this, this, and this?” Never lifted a finger and was MIA. I’m done with my family now! They can kiss my ass!
Hello Elizabeth what horrible relations you have , keep them out of your life they are no use they are just users all the way , enjoy your life the best way you can ,im sure you loved your mother and im sure you think of her often , all the very best
👏👏👏....mine aren't my favorite people, right about now either. It's funny how a major death in the family will reveal people you've known your entire life's true character....
@@sugalovely1238 Yes Suga all you have to do is scratch the surface and see what happens and what comes out of the woodwork , so enjoy ur self and have nice times and dont mind those farts they are no use
I spotted signs #1, #2, #3, #5 and #8 in my childhood and adolescence. I learned the hard way that sometimes being nice comes at the expense of your own happiness and well-being. When it gets to the point where everyone starts using your good nature to get what they want from you, it becomes a problem.
All relationship under the superficial surface of "love", all rest on a barter of utility. People are only in your life by the degree of their perceived value of you. Anyone want to challenge this? Simply stop being the utility and see if "love" keeps someone around. Esp men, you are not appreciated for your inherent value as a human being. You are only appreciated for your value attained through personal growth etc. You are loved for WHAT you are, not who you are.
I'm a private duty Nurse and some clients say," I'm paying you so do what i say".... they are rude and I'm starting to cancel care services to these types of clients and carefully choose kinder people to care for whom are respectful and non-controlling 🌿
A friend "ghosted" and used me - still hurting and confused by it. I gave her too much - she gave me too little. When she didn't need me anymore as her 911 friend, she dumped me. I was played - and this realization is hard to process.
Real friends can be one or sometimes two if you are lucky.Those friends are good in good and bad time.If someone calls only when he[she]needs you for something-that does not call your friend.They are just taking advantage of you.I used to have those fake friends for many years in my life and i realize that they are just wasting my time, money, energy and hope.
My bff: Only calls me when she's bored and makes me talk to her for hours Uses my words against me yet says, "It's ok, be blunt" Lied to me and brings up an arsenal of my past wrongdoings instead of admitting Only treats me with respect when she wants me to go out with her or accompany her to hang out with her friends as I am the only friend her mother approves of, if I dont go she cant go. Says I dont care about her if I say no Never apologises My whole family is worried Im starting to wonder why I was so patient with her, and I losing all respect for her. Welp. Time to do something about it. Thanks for this video!
@@naom4naom598 not really because she treats everyone really nice except me because she says that best friends are custom made for each other and that they should be able to handle each othere's darkness
I have female colleague at work who literally wants to be around me when her other friend is not at work. In her friend’s absence she really wanna sit with me, take selfies which I deny, ask me if I wanna tk a break and once her friend is present at work , she isolates me. I did not notice this before but I learned it with time that she is a user. It was evident and frankly my supportive peers notice it and address it with me . Please know the only person who will not use you is God. Everyone else is going to use you to feel better about themselves. Accept it and lose it!
I finally put my foot down with a community service organization that I have been involved with for over 42 years. I have been heading up a fundraising effort since 1999. I have been used and taken advantage of this entire time. I have poured thousands of dollars of my own money into the project, without being reimbursed for my money for expenses. It stops now. I have given notice that I am not doing it anymore. People are always telling me how they think I should run things, but they never want to volunteer to help. People have been rude to me and I am done. Let them figure it out on their own. I have purchased items for this project and they are not getting them. I’m donating everything to the Marines and toys for tots. I deserve respect.
THANK U VERY MUCH I NEEDED THAT!!!!!! I Always thought is was just me but now I finally got it it's not all me well at least that's what my husband says it's all my fault, and he's does just about all of these things u have said. IM IN A UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP I MUST GET OUT NOW.... UR AWESOME keep putting these things out there for people like me who's. Needs and Needs to know how people really r thank u have a blessed day
I have been alway been victim of this (except the paying for money). People plead you for help like there is no tomorrow they are seeing without you. After we help them, all they say is thank you and get on with their life and we stand nowhere. Tried asking for help to people and seen them turning back when I most required their help. I had to let go each and everyone because there was always an expectation from them to help them out whenever needed. I can't carry that burden with me all the time.
My toxic uncle constantly compare me to others and saying that doing this is for my own good. He would ask me to buy/complete a task, and in return he gives me some money/small gifts, but never say thank you. i am the one who say thank you when receiving money/gift as i think it would be rude if i didn't. But turns out that he never wanted to help me/my family at all. All he wants to do it's showing off how successful he is and i can never achieve anything like that. i felt frustrated when figuring out that he is such a toxic person after nearly 20 years. And somehow lost the hope in humanity as he is my mother's brother, but he never wanted to see me succeed. And look down on me all the times. i feel like i am the dumbest person on earth.
You're so right. I have some friends in my life that they can be giving a nice at times but most of the time they don't listen to your pain, they laugh at you, look irritated when you look happy, make fun of you your body, they don't listen when you talk, they're not there when you need them, and they blow you off for quite some time until they feel like talking to you. if you don't do what they want they blow you off or if they're in a bad mood or if they're just feeling insecure or if you don't take the time as soon as you they want you to they blow you off or they're mean to you. That's when I decided to let go
Wow this was totally my last relationship and the picture with her gaming and me doing the dishes, totally fcked my head bc it literally happened to me. When I spoke up about this and wanted to clear things up, she broke up with me, damaging me a bit more mentally. Luckily this video really helped me see more clearly through the fog
I’ve had a friend that I have known for about 6 years now, and I realized throughout the years how much she manipulates, and how toxic she is. I feel like I’ve always done everything for her, she’s never once did something for me. At all. And I’ve given her so much. And she’s always just uses me for they things I have. And when I don’t give it to her she gets mad. And starts to act petty. I’m starting to not hangout with her anymore, but it’s like sometimes she likes me and other days she doesn’t. I have to be a good friend all the time. And I realized that she just takes advantage of the things I give her. and she always makes me feel like I’m the bad person.. always. And I’ve always felt that I would always be the one doing something’s wrong... that’s what manipulation is guys.. you won’t even realize it ..
Thanks so much! A few seconds before this I quit a toxic relationship. Here is a little about myself, I am a young artist and gfx creator, i got these "friends", they claim they will give me currency if i made them something, well i keep making something and they always say actually, I will give you currency after you finish this thumbnail, they were kind at first, but only when i made them a drawing or gfx design, this is the point where i felt manipulated, everything said in this video was what they acted like, thanks so much for helping me remove a ton & pound of pressure on me psych2go, first time a youtube video relived me, underrated content ;)
So true.... my ex friend was using me all the time and asked for money non stop and almost never returned it. When i finally had enough and asked her for my money back she got pissed and now ghosts me. Never said thank you, always expected me to pay for the food, drinks etc... good riddens!
My Heart goes out to you! Don't let this person damage your faith in human nature, there are some really good people out there, hope you find one to befriend! Regards David
"Do me a favor?" Just say NO. Don't ask "what?" Or "Depends on what you ask." NO. No nice person ever begins with "Do me a favor, though." No one nice. When you have something to ask someone to do, how do you do it? Expect that too from a decent human being.
Listening to this has helped me alot, due to the situation im facing now, i think im too weak, and this jus gave strength.....im afraid of regret and guilt and are just not sure what choice to make at this point..........and sometimes i see the right choice staring directly at me, and i let myself down for a millionth time.....u know when u have the feeling that ur doing the right thing and at the same time u feel ur making a wrong move...that's exactly my point here.....i just wish me good luck with the last decision i finally make.
@@Psych2go i just found that since a year i was in a toxic relationship.. This person use to put me down emotionally and also made fun of my job and income and use to talk about his ex and her family and he is like you can't give me 10 lakh also he was like i had 6 girlfriends you are just one of those.. He played with my emotions so much.. And i was there when he wasn't well.. Emotionally and physically.. Always tried ro make him happy.. Hw never ever did even asked me how i am.. Honestly i just want god to give me justice.. I want a right man.. I have so much love in heart but i always get man who is toxic.. I feel dead
Stay strong! You will always be loved and remember your self worth. I hope you are able to walk away in a toxic relationship and keep your head high. The right person will come in your life when the time comes. You got this! 💕
Just a small reminder that you are worthy, that leaving these people will preserve your mental health, that being alone is better than being with a toxic person. Spare yourself the stress of always having to comply to them, spare yourself their exploitation of your fear of rejection, realize that they are abusing the weak spots to exploit you even more, preserve yourself.
![finishing uni assignments - cyber security [brown noise]](/img/n.gif)
Have you ever had a sneaking suspicion that someone might be trying to get the upper hand?
Many times !
Yep. Ditched her, she got mad, drama. High school sucks :/
I had a toxic friend who used me many times , i broke all relations with her this year ....and I'm feeling better ever since :)
please make a Russian version of the channel
a lot but now not
When you "Toughen up" with people...The FIRST people to get offended are the ones who have USED YOU.
🎯🎯🎯
Literally how i feel today.
Ain't that the truth?! I've witnessed this myself.
That is so true.
Especially if the "users" are family members.
8 signs:
1. They are only there if they need something
2. They don’t follow through promises
3. They make you watch what you say (use fear to control)
4. They always assume you’re paying
5. They’re only nice if they need you
6. Your loved one are worried
7. They never say thank you
8. You begin to dislike them
Note: relationship should be two way streets!
True.
That’s exactly what happened to me
#3 should read: "They make you watch what you say." You have a typo & what you have typed doesn't make sense. You typed: "They make you watch *like you say* (use fear to control)"
Also they get very angry when you point out that it has been a one way street.
THIS WAS EXACTLY HOW MY BEST FRIEND WAS LIKE!! She's not my best friend anymore tho. She was really toxic and mean. t-t
When one person does all the giving, and the other does all the taking, that's the only sign you need.
Having gone through it recently, NOW I know and understand my boundary is if some one tells a lie. That's it, am done with you. (She was lying to her TWIN sister!) And my gut already told me NO to dealing with her in any fashion!
Sign #9 You feel used.
Sign#10 It’s a one side relationship
Sign#11 You are watching this video
These points are really strong.
Facts
You are right ♥️
Sign #11
Yup
Being used by a person you love is psychological abuse, and it hurts so much. But remember that you're not alone and it will pass.
Well said.
Especially if it's a family member.
both my parents use me, so I know this feeling. my mom is still around, but my dad was killed by the cops 2 years ago.
I totally agree, there’s nothing that hurts more, I also want to say that I just recently started listening to this channel and it’s been so helpful to know that there are others going through the same things I am, and all the great advice is a definite plus, Thank You
It's my family and im the scapegoat. I didn't think it will pass, i was born to be this pathetic and evil creature. Everything i do and not do will always be me, i don't think i can live longer in my life..
One thing I have observed over the years is If you are a "people pleaser," the USERS will recognize this characteristic in you and try to take advantage of it. These "USERS" can be your friends, relatives, schoolmates, coworkers, etc... Pleasing other people can be very exhausting. I get so sick of it when certain people only call you because they need something from you. Otherwise they would never bother you at all. Over the years I have learned to say "NO." Of course there needs to be a balance. I think the key is distinguishing the difference between USERS and people that you can trust.
Exactly. Wish this was taught in schools. For the most part as kids, we’re taught to be nice, help others, and turn the other cheek, etc but it actually sets you up for failure when you come of age and people start to take advantage of your kindness.
All I wanna do these days is be an asshole just to protect myself. It kinda blows.
Im a people pleaser too , so i have the same problem
I am or used to be a people pleaser, always seeking for recognition. That is so sad... I’m so glad I managed to change that behaviour in me. Also I have to add in this comment that you are TOTALLY RIGHT in your statement!!!!
So true they spot their prey and believe yu me they are going to pounce
There is nothing worse than someone who you thought loved you but use you instead.
Actually, there is something much worse. Staying with that person anyway and continuing to be abused. Sadly, it happens all the time. I’ve seen entire lives ruined for decades. Right in my own family.
right
And let the ones thats in there ear with all the advice use them. Its a never ending cycle
Happening rn ..I'm tired
It can also destroy family ,especially if you have children
The worst feeling the world is knowing you've been used and lied to.
Don't give them your power. Make it a learning opportunity.
Lol ikr but I feel like am the user 🐒even though I have been used.😄😭😭😭😭😒😒😒😒😒😒😒
This kinda of people leave it to Karma settle the score
@@saywhatyouwant888 maybe it's already settling. Who knows!!
So true
When you're watching this only so that you don't ever use someone intentionally or unintentionally...
Because you know how much of an impact it can have on someone
True!!
Golden words ..the users must know who there and not cause pain to others advantage of
You're a sweetheart for caring this much
True points in your video. Some people will pretend to care about you, but get angry at the least little thing you say or do, to control you and the relationship with their anger and manipulation games.
So very true
1- they're only there when they need help
2- they don't follow through on promises
3- they make you watch what you say
4- they always assume you are paying
5- they're only nice when they need to be
6- your loved ones are worried
7- they never say thank you
8- you begin to dislike them
The type of people who won't take no for an answer and still try to persuade you. Annoys me so much
Yes!
Summary
0:56 they are only there if they need something
1:32 they don't follow through promises
1:57 they make you watch what you say
2:34 they always assume that you are paying
2:56 they are only nice when they needed you
3:26 your loved ones are worried
3:59 they never say thank you
4:31 you begin to dislike them
Thanks!!! You're quick!
Thanks.
But I think in the 8th point you wrote *being* whereas its Begin. Thanks Once Again.
@@Quack2128 sorry 😅
That’s what happened to me
i recognized a couple of them in a couple of people i mostly knew from my old school :/
Empaths and HSPs need this guide, we give people way too many chances :/
Yeah.
I’m an empath, but when I know someone’s toxic, they have one chance. Trust is hard to earn from me.
Sharma ji I think everyone needs this video, even the one who does this so that they can see the damage that they do to sOmEoNE and realize how bad they are!
*(Y) Same*
Hsp's?
In my opinion, when it comes to dealing with manipulative or generally toxic people, the absolute best thing you could possibly do is be absolutely shameless with what you say or do. Don't fear what they might think of whatever you say. When I was being manipulated, I decided to completely disregard their opinion and broke the friendship.
Don't take whatever I say seriously tho. This is just what worked for me
Why not take it seriously? This is great advice. Do not take their shit. Someone trying to manipulate you? Give them your darkest self. You are right for standing up for yourself. Do not fear anything they will do or say, stand your ground. You do not even need to explain this to others, protecting yourself is important, do not be fooled into thinking you are bad for stoping an evil person. You are good, you deserve better, do not accept anything less.
If there's a "plus side" to the pandemic it is how the social distancing has the side effect of weeding users out of one's life.
A neighbor commented on the happy improvement in her finances, and then she said, "I didn't mean that the way it sounds." It seemed clear and understandable to me. If you're a low-maintenance person, it can be tricky to recognize one-way friendships.
Oh, I totally agree!
@@CHPete I know what you mean.
Ive noticed that too man non of this bull crap of narcissitic type people I noticed walk past me, next thing we see people explore abandoned places and we see the ghost of the narcissistic person 😆.
Ok jokes aside lol, they are among us in most places and situations, Ive met nice people its the narcs that worry me
True, but unfortunately some people's users are in the same household. I'm happy for the ones who could get away from those during the pandemic though.
Every friendship I have. There’s such thing as being too nice, don’t be me, don’t fall into the trap.
2 years later (2023) update: People still suck, pick your friends wisely 😅
I am a sucker for being too nice too. And it hurt like hell. We have to ask god for more wisdom.
@@gayemiller6754 same I delt with it with a ex he's a user
I'm too nice too. We should all just be friends yo
Me too
@@gayemiller6754 proverbs 4 14-17 tells you what to do
I’ve been abused financially by a friend and man I gotta tell ya it hurts a lot when you feel like you can’t say no to them I always thought I was “too nice” to even do that but now I know better because of this video thank you so much 🌟 😁
I really like everything about psych2go, the animation is so cute, the voice is so relaxing and joyful and the way they discuss things makes me feel that we're not alone
Definitely! If one person is going through a tough time. You’d be surprise someone else are also experiencing the same thing! What other topics would you like us to cover on? :)
@@Psych2go I don't know though but every time you post something I can always relate, I'm recently struggling with my boyfriend and I'm a little down. Maybe you could do more cover songs or your own songs :) sometimes music can ease up the pain that we're feeling and recently I've been listening to hey Delilah and I really really love that I hope you have a Spotify though cause that would be really really helpful and nice:)
amanda ellorda Aww sorry to hear you’re going through a rough patch. Just remember it’s a temporarily situation and it will pass. Yes, I totally agree with you that music can positively impact us. We also had another cover on Sia. Feel free to check it out :)
@@Psych2go That's so sweet that you guys can respond to comments :) it makes me really happy and loved. Thank you so much continue what you're doing this can save lives and can help them mentally. I'm really proud :)
Yes. There is something really comforting about being here, a kind of peace not found on more "hostile" channels.
It took me a while to realize I was being used by two people who I considered friends, they were one-way friendships, at first I was sad, when I realized I was being used, but now I can say that I am thankful, that God removed them, from the path that he is taking me on. It was so hard, because I would try to justify their actions towards me or try to see things a different way, but I have been learning in no way should a friend be used, and a friendship shouldn't be one-sided, and a friendship shouldn't be based on conditions, because I have been learning what I truly deserve, and I don't deserve mistreatment in anyway, sometimes, when people walk out of someone's life, it's not always a bad thing, but it can actually be a blessing in disguise. It is only after people are no longer a part of your life you may have thought were "friends", when you see that they were not really adding to your life, if you find out you have more peace without them being present. The "friends" who I thought were my "friends" taught me some lessons, and I just know I don't ever want to put myself in a situation to be used and mistreated by anyone, no matter how nice they may appear to be.
You're absolutely correct 💯. It's better off being your own friend. You don't need them.
#2: failure to follow through on promises, is what severely damaged a long term friendship.
This former best friend would repeatedly ask if I wanted to go to an event with him (usually a sporting event or a meal) but in at least 6 instances completely failed to follow through and left me hanging.
After the last one I had enough and began the process of distancing myself from the relationship. His word meant nothing to me anymore.
THIS ART STYLE IS SO ADORABLE! And the video is fantastic as always!
Thanks for watching! Don’t forget to share this video to your friends. What do you think about the topic?
I was JUST about to say the same thing. So cute!
One big RED FLAG is when the person in particular sees people as TRANSACTIONS/FINANCIALLY/CONSTANT FAVORS ETC. They don't see you as a human with feelings, only ways to be exploited and used. And not be able to say NO without them going OFF THE RAILS CRAZY. This list can go on forever.
I had a "friend" that would want to go out to eat but then never have enough to cover her portion of the bill or not have enough money to tip. Also, she liked to order really expensive wine and seafood and then would want to go in half when I had a beer and sandwich. The last time we went out when the waitress came to the table I asked for separate checks. This so called friend got upset but still was stuck with paying for her food and tip. I continued asking for separate checks and when she asked why I said it was easier (meaning I only had to pay for what I had) than doing the math at the end of the meal. She ended up getting a huge (at least a million) inheritance and then married a wealthy man. I moved away and we are no longer friends.
She take davantage...🙄
When i was in the service my "best friend" from highschool and two friends from church always would hang out. We were very close. After i got back from afghanistan and out of the corps I quickly realized what i had been blind to. It was always me paying for everything. It was always me buying alcohol or paying for dinner or gas. As i started to push back they were very rude and tried to make me out to be the rude one. As if i was the ungrateful one. One even told me that i was being selfish for not being willing to spend my money to travel 4 hours for a day trip to st augustine fl, which i wasnt even employed at the moment. Every single one of them didnt care what i had been through. None of them were interested in supporting me without something in return. They made my depression worsen and i began to lash out over frustration. Its just really dissapointing to lose everything you thought you came home to as far as friends go. Thats a dark place to be. Moral of this litfle piece of history... be aware of those you are close to, and be careful who you lend your heart to. Most people arent in it for you. When you find someone who truely cares about you, it will make the effort that much more worth it and meaningful.
One person give me friendship but l have always to invite or pay for this person....no way is not À real and good friendships....sadly we have to left go this person .....no choise.......good friend not take davantage......
Yup the Drill Instructor always told us when we went back “home” how people would use you and think you were rich. My kill hat put me through hell in the basic but at least she was honest and I had more respect from her then people back “home” too.
Sorry to hear that. The people who are there for you when you have nothing to offer them are the real ones. Unfortunately they are few and far between.
Hello to all the beautiful people randomly scrolling through the comment section
Hi
Hi
Hello
Hello!!
Thats all of us, thanks!
The best thing is to leave that relationship if you can. Most easy is a friendship to leave compared to other types. Leave them . Become a stranger and have them become a stranger
I knew a guy last year that used me for all the nice things I did for him. Bought nice food every week many times and even took him to PR just to have him abuse me two days later when we got back to the city. I couldn’t believe him, how dare him. I was super hurt. But it’s 2023 now and I’m glad he is not in my life anymore 🙏🏽💗
It never feels right to be used by anybody, even until they use you up!
I had a girlfriend who used and manipulated me so much. She told me when we go out she never expects to pay for anything. She would constantly disrespect me and when I expressed disappointment she would pin it on me like I am the wrong one. She would apologize and I would go back only to go through the vicious cycle again and again. Careful with these type of manipulating users. Great insight from the video !
#3 Means you feel like you need to walk on eggs around them. Being on your best behavior constantly. Always waiting for the next shoe to drop.
YOU deserve to have friends who love you for who you are. People you can relax and be your Self with. Your true self. Let go of people who judge and criticize you. You are worthy to be loved just for being you. I am sending love and hugs from Washington State, Jeanne of In Loving Hands Counseling and ASMR
Yes. Good way to say it.
In a nut shell. Exactly. 👍👍👍👍So true.
100% true, awesome advise. Hindsight is 2020 once you realize. Wish I had more relationships under my belt to sense this but I was blind to it. Thanks a lot, I’m finally moving out this week and moving on to my next chapter!
My toxic friends just ditched me, honestly glad, I don’t want to hang out with them anymore. They’re still coming after my other friends though, I seriously don’t get it. I wonder how long it is until they come for me tbh
Gacha • Grace until you commit suicide. It’s horrible, but it’s the truth. They will only stop when you’ve ended it all, that’s their goal, and you need to avoid everyone involved with them.
Meemah_ SN yep. I honestly don’t get their problem, they started stuff and acting like we’re being moody 😔 we’re just gonna ignore them
It’s bad enough I cut the other day because of them..
Gacha • Grace ...jeez... you really need to cut them out. If you can afford it, see counselling, because this is just not ok. Thankfully I was able to escape all the toxic relationships I’ve been in, but I’m no where near close to escaping all the ppl who try to use me, but I can see them coming. Hopefully you get the hope you need, and the respect you deserve by all the ppl in your life, not just your group of friends. And I hope those bitches who tormented you rot
Meemah_ SN I’m desperately trying to cut them out, they keep annoying my friends tho and being mean to them, they really suck.
I hope your life is great too 🥺👌
Gacha • Grace we’ll be here if you need us
I usually suspect I am being used by someone when I find myself ghosting him or her. In other words, my ghosting that person is my mind's way of telling me that I subconsciously feel used.
Yes your right subconsciously happen to me I would ghost drift away from person they but always come back I sure what to do get rid leach
Currently me rn
I agree. Wanting to avoid someone is a warning sign
lol ghosting is more like you used them enough
@@paulbienvenu5494 Maybe I did not explain the scenario well enough and why I feel used yet I am the one ghosting. How would you feel if I were to behave as follows:
I call you up and say, "hey Paul, I have not seen you for a long time. We should meet for coffee. Are you free today after work? Say about 6 pm at Starbucks?
You say, "okay, why not?"
You get to Starbucks at 6 pm and after buying you a $5 coffee, we sit down and I talk about myself for 2 hours then I tell you, "hey Paul, I hate to do this to you but I need to borrow your car. Mine is at the dealer getting fixed." You then tell me that you need the car for work and I say, "come on man- I thought I could count on you." You give in and I return the car to you two weeks later with an empty tank.
Then I do not call you for three months. After three months, I call you again and invite you to dinner- just to "catch up". When you arrive at the restaurant, I am there with another person who I tell in front of you, "this is my friend Paul. Hey Paul, Dave here has a great plan for a line of automatic tuna can openers. This is a great opportunity. Paul, you can provide the capital and Dave will oversee operations. We will give you a 5% cut." You say, "no thanks " and I tell you that I thought you were my friend and I was just trying to help you out by showing you a great business opportunity.
No calls from me for months and then I call you again months later and tell you I have tickets to the musical Hamilton and would you like to go. This time, you decline and pretend to have the Bubonic Plague. When I call you three months later, you tell me you cannot meet me because you have leprosy.
Now imagine that the situation were reversed and I were you in the above scenario. That is why I am ghosting this person. Now, whom is using whom?
I had a falling out with what proved to be an opportunistic friend last year. She was adept at taking advantage of people's kindness by making them feel sorry for her. When I pointed it out to her, she became angry and wanted to end the friendship; I was glad as she'd taken advantage of me for long enough and I started to dislike her as a result. Watch out for people who take your kindness as weakness, people!
Barbara gray commenting I will certainly say Amen to your comment I lost my husband naturally I'm alone now and it gets lonely I had a friend who wanted her daughter to be companion to me just visit for a couple hours and talk to me and wanted me to pay her for it I thought that was really taking advantage of a bad situation for me and because I've shown kindness in the past I guess they take me to for an easy mark but that is changing I'm beginning to understand their people do use other people, to take advantage of someone because they might be lonely and charge them them, just to sit and talk with you seems a bit of a stretch to me I'm sure I could never do that to anyone it's a very sad thing when we have to come to this in life people want to charge you for kindness.
@@johngray1253 agree with your point, it's must be pain to do that to other people, because I know how it feels
Yup. Every sign stated has been prevalent in the users I have known.
Good to hear them all in one video.
Thank you
I feel kind of embarrassed. So many friends in the past used me because I wanted them to like me, especially back when I was a kid. I guess that's when it started.😟
Me too. My parents also always told to be kind and helpful no matter what.
I also fell into that same trap and it hurts.
Hi there. I'm sorry, that people took advantage of you. You have nothing to feel embarrassed about. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people in this world, including myself who feel very isolated, and would just like to have a really good friend.. my name is Chrissy. I'm in a wheelchair. I have cerebral palsy. Unfortunately, my circle of friends is very small., I haven't met the right type of people, who would like to stick around and be a permanent friend. I am 45 years old. So far, I have three people, in my life right now, who are considered my friends. 2 of the people, live in BC where I am. My other friend lives in Manitoba. I met her when I was very small. I find it, very strange and unbelievable that this world is so big and yet I can only find three friends who are permanent. In the past, I've had people use me for money, or alcohol. I don't know why, people hurt other people? I was even dumped by friends, because I refused to drink alcohol with them. I also can't do everything that a walking person can do. I was dumped for that reason as well.. that really hurts. I would just like to encourage you and everyone, who feels isolated, to get out in their community. There are a lot of groups and activities you can join. Hopefully, you will meet the right friend for you. I believe, that you are special. And you deserve to be happy. 😊 Don't give up stay strong.
That's what I've decided to do as well., 😊👍
Protect and lookout for yourself first and foremost.
@@thisisme3238 same
For this kinds of friend, I hardly make friendship with anyone. I have only 2 best friends and bunch of frienemies
Wtf is a "frienemies"
@@user-pg1hf2xj9g That kind of friend who sometimes act as you friend and sometimes they act as your enemies. They are not to be trusted. If you share very personal feelings while they are your friends, they will use that facts against you when they are your enemies.
Frienenies are beyond awful. They can do you considerable damage at work. One lady pretended she was my friend to other people. i hardly knew her and didn't particulary like her. One day she gave me a small, inexpensive gift for something kind I had done for her at work. I took it (to be polite, said thanks) and she spent the next month confronting me about it. She'd make a scene in front of colleagues on why I hadn't used her gift. I gave it back. Frienemies are usually women who use another female to game others. They destroy your reputation and undermine your finest characteristics. They get just close enough to poison your well.
Sometimes BFFs only have to number one. We all have people that we know that are acquaintances. We try to keep them positive and all is semi-good. But if you have that one person in your life no matter where they live, that you can either text thsm at 3 AM or call them at 3 AM and they pick up the phone you're doing fantastically. And they don't admonish you for calling. The first words out of their mouth is are you OK. And you can say no. And they will be there for you. Because they know that you will reciprocate. Because you love and respect each other. That is the boundary. Friendships are not something we rack up like a score at a game..And true friends drop everything because they know you will do it for them. So I think you're doing just fine. Have a good weekend. Stay safe on the Fourth of July.
Well I would call them simply manipulators. The just pretend to be your friend when it works in their favor and do anything to make you look bad in front of others. That's the trick. They say they are 'cool' with you, when they are not. They want to destroy your reputation and your connections to others. I have experienced it myself several times. How to get out of this situation when leaving ia no option? The awnser is confrontation. Do not be nice to people trying to ruin your live. Stand up for yourself however this may look like. Make it clear in front of others, that this manipulator is not your friend and do not talk to him, ignore him whenever possible. Do not fear anything coming from this person. Most of the times those people are cowards when everyone turns against them. Speak about to people you trust, gain back confidence.
The videos make the reality less harsh but still getting the message across, thank you!
I can relate to this video. I'm a very giving, kind and caring person but people seem to take advantage of that and use me 😢. I will be careful who I am nice too, wonderful video as always! Love from Canada ❤️
This all happened to me.
I got my revenge.
Nice people always win.
You just need to keep calm and not do nothing rational as painfully as that sounds.
Just stand your ground.
End the relationship/ friendship.
You win.
You got your revenge.
Good job.
:)
Denial is upon us. Thank you for telling the truth plainly
When you don't have any close relationships for years and suddenly a person comes into your life and pours gratitude and love for you just with their honey words, you probably lose your mind for them. You can't feel the toxicity of them to just use you for the sake of themselves. They see you just as a resource for them. They don't want to see any good thing about you. This thing can't be realized by you because you crave more love and care from them. Slowly you lose your individuality and become a slave to them. Your dreams will be around them. You made your life depend on their life. Your every act will be intended towards that person. Even if they spoil every aspect of your personal, physical, social, and mental well-being you will revolve around your dream with them. The fear of losing the person who tricks you to consider him/ her to be important in your life shadows their toxicity. You start to support all their shitty acts even if you do know that they are shits.
But at one point when things started to make sense, you miserably broke into pieces. You can now understand how badly you are fucked up by him/her. After that point, it is going to be as hard as hell to get yourself back just for you. Your confidence has already been destroyed. So in the initial phase of realizing the truth, your hatred will turn towards yourself. There will always be an option to return back to them and continue to live in day-dream, with their honey words. They will always welcome you genuinely because they don’t want to lose a resource. But as said by wise men, it is your choice that makes every difference in your entire life.
You need to struggle to get yourself back. But this struggle is worth it. You are the only solution for the emptiness in you.
Be you and engage in stuff that really matters!!!
Good luck to every broken heart on the planet!!!
Your "Signs You Have Depression" video helped me learn I have depression. People think it is fake, so even though you're videos are for education, I watch them to cheer up. :>
i've never been this fast in my life.
Thanks for watching! What do you think about these signs?
@@Psych2go this is SO true and i'm disappointed that i always overlook these signs and eventually getting used anyways🙃 even though i know that these are obvious!
A friend I’ve known for 40 years will come see me (we live 300+ miles away) every year around her birthday (this past week). This time I made her a cake and fixed dinner a couple of times and she does not lift a finger to help with dishes. When we went out to eat, she orders and walks away (at deli and coffee shop). Then to top it all off, she sits and is either on her phone talking, texting or on social media most of the time. I’m hurt and fed up. She likes to remind me that none of my other friends come see me, only her. It is really hard to be direct with her because of her outbursts (she is bi-polar) but I’m allowing her to get away with treating me this way. 😢
Thank you for telling me all of these signs
I Finally realize I need to cut off people in my life T n T
I’ve been used for too long, none of them thought of saying thank you for my support and initiative.
One of the worst feeling is when you realise that someone you love only uses you! I managed to erase a friendship exactly like that. After 5 years of a close friendship with a girl I revised situations and feelings I had in so many occasions that I only wanted to disappear from Earth... Therapy helped me see things through.
The little dance at the end was THE ABSOULUTE CUTEST THING EVER!!!
Glad you noticed it! :D We all can do a little dance at the end to celebrate that you've watched till the end. Are there any other topics you'd like us to cover on? Let us know :)
i had a friend that i haven't talked to in a really long time. we were working on a project for creative writing together and honestly only came to me when she needed help. she asked me to write the ending for her while she just sat there and watched me fail because i was scared to add my own artistic ideas. she literally shot down almost every single one of them and i hated her for it. she criticized my idea by laughing at it and saying it was too creative. like wha- it's a creative writing class.. when i told her that the teacher had split us up due to me asking, she just said ok and proceeded to brag about her good grades. i ended up leaving her because i realized that her actions were toxic after talking to a few of my writing friends. in the end though, i am glad that i got a better grade on the assignment than her. just proves how toxicity and selfishness and being used can deteriorate your mental and physical health because when i was chatting with her, i was constantly on edge of the harmful things she would say to me. it also lowered my self esteem in my writing and made me question how well my writing actually was.
it made me Cry
That gaved me stress Next day Covered in darkness
zero tolerance for manipulation, being real is all I know. just saying...♡
When you find out that a loved one use actually using is emotionally painfull but it's recalled as a life lesson
Ive been through this something very similar and I hope that no one else goes through this because IT SUCKS!
Make sure you have friends that make you feel special and beautiful bc that’s what you are
Hits the nail straight on! My adult son not only a vampire, but has been extremely controlling
i remember this girl at work would make an effort to talk to me only on the days when she was going to ask me for a lift home...other than that, would barely acknowledge my presence....
1) They wanted me to come in all the time, even when I had plans.
2) How many times have I told friends and family they make promises they never intended to keep? This made me stop trusting them.
3) They lied to me about the boss saying he was thinking of firing me so I can work for them again. I found out the boss never said such a thing.
4) In an ironic way, so when I did, they called me an idiot.
5) Their favourite line: "You know you love me?"
6) Mother was always worried about me, and really despised that person for what they did.
7) They did say thank you, but never meant it.
8) I dislike them. I've never bothered to call them, and they haven't spoken to me since I've left.
Being nice only when you want something is a clear sign other's are taking your kindness for weakness unfortunately in some cases it's very true so be very careful about it 🤔
I learned this the hard way over the years...took many financial losses, been heartbroken, and fell into depression. Once I wised up, got cold and started cutting people off I felt better. Cut a snake off at the head and it'll stop moving PERIOD!!!
Everyone: trying to find out if they were used by other people
Me: trying to find out if I'm the one using someone else
And luckily I didn't :)
Me too! I came here to check if I was using anyone. Phew I don't.
I think I am sometimes with my bff but to be fair I am kinda loud
Aw! You sound like a nice person to watch yourself like that.
Me too🤣
Un Original Same lmao
Basically you give give give and get 0 in return.
But some do say thank you because they have to keep their supply chain operating.
👇👇
They Make You Feel Uncomfortable.
They Make You Afraid To Say No.
They're Only Nice When It's Convenient.
They Only Call At Night.
They Are All About The Favors.
They Create A Sense Of Resentment.
They Don't Focus On Your Needs.
I have a friend that he always dont focus on my needs, And it's very annoying. But i need him to spend time with. What do i do? Someone? っ╥╯﹏╰╥c
@@hiyahiya3491 maybe talk with him that he dont focus your need's? If you helped and focus his need's, and he's not doing it to you back? Maybe he can change
THIS IS THE PERSON I'M TALKING ABOUT!!!! BUT CAN'T MENTION!
the reason why i have a Trust issues to someone else until now except my Family
DON'T COMPLAIN I'M JUST LEAVING THE TEXT ME BACK WHEN I FEEL LIKE IT CLUB!
When I was younger, I always tried my best to Please everyone. I was always the one that Invited People and took care of everything. Yes, it was and is Exhausting. I realized how few People return the favor. As I got older, I started to distance myself more and more from Everyone. Now, I usually go out by myself, eat, drink by myself. I find it that I am more at Peace with Myself living like this than how I use to be before.
Man, this is what is happening in our country. Its like the Crab Mentality.
People chasing the clout and is super sensitive. They bring down other people for their own progress.
Im sorry if i cant rlly explain, and my english is bad. I live in a 3rd world country
Your English is really good
Filipino? Hahahahahha vro
Sounds like in Philippines LOL
@@jimineutron3775 im sorry its not the philippines :)
Philippines
Worst thing a human being can do to another person
wow can we appreciate how quickly psych2go posts ?!
We got your back! :) What other topics would you like us to cover on? Don’t forget the more people shares our content the better! It helps support our content. It will gives us the ability to create more content.
literally me when all my friends and family told me 4 months ago that he was super toxic and I thought they couldn’t see what I saw in him and then we got in a huge fight last week and me now trying to get ready to go out with my makeup done watching this video trying not to cry🥺🙄😂🤧
My friend uses me. he uses me when we were done high school/secondary school he just deleted me off all of social media and when he found out I was going to the same college he added me back and then he said “sorry, it was all mental health issues” and now he uses me for favours like going to the shops when he feel likes it but when I do it, every-time he says “I think I’m doing something” and that was also yesterday and now today he is with his Freinds down town and how I know is that his friend took a picture of the town on that day and he was there as-well. So even though I’m gonna be lonely now it’s better then being used by someone.
Be lonely, and find yourself 🤔🙂
I have a friend that constantly asks for favors but when I ask for a favor they immediately forget it the next day,
I honestly don’t know if it’s toxic or not because they only call me when they want something from me.
Its very depressing though. I have classmates who always ask for my help even if I say that I'm busy. But they'll keep insisting cause they always knew me as someone who's open to help everytime, so once I help them I don't get to finish mine on time. Yet one night, my classmate texted me and said that's its unfair that I finish my schoolworks so fast but they don't know how many sleepless nights and breakdowns I had. I wasn't dissapointed by the fact of her asking for help cause I always help her even let her copy sometimes but at least she could have said thank you instead of saying that I'm unfair... And until now, I still can't bring myself to say how I feel😔
You are not responsible for helping your classmates. You're not the teacher there. It's not your job to help them, you have your own life to worry about.
I do not care about anyone except myself.
Until people care about me properly without always excluding me then I have no real feelings towards most people!
This happens to me all the time, but if I do not continue to help them they judge me for not being there for them. I wish they would return the favor but I must do what I can to make their lives easier.
There are no musts!!!!! It does not feel good when people use us. There's the difference! If I put myself in harms way I will get hurt.
Friends? It’s more like my sister and her husband. We are coming to stay with you, pick us up at the airport, can you make us dinner, can I borrow your car? The list goes on and on, while I’m the one taking care of our parents in their home. She said “Mom you should leave your house to Liz, she’s been taking care of you for 5 years!” I really thought it was about the work I had been doing. I opened my eyes after my Mother died they would come for their visits 4 or 5 times a year from Milwaukee to N.Y. Long Island, to golf the Black at Bethpage. I treated them like royalty but now I’m not longer taking care of my Mom, it’s all about them! I said “Get a car from the airport, I’m not picking you up.” They had a fit! Then they stopped at the grocery store on the way here, did they call to ask if I needed anything of course not. They put their groceries away, and then ask, would you make us diner? Holy shit! Then we go out to eat, my favorite place. My sister “Excuse me waiter can we have separate checks? Did they pick up my dinner? Of course not! My brother in law once told me “ this is like a game to see how much I can get away with!” They wanted me to get the house so they could have a place to stay for free with all the ass kissing that went along with it. Friends??? Not in my case it’s family! That’s just one sister I have another but she and her husband is an entirely different story but still the same crap, they live near by. The whole time I struggled with my Mother they were no where to be found, but when they were around it was,” why don’t you do this, this, and this?” Never lifted a finger and was MIA. I’m done with my family now! They can kiss my ass!
Good for you! You’re not a doormat!
Hello Elizabeth what horrible relations you have , keep them out of your life they are no use they are just users all the way , enjoy your life the best way you can ,im sure you loved your mother and im sure you think of her often , all the very best
👏👏👏....mine aren't my favorite people, right about now either. It's funny how a major death in the family will reveal people you've known your entire life's true character....
@@sugalovely1238 Yes Suga all you have to do is scratch the surface and see what happens and what comes out of the woodwork , so enjoy ur self and have nice times and dont mind those farts they are no use
Good for YOU!👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻❤️
I spotted signs #1, #2, #3, #5 and #8 in my childhood and adolescence. I learned the hard way that sometimes being nice comes at the expense of your own happiness and well-being. When it gets to the point where everyone starts using your good nature to get what they want from you, it becomes a problem.
All relationship under the superficial surface of "love", all rest on a barter of utility. People are only in your life by the degree of their perceived value of you. Anyone want to challenge this? Simply stop being the utility and see if "love" keeps someone around. Esp men, you are not appreciated for your inherent value as a human being. You are only appreciated for your value attained through personal growth etc. You are loved for WHAT you are, not who you are.
I'm a private duty Nurse and some clients say," I'm paying you so do what i say".... they are rude and I'm starting to cancel care services to these types of clients and carefully choose kinder people to care for whom are respectful and non-controlling 🌿
I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate
He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay
Whtsaap him"**
A friend "ghosted" and used me - still hurting and confused by it. I gave her too much - she gave me too little. When she didn't need me anymore as her 911 friend, she dumped me. I was played - and this realization is hard to process.
My friend was like this she was pretending that she wanted to be friends with me when she really didnt. And she would never say "Thankyou" Too me
Real friends can be one or sometimes two if you are lucky.Those friends are good in good and bad time.If someone calls only when he[she]needs you for something-that does not call your friend.They are just taking advantage of you.I used to have those fake friends for many years in my life and i realize that they are just wasting my time, money, energy and hope.
My bff:
Only calls me when she's bored and makes me talk to her for hours
Uses my words against me yet says, "It's ok, be blunt"
Lied to me and brings up an arsenal of my past wrongdoings instead of admitting
Only treats me with respect when she wants me to go out with her or accompany her to hang out with her friends as I am the only friend her mother approves of, if I dont go she cant go.
Says I dont care about her if I say no
Never apologises
My whole family is worried
Im starting to wonder why I was so patient with her, and I losing all respect for her.
Welp. Time to do something about it. Thanks for this video!
Do you know what’s bff
@@goblin1073 Yep. Although if you are trying to make a sarastic or funny remark, go somewhere else. I know what's going on
Honk Honk I’m not being sarcastic or funny I’m just asking
Sounds like a sociopath - stay away
@@naom4naom598 not really because she treats everyone really nice except me because she says that best friends are custom made for each other and that they should be able to handle each othere's darkness
I have female colleague at work who literally wants to be around me when her other friend is not at work. In her friend’s absence she really wanna sit with me, take selfies which I deny, ask me if I wanna tk a break and once her friend is present at work , she isolates me.
I did not notice this before but I learned it with time that she is a user. It was evident and frankly my supportive peers notice it and address it with me . Please know the only person who will not use you is God.
Everyone else is going to use you to feel better about themselves. Accept it and lose it!
i used to deal with this stuff before, friends only being nice in my birthdays because of the places we go. but im glad it is over. well done psych2go
You deserve better friends!
I finally put my foot down with a community service organization that I have been involved with for over 42 years. I have been heading up a fundraising effort since 1999. I have been used and taken advantage of this entire time. I have poured thousands of dollars of my own money into the project, without being reimbursed for my money for expenses. It stops now. I have given notice that I am not doing it anymore. People are always telling me how they think I should run things, but they never want to volunteer to help. People have been rude to me and I am done. Let them figure it out on their own. I have purchased items for this project and they are not getting them. I’m donating everything to the Marines and toys for tots. I deserve respect.
THANK U VERY MUCH I NEEDED THAT!!!!!!
I Always thought is was just me but now I finally got it it's not all me well at least that's what my husband says it's all my fault, and he's does just about all of these things u have said. IM IN A UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP I MUST GET OUT NOW.... UR AWESOME keep putting these things out there for people like me who's. Needs and Needs to know how people really r thank u have a blessed day
I have been alway been victim of this (except the paying for money). People plead you for help like there is no tomorrow they are seeing without you. After we help them, all they say is thank you and get on with their life and we stand nowhere. Tried asking for help to people and seen them turning back when I most required their help. I had to let go each and everyone because there was always an expectation from them to help them out whenever needed. I can't carry that burden with me all the time.
This video helped me a lot more than I thought it would, thank you so much!
My toxic uncle constantly compare me to others and saying that doing this is for my own good. He would ask me to buy/complete a task, and in return he gives me some money/small gifts, but never say thank you. i am the one who say thank you when receiving money/gift as i think it would be rude if i didn't. But turns out that he never wanted to help me/my family at all. All he wants to do it's showing off how successful he is and i can never achieve anything like that. i felt frustrated when figuring out that he is such a toxic person after nearly 20 years. And somehow lost the hope in humanity as he is my mother's brother, but he never wanted to see me succeed. And look down on me all the times. i feel like i am the dumbest person on earth.
Your artstyle is really cute!
You're so right. I have some friends in my life that they can be giving a nice at times but most of the time they don't listen to your pain, they laugh at you, look irritated when you look happy, make fun of you your body, they don't listen when you talk, they're not there when you need them, and they blow you off for quite some time until they feel like talking to you. if you don't do what they want they blow you off or if they're in a bad mood or if they're just feeling insecure or if you don't take the time as soon as you they want you to they blow you off or they're mean to you. That's when I decided to let go
Wow this was totally my last relationship and the picture with her gaming and me doing the dishes, totally fcked my head bc it literally happened to me.
When I spoke up about this and wanted to clear things up, she broke up with me, damaging me a bit more mentally. Luckily this video really helped me see more clearly through the fog
Wow,straight up your face what arse…
I’ve had a friend that I have known for about 6 years now, and I realized throughout the years how much she manipulates, and how toxic she is. I feel like I’ve always done everything for her, she’s never once did something for me. At all. And I’ve given her so much. And she’s always just uses me for they things I have. And when I don’t give it to her she gets mad. And starts to act petty. I’m starting to not hangout with her anymore, but it’s like sometimes she likes me and other days she doesn’t. I have to be a good friend all the time. And I realized that she just takes advantage of the things I give her. and she always makes me feel like I’m the bad person.. always. And I’ve always felt that I would always be the one doing something’s wrong... that’s what manipulation is guys.. you won’t even realize it ..
This type of animation is really cute💕
Thanks so much! A few seconds before this I quit a toxic relationship. Here is a little about myself, I am a young artist and gfx creator, i got these "friends", they claim they will give me currency if i made them something, well i keep making something and they always say actually, I will give you currency after you finish this thumbnail, they were kind at first, but only when i made them a drawing or gfx design, this is the point where i felt manipulated, everything said in this video was what they acted like, thanks so much for helping me remove a ton & pound of pressure on me psych2go, first time a youtube video relived me, underrated content ;)
So true.... my ex friend was using me all the time and asked for money non stop and almost never returned it. When i finally had enough and asked her for my money back she got pissed and now ghosts me. Never said thank you, always expected me to pay for the food, drinks etc... good riddens!
My Heart goes out to you! Don't let this person damage your faith in human nature, there are some really good people out there, hope you find one to befriend!
Regards
David
God Bless.it is SAD to realize “friends can be users/losers/needy black holes && CHEATERS
"Do me a favor?"
Just say NO.
Don't ask "what?" Or "Depends on what you ask." NO.
No nice person ever begins with "Do me a favor, though." No one nice.
When you have something to ask someone to do, how do you do it? Expect that too from a decent human being.
Aw my childhood😍🤚80% of my friendships was false, memories😍😍😘😍
I think I’m in this stage…
Listening to this has helped me alot, due to the situation im facing now, i think im too weak, and this jus gave strength.....im afraid of regret and guilt and are just not sure what choice to make at this point..........and sometimes i see the right choice staring directly at me, and i let myself down for a millionth time.....u know when u have the feeling that ur doing the right thing and at the same time u feel ur making a wrong move...that's exactly my point here.....i just wish me good luck with the last decision i finally make.
This made me cry so bad. Thank you so much for this
Glad this video helped you! Why did you cry? 😕
@@Psych2go i just found that since a year i was in a toxic relationship.. This person use to put me down emotionally and also made fun of my job and income and use to talk about his ex and her family and he is like you can't give me 10 lakh also he was like i had 6 girlfriends you are just one of those.. He played with my emotions so much.. And i was there when he wasn't well.. Emotionally and physically.. Always tried ro make him happy.. Hw never ever did even asked me how i am.. Honestly i just want god to give me justice.. I want a right man.. I have so much love in heart but i always get man who is toxic.. I feel dead
Stay strong! You will always be loved and remember your self worth. I hope you are able to walk away in a toxic relationship and keep your head high. The right person will come in your life when the time comes. You got this! 💕
@@Psych2go yes!! ❤️
Just a small reminder that you are worthy, that leaving these people will preserve your mental health, that being alone is better than being with a toxic person. Spare yourself the stress of always having to comply to them, spare yourself their exploitation of your fear of rejection, realize that they are abusing the weak spots to exploit you even more, preserve yourself.