How Does The Attachment Theory Affect Your Childhood Life?
Вставка
- Опубліковано 7 лип 2024
- According to attachment theory, the things we have gone through as a child, and our childhood trauma can tremendously affect our love styles, attachment styles, and relationships. This video talks about the four attachment styles, as well as how you can spot them at work or school, in relationships, and in a crisis.
#attachmentstyles #childhood #psych2go
Related Videos:
What Your Love Style Says About Your Childhood
• What Your Love Style S...
9 Signs You're Dealing with Childhood Trauma
• 9 Signs You're Dealing...
How Your Childhood Affects Your Love Styles
• How Your Childhood Aff...
We're also partnered with BetterHelp, where you could get online counseling at an affordable rate. You must be 18+ :
betterhelp.com/Psych2Go
betterhelp.com/Psych2Go
Credits
Script Writer: Amy (Spicevicous)
Script Editor: Kelly Soong
VO: Amanda Silvera
Music & Sound Design - Urban Goose Studios
Animator: Nayeli Meneses
UA-cam Manager: Cindy Cheong
References:
Yerkovich, M., & Yerkovich, K. (2017). How We Love. Retrieved September 28, 201
We've recently launched a few merch t-shirt designs to bring a piece of psych2go physically to you! Which of these do you like best? We might be giving out a few as well to those who may not be able to afford them. The intention of these designs is to remind you that each day, your mental health matters.
Here are the links btw :)
"Learn To Rest" Short-Sleeve Unisex T-Shirt
bit.ly/2DFweOu
"Time Heals Everything" Short-Sleeve Unisex T-Shirt
bit.ly/3h5hsz7
"Everyone Grows At Different Rates" Short-Sleeve Unisex T-Shirt
bit.ly/2CIozPe
"You Matter" Short-Sleeve Unisex T-Shirt
bit.ly/3ey8U2a
As a procrastinator and workaholic, I can relate to the "Learn To Rest" the most. The design is also very cute and calming.
I've been abused physically and emotionally) to 12-13-14(ish) and and I've still not have learned one thing i over think way to much and I'm constantly worried if stuff i fear will happen for example my well (it can't be my imagination becouse it constantly talks to me) it is so annoying and mabe that happend becouse of the abuse also I'm 14
Psych2Go this is vague because many people have habits from each group
Love em all
I don't understand how to relate myself to any of the types due to the fact I findI can't trust my own self so I was hoping maybe you can make some sort of online test for me to confirm what my attachment style I am
“Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.”
― James Baldwin
Gr8 quote thank you
Love that man, he was an amazing human. Thank you for sharing that amazing quote.
Yes, parents should lead their children by example, not "do as I say, not as I do"
The fruit doesn't fall far from the tree.
@oldschoolman 144 That is such a medieval thing to say. People are definitely capable of healing. I cut contact with my entire family, because they are completely toxic. All three of my kids have said, “Mom, we are so happy you aren’t an awful person, like grandpa and grandma are to you.”
Parents really need to get some counselling on how to raise up children before planning babies. They have their presumed messed up theories, philosophies and the stupid societal norms, which most likely they themselves are all confused about.
I sooooo agree with u!
Yep not rarely they load their kids with their burdens.
There should be a certificate that says that You can have childs
I think there should be some sort of "school" for us adults concerning things about their future like marriage, taxes, living independently, etc.
-So why do u want to have babies?
-Idk and i dont care, but i know for sure that i wont let them be vaccinated by the spy government
I've tried having talks with my mom about this stuff... and she tells me that it's not her fault I turned out a certain way... and then she asks...I raised your brother too and he's nothing like you.....I didn't realize my 50 year old mother needed me to explain what individualism is and that people perceive life through their mind, not the mind of others... so yes, I should not be like my brother, nor should you want me to be. I am me. I also believe I have two attachment styles.
I did the same things as you did... had a heartpouring crying session with my mom. It’s useless as she didn’t understand... what’s more, my younger sister turned out just ‘fine’, being the golden child and less impacted by my narc mother
you guys are brave to even bring this stuff up with your parents. my mom would just deny it all and give me a guilt trip for blaming her
It breaks my heart knowing I'm not alone. I wish I were. I've finally come to understand...my family just doesn't understated me and they don't care to try to understand. My brother laughs at me when I try to explain why he's so dependent on alcohol. Our childhood molds us into the adults we are today. I'm just glad the information is so easy for us to access. Our parents didn't have that luxury. It's not our parents fault they were never taught how to handle their shit ... so they were unable to teach us, because they're ignorant to it all. They feel like it's not personally effecting them so they don't really care. They're set in stone.
It´s funny how ignorant parents can be. My mother believes to this day, even after I talked about psychology a lot with her, that she raised me and my brother the same way (which is nonsense in itself because you can´t raise different individuals the same way, you have to modify the way how you treat them because they will react different way to the same stuff). In reality she and everyone else in my family did textbook example of splitting on scapegoat child (me) and golden child (my brother, and in the wider context of cousins the one who was the youngest child at the moment).
She is deeply in denial about making any mistakes. Everyone else was making mistakes except of her. IMHO she´s covert narcissist.
@@Mysikrysa that sounds exactly like my mom... she refuses to acknowledge her bad parenting. I don't blame her wholly because she was never taught how to do it.
Anyone else feel anxious while watching these videos because most times it’s forcing you to think about past trauma / current issues you have that you don’t want to come to terms with? Same
Yup pretty much sums it up
Yes!
Exactly!
Am I the only one who didn’t really scream in childhood
@@litinupcito2044 Nope, not at all. I literally felt like I had no idea how to scream at least until I was an adult, even though I used to hear it all the time with my loud, short tempered parents screaming all the time either at each other, or one of the 4 kids they decided to have together, even though they could barely even stand to be around each other half the time
I swear this woman has the most relaxing voice on the planet
Yes!!
Thank you so much!
Facts 💯
100% Right
🙂
It's your opinion, but I think the most relaxing voice, is our parent's(Maybe just Mother/Father, who knows)
It's just my opinion :3
I feel like so many people have kids and end up ruining them emotionally. Like why did you want kids if you don’t want to care for them properly? makes me so mad
Being a parent doesn't come with a manual or instructions - all sorts of things happen in life - most do the best they can - at some point the child grows Into an adult and has to take responsibility for themselves -
@@gazXspace I think Erik Erikson's 8 Stages of Development could act as a fairly decent guideline to understanding how a parent's behaviour can impact a child negatively or positively. But i doubt it'll ever become a best seller in the parenting section of a bookstore in North America.
Capitalism: do they want you healthy? No. Do they want you alive? Depends on your demographic...
People are just shit at being people. Unless we have mandatory adult education on how to raise a child, even if we have that in place, abuse will always be a constant.
I know some people who use religion as an excuse to not have planned parenthood, but then they go against their own "morals" and emotionally/physically abuse a child out of anger --pulling any card they can to justify their lack of ability to properly care for another human being.
Not everyone is like that, but there are those kinds of people who will abuse others and never take responsibility for their own actions
Harder than you think it’s so complex it’s mostly unintentional
idk my parents just seem to hate me- I'm not wanted and I'm surprised they didn't put me up for adoption or just drop me in the middle of nowhere. I got used to it. I was the last type and it's kinda sad but hey, if I wasn't my parents kid then some other poor kid would have to live through my trauma. At least I'm saving someone else.
It bugged me so much that 1 was type B and 2 was type A...
anyways I'm type A
Same with me. I am type A too.
Yes
I was waiting for her to go "if you are bugged by type B being 1 and A being 2, you are attachment style type ..." lol
You see this a lot in science. This is probably how it started. They started to investigate this with the focus on insecure people. (Type A) and ofcourse the others, secure people (type B). Then they found out type A had more variants so they made C and then D. It is however more logical to group the insecure types. So here you have it, Type B, Type A, Type C and Type D haha.
@@Bill2bearockstar yeah kind of like there are only 8 b-vitamins but the numbers go up to b12 because they had some in the list that they later found out not to actually be vitamins (and one they had twice i think haha)
her voice makes me feel loved and safe.
💯
Absolutely!🥰
Yes, this is my main reason want to learn and subscribe to this channel.
Childhood is like being drunk. Everyone remembers what you did, except you. It is never too late to have a happy childhood 🖖
Old Dudes Wisdom - Life requires Wisdom Channel no it is too late
And everyone know what you're doing and you (as a child) don't,idk looking back into my childhood I honestly think I was drunk since I've done stuff-
I don't remember anything about childhood except a few snippets and scenarios
I remember plenty of my childhood so speak for yourself?
@@RedRoseSeptember22
Well this change from person to person but most people don't remember their childhood
I'm an insecure avoidant I relate to that. Sometimes I'm seen as a loner other times I just absent. I just don't like mixing with others. Edit: There's only one person who interact with and that's Aurora Snow
Same I'm insecure avoidant too
Yeah,like at school I just focus on the stuff I have to do and i'm good like that,even though sometimes I wish I had the courage to go and talk to people but I feel tooo nervous to do so,bruh once my teacher didn't even realize I was in class cause everyone was talking except for me and she almost signed me absent-
Yep I understand you.I'm the same way.
@@mariaaiutacitu8608 sameee
I can relate
*where’s the “I was alone for all of my teens and went through multiple disorders alone and now never tell anyone my real feelings except i turn all my feelings into jokes” one??* 🤔🤔
i relate w this 🥱
Oh that called being a Sagittarius.
@@taniageorge5122 true, I think, but I’m not a Sag. 😂🤔 are you?
@@abbieamavi yeah 😅
No that is called The Chandler Bing style of attachment
I feel like these “attachment styles” are more of a spectrums.
Theres always a ratio in science
They are, you can have percentages of all of them
Right? Cause honestly I feel like I’ve expressed all the attachment styles in my life and try to work toward secure.
That's the problem with most typology. People forget to remind you, they're spectra. That's why typology gets so much hate too. Just look at Enneagram and MBTI- if you dig down deep enough, you'll realise they're both resembling spectra (though they may be hard to measure using percentages, approximate measuring can be used).
everything is a spectrum
Types of attachment styles
1. Secure (type B) 2:00
2. Insecure avoidant (type A) 2:11
3. Insecure ambivalent/resistant (type C) 2:24
4. Disorganized 2:40
How they act in environments
1. Secure (type B) 3:21
2. Insecure avoidant (type A) 4:05
3. Insecure ambivalent/resistant (type C) 5:00
4. Disorganized 5:55
end of video 7:37
I immediately scrolled to find this comment. Thank you.
Thbxx
Thank you, makes it so much easier for me.
Thank you
Alright but her voice just makes me feel so Loved I-
yes
It's so relaxing for me honestly
@@mariaaiutacitu8608 Ik!
It annoys me if im honest
Her voice is soo soothing
I like how it said "how you bonded with your family" but you never bonded with your family
Lmaoo the amount of relatable in this 1
Yeah if you never bonded with your family that makes you type A. You don't expect anyone to meet your needs and it's hard for you to attach to people because in your first fundamental relationships (the one with your caregivers) they didn't bond with you so you never attached to them and they never met your needs, fundamentally changing your attachment style for your entire life. Happened to me too brother. :(
@@alpharadisbad3927 Thank you and it's really okay uk :( care can come on a later stage in life. What we can fix is the present!
is this why i dont feel like i match one 🙄
@@alpharadisbad3927 right! That way I'm totally type-A since, I don't expect anyone to meet my emotional needs although whenever I do attach(which is very very very rare!) I'm the type-c. I get clingy and if I kind of feel being rejected then I reject the other person first!! Which overall kinda sucks!!!😖😥
my mom was my boss. her way, and no speaking up. you can imagine how this affected me
My parents are the same way
Same. I was soo rebelios to the limits
same here and my dad is working all the time so he doesn’t care or notice and whenever she tells him what’s happening she just says “oh she’s acting up again” like what i did was fully my fault and it’s usually not
@@ithoughtiwascishet1316 I feel bad for you :(
It's mostly my dad, but my mom does that sort of thing as well
Haha same 😡👍
Me explaining to my parents I have depression and there's this awesome channel on yt which helps me understand it better.
My parents: 𝗶𝗧 𝗶𝗦 𝗯𝗘𝗰𝗔𝘂𝗦𝗲 𝗢𝗳 𝗧𝗵𝗔𝘁 𝗗𝗮𝗠𝗻 𝗣𝗵𝗢𝗻𝗘!!
Me: goes back to being on my own and not sharing anything with them
It’s really like that though
Haven't seen this comment 1298 times already.
Are u sure you are not mentally abused by your parent?
lighthouse01 Some people just don't think mental illness are real and end up emotionally hurting those who admit to having them.
i don’t even tell them when i’m sad. they havent seen me cry in years bc i refuse to cry in front of them
I got an ad about attachment styles before I watched this...
I got one about relationship advice
LMAOO SAMEE
hello. stangncd SAME 🤣
Sameeeee
@@hello.stangncd600 Me too
im a type c- partly because my mom has anger issues and has mood swings where she will be decently nice and then the next scream at me for almost no reason a lot. she never talks to me about close stuff or emotions and ive never felt fully comfortable or able to comunicate my feelings issues or sensative or general conversation with her. (as she often turns it into a rant or argument) so ive built a wall around myself i only let down a bit for friends to reveal my sensative personality, whereas with my parents i am more agressive and angry and mean towards them :/. i am jealous of my sister's close relationship with her friends, with mine i feel like a spare wheel.
oohh babay same with me nd my mom
so sorry to read that. It perfectly describes my relationship with my dad. He’s a choleric and always screams at me for no reason at all. I know exactly how you feel. Stay strong. 🧡
You're not alone. I've gone through the same shiz with my mother. I'm a type C too. And can relate so much to what you wrote. I know how you feel.
That's exactly the kind of relationship that my mom and I had. My therapist had told me that, when a parent is unpredictable, it is the most damaging to the child. Even though my mom has passed several years ago, I still feel the effects of emotional abuse.
I'm a type C as well, but I don't know how or why. Both my parents are very tolerant people who want the best for my sister and I, who are always willing to talk and listen (although they have their own judgement they generally allow us to construct our own), they are both introverted and have healthy relationships. I am also often agressive or mean towards my parents and sister, and with my friends, either I let them down before they can hurt me or I get overly attached, sometimes revealing some deepest thoughts. When I try to explain to them that I am often angered and hostile, they cannot imagine it, and when I try to find an explanation as to why I do so I just can't. Yeah sure, anger is useless but it's just here!
Meeting new people
Others : Hey, what's your sign?
Me : What's your attachment style?
I'm #2. I was neglected as a child and learned to everything on my own.
same here. now I'm struggling to trust anyone because I'm not used to relying on others.
Same here.
I'm type 2 as well, I had to learn to do many things by myself, do to my moms working hours (my dad doesn't live with us). I have problems talking to people (I don't know what to talk about) or asking for affection and can only talk to my mom completely carefree.
@@toughsoftieyogi same ive been struggling
@@orion2601 im the exact same as this although my dads home but most of the time he is drunk
I wish UA-cam never removed the polls, they were my favourite thing about channels like this
Me too :(
Me three :(
me four :(
me five :(
Me six :(
I'm mostly #2) Insecure Avoidant (type A)
Anyone else?? 😓🤷♀️🤔🤔
Disorganized was spot on with the whole "seems like a nice person but is actually evils bit"
See, I’m nervous as heck when I first meet everyone. I’m shy, and don’t like anyone trying to talk to me. I’m insecure. But when I get comfortable in my environment I turn to style b. Secure. I am only secure if I know and trust the people around me. But if I’m being bullied, I’ll fight back, yet not trust anyone. Idk what I am.
It’s weird how we feel compelled to tell our story to people in the internet we don’t know, but people that you know you are very reserved
@@no-gracias9863 I guess the struggle is to try and still understand ourselves in the inevitable pursuit of happiness, having been failed by our parents unhealthy upbringing. Our family/parents dont have the solution/were part of the problem and so we try and reach out.
same here
Hey, it may be that you just have unresolved trauma from experiences in life. I was the same. With more positive experiences, psychotherapy, emotion code healing, acupuncture, energy healing, hypnosis plant medicine with a trusted facilitator and EFT etc or somatic experiencing and EMDR, I'm slowly becoming a secure person. Slowly. But yes, PTSD makes us like that. We need to invest in our healing ASAP. Please research and try releasing trauma from the body - it's such a relief!
@@skyejacques yes treatments help but they can be super expensive and not everyone can afford them. A good diet and exercise is a good place to start for most ie learning to love and take care of your SELF.
I have insecure avoidant and disorganised style. My mum should be secure attachment as she always want me to help her
Thanks for sharing! How do you feel after watching this video?
@@Psych2go I know myself better and catch myself and others in the signs mentioned
I have no attachment style at all. I am rather frightened of humans. Why do they stress herding together in social groups so much? I do not want to be attached to anybody. I do not want to depend on anybody nor have anybody dependent on me. I tried the social existence once and it ended extremely painfully for me. I promised I would never try it again. There is nothing wrong with having no attachment style at all. I have had no friends nor a girlfriend since 8 August 2000. I find things far safer, predictable, simpler, and logical without friends nor a girlfriend. I doubt I will ever attach to a human again.
@@indridcold8433 I should learn from you to be self sufficient
Celine Ong Honestly, it isn't a healthy way to be self sufficient. In fact quite the contrary. We are social creatures, and need a friend or two. It's also bad to be paranoid of other people for that social reason. That's their choice to be that way, but it's a lonely choice.
Im the third one. Sometimes I'm clingy, sometimes I'm not.
It’s real easy to be type C when your mother’s favorite phrase was “don’t speak unless spoken to”
Yep same here but she considered that respect so do I now
Or don't talk at all and just listen how disappointment you are, and if I tell my side she'll say your being disrespectful. BTW In Asian
It’s amazing how something you have no control over affects your entire life. What’s even more amazing is how parents seem to forget that.
You have every power to control your thoughts and actions everybody does it’s how you react to things that makes you a positive person work on yourself and love yourself and go from there you control your thoughts nobody else does work on your ❤️
I don't think the parents are aware of this, that childhood has a LARGE influence on someone's life, but yes I think they know childhood has _some_ influence
They aren't like this generation all digitalized and technology-savvy watching UA-cam vids, don't blame 'em, you're gonna be parent too, you're just lucky you're part of this generation
teresa reid thank you for this message. It means a lot
A Person your welcome try to get some self help books and meditate when you can just try to do things that make you happy ❤️
@@yub2.045 who's gonna be a parent too?
Omg your voice is just so calming♥️
Tysm for the likes this is the most I've ever gotten 😍☺️
I hate comments like these, but this one gets a like from me, because I agree. :)
Yes, I, too, _liked_ her voice, so I agree (see what I did there!)
@@Sheamuscz I know right?
@@Sheamuscz same
its the most you've ever gotten becuase you are getting people to like your comment as they agree
xd
I used to be so quiet that the whole class thought I was mute, Type A
In my childhood, when ma and pa speaks together, it always ended in arguments and fights. When no one talked, it was calm, so I guess that’s why I’m anxious about having a conversation that’s non-work related.
You can literally count my spoken sentences in a day on your fingers.
We're somehow the same, In my childhood life, my mom rarely talks to me unless it's necessary even if I talk to her a lot she doesn't really respond inshort, we don't have heart to heart conversations she was always cold to me if not angry I feel like, that is the reason why I'm always quiet even with friends 'cause I thought it is the right thing to do.
And I have less social skills than other people that's why, I sometimes avoid people or even my friends 'cause I feel like, if I said something that is not good they'll avoid me or never talk to me, again which made me having social anxiety.:
if anyone sees this..
have a donut 🍩
you are loved.
stay strong
Thanks!
@@avrxse
@@waffles9663 now go get yourself some icecream🍦;)
Thanks
Lmao I don't know why these types of comments are so cute
I grew up with seeing my dad rarely, I grew up with my grandma and got so close with her, she's now 80 and I'm 15, and I already know what's going to happen in the future. Grandma I love you, I'll look back to this when you are gone...
The time will eventually come, make the best of it.
Give her alot of love and respect❤😘Make Unforgettable memories for her💜💜💜Give her your best😍💜
Credo
I think your lovely 🌸 God bless you & your grandma xxx
I feel like I’m type c but I also have some type b characteristics
when i saw "insecure avoident" i then was like yeah this is me.
"the person probably has difficulity making friends" - hell yeah
What if they show signs in type A, B, and C in multiple different situations.
A self test would be nice.
Yeah i feel that i can relate to some of them but i can't indentify myself to be put in just one category
I couldn't say I'm just 1 type, I believe I range between the 2nd one, 3rd one, and 4th one depending on stress levels and situations.
Not everyone gets a trophy..deal
There are self tests on the web.
When you’re a type A but your younger sister is a type B
I’m not saying I a bit jealous but I am of how she can handle and make friends
Victoria Höglind Rönnowskolan 5B
SAME no I don’t want to go to talk to people i don’t know...listening to other people talk about things that do not interest me at all is boring...ughhhhh it drown up my energy to think properly when there’s so much action going on
@Victoria Höglind Rönnowskolan 5B ma whole family are introverts and am type A but ma sis and she is also an introvert but she is type B and admire her because she don't push people and have stable relationships it's not about being introvert or not I guess
@Victoria Höglind Rönnowskolan 5B same
I’m a type D man talk about jealousy
_Ngl tho as an A-Type when in a crisis, i feel like one of the most capable people in the room_
Loved the way you talked about it...a lot of studies are now showing how our early years primarily shape us who we are as our neutral pathways are growing and developing at its fastest rate. Like sponges, we are absorbing everything that's taking place around us.Also they say, that kids are the ones who know the art of being in the present, in the now completely, invariably it also makes them present and more observant towards everything, without filters. Since our consciousness on an every day basis is active only 2%-3% of the times and 97%-95% of us works from the subconscious, we are rarely in tune with our patterns. Almost takes half the life to begin noticing our imbibed patterns and it's only after that, we begin working on ourselves.
Thank you for the amazing videos 😊🙏🙏
It seems u did ur research😂👏
I used to be type A, but after being bullied by my 'best-friend' I've become a clear type C. Her catching me off guard with a 'betrayal' and manipulative tendencies make me now over-analyze and personalize every action someone does. It may my subconscious logic that makes me think that if I can find out what they actually think about me with their actions, I won't be backstabbed again. Almost 10 years on, nothing has changed. I hope one day I can go back to type A!
I’m a mix of secure attachment and insecure avoidant
I’m independent and rarely ask for help but I’m not afraid to make some friends or communicate with people.
I feel the same way
"Life is a balance between holding on & letting go" - Rumi ...and knowing when to do each one.
I am, disorganized... I do all the abusive thing to my two "friends" I have good friends these ones arent really good friends either but I've been have major PTSD this year and everything this woman has said is true
My attachment style formed from interactions with my peers instead of my parents. I'm somewhere between secure and insecure avoidant I think. The latter developed when I was getting bullied in school and kept losing all of my friends due to one thing or another, leading to a lot of trust issues, and I tend to avoid most social situations outside of school and work. I have trouble forming relationships, but when I do I try to recognize boundaries and not overstep them. And I know I can have a short temper when interacting with other people, but when my opinion is asked for on something I will be truthful and try to act as a mediator and think rationally about it.
Me: Insecure avoidant
Lesson from someone with experience: nobody is perfect, everyone needs at least one person to go to for help or you wil get crazy by talking to yourself
_I dunno, i got alotta voices in my head, sometimes it's chaos but i keep them under control, plus they always keep me company, i rarely ever feel truly alone_
Lol
@@spartanwar1185 Doesn't that mean you have more then 1 person in your body ? And if you do, how do you even live like that? Isn't it hard?
I'm not even kidding when yall started talking abt the way disorganized attachment styles act in school I just kind of went 😳 it's me in the real you guys
I realized after watching this video, I always thought I was just sad and didnt want to hurt my family and friends feelings but I really had insecure avoidance. TY sm❤
My ex is a disorganized attachment style, this makes so much sense and is going to help me with my depression
Which style blames their ex for their depression?
@@patrickx2420 Unless you know the person, it might be best not to make assumptions about the degree their past relationship(s) might or might not have affected their mental health.
I specifically avoid being early to avoid the anxiety of coming up with a good comment :c
Same,when I have the possibility to be early and one of the first comments I just don't comment at all
just type in "first", problem solved
I'm Type A
I rarely ask for help because I'm to shy or can barely speak up...
Same,I feel so embarrassed asking for help
Same,Even I'm type A
Same, me too
Same
I feel better now that other people understand me
Only a bit though
I still shy :(
Natsuki.chr://:{{Successfully Deleted}}://:((Uñdo))
Sayori.chr://:{{Successfully Deleted}}://:((Uñdø))
Yuri.chr://:{{Successfully Deleted}}://:((Úñdø))
Monika://:{{Sûcçeßfùll6 D3lëtêd}}://:((Ûñdò))
JUST MONIKA
JÜẞT MÓÑÎKÀ
JÙẞ5 MÔÑÏKÅ
J
JU
JUS
JUST
JUST M
JUST MO
JUST MON
JUST MONI
JUST MONIK
JUST MONIKA
JUST MONIK
JUST MONI
JUST MON
JUST MO
JUST M
JUST
JUS
JU
J
I like that you brought up the fact that these things can change. When I was a teenager I feel I had a mixture of 2 and 4 I was dealing with a lot and hadn't aquired those coping mechanisms yet but now feel I am a mix of 2 and 3 instead. Not great at dealing emotionally but learning none the less.
I used to have an insecure avoidant attachment style because I was ignored, yelled at constantly, and picked on... still get yelled at sometimes, but the bullying and communication barriers are gone. Now I have a secure attachment style. It’s never too late to change a child’s life. I’m a happy hooman and I shall be your friend because I’ve probably gone through what you have as well. You are amazing, keep it up. :)
I love that love plant in the head❤️
I'm mixed (type C and Disorganized)
Thank you for sharing! What do you plan to do next after realizing this?
@@Psych2go actually I don't know. Now I'm going through some challenging areas.
Comment section is eerily bare.
Her voice calms me down whenever I’m upset. Thanks for that☺️
Im type 3 (forgot the name)
Most of the time I reject people
But sometimes idk why I'm clingy around my friends
I usually blame my attachment style on my parents
For not giving me enough attention, or gave me too much
I get all mad when people reject me in some sort of way
I spread gossip and start drama
The voice is so lovely
Like if you agree🥺💛💛
I disagree
Arburgill H ok 💀
I agree!
It's weird cuz I feel like I'm mixed with A and C, and I could become a B if I had enough energy
I was just thinking about it, can we also be a mix. It also depends on the combination with the characters we relate to so it's influenced by external factors too...
With some people I would feel harmony, easygoing, with others I would shut down or feel rejection.....
@@peaceofmindofpeace1650 I completely understand, some of them solve your problems and others bring you problems
@@davidchen254 Yes wow that's the perfect description! That's it. Thanks.
Which one did you resonate with more?
@@Psych2go I think I would fit in B, secure for 60% and C insecure/independent 40%.
I think we can all shift within the spectrum without getting into extremes?
I'm Type A Attachment Style completely. It really explains some of my actions and how I see the world. Thanks for the video. Keep it up. Yes I would like to see a video about how to take care of our Attachment Style.
A while back, I was in emt school, talking to a few of my buddies who I was in class with. We were talking about drugs.
They asked me what heroin was like.
I said “a mother’s love…”
You know, the love you’ve never had…..
Try attempting recovery when you were abused and neglected growing up. Good luck. You’ll never get off maintenance.
Don’t do heroin kids. Don’t sniff pills. Don’t drink your problems away. Hug your kids. Don’t abuse them. Don’t torment them. Don’t blame them for your failures in life. Don’t take down their dreams and hopes before they’ve even had a chance to pursue them.
These really help me learn so much more about the world. Thank you for doing what you are! It helps many of us understand others and ourselves ^w^
We are glad you find this helpful! What other videos would you like us to make next? :)
@@Psych2go Probably something with personality changes? Like, what causes them?
Attached to each other: garnet
Attached to someone: pearl
Attached to no one: Amethyst
Attached to everyone: steven universe
Attached to no one: Amethyst,
cool I always liked this gem a lot, now I know why.
I guess I'm an Amysthest
instead of amethyst i might say peridot, but i guess she's not technically a part of the main group
@@longredroad4249 are you pieces?
Stan LUMITY
I'm not sure how accurate the details of these descriptions are. I know many people that would fit into one type or another. But none of them react to crisis the way you describe. I know an insecure ambivalent type C, but who in crisis acts passive aggressively and withdraws in silence, not feeds into drama in a traditional way. I know a type B, but who does suffer from depression and PTSD and loses temper in certain situations (and asks for help with that). I know a person who is a mix of type A and C. Also, I've never met anyone, who in times of crisis avoids emotional situations and thereby helps by allegedly being objective. Emotional avoidance and difficulty identifying one's emotions usually go along with neither objectivity, nor successful conflict resolution.
Yeah, I'm a type C but drama is tiring so I'd usually just stay silent and prefer to keep the argument live on in my head for several days. And those days are the worst days I've ever experienced which basically means almost always
@@suinara6599 I do that too, and sometimes talk about it ages later. If a difficult situation arises I'll just ignore it, even though my head will be working on it the whole time. Never indulge in drama, some type C do though.
Insecure avoidant style I make friends & start conversations easily I’m very selective on who I have a close friends I currently don’t have any I’m a loner at heart I do enjoy people every once in a while I tend to be very honest and can sometimes come off as judgmental to others. I also feel like sometimes I can be an disorganized style as well I’m not abusive but I acknowledge I can be manipulative if need be and passive aggressive
THE WAY THIS COMMENT DESCRIBED ME-
your def. not alone
Pretty much described me. My little brother is type B and my mom is type A
“If you have never been hated by your child, you have never been a parent.”
-Bette Davis
No
Not true
Unless your child is rational and you are a rational parent. Idk who Bette Davis is but they have problems making hasty generalizations.
you’ve just never been a bad parent. if your kid loves you you raised them right. dunno who Davis was but clearly they’re a piece of crap
Bekah L.
the quote wasn’t “if your kid has never said “i hate you!” then you’ve never been a parent” if we were talking little kid “hating” that mom and dad didn’t give them a cookie that’s different because that’s not real hatred and resentment against them.
in my experience true hatred isn’t something that fades with a good nights sleep. you don’t get over it because it’s more than one thing, it’s everything that hurt you that you never got closure for.
that’s what hatred of a parent is.
that small child “i hate you!” isn’t real. it’s just a child being a child. hate of a parent is constant and it breaks the bond between parent and child
While I was growing up my mom had a deadly brain cancer and my dad wasn’t a father he’d drink, smoke, hit us and did many other things I had to mature on trauma, I never ask for help and do stuff myself because that’s what I had to do to survive when I was younger 😕
Amanda's voice is so soothing-most relaxing. Whenever I click on a psych2go video I wanna listen to her ^-^
I've always enjoyed watching your videos. My counselor recently told me to do research on attachment styles. So the first place I go is here. And thankfully, you have a video on it. So thank you :-)
Im the avoidant loner, I was secure before moving into a dysfunctional household at 14. I acted out by being promiscuous. After hitting rock bottom, I now have a therapist and distant myself from that household.
I'm a type C and my dad is the disorganized, it feels like hell when im near him
I love this channel. It lets me understand so much about how my mind works. It's so interesting! I'm sure others have it the same way.
I'm the second one, but I was *taught* to be the second one. Asking my parents or teachers for help would get me berated, punished, insulted... it was made very clear since I was a toddler that other people deserved help (in fact, I was expected to help as much as possible) but I did not.
It took an encounter with an old classmate who claimed the most important thing I'd taught her during my tutoring was to ask for help and that there's no shame on it to remind me that I too have the right to be helped when I find something difficult. Now I'm more of the first type but sometimes I still need to remind myself that yes, I can ask for help. In fact, experience has taught me that most people are happy to be able to help!
Dad was either the first or the second; Mom's definitely the fourth. He wanted me to be self-reliant but overdid it; she was abusive. She's perfectly capable of charming the legs off most chairs but will fly into a rage when she encounters someone who resists; often, the target of the rage is not the strong person (because they're, you know, stronger than she is) but someone else that she perceives as weaker and therefore a good punching bag.
😕Type A😕
Online If I’m asked if I’m ok I explode about every little thing that upset me,
but in real life I just get confused on what they want me to say.
But really I get super depressed about many small things,
and my inability to connect,
now after finding a way to drop out
I miss the loose friendships I had,
even if that’s not what I imagine when
I imagine friendship I still miss it.
I had a dream after leaving school,
in this dream I was riding a horse drawn carriage with my friends sitting across from me, they were laughing and talking but I was just smiling and not engaging. When we arrived the place was grand and and made of marble with pillars that towered up to the ceiling, my wonder lust at this point made me lose track of my friends.
The steps that lead in went down two feet, before reaching a fork left and right I went right and again more steps four feet this time, and after turning left I realized without acting it out that it was a dream,
by noticing shaggy and Scooby-doo standing to the right of me waving in next to Scoob against the wall was the rest of the gang folded and stacked on a metal pantry shelf.
The room was a large cafeteria, black manta and some other pop culture figures where sitting mixed with real people I knew, I instantly got jealous because all the seats were taken by people who didn’t even exist sitting with my friends who looked to be enjoying the conversations. So I decided to get my food and figure out what to do for a seat later, the line still had people in it surprisingly enough, but someone or something triggered my mood in the line while I was holding a PIBB xtra when this happened and I threw it as hard as I could into the table area,
bad choice cause you can’t get two drinks and after getting the rest of my food and disrespected looks from the lunch ladies it was time to find a seat.
Which is where the Dream kinda fades but I believe I tried taking a seat when someone was throwing away their trash, we got in an argument because of this and I believe my friends defended this other person because they had the seat first.
That’s really all I can kinda remember, the first half was super memorable but the rest seems to fade.
I feel like I'm a type A.
Asking for help is... not my strong suit.
The disorganised attachment is exactly like my partner. And I’m so glad they aren’t certainly set in stone because it’s difficult and they know how they act and they hate it which makes them hate themselves. I’m not sure how to fix this but there’s my experience. I love you vids, keep up the great work!
I listened to this to identify myself and my husband who I am struggling to get along with. It fits me as an avoidant. And I identified my husband as well. I'd love to change mine to be assured, it would be easier if I can identify my emotions. So now I'll see if I can find a therapist like suggested. Thank you
It is bad that whenever I type hello with an exclamation mark at the end I feel rude because I feel like I'm yelling at the person? ☆Stay safe everyone♡
I guess I'm the insecure avoidant type, although I wouldn't consider myself a loner. But I'm selective with friends
Ok. This makes me feel better about myself. I have a secure attachment style.
Thank you!
This information is very useful for all of us to better understand ourselves and others. When I became a teacher, I had to learn this, but it doesn't hurt to refresh your memory once in a while! :)
For some reason I’m insecure but I don’t avoid talking or making friends (I actually find it quite easy to make friends and I’m type A which she talked about 2nd and my name starts with A
Me: Insecure Avoidant (type A)
Also me: acting like i'm a socialable person, had kinda little circle & shy to ask ppls
I find it interesting because I definitely feel like while examining my childhood and my sisters up until now, as grown adults, I feel like we had different attachment styles. I believe my attachment style was secure while my sister seems to have some sort of blended ambivilant/disorganized attachment style.
Definitely an avoidant style.
I usually feel pretty calm in situations many people can consider stressful like exams, organising events and dealing with deadlines and have no problems with consecration . Also my more extroverted nature helps with communications so I was never a loner.
However, I notice that it takes a loooot time to develop strong connections with others, I feel very uncomfortable near people with strong mood swings, usually set extreme boundaries and expect others to do the same, definitely have trust issues or even light form of paranoia.
Can't recall what experiences in my childhood could make me like that, don't really know if it's unhealthy or just the way I am.
Type A, Disorganized and Type C Cuz I’ve developed different feelings with different people
Thanks for inspiring me to do youtube
i was insecure avoidant. still some things there but i was able to grow and try to do better!
Yes please, thank you for a video on managing one's attachment styles. 😊 Simple and cognitive behavior techniques would ve fabulous. Thanks again friends🌷
I'm probably type A
Type D is definitely Steven U.
Tru
I transitioned from each a, b, and c throughout my life.
I used to be secure till 2017. In that year, I found myself struggling with my social relationships, without exception, up to this day.
Am not sure if this really can happen psychologically, but my attachement style has changed into being more insecure and avoidant dismissive. It was due to a change in my environment and lifestyle.
💔
I'm Type A. Insecure Avoidant... 🤔 Now I know why I dislike being with people, just focusing on work or hobbies and keeping my circle of friends very small. 🌸🌺
~Throws up a peace sign even though I’m alone when she mentions type c ~
Hahaha cries
The heart want to care and love but the brain doesn’t know how 😢
Hi! Thanks for the video. I'd love a video about how to manage your attachment style. I think my childhood created a mostly type A, with a little bit of C, but I have been working a lot on adjusting my attachment style to more secure and this video really helped me appreciate and measure my progress. So thanks a bunch! Keep up the good work. And I love love love the animation... so cute and easy to connect to deeply good work Nayeli! and everyone
Thank you so much for this information, I need this very much. Please make a video about how to undo or rewire one's attachment issues. I think I'm the insecure-avoidant one. It's so difficult for me to go deep emotionally with anyone around me. I have issues with intimacy and expressing my emotions and feelings. I look forward to hearing more from you.
I'd love to take a test, though I can identify myself with two of the types.
You can google an attachment test online, they show you are made up of all of the attachment styles :)
when you want to graduate in psychology but is afraid to find out more things about how trauma destroyed your life.
This videos help me soooo much to write characters! Thank you so much!
Yes please to both options. Love voice too! So relaxing.