You should add a “total debt” counter in a corner of the screen as you go through. And as you get into the debt, the counter goes up. Would be a nice visual and a add more weight to see a number climbing and climbing throughout the interview
@@lilymohsye it wouldn’t be much. It’s simple math which he’s doing by hand anyway during the interview. All that’s needed to add in editing is a graphic and I actually see he’s doing it now in current videos. Just a little update graphic for total debt so far
She said she’s not good with confrontation which I’m sure is why she isn’t quitting her job (confrontation) or demanding that her kids father pay child support (confrontation). She needs to go through the short term pain of confrontation and struggle for the long term benefits. At least do it for your kids man. Hard to watch.
There is a limit. Yes she needs a better job. But signing up for a job at a toxic company that throws her to the wolves is going to break her emotionally, and she will spend more. Unhappy people tend to spend more. Obviously there’s an adjustment period to every job, and it’s uncomfortable. But there is a line between throwing yourself into a blender vs. adjusting to a new job
100%. She’s allowing her children to go without, because she won’t demand child support. That money isn’t hers just to play with, it’s hers to use to creating a good, safe, healthy life for those babies.
It’s more to the story. As much as she pushing back and everything else she most likely not telling the truth on the situation with her kids. Sounds like her mom take care of the kids not her
I never went for child support for my 4 kids and reading what you commented just made me rethink my stance on it. I could just put it into a savings account for them.
YES her workplace seems toxic af and has gaslit her into staying like there won’t be anywhere better. She has a lot of magical thinking in regards to her finances. She is not living in reality.
@@swelldritch2774 sure. She's a glorified cashier in her own words. Hard to do that from home. She's probably very good at her retail, in person job. She needs to take Caleb's advice and get some skills/experience to change careers
Not in $16/hr corporate retail. If she finds another small, compassionate employer she'll be good. Those are dwindling. Caleb's advice to expand her experience and education to give her more career options will give her more flexibility.
So… 99% of her income goes to needs…. With $26 to spare; owes $31,000 in bad debt, and has two kids of different fathers. She doesn’t take the kids’ fathers to court to receive child support, and has spent 7 years working for a company that STILL pays her $16.50 an hour!!! AND, the job is so distant from her home, she pays $70 a week in gas (not counting oil changes). Incredible. She COULD get out of this situation but she is complacent where she is 😢
Girl, we are all contributing to her. Recognize when someone is on welfare she doesn’t have to be receiving cash, but she’s receiving everything else. She lives too high off the hog.
This nailed it. This is an incredibly easy situation to get out of. She could literally get a job anywhere in less than 2 weeks paying more. She would get 2 child support payments every month with a couple court filings. There must be more to the story
This is so sad. She needs to get a grip because her girls are not going to be able to go to college without taking out massive debt. She needs to make a change and stop expecting a different result from doing the same damn thing
I cannot believe I sat through 45 min just to finally hear that she basically breaks her back just because she doesn’t want to notify someone that she needs time off.
I love that you listened to her when she asked you to stop yelling. You took the feedback on the spot and adjusted automatically. Amazing behavior and showing that you are truly here to help your listeners and those you have on the show.
i would love to see you do an audit of someone who is not absolutely shitting the bed financially. or maybe even someone who is doing a great job. some 7/10 or 10/10 audits would be cool to see
I'm actually pretty interested in going on the show , I am kinda half way with my finances, I live and breathe my budget, but I have a couple bad debts Im digging out
And yet, if she leaves, or gets fired, her job will close her file and she will be replaced by the time she walks out the door! $16.50 for 7 years? Jeeezzzzz
Not when you make enough food to have leftovers that can last 2-3 days. If she meal plans throughout the week she can meet it or at least come close. She also needs to seek out food pantries to offset her food cost.
She’ll probably trick some man into paying her AND her 2 kids(by TWO DIFFERENT MEN) way through life. Same as every other single mom. Or, her kids will end up in jail doing illegal things to make money to support their own mother.
Sounds like she gets help from her Parents. I know my Mom got a lot of help from relatives and friends when I was little, not financially per se, but a lot of picking up from school and baby sitting and having lunches or dinners et cetera.
It was sad to see her clearly trapped in fear and false job security. The moment you told her " there is no security this job could fire you" I hope it clicked for her thay she has to be open to positive changes.
Impressive video. I started a bit late (graduated from my doctorate program at age 30 in 2014 with 170k in school loan debt). Managed to pay off my debt by 2019 and currently have a house and 250k total in investments (combo of profit share, 401k and a brokerage account). I'm not very knowledgeable in investing, so I just have my investing currently in index funds mainly Too but have been putting a lot into Schd the past few months. I don’t know if that's the optimal strategy, but psychologically it is very set it and forget it, and prevents me from obsessing over individual stock performance.
I advise you work with an advisor because i have personally worked with an investment advisor to diversify my $200k portfolio across multiple markets, resulting in over $580k in net profit from high dividend yielding stocks. With the right guidance, you can also make informed investment decisions and achieve your financial goals.
@@james.atkins88 Please tell me how can I connect to your advisor. My funds are being murdered by inflation, therefore I'm looking for a more profitable investing strategy to put them to work.
It's best you do your due diligence, I have my portfolio overseen by ‘Julia Ann Finnicum’ and her qualifications speak for itself. Most likely, the internet is where to find basic info, she has a noticeable page for consulting.
@@james.atkins88 Thanks for sharing, I did my own little research, and your advisor looks advanced and experienced. I wrote her and I scheduled a phone call. She seems experienced, I hope she doesn't ignore me.
This lady doesn't seem to value herself. That's why she isn't willing to demand child support or demand higher pay. Girl, you were brave to come on the show and you were smart enough to see that you have an issue and to start trying to fix it. You are better than you think you are and I have high hopes for you. At the least, seek some child support. The extra money will decrease your burden and you will be more emotionally available to your kids.
My guess is she is conflict avoidant based on the observation that 1) doesn't want to demand child support (she hinted that she didn't want to ask that of the guy...it wouldn't be worth it), 2) getting a new job (would require her to have that conversation of quitting), 3) dealing with her parents
@@TuBui2 she also got triggered when Caleb raised his voice at her. Definitely unresolved trauma/ not developmentally sound for a 28 yr old adult. She’s super conflict avoidant.
shes is not brave, she's a failure And the father of her children is broke and has no money. She wouldnt get anything anyway. Hes already in jail, what are you going to do to him
This girl cannot handle any level of confrontation--she just crumbles. Explains why she would rather struggle than seek child support. Girl, you are a single mom raising 2 boys and working 60 hours per week. You have earned your space in this world, and you deserve respect. Own it! The only thing I wish Caleb would have pushed back harder on were all the pets, but I know that's a touchy subject. She mentioned dogs plural, a cat and a lizard. Sooo much money that she just can't afford right now.
I would feel a lot better about the pets if she didnt love them more than her own kids My LIZARDS need this, my LIZARDS need that! ANYTHING for the lizards! Kids: *crickets*
Caleb I appreciate you asking if she was okay after yelling. And then not arguing with her when she said it didn’t help. You’re passionate, but never overly combative, and it really goes to show that you care about these peoples’ situations. Great vid as always!
@@indytaker869 My guy, just go through the comments and read about how many people are turning their life around just from watching this video. If you really believe this is true, then everything in life is exploitation, and nothing you can do to help someone will ever do them any good. Do you understand how stupid that is?
@@indytaker869 But yet people volunteer to go on his channel. These videos could/can actually be helping viewers. It's not always solely for entertainment purposes.
@@indytaker869 These people aren't forced on here and of course it's entertainment but he also giving good financial advice to these people, plus a lot other shows wouldn't even ask if someone's okay.
When she tried to justify her having the pets as them being rescues - that’s even worse. You shouldn’t be ‘rescuing’ without an ample ability to care for them (without going into credit card debt). It’s irresponsible. I get that sometimes major things happen with our pets and in that case there is insurance, or sometimes debt companies that specifically cater to emergency vet care - but daily expenses should never go on credit because that means you can’t afford them.
She goes into overwhelm very quickly. Her life sounds very stressful. What she's not hearing is Caleb telling her she's already WORKING MORE THAN SHE SHOULD HAVE TO to survive. She's not hearing that he's rooting for her.
@@bloodCount8895 No, that's what happens when you don't have a support system or family that can financially support her to finish her own goals to provide a better life. Too many comments here about how it's her fault because she had children. Unlike some of the other women I've seen on this channel, white influencer chicks that obviously come from privilege, she is obviously not. There is more to her story than having unprotected sex at least two times.
@@Eleanor.Moseman 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 You are absolutely correct. There is more to the story here and it will explain why she has such low self-esteem. Some people literally believe they deserve to be abused and do not seek better treatment or living conditions. It’s heartbreaking but she needs more therapy/coaching to even learn how to look up and set higher goals.
Yeah she could make way more with better hours doing CNA work or phlebotomist work. Or she could be an actual shift manager for any fast food company and make more too. Store managers in fast/fast casual make good money too but the hours can really suck. She has too much going on in her personal life to be wasting her time making so little.
Why? Many people stay on the same hourly for years and don’t get more. It is up to the person to look for opportunities for better pay or a better job. Opportunities are not entitled or just land in your lap with no effort.
Caleb spends all this time making us content. The least we could do is get him on Island of Love or something. Find him the right soul mate that he can financial audit.
This story reminds me of my mom, she worked for the same employer for so long that she felt like she couldn’t find another job, and they knew that too! She hardly got any raises for her entire career even though she was a hard worker and even got job offers from other people she never took them because she was afraid of learning a new job. ❤Daisy - you have to believe you can find a new job and can prove yourself there. If this job appreciated you they would pay you a livable wage. My mom is retired now but totally regrets not moving on, she realizes how much income she lost out on. It is scary but you can learn and adapt. ❤
@@mmp495 Yeah, it's a damn shame... But do you think the "Child Support" would have actually went to you? That's the problem, extra money doesn't mean we are children would have been helped any differently.
she's fixed in this mindset of not upsetting anybody, not confronting, making others' lives easy and constantly going against her own interests in the process. 2 kids but she won't even consider asking for child support, a job that doesn't pay enough but she won't leave, she's lending money she knows it's not coming back, it is maddening how many women in this world are raised to be like this and therefore be taken advantage of. Sending her a big hug and the best vibes, she deserves way more than this. She's a fighter and she'll get to a better place in the way only single moms know how to do it, hopefully she'll eventually invest in mental health resources to correct some of her patterns
Folk are forgetting she started out with 0 financial knowledge + was a mother since basically childhood. She’s in survival mode and has to have a wall up to keep from being anxious about everything. She’s clearly starting to try and learn because only in the past year she learned stuff from TikTok and probably inspired her to apply to get audited by Caleb. She’s going to come to terms with changing her job on her own- this experience and what she’s exposed to online is helping seed the ideas and courage to change her situation and learn how to better budget.
She strikes me as an overworked, exhausted single mom that is a bit simple, trusting, and naive, and has been taken advantage of by tons of terrible people. I hope things get better for her soon.
@@bunaynayslay really? Most people don't plan on having children but something slips. That's like saying say no to drugs works. She was 16 and none of us hasn't made bad decisions that young.
Classic case of putting others first coupled with conflict avoidance. Kids' needs OK, but their wants, giving over 100% to her employer, not asking her exes for help, rescuing pets, lending $$ to friends, etc. Her natural loyalty and kindness are biting her in the ass. Caleb, I too think she is being taken advantage of...it's a problem lots of ppl suffer from, myself included at times.
other people have brought up the possibility that her employer might be flexible with her hours for her kids or allowing her kids to hang out while she works so she doesn't have to pay for childcare. But everything else, you have a point!
@@sabias3932 i guarantee she doesnt even take off from her job to take care of her kids that often. how often do kids really get sick? and shes hourly so she isnt being compensated for that time either. she is literally too stupid to survive.
Child support could easily be taking $600-1000 a month off that 98% budget. She needs to go fight in court immediately. Letting herself be way to pushed over my her baby daddies, her job, etc. rooting for you girl- go out there and get fierce. Stop letting yourself being pushed over!
@@imnotawasteoftime it’s not. The government doesn’t care if you have a job, you have a kid. You either figure out how to provide for that child or the IRS comes. They would have to figure it out because that are obligated.
@@marissaboland958 just because the irs comes, doesn't mean that person will magically get a job. If they DO get a job, it's usually just long enough to make a couple payments, and then they quit. Essentially buying time until courts/irs come after them again.
For her to say she doesn’t have some type of trauma around yelling but says she was triggered is interesting. Sure people don’t like being yelled at but her demeanor absolutely changed and she became extremely flustered when asked if she was ok. The simply asking if someone is ok doesn’t make it better but it helps to know how to proceed. Hopefully she gets a better job so she can get health insurance and get therapy to talk about this.
I think it’s more than just the trauma you described. I have a feeling that something really bad happened to her and that’s why she had two kids when she was still a teenager. I also think whatever happened to her has a lot to do with why she won’t pursue child support, because she doesn’t want to face the father. Poor thing! I hope she gets the therapy she needs to turn her life around.
And it’s insane that she has $26 leftover without making even one mistake, two kids, and no savings no investments no retirement and she “doesn’t live alone”. She isn’t surviving, she is barely scraping by. I fully understand needing flexibility and the ability to bring her kids to work. There has to be something better than this situation.
@Always, Emilia she can't even afford an oil change at this point, or to take her kid to the doctor if they get sick or hurt, or take her pets to the vet. I bet her $200 grocery budget isn't accounting for all of the eating out she does.
@@TheCoolwhipped I was thinking that, too, about the groceries. Ugh I really hope she figures it out. Maybe she’ll watch the episode and read the comments.
I know we watch this to see Caleb grilling people and losing his shit at stupid decisions, but I appreciate that he's equally as positive if they do something good
I can't believe I didn't think about this before, but Caleb, I would highly recommend directing parents in financial situations like hers to consider applying for the local Head Start program. High quality free childcare for families in vulnerable situations. Serves children 6 weeks through 5 years, and sometimes provides transportation as well. It is offered in all 50 states, and is a federally funded program. I have a BS in early childhood education and in the middle of a MA in Ed Research & Evaluation. My specific career field is Head Start. Every Head Start family also worked with a family advocate who's job is to help the family navigate the situation and work towards financial independence
That's great if it works, but many of those programs end up being ran by people who couldn't care less about anything but money, and either refuses to help, or outright makes peoples' lives worse.
Her kids are above age 9 but this is still fantastic you mentioned all of this! I'd never heard of it before but I also don't have the kids so there's that!
I would hope she is getting government programs. She should qualify. Wish her luck, feel sorry for her. She seems unsure of herself. We don’t know her background.
I hope she digs deep and finds the courage to find a new place to work, for her to make 16.50 after 7 years is insane. She deserves much more for her loyalty.
She’s not being loyal, she’s just being lazy, unambiguous, and passive. She’s working cheap retail, they don’t need anybody special, they just need anybody to sit there for the low wage.
I guarantee in those 7 years, even with whatever raises they've given her (if any) she's probably making less now than when she started due to inflation. Probably takes a pay cut every single year with the reduced buying power.
It's sad because unlike a lot of people previously on the show she's willing to work hard. Her mentality and situation is keeping her down relative to the work she's putting in. Hope she figures it out.
Also getting pregnant out of wedlock twice by two different daddies... No college degree... Excuses galore... Horrible spending habits... This woman is extremely irresponsible
I'm a single mom as well with zero help. It took me busting my butt working three jobs and driving myself into the ground to make ends meet to come to the realization I need ONE really good job., and found it. I've been here for almost five years and they know my child comes before a job. There are great employers out there and are family orientated, it's become more common. I REALLY hope she finds a better job.
Same question for the guest as with you: why are you not getting child support? It’s your child’s right to that money. By not getting it, you are letting someone rob your baby every month. Every month. If the sperm source is a loser then so be it, but at least put that in as a legal obligation.
I don’t think she realizes that she’s reliant on those credit cards to get her by every month. If she stops using them, she’s screwed. If she continues to use them, she’s screwed. She’s trapped herself and she is avoiding the reality of it.
Caleb has some great emotional intelligence. He listens to his guests very well and seems to always ensure that he is not being harder on them than they can handle. You see it in a lot of his videos but the moment at 23:13 showed it off very well too. He immediately diffused the situation to show his intentions are meant to highlight the importance of the situation. When his consoling was not received well, he swiftly got the interview back on the focus while bringing his attitude down while not changing his manner of tackling the topic. These videos are great to listen to just to hear these genuine interactions between people in vulnerable situations and an unbiased aid. Keep up the amazing videos Caleb! Don't forget to take time for yourself too!
Yes! And I think she needs therapy. There is obviously some underlying issue, the security, the sadness/anger and picking up the rescue pets. I hope she gets better with herself and her money
@@michael_harren It's all true. You people are such nancies. Volunteers come on and he goes about helping them in a way that is entertaining. Why wouldn't he record it and profit? He's giving them a free service that *they asked for*
@@Ayaymeer Ignorance is bliss and “YES MEN” are dangerous. She probably has never had anyone tell her she is not doing a good job. It’s a shock to her system.
@@shroomssadow4981i think it's quite the opposite too many people telling her she's no good. Most people are triggered by what they're most exposed to.
Lol, I watch this show faithfully and whenever he starts going through the checking accounts I get the urge to go through mine and see what I've been spending crazy on. He's like a financial accountability coach. Literally, I went from having $500 in a savings account with Ally before watching to having $8500 in an account 8 months later since watching bc I'm super aware of my spending. Thank you Caleb!
@@CalebHammer Thank you! Seriously. I'm no longer in an abusive relationship with my money or my credit score bc of this series. Please keep going! You have no idea how much this helps people.
I had 5k in my savings at a point (January 2020) but my job laid a bunch of people off so I had to use the money to take care of myself and I moved from la to Florida because I was 20 and moving because I was contractually obligated to do so (me and my mom did a contract together) and I used the rest of the money to pay for a place to stay at until Igor a job. I had been saving for almost the past 3 years on and off but not for my long term future and only have to more money when I blew off money and to buy things I wanted but then once I started watching Caleb I started saving again and within the past 3 weeks I’ve saved $815 and by the end of the year I’ll have been able to have $7,200
Her self-esteem is horrible if she is willing to tolerate being underpaid and the bum fathers not contributing. So sad to see. She deserves so much better. She's still so young and can turn around these bad decisions.
@@AnimeBeefRandoms That isn’t the only problem. The men are also to be blamed and shamed for abandoning their kids. Everyone involved is a mess. I just find it amazing that having a complete family is seen as something rare and a miracle in America as someone coming from a culture where everyone is married and has a complete family and situations like hers are almost nonexistent
i honestly sympathize w her so much... she's been a mom since she was a kid and it's clear her intentions are nothing but good. i'm proud of her for coming in here especially since she said she is afraid of confrontation. she's clearly the type of person to always give to others but never take anything for herself. a genuinely good person who's been taken advantage of by everyone from what it seems like... she's trying her best and i really hope things get better for her and her kids. sending love ❤
Damn this was a tough one. I just feel so bad for her. Clearly she’s just been in survival mode so long that she can’t see a way to better her situation. I really hope she does well
I hope she’s stops letting her mom have access to her card, one of the reasons being she doesn’t wanna lose cash isn’t a good one either because of course we all lose stuff sometimes and sometimes it’s cash but it’s hard to lose cash when you have a wallet and just value money
@@iosgaming2824 Idk having her mom have access seems like the smallest problem. Sure it is not ideal but there was a total of $23 spend on it so it doesn't look like her mom is abusing the card in any way.
@@Sadreath yeah but the thing is she just shouldn’t have access to it tbh but your definitely right in comparison to everything else it’s pretty minuscule
Before watching Caleb and a few other finance UA-cam videos I always thought that ending the month with nearly nothing in your bank account was normal. I didn’t realize that I was living paycheck to paycheck nor that I had a lifestyle I couldn’t afford. So glad I am learning and educating myself, looking forward to the future and managing my finances as I continue in college. Thanks Caleb!
Caleb you have helped me pay off $20,000 of debt in less than 6 months and we are on such a better track to being financially free. THANK YOU for these videos.
I see people like her a lot in my day to day. They fear change, they're scared of losing their income, they don't realize that credit cards are the reason theyre getting by every month, they've chosen to be comfortable in with the job they have when they could make more anywhere else. It's a really hard state of mind to get out of. She came on the show but unfortunately I don't think she's ready to make the changes she needs.
She can start as a shift supervisor at stsrbucks for $20 (plus tips which can put you at 23-25 an hour depending on the store you are at) and it is also time and a half
Animal behavior major here with a tip Caleb should use on these episodes! Caleb, love what you said about not being able to afford pets isn’t helping them. It’s very true. Something you should tell people though in these situations is to look for LOCAL PET FOOD BANKS. I guarantee you that any local pet bank would give her free food and litter for the dogs and cats until she can get out of this. All they need is proof of income and situation. She can also even get some free vet care or low cost on vaccines etc. but it can be a real lifesaver for people. When I worked at an animal shelter, all we wanted was pets to stay in their homes. We rather give assistance in a trying time with food, litter, and vet care, even toys, then have someone not be able to afford the pet.
Food banks are a bit different to not having money for expensive specialist reptile enclosures though. Reptile enclosures can cost thousands, especially if she has a large lizard. I doubt if she had a bearded dragon or a skink she would need a custom enclosure
@@matthewhiggs4805 oh, absolutely. She shouldn’t have exotic pets in her situation. I have a cat I feed off a food bank because I can’t afford her prescription food. But my two ferrets are 100% on me and I budgeted for them. I agree, there’s no way she is custom building for a gecko etc. depending on the lizard she could try Facebook marketplace for cheap stuff but, I think she may need to consider rehoming him/her. One exotic vet bill can be killer.
I worked at a animal clinic for 4 years, if you can’t afford to take care of the pet properly don’t get it, it’s selfish and irresponsible and she already has 2 little kids she needs to prioritize cause clearly she ain’t doing that
i mean no one knows her situation the way we just saw it in this video. they probably see her blowing it like crazy and thought it was okay to ask to borrow money. the not paying it back is completely fucked up though
Honestly they probably worked out quickly she's timid and won't confront them about it. Not saying it's right but she gives that vibe just in the interview. Easily exploited so someone will.
I’ve dealt with people like this girl before. She will go home and think a lot about this. The fact that she talked about leaving her pets out of her budget means she’s seeing the patterns but things aren’t clicking yet. I think her 3 month follow up will show some positive momentum.
It really is the most obvious first step. Get rid of any pets. She doesnt feel comfortable moving too quick but this really need to happen asap. Hopefully she has a better understanding of her budget now
@@marie-andreec5164 Yes, but they are still pets. When you have real kids everything comes second or third. Not sure if its a culture thing, but in Denmark here ppl would tell you to grow up if you put your pets on par with your kids
@@marie-andreec5164 as in, if you have real kids. I get that ppl who live alone get attached to their pets. Makes 100% sense. But keeping pets you cant afford will only hurt your real kids down the line. I cant have that
She’s a manager based on lack of oversight not based on pay or responsibility. Seems like false prestige. Sometimes that makes people happy or boosts their ego so the won’t leave.
Absolutely. My former boss “absorbed” the job of two other managers/directors lateral to her and she thought she was SUCH a big shot because of her title, amount of responsibility and people reporting to her and her minimal raise. Her raise might have been good but NOT 2-salaries worth of the work she absorbed and the tyrant she became 🙃 she got pissed when I left after a $2 raise (mind you, AFTER the company raised the cost of our health benefits that came out to >$16,000 out of pocket for me, for my family of 4). “BUT I GAVE YOU A FANTASTIC RAISE!”, she shrieked at me. The raise in pay at my new job (and health insurance coverage super low) determined that was a lie 😌
A lot of times they give you the title 'manager' as a way to not pay overtime regardless of your actual job duties. That doesn't sound like the case here but it's a loophole thats been getting abused recently by many employers.
She lives her life repeating the same bad habits over and over. The "I don't live alone," is code for "I'm shacking up with another dude just like I did twice before which produced two kids." Her job is her security blanket which she can't imagine letting go. She feels bad about inconveniencing the two fathers about child support. She could be bringing in at least another $1,000 in child support. She think Caleb can wave a magic wand and a plan will appear to make the debt go away.
Yup. You have Pity, but it goes away fast when you take into account her aversion to good decisions. Wouldn’t be shocked to see her pregnant by a deadbeat again in the near future
She makes me sad. She refuses to help herself or her kids. No child support. No better job. She’s a drowning person actively refusing life rafts Her situation will worsen unless she changes. And it’s not just about spending less. As Caleb proved, it’s about earning more.
This budget with $26 left over doesn't even account for her Sam's membership, annual car registration, birthday or Christmas gifts, even a dollar from the tooth fairy, school supplies or field trips. It isn't sustainable. ☹️
From personal experience, Chewy can definitely be cheaper on certain items. I have shopped at numerous local pet stores both major chains and small business and since most companies have shyed away from good loyalty programs, the delivery service through Chewy ends up being cheaper at best, no more expensive at worst and it's delivered to my home which saves fuel and time.
This is the correct take. I too shopped around and it was comparable to walmart prices for food / litter. And walmart is always out of stock on the stuff we normally get. But with chewy I can get a 22lb bag of food delivered monthly alongside a pail of litter, then change it up to 3 pails of litter that all gets shipped for free. That alone is worth it in gas/time to not have to source locally. Funnily enough @CalebHammer mentioned petsmart as the comparison company.... Petsmart owns Chewy heh.
Chewy absolutely is a good method. I hope he notices the comments about it in case he has future audits that bring up Chewy. If anything, anyone with a pet should know about Chewy.
She's in survival mode and probably can't picture herself on the other side of struggle especially if that's all she's known her entire life. Having a child at 16 especially if no one teaches you how to be a mom is tough. Girl, just know that you and your children deserve everything that you wish for and more. It's your God given right and I wish you the best!
The best thing Caleb has said this episode in reference to child support - "He put it in you Soo he owes. Stick it in, Pay up." "The court is calling… Oh, and wrap it up next time" 😂😂
As a therapist, it is interesting to watch these episodes. (Not diagnosing or giving advice or anything). Caleb, it seems like she did benefit from the interview. Even if it highlights her inner conflicts, that helps her to have more awareness. It may still take a long time and I really really hope she might see a therapist to help with taking in information from others and explore where the defenses are coming from. There may be trauma or other issues even if it is not obvious.
@@fc7307 she could go through insurance or she could use some platform like Open Path Collective, which is a therapist directory for those offering low fee cash pay sliding scale. There may be additional low fee or free options in her area.
@@baconoftheark Possibly but I can’t know or make guesses without actually sitting with someone and understanding more of their story and how they present. I am a psychodynamic therapist though, which means I focus on the psychological roots of emotional suffering, looking at the connection of the past (which is often in childhood) and their current experiences. So I generally have a perspective that most present symptoms arise from dysfunctional family dynamics growing up, abuse (emotional, verbal or physical). There can always be a single traumatic incident or multiple traumatic incidents that impact present symptoms as well. Hope this helps!
Stitch Fix for your kids is absolutely ridiculous. Growing up all we wore were hand me downs and thrifted clothing b/c my parents couldn't afford brand new clothes every year. I loved the thrift store as a kid. You can buy the whole damn Goodwill store with $166 my god. ESPECIALLY living in Texas, I grew up in California.
It amazes me how much mental health plays off with the financial decision and situations people are into. It’s amazing how 90% of the time, it’s mental health issues the ones managing their finances. Sad.
The “I never thought having money was important” but having 2 kids is absolutely insane. And then also working so much for so little and arguing about getting an EASIER BETTER PAYING job? She’s making this life harder than it needs to be. With all that said I hope this experience was eye opening for her and she can build for something better. It’s easy to comment and not easy to go on the show and have your financial flaws displayed.
Miss wasn't triggered. She had issues with ACCEPTING the truth. She had an explanation for everything, and that tells me all I need to know about where she thinks she is.
I remember learning what divorce was when I was young. I was about 10 and I remember it being really sad hearing what some kids had to go through. I sat there and thanked God my parents were happily together and would never do that. Month later my mom files for divorce and kicks my dad out and spends the rest of his life trying to fuck him over in any way legally possible. Knowing both sides so clearly, I'm very genuinely happy that your parents are together.
@tymondabrowski12 a great point, it's simply far better odds to have 2 parents in the home to get to those goals. Even to stray into politics momentarily, a husband and wife is the best indicator. Seeing how men and women interact with each other shows any gender child what healthy habits and relationships between adults look like. Siblings are also very helpful in socializing children and adapting to stressful or unhappy circumstances. I don't want to push religion or politics, but the nuclear family is traditional because it works in the long run.
I was told by investors that a landlords favorite tenant is a single mother because they will never leave, never make a maintenance complaint, and won't complain about any gradual rent increases. Her statement about not wanting to quit her job because she's a single mother is just backing up how people can take advantage of people petrified of change
Clearly you haven't met that many single moms. They come in all varieties. Some are the worst tenants out there. Use their kids as an excuse to trash the place, be late on rent, etc etc
@@cheesecurd100sI’m sure there’s a target demographic. Because I’ve also seen both kinds; women who are so terrified because they’re not under anyone’s protection (and I’m dead serious, women generally love men that make them feel safe and comfortable) would often prefer to completely avoid risk and uncertainty, especially as the ones solely responsible for their children. Then there’s ones who completely embrace degeneracy, probably thanks to being messed in the head.
Watching these videos reminds me of how privileged I am to have grown up with college educated parents who didn’t tolerate me not going to school or getting someone pregnant. This situation has always been my biggest fear, getting paid a terrible wage, taking care of 2 kids alone, and suffocating in debt. I hope she starts taking the steps to boost her income, hold her baby daddies accountable and stop the unnecessary spending.
It's not a privilege, no one will take your parents away and give you poor ones. You are lucky to be born into a family who knows the value of an education and making smart money moves. Be grateful to your parents and follow their example.
For what it's worth, not going to college isn't an inherently bad thing as long as you're still being productive, building a valuable skill, and are money-conscious. Certainly nowhere near as bad as getting someone pregnant lol
@@goulash31 absolutely, I chose to go the college route, but others things like trades or certifications are perfectly valid too. At least do something that has the potential for growth and development. Being stagnant/complacent is my biggest fear
@@JP-ji6of This. People don't realize you either a college person or not. If you aint, then figure out what trade is for you. I got into machine operating, now ima setup operator for a completely different "field" than I was in before. N I got a $3 raise when I swapped jobs lol. I feel for this lady tho 7 years at a company n only making 16.50. New hires are making the same as her I'd be willing to bet.
She definitely has some sentimental attachment to her job. Maybe the best thing for her to do is ask for a raise. That's a real good way to find out if your boss value's your loyalty. If she's a good employee who they want to keep they'll find a way to pay her better.
Sadly, people are blinded by loyalty because of the "security" instead of taking a risk to better their career and their life. I can feel Caleb's urge to yell sooo much but to make the conversation going, patience is needed. It's hard to hold yourself back in that situation I imagine. Another great episode! Keep up the excellent content my man!
It's not about loyalty, it's about self doubt and (like you said) security. Both my parents have been working at pretty much minimum wage for their entire lives. At a certain point, people start believing that it's all they are worth and find it impossible to make the jump and get a better paying job. They're already working their butts off for minimum wage and believe they cannot do 2x more to get a job paying 2x more. Or that they are not intelligent enough or what ever other insecurity. And the more you wait, the harder it is mentally to make the jump and change job and the harder it is to land a job (because the older you are, the less interested the interviewers will be). It's tough, watching people not value their time and themselves properly.
Edit: Also, lady in the interview, if you would like a referral to try to get a job at my company feel free to reach out. I do physician recruitment. There are tons of support roles in the company that you could apply for. My company allows you to work remote, you essentially make your schedule (within reason but it’s pretty flexible), I think now starts at $52,000 all the benefits she wants, I’ve never heard of someone not being able to take off at the drop of the hat to take care of personal issues. I don’t even think it’s that unique of a company. Either ask for more money or get a new job.
$16.50/hr as a manager in this economy is unacceptable. She can make at least $5 more working as a manger at McDonald’s in some places. And with that kind of loyalty to a company on her resume, people would be more than willing to hire her in a manager position without her even having to work up to it. She needs to value herself more and she needs to not be so sensitive to the passion he’s showing by yelling about her debt. She should be that passionate about her own situation.
Being at a company for SEVEN YEARS and them only paying you $16.50 an hour is highway robbery. This is coming from a Canadian perspective where the min wage is higher, but still $16.50 is low for that long of a commitment
I was in a similar situation. Was comfortable at a construction company I worked at out of high school for almost 9 years. Started out at $10/hr in 2011 and up to $21/hr by 2020. Thank God the pandemic happened, cause I learned to respect my value, left the company and started a new job making $22 and within three years am now at $29 with as little or as much overtime as I want. KNOW YOUR WORTH AND GET THE MONEY YOU DESERVE!!!
Daisy, you are good enough. It takes no time to submit an online form for child support, and it takes the same amount of time to apply for jobs on indeed. You are enough. I’m saying this because I needed someone to tell me the same thing YEARS ago. once you discover your worth, you will be unstoppable. I’m curious to see how the follow up episode goes.
She was so frustrating to watch because this is voluntary. She signed up for help, pushed back and when he got rightly frustrated, she went to tears. This was her needing help.
It’s not easy to take this type of confrontation. Yes his guests know what to expect but you see it in all their faces, they’re hurt and in a vulnerable state. Her behaviour was normal lol. Not saying Caleb is wrong btw
I’m sending positive vibes that she learns her worth. You deserve a better paying job & child support. Since she can bring her kids to work is a huge reason she doesn’t want to quit. I hope she has a good support structure family & friends 😊❤
Only been watching for a couple weeks, but this has gotta be my favorite thing on UA-cam atm. Both extremely educational and entertaining at the same time. S/o to you
I really appreciate the way Caleb handled this. He always balances kindness and understanding with the kind of "tough love" people need to understand the gravity of their situations.
I can't believe a single mother would not go for child support. It does t matter what YOU feel or "confrontation". Your kids are your priority and not having income support that is THEIR legal right is deplorable. YOUR feelings do not matter!
I knew a woman like this working in nonprofit (which doesn’t pay well). When she found out she was pregnant, her on & off again boyfriend asked her to get an abortion, saying he was done being a father, having already raised his kids from a previous marriage, and she almost did. (He also ghosted her). She was nearly 40, had always wanted to marry and have a family, and when they explained that she wouldn’t likely have another chance at a child, especially with endometriosis & another health problem, she decided not to have an abortion. So she claimed that it was her sole responsibility since she knew he didn’t want the baby and she blamed herself for the birth control f up (a lapse when switching BC due to a chronic disease she was also treating). She didn’t seek child support. She moved back closer to family supports, (her elderly mother) and I asked her if she honestly believed women owe men an abortion if he asks her to scrape a baby out of her body, or if men are entitled to accountability-free procreation. I mean, he knows how to use a condom, and he also knows that blowing his load in a woman makes a life… why was he entitled to consequence free reproduction? She said she didn’t want him to think that she wanted to use him & didn’t want to upset him in case one day he wanted to meet his daughter. Her daughter was nearly 4 and he hadn’t wanted to know anything about her… I got the impression that she was very lonely, and wanted to love someone & be loved in return. Made me mad as hell, because it was a situation where he never wanted kids, she always did, they both knew that from the start. She wanted marriage one day, he played along as if he might want to marry again one day, so to me it was obvious that he was using her desperation to sponge up the love she gave while stringing her along, when both shouldn’t have been messing with each other the moment they learned they differed on wanting children. He was just as responsible for making a baby as she was. But she really believed that women who refuse to get an abortion are “forcing” men into fatherhood. She was black, kind and dignified, and I got the impression that she was fighting stereotypes that black men make of single mothers & child support, because she would say “I’m not like this kind of woman, or that kind of woman” in regards to misogynistic tropes about gold diggers, “baby mamas”, & welfare moms. I said “F all that, at the end of the day, it’s about what’s best for a little girl not you”. She said “men who feel forced into fatherhood will just work under the table, & they resent their kids”. I said “you don’t control that, I know men who married, planned their kids, then divorced because they ran up credit card debt, then worked under the table to avoid child support so they could continue being irresponsible” But I couldn’t talk sense into her, because she was still holding out hope that if she didn’t upset her daughter’s father, that she would be giving her daughter the opportunity to meet him one day.
I work at a very similar job that she does (from the sound of it), and GMs make salary + commissions, so an average pay is 80-100k. Operation/Assistant managers make 45-70k, but you could make much more. I wonder if she is just taking on some responsibilities without actually being given that title/pay.
She came here to be shouted at but nothing more. It was like a confessional. She wasn't actually prepared to go further than she had already decided to go prior to the conversation.
Caleb, you're the voice of reason that she needed to hear. You handled this well, and I agree with you that having a pet when you're drowning in debt is irresponsible. I hope she gets the help she needs ❤❤
What's really scary is the two kids will grow thinking this is how to live. They'll end up in six figure debt living paycheck to paycheck if she continues on this path. I really hope for her and their sake she takes this as a wake up call.
I think living paycheck to paycheck on a low level job will disqualify you from getting lines of credit or loans big enough to land you in such a debt in the first place.
@@PrimericanIdol not student loans... I aged out of foster care, worked in fast food and they would have given me over 100k for a film degree when I was 18... thankfully I didn't take it, not because I was financially responsible but because I didn't want to move away from my fiancé. Maybe they won't take the bait either but it won't be because of financial knowledge either.
Not necessarily. My parents were maybe 10k in debt by the time I noticed. I never knew the cards they were using were credit cards versus debit ones. Still, I was a kid and didn't really understand nor care because I was being fed and taken care of. I ended up having completely different habits than my parents, not because they taught me or because of their own habits, I just took in the lessons as they came with experience.
It’s always interesting to me when people say their grocery spend will be lower than suggested at the budget phase, when they are not factoring in they have been spending like $1000 on take out and restaurants. Of course your grocery bill will increase if you cut out the fast food.
Im 28 too, this hit me hard lol, I’m applying for better jobs . I was doing this before, watching this episode. I’m not in debt, and thank god I live with my parents. I don’t have alot money responsibilities, but i been careless with my money. I could save alot more. So thanks caleb. Also, I live in New York. Even, getting a better paying job, that I can afford to get an apartment. I rather pay rent to my parents, than a land lord, rent with roommates that can be messy . But I know, when I get married. This will change!! But yeah . I use to feel bad living with my parents . Also, I got an phone job interview. Hoping it goes well, if not I’ll not give up .
Sadly, probably due to low self-esteem, her aversion to conflict, or feeling easily overwhelmed, she’s clearly paralysed by a fear of change. She’s been in this job for years, she’s familiar with the work, the culture, she probably has colleagues that she considers friends, maybe a boss who’s understanding about her kids… the concept of moving to a new workplace where she doesn’t know anyone is probably terrifying. That unfortunately means she isn’t willing to find out how much better life could be were she to leave and find a new job. Better hours, better work environment, and especially better pay, because even if her company are nice to her, they are 100% taking advantage of her with that low a salary after all the time she’s given them. I hope she finds enough courage to take that leap, if not for herself then at least for her kids.
She seems like a really sweet girl who was told she wasn’t worth shit growing up, and never left that headspace (even after reaching her 20s and having kids). I hope that she is able to recognize her own inherent worth one day. ❤
@@austinjacobsen7689 It is rough. I am not making a declaration about her background or mental health, but sadly there is a positive relationship between early childhood abuse/neglect and teenage pregnancy. In the US, it has even been recommended that teen moms be screened for trauma symptoms during pre-natal appointments (even if the child was conceived during consensual sex).
@Henny’s Auto Detailing He did, but she claimed "there's no trauma" and she just "doesn't like yelling." Personally, I press X to doubt too. I think she badly needs mental health support.
I notice a lot of people vastly overestimate how much work they can do. The whole idea of "If I do overtime every day I don't have to change anything" shows up with a lot of the people on this channel.
Had a coworker with that attitude. She wanted to work 50 hours a week. She burnt out after a couple months. I know some blue collar folks are going to rip on how 50 hours is a part time job, but it's a lot of hours for people who aren't used to it. It's also usually eating up an extra day of your week and you end up with only 1 day off. It's tough to do long term if you don't come from a field where that's required.
She doesn't even recognize that forcing her kids to come to work with her to save on childcare is extremely detrimental to them. Imagine spending your childhood at Mommy's work :(
I used to go to a mom and pop Chinese buffet like almost everyday for lunch. Fam biz. The lady had her 2 children there either helping out or doing their homework. Felt bad for the kids.
@@BlazinTigger Kids aren't supposed to be at their parents' work all day. How can she even responsibly watch them while she's working and being a manager? I doubt her employer appreciates it, if they even know about it. It's incredibly unprofessional and also a legal liability. Maybe if she actually started behaving like an adult and sought the child support her kids deserve and are entitled to, she could afford appropriate childcare.
Dude she's been with the company for 7 years and only making 16.50?! Bro how do people accept shit pay after being loyal to a place for soo long??
Lazy people too
They told her she's a store manager and then proceeded to give her none of the pay or responsibilities lol
They gave her an assistant regional manager position! (Assistant to the regional manager)
@@amyeastman8764 ha thank you for being on the same wavelength as me.
Complacency
You should add a “total debt” counter in a corner of the screen as you go through. And as you get into the debt, the counter goes up. Would be a nice visual and a add more weight to see a number climbing and climbing throughout the interview
lmao with a cash register ring every time it goes up
@@Dre2Dee2 yes! Exactly lol
I love this s idea!!!!
I can only imagine the amount of work this would require, but yes!! I’d love the added visual.
@@lilymohsye it wouldn’t be much. It’s simple math which he’s doing by hand anyway during the interview. All that’s needed to add in editing is a graphic and I actually see he’s doing it now in current videos. Just a little update graphic for total debt so far
She said she’s not good with confrontation which I’m sure is why she isn’t quitting her job (confrontation) or demanding that her kids father pay child support (confrontation). She needs to go through the short term pain of confrontation and struggle for the long term benefits. At least do it for your kids man. Hard to watch.
She almost certainly picked scumbag fathers.
That's why get a lawyer....let them do the confrontation.
@@ApplePotato Lawyer cost money that she doesn't have. She'll need to do it herself (Confrontation) Sadly, most likely she wont do anything about it.
Would it make sense to not go after the father for child support if he didn't have any money to begin with?
@@F34RI355 Google the term, "Wage garnishment", now you know. It doesn't matter if the father has money or not.
The problem is she refuses to get out her comfort zone and it’s ruining her. Everyone hates being uncomfy but you have to if you want improvement
The hard way is the easy way.
The easy way is the hard way.
This. And boy can most everyone relate.
There is a limit. Yes she needs a better job.
But signing up for a job at a toxic company that throws her to the wolves is going to break her emotionally, and she will spend more. Unhappy people tend to spend more.
Obviously there’s an adjustment period to every job, and it’s uncomfortable. But there is a line between throwing yourself into a blender vs. adjusting to a new job
When you have kids you can’t afford this is the consequence
Well she did get out of her pants very quickly
The child support is her kid's money. She owes it to them to go after it.
Weaponizing child support through the government…🙄
100%. She’s allowing her children to go without, because she won’t demand child support. That money isn’t hers just to play with, it’s hers to use to creating a good, safe, healthy life for those babies.
It’s more to the story. As much as she pushing back and everything else she most likely not telling the truth on the situation with her kids. Sounds like her mom take care of the kids not her
The child support is a must.
I never went for child support for my 4 kids and reading what you commented just made me rethink my stance on it. I could just put it into a savings account for them.
I want to know who has gaslit her into thinking she’ll never get job flexibility in regards to childcare at another job.
YES her workplace seems toxic af and has gaslit her into staying like there won’t be anywhere better. She has a lot of magical thinking in regards to her finances. She is not living in reality.
Yeah, most work from home jobs pay more that 16.50 even. 280 a month in gas is absurd.
@@swelldritch2774 sure. She's a glorified cashier in her own words. Hard to do that from home. She's probably very good at her retail, in person job. She needs to take Caleb's advice and get some skills/experience to change careers
Not in $16/hr corporate retail.
If she finds another small, compassionate employer she'll be good. Those are dwindling.
Caleb's advice to expand her experience and education to give her more career options will give her more flexibility.
@@swelldritch2774 it is not generally accepted that someone work from home and not have someone watching their kids
So…
99% of her income goes to needs….
With $26 to spare; owes $31,000 in bad debt, and has two kids of different fathers.
She doesn’t take the kids’ fathers to court to receive child support, and has spent 7 years working for a company that STILL pays her $16.50 an hour!!! AND, the job is so distant from her home, she pays $70 a week in gas (not counting oil changes). Incredible.
She COULD get out of this situation but she is complacent where she is 😢
Girl, we are all contributing to her. Recognize when someone is on welfare she doesn’t have to be receiving cash, but she’s receiving everything else. She lives too high off the hog.
This nailed it. This is an incredibly easy situation to get out of. She could literally get a job anywhere in less than 2 weeks paying more. She would get 2 child support payments every month with a couple court filings. There must be more to the story
@@jckclt right- she was holding back a bit- I wonder what else is going on 😞
This is so sad. She needs to get a grip because her girls are not going to be able to go to college without taking out massive debt. She needs to make a change and stop expecting a different result from doing the same damn thing
well when you put it like that, good grief...
I cannot believe I sat through 45 min just to finally hear that she basically breaks her back just because she doesn’t want to notify someone that she needs time off.
@@cowmath77 I said I can’t believe I sat through that
I love that you listened to her when she asked you to stop yelling. You took the feedback on the spot and adjusted automatically. Amazing behavior and showing that you are truly here to help your listeners and those you have on the show.
Thank you ❤
Shut up
Well said. But it was horrible to see how emotionally weak she was.
@@hi86065 who cares. Maybe she got some past trauma we don't know about.
I honestly think more people should confront him about his yelling. It is not necessary and there are better ways to confront people about their debt.
i would love to see you do an audit of someone who is not absolutely shitting the bed financially. or maybe even someone who is doing a great job. some 7/10 or 10/10 audits would be cool to see
I'm actually pretty interested in going on the show , I am kinda half way with my finances, I live and breathe my budget, but I have a couple bad debts Im digging out
He has done plenty of those types of videos too just watch all his videos
I volunteer
Who would need an audit with 7/10+ finances?
@@bryanrodarte5205 people who want to do even better?
This lady is a good representation of at least 30% of Americans who willingly give big corporations their money through the form of interest.
"but my LIZARDS neeeeeed it!"
Yuuup, thats why theyre broke
Interest and fees. So many people make credit card companies rich giving them free money
Isent Credit Cards Compagnies allowed to blossom, and MAKE $€£ 👀
Ore is everything WRONG, and ready to BLOW up ✊🏻
@@meanmugging yeah credit cards make millions out interest and fees!
@@joseperez2003 is it only millions 🤔
She could literally walk in to any McDonalds in Austin and earn 16.50 an hour. Unreal she has been with her company for 7 years.
And yet, if she leaves, or gets fired, her job will close her file and she will be replaced by the time she walks out the door! $16.50 for 7 years? Jeeezzzzz
@@thomasjohnson8517lol she’d be replaced by someone getting paid $20 an hour at least too
Spending 50$/week on groceries with 2 kids is the biggest lie she says by far
She must be eating ramen noodles
They're eating out everyday
More like 50 a day
I'd probably spend almost 50 a week on myself eating only my main meal prep that's rice, beans, rotel, and chicken.
Not when you make enough food to have leftovers that can last 2-3 days. If she meal plans throughout the week she can meet it or at least come close. She also needs to seek out food pantries to offset her food cost.
I can’t imagine raising two kids at her age working that much for so little. I hope she finds something better that supports her and her kids.
She’ll probably trick some man into paying her AND her 2 kids(by TWO DIFFERENT MEN) way through life. Same as every other single mom. Or, her kids will end up in jail doing illegal things to make money to support their own mother.
Like a sugar daddy
She’ll be exceptionally lucky to find a step-dad
Sounds like she gets help from her Parents. I know my Mom got a lot of help from relatives and friends when I was little, not financially per se, but a lot of picking up from school and baby sitting and having lunches or dinners et cetera.
He forgot the part where she had the younger kid at 19. So wow she had not one but TWO children as a teenager
It was sad to see her clearly trapped in fear and false job security. The moment you told her " there is no security this job could fire you" I hope it clicked for her thay she has to be open to positive changes.
Impressive video. I started a bit late (graduated from my doctorate program at age 30 in 2014 with 170k in school loan debt). Managed to pay off my debt by 2019 and currently have a house and 250k total in investments (combo of profit share, 401k and a brokerage account). I'm not very knowledgeable in investing, so I just have my investing currently in index funds mainly Too but have been putting a lot into Schd the past few months. I don’t know if that's the optimal strategy, but psychologically it is very set it and forget it, and prevents me from obsessing over individual stock performance.
I’m thinking of doing the same but not sure if I should use different brokerage accounts? Just curious. Pros and cons?
I advise you work with an advisor because i have personally worked with an investment advisor to diversify my $200k portfolio across multiple markets, resulting in over $580k in net profit from high dividend yielding stocks. With the right guidance, you can also make informed investment decisions and achieve your financial goals.
@@james.atkins88 Please tell me how can I connect to your advisor. My funds are being murdered by inflation, therefore I'm looking for a more profitable investing strategy to put them to work.
It's best you do your due diligence, I have my portfolio overseen by ‘Julia Ann Finnicum’ and her qualifications speak for itself. Most likely, the internet is where to find basic info, she has a noticeable page for consulting.
@@james.atkins88 Thanks for sharing, I did my own little research, and your advisor looks advanced and experienced. I wrote her and I scheduled a phone call. She seems experienced, I hope she doesn't ignore me.
This lady doesn't seem to value herself. That's why she isn't willing to demand child support or demand higher pay. Girl, you were brave to come on the show and you were smart enough to see that you have an issue and to start trying to fix it. You are better than you think you are and I have high hopes for you. At the least, seek some child support. The extra money will decrease your burden and you will be more emotionally available to your kids.
My guess is she is conflict avoidant based on the observation that 1) doesn't want to demand child support (she hinted that she didn't want to ask that of the guy...it wouldn't be worth it), 2) getting a new job (would require her to have that conversation of quitting), 3) dealing with her parents
If you took a percentage of women getting child support I’ll bet it is less than 20% of the population. So much for women ripping off men…..
@@TuBui2 she also got triggered when Caleb raised his voice at her. Definitely unresolved trauma/ not developmentally sound for a 28 yr old adult. She’s super conflict avoidant.
She seems abused and desperate, but overwhelmed. Covering your eyes to it is a coping mechanism
shes is not brave, she's a failure
And the father of her children is broke and has no money. She wouldnt get anything anyway. Hes already in jail, what are you going to do to him
This girl cannot handle any level of confrontation--she just crumbles. Explains why she would rather struggle than seek child support. Girl, you are a single mom raising 2 boys and working 60 hours per week. You have earned your space in this world, and you deserve respect. Own it!
The only thing I wish Caleb would have pushed back harder on were all the pets, but I know that's a touchy subject. She mentioned dogs plural, a cat and a lizard. Sooo much money that she just can't afford right now.
I would feel a lot better about the pets if she didnt love them more than her own kids
My LIZARDS need this, my LIZARDS need that! ANYTHING for the lizards!
Kids: *crickets*
Maybe she should have thought better before she spread her legs or at least stay with the father for children.
@@Dre2Dee2literally wouldn’t have even know she was a mom if Caleb didn’t ask…
She can find friends who are willing to take her dogs, cat and lizard in. It is hard to give them up but she really cannot afford them.
She didn't do shit but burden herself and everyone around her
Caleb I appreciate you asking if she was okay after yelling. And then not arguing with her when she said it didn’t help. You’re passionate, but never overly combative, and it really goes to show that you care about these peoples’ situations. Great vid as always!
@@indytaker869 You must be fun at parties
@@indytaker869 My guy, just go through the comments and read about how many people are turning their life around just from watching this video. If you really believe this is true, then everything in life is exploitation, and nothing you can do to help someone will ever do them any good. Do you understand how stupid that is?
@@indytaker869 tell me what financial advisor gives their clients money. Especially clients who demonstrate they’re not financially literate yet
@@indytaker869 But yet people volunteer to go on his channel. These videos could/can actually be helping viewers. It's not always solely for entertainment purposes.
@@indytaker869 These people aren't forced on here and of course it's entertainment but he also giving good financial advice to these people, plus a lot other shows wouldn't even ask if someone's okay.
When she tried to justify her having the pets as them being rescues - that’s even worse. You shouldn’t be ‘rescuing’ without an ample ability to care for them (without going into credit card debt). It’s irresponsible. I get that sometimes major things happen with our pets and in that case there is insurance, or sometimes debt companies that specifically cater to emergency vet care - but daily expenses should never go on credit because that means you can’t afford them.
Rescue is even worse, their health is unpredictable
It’s all just part of an overarching theme of entitlement. She wants what she can’t have and she’ll be damned if she can’t get it
She goes into overwhelm very quickly. Her life sounds very stressful. What she's not hearing is Caleb telling her she's already WORKING MORE THAN SHE SHOULD HAVE TO to survive. She's not hearing that he's rooting for her.
that's what happens when you have 2 kids out of wedlock at such a young age.
@@bloodCount8895 No, that's what happens when you don't have a support system or family that can financially support her to finish her own goals to provide a better life. Too many comments here about how it's her fault because she had children. Unlike some of the other women I've seen on this channel, white influencer chicks that obviously come from privilege, she is obviously not. There is more to her story than having unprotected sex at least two times.
@@Eleanor.Moseman 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 You are absolutely correct. There is more to the story here and it will explain why she has such low self-esteem. Some people literally believe they deserve to be abused and do not seek better treatment or living conditions. It’s heartbreaking but she needs more therapy/coaching to even learn how to look up and set higher goals.
@@Eleanor.Moseman it is her fault (and the deadbeat dad’s fault), because she had children
@@elizabethstewart6224 Absolutely. My heart goes out to this episode. I am going to guess Caleb spends a lot more time with her off camera.
52 hr work weeks and a side job :/ girl puts in work. I think your company is absolutely abusing you for 16.50 after 7 years
Yeah she could make way more with better hours doing CNA work or phlebotomist work. Or she could be an actual shift manager for any fast food company and make more too. Store managers in fast/fast casual make good money too but the hours can really suck. She has too much going on in her personal life to be wasting her time making so little.
Why? Many people stay on the same hourly for years and don’t get more.
It is up to the person to look for opportunities for better pay or a better job.
Opportunities are not entitled or just land in your lap with no effort.
@Anarchodandyist idk around here 17 an hr is starting for fast food. Not someone who is 1 of 2 working 6 days a week for years.
Target starts at $19 an hour, even Rebounderz. I would be angry with my workplace if I was only getting $16.50 after 7 years.
@@vchafab you should only be angry with yourself in that scenario. Some jobs don't care about their employees loyalty. It's a 16.50 an hour position.
Caleb spends all this time making us content. The least we could do is get him on Island of Love or something. Find him the right soul mate that he can financial audit.
Soul mates are expensive.
@@insanity4082 they sure are. That's why I need that financial audit to happen. 😂
Love is blind would be better lol
Your a dude? Wtf? Girls are not a good financial decision.
"You financed the wedding?!"
She’s overwhelmed; I pray she finds balance, a good accommodating job, and financial peace.
Her saying I’m triggered made me wish the worst upon her, sorry not sorry
Nah she has the upmost victim mentality
She doesn't realize that she has more to gain and less to lose by finding a new job. I hope she builds the courage to find something better.
This story reminds me of my mom, she worked for the same employer for so long that she felt like she couldn’t find another job, and they knew that too! She hardly got any raises for her entire career even though she was a hard worker and even got job offers from other people she never took them because she was afraid of learning a new job. ❤Daisy - you have to believe you can find a new job and can prove yourself there. If this job appreciated you they would pay you a livable wage. My mom is retired now but totally regrets not moving on, she realizes how much income she lost out on. It is scary but you can learn and adapt. ❤
👌
Exactly this, I hope she gets some confidence to move on to better things. Or request a raise at her current employment in the meantime.
Hopefully she does find another job. My mother is not able to nor do I think she is allowed too.
@@mmp495 Yeah, it's a damn shame... But do you think the "Child Support" would have actually went to you? That's the problem, extra money doesn't mean we are children would have been helped any differently.
she's fixed in this mindset of not upsetting anybody, not confronting, making others' lives easy and constantly going against her own interests in the process. 2 kids but she won't even consider asking for child support, a job that doesn't pay enough but she won't leave, she's lending money she knows it's not coming back, it is maddening how many women in this world are raised to be like this and therefore be taken advantage of. Sending her a big hug and the best vibes, she deserves way more than this. She's a fighter and she'll get to a better place in the way only single moms know how to do it, hopefully she'll eventually invest in mental health resources to correct some of her patterns
I agree!
Exactly!
Soooo true. Her habits and patterns are not serving her. They may serve everyone around her, but not her.
Now just imagine how men feel? Women make 80% of the consumer purchase discussions despite claiming they male less.
She not a fighter currently, in fact she’s a pushover. She’ll need to become a fighter to get out of her situation.
Folk are forgetting she started out with 0 financial knowledge + was a mother since basically childhood. She’s in survival mode and has to have a wall up to keep from being anxious about everything. She’s clearly starting to try and learn because only in the past year she learned stuff from TikTok and probably inspired her to apply to get audited by Caleb. She’s going to come to terms with changing her job on her own- this experience and what she’s exposed to online is helping seed the ideas and courage to change her situation and learn how to better budget.
She chose to have 2 kids with two different dudes....
Let’s hope so
@@atodaso1668 LMAO
@@atodaso1668 yep zero sympathy lmao
@@user-ej2lj4rz3u s1mp
She strikes me as an overworked, exhausted single mom that is a bit simple, trusting, and naive, and has been taken advantage of by tons of terrible people. I hope things get better for her soon.
Having a baby when you're a child can arrest emotionally and mental development. Not always, but it seems that in her case it happened.
shouldnt have had kids
@@bunaynayslay really? Most people don't plan on having children but something slips. That's like saying say no to drugs works. She was 16 and none of us hasn't made bad decisions that young.
@@bunaynayslay she’s obviously trying to be a good mom. She deserves kids more than I could say for a lot of people in this country.
@@tigerwoods373What?? Crazy how people like you will say anything as an excuse to avoiding personal responsibility for your choices.
Classic case of putting others first coupled with conflict avoidance. Kids' needs OK, but their wants, giving over 100% to her employer, not asking her exes for help, rescuing pets, lending $$ to friends, etc. Her natural loyalty and kindness are biting her in the ass. Caleb, I too think she is being taken advantage of...it's a problem lots of ppl suffer from, myself included at times.
other people have brought up the possibility that her employer might be flexible with her hours for her kids or allowing her kids to hang out while she works so she doesn't have to pay for childcare. But everything else, you have a point!
Let me gaslight you beautiful
@@sabias3932 i guarantee she doesnt even take off from her job to take care of her kids that often. how often do kids really get sick? and shes hourly so she isnt being compensated for that time either. she is literally too stupid to survive.
Child support could easily be taking $600-1000 a month off that 98% budget. She needs to go fight in court immediately. Letting herself be way to pushed over my her baby daddies, her job, etc. rooting for you girl- go out there and get fierce. Stop letting yourself being pushed over!
That's assuming the dads have jobs lol
@@imnotawasteoftime it’s not. The government doesn’t care if you have a job, you have a kid. You either figure out how to provide for that child or the IRS comes. They would have to figure it out because that are obligated.
@@marissaboland958 just because the irs comes, doesn't mean that person will magically get a job. If they DO get a job, it's usually just long enough to make a couple payments, and then they quit. Essentially buying time until courts/irs come after them again.
@@imnotawasteoftime so you think she shouldn’t go at all to court and try?
@@marissaboland958 lol I never said or implied that 😂 Obviously she needs to
For her to say she doesn’t have some type of trauma around yelling but says she was triggered is interesting. Sure people don’t like being yelled at but her demeanor absolutely changed and she became extremely flustered when asked if she was ok. The simply asking if someone is ok doesn’t make it better but it helps to know how to proceed. Hopefully she gets a better job so she can get health insurance and get therapy to talk about this.
I think it’s more than just the trauma you described. I have a feeling that something really bad happened to her and that’s why she had two kids when she was still a teenager. I also think whatever happened to her has a lot to do with why she won’t pursue child support, because she doesn’t want to face the father. Poor thing! I hope she gets the therapy she needs to turn her life around.
Daisy is one of the scariest situations you've had on here Caleb because she's one emergency or job loss away from a drop to even more serious debt.
The cylinder in her car could go out and then she and her daughters are homeless
She is like one of his other guests who has an excuse for everything.
And it’s insane that she has $26 leftover without making even one mistake, two kids, and no savings no investments no retirement and she “doesn’t live alone”. She isn’t surviving, she is barely scraping by. I fully understand needing flexibility and the ability to bring her kids to work. There has to be something better than this situation.
@Always, Emilia she can't even afford an oil change at this point, or to take her kid to the doctor if they get sick or hurt, or take her pets to the vet. I bet her $200 grocery budget isn't accounting for all of the eating out she does.
@@TheCoolwhipped I was thinking that, too, about the groceries. Ugh I really hope she figures it out. Maybe she’ll watch the episode and read the comments.
I know we watch this to see Caleb grilling people and losing his shit at stupid decisions, but I appreciate that he's equally as positive if they do something good
I can't believe I didn't think about this before, but Caleb, I would highly recommend directing parents in financial situations like hers to consider applying for the local Head Start program. High quality free childcare for families in vulnerable situations. Serves children 6 weeks through 5 years, and sometimes provides transportation as well. It is offered in all 50 states, and is a federally funded program. I have a BS in early childhood education and in the middle of a MA in Ed Research & Evaluation. My specific career field is Head Start. Every Head Start family also worked with a family advocate who's job is to help the family navigate the situation and work towards financial independence
That’s really cool, thank you for spending time to make that comment, I hope she sees it! Thank you for all you do as well
That's great if it works, but many of those programs end up being ran by people who couldn't care less about anything but money, and either refuses to help, or outright makes peoples' lives worse.
Her kids are above age 9 but this is still fantastic you mentioned all of this! I'd never heard of it before but I also don't have the kids so there's that!
I would hope she is getting government programs. She should qualify. Wish her luck, feel sorry for her. She seems unsure of herself. We don’t know her background.
Head start is child care program? My parent sent my little brother there thinking it was pre school😅.
The fact that she didn’t even know what interest was until she was 28 was mind blowing to me
I don't think most people understand how bad credit cards are. If they did, 56% of people wouldn't carry a balance.
I hope she digs deep and finds the courage to find a new place to work, for her to make 16.50 after 7 years is insane. She deserves much more for her loyalty.
Not if she has 0 skills to contribute. You don't magically deserve more money for longevity
You should never have loyalty to an employer because they won't be loyal to you.
She’s not being loyal, she’s just being lazy, unambiguous, and passive. She’s working cheap retail, they don’t need anybody special, they just need anybody to sit there for the low wage.
I guarantee in those 7 years, even with whatever raises they've given her (if any) she's probably making less now than when she started due to inflation. Probably takes a pay cut every single year with the reduced buying power.
I dont understand how he never even suggested asking for a raise?
It's sad because unlike a lot of people previously on the show she's willing to work hard. Her mentality and situation is keeping her down relative to the work she's putting in. Hope she figures it out.
Yeah that's what makes it heartbreaking, she seems hard working but wedded to a job that pays her dirt.
She's too nice for her own good. Giving people money and not taking the dads to court is literally ruining her.
@@andrew8168nice or borderline stupid?
Right because cashiering really takes it outta her.
Also getting pregnant out of wedlock twice by two different daddies... No college degree... Excuses galore... Horrible spending habits... This woman is extremely irresponsible
I'm a single mom as well with zero help. It took me busting my butt working three jobs and driving myself into the ground to make ends meet to come to the realization I need ONE really good job., and found it. I've been here for almost five years and they know my child comes before a job. There are great employers out there and are family orientated, it's become more common. I REALLY hope she finds a better job.
Same question for the guest as with you: why are you not getting child support? It’s your child’s right to that money. By not getting it, you are letting someone rob your baby every month. Every month. If the sperm source is a loser then so be it, but at least put that in as a legal obligation.
I don’t think she realizes that she’s reliant on those credit cards to get her by every month. If she stops using them, she’s screwed. If she continues to use them, she’s screwed. She’s trapped herself and she is avoiding the reality of it.
Caleb has some great emotional intelligence. He listens to his guests very well and seems to always ensure that he is not being harder on them than they can handle. You see it in a lot of his videos but the moment at 23:13 showed it off very well too. He immediately diffused the situation to show his intentions are meant to highlight the importance of the situation. When his consoling was not received well, he swiftly got the interview back on the focus while bringing his attitude down while not changing his manner of tackling the topic. These videos are great to listen to just to hear these genuine interactions between people in vulnerable situations and an unbiased aid. Keep up the amazing videos Caleb! Don't forget to take time for yourself too!
Very true, she was so insufferable it is impressive how he remained calm.
@@michael_harren it happens a bit later. He is noticing something in her and his whole vibe changes. A lot of guests need the hard first fee minutes…
Yes! And I think she needs therapy. There is obviously some underlying issue, the security, the sadness/anger and picking up the rescue pets. I hope she gets better with herself and her money
@@michael_harren It's all true. You people are such nancies. Volunteers come on and he goes about helping them in a way that is entertaining. Why wouldn't he record it and profit? He's giving them a free service that *they asked for*
That part made me cringe. She needs to grow up.
Love how you handled her not responding well to your yelling. Really showed your empathy here again. And THAT is why we love you big guy #scrunchgang
It’s good character on Caleb’s part but I was getting irritated she doesn’t understand the urgency of what her financial situation looks like
@@Ayaymeer Ignorance is bliss and “YES MEN” are dangerous. She probably has never had anyone tell her she is not doing a good job. It’s a shock to her system.
Caleb is an intensive care bear
#scrunchgang
@@shroomssadow4981i think it's quite the opposite too many people telling her she's no good. Most people are triggered by what they're most exposed to.
You wouldn't think a budget audit could be so dramatic. These are incredibly compelling.
Lol, I watch this show faithfully and whenever he starts going through the checking accounts I get the urge to go through mine and see what I've been spending crazy on. He's like a financial accountability coach.
Literally, I went from having $500 in a savings account with Ally before watching to having $8500 in an account 8 months later since watching bc I'm super aware of my spending.
Thank you Caleb!
That’s incredible!
Holy shit can't relate congratulations 👏
@@CalebHammer Thank you! Seriously. I'm no longer in an abusive relationship with my money or my credit score bc of this series. Please keep going! You have no idea how much this helps people.
So dope !!!
I had 5k in my savings at a point (January 2020) but my job laid a bunch of people off so I had to use the money to take care of myself and I moved from la to Florida because I was 20 and moving because I was contractually obligated to do so (me and my mom did a contract together) and I used the rest of the money to pay for a place to stay at until Igor a job. I had been saving for almost the past 3 years on and off but not for my long term future and only have to more money when I blew off money and to buy things I wanted but then once I started watching Caleb I started saving again and within the past 3 weeks I’ve saved $815 and by the end of the year I’ll have been able to have $7,200
People need to remember: your job does not care about you or your loyalty. You are alwaye replaceable.
Be realistic with yourself.
@Baconofthe Ark both of you guys 💯💯💯
Her self-esteem is horrible if she is willing to tolerate being underpaid and the bum fathers not contributing. So sad to see. She deserves so much better. She's still so young and can turn around these bad decisions.
Don't forget, it's a choice to have kids. She chose to have kids with those guys
@@AnimeBeefRandoms family life is so broken in America lol wtf
@@awarem8739 she should have picked someone better to have kids with.
I don’t think she really wants much better.
@@AnimeBeefRandoms That isn’t the only problem. The men are also to be blamed and shamed for abandoning their kids. Everyone involved is a mess. I just find it amazing that having a complete family is seen as something rare and a miracle in America as someone coming from a culture where everyone is married and has a complete family and situations like hers are almost nonexistent
i honestly sympathize w her so much... she's been a mom since she was a kid and it's clear her intentions are nothing but good. i'm proud of her for coming in here especially since she said she is afraid of confrontation. she's clearly the type of person to always give to others but never take anything for herself. a genuinely good person who's been taken advantage of by everyone from what it seems like... she's trying her best and i really hope things get better for her and her kids. sending love ❤
She can't do the simple task of collecting child support for them thoughhh 🤣
Damn this was a tough one. I just feel so bad for her. Clearly she’s just been in survival mode so long that she can’t see a way to better her situation. I really hope she does well
I hope she’s stops letting her mom have access to her card, one of the reasons being she doesn’t wanna lose cash isn’t a good one either because of course we all lose stuff sometimes and sometimes it’s cash but it’s hard to lose cash when you have a wallet and just value money
Idk if she’s hurting that bad then she shouldn’t be spending all kinds of money on pets. She listed off multiple pets
survving with 20 dollar donut and MLB jereys tho lol
@@iosgaming2824 Idk having her mom have access seems like the smallest problem. Sure it is not ideal but there was a total of $23 spend on it so it doesn't look like her mom is abusing the card in any way.
@@Sadreath yeah but the thing is she just shouldn’t have access to it tbh but your definitely right in comparison to everything else it’s pretty minuscule
Before watching Caleb and a few other finance UA-cam videos I always thought that ending the month with nearly nothing in your bank account was normal. I didn’t realize that I was living paycheck to paycheck nor that I had a lifestyle I couldn’t afford. So glad I am learning and educating myself, looking forward to the future and managing my finances as I continue in college. Thanks Caleb!
Thank you!
Caleb you have helped me pay off $20,000 of debt in less than 6 months and we are on such a better track to being financially free. THANK YOU for these videos.
Damn bro where you work at
@@g0414 well, pretty much anywhere where they make like 60-70k a year. Not to shabby but not mind blowing.
@@rayman3610 what is flex ?
@@reginaldlucky1056Amazon delivery!
@@rayman3610 great job!
I see people like her a lot in my day to day. They fear change, they're scared of losing their income, they don't realize that credit cards are the reason theyre getting by every month, they've chosen to be comfortable in with the job they have when they could make more anywhere else. It's a really hard state of mind to get out of. She came on the show but unfortunately I don't think she's ready to make the changes she needs.
I am in that mindset too and don’t know how to get out of it
She even fears condoms apparently
She can start as a shift supervisor at stsrbucks for $20 (plus tips which can put you at 23-25 an hour depending on the store you are at) and it is also time and a half
Animal behavior major here with a tip Caleb should use on these episodes! Caleb, love what you said about not being able to afford pets isn’t helping them. It’s very true. Something you should tell people though in these situations is to look for LOCAL PET FOOD BANKS. I guarantee you that any local pet bank would give her free food and litter for the dogs and cats until she can get out of this. All they need is proof of income and situation. She can also even get some free vet care or low cost on vaccines etc. but it can be a real lifesaver for people. When I worked at an animal shelter, all we wanted was pets to stay in their homes. We rather give assistance in a trying time with food, litter, and vet care, even toys, then have someone not be able to afford the pet.
Food banks are a bit different to not having money for expensive specialist reptile enclosures though. Reptile enclosures can cost thousands, especially if she has a large lizard. I doubt if she had a bearded dragon or a skink she would need a custom enclosure
@@matthewhiggs4805 oh, absolutely. She shouldn’t have exotic pets in her situation. I have a cat I feed off a food bank because I can’t afford her prescription food. But my two ferrets are 100% on me and I budgeted for them. I agree, there’s no way she is custom building for a gecko etc. depending on the lizard she could try Facebook marketplace for cheap stuff but, I think she may need to consider rehoming him/her. One exotic vet bill can be killer.
I worked at a animal clinic for 4 years, if you can’t afford to take care of the pet properly don’t get it, it’s selfish and irresponsible and she already has 2 little kids she needs to prioritize cause clearly she ain’t doing that
Wow I didn't know that existed!
She needs to get rid of them. Those stupid animals are stealing her kids food
Asking to borrow money from a single mother is despicable and of course she never got it back.
i mean no one knows her situation the way we just saw it in this video. they probably see her blowing it like crazy and thought it was okay to ask to borrow money. the not paying it back is completely fucked up though
Honestly they probably worked out quickly she's timid and won't confront them about it. Not saying it's right but she gives that vibe just in the interview. Easily exploited so someone will.
If you're dumb people are going to take advantage. She needs to learn
I’ve dealt with people like this girl before. She will go home and think a lot about this. The fact that she talked about leaving her pets out of her budget means she’s seeing the patterns but things aren’t clicking yet. I think her 3 month follow up will show some positive momentum.
It really is the most obvious first step. Get rid of any pets. She doesnt feel comfortable moving too quick but this really need to happen asap. Hopefully she has a better understanding of her budget now
@@ronnie5329 That's easy to say, but she has kids, those pets are probably their best friends. That makes it a much more difficult choice to make.
@@marie-andreec5164 Yes, but they are still pets. When you have real kids everything comes second or third. Not sure if its a culture thing, but in Denmark here ppl would tell you to grow up if you put your pets on par with your kids
@@marie-andreec5164 as in, if you have real kids. I get that ppl who live alone get attached to their pets. Makes 100% sense. But keeping pets you cant afford will only hurt your real kids down the line. I cant have that
@@ronnie5329 Real kids? Do you not believe her kids are real?
She’s a manager based on lack of oversight not based on pay or responsibility. Seems like false prestige. Sometimes that makes people happy or boosts their ego so the won’t leave.
Absolutely. My former boss “absorbed” the job of two other managers/directors lateral to her and she thought she was SUCH a big shot because of her title, amount of responsibility and people reporting to her and her minimal raise.
Her raise might have been good but NOT 2-salaries worth of the work she absorbed and the tyrant she became 🙃 she got pissed when I left after a $2 raise (mind you, AFTER the company raised the cost of our health benefits that came out to >$16,000 out of pocket for me, for my family of 4). “BUT I GAVE YOU A FANTASTIC RAISE!”, she shrieked at me. The raise in pay at my new job (and health insurance coverage super low) determined that was a lie 😌
A lot of times they give you the title 'manager' as a way to not pay overtime regardless of your actual job duties. That doesn't sound like the case here but it's a loophole thats been getting abused recently by many employers.
They gave her the title but not the pay .. people love the titles and forget about the pay
@@deepblue812 managers are not automatically exempt. It's not a loophole.
She lives her life repeating the same bad habits over and over. The "I don't live alone," is code for "I'm shacking up with another dude just like I did twice before which produced two kids." Her job is her security blanket which she can't imagine letting go. She feels bad about inconveniencing the two fathers about child support. She could be bringing in at least another $1,000 in child support. She think Caleb can wave a magic wand and a plan will appear to make the debt go away.
And she disregarded every bit of his advice as it triggered her💀
Yup. You have Pity, but it goes away fast when you take into account her aversion to good decisions. Wouldn’t be shocked to see her pregnant by a deadbeat again in the near future
She crazy and you hit the nail on the head that other guy supports the fuck out of her and them kids
@@hornetguy9063 jesus christ she was young, can you chill?
She makes me sad. She refuses to help herself or her kids. No child support. No better job. She’s a drowning person actively refusing life rafts
Her situation will worsen unless she changes. And it’s not just about spending less. As Caleb proved, it’s about earning more.
I know honestly I was just sad watching her video
This budget with $26 left over doesn't even account for her Sam's membership, annual car registration, birthday or Christmas gifts, even a dollar from the tooth fairy, school supplies or field trips. It isn't sustainable. ☹️
I know right? Like at LEAST GET CHILD SUPPORT!!
From personal experience, Chewy can definitely be cheaper on certain items. I have shopped at numerous local pet stores both major chains and small business and since most companies have shyed away from good loyalty programs, the delivery service through Chewy ends up being cheaper at best, no more expensive at worst and it's delivered to my home which saves fuel and time.
Fun fact. I work for a chewy warehouse
This is the correct take. I too shopped around and it was comparable to walmart prices for food / litter. And walmart is always out of stock on the stuff we normally get. But with chewy I can get a 22lb bag of food delivered monthly alongside a pail of litter, then change it up to 3 pails of litter that all gets shipped for free. That alone is worth it in gas/time to not have to source locally.
Funnily enough @CalebHammer mentioned petsmart as the comparison company.... Petsmart owns Chewy heh.
Chewy absolutely is a good method. I hope he notices the comments about it in case he has future audits that bring up Chewy. If anything, anyone with a pet should know about Chewy.
That may be, but arguing about chewy is missing the forest for the trees in this case.
She's in survival mode and probably can't picture herself on the other side of struggle especially if that's all she's known her entire life. Having a child at 16 especially if no one teaches you how to be a mom is tough. Girl, just know that you and your children deserve everything that you wish for and more. It's your God given right and I wish you the best!
She should’ve kept her legs closed lmao
@@mackeejack6731 You should have kept your mouth closed lmao
@@baconoftheark That you think America is a first world nation is hilarious tbh
The best thing Caleb has said this episode in reference to child support - "He put it in you Soo he owes. Stick it in, Pay up." "The court is calling… Oh, and wrap it up next time" 😂😂
LOL!!
It's 2 guys and she probably refused abortion. So she is not very smart in the first place
As a therapist, it is interesting to watch these episodes. (Not diagnosing or giving advice or anything). Caleb, it seems like she did benefit from the interview. Even if it highlights her inner conflicts, that helps her to have more awareness. It may still take a long time and I really really hope she might see a therapist to help with taking in information from others and explore where the defenses are coming from. There may be trauma or other issues even if it is not obvious.
She cannot afford to pay for a therapist. Are there free ones in her area I wonder?
I agree with you fellow therapist! These are fascinating to watch.
@@fc7307 she could go through insurance or she could use some platform like Open Path Collective, which is a therapist directory for those offering low fee cash pay sliding scale. There may be additional low fee or free options in her area.
@@baconoftheark Possibly but I can’t know or make guesses without actually sitting with someone and understanding more of their story and how they present. I am a psychodynamic therapist though, which means I focus on the psychological roots of emotional suffering, looking at the connection of the past (which is often in childhood) and their current experiences. So I generally have a perspective that most present symptoms arise from dysfunctional family dynamics growing up, abuse (emotional, verbal or physical). There can always be a single traumatic incident or multiple traumatic incidents that impact present symptoms as well. Hope this helps!
@@fc7307 maybe she can get one through her health insurance?
Stitch Fix for your kids is absolutely ridiculous. Growing up all we wore were hand me downs and thrifted clothing b/c my parents couldn't afford brand new clothes every year. I loved the thrift store as a kid. You can buy the whole damn Goodwill store with $166 my god. ESPECIALLY living in Texas, I grew up in California.
Have you been to a Goodwill store recently? It's is not cheap. The prices are ridiculous. Sometimes it's cheaper to find sales on new clothing.
It amazes me how much mental health plays off with the financial decision and situations people are into.
It’s amazing how 90% of the time, it’s mental health issues the ones managing their finances. Sad.
Absolutely, mental aspect is very important I have to consistently keep battling the urges to spend
Well adjusted people do not associate with crazies.
Mentally ill birds of a feather swim together
The “I never thought having money was important” but having 2 kids is absolutely insane. And then also working so much for so little and arguing about getting an EASIER BETTER PAYING job? She’s making this life harder than it needs to be.
With all that said I hope this experience was eye opening for her and she can build for something better. It’s easy to comment and not easy to go on the show and have your financial flaws displayed.
Caleb audibly not catching on about what the “vitamins” actually are 😂
You caught that too... 150 bucks for vitamins? Vita-Weed maybe lol.
Lol I was wondering if anyone else caught that.
LOL I didn't even realise it until your comment😭
Still didn’t catch on until right now lol
Came to make this comment. It's a melatonin-adjacent supplement that improves appetite and sleep
Miss wasn't triggered. She had issues with ACCEPTING the truth. She had an explanation for everything, and that tells me all I need to know about where she thinks she is.
The more I learn about people the more I appreciate having two married and amazing parents.
I remember learning what divorce was when I was young. I was about 10 and I remember it being really sad hearing what some kids had to go through. I sat there and thanked God my parents were happily together and would never do that.
Month later my mom files for divorce and kicks my dad out and spends the rest of his life trying to fuck him over in any way legally possible.
Knowing both sides so clearly, I'm very genuinely happy that your parents are together.
Having 2 parents in the home is possibly the biggest indicator of future success
Whether your married or not before having kids is the number 1 indicator of whether your family will end up in poverty or not
💯!! Unfortunately there’s a a lot groups out there who want to destroy the nuclear family
@tymondabrowski12 a great point, it's simply far better odds to have 2 parents in the home to get to those goals. Even to stray into politics momentarily, a husband and wife is the best indicator. Seeing how men and women interact with each other shows any gender child what healthy habits and relationships between adults look like. Siblings are also very helpful in socializing children and adapting to stressful or unhappy circumstances. I don't want to push religion or politics, but the nuclear family is traditional because it works in the long run.
I was told by investors that a landlords favorite tenant is a single mother because they will never leave, never make a maintenance complaint, and won't complain about any gradual rent increases. Her statement about not wanting to quit her job because she's a single mother is just backing up how people can take advantage of people petrified of change
Clearly you haven't met that many single moms. They come in all varieties. Some are the worst tenants out there. Use their kids as an excuse to trash the place, be late on rent, etc etc
@@cheesecurd100sI’m sure there’s a target demographic. Because I’ve also seen both kinds; women who are so terrified because they’re not under anyone’s protection (and I’m dead serious, women generally love men that make them feel safe and comfortable) would often prefer to completely avoid risk and uncertainty, especially as the ones solely responsible for their children. Then there’s ones who completely embrace degeneracy, probably thanks to being messed in the head.
I feel that this is extremely accurate
Watching these videos reminds me of how privileged I am to have grown up with college educated parents who didn’t tolerate me not going to school or getting someone pregnant. This situation has always been my biggest fear, getting paid a terrible wage, taking care of 2 kids alone, and suffocating in debt. I hope she starts taking the steps to boost her income, hold her baby daddies accountable and stop the unnecessary spending.
It's not a privilege, no one will take your parents away and give you poor ones. You are lucky to be born into a family who knows the value of an education and making smart money moves. Be grateful to your parents and follow their example.
For what it's worth, not going to college isn't an inherently bad thing as long as you're still being productive, building a valuable skill, and are money-conscious. Certainly nowhere near as bad as getting someone pregnant lol
@@goulash31 absolutely, I chose to go the college route, but others things like trades or certifications are perfectly valid too. At least do something that has the potential for growth and development. Being stagnant/complacent is my biggest fear
@@JP-ji6of This. People don't realize you either a college person or not. If you aint, then figure out what trade is for you. I got into machine operating, now ima setup operator for a completely different "field" than I was in before. N I got a $3 raise when I swapped jobs lol. I feel for this lady tho 7 years at a company n only making 16.50. New hires are making the same as her I'd be willing to bet.
She definitely has some sentimental attachment to her job. Maybe the best thing for her to do is ask for a raise. That's a real good way to find out if your boss value's your loyalty. If she's a good employee who they want to keep they'll find a way to pay her better.
Sadly, people are blinded by loyalty because of the "security" instead of taking a risk to better their career and their life. I can feel Caleb's urge to yell sooo much but to make the conversation going, patience is needed. It's hard to hold yourself back in that situation I imagine. Another great episode! Keep up the excellent content my man!
It's not about loyalty, it's about self doubt and (like you said) security.
Both my parents have been working at pretty much minimum wage for their entire lives. At a certain point, people start believing that it's all they are worth and find it impossible to make the jump and get a better paying job. They're already working their butts off for minimum wage and believe they cannot do 2x more to get a job paying 2x more. Or that they are not intelligent enough or what ever other insecurity.
And the more you wait, the harder it is mentally to make the jump and change job and the harder it is to land a job (because the older you are, the less interested the interviewers will be).
It's tough, watching people not value their time and themselves properly.
Yeah, she could at least negotiate with her management. Id say paying her 21-22 an hour would be worth keeping someone with that much experience.
Edit: Also, lady in the interview, if you would like a referral to try to get a job at my company feel free to reach out. I do physician recruitment. There are tons of support roles in the company that you could apply for.
My company allows you to work remote, you essentially make your schedule (within reason but it’s pretty flexible), I think now starts at $52,000 all the benefits she wants, I’ve never heard of someone not being able to take off at the drop of the hat to take care of personal issues. I don’t even think it’s that unique of a company.
Either ask for more money or get a new job.
Most people include myself are just comment for personal entertainment, but this one is actual helpful, pump this comment to the top
Good comment. I hope she sees it.
$16.50/hr as a manager in this economy is unacceptable. She can make at least $5 more working as a manger at McDonald’s in some places. And with that kind of loyalty to a company on her resume, people would be more than willing to hire her in a manager position without her even having to work up to it. She needs to value herself more and she needs to not be so sensitive to the passion he’s showing by yelling about her debt. She should be that passionate about her own situation.
She gets over time makes 3100 after taxes , she said shes basically a cashier.
Being at a company for SEVEN YEARS and them only paying you $16.50 an hour is highway robbery. This is coming from a Canadian perspective where the min wage is higher, but still $16.50 is low for that long of a commitment
I was in a similar situation. Was comfortable at a construction company I worked at out of high school for almost 9 years. Started out at $10/hr in 2011 and up to $21/hr by 2020. Thank God the pandemic happened, cause I learned to respect my value, left the company and started a new job making $22 and within three years am now at $29 with as little or as much overtime as I want. KNOW YOUR WORTH AND GET THE MONEY YOU DESERVE!!!
You might be the only person to ever say “Thank God the pandemic happened.” Oh man.
@@scottanderson6807 Pandemic was profitable for a lot of people, myself included.
Hear hear!!! Know your worth!!
@@Nicole-em9yo Screw your profits. It was a horrible time for many reasons. What a selfish, psychopathic thing to say.
It wasn’t THAT bad
Daisy, you are good enough. It takes no time to submit an online form for child support, and it takes the same amount of time to apply for jobs on indeed. You are enough. I’m saying this because I needed someone to tell me the same thing YEARS ago. once you discover your worth, you will be unstoppable. I’m curious to see how the follow up episode goes.
Keep perpetuating the system gurllll
She was so frustrating to watch because this is voluntary. She signed up for help, pushed back and when he got rightly frustrated, she went to tears. This was her needing help.
It’s not easy to take this type of confrontation. Yes his guests know what to expect but you see it in all their faces, they’re hurt and in a vulnerable state. Her behaviour was normal lol. Not saying Caleb is wrong btw
She is in quicksand and isn't getting out of it fast enough
Gen Z for you
Caleb has a soft/blind spot for mental health
@@phantominsider many of us, yes. Especially women. Although she is too old to be Gen Z technically.
I saw this in another comment and I totally agree - she is having a relationship with the owner / manager of where she works.
🔝ᴍᴇꜱꜱᴀɢᴇ ᴍᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴜꜱᴇʀɴᴀᴍᴇ ᴀʙᴏᴠᴇ ᴏɴ ᴛᴇʟᴇɢʀᴀᴍ…
I’m sending positive vibes that she learns her worth. You deserve a better paying job & child support. Since she can bring her kids to work is a huge reason she doesn’t want to quit. I hope she has a good support structure family & friends 😊❤
Only been watching for a couple weeks, but this has gotta be my favorite thing on UA-cam atm. Both extremely educational and entertaining at the same time. S/o to you
I appreciate it
Financial Audit is better than TLC and MTV.
Edit: Every like is a kiss goodnight.
Pretty low bar to be fair
Neither of those channels have been relevant for a decade +
FACTS
I think Puck should’ve got kicked out of the house.
Nahhhh. What a weird comparison also
Viva la bam? Jackass? The dudesons?
This will never match the nostalgia those hold for many people
$700 for rent sounds like income restricted apartments. I wonder if she doesn’t want to get a higher paying job to avoid losing her eligibility.
I thought so too….but she said she has a roommate whom she splits rent/utilities with.
I really appreciate the way Caleb handled this. He always balances kindness and understanding with the kind of "tough love" people need to understand the gravity of their situations.
I can't believe a single mother would not go for child support. It does t matter what YOU feel or "confrontation". Your kids are your priority and not having income support that is THEIR legal right is deplorable. YOUR feelings do not matter!
I knew a woman like this working in nonprofit (which doesn’t pay well). When she found out she was pregnant, her on & off again boyfriend asked her to get an abortion, saying he was done being a father, having already raised his kids from a previous marriage, and she almost did. (He also ghosted her).
She was nearly 40, had always wanted to marry and have a family, and when they explained that she wouldn’t likely have another chance at a child, especially with endometriosis & another health problem, she decided not to have an abortion.
So she claimed that it was her sole responsibility since she knew he didn’t want the baby and she blamed herself for the birth control f up (a lapse when switching BC due to a chronic disease she was also treating).
She didn’t seek child support. She moved back closer to family supports, (her elderly mother) and I asked her if she honestly believed women owe men an abortion if he asks her to scrape a baby out of her body, or if men are entitled to accountability-free procreation. I mean, he knows how to use a condom, and he also knows that blowing his load in a woman makes a life… why was he entitled to consequence free reproduction?
She said she didn’t want him to think that she wanted to use him & didn’t want to upset him in case one day he wanted to meet his daughter. Her daughter was nearly 4 and he hadn’t wanted to know anything about her… I got the impression that she was very lonely, and wanted to love someone & be loved in return.
Made me mad as hell, because it was a situation where he never wanted kids, she always did, they both knew that from the start. She wanted marriage one day, he played along as if he might want to marry again one day, so to me it was obvious that he was using her desperation to sponge up the love she gave while stringing her along, when both shouldn’t have been messing with each other the moment they learned they differed on wanting children. He was just as responsible for making a baby as she was. But she really believed that women who refuse to get an abortion are “forcing” men into fatherhood.
She was black, kind and dignified, and I got the impression that she was fighting stereotypes that black men make of single mothers & child support, because she would say “I’m not like this kind of woman, or that kind of woman” in regards to misogynistic tropes about gold diggers, “baby mamas”, & welfare moms.
I said “F all that, at the end of the day, it’s about what’s best for a little girl not you”.
She said “men who feel forced into fatherhood will just work under the table, & they resent their kids”.
I said “you don’t control that, I know men who married, planned their kids, then divorced because they ran up credit card debt, then worked under the table to avoid child support so they could continue being irresponsible”
But I couldn’t talk sense into her, because she was still holding out hope that if she didn’t upset her daughter’s father, that she would be giving her daughter the opportunity to meet him one day.
@@rair1118 Probably took it raw after the club and now she is stuck with her results.
Dude my local Home Depot is paying $16 for entry level clerk and $25~26 for head cashier.
I work at a very similar job that she does (from the sound of it), and GMs make salary + commissions, so an average pay is 80-100k. Operation/Assistant managers make 45-70k, but you could make much more. I wonder if she is just taking on some responsibilities without actually being given that title/pay.
She came here to be shouted at but nothing more. It was like a confessional. She wasn't actually prepared to go further than she had already decided to go prior to the conversation.
She could probably be a department manager at Home Depot for $22. Boom $5.50/hrs raise and an xtra $850 a month on 40 hrs
Caleb, you're the voice of reason that she needed to hear. You handled this well, and I agree with you that having a pet when you're drowning in debt is irresponsible. I hope she gets the help she needs ❤❤
What's really scary is the two kids will grow thinking this is how to live. They'll end up in six figure debt living paycheck to paycheck if she continues on this path. I really hope for her and their sake she takes this as a wake up call.
I think living paycheck to paycheck on a low level job will disqualify you from getting lines of credit or loans big enough to land you in such a debt in the first place.
Riiight
They’ll also have kids by the time they’re 16
@@PrimericanIdol not student loans... I aged out of foster care, worked in fast food and they would have given me over 100k for a film degree when I was 18... thankfully I didn't take it, not because I was financially responsible but because I didn't want to move away from my fiancé. Maybe they won't take the bait either but it won't be because of financial knowledge either.
Not necessarily. My parents were maybe 10k in debt by the time I noticed. I never knew the cards they were using were credit cards versus debit ones. Still, I was a kid and didn't really understand nor care because I was being fed and taken care of. I ended up having completely different habits than my parents, not because they taught me or because of their own habits, I just took in the lessons as they came with experience.
Damn!!!!! That was intense. This girl needs a follow up in 6 months PLEASE CALEB!!!!!!!!
I have not seen you struggle to get through to someone like this!! Wow wow wow
The lizard enclosure killed me. “I don’t need it, she does” 😂😂😂
Already at 400k.
I think the recession especially is going to launch Caleb to 1 million
This one is so hard to watch. She’s so scared to make her life better. She has the tools all she has to do it do it. I hope she does it soon.
It’s always interesting to me when people say their grocery spend will be lower than suggested at the budget phase, when they are not factoring in they have been spending like $1000 on take out and restaurants. Of course your grocery bill will increase if you cut out the fast food.
This is exactly what I was thinking!!
I am hoping it's because she realized her kids quality for free breakfast and lunch at school and she found a food pantry.
You took the words right put of my mouth!
Good point. Groceries are so much.
Im 28 too, this hit me hard lol, I’m applying for better jobs . I was doing this before, watching this episode. I’m not in debt, and thank god I live with my parents. I don’t have alot money responsibilities, but i been careless with my money. I could save alot more. So thanks caleb.
Also, I live in New York. Even, getting a better paying job, that I can afford to get an apartment. I rather pay rent to my parents, than a land lord, rent with roommates that can be messy .
But I know, when I get married. This will change!! But yeah .
I use to feel bad living with my parents .
Also, I got an phone job interview. Hoping it goes well, if not I’ll not give up .
Sadly, probably due to low self-esteem, her aversion to conflict, or feeling easily overwhelmed, she’s clearly paralysed by a fear of change. She’s been in this job for years, she’s familiar with the work, the culture, she probably has colleagues that she considers friends, maybe a boss who’s understanding about her kids… the concept of moving to a new workplace where she doesn’t know anyone is probably terrifying. That unfortunately means she isn’t willing to find out how much better life could be were she to leave and find a new job. Better hours, better work environment, and especially better pay, because even if her company are nice to her, they are 100% taking advantage of her with that low a salary after all the time she’s given them.
I hope she finds enough courage to take that leap, if not for herself then at least for her kids.
She seems like a really sweet girl who was told she wasn’t worth shit growing up, and never left that headspace (even after reaching her 20s and having kids). I hope that she is able to recognize her own inherent worth one day. ❤
She put herself in a bad predicament by having her first kid at 16. Just being blunt kids are great but that is just rough.
@@austinjacobsen7689 It is rough. I am not making a declaration about her background or mental health, but sadly there is a positive relationship between early childhood abuse/neglect and teenage pregnancy. In the US, it has even been recommended that teen moms be screened for trauma symptoms during pre-natal appointments (even if the child was conceived during consensual sex).
I absolute know a girl like this who also had a kid very young and very similar mom to this
Girl
She needs therapy. He didn’t bring that up but I feel like he should’ve.
@Henny’s Auto Detailing He did, but she claimed "there's no trauma" and she just "doesn't like yelling." Personally, I press X to doubt too. I think she badly needs mental health support.
I notice a lot of people vastly overestimate how much work they can do. The whole idea of "If I do overtime every day I don't have to change anything" shows up with a lot of the people on this channel.
Had a coworker with that attitude. She wanted to work 50 hours a week. She burnt out after a couple months. I know some blue collar folks are going to rip on how 50 hours is a part time job, but it's a lot of hours for people who aren't used to it. It's also usually eating up an extra day of your week and you end up with only 1 day off. It's tough to do long term if you don't come from a field where that's required.
@@orbbb24 Lol 50 hours a week is not hard work, especially if you are just doing paperwork.
She doesn't even recognize that forcing her kids to come to work with her to save on childcare is extremely detrimental to them. Imagine spending your childhood at Mommy's work :(
I used to go to a mom and pop Chinese buffet like almost everyday for lunch. Fam biz. The lady had her 2 children there either helping out or doing their homework. Felt bad for the kids.
it may be boring but it's not detrimental, it's better than being at home watching TV
@@BlazinTigger Kids aren't supposed to be at their parents' work all day. How can she even responsibly watch them while she's working and being a manager? I doubt her employer appreciates it, if they even know about it. It's incredibly unprofessional and also a legal liability. Maybe if she actually started behaving like an adult and sought the child support her kids deserve and are entitled to, she could afford appropriate childcare.
@@BlazinTigger i do understand that its a form of survival since the childcare system is broken. I just felt bad because kids are supposed to be kids.
@@willapple8145 how do you suggest we fix the childcare system? Cut wages of people watching children and force them to then bring their kids?