I think I have dissociation not just anxiety. I’ve heard someone else who has it say it was like being drunk but without the fun tipsy part. Personality, I know I don’t feel sober, I feel “off” but yeah.
I've dealt with anxiety my whole life and more recently have struggled with derealization. I definitely feel like I have little to no memory of years of my life because of this. To whomever reads this and relates, you're not alone. ❤️
@@thc7865To be honest, some days are harder than others but overall my anxiety has become a lot more manageable with the aid of CBT therapy and medication :) Thank you for asking 💜
Atleast for me, disassociation attacks are much different and so much more scary than normal panic attacks. I can normally feel a panic attack coming on even for a few seconds before, like a huge wave coming, but for disassociation, I can be driving and all of a sudden I just feel completely empty inside and like I’m in a dream, despite nothing setting me off. PTSD is a freaking monster.
I definitely feel like lately I've been feeling disassociation when I sit down and am not doing nothing, things feel weird and don't feel real. It only happens when I sit down and don't do anything though, when it happens I don't believe things around me and i feel like I could get up, walk around and nobody would react or notice
Maybe it only happens when you sit down because otherwise you are distracting yourself enough?? Just an idea.. but I do know that working through any trauma or upset we have struggled with can make the dissociation go away :) xoxo
Kati Morton thank you for replying, yeah that's what I've been thinking myself that when I'm up I'm busy and therefore distracting myself where as when I sit down I'm not distracting myself at all. I went to a counselor and they diagnosed me with OCPD but I stopped as it was making my job very difficult going there
I've been getting this recently and it seems to be when I am doing a lot of cooking at my parents house! At first I was scared, because I recognized the feeling as much like something I experience when high from pot almost, without the other effects. I didn't know if I was being exposed to something that was poisoning me or getting a lack of oxygen to the brain some how. It's happened again today and I just remained calm through it and just tried to ride it out but it took a while to stop happening. I am too embarrassed to tell my mother I was cooking with that I was doing through that, but my sense of time felt completely gone and I was spacing out constantly, I guess disconnected with everything.
I’m in a 24/7 state of dissociation. depersonalization and derealization. I’ve been like this for 7 years and have been diagnosed with ptsd. Sadly, it doesn’t help me cope with anything.
me too, sometimes its worse than others! I rarely have panic attacks though, i guess its because the disassociation "protects" me.....id rather have panic attacks
Watermelon Ludmilla Panic attack’s I can feel and I hate it, but believe when I dissociate is worse because I don’t notice. When I’m driving and dissociate it’s not safe because I don’t remember any part of the drive from point A to point B until I get there and like how did I get here.
Dpdr is 100% anxiety fueled by intrusive and negative thought patterns. Dissasocation is masking anxiety. I have both from abuse & making slow baby steps. Doesn't matter how long you have em there's people who had it 30 years and got over it in months (not to discredit you ik how hard it is). Yeah diets help and exercise etc to help distract and also build confidence but mainly it's going with the flow being in the now and eliminating ruminating intrusive thoughts. Shaun oconnor has a great program to help. Once you can make even the smallest of breakthroughs in DPDR you can start to consciously work thru trauma lil by lil . It's all about your mindset of wanting to get better and having patience. Recovery from anything. Drugs obesity depression abuse trauma. All takes time tender loving care. Tlc. Patience & willpower. It's never too late. you deserve to feel good again
I think I get dissociation most when I'm ignoring my anxious feelings. It's like my mind's way of saying, "HELLO! WE NEED TO DEAL WITH THIS! ... Oh, you don't want to? Okay, bye." *disconnects* When I'm focusing on my anxious feelings, they'll turn into a panic attack.
I find that I can bring myself to dissociation by thinking too much about my surroundings. I start thinking,”there’s a lot of people here... do I look weird? Can they tell I have anxiety? Am I going to pass out ? If I pass out who will take care of my kids?” It’s awful. I then dissociate
exactly. it happens to me when i drive usually. "am i going to have a panic attack? if i do, then i might crash!" and that causes more of the feelings of having a panic attack. the brain is wild and scary :(
Andrew Noyes Exactly. I’m going through this same issue. It’s scary but I try to fight through it. I was in a car accident & had a few panic attacks after that to cause me to feel like this.
Sometimes I will disassociate & have a panic attack totally randomly. No trigger or warning; I just get shortness of breath, I can't move or feel my limbs, and I'll feel nauseous. It's absolutely strange and terrifying. I feel that even though I'm not currently thinking about stress, it's still there in my subconscious and it erupts every once in a while.
I was doing a speech and I remembered being so stressed and anxious that my soul kind of escaped out of my body, I blanked out. I don’t remember the rest, I just ended up sitting on a chair.
i needed to see this, ive had severe panic attacks every day lately and disassociating all day and at this point i feel doomed and like i won’t make it through this, but it’s humbling to see that other people deal with this and i’m not alone.
for me, dissociation is usually a major part of what i feel during a panic attack, but I find myself dissociating quite often during daily life regardless of whether or not I'm panicking. Not sure how it correlates with my anxiety levels as I have a hard time registering in the moment and processing later but it just kind of feels like I'm not stressed out or nervous but just watching myself be a person from afar as opposed to living in my body as I interact with others, work, etc.
It's so interesting how many different ways anxiety presents. I've only had a panic attack once. Usually, my anxiety just presents with insomnia, loss of appetite or nervous ticks like tearing at my nails. Those are the only outward signs anyway. Most people probably wouldn't know I'm anxious. I know other people who have a completely different set of symptoms. It seems that is often why mental health issues are so hard for people to relate to.
Great timing. I haven't had disassociation for a few years but it started again a few days ago. My anxiety has been super high recently and I am not really sure why.
@@elainasmith1700 and Sarah Whitelam, do you guys wanna like talk about it? ive had disassociation for 8 months now with no breaks.. Could really be helpful to talk to someone more experienced..
The idea that dissociation can come out of nowhere from being overwhelmed just like panic attacks makes so much sense to me. I thought I couldn't be disassociating because when have in the past it is not in situations that are particularly stressful. But I have Autism and GAD so I can get overwhelmed easily from just basic stimulous. I'll seemingly be fuctioning "normally" one second then suddenly be unable to make even the most basic of decisions or take simple actions.
I have constant dissociation like I’m always disconnected and detached from reality in this constant dream state and I can’t bring myself back :( I haven’t felt anxious as much because it’s the summer holidays and no exams yet I still am so not here
Ive been diagnosed with general anxiety. When I was younger, I used to have panic attacks all the time, back then I was still living with or seeing my abusive mother. Lately, since I’ve cut ties with her especially, I happen to dissociate much more and have far less panic attacks. The strange thing to me is that I also dissociate in happy times. Like, if I’m expecting a big event, like a concert of a band I love or a big trip I had been planning for months, I will dissociate.
I swear I felt like I was going crazy cause I felt emotionally numb most of the time. It’s only until watching videos about dissociation that all of this feeling like I’m losing track of time and questioning reality that it’s because of dissociation. I really think I might need therapy.
Sometimes when my anxiety is really bad it feels like I'm completely numb and not.. there? It's so hard to try to describe the feeling I have. It's like I'm floating through life, I'll have trouble concentrating on anything, I'll forget what was said in a conversation that I just had. I don't really have panic attacks but I feel like this quite often. I'm really glad I watched this because I wasn't sure if what I felt had a name. Thank you 💖
I’ve been dissociated for so long that I don’t even remember what it feels like to feel normal anymore, the reason why I know I’m still dissociated at all is because I remember how weird and distressed it made me when it first started happening, and I’ve never experienced any feeling of going back, even though I can’t remember what it felt like before. I also have weird moments every now and then when it basically feels like reality punches me in the face and suddenly everything is super loud and clear and crisp and immediate and detailed and it feels so overwhelmingly strange like I don’t even know what’s going on, usually triggered by looking at my face in a mirror too long or suddenly being too aware of my own voice, but it doesn’t last long at all and everything will kinda fuzz out. I mostly feel like I don’t really inhibit this world, I’m just something deep inside of my head and my body isn’t really me or connected to me, I’m just inside my head looking through my eyes. It’s hard to describe. Even when I talk it doesn’t really feel like I’m talking most of the time, just my mouth rambling on it’s own, even if “it’s” saying things that I’m thinking about. Sometimes I go so far out that I somehow feel disconnected from my own thoughts and I don’t even know what I was just thinking and I don’t feel like I exist at all, like I’m nothing and there is nothing. I also don’t feel anything when I’m like that, not even boredom. I could stare at a wall for three hours and it would make no difference. Usually though I’m just in a place where i feel mostly numb and the only thing that comes through are strong emotions like anxiety(all the time) and an awful sense of hopelessness. My days go by in a blur and all my memories are as if in third person. As well as being hazy and unclear. It’s made my memory and attention span terrible. But like I said before, hard to explain, and this is just the tip of the iceberg lmao. It’s been this way for years now.
I am so happy you made this video because I have anxiety and I spent the majority of my 20s feeling like I have just been out of my body and I never understood why. This really helped me to understand myself more. Thank you so so much!!
I am so glad you made this video. 10 years ago I suffered such severe anxiety that I went through BOTH Depersonalization and Derealization. Beginning of May I developed depression that followed with anxiety. And I’m back to the Derealization. I feel like I’m on autopilot sometimes and i keep obsessing with thoughts like “what did I just do 10 seconds ago?” It’s a very odd feeling and I wouldn’t wish it on my worse enemy ! Going to group therapy has helped me a bit
I'm more prone to panic attacks than dissociation, but in looking back, I think dissociation has happened at times when I was really vulnerable or had the potential for a bad panic attack (most frequently this in the grocery store, or occasionally when out with friends and plans are changing too fast for me to handle).
My worst day with anxiety, I had two full blown panic attacks in a row, and then a bunch of small ones after that. And the only way my brain could stop the panic, was by dissociation. There was a lot of stuff that went into that day being rough, and I'm still processing it in therapy. Also, this video helps a lot because I often feel like I can either dissociate, or have anxiety.
I've never heard of dissociation, but in the past, I have struggled with panic attacks. This is really interesting to know how different peoples' anxiety plays out. I'm really glad someone is talking about anxiety and it's causes on UA-cam because I know causes because I've talked to my doctor, but so many people are kind of confused about what anxiety truly is
Its so hard to be a man with panic attacks, because im always supposed to be calm, collected, confident, and in control. I hste this shit but little by little i get better thanks Kati!!!
I needed this so much, a lot of times when I had panic attacks I was forgetting everything and even that I was anxious, sometimes I couldn't even remember that I had a panic attack and what happened during that time
i dont get how the brain is "protecting itself" during anxiety or depression with derealization because when i start getting derealization and feeling detached like that i start freeking out and my panic gets even worse! deffinitley doesnt seem like anything is protecting itself
this was really interesting! I've always wondered why I was surprisingly "good" at presentations in school despite struggling quite a bit with anxiety, I knew I was dissociating during them but I never understood why that happened. I'd be nauseous and shaking before the presentation, probably after an all-nighter, but then when it was go time my brain just kind of went into autopilot and ran the script while I "watched". never knew this was actually this ripcord situation rather than random "convenient" (if uncomfortable) mental absence. thank you, I learned something about myself today!
I am severely depressed at the moment. One of my best friends just stabbed himself in the arm because his girlfriend broke up with him. He sent me pictures and everything. This led to a major panic attack and a passed out from hallucination. I feel really overwhelmed. I feel that you are the only person I can trust now. I might not have been alive without you x
The first time I felt dissociation I was 11. It lasted 3 days, and I was scared to tell anyone what I was feeling because it was so hard to explain. I prayed to God to make me "forget" these episodes...I did..but it came back with a vengeance in my 20s..😔
I have anxiety attacks. Once I calm down from an attack I often feel myself dissociating. It’s like my brain knows that I can keep breaking down, but I still can’t escape the anxiety so my brain sort of shuts down for a while until I can come back to baseline. This can take a long time though. Trying to pull myself out of dissociation is almost enough to send me back into an anxiety attack...
What you say makes sense. I always had trouble with dissociation. Once I started learning about it and paying attention I noticed that I would dissociate when I felt overwhelmed from PTSD. Sometimes it would happen so quickly I wouldn't have a chance to even notice it happening. I think it was my body's way of keeping from having a panic attack since I rarely had those. But the anxiety was always there before dissociating. Sometimes I'll still dissociate and it's always when I'm worried about something or my energy is taxed.
I have this! :’( omg sometime I lose it and feel like I’m not even here when I’m having a panic attack! I hope you know what I mean! I feel so happy I found you through Shane! I’m literally crying because you’re a God sent to me! Have you Kati! ❤️
I didn't even know the word for that feeling before this video! I get both panic attacks and dissociation. Now I know both stem from my anxiety. Thank you for enlightening me!
Dissociative State feels like your spirit or soul is desperately trying to get out of the body to escape physical panic attack symptoms....when the state of panic lingers then subsides....you still feel outside yourself.
I had a terrible trauma triggered panic attack this morning.. And now I'm feeling really separated from my emotions. I dont know what I'm feeling or thinking and everything around me feels funny. I needed this video.
What if it’s the other way around I feel like I’m dissociating all the time like every day, and me feeling this way leads to panic attacks and lots of negative thoughts ?? What are ways to cope with it or make it go away ?
Where’s this video been all my life? This explains what’s happening for me right now so well. I think it’s mostly dissociation but with some panic attacks when I’m feeling a little more grounded. Thank you so, so much 🙌🏻♥️
I am so glad it was helpful!!! I am sorry you're struggling with it, but hopefully some of my older videos about dissociation and panic attacks can help too!! xoxo
I know I suffer more from intense dissociation. The only time I have had a (hyperphysical) panic attack was because I was in an intense argument that I was reacting to. I more often find myself separating and its honestly terrifying.
I'm going through a completely life changing time right now & i have had both panic attacks & dissociation. I just attended my first bpd support group last night. I really appreciate your videos kati, thank you !
Why can't more Therapists be as empathic as you are!!? I'm currently in a situation where I am stuck and I need to move and change my job and home, but it takes a while. I'm in this situation since January, walking back and forth, trying to find my place in the world... I just needed to say, my therapist is really bad and I currently can't change that. It's bad.
I wonder if I’m the only one who has dissociated so bad. I spectated out of my body and look at life as terrible and bland. I forget who I am, my own personality, I felt like I’d never get it back. i lost some spirituality and faith....but I realized our person it’s all inside what we value as people and why we love and are attracted to what we are attracted to already and to never change that. Soul? The Panic attacks are fear because I never want to loose myself or my values or my personality. I hope this is relatable or helpful to anybody
I’m gonna try real hard to explain what it feels like for me because it is wild, but yeah, you explained it really well. I often dissociate during or after a panic attack. It’s really weird. Because my brain just like, idk, slows down? And my consciousness just gets pushed to the back of my head, and I’m just watching things happen through groggy eyes.
I don’t really have panic attacks but I do dissociate often. Makes sense that I never remember why it happened in the first place, for me, it came out of nowhere. I don’t like that state of mind, the atmosphere around me can get so weird and borderline creepy at times. For a long time I thought I was just going crazy
Same thing is happening to me atm ..sucks .I had bad stress due to court then started to worry about it..n got panick attacks then felt disoriented. And more I think about having it worse it gets
Loved this video...I hadn't correlated panic and dissociation. I tend to go from anxiety to dissociation. They're both bad to live with, but at least with dissociation it feels like I'm in a glass box. A doll in a box...I can't feel anything and nothing can touch me...freaky, huh?
I deal with both and I think you're hypothesis is correct. There are times I do one or the other, both are dependent on my overall health and the circumstance to bring on that level of stress. Something traumatic usually will bring on dissociation and non-trauma usually panic.
ugh, Kati freaking Morton I just love you. I wish everyone understood how deeply my anxiety disorder affects me the way that you do. thank you so much xoxo
I have depersonalizations / déréalisation disorder because of my excessive anxiety. I am so happy that you made a video about this. Even though it doesn’t necessarily answer how to fix things, it’s just really comforting. So thanks Kati❤️
I struggle really bad with dissociation. I have dissociated for as long as a full month at a time. I would say 2 and a half years but I had short spurts of reality during those times where I was back in control and can fully remember those times. I’ve been having this problem for so long I can’t figure out when it’s happening or how to stop it. Just recently I have been researching my C-PTSD more and I came across the channel Post Traumatic Victory. Fantastic channel. The woman who Volgs her life and shares stories, experiences, and advice that I find pretty helpful and it has helped me to notice every now and then when I’m dissociative or when I have just come back to reality. I’m not sure how to properly say that so “coming to reality” is the best way I can explain it. It truly ruins my life sometimes. I live with my partner and she gets frustrated with me, but tries to be understanding, when I don’t remember ever having a conversation with her or even remembering I ever said something. She will remind me that I need to take clean dishes out of the dishwasher or bring something into the apartment from the car and I will not even remember ever having the conversation. My brain blocks out a lot of things and it causes me to be very unproductive and upset because I want to do things but I can’t. My social anxiety is ridiculous. I want to go to the store and just be normal. I literally just want to go get a gallon of milk but something so simple and quick ends up a horrendous mess because I can not handle it. Something so simple as getting the mail from the mailbox just won’t happen. I can walk half way to the door and freeze in fear. And I won’t go outside, my body tells me I can’t, I won’t. And I try to push through it but it just won’t do for me. My mind says “Screw your mailbox trip that isn’t even a big deal. You’re not going outside. Someone will see you. You’re home alone so if someone notices that they’re going to come hurt you in your home. You’re not safe. Don’t be seen. Don’t go outside. Don’t let anyone know you’re here.”...... I can’t afford health insurance. I can’t even afford a new car much less to even fix the one I have now. I want to badly to be able to get the help I need and try to fix what is broken in my mind and mend the hurt and pain that someone else caused but I don’t have the means to do so. I find it very hard to even get out of bed most of the time but I push myself really hard so that one day I won’t forget that I even got out of bed in the morning. One day I won’t have to try to remember that I was supposed to feed and water my cat 6 hours before and worry that I didn’t and she’ll be hungry all day until I get home from work. One day I’ll just know. One day I’ll remember and thank myself for getting the help I needed to learn how to teach my body’s natural response system that it’s ok, I’m ok, everything is ok and no one is going to hurt me again.
I had a derealization episode last night when I was at the gym. I was on the elliptical, and all of the sudden, the environment felt very different and my head felt like this sort of fog and nothing around me seemed like it was before. It felt like everything was 2 dimensional and hollow. I usually wait it out and it goes away after 20 mins or an hour. But then I got another episode when I got home and my eyes started to hurt and every time I'd read something, I'd feel dizzy and it felt like I was in a weird bubble that was disconnected from everything around me. And like you said, it happened out of no where.
It actually happens a lot to me. Like, when I'm feeling anxious I have a panic attack if it's something really serious, that really bothers me, and then I dissociate and I can't feel what's real or not real anymore. But dissociation has always happened to me, even when I was little and I didn't know what it was! I always wondered if what I was living was real, and after so many years realizing what it is was so satisfying. But also it got me worried because it's really serious. So yeah these two things are always kinda related but I can be anxious and dissociate without having a panic attack. It really depends on the matter. But dissociation... I think that's always there.
I have had many light feelings over dissociation out of no where but I have had only just eight severe dissociation attack things where I was crying and shaking and screaming ...
I agree. If your brain cant deal with the anger angst frustration or whatever. Instead of lashing out. It turns into feeling nothing at all. Numb. And you begin to dissosiate. Used to happen to me all the time in my teens. I think my nervous system was so sensitive to my outer surrounding. Loud sounds, high voices, etc. So my body just shut down to protect itself. It hasnt happened since i started with SSRI. The medication kind of gives me a thicker layer to protect my senses.
i had my first panic attack 3 weeks ago. i thought that I was having a heart attack/dying. since then I have been to a doctor to get a blood test and an ECG and they both came back completely fine. last night I felt extremely dizzy and had the most terrifying panic attack. for me, i feel my heart beating fast, shortness of breath and a sensation that feels like the drop on a rollercoaster or when somebody startles you. i ended up calling an ambulance last night and went to hospital, everything was fine but today has been so draining. i just want this to stop :(
Good explanation! I tend to dissociate rather than have panic attacks. But I have had both in the past. When I dissociate I tend to get body memories too, those aren't very fun at all. I try to do grounding techniques when these happen, not always successful.
This is a tricky one for me because often I'm just dissociating anyway from tired, the weather, change etc etc which numbs the anxiety, but other times I do end up having a panic attack and I feel the moment I start dissociating and all the anxiety suddenly vanishes to nothing
This video came out at a spooky timing for me. When I was in high school (which wasn't long ago) I would have lots of panic attacks, I'd still be very out of it and daydreamy but for the past few months I've been feeling a different kind of spaced out, felt it before but not like this. This video was real helpful, thank you
I struggle mostly with panic attacks, Earlier this year I had two panic attacks back to back. A huge one when I was relaxing at home after long day at work and a small one when i was at work. It really freaked me out
I don’t know exactly what it is for me but when I get overwhelmed about things that I can’t change, or feel like I have no control over myself and my life I feel like I’m not there (I could stare at the ceiling and feel like I’m not there) and at the same time wishing I could unplug my mind so I could rest from that feeling of anguish.
Hi Kati, to answer your question, I’ve never had a panic attack, but anxiety has been for me a dissociation source for...almost all my life.! I still get frustrated when, when I feel just a tiny bit uncomfortable with someone or a situation, even for a few seconds, I’ll feel dissociated for the rest of the day, sometimes the week. Terapy has certainly helped, since I get in better touch with my feelings, concerns, etc, and my brain feels more at ease with them now! Thanks for your videos!
My dissociation is becoming bad and I feel like I’m losing all my good days to it. I can’t control it anymore and sometimes I have such a hard time coming back to reality. It’s horrible.
@@brittanyaw2171 I really wish I could give you a proper answer but I really just started paying more attention to myself and practiced healing more than dwelling on trauma. A lot of my disassociation began at an early age Bc of a fucked up childhood but once I learned how to heal and let go of what was hurting me so badly I eventually got out of that hole. I know it may seem like an never ending loop right now and you might feel so numb but it will get better, I promise.
You always know the perfect time, and topic to upload. It’s 3am in aus and this is so on point right now. Thank you for everything you do. I love your heart!
What if you don't really have dissociation but you're constantly worried about having it, so it makes you anxious and start to look for it🤷♂️. Then freak yourself out 🙄
I don't think I still understand Dissociation. Sometimes, when I'm feeling stressed, I feel dizzy and tired. I feel like I'm floating and I can't see straight or focus on vision on things. Everything gets blurry like I'm suddenly drunk. Is that dissociation? Like a physical sensation like that?
That, or in my case, I also feel like everything is... not really there. Or not really happening, as in a dream or movie. I become unable to have any kind of real emotional response, even my own body feels weird.
Yes, everything feel detached and weird .... at times like those I wonder if I even exist or if I am making it all up. It is very draining and exhausting to deal with those feelings.
Felipe Revuelta Everyones experience with dissociation is pretty subjective, but it always feel like you're detached from reality. So, you COULD be experiencing dissociation, but you're going to have to think about it yourself. If it feels like you're detached from reality, you have dissociation.
I get very clumsy and dizzy. It really feels like my consciousness shrinks. It feels like my body carries me on its own instead of me controlling my body. My memory of when I dissociate is very bright and blurry, like I can't make out faces or details.
Just started therapy 2 months ago and it has sent my anxiety into a tailspin. I have always lost chunks of my day and its bothered me but its not like something that was in my way. Its gotten so much worse and I feel like I have no one to talk to
I mostly struggle with anxiety and panic attacks. It’s just my anxiety gets so overwhelming and I go into that panic mode. I’m only 15 and it really scares me and I need to get help but I don’t want my parents getting mad at me .. because the last time I told them they thought I did it for attention. But it effects my daily life and I’m constantly worrying about everything.
When my anxiety gets really bad I start to dissociate, last two days it’s been more frequent, especially when I’m outside. It’s gotten a lot better since 2 months ago from eating better, vitamins. Im gonna start CBC oil for my anxiety.
@@nottobecompared4099 hey, I actually went on ashwagandha and began taking magnesium vitamins (known to help dissociative symptoms) both of these helped so much! Ashwagandha helped treat my anxiety which was causing a lot of dissociative symptoms! :)
i lived with PTSD + when my insomnia kicked up + high anxiety, i literally lost days. i remb turning up to therapy (was going 3 times a week at this point) + on my 3rd day visiting that week, i didn't realise that was my 3rd day, i was in a state. years on, i still live with anxiety but i'm tuned into my body/mind + know when i'm kicking off. however, if i am in a situation that triggers an anxiety attack, my body/mind shuts off + i go into autodrive + find a quiet place.
For me, and probably for most people with anxiety, the description of "anxiety" didn't do it justice. Anxiety is pretty intense. When I was in high school I had this constant, unrelenting social anxiety. I think it is more prevalent among high school students than we know. I don't know if mine has gotten better, or if I have gotten comfortable living without people.
damn. i have had countless panic attacks and i cant remember anything before or after for 30min. i honestly thought it was the attack itself but now it makes so much more sense :)
I'm just breaking into realizing I have dissociation. Took me years to stop dissociating to the point I didn't even realize I have it. I just thought I was getting sleepy in front of people. People always asked why I went to bed so early. I was dissociating in it is why.
I'm currently going through it after a vsauce video triggered it and Im on the 6th day of feeling not real and when I look in the mirror it feels like I'm the reflection. I feel like I'm lost in a sprawling metropolis of fakery and i cant find the right road to lead me back into the real. I'm hoping I get back to normal within the next couple days but at the moment I'll guess I'll just have to pick a card and deal with it
I have found through my experience that panic attacks DON'T come out of nowhere. There is always a series of triggers beforehand that we don't always recognize. My triggers are big, upcoming events, fast-paced environments, too much caffeine, not enough sleep, loud noises, other people touching me unexpectedly, tests, being manic, not having enough to do, and, most of all, having urge urinary incontinence because I'm only 25 years old. Now that I have recognized my triggers, I can usually deal with them before they turn into a panic attack.
I used to have up to around 10 panic attacks or more in a week up until a few weeks ago. I was living abroad and school was killing me. I struggle with depression, anxiety and suicidal ideation, and possibly PTSD caused by multiple (non related) traumatic events. Starting therapy soon (hopefully within a month and a half) at least my panic attacks drastically decreased by using propranolol prescribed by my family doctor and because I’m on summer break so no stress from school.
I always like when you say, “Welcome!” It always feels bubbly and, well, welcoming! I and countless others appreciate what you’re doing here. My anxiety tends to manifest and process in other ways. Panic attacks are a bit more representative of me, particularly nowadays. Interestingly, I had my periods of dissociative fog around the same time as when I had my first panic attacks - early high school. Fortunately, I can count my total panic attacks on 2 hands and I don’t have feelings of dissociation these days aside from varying levels of disconnect from my body that are normal for being a sometimes heady person.
Yes! Derealization makes me feel like a robot with human memories and everything feels like a simulation , dream or TV show. Languages that I know feel numb and unfamiliar even tho I completely understand them. People seem like NPCs or just like a weird addition to my reality. Objects seem too blurry or too clear. The shapes and principles on very simple objects can feel weird to me. Everything feels like it doesn't have a logical explanation even tho it does. It is 10% consciousness for me. Idk how can I get out of it because it is constant without short episodes of feeling normal
I don't remember to ever have a panic attack, if I did it was a rare event. I just deal with a constant state of dissociation since ever. More than twenty years of overwhelming anxiety and dissociation. I came to this video because I was wonder how is it that I am so anxious and I never had a panic attack. And I was thinking they don't occur together.
This makes sooo much sense. You really explained it well and being out of the comfusion of not knowing why I dissociate when I'm overlt anxious or having a panic attack is relieving. Thanks Katie.
Another great video Kati. I have had it happen to me twice because I suffer from anxiety. It is weird, it was like I am watching myself do things from within my own body.
As a child I dissociated a lot due to severe sibling abuse. After my daughter was born, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression and I disociated so much that I don't remember anything for the first 3 months after my daughter's birth. Then while I was getting therapy for my PPD, I started getting panic attacks a lot. These days I mostly get panic attacks.
I suffer from panic attacks and have had clear dissociation experiences, like the out of body watching yourself thing, but the other day I had an experience and I'm not sure if it's dissociation: I've just got a new boyfriend and I'm happy about it, but when we are physical/intimate together I feel like I'm not me, it's not the out of body experience and I am aware of what's happening and can remember it afterwards, I just get the feeling like it's another me in those situations, as if my real me can't handle such intimate interactions. Can someone tell me if this is dissociation or if not what it is, it kinda scares me.
Huh.... this explains a lot :/ There was this really stressful situation which I couldn't and didn't want to avoid... just face it head on. Happened three times. On the first one, I had a massive panic attack, almost passed out and it was horrible. Second time, the same happened, though not as rough as before (still, horrible). Third time... I somewhat went "off". My own surrounding didn't affect me, everything felt so false and...foggy? As if I weren't really there or inside my own body or the whole situation wasn't really happening. I couldn't even feel (emotionally) anything.
it feels like complete normality and then a shift. like an actual shift in your vision! you feel disoriented, everything's foggy, your thoughts are mixed up, you feel like you're about to faint and then your heart just POUNDS and POUNDS and POUNDS. you feel like you're going to have a seizure and you need to keep moving and squirming or shaking or just anything and it's so terrifying and i hate it
I’m 15 years old. I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder. I have panic attacks about 1-2 times a week. I don’t know why it happens so often. But sometimes my panic attacks lead me to dissociate and I usually end up harming myself. I don’t get to see my new therapist for about 3 weeks and I’m scared because I’m severely depressed and it’s gotten to a point were I physically feel weighed down and no matter what good or inspirational things people tell me my mind flips things around on me and fills me with negative thoughts that become intrusive. I feel like I have more than depression but I’m not sure. I just hope someone knows what I’m talking about.
Two days ago i dissociated for my first time or at leats I've been able to identify the feeling and now today i felt so "not myself" and like i wasn't where i was sat or maybe that i shouldn't be there that it pained me forcing me to get even more anxious thankfully a call from my mom helped to bring me back. it seems she has a knack for knowing when im having troubles. I still can't help but feel a little out of it, though even now.
i feel like dissociation feels like when you get high but you’re not actually high. it’s so weird
Exactly!
YES it feels like that. Feels like I’m on acid & weed at the same time which I have done before and it wasn’t fun
YES
I think I have dissociation not just anxiety. I’ve heard someone else who has it say it was like being drunk but without the fun tipsy part. Personality, I know I don’t feel sober, I feel “off” but yeah.
Yesss
I've dealt with anxiety my whole life and more recently have struggled with derealization. I definitely feel like I have little to no memory of years of my life because of this. To whomever reads this and relates, you're not alone. ❤️
How are you now?
@@thc7865To be honest, some days are harder than others but overall my anxiety has become a lot more manageable with the aid of CBT therapy and medication :) Thank you for asking 💜
queen
You're amazing 💕
:( it’s getting really bad for me
When I feel at the worst with my anxiety it feels like I’m watching my life instead of living it.
Ar C Exactly.
Is it from fear of feeling certain stuff. I just felt dissociation
@@w6636 yeah
Same! I’ve been in that state for years now.
@@PeteS_1994 What is the difference between Dissociation and Derealization?
Atleast for me, disassociation attacks are much different and so much more scary than normal panic attacks. I can normally feel a panic attack coming on even for a few seconds before, like a huge wave coming, but for disassociation, I can be driving and all of a sudden I just feel completely empty inside and like I’m in a dream, despite nothing setting me off. PTSD is a freaking monster.
I definitely feel like lately I've been feeling disassociation when I sit down and am not doing nothing, things feel weird and don't feel real. It only happens when I sit down and don't do anything though, when it happens I don't believe things around me and i feel like I could get up, walk around and nobody would react or notice
Maybe it only happens when you sit down because otherwise you are distracting yourself enough?? Just an idea.. but I do know that working through any trauma or upset we have struggled with can make the dissociation go away :) xoxo
Kati Morton thank you for replying, yeah that's what I've been thinking myself that when I'm up I'm busy and therefore distracting myself where as when I sit down I'm not distracting myself at all. I went to a counselor and they diagnosed me with OCPD but I stopped as it was making my job very difficult going there
Ryan True 😔 May u get & cont 2be well. :)
That's how it works for me too
I've been getting this recently and it seems to be when I am doing a lot of cooking at my parents house! At first I was scared, because I recognized the feeling as much like something I experience when high from pot almost, without the other effects. I didn't know if I was being exposed to something that was poisoning me or getting a lack of oxygen to the brain some how. It's happened again today and I just remained calm through it and just tried to ride it out but it took a while to stop happening. I am too embarrassed to tell my mother I was cooking with that I was doing through that, but my sense of time felt completely gone and I was spacing out constantly, I guess disconnected with everything.
I’m in a 24/7 state of dissociation. depersonalization and derealization. I’ve been like this for 7 years and have been diagnosed with ptsd. Sadly, it doesn’t help me cope with anything.
EmuEmi I’m very sorry, I hate it semi-permanently but not all the time so I really am sorry.
Need to change everything from diet exercise sleep.. try coconut oil vitamins minerals they helped me although I'm back to that Life again..
me too, sometimes its worse than others! I rarely have panic attacks though, i guess its because the disassociation "protects" me.....id rather have panic attacks
Watermelon Ludmilla Panic attack’s I can feel and I hate it, but believe when I dissociate is worse because I don’t notice. When I’m driving and dissociate it’s not safe because I don’t remember any part of the drive from point A to point B until I get there and like how did I get here.
Dpdr is 100% anxiety fueled by intrusive and negative thought patterns. Dissasocation is masking anxiety. I have both from abuse & making slow baby steps. Doesn't matter how long you have em there's people who had it 30 years and got over it in months (not to discredit you ik how hard it is). Yeah diets help and exercise etc to help distract and also build confidence but mainly it's going with the flow being in the now and eliminating ruminating intrusive thoughts. Shaun oconnor has a great program to help. Once you can make even the smallest of breakthroughs in DPDR you can start to consciously work thru trauma lil by lil . It's all about your mindset of wanting to get better and having patience. Recovery from anything. Drugs obesity depression abuse trauma. All takes time tender loving care. Tlc. Patience & willpower. It's never too late. you deserve to feel good again
I think I get dissociation most when I'm ignoring my anxious feelings. It's like my mind's way of saying, "HELLO! WE NEED TO DEAL WITH THIS! ... Oh, you don't want to? Okay, bye." *disconnects* When I'm focusing on my anxious feelings, they'll turn into a panic attack.
This is such an accurate way to describe this!
same with me
I find that I can bring myself to dissociation by thinking too much about my surroundings. I start thinking,”there’s a lot of people here... do I look weird? Can they tell I have anxiety? Am I going to pass out ? If I pass out who will take care of my kids?” It’s awful. I then dissociate
Thankyou for sharing. I had to leave work. Its so busy...I will try to focus on less things. Just one
exactly. it happens to me when i drive usually. "am i going to have a panic attack? if i do, then i might crash!" and that causes more of the feelings of having a panic attack. the brain is wild and scary :(
Andrew Noyes Exactly. I’m going through this same issue. It’s scary but I try to fight through it. I was in a car accident & had a few panic attacks after that to cause me to feel like this.
I go through this same issue.
this video has helped me understand who I am
Holly Seatter same it's useful
@@uncletomwhitelash5415 how are u now?
Sometimes I will disassociate & have a panic attack totally randomly. No trigger or warning; I just get shortness of breath, I can't move or feel my limbs, and I'll feel nauseous. It's absolutely strange and terrifying. I feel that even though I'm not currently thinking about stress, it's still there in my subconscious and it erupts every once in a while.
Same here :( it sucks
do you feel like paralyzed??
@@elnerito8639 I do ! I feel like I can’t move
@@sashawells6940 i feel it too
Same!!!!
I was doing a speech and I remembered being so stressed and anxious that my soul kind of escaped out of my body, I blanked out. I don’t remember the rest, I just ended up sitting on a chair.
This has happened to me!
i needed to see this, ive had severe panic attacks every day lately and disassociating all day and at this point i feel doomed and like i won’t make it through this, but it’s humbling to see that other people deal with this and i’m not alone.
Did u get out of it? Cuz I’m going through that right now and I wanna have hope it’ll end for me like it did for you
for me, dissociation is usually a major part of what i feel during a panic attack, but I find myself dissociating quite often during daily life regardless of whether or not I'm panicking. Not sure how it correlates with my anxiety levels as I have a hard time registering in the moment and processing later but it just kind of feels like I'm not stressed out or nervous but just watching myself be a person from afar as opposed to living in my body as I interact with others, work, etc.
my anxiety is consistent and feels like its there 60% of the day never turns to a panic attack but constantly feeling nervous and uneasy.
: l
It's so interesting how many different ways anxiety presents. I've only had a panic attack once. Usually, my anxiety just presents with insomnia, loss of appetite or nervous ticks like tearing at my nails. Those are the only outward signs anyway. Most people probably wouldn't know I'm anxious. I know other people who have a completely different set of symptoms. It seems that is often why mental health issues are so hard for people to relate to.
I have DP/DR and it definitely kicks in when I’m anxious. Panic attacks seem to go hand in hand with my dissociation episodes.
Thank you for sharing your experience :) It's so helpful! xoxo
Great timing. I haven't had disassociation for a few years but it started again a few days ago. My anxiety has been super high recently and I am not really sure why.
I am so sorry you are struggling right now, but I am glad this video was helpful!! xox
So has mine! I think I've had dissocation for three years though and I don't know what to do.
@@elainasmith1700 and Sarah Whitelam, do you guys wanna like talk about it? ive had disassociation for 8 months now with no breaks.. Could really be helpful to talk to someone more experienced..
Elias Kjærsgård how are you now? Recovered?
The idea that dissociation can come out of nowhere from being overwhelmed just like panic attacks makes so much sense to me. I thought I couldn't be disassociating because when have in the past it is not in situations that are particularly stressful. But I have Autism and GAD so I can get overwhelmed easily from just basic stimulous. I'll seemingly be fuctioning "normally" one second then suddenly be unable to make even the most basic of decisions or take simple actions.
I have constant dissociation like I’m always disconnected and detached from reality in this constant dream state and I can’t bring myself back :( I haven’t felt anxious as much because it’s the summer holidays and no exams yet I still am so not here
Amber Wood she has videos on dissociation, it gets better love
Amber Wood this comment is like so relatable I feel like if you didn’t write it I would have, almost word for word!
aglover360 thanks and I hope so, it’s been constant for almost 2 years :( x
I have some videos on dissociation, as well as grounding techniques (what can help to bring you back) check those out and I hope they help! xoxo
me too. wouldn't wish this feeling on my worst enemies
Ive been diagnosed with general anxiety. When I was younger, I used to have panic attacks all the time, back then I was still living with or seeing my abusive mother. Lately, since I’ve cut ties with her especially, I happen to dissociate much more and have far less panic attacks. The strange thing to me is that I also dissociate in happy times. Like, if I’m expecting a big event, like a concert of a band I love or a big trip I had been planning for months, I will dissociate.
I swear I felt like I was going crazy cause I felt emotionally numb most of the time. It’s only until watching videos about dissociation that all of this feeling like I’m losing track of time and questioning reality that it’s because of dissociation. I really think I might need therapy.
Sometimes when my anxiety is really bad it feels like I'm completely numb and not.. there? It's so hard to try to describe the feeling I have. It's like I'm floating through life, I'll have trouble concentrating on anything, I'll forget what was said in a conversation that I just had. I don't really have panic attacks but I feel like this quite often. I'm really glad I watched this because I wasn't sure if what I felt had a name. Thank you 💖
I’ve been dissociated for so long that I don’t even remember what it feels like to feel normal anymore, the reason why I know I’m still dissociated at all is because I remember how weird and distressed it made me when it first started happening, and I’ve never experienced any feeling of going back, even though I can’t remember what it felt like before. I also have weird moments every now and then when it basically feels like reality punches me in the face and suddenly everything is super loud and clear and crisp and immediate and detailed and it feels so overwhelmingly strange like I don’t even know what’s going on, usually triggered by looking at my face in a mirror too long or suddenly being too aware of my own voice, but it doesn’t last long at all and everything will kinda fuzz out.
I mostly feel like I don’t really inhibit this world, I’m just something deep inside of my head and my body isn’t really me or connected to me, I’m just inside my head looking through my eyes. It’s hard to describe. Even when I talk it doesn’t really feel like I’m talking most of the time, just my mouth rambling on it’s own, even if “it’s” saying things that I’m thinking about. Sometimes I go so far out that I somehow feel disconnected from my own thoughts and I don’t even know what I was just thinking and I don’t feel like I exist at all, like I’m nothing and there is nothing. I also don’t feel anything when I’m like that, not even boredom. I could stare at a wall for three hours and it would make no difference. Usually though I’m just in a place where i feel mostly numb and the only thing that comes through are strong emotions like anxiety(all the time) and an awful sense of hopelessness. My days go by in a blur and all my memories are as if in third person. As well as being hazy and unclear. It’s made my memory and attention span terrible. But like I said before, hard to explain, and this is just the tip of the iceberg lmao. It’s been this way for years now.
I am so happy you made this video because I have anxiety and I spent the majority of my 20s feeling like I have just been out of my body and I never understood why. This really helped me to understand myself more. Thank you so so much!!
Yay! I am glad it was helpful for you!! xoxo
I am so glad you made this video. 10 years ago I suffered such severe anxiety that I went through BOTH Depersonalization and Derealization. Beginning of May I developed depression that followed with anxiety. And I’m back to the Derealization. I feel like I’m on autopilot sometimes and i keep obsessing with thoughts like “what did I just do 10 seconds ago?” It’s a very odd feeling and I wouldn’t wish it on my worse enemy ! Going to group therapy has helped me a bit
I'm more prone to panic attacks than dissociation, but in looking back, I think dissociation has happened at times when I was really vulnerable or had the potential for a bad panic attack (most frequently this in the grocery store, or occasionally when out with friends and plans are changing too fast for me to handle).
In this crazy world, emotional intelligence is more important than ever. You are a bright light in a dark place!
My worst day with anxiety, I had two full blown panic attacks in a row, and then a bunch of small ones after that. And the only way my brain could stop the panic, was by dissociation. There was a lot of stuff that went into that day being rough, and I'm still processing it in therapy. Also, this video helps a lot because I often feel like I can either dissociate, or have anxiety.
I've never heard of dissociation, but in the past, I have struggled with panic attacks. This is really interesting to know how different peoples' anxiety plays out. I'm really glad someone is talking about anxiety and it's causes on UA-cam because I know causes because I've talked to my doctor, but so many people are kind of confused about what anxiety truly is
Its so hard to be a man with panic attacks, because im always supposed to be calm, collected, confident, and in control. I hste this shit but little by little i get better thanks Kati!!!
I needed this so much, a lot of times when I had panic attacks I was forgetting everything and even that I was anxious, sometimes I couldn't even remember that I had a panic attack and what happened during that time
Thank you for sharing your experience :) And I am SO glad that the video was helpful!! xoxo
i dont get how the brain is "protecting itself" during anxiety or depression with derealization because when i start getting derealization and feeling detached like that i start freeking out and my panic gets even worse! deffinitley doesnt seem like anything is protecting itself
this was really interesting! I've always wondered why I was surprisingly "good" at presentations in school despite struggling quite a bit with anxiety, I knew I was dissociating during them but I never understood why that happened. I'd be nauseous and shaking before the presentation, probably after an all-nighter, but then when it was go time my brain just kind of went into autopilot and ran the script while I "watched". never knew this was actually this ripcord situation rather than random "convenient" (if uncomfortable) mental absence.
thank you, I learned something about myself today!
I am severely depressed at the moment. One of my best friends just stabbed himself in the arm because his girlfriend broke up with him. He sent me pictures and everything. This led to a major panic attack and a passed out from hallucination. I feel really overwhelmed. I feel that you are the only person I can trust now. I might not have been alive without you x
The first time I felt dissociation I was 11. It lasted 3 days, and I was scared to tell anyone what I was feeling because it was so hard to explain. I prayed to God to make me "forget" these episodes...I did..but it came back with a vengeance in my 20s..😔
Omg Kati you nailed it, that was me this last week, one dissociation attack follow by 3 panic attacks. Been ok last few days though.
I have anxiety attacks. Once I calm down from an attack I often feel myself dissociating. It’s like my brain knows that I can keep breaking down, but I still can’t escape the anxiety so my brain sort of shuts down for a while until I can come back to baseline. This can take a long time though. Trying to pull myself out of dissociation is almost enough to send me back into an anxiety attack...
Is everything the same for me as you are now?
What you say makes sense. I always had trouble with dissociation. Once I started learning about it and paying attention I noticed that I would dissociate when I felt overwhelmed from PTSD. Sometimes it would happen so quickly I wouldn't have a chance to even notice it happening. I think it was my body's way of keeping from having a panic attack since I rarely had those. But the anxiety was always there before dissociating. Sometimes I'll still dissociate and it's always when I'm worried about something or my energy is taxed.
Ryan Liberty / Mental Health Exactly. I feel the same.
I have this! :’( omg sometime I lose it and feel like I’m not even here when I’m having a panic attack! I hope you know what I mean! I feel so happy I found you through Shane! I’m literally crying because you’re a God sent to me! Have you Kati! ❤️
I didn't even know the word for that feeling before this video! I get both panic attacks and dissociation. Now I know both stem from my anxiety. Thank you for enlightening me!
Dissociative State feels like your spirit or soul is desperately trying to get out of the body to escape physical panic attack symptoms....when the state of panic lingers then subsides....you still feel outside yourself.
Mindfulness anchors me when dissociation happens to me. Tapping into intuition helps too. Its scary sometimes though.
I had a terrible trauma triggered panic attack this morning.. And now I'm feeling really separated from my emotions. I dont know what I'm feeling or thinking and everything around me feels funny. I needed this video.
Is everything the same for me as you are now?
What if it’s the other way around I feel like I’m dissociating all the time like every day, and me feeling this way leads to panic attacks and lots of negative thoughts ?? What are ways to cope with it or make it go away ?
Thanks to your videos I just had my first appointment with my therapist and it went well and now I feel like im starting to get in control of my life
Where’s this video been all my life? This explains what’s happening for me right now so well. I think it’s mostly dissociation but with some panic attacks when I’m feeling a little more grounded. Thank you so, so much 🙌🏻♥️
I am so glad it was helpful!!! I am sorry you're struggling with it, but hopefully some of my older videos about dissociation and panic attacks can help too!! xoxo
Kati Morton I’ve got them in a playlist thank though Kati 💖💖
I know I suffer more from intense dissociation. The only time I have had a (hyperphysical) panic attack was because I was in an intense argument that I was reacting to. I more often find myself separating and its honestly terrifying.
I'm going through a completely life changing time right now & i have had both panic attacks & dissociation. I just attended my first bpd support group last night. I really appreciate your videos kati, thank you !
Why can't more Therapists be as empathic as you are!!?
I'm currently in a situation where I am stuck and I need to move and change my job and home, but it takes a while.
I'm in this situation since January, walking back and forth, trying to find my place in the world...
I just needed to say, my therapist is really bad and I currently can't change that.
It's bad.
I know I'm just a stranger but I am rooting for your growth and wellness. I empathize with you, friend.
I wonder if I’m the only one who has dissociated so bad. I spectated out of my body and look at life as terrible and bland. I forget who I am, my own personality, I felt like I’d never get it back. i lost some spirituality and faith....but I realized our person it’s all inside what we value as people and why we love and are attracted to what we are attracted to already and to never change that. Soul? The Panic attacks are fear because I never want to loose myself or my values or my personality. I hope this is relatable or helpful to anybody
I’m gonna try real hard to explain what it feels like for me because it is wild, but yeah, you explained it really well. I often dissociate during or after a panic attack.
It’s really weird. Because my brain just like, idk, slows down? And my consciousness just gets pushed to the back of my head, and I’m just watching things happen through groggy eyes.
Is everything the same for me as you are now?
I don’t really have panic attacks but I do dissociate often.
Makes sense that I never remember why it happened in the first place, for me, it came out of nowhere.
I don’t like that state of mind, the atmosphere around me can get so weird and borderline creepy at times.
For a long time I thought I was just going crazy
Same thing is happening to me atm ..sucks .I had bad stress due to court then started to worry about it..n got panick attacks then felt disoriented. And more I think about having it worse it gets
Loved this video...I hadn't correlated panic and dissociation. I tend to go from anxiety to dissociation. They're both bad to live with, but at least with dissociation it feels like I'm in a glass box. A doll in a box...I can't feel anything and nothing can touch me...freaky, huh?
I deal with both and I think you're hypothesis is correct. There are times I do one or the other, both are dependent on my overall health and the circumstance to bring on that level of stress. Something traumatic usually will bring on dissociation and non-trauma usually panic.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience :) That is so incredibly helpful!! xoxo
menhit crow You girl said it well,me too!:(
ugh, Kati freaking Morton I just love you. I wish everyone understood how deeply my anxiety disorder affects me the way that you do. thank you so much xoxo
I have depersonalizations / déréalisation disorder because of my excessive anxiety. I am so happy that you made a video about this. Even though it doesn’t necessarily answer how to fix things, it’s just really comforting. So thanks Kati❤️
I struggle really bad with dissociation. I have dissociated for as long as a full month at a time. I would say 2 and a half years but I had short spurts of reality during those times where I was back in control and can fully remember those times. I’ve been having this problem for so long I can’t figure out when it’s happening or how to stop it. Just recently I have been researching my C-PTSD more and I came across the channel Post Traumatic Victory. Fantastic channel. The woman who Volgs her life and shares stories, experiences, and advice that I find pretty helpful and it has helped me to notice every now and then when I’m dissociative or when I have just come back to reality. I’m not sure how to properly say that so “coming to reality” is the best way I can explain it. It truly ruins my life sometimes. I live with my partner and she gets frustrated with me, but tries to be understanding, when I don’t remember ever having a conversation with her or even remembering I ever said something. She will remind me that I need to take clean dishes out of the dishwasher or bring something into the apartment from the car and I will not even remember ever having the conversation. My brain blocks out a lot of things and it causes me to be very unproductive and upset because I want to do things but I can’t. My social anxiety is ridiculous. I want to go to the store and just be normal. I literally just want to go get a gallon of milk but something so simple and quick ends up a horrendous mess because I can not handle it. Something so simple as getting the mail from the mailbox just won’t happen. I can walk half way to the door and freeze in fear. And I won’t go outside, my body tells me I can’t, I won’t. And I try to push through it but it just won’t do for me. My mind says “Screw your mailbox trip that isn’t even a big deal. You’re not going outside. Someone will see you. You’re home alone so if someone notices that they’re going to come hurt you in your home. You’re not safe. Don’t be seen. Don’t go outside. Don’t let anyone know you’re here.”...... I can’t afford health insurance. I can’t even afford a new car much less to even fix the one I have now. I want to badly to be able to get the help I need and try to fix what is broken in my mind and mend the hurt and pain that someone else caused but I don’t have the means to do so. I find it very hard to even get out of bed most of the time but I push myself really hard so that one day I won’t forget that I even got out of bed in the morning. One day I won’t have to try to remember that I was supposed to feed and water my cat 6 hours before and worry that I didn’t and she’ll be hungry all day until I get home from work. One day I’ll just know. One day I’ll remember and thank myself for getting the help I needed to learn how to teach my body’s natural response system that it’s ok, I’m ok, everything is ok and no one is going to hurt me again.
I've been disociating lately and this honestly really helped
I had a derealization episode last night when I was at the gym. I was on the elliptical, and all of the sudden, the environment felt very different and my head felt like this sort of fog and nothing around me seemed like it was before. It felt like everything was 2 dimensional and hollow. I usually wait it out and it goes away after 20 mins or an hour. But then I got another episode when I got home and my eyes started to hurt and every time I'd read something, I'd feel dizzy and it felt like I was in a weird bubble that was disconnected from everything around me. And like you said, it happened out of no where.
Thanks so much for posting and for inviting Comments. I'm sure this is very helpful to many people!
It actually happens a lot to me. Like, when I'm feeling anxious I have a panic attack if it's something really serious, that really bothers me, and then I dissociate and I can't feel what's real or not real anymore. But dissociation has always happened to me, even when I was little and I didn't know what it was! I always wondered if what I was living was real, and after so many years realizing what it is was so satisfying. But also it got me worried because it's really serious. So yeah these two things are always kinda related but I can be anxious and dissociate without having a panic attack. It really depends on the matter. But dissociation... I think that's always there.
I have had many light feelings over dissociation out of no where but I have had only just eight severe dissociation attack things where I was crying and shaking and screaming ...
Me too
I agree. If your brain cant deal with the anger angst frustration or whatever. Instead of lashing out. It turns into feeling nothing at all. Numb. And you begin to dissosiate. Used to happen to me all the time in my teens. I think my nervous system was so sensitive to my outer surrounding. Loud sounds, high voices, etc. So my body just shut down to protect itself. It hasnt happened since i started with SSRI. The medication kind of gives me a thicker layer to protect my senses.
I used to find dissociation scary but now that I know my symptoms and anxiety I find dissociation useful and pleasant.
i had my first panic attack 3 weeks ago. i thought that I was having a heart attack/dying. since then I have been to a doctor to get a blood test and an ECG and they both came back completely fine. last night I felt extremely dizzy and had the most terrifying panic attack. for me, i feel my heart beating fast, shortness of breath and a sensation that feels like the drop on a rollercoaster or when somebody startles you. i ended up calling an ambulance last night and went to hospital, everything was fine but today has been so draining. i just want this to stop :(
Good explanation! I tend to dissociate rather than have panic attacks. But I have had both in the past. When I dissociate I tend to get body memories too, those aren't very fun at all. I try to do grounding techniques when these happen, not always successful.
This is a tricky one for me because often I'm just dissociating anyway from tired, the weather, change etc etc which numbs the anxiety, but other times I do end up having a panic attack and I feel the moment I start dissociating and all the anxiety suddenly vanishes to nothing
This video came out at a spooky timing for me. When I was in high school (which wasn't long ago) I would have lots of panic attacks, I'd still be very out of it and daydreamy but for the past few months I've been feeling a different kind of spaced out, felt it before but not like this. This video was real helpful, thank you
I struggle mostly with panic attacks, Earlier this year I had two panic attacks back to back. A huge one when I was relaxing at home after long day at work and a small one when i was at work. It really freaked me out
I don’t know exactly what it is for me but when I get overwhelmed about things that I can’t change, or feel like I have no control over myself and my life I feel like I’m not there (I could stare at the ceiling and feel like I’m not there) and at the same time wishing I could unplug my mind so I could rest from that feeling of anguish.
Hi Kati, to answer your question, I’ve never had a panic attack, but anxiety has been for me a dissociation source for...almost all my life.! I still get frustrated when, when I feel just a tiny bit uncomfortable with someone or a situation, even for a few seconds, I’ll feel dissociated for the rest of the day, sometimes the week.
Terapy has certainly helped, since I get in better touch with my feelings, concerns, etc, and my brain feels more at ease with them now!
Thanks for your videos!
My dissociation is becoming bad and I feel like I’m losing all my good days to it. I can’t control it anymore and sometimes I have such a hard time coming back to reality. It’s horrible.
How you feeling now?
@@ttyke759 I’ve gotten a lot better now. It comes and goes but it’s definitely not as bad as it used to be. Thank you for asking :)
@@user-ig6yb5qw5v hey would you mind telling me how you got over this ?
@@brittanyaw2171 I really wish I could give you a proper answer but I really just started paying more attention to myself and practiced healing more than dwelling on trauma. A lot of my disassociation began at an early age Bc of a fucked up childhood but once I learned how to heal and let go of what was hurting me so badly I eventually got out of that hole. I know it may seem like an never ending loop right now and you might feel so numb but it will get better, I promise.
@@brittanyaw2171 You Can message me anytime if you just need someone to vent or talk to !
You always know the perfect time, and topic to upload. It’s 3am in aus and this is so on point right now.
Thank you for everything you do. I love your heart!
Yay! So glad I could help :) xoxo
What if you don't really have dissociation but you're constantly worried about having it, so it makes you anxious and start to look for it🤷♂️. Then freak yourself out 🙄
I don't think I still understand Dissociation. Sometimes, when I'm feeling stressed, I feel dizzy and tired. I feel like I'm floating and I can't see straight or focus on vision on things. Everything gets blurry like I'm suddenly drunk.
Is that dissociation? Like a physical sensation like that?
Yes, I dissociate, and feel as you describe above.
That, or in my case, I also feel like everything is... not really there. Or not really happening, as in a dream or movie. I become unable to have any kind of real emotional response, even my own body feels weird.
Yes, everything feel detached and weird .... at times like those I wonder if I even exist or if I am making it all up. It is very draining and exhausting to deal with those feelings.
Felipe Revuelta Everyones experience with dissociation is pretty subjective, but it always feel like you're detached from reality. So, you COULD be experiencing dissociation, but you're going to have to think about it yourself. If it feels like you're detached from reality, you have dissociation.
I get very clumsy and dizzy. It really feels like my consciousness shrinks. It feels like my body carries me on its own instead of me controlling my body. My memory of when I dissociate is very bright and blurry, like I can't make out faces or details.
Just started therapy 2 months ago and it has sent my anxiety into a tailspin. I have always lost chunks of my day and its bothered me but its not like something that was in my way. Its gotten so much worse and I feel like I have no one to talk to
I have felt the same way.That's a good way to explain what it feels like.Amen.
I mostly struggle with anxiety and panic attacks. It’s just my anxiety gets so overwhelming and I go into that panic mode. I’m only 15 and it really scares me and I need to get help but I don’t want my parents getting mad at me .. because the last time I told them they thought I did it for attention. But it effects my daily life and I’m constantly worrying about everything.
When my anxiety gets really bad I start to dissociate, last two days it’s been more frequent, especially when I’m outside. It’s gotten a lot better since 2 months ago from eating better, vitamins. Im gonna start CBC oil for my anxiety.
Jaspreet Dhaliwal How was the cbd oil? Was it beneficial?
@@nottobecompared4099 hey, I actually went on ashwagandha and began taking magnesium vitamins (known to help dissociative symptoms) both of these helped so much! Ashwagandha helped treat my anxiety which was causing a lot of dissociative symptoms! :)
i lived with PTSD + when my insomnia kicked up + high anxiety, i literally lost days. i remb turning up to therapy (was going 3 times a week at this point) + on my 3rd day visiting that week, i didn't realise that was my 3rd day, i was in a state. years on, i still live with anxiety but i'm tuned into my body/mind + know when i'm kicking off. however, if i am in a situation that triggers an anxiety attack, my body/mind shuts off + i go into autodrive + find a quiet place.
For me, and probably for most people with anxiety, the description of "anxiety" didn't do it justice. Anxiety is pretty intense. When I was in high school I had this constant, unrelenting social anxiety. I think it is more prevalent among high school students than we know. I don't know if mine has gotten better, or if I have gotten comfortable living without people.
damn. i have had countless panic attacks and i cant remember anything before or after for 30min. i honestly thought it was the attack itself but now it makes so much more sense :)
I'm just breaking into realizing I have dissociation. Took me years to stop dissociating to the point I didn't even realize I have it. I just thought I was getting sleepy in front of people. People always asked why I went to bed so early. I was dissociating in it is why.
I feel so lost. I'm trying to exercise the anxiety away in hopes I can prevent a panic attack
I'm currently going through it after a vsauce video triggered it and Im on the 6th day of feeling not real and when I look in the mirror it feels like I'm the reflection. I feel like I'm lost in a sprawling metropolis of fakery and i cant find the right road to lead me back into the real. I'm hoping I get back to normal within the next couple days but at the moment I'll guess I'll just have to pick a card and deal with it
I have found through my experience that panic attacks DON'T come out of nowhere. There is always a series of triggers beforehand that we don't always recognize. My triggers are big, upcoming events, fast-paced environments, too much caffeine, not enough sleep, loud noises, other people touching me unexpectedly, tests, being manic, not having enough to do, and, most of all, having urge urinary incontinence because I'm only 25 years old. Now that I have recognized my triggers, I can usually deal with them before they turn into a panic attack.
I used to have up to around 10 panic attacks or more in a week up until a few weeks ago. I was living abroad and school was killing me. I struggle with depression, anxiety and suicidal ideation, and possibly PTSD caused by multiple (non related) traumatic events. Starting therapy soon (hopefully within a month and a half) at least my panic attacks drastically decreased by using propranolol prescribed by my family doctor and because I’m on summer break so no stress from school.
I always like when you say, “Welcome!” It always feels bubbly and, well, welcoming! I and countless others appreciate what you’re doing here.
My anxiety tends to manifest and process in other ways. Panic attacks are a bit more representative of me, particularly nowadays. Interestingly, I had my periods of dissociative fog around the same time as when I had my first panic attacks - early high school. Fortunately, I can count my total panic attacks on 2 hands and I don’t have feelings of dissociation these days aside from varying levels of disconnect from my body that are normal for being a sometimes heady person.
I love they way you talk about this. You make it sound like a manageable problem, not like a reality. ❤️
Yes! Derealization makes me feel like a robot with human memories and everything feels like a simulation , dream or TV show. Languages that I know feel numb and unfamiliar even tho I completely understand them. People seem like NPCs or just like a weird addition to my reality. Objects seem too blurry or too clear. The shapes and principles on very simple objects can feel weird to me. Everything feels like it doesn't have a logical explanation even tho it does. It is 10% consciousness for me. Idk how can I get out of it because it is constant without short episodes of feeling normal
I want you to be my therapist! Ugh I love you
I don't remember to ever have a panic attack, if I did it was a rare event. I just deal with a constant state of dissociation since ever. More than twenty years of overwhelming anxiety and dissociation. I came to this video because I was wonder how is it that I am so anxious and I never had a panic attack. And I was thinking they don't occur together.
This makes sooo much sense. You really explained it well and being out of the comfusion of not knowing why I dissociate when I'm overlt anxious or having a panic attack is relieving. Thanks Katie.
Another great video Kati. I have had it happen to me twice because I suffer from anxiety. It is weird, it was like I am watching myself do things from within my own body.
As a child I dissociated a lot due to severe sibling abuse. After my daughter was born, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression and I disociated so much that I don't remember anything for the first 3 months after my daughter's birth. Then while I was getting therapy for my PPD, I started getting panic attacks a lot. These days I mostly get panic attacks.
I suffer from panic attacks and have had clear dissociation experiences, like the out of body watching yourself thing, but the other day I had an experience and I'm not sure if it's dissociation:
I've just got a new boyfriend and I'm happy about it, but when we are physical/intimate together I feel like I'm not me, it's not the out of body experience and I am aware of what's happening and can remember it afterwards, I just get the feeling like it's another me in those situations, as if my real me can't handle such intimate interactions.
Can someone tell me if this is dissociation or if not what it is, it kinda scares me.
Huh.... this explains a lot :/
There was this really stressful situation which I couldn't and didn't want to avoid... just face it head on. Happened three times. On the first one, I had a massive panic attack, almost passed out and it was horrible. Second time, the same happened, though not as rough as before (still, horrible). Third time... I somewhat went "off". My own surrounding didn't affect me, everything felt so false and...foggy? As if I weren't really there or inside my own body or the whole situation wasn't really happening. I couldn't even feel (emotionally) anything.
Is everything the same for me as you are now?
@@alhamdulillah...222 Sorry, can you word that differently?
@@SaxraAranae are you cured?
@@SaxraAranae have you completely derealized?
I've been experiencing this for about 5 months. I couldn't believe it. I could see myself floating in the corner of my room looking down at myself.
it feels like complete normality and then a shift. like an actual shift in your vision! you feel disoriented, everything's foggy, your thoughts are mixed up, you feel like you're about to faint and then your heart just POUNDS and POUNDS and POUNDS. you feel like you're going to have a seizure and you need to keep moving and squirming or shaking or just anything and it's so terrifying and i hate it
I’m 15 years old. I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder. I have panic attacks about 1-2 times a week. I don’t know why it happens so often. But sometimes my panic attacks lead me to dissociate and I usually end up harming myself. I don’t get to see my new therapist for about 3 weeks and I’m scared because I’m severely depressed and it’s gotten to a point were I physically feel weighed down and no matter what good or inspirational things people tell me my mind flips things around on me and fills me with negative thoughts that become intrusive. I feel like I have more than depression but I’m not sure. I just hope someone knows what I’m talking about.
I’m so happy I’m not alone. We will get through this..I love you❤️
Nisha Jo Yes.
Two days ago i dissociated for my first time or at leats I've been able to identify the feeling and now today i felt so "not myself" and like i wasn't where i was sat or maybe that i shouldn't be there that it pained me forcing me to get even more anxious thankfully a call from my mom helped to bring me back. it seems she has a knack for knowing when im having troubles. I still can't help but feel a little out of it, though even now.