Life after two abortions (1 year later)
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- Опубліковано 24 лип 2022
- I had my first abortion in June 2021. I had another one in October 2021. It’s been nearly a year since my second pregnancy, so I wanted to share how my life has been going. Spoiler alert: I don’t regret them.
Resources:
• www.ineedana.com - if you need an abortion but don’t know where to get one
• your local Planned Parenthood - they don’t perform abortions at every location, but they can confirm your pregnancy and share resources whether you decide to parent, abort, or adopt
• / abortion - a great resource to anonymously share what you’re going through and to see what other women have shared, and gather more resources
• / regretfulparents - if you are a parent or step-parent and regret any aspect of having a child
Elle Abortion is not birth control!
😂
why not?
Super excited to listen to your podcast!! I very much enjoy watching your videos and love hearing your perspective on things😊 also i laughed when you said you think you talk too much cause I swear I could listen to you talk all day!! Also i''m SOO happy you've found a therapist that works for you! I know all I know about you is what you decide to tell us people of the internet, but seriously I think you're so freaking cool! I'm only a few years younger than you (I'm 20 years old) however I look up to you as a STRONG woman figure, I feel like Im always learning something new that benefits me in my life when listening to your thoughts and feelings on things and catching us followers up on your life and all, it feels like a friendly chit chat that I've been LONGING for! Anyway I hope to see you post again soon and I'm wishing you all the love and support!! 🥰❤
Hi Caitlyn , I'm George 😊 . I'm also a Virgo (thus i.e. maiden/damsel too 😉😀😘) .
You say you could listen to her all day 😋. I'm like that too ☺️ .
I like to talk (important stuff, but mostly interesting and fun stuff, from the Day to Day, like în the girly chit-chats 😀 ) and tell al the details and be told all the details when I'm beeing told real stories 😋.
Thus, does your pleasure to listen also apply to boys/young men and it depends on the person it you also like the chit-chat or the nice chit-chat make you also like the person 😋😉 ?
Or do you consider that such chit-chats are too girly and only for girls and you fel only disgusted by the boys/young men that are that way 🤔 ???
I'm also a hopeless and endless romantic, VERY protective, ABSOLUTELY ADORE cuddle (cuddle night instead of party night ALL DAY EVERY DAY 😀), VERY chivalrous, VERY loving and afectionate , VERY caring ,like to tell my thoughts what they mean and where there come from etc .
I like to call all this traits my small GIRL part 😀😎😊😉😘. You could also call it my virgin GIRL/maiden/lady parts (Lol, that sounded weird 😂) .
Silo what are your answers 😇😘 ?
Also, would you like to talk 😊😉😘😘😘 ?
I never wanted kids. I never felt maternal. I got married at 35. At 37 I thought “what if I’m missing out on something?” I had a baby at 38. I’m so glad I did. I am maternal after all. All that to say, no way in hell would I have wanted children in my 20s or early 30s. I needed that option to be there in case things went wrong. I was able to finish graduate school and make a life for myself. I had a baby with the most amazing guy. That would not have been the case earlier in my life.
Stay strong.
"I needed that option to be there" ... what kind of message is that? You're not too weak to bare and raise children AND get that degree. Don't believe that lie. You may be delayed, but it isn't impossible. It's no longer about you once you become pregnant. But guess what else is true too? Your life is not over, either! Consenting, grown women handle their business and make it work regardless. I I I, myself myself....that's all i'm seeing/reading.
Good for you creamy 👍
@@9290SC Yeah ok. Take your religious zealot crap somewhere else. 👍🏼
I waited until I was done graduate school and in my career too, and I'm so glad I did! There's nothing wrong with waiting a bit to plan a family.
@@9290SC "I, I, myself, myself... that's all I'm seeing/reading"
Wow what wild concept that a person would think about THEMSELF and THEIR LIFE! How dare they?
Honest to god, I'm curious, if a person shouldn't be thinking about themself and what is best for them, who should they be thinking about? Are we all supposed to be just passive beings that cater to the needs of everyone else? Are we not allowed to think and decide what's best for us?
You’ve come a long way since I first started watching your journey… keep up your counseling, She sounds like a good fit for this time in your life.btw you’ve turned into a beautiful woman with a great smile…
Exactly. I just found this channel and was enjoying your self discovery. Praying for your peace, then I saw this second abortion. Very careless. Keep in mind nothing is 100%. Best wishes to you. However, I can not stay around to watch this happen over and over. It actually pains me for reasons I won’t discuss online. Bless you though.
I love listening to you Elle and I'm so glad to hear that you are so happy now. Thanks for sharing all those deliberations. I don't believe that you mentioned that prior to that first pregnancy and especially as you were growing up you never had a maternal desire, or dreams. That is not common and I believe it says much about the direction you should continue on. It is another thing that makes you so special. I'm glad to hear that you now have a great therapist and that you've reached out to gather a bunch of friends. I look forward to future updates. Good luck with your studies and the podcast.
P.S. I was especially impressed when you said you considered the effect on your child if you were not in a stable place with your relationship and all that might lead to. As a preteen my future attitudes were set due to all the hate, distrust and arguments I witnessed before my parents finally separated.
yout talking "way too much" is such a mood and i could listen to you all evening
It is every womans right to decide weather to have children or not. Her body, her decision. But one really should behave responsibly whartcomes to sex and birth control. If one ends up having multiple abortions, something isnt right. Abortion shouldnt be used as a birth control.
True and this is what the pro choice community says.. We dont use abortion as birth control, that is a myth, but it isn't really a myth when you see so many people just like this having one abortion after the other.. and even just months apart.
She doesn't care
Ok her body her choice but nobody is talking about the baby in the woman's body. That babies body isn't the woman's body it's its own person, adoption is also a option not just abortion
I'm happy you are doing well. Much love to you.
Elle, I’m glad you are getting proper mental health care and in a better place. I am a lot older than you but I admire you. Early twenties can be a very difficult time for many people mental health wise (I know it was for me.) I’ve also had DBT and it really is amazing. Glad your degree is going well.
HI!!!!!😍💗😁 Glad you are back woohoo!
Lost my last pregnancy. Only had one premature barely alive birth out of 4.
Your boyfriend or I guess ex boyfriend doesn’t seem very bright at all.
I mean, they are young. They are learning and growing. At the age of 22, the brain is still learning such things as impulse control, rational thinking, emotional intelligence… some people never learn this.
Elle said she thinks that no-one should be judged on this. If she had abortion or give birth to 2 children in that age. It's not happen to you. How can you know all the facts.
Pregnancy happens.
Why blame the people for it.
She took heavy hormones to mot get pregnant.
That's also not so good.
Some young woman die because of the hormones for prevention.
Hopefully she brings her expierience to a good ending.
Because he left her after she aborted his children?
@@DanaAshlie No, it's because all through this he sounded like a child who couldn't keep his dick in his pants or at least protected. No responsibility for anything.
@@EmpressEllie that's exactly why you shouldn't transition if you're young. Even early 20s as you point out. Rational thinking and impulse control is not complete yet. Yet these kids wanna take hormones and have surgery to cut off bady parts. Perfect you brought this up. That's why you see so many detransitioners now, completely regretting and unhappy with their lives because they made these life altering decisions in whimsical periods.
I’m very glad to hear you’re feeling better. Having the right therapist is so helpful and crucial for getting the therapy we need. I hope things continue to go well for you.
You and your ex partner have been unbelievable careless. If he was willing to make you go through what you went through the first time he really isn't someone you should even be speaking to. Very selfish imo.
Yikes.
Both are imo
Literally. I have lost so much respect for her. Pro-choice or not you don’t fucking use abortion as birth control. Close your legs and have some self control. Watching her justify it and going through mental gymnastics to make herself feel better is nuts. She’s just confused and that has shown throughout her entire life.
For anyone about to shit on me, I really don’t care. She explained herself how babies are made and knows how it works. Fine to make the choice for yourself but to keep doing it and to clearly have no fucking real plan to prevent it. Don’t like hormonal birth control? Use condoms and pick a better partner. Your abortions weren’t hard on your relationship, y’all’s crappy life choices were. “Yikes” me all you want but people like her give pro-choice people a bad name and make pro-life people more pro-life. She put her life on the internet so she’s just as open to criticism as I am.
I’m 29 now, and I went through a DBT program when I was 19. I had been at a point then where I was ready to receive all that DBT offers, like a breaking point & so ready to put the work in to really apply it to my life. It all clicked for me, and it was like a 180 for my daily functioning and interpersonal relationship - to this day. I’m so happy for you! Also, glad to hear you’re doing so well - you deserve it!
You're still working through so much. Praying for you, Elle!
Excellent, given permission to go off topic
Your hair is soooo pretty. I have super fine pin straight hair and I was trying to figure out how to complement yours without being insensitive over an intense discussion.
Hearing you say "that is bullshit" I had my son 2 weeks after my 21st birthday. Thank you for this. It was a monumental choice that I made. My son is great & about to be 16. You have 20 years to decide if you want to have kids. We support whatever you want to do.
It sounds like all the decisions made by this person... were followed by decisions to counter the previous decision. Way to go.
I had my daughter two weeks after my 21st bday as well. Actually my birthday party was also my baby shower lmao! She’s 18 years old now. Definitely not a choice anyone should be able to make or take from anyone!
If you make the choice to have sex, there should be no life or death choice made for the unborn human in your womb, should that be the result.
Good to catch up with you, glad to hear you are doing well in school, while working so many important things out for yourself 🌹
Is the third or fourth abortion going to be as much of a "hard decision" as the first two?
Rude. Just because a woman has had one or two does not mean that she will continue to have them… but if she does, it’s not your business to judge.
Elle has stated very clearly that since then, she has been participating in regular therapy. That’s a good and healthy choice. Why not try encouraging women and leaving kind comments instead of rude, snide and contemptuous ones? What do you get out of being mean to people on the internet?
A little self reflection goes a LONG way.
@@EmpressEllie someone can have 50 abortions and it's no one's place to say it's messed up?
@@panicstation7 how often do you think there are people who have 50 abortions? I don’t think taking it to an extreme and unlikely situation is compatible to someone having two.
@@EmpressEllie A woman can abort as many babies as she wants and it's not my business - that's your argument. It doesn't matter how likely it is. You'd be fine with it
I mean.... it's a LEGIT, logical inquiry. Keep it real. Let's hope that's all :(
I knoe what you mean about birth control i am not able to take any borth control because those hormones give me horrible migrains so ibe been very successful with condoms and abstinence. I jabe 1 daughter and condoms and abstinance have kept me from havinf an unwanted pregnancy....your brave to come forward with your story...i pray for your mental health. Thank you for your story. PS what did the father of these babies have to say??? Was he supportive??
This was a well thought out heartfelt video. Glad to hear you are doing well.
this video made me feel sick please stop being so irresponsible
Baby would have died in less than 115 years, anyway.
Please stop judging others 😒
Glad you're doing a lot better with your life Elle!
I'm a pro-choice, but having 2 abortions just because you feel indecisive doesn't feel right to me.
Then you’re not pro choice?
@@siobhanrose1680 I am. But I don't think it should be done carelessly.
@@simona_merkinin But like you can’t really put conditions on another woman’s body/life, and call yourself pro choice. (In my opinion)
@@siobhanrose1680 I don't care if you understand what I mean, but I don't have anything against abortion if it's really what's best for the woman or the baby. I just don't like how she's using at as a contraception, like it's the easiest thing to do.
@@siobhanrose1680 and that's my opinion.
Hi Elle, I would look into IUDs. They have a very, very low amount of hormone. I have been sensitive to hormonal BC in the past, but it's a far cry from the hormones in the pill or the implant. My sex drive is normal, my PMS is normal...it's all gravy. No major cramps, and reduced monthly bleeding.
A friend of mine got pregnant while on an IUD. They don't work for many women and are very painful for many as well.
@@pmberkeley the paraguard is very painful. The hormonal iuds are very small and don't compare. I've had both. It's possible to get pg on any bc method. But statistically, they are more reliable than pretty much any other method, with the fewest side effects.
The paraguard caused me constant pain. I had it 3 years and then needed to have it removed.
@@clairehann2681 don't recommend birth control types based on your own experiences.
@@pmberkeley it's equivalent to deterring someone from asking about a method based on your friend's experience.
In a time when birth control is essential, other women's experiences are the first way we get a chance to consider our options. If you notice, I suggested she look into it--not that she *should* get one. For some reason the implant comes so heavily recommended, yet by dumping hormone into your system, wrecks your mood. I'm stunned this was the recommended method for Elle. I've heard very few people complain about hormonal IUDs, but I've heard many complain about the paraguard and the implant. Hormonal IUDs are often overlooked as an option, when they have caused the best risk to benefit ratio for the women I've discussed them with. Given that they don't contain estrogen, they are also less risky for people who have sensitivities to that hormone.
@@clairehann2681 your anecdote is not beneficial to somebody who has a different body from you, as evidenced by my friend who conceived on one.
Your honesty is so commendable. I really do admire that. I'm happy things are going well for you. Staying in school is fantastic! Making friends and being sociable is great! Keep up the good work! Abortion is a tough issue for me to come to terms with. My thoughts and feelings about it have changed a lot since it was first legalized. Thankfully I never needed one, although my daughter did. I didn't hestitate to encourage her. The time was wrong, the situation was wrong, it just would not have been a good thing. Having said that, I could not tell her enough times to get on some sort of birth control and stay with it! Using abortion for birth control just does not sit well with me. It's hard on your body, mentally and physically. There are moral issues to consider., and so on. Having said that, I had one pregnancy while using an IUD. The fetus was implanted inside my fallopian tubes. It was very painful and stressful. Had I not spontaneously aborted, I would have had to have an abortion, or die. I got pregnant again a couple of years later, carried my baby to term. After that it was one "female" issue after another. My body did not handle well having three pregnancies resulting in my three children, and one that ended in a miscarriage. I ended up having a complete hysterectomy, and other necessary corrections all at the same time. My body has been through hell backwards. Please do take care of yourself. The things your body is going through now can easily affect it for the rest of your life.
This is such a thoughtful and considerate comment. I’m sorry you’ve gone through all of that. Wishing you all the best
If a removal of a fetus is done to save the mothers life it is not an abortion
Not gonna bother watching the whole video, but did the birth control fail or were you using abortions as a form of birth control?
Why not bother to watch the whole video and get your questions answered?
Option B. The latter.
birth control.. again..
I am so happy for you. So glad you are feeling great. You are very smart and logical. Keep enjoying every moment. ❤❤❤
i hope things get better for you
Loving the long hair
You’re very brave coming on here and talking about this. I don’t comment but I love your channel
She's stunning +and+ brave!
I'm glad you took the time to be 'honest' about you being 'You' to the UA-cam World....it's a very brave thing to do.
Elle, you have a beautiful smile. Keep smiling. Props to you for sharing such very personal aspects of your life. You are brave. God bless you.
We double up with an IUD and condoms. Several people in my family have been conceived on the pill. And some women are very fertile after having an IUD removed.
Then they weren’t taking it then.
That 99% effective is actually 100%. They just say 99% on the label to avoid lawsuits, For that 1 in billion chance it did fail.
Thank you for keeping us updated and for sharing your journey to help others along with theirs. I’m wishing you continued enjoyment of YOU and knowing that you’re enough, along with your friends and family support system, so that you can enjoy your young adulthood. You’ve been through enough turmoil for a lifetime!
Give yourself time to process. Don't make any absolute decisions. Enjoy your life.
Your hair is so long Elle!
I am glad to see you doing well Elle.
I suggest another form of birth control.
The voice doesn't change?
No its permanent and they dont tell young people that.
I think a lot of people are being way too quick to judge you negatively. You seem like a very nice person Elle. I hope you're able to work through your hard times.
and here i thought i was irresponsible lol
I love that you end the video with a hope that people will leave a KIND comment here or elsewhere. Really shows the capacity of your heart. And yet, people are still here in the comments leaving rude judgements and unnecessary criticisms. SMH.
snowflake
Hey I hope you are fine!❤
I am happy there are people like you out there. People who won't have a child when they are not ready, people who understand that the most important thing is working on yourself first. I wish everybody was thinking like you! You are still very very young and you are a very clever person. I am sure you're going to do something good with your life, even if you would have to go through some bumps!
I’m really disappointed that people use death as a means to correct poor decision making. Not being pregnant starts with responsible behavior before sex. But we don’t tell people to be responsible.
@@dopedreamz it’s like you think abortion in the early stages of pregnancy is at all equivalent to death once a person is fully formed. It’s COMPLETELY different. A embryo cannot feel, see, hear, smell, taste… it’s literally a clump of cells. Most times when abortion os performed, it doesn’t even have a detectable heartbeat. I think if you understood biology better, you may not feel abortion is equivalent to death and or murder.
@@EmpressEllie I fully understand why it is crucial you believe it is simply a clump of cells. I understand why it is critical modern society convince you of that. I never said murder, it’s closer to euthanizing a dog when it gets too big or becomes too much work. If you can’t handle the dog don’t buy the puppy. if you’re not ready for a child don’t have unprotected/risky sex, and no unprotected sex on birth control is not safe sex. Why is it so horrible to hold people accountable for their actions. There are consequences for every action, every action has an equal and opposite reaction every decision has consequences, play stupid games win stupid prizes. These are things we know, I’m pro choice by the way. All I’m saying is think before you act, I’m not sure why that’s so horrible.
@@dopedreamz Death of whom? Something that is not even human and has no nervous system and no consciousness? I guess it's easy talking about death sitting in your apartment, eating bacon made from an animal that suffered its entire life only to make people satisfied. And having no clue people have many reasons not to use prevention. Some cannot use it. Some use it and it's not effective. Please, educate yourself. Learn the basics.
@@dopedreamz I'm really disappointed that vasectomy isn't mandatory for every teenage boy. It can be reversed when they demonstrate responsible behaviour and stage of life suitable for being an active party to raising a child.
Mandatory vasectomy would actually work to save these lives you say that you care about, unlike the approach the Republican SCOTUS has pursued.
hormonal birth control chiefly causes the symptoms you described if its progestin only, w/o estrogen. COCs are less likely to cause stuff like that, and Yasmin (drospirenone, ethynyl estradiol) is used as one of the two main medications for premenstrual dysphoric disorder.
Yaz is a very dangerous birth control
2?! Shouldn't the first one be a lesson to use birth control?
She’ll continue to have as many abortions as they’ll let her have because to her abortions are birth control.
in the first video she said she got an IUD after the first abortion, the second time wasn't her fault
@@ceciliamontiel4529 she knew that her IUD had failed and had been REMOVED and yet she still chose to have unprotected sex and concieved again. it WAS her fault.
Irresponsible. We gotta start being honest. Idk who needs to hear this but... abortion IS NOT birth control. And i'm not saying it should be your one 'get out of jail free card', either. Absolutely not! I believe it is evil and murder. Instead of preaching choice (when it really isn't), shout personal responsibility from the rooftops. You cannot seperate sex and procreation, not possible. I know that some want to live in this fantasy world where they'd like to escape from that reality of conception, but be mindful that if you're consenting to engage in intercourse, you're indirectly welcoming a CHILD, your child, into your life.
What are you studying in college
Reproductive Studies
I'm sickened by all the bullying and shaming that women who are childless by choice are being subjected to nowadays. "You'll die alone, you're selfish, who would want to have kids with you anyway," on and on. DON'T FALL FOR IT. It reminds me of the pressure to transition!
Not wanting to have children, and k*lling your children are different things.
Says the planned parenthood abortionist spreading propaganda. Why don't you all tell the women what you do to the babies organs and tissues and how you profit from it?
If you don’t want kids, it’s good to not have kids. However, find a good form of birth control up to and including abstinence to keep you from becoming pregnant. Definitely don’t have sex with someone who you don’t want to potentially have children with.
Using abortion as birth control isn’t really a good solution though.
I'm not trying to be rude but abortion is not birth control. If you like sex, use proper birth control. I'm not anti abortion but I think they shouldn't be trivialized.
Were you using protection?
I am happy for your that transitionning didn't fuck up your fertility. I'm sure that was the sense of getting pregnant twice : being sure to be still fertile. And this is nice to get a therapy. You are on the road of happiness.
If abortion was not an option, I think people would be more careful with birth control when sleeping around.
I come from a family of 7...some people are just idiots 😂
100%
It depends! I don’t want children but if I had an abortion I think I would terribly regret it… So I’m super paranoid about this
Exactly
You know nothing about history then, bc birth control is way more complex than that
In your defense I haven’t watched the whole video but this is a lot harder to get behind
Don't use abortion as birth control use a pill or condoms
Birth control fails dummy.
It could hurt your body later when you want children
Don't tell ppl how best to deal with their reproduction.
@@MissTotos Using abortions as birth control is irresponsible.
She got an iud, if you bothered to even listen to her story. Unreal how many commenters here will jump to criticism before using the ears god gave you.
Elle, you are such a brave woman to share all of this with us, thank you. Your channel is really fascinating, I appreciate that you really do put it all out there. On a more shallow note: your hair is absolutely gorgeous - you are a natural beauty and you look really healthy, I hope you're having a good summer!
I have so much respect for you, Elle. You look great, by the way.
Best advertisement for Durex Condoms
I wish I followed you on a platform I could message you on. I went through this. Please know you are not alone ❤️
Just curious why you didn't use protection, for it to happen TWICE is kinda.. strange to me. I'm all for abortion but I'm not for people using it as a form of birth control..
Did you watch the video? She addresses the forms of birth control used.
Literally not a single woman on earth uses abortion as their sole method of birth control, just like she didn't. I know you know that and just felt the need to say that tired "I'm pro choice but" that people always have to throw in but come on now. You know better than that.
@@user-zk1jz7mw2l lol you haven't met the women I've met. I know 2 who literally used it for birth control. One of them was pregnant 7x in 1 year. The amount of times I've heard from women in my life: I'll just get one if I get pregnant. No big deal.
@@user-zk1jz7mw2l For most couples trying to conceive, the odds that a woman will become pregnant are 15% to 25% in any particular month. She used abortion as birth control and yes women do it all the time.
@Ellie & @S, as far as she said in the previous video, there was NO birth control mentioned with regard to the first pregnancy. If I followed the second pregnancy story correctly, the IUD was expelled/removed prior to the 2nd pregnancy and the nexplanon insertion. Again, no BC mentioned. So, in the absence of astatement declaring the condoms failed, no, there were no precautions taken. In the absence of amention of reproductive coercion/abuse, yes, she did use abortion as Bc.
Those were decisions she made. Only she has to deal with the repercussions of any of these choices. Doesn’t matter if anyone agrees or doesn’t.
Abortions? Ok... 🙄
There is a lot of comments saying killing is bad, this isn’t one of them.
What I’m about to say comes from a good place. First figure out if you want to become a mother and have a family, and be sure of your decision. If you don’t get on permanent birth control and use protection; especially if abortions can be prevented all together, it’s just being morally responsible.
But if you do want to have a family, maybe now is your chance. It’s amazing that you can fall pregnant at all after transitioning and detransitioning. But the sad thing is just because you can fall pregnant now, doesn’t mean it’ll be this easy later in life. My best friend chose to have an abortion when she feel pregnant as a teen and now she’s been trying for six years unsuccessfully after eight miscarriages and it’s heartbreaking. She keeps going back to what if that was her only chance. If this is something you do want but your just scared, I do want that for you
What I’m saying is sometimes life happens, and that’s ok. That plan you have in your mid twenties might go up in smoke; you might finish your degree and find out it’s not for you, you might move back home, an opportunity might come your way that you didn’t plan for. What I’m getting at is don’t have a plan of how your life should be set in stone. Just figure out what you really want; a family, no family, lifestyle etc.
You can use the calendar as well and track ovulation. I cant use BC because makes me sick (all side effects +10) and this method hasn’t fail me yet (except for 2 kids 😅 due to a lot of alcohol) . The children and what not responsable people must matured into that part of life to be ok or want it. Be a parent is a beautiful experience when you can enjoy it, otherwise it is not. But you must be your own parent sort of first. Kind if know yourself because once that wheel starts its a rapid movement and you must be clear of who you want to be and where you going.
Praying for you
Wow....I'm honestly lost for words. Idk how or why you guys wouldnt of used protection after KNOWING the first time you didnt want it...abortion is not a form of birth control..smh I just dont get it. It's both of your faults that you guys got pregnant AGAIN. Maybe stop having sex if you dont want a kid
This was a year ago. What help does your judgement and criticism do for the past? She got an iud after the first one and it wasn’t in properly. THAT is NOT her fault. Maybe listen to the entire story before writing such comments. You just showed your inability to listen, all while passing unnecessary judgement.
I've watched her channel from the beginning. A consequent or blessing from having sex is the possibility of a child. If you arent responsible enough to raise a kid, dont have sex. It's simple. And she was NOT pregnant when her IUD came out that's irrelevant. Theres condoms that you can use...abstinence or adoption???? I'm not saying an abortion should be illegal but god damn 2 abortions in 4 months....??you're being irresponsible as fuck. And I'm not going back and forth with you. I wasnt rude. Its my opinion. Maybe it would make her think a little bit. She had two lives growing inside of her that she chose to end. So.
@@makeupaddixtionxoxo condoms, IUD, birth control are not 100%. Sometimes they dont work, and on top of that some people are hyperfertile making it even easier to get pregnant accidentally. This is basic medical information
Obviously all forms of birth control are not the same...you are completley missing the point🤦♀️I'm not arguing with stupidity. Have a great day I know I will👸🤷♀️
@@makeupaddixtionxoxo so every time you’ve had sex, you’ve had a child? How many kids do you have now? Or are you a virgin?
Just because you don’t interpret your comment as rude, doesn’t mean the recipient or other readers won’t.
It’s true, it is more common than one may think. My friend got pregnant right after her abortion. It was awful how ashamed she felt. It’s no one’s business why or how it happens.
I agree with you on hormonal birth control… it also made me suicidal. Worst time of my life. I recommend tracking your period with an app. My partner and I used condoms and the app and were able to not get pregnant for 2 years until we were ready to procreate consciously. I’m now due in less than 2 weeks! Period tracking isn’t for everyone (of course) but I think is a great start to recognize your cycle better!
Thanks for sharing your story Elle. I really admire your honesty and bravery after all the horrible comments I saw last time. Unreal how mean, judgemental and critical people can be, while they hide behind their screen name and superiority.
Very well said about how people think if you get pregnant you should just have the kid or give it up for adoption. It’s not realistic at all!!!! As someone who has struggled with a planned pregnancy, it absolutely can create mental health issues among other things.
I respect you for participating in regular therapy!!! Especially so young… you are ahead of the game tbh. You are doing your future self a huge favour doing the healing work now. Amazing.
Wishing you all the best on your journey.
Do you work?
26:51 damn! OK.
I been following you and haven't seen a video of you in awhile. I just want to say you look great and your voice is just fine. Last time I seen you it was a lot heavier. Listen to me do not deny yourself a chance to be a parent. It's the best thing you can do in life.
something popped into my head, unrelated to this partcular video. At one point i remember you saying you were diagnosed with BPD. I dont know you or your symptoms, but i just want to say, careful about BPD misdiagnoses in women/people perceived as women on the autism spectrum. BPD is diagnosed in women vs men at 4:1 ratio and the diagnosis in practice often has sexist overtones. For autistic women it's like a rite of passage to first be diagnosed with at least one personality disorder. I was one of them as well, after many misdiagnoses, i was diagnosed with lvl1 ASD, as of autumn 2022, after suspecting it since 2019 when i was 19.
I’ve been thinking about you!
I just had my baby girl a few days ago. I was hoping for an unmedicated and natural home birth. I was very prepared for this.
What actually happened is my OB coerced/bullied me into speeding up my labour by taking a medication that put my labour into fast track and caused me to be pushing at 4 cm dilated with my baby girl crowning. I ended up having a c section and the birth of my dreams was ripped away from me. I was drugged up and couldn’t even interact with my child until about an hour or more after she was removed from me. I was educated. I advocated and protested the drugs and they still got me. And I kept thinking how many other women go through this. Then I got to thinking about how many women will go through this because they will be forced to keep unwanted pregnancies. The trauma and pain they will endure in the name of pro life. I am scared for these women. And now, I am dealing with a massive hormone dump. I cannot drive or lift anything heavier than my baby for up to 6 weeks. I’m lucky because my partner is able to take time off work and is incredibly supportive and loving. And I’m still dealing with so much pain. Not just physical. And again, it makes me think of all of the women who aren’t lucky enough like me and will be forced into this scenario.
The women with abusive partners who don’t help. The young women who don’t have support systems. Etc etc. it’s just AWFUL and I’m grieving for them.
Anyways. I just came here to say that not all pregnancy and birth is magical. I planned my child and planned my birth and she’s beautiful and healthy… I’m still traumatized and emotional and cut open. I don’t know if I’ll heal. And I don’t know if all of the others who go through this will either.
Oh no, I am so sad to read this. Reading your comments on the previous video, I was wondering if you'd had your baby yet and how it went. I'm *so* so sorry it didn't go how you'd hoped, and that your OB put both you and your baby's health in jeopardy by wanting to speed the process along unnaturally. Yet another manifestation of how women aren't treated with full respect and humanity.
I'm sending you so much love and wishes for healing. 💕🩹🫂 Thank you for sharing your story, and thank you for your tender strength and fierceness.
@@Kira_Martel thank you so much for your reply. So many people just say,” what’s important is she is here and healthy” and sweep all the grief and trauma I just faced under the rug. It makes me feel really vulnerable and alone in those moments. Your comment made me feel seem and heard… I can’t thank you enough for that. Xox
karma
@@alexfox4647 karma for what exactly? Why are you leaving harassing comments?
@@alexfox4647 thats not karma that's the way the medical establishment treats tons of pregnant and laboring women and their babies. Par for the course for them.
I am sorry you had to go through two abortions, I will keep you in my prayers and that you can heal completely for the trauma from abortion, just have to say something if you don’t like for people to have a different opinion on this topic or any topic you should either disable the comments or stop making content on UA-cam, because that is all social media is all about whether you’re like it or not. 🤷🏻♀️
Here's an idea 💡 Abstinence prevents pregnancy. Just be celibate. Abortion should never be used as birth control. Especially when you yourself admit that you have problems. Do the responsible thing and don't have sex unless you're ready to take it all the way and handle your responsibilities as an adult and as a mother
It makes so much sense yet, it's considered Unthinkable by the vast majority of people today. The demoralization program has been complete for quite some time.
Or use condoms
Oh Elle. This made me so sad. I hope at this point you have found a better form of birth control. There are so many options out there that would help you avoid an unwanted pregnancy. If you don't want children, you definitely should look into permanent birth control.
Yikes.
Apart of this just seems to be a product of you making life altering decisions while immaturity. When u grow up you may find u feel differently than how you are feeling now. I am a pro choice lesbian so I’m not negatively judging your choices. I hope u truly find happiness.
I have been watching since your detransition. I hope that someday you will feel the desire to become a mother. Becoming a parent teaches you things you can’t learn any other way. Having a partner who loves you and wants to raise a family together changes everything. P.S. I think it’s amazing and wonderful that you are able to get pregnant at all.
P.P.S. Birth control was horrible for me. We’ve used condoms for most of our marriage.
Seriously you should be more careful with sex, abortion should not even be contemplated
I’m so proud of you for making the right decision ❤️ I’m 23 and I legitimately can’t imagine having a baby at this point in my life, not during uni and not when I can hardly look after myself some days.
It's really not that bad and it's the most fulfilling thing ever. Creating your own family is amazing and it's really an accomplishment like wow I made that. 23 is not young it's actually the healthiest time to have children in your 20s. You can have it it all. Don't sacrifice your first born for money and wealth because that's exactly what it is. Society says lots of of fcked up shit is normal when it's not. Elle has severe trauma because her parents allowed her to be experimented on. They are 100% to blame for all this trauma she has been through. Also when you have a Man's baby his love for you is more than any other women, it's a unique bond. Don't give your genetics a funeral.
@TheBody yeah maybe for you it's the most fulfilling thing for you, but not all of us are the same. For me, it is unimaginable having a child at 23, I've literally JUST HAD SEX FOR THE FIRST TIME like a few months ago. I was like a complete virgin until the age of 22, I didn't even kiss anyone prior to that.. I want to enjoy myself and my life and my partner and I want it to be just the two of us. And there is nothing wrong with that at all...
Elle you look amazing
Maybe consider a diaphragm or tubal ligation.
Very few doctors would do a tubal ligation on a 21-year-old woman with no kids.
@@MsFlamingFlamer there are lists available for each state. She should contact Planned Parenthood and they usually have a list. I hae over 10 friends that got sterilized. IT actually is much much easier these days and I think it would be a great option for her instead of having the abortions as birth control.
@@beckybarnes8875 I hope you are right. I’ve heard of so many young women having trouble
What the other commenter said is correct about using abortions as birth control. I mean you’re getting pregnant quite a bit & rather than using all possible prevention methods, you’re having reckless sex and repeatedly getting pregnant. You claim your mental health is too poor & that you never had motherly instincts or wanted children & that a child would ruin your life, ok then, why do you keep getting pregnant? If no abortions were available to you would you be more cautious? This isn’t a religious or political issue, it’s if you want to truly be seen as an adult & you want to do adult things then you have adult consequences. It’s one thing to get pregnant by accident once but to keep doing the same stupid thing over & over knowing that you’ll just get abortions is stupid.
This was a year ago. If you bothered to listen. This isn’t her present day timeline. Your shame and bullying is out of line.
I just stumbled upon this again, went through some of the comments on this video and the previous video, and it's shit like the type of about half the comments here that make me despair for humanity and the Earth! I still don't agree with your decision, never will and I can't say I wasn't disappointed when I first saw the title of the video but after watching it I agree it's fair that the reasons for the first abortion still applied for the second and I simply cannot imagine the hormonal battle that went through you during your second pregnancy. The fact that you put out this video given the political climate in the US the past few years is incredibly brave, I can't begin to imagine the gaslighting, abuse and threats you get just for putting such a video out and how it must affect your mental health. At the end of the day the only person responsible for your life is you and we all make mistakes, but it is not for others to impose their views as to what constitutes a mistake onto you or anyone else. I hope you are in a better place than you were in the year or so since these videos and that you are flourishing as the young woman you want to be and not the person society tells you that you should be.
Have you ever heard of a condom?
Maybe you should be asking if her ex partner has instead. She was using contraceptives. She talked about IUD and hormonal birth control. The IUD was placed wrong, hence the second pregnancy!
Did you not listen to what she said?
apparently not, if its consensual sex, then you decide if your letting him go bare back inside of you or not. That is a choice.
This is deeply depressing. Please stop creating and destroying innocent lives on a whim.
Pregnancy is never easy, and I'm tired of women making the decision to end their childs life because of their own feelings. Feeling pass and change constantly and that life is precious. My aunt was made to have an abortion at 13 and I know the pain that is causes. You should care. I love you in your pain and through your transition is a huge story that should be told. But when you recognize the importance of life and how many lives you impact you can then heal. God bless!!! Im keeping you in my prayers.
If you think abortion is murder- but would also take a braindead family member off life support, you need to reevaluate what you think qualifies as “life” or potential for life.
@@thicciesmalls Taking someone off life support isn’t the same as injecting them with poison or tearing off their limbs.
@@thicciesmalls I had nurses and drs tell my uncle that he should take my aunt off of life support and we told him she was gonna wake up because she responded to pain and they said we were wrong...she did wake up and though her life is not the same she is thankful to be alive none the less. Why do y'all stand up the strawman arguments that are torn down so easy? Its murder and ending a life or its not...no straw man...its ending a life. God bless!
@@fuschiarose Exactly! But it is ending a life so I see their argument. But its still a straw man. God bless!
Well mommy hope you take care of the unwanted kids that no one cares about🤣
To be a little more serious I really still wish my mother would have maybe just gotten her last child...
Some people and some people's life's are NOT for kids! And only because you CAN get pregnant there is no logical reason why you should. I wish people had to apply for Pregnancy just like for adoption.
Odd how often the word "bravery" is used in the comments. "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."
No, I think it's the right word for the situation, thanks to people like you.
Yeah, it's brave in light of all the keyboard warriors who come to throw stones......abortion isn't the modern "sin" you seem to think it is....there are allusions to abortive substances even in the Bible _gasp!_ ....abortion has been part of humanity for the whole of the history of humans..... modernity has made the procedure safer....also, the whole "men don't get to choose" wails are 99% BS too....most men want the abortion even moreso than the woman, and the leading cause of death for pregnant women is homicide....just a few facts for whomever reads this.
@@ncjxbshj exactly. It’s super brave to face so much criticism and judgmental attacks head on.
It certainly is brave.
Donald I don’t think you’ve ever been in this situation and have any idea what it’s like to go through it. So maybe don’t speak on it
Some of the people in this comments section have never lived through this kind of situation and have also never been in their early 20s before and it shows. Elle is a human being too and these are quite heavy, heavy decisions to make at her age . Even if she decided to go through with being pregnant at this age. What it must have taken to pull yourself together through everything you have already been through Elle. I think she did the best that she could and these are some of the things that happen if life that bring about so much self discovery. Elle I am so happy to see that you have done all of this work coming back from all of this and still navigating the aftermath of going through what she just went through. This was Elle's choice alone her body alone and our opinions really do not matter because it's Elle's life to live. Thank you for sharing your story and I wish you so much healing and best for your life in the future ❤️
Well said!
Great to see someone commenting here with compassion not judgement
2 babies killed in one year...what a prize.
Get back to us when you've grown yourself a vagina.
I agree with u. You should take your time, and become more responsible of your actions before having another human being depending on you. We all should to the same. Much love for u!
Elle was getting jiggly!
Elle I have followed you for years. I feel like you should consider becoming a voice for people who are about to make the same missteps you made. There’s a long life ahead of you, perhaps this can give you a positive outlet and some purpose.
i love listening to you
@18:53 you said "I dont want to have a kid shen you need to work on becoming a better person" but can I just tell you as someone who could not see myself having kids to now being a mom and step mom, kids are what make us better people. They teach us patience and forgiveness, and they can drive us a little crazy but they help be your obsession. They are a gift to help us in this ugly world. You are so opening my mind to why people make these choices. Thank you for sharing your story.
Too true, having a kid forces people to grow up and be less selfish. After all you have a sentient being that’s totally defenceless and completely reliant on you.
Narcissism and the self is a real problem in todays world.
I hate hearing “I wasn’t ready” nobody is. But you deal with it and become better people for it.
Only some people, that's why there are millons of bad parents who abuse or even kill their kids
My wife and I have been trying to get a baby for 6 years now with no luck. Her period is irregular so it's pretty hard for us to conceive. Plus my sperm count is lower than normal, that's what happen when you get older.
my husband and i, 7 years. isnt it interesting
Look for a functional medicine doctor, or a homeopathic Dr and ask about natural supplements for cycle regulations and testosterone increase. Vitex, dong quai and Ashwaganda are a good place to start. There's also great info online.
So? Why are you commenting that?
@@standup2982 because people can’t seem to separate their own situations from someone else’s. It’s getting kind of ridiculous the projection going on from these sorts, hey?
@@EmpressEllie exactly 💯
It's always like if a husband has an affair. The wife always blames the mistress and not her husband. There's a true crime which is high profile, the Watts family murders. The husband murdered his pregnant wife and their two daughters aged four and three. It's a horrendously case, truly shocking what that man did. The amount of hatred towards the mistress is unbelievable. People blaming her, even accusing her of being there. She didn't know and it's proved that she wasn't there. She's changed her name and has been in hiding for four years because of these crazy people saying she was responsible and should either be in prison or killed.
First things first. You cannot have children where you are going to carry over severe mental problems. Abortion is a serious decision, but you worked out what you wanted.
your a strong beautiful lady. very proud of u☺️
😂😂Strong?, what kinda strength are you talking about
I'm not super pro-life and I'm not super pro-choice - I'm kind of a fence-sitter on this issue. At the time of your last video, I felt your reasoning for your first abortion seemed very self-centered, but I said nothing because I didn't feel like being one of those judgemental people in the comments section. But now 2. Based on your description of mental health struggles, I suppose you're probably right that you're not parent material, but it seems deeply regrettable to me that two potential lives (because, no matter how you justify it, that's what they were) were snuffed out. I know bad parenting is also a tragedy, but putting infants up for adoption is also a thing, after all. I don't know your life, but I feel like it was avoidable. I don't know. Just my gut reaction.
Idk, expecting someone with a history of both depression and dysphoria to go through nine months of a situation she's not really coping with, plus the uncertain psychological effect of abandoning the baby does not appear ideal to me either. Certainly nothing I would want to put someone close to me through
There is a big problem with your "potential lives being snuffed out". You are loading an already difficult situation with another meaning and significance.
Abortions happen every day on the most wanted and searched pregnancies. In the era of birth control most abortions happen because of miscarriage or because of medical issues with the mother or the fetus. All abortions are already difficult, but these I described are even worse. You are making the life of women who willingly get pregnant and search a child more difficult.
Self centered? It’s her body and her life. God forbid she make a decision based off that lol
You must be really torn up by all the miscarried lives then and you must really be devoting a lot of your time to miscarriage prevention advocacy, huh.
Self centred, self indulgent 👍
There are already enough kids being raised in unstable situations and dealing with the lifelong trauma resulting from it. Thank you for not contributing to that population
At least u still have a beating heart to be able to have this life to live that ur so excited about. I too had an abortion 30 years ago and I now regret it big time. And why are u only thinking of what could of been in a negative way? How bout some positive examples. I mean u were convinced in the beginning of ur transition that I were a man but now look at u. I mean no disrespect but ......
A women becomes pregnant after the 1st time, if she is familiar with the male. The body will take nd incubate that sperm, because it recognizes it. Also the level of oxytocin release during the mating act (😅) encourages this.