'Men and women after
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- Опубліковано 11 вер 2018
- If the cultural conversation looks increasingly like a dysfunctional relationship between men and women, how can we move forward? This is the third in a series of films on 'Men and Women after #metoo' from Rebel Wisdom.
Warren Farrell has a unique perspective, from being one of the most high profile feminists in the 1970s, before writing a series of books that led to him being described as the 'father of the men's movement'. Now he leads couples counselling - helping women and men to listen to and understand each other.
Part 1 of 'Men and Women after #metoo' is our podcast where we discuss the issues raised by these films in depth: • Men and Women after #m...
Part 2 is an exclusive interview with the director of the sleeper hit on the Men's Rights movement, the Red Pill Movie, Cassie Jaye, here: • My 'Red Pill' suicide ...
To see the second part of the interview with Warren Farrell - "Men need to speak up!", please support us on Patreon: www.patreon.com/rebelwisdom
Rebel Wisdom is running workshops for men and women to get a direct experience of the ideas in our films: rebelwisdom.co.uk/events
Get tickets for our London event 'Join the Great Intellectual Awakening' on 18 September here: www.tickettailor.com/events/r...
Find us on iTunes and Spotify, or visit rebelwisdom.podbean.com to download Rebel Wisdom as an audio podcast.
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Dr. Warren Farrell is the author of the just-published The Boy Crisis (with co-author John Gray). It exposes the boy crisis worldwide, as well as the causes and solutions that can be implemented by parents, schools and policy makers.
Dr. Farrell has been chosen by the Financial Times as one of the world’s top 100 thought leaders. His books are published in over 50 countries, and in 20 languages. They include two award-winning international best-sellers, Why Men Are the Way They Are plus The Myth of Male Power.
Warren was a pioneer in the women’s movement as the only man elected three times to the Board of the National Organization for Women in NYC. He is currently Chair of the Coalition to Create a White House Council on Boys and Men, and a pioneer in the men’s movement.
Dr. Farrell’s books contribute to 12 disciplines. A book on couples’ communication, Women Can't Hear What Men Don't Say, was a selection of the Book-of-the Month Club. His Father and Child Reunion has inspired many dads to be more involved with their children. And Why Men Earn More: The Startling Truth Behind the Pay Gap--and What Women Can Do About It was chosen by U.S. News and World Report as one of the top four books on careers.
Warren has taught at the university level in five disciplines, and appeared on more than 1,000 TV and radio shows, and been interviewed by Oprah, Barbara Walters, Peter Jennings, Katie Couric, Larry King, and Charlie Rose. He has been featured repeatedly in The New York Times and The Wall Street Journal. He has two daughters, and lives with his wife in Mill Valley, California, and virtually at www.warrenfarrell.com.
This interview was very difficult for me to watch and I'm quite upset now that I've seen it, but I also think this was very important and I do not regret watching this. There were many things discussed here that I could relate to on a personal level and wasn't prepared to think about. Thank you for sharing this.
I really enjoyed this. Food for thought.
Good stuff as usual, Rebel Wisdom!!
Great conversation ... thank you..! 👌
Warren Farrell is amazing. The Boy Crisis is a great book that any dad or mom with a son should read.
Best interview on men's issues today I've heard so far.
He said women of the future would seek men with emotional intelligence. That’s different than saying they will seek men that are emotional. A person without emotional intelligence is one that has usually suppressed all emotion for the sake of survival. That’s the hero that accepts societies definition of doing the right thing by sacrificing their needs so their family doesn’t have to
The emotionally intelligent man realizes he is looking for a balance rather than taking on an overload of responsibility for the sake of other people. His happiness matters and it’s a priority. If he takes on a family, it will not be about survival. It’ll be about enhancing his life. He’s still the hero but, he pulls it off with ease.
Will women really want this kind of man one day? I hope so. A man that values his happiness carries that happiness within the home and sets an example for his family that says “Life isn’t all about pain and survival as it was in generations past”
This is certainly the type of man I'm looking for. Shouldn't this be the type of women men are looking for as well?
That’s a good point Kelsee. It goes both ways. I know I have always looked for someone that realizes how important it is to keep the house clear and light. A lot of times they allow someone or something to come into their life that has appealed to their emotions. Like a family member that needs help but has no intent on keeping the peace. I completely understand their need to help that person. I’ll stay out here in the woods by myself 🤣. Just to be clear. I know there’s a lot of great women and men out there that are trying to find each other. Hats off to you people
That's an overly optimistic view given his latter statement about women not wanting Clark Kent until they have Superman and his anecdote about Gloria Steinem and the cabbie. Women will still be hypergamous so a man's "authenticity" or "emotionally intelligence" will be icing on the cake. Men will still have the burden of performance.
Women are already looking for this. As women are becoming more and more financially independent, it is freeing them to choose their partners based on mutual happiness and growth rather than just stoic support and protection that was promoted by society in the past. Studies have shown that in countries where women have more financial independence they are more attracted to qualities that point towards being caring fathers and partners, and care less about how much money and status they have.
First time i have seen or heard of theis man warren farrell. All i can say is I am seriously impressed and inspired by his kindness compassion insight and wisdom. Total respect sir. respect to Rebel Wisdom too..love your uploads
Probably the best perspective on this topic I've heard so far.
Agreed 100%
Disagree
@@boogaloo_frog8410 because........?
@@boogaloo_frog8410 your bitterness towards women is reasonable and understandable. However, you are in an extreme position that will not fix the problem.
This was very thought provoking. I need to think about this. I'm sad that after a year now there should be at least 1,000 times more views than it has. Very reasonable presentation.
It's a shame that he and the interviewer have negative views of MGTOW because it actually encourages the kind of emotional openness and lack of dependence on women's approval that he advocates. It may not be as genteel as someone as classy as Dr. Farrell would like but that's what comes from men working through all their feelings including anger and betrayal.
This channel is an attempt to "include" mgtow in their conversation, and then destroying it in favor of women. Do not trust any of this content.
@Stefan Slade Your perception of the issues is right on the money. I get the arguments but, the methods, attitudes and role of emotion come across as 2 sides of the same coin, both misguided.
@@boogaloo_frog8410 they're right. There is still hope. You have to dig through the coal to find the diamonds. It's hard and you risk pain but it's worth it. Being alone is not the answer. There are good women out there.
Silence in the face on injustice is not being a 'good woman's. Why are so many women silent on the injustice that femunism is imposing on men? Self interest and adherence to gynocentrism that is why. For example femunism women reproductive rights for women but withheld them from men. Women can choose to be a parent or not, men can not!
@@jonahtwhale1779 Absolutely correct, sadly.
Thank you for this series - great job!
Fantastic content and an extremely important conversation to be had at this time. Appreciate Rebel Wisdom's balanced approach to this.
Excellent!!
Such a forthright conversation!
Feminism has really liberated men. I enjoy my life since I found minimalism and MGTOW philosophy. It is not about men against women, it is individualism against collectivism.
Warren Farrell is excellent
amazing
this is a brilliant and necessary conversation, thanks for articulating the point of view of men
this just blew my mind
This guy talks total sense....
This is high quality content👌🏾
no it isn't. This channel is poison
@@boogaloo_frog8410 I think you're poison. You're certainly spreading your own venom and it's obvious by your comments littering this thread...
@@boogaloo_frog8410 real men don't turn their backs and run like you.
Dr. Farrell should, if he does not, should tell boys and men if they express feelings, that they are not being "women," but being full and healthy men. I absolutely agree and am glad he says that progressives need to let other sides express their political views.
It's amazing that women are even crazier than I thought.
All‘s Farrell in love and Warren.
I'm interested in some of the stuff he talks about around 59 mins.. these men who work all the time and spend little time with their children, then regret it later. How much of that is a competitive work culture that punishes those who want a work/life balance? how much is it fear that they will disappoint their family if they bring in less money? because I've seen a lot of families where the wife and children really want to spend more time with the father but he chooses constant career progression and competition over that, despite them saying they can afford to live on less. Is it because he doesn't really believe them? Or is it because he's become so indoctrinated by the work culture he's in that he would feel too ashamed to be seen by his male peers to be working less? Or is there more to this than either scenario, or a mix? Genuinely curious what people think might be the best solution so men can enjoy quality time with their families without shame.
First of all Erin Prizzey is an amazing brave person that has done so much good but is a sad example of how that good is misused and clearly demonstrated by the fact that she is not welcome in the amazing places and very shelters that she established. Cant we have movements any more that begin with the intention of love and equality, without them slowly becoming the very same oppressors that they initially fought to stop. Its great to see the amount of interest in intellectual discourse on deep complex problems growing hopefully on the beginning of the exponential curve. I've noticed that when someone intellectual speaks almost all truths that resonate with the majorities, the wisdom lies within the honest unbiased deconstruction of how evolution has brought us to this point in time. When we grow in numbers like we do, we become analogous to particles in the universe thus invoking a human form of chaos theory. As this is the case one could look at any slight irregularity and define it as anything. I am a big supporter of the initial importance of the feminist movement and the clear need for certain issues to be addressed, which I believe almost all western men (at least) certainly have. These days it seems, a 'feminist' is now mainly a word that's been redefined by focusing on all the different points of males behaviour in comparison to a females and using them negatively to label all mankind (in the literal sense), to answer questions that show how the complexities of present day societies have formed differently for men as they have for women. I empathise with women who find how modern men's differences to themselves could easily come to conclusions from the present facts to perceive men in this way, especially when certain male traits seem to keep coming to light in difficult situations that a woman could be in. For example, I could pull out many commonalities of the traits of women that run side by side to specific difficulties that men will always face when compared to a woman (Child Care for example) and bundle them together negatively and label a new movement for men such as a 'Masculist' and set a movement off for men that would resonate with them, as I would have chosen inarguable facts of the pasts of women in general to justify and explain this movement that no one could deny. Not only would I be using the past facts to come to incorrect conclusions about the present day and predicted future, I most of all would be specifically looking for negativity to promote this that will only ever lead to oppression, hate, anger and most of all, a difficult society to live in. If one were to look at evolution a bit more precisely, honestly, pragmatically and thoroughly it would be clear that the modern traits of men and women have occurred from the past influences of each other naturally to keep the fine tuning of the balance over time to work better as a whole and most importantly the necessity for this to work is not only the essential fact that men and women are different but the millions of years of fine tuning will produce a better balance than any one persons ideas can. A positive conclusion to take away is to look deeper into our pasts to notice how time has brought us together and that focusing on negative truths just create false negative theories on the entirety of things. Time will always be so much better served to understand our past by using this understanding to try to not make any previous mistakes again in the future. Men and women ARE different and accepting this by then implementing our separate positive and negative traits in a constructive way will always create a better balance of well-being for one and for all. Humans naturally remember bad things for a positive evolutionary reason for our futures and by understanding why this is and how to consciously practice this can only ever make a better future. The patriarchy and matriarchy aren't necessarily words that shouldn't exist just because they have mainly been used to promote negative connotations (mainly towards men), they (when thought of together) are a better force as a whole that is not to be reckoned with. In this case the two words together literally equal human beings. Separately our anatomies are always going to invoke different consequences that hopefully together make a better whole.
emotional intelligence is a necessity for the survival of humanity....it's sink or swim....
1:01:35 - Is it true that men want this? Seems like an individual preference, but I don't have a male perspective. I would love to hear comments as, in my experience, I've noticed some men feel offended by this notion as an insult to their abilities to provide.
Unfortunately, we are now at a point where there are far more unknown variables to consider in the dating scene. Hopefully both sexes can get past feeling offended if somebody guesses incorrectly on preference and recognizes that we both need to learn to properly articulate our preferences as situations arise.
I am lucky enough to have had a large group of friends since i was young and until now. Almost everyone that i know will do anything to make their closest loved ones feel secure, including seeming offended if these people question if he is ok providing like he generally does. This does not mean to say that in this case you are just doomed to never know what he is really feeling, as he will usually only do this if he see's no other alternative without affecting anyone else. I have travelled the world and strangely I've noticed this anywhere from tribes to the busy streets of Shibuya (Japan). Though if any culture in the world is taking over what used to be perceived as a Mans role I would say that would be Japan too. The strange thing is, is that this movement is turning the majority of men into feeble people that are largely scared of women, so much so that the major companies ore slowly replacing the men that built them with women and it is reflecting on the population to the point that schools are rapidly being shut down. I have read a lot of papers that suggest this to be the case and can hardly find any others that can give good solid alternative reasons for this. I never state anything to be a fact but just what seems apparent from the evidence. I'm also really not suprised that no other people (men) replied to this. I guess we have ourselves to blame, but as the video shows its ALMOST a catch 22. But only if and I can say this for a fact a rare case of o women really seeming genuinely concerned as to weather a man is happy with what he is doing and most importantly encouraging him to search for true happiness with the reassurance that evrything will be ok. Please any men tell me if I am wrong!
Thanks for the comment! To steel man and make sure I understand, the men in your experience do want to provide and have act offended when that was in question? This next bit may be the part I misunderstood. These men usually only express this, or other feelings, if they believe there is no other alternative because they don't want to negatively affect anybody else?
I agree that this movement has negatives, though I'm sure there is still truth and injustice in some of the stories. There also seems to be something going on in society that is altering how men and women act and perceive each other. Possibly the encouragement to swap masculine and feminine traits within genders. Where is this idea being generated from?
It's sad to hear your experience is that most women aren't genuinely concerned about men's true happiness. I'm not sure if it's most women (it could be, things are crazy lately), but I have observed this in situations with male friends of mine and it makes me sad. I'm not sure what the causation is, but I do believe women acting like this is predicated on abandonment issues which form codependent behaviors. False beliefs, "If the man is truly happy he will leave me." perpetuate the issue. But what is causing women to feel an increase in abandonment?
Definitely a catch 22 situation, but if it helps, there are women like me out here who do want men to be genuinely happy. It's logical and biological. Societies aren't going to flourish if half of the population is distressed. This will only result in the other half also being distressed.
Edit: Clarification in my second paragraph.
Wow this is the first real time I have commented on the Internet and was a not an amazingly thought out comment (though honest and genuinely passionate to this subject, hence why I did respond), more of a few certain memories and specific moments in my life that kept surfacing when watching these, reading the comments and watching the red pill documentary. I'm already blown away and impressed by the detail to the depth and incredibly astute observations to either side of the argument you have made. Super impressed and unexpected. Just got to bed real late. So I'm going to give it some proper and honest thought and get back to you. I wish the world had more interesting and constructive thinkers like you in in! :) .Just to clarify that I am just as passionate towards women's issues too in case I sounded like some kind of mens justice warrior. But it is a very interesting subject and really keen to hear more of your poi ts of view.....
Thank you! I really appreciate your kind comment. Likewise! I look forward to your thoughts.
You definitely didn't come off as uninterested in women's issues and I appreciate you wanting to clarify. If anybody should be concerned it should be me for interjecting women's issues into a discussion about men's issues, but I suppose it is because I see them as connected and playing off of each other. I find men's issues equally concerning and I hope open discussions like this help alleviate the problems so we all can get to experiencing more fulfilling lives.
What men NOW want (now that the traditional family has been destroyed by women) is to build companies, go to the gym, invest their wealth, and minimize the intrusion of toxic femininity. The Kavenough testimony was a big win in waking up men to the toxic female.
I have a honest question. What is the point of breaking down the natural tendencies of the two genders? The fact that we have cultural and biological tendencies is admitted multiple times in the interview. Why is it assumed to be a good thing to break these down?
edit- I really like this guy
Because there is a scary movement worldwide amongst universities where certain groups of mainly social studies are attacking the facts of biology to the point where people have already been arrested or lost jobs just for calling a man a he or a woman a she with no intention to offend but it seems that the fact that it is is growing rapidly
Agreed. Sadly a distressed society is easier to control..
"You see, folks, we're all trying to please someone else. And as soon as you're not a human be-ing, you're a human do-ing. Then what comes next?"
―Brad Goodman, self-help guru
"A human go-ing!"
―Bart Simpson, self-help critic
I am a female Psychotherapist and have been appreciating this series on a personal, professional and on a human level part of a society. This interview is a great step forward. I see the gender clash we have been in for many generations, if not forever, as competition for resources. Those resources include financial resources but also resources of support, attention, safety, emotional understanding and more. All the needs that we naturally have have been dismissed or denied for so long. We are lost in these battles. I think this situation has come about for a combination of reasons. One of them has to do with Economics and its effects on attachment styles. I would love to get involved in this and will try to make contact with you if you don’t find me first.
The resources to be exploited are *men.* Expendable men and boys treated as disposable utilities for the service of women.
So many truth bombs here
MGTOW doesn't demonize expressing your feelings. The only things they hold as true are: do not marry, cohabitate or have kids; until the laws change.
And important to note that its not in any way putting down women as a whole, its just that sadly there are some who use the bias system to their advantage, so much that men can literally have their whole worlds (including family) taken from them. Then sadly when these situations arise a man will usually be at his most vulnerable and if he does express this at a point when a woman may need strength the most, it can subconsciously trigger a female to take a man down harder. Is it really a Man's world?? I dont know :)
That's not how you change society. You'll only deepen the issue
55:56 yeah right. good luck with that!!
I'm a 50 yr old women and I've never met a feminist in my life...whats is their natural habitat?
Universities, HR departments.
Well, even though few people call themselves feminist, almost everyone believes in feminist rhetoric and concepts, like rape culture, female oppression, male privileges, female objectification, and of course the patriarchy theory. Simple test for you: ask anyone around you if they think women were oppressed in the past, or if men were privileged. Almost every single person you ask will say "yeah, of course".
People identifying as feminist may be quite uncommon relatively speaking, but people believing in feminist theories are everywhere, even the most traditionalist/conservative people drank the feminist kool-aid, at least partially. But yeah, self identifying feminist are usually 40/50+ women from the 2nd wave of feminism, or 30- people hardcore 3rd wave. That's what seems to be the case from my perspective.
As for most ideologies, the problem is not so much about how many people pushed their ideology, but rather how much people followed that ideology, even though they don't identify as a part of that ideological group. Doesn't matter if only 0.1% or 30% of the population pushes a narrative, what matters is that the majority of people accept that ideology.
Petco, buying cat food.
Everywhere I go!
Blue hair women are usually crazy feminists.
Angry is not the same as hateful. Sometimes they overlap but they are not the same emotions. This is a big mistake people tend to make. Hate comes more from envy and malice and can be vociforous or silent, manipulative and sneaky. Anger is usually more openly expressed and fuelled by upset and pain.
15.00 every time i have criticised a woman, reasonably, justified and respectfully...the relationship ends. no behaviour change just ends. this is so true,
Yeah ok answered at 23.00
I love how he complains that society is not charitable to men's problems, and then proceeds to be uncharitable to men's problems.
this is depressing as fuck, not what Warren said, but knowing most people won't understand what he said and will just dismiss him as some bitter man.
The burden of performance has always been and will always be sitting on men's shoulders, no matter how much social engineering.
For the first time in the history of our species, we men and women, have lost faith in the future. Losing that faith means that we are stifled and we have become inward looking. It is really easy to get a sense of despair, however often the spirit is stirred when an examination of our conscience is required. We simply cannot remain within this culture of death i.e 9m abortions in the UK since 1968. Add to that their children and grand- children. That's lot of potential scientists, engineers etc. We eulogise regarding protection of animals and the environment yet we despise the unborn. Next will be the elderly, and it will happen. The Chinese will be the first when they realise how catastrophic the one child policy has been. We regularly hear claims that there are too many humans on the planet. Again we undermine the dignity of our species when we know full well how innovative we are. We have a whole universe of resources; think about that. There is no enduring joy or love about the claims of the feminist movement or the SJW liberal elite. That agenda is demonic in terms of it's perfection and it is so cunning, so baffling, that the folk perpetrating it cannot themselves see what awaits us.
13:49 That is the crux of the matter.
18:20 Poor Matt Weinstein.
You don't choose who you fall in love with
MGTOW is a philosophy, not a movement
Real men don't turn their backs on society. At least not for long.
Feminist: "Men should talk about their feelings like women, then the suicide rate would go down"
Man talking about his feelings
Feminist: "Ooooh cry me a river"
32:00 he speaks about "initiation processes", but doesnt give specific examples - I've long held the idea that something severely lacking in the west is a proper "coming of age" ritual. In other cultures there are a range of varieties from scarification to bar mitzvahs, yet in the west there is just...nothing. Driver's license sort of acts like one. Same when reaching the drinking age. But those aren't on the right level.
No man has ever tried to rescue me! Maybe I’m not whining loud enough
Unfortunetly we have had to stop rescuing women, it is sexist apparently.
Sometimes the rescuing is subtle and other times, it's obvious- so obvious, we take it for granted. Here's some examples...
Subtle:
1) When you were pregnant, injured, or simply existing in a public space, a man gave up his seat for you= rescued from discomfort.
2)When your car broke down, random men stopped to help you push it off the road= rescued from a laborious task & from danger.
3) He paid for your drink= rescued from even minor financial strain.
Obvious:
1) Dangerous jobs that protect you and/or your freedom that largely occupied by men.
2) Laborious jobs that keep society running smoothly and thereby rescue you from inconvenience and/or hard/undesirable labor.
3) Pandering to our every desire/pursuing us= rescued from the risk of rejection, isolation, and more.
We've all been rescued in one way or another, if not my a male peer then by a father or father figure.
We have the power to rescue men too but generally speaking, men really do seem to believe it's their role to protect us/help us/make us happy....no whinning necessary.
BakedBella I was really just trying to make a joke. I wasn’t really complaining
@@manaloola2018 Oh ok. My bad
Are you sure? or did you just miss/dismiss it?
Feminism drying Unifism rising
Hm. Someone who is reasonable. No wonder his career got torpedoed.
This Warren Farrell is a sincere guy. unfortunately I don't share his optimism about women being able to admit anything to themselves. especially the young women of today which Warren Farrell is probably too old to know. these girls are so incredibly spoiled and should not be complaining about anything. they have not suffered any oppression but are just weak.
so sadly true. I have recently been at uni at 36 years old and have seen more cases of this than I ever even dared to want to try to believe ....
I disagree. The conversation is an attempt at sincerity I agree. But ultimately this channel is about finding a way out for feminists. They want to keep their anti-male legal system, they don't want to admit that they've wrecked the Family. they just want men to come back to the plantation, which would be a very foolish thing to do.
QAnon
Hell yeah!
Why I am mad at “Rebel wisdom” is that these interviews are a total scam and a propagation of a feminist mentality to deal with the problem. I did not watch this part 3 of the interview, but I am 100% sure, this interview does not give any constructive suggestion. Am I right on this?
So the problem is that the plantation had become so poorely managed, that men go on strike (MGTOW) and boys are comitting suicides. RIGHT? So at the end even stupid people had discovered that a plantation without slaves cultivating them MIGHT end bad. RIGHT?
Ok, as a responsible man, one might ask: how can I help to stop all this maddness? At least some few hundreds of thousands of years the plantation had worked prety nicely, it even made the life of majority of people mostly sufferable...
No suggestion from “Rebel wisdom”, actually you can even see the signs of sabotage: let out some farts, which ammeliorate some of the slave resentment and win some time for the sustem...
So, here is my radical but constructive suggestion: men and boys will be killing themselves more and more, because the best constructive suggestion MGTOW is not effective enough. Let us play with statistics: spread the message that suicide day must not be random, but, say, the first day of a month or first day of a week or that men’s dead body may wear a broken watch, which shows a midnight. Then this will be our message to the masters of plantation. It will not be enough to ppen the floodgate to immigrants to replace the lost slaves in plantation. This may make some idiots at the top start thinking of some solution...
STOP RAPING, STOP TOUCHING WITHOUT CONSENT, KEEP YOUR FILTHY HANDS TO YOURSELF, YOU ARE NOT ENTITLED TO ANYONE ELSES BODY. YOU SICK PEOPLE!
Troll