Realise Your Worth | Hayley Ep 1
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- Опубліковано 10 жов 2022
- Have you ever asked yourself: "Am I worthy of therapy?" Most of us, at some point, have needed help but haven't asked for it. We tell ourselves it's reserved for "people with real problems" and that we don't qualify. But the truth is, we all struggle and we're all worthy of help. This week, we meet Hayley, whose lifelong feeling of low worth has had some catastrophic consequences...
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Ding, ding, ding! That is the bell ringing as so much of that session rang true for me. Cancer 4 - a skin cancer on the tongue - after 3 previous skin cancers - and I'm not coping mentally. Got a helpline number to ring but "it's only skin cancer with no chemo/radio (yet?!), there are better people who are sicker and in more need, you've had CBT and know what to do to sort your self out - so just b****y do it, you useless waste of space" and it's me saying that to myself. Thank you Alex for the session and a very special thank you to Hayley for allowing us to share her troubles. Wishing her well in her healing journey. And I'll ring the helpline tomorrow!
It's comments like this that makes all the hard work the team put into making this series worth it, thank you for sharing, and PHONE THAT HELPLINE :-)
Sending lots of love and strength to you hun …healing too xx ❤❤
This was so good. An amazing therapist with a beautiful soul. Looking forward to the rest of Hayley’s journey. I wanted to hug her soooo much towards the end. I’m ready to pop the champagne when she figures out she is sooo incredible and strong. ❤
Thank you Kristen 🙂
Aww thank you so much . Thank you for your kind words and encouragement ❤
What an amazing lady….one very strong lady!! If she can come back from a heart attack to run marathons, I think she’s got what it takes to go through this journey and come out the other side with flying colours. It is amazing how much awareness she has to what is going on considering she has not had therapy as yet. You’ll get there Hayley….you’ve got what it takes, all respect to you…..❤️
Thank you for your words Kate . I will always remember them . Thank you for helping me x
"No ones fought my corner ...." that has so resonated ... thank you Hayley 🤗
thank you ❤🙂 x
It's sad to think how much talent is not realized due to the circumstances people are born into that limits their potential. Hayley has a caring soul .Look forward to watching her healing as the sessions unfold.
thank you 🙂 ❤. x
As a counselling student, this is such a wonderful resource, thank you.
So glad its helpful Jill 🙂
Thank you Jill ! Yeah i think its so interesting . I’m a student too and if i can be 0.0001 % as good as Alex is at it , I will be pleased . :) Thank you
Great to see you back Alex missed watching In Therapy. Hayley thank you for sharing your journey you are worthy you have inner strength and I wish you well
Good to be back, thanks Bridget 🙂
Thank you so much Bridget . I wish you well too x x
Oh Hayley, your strength came through throughout! I really related to your pressures of feeling responsible for everyone else - I burned out at AGE 25 from that and it kind of saved me, too. I really hope that you can see and hear what Alex and others here see and believe about you for yourself, too. I BELIEVE IN YOU, HAYLEY. 💕
Thank you Hannah!
Thank you Hannah ! Sending you love and strength for your life too . Thank you x ❤
Boy, I've been awaiting your return, Alex. Missed your voice and presence and advice so so much over this summer..!!! Welcome back.
Nice to meet you Haley. I'm just beginning to watch, but, of course you are worthy !!!!
Thank you Dana, it's good to be back... sorry for the delays, but hopefully worth the wait!
@@AlexHowardTherapy ALWAYS worth the wait!!!! You've CHANGED my life, literally, and when you interviewed me in January of 2020, I'm pretty sure, not 2019?!?!?!!?, it was pivotal for my ongoing progress. Immense gratitude 🙏 ✨️
You’re a beautiful soul Hayley and so deserving of a wonderful, full life well done for respecting yourself enough to seek help and it’s helping others in the process by being able to watch your journey thank you and I wish all the love and joy ❤
thank you so much ❤. Sorry for late reply - i keep locking myself out of youtube and forgetting my password . 🙂 Thank you . I send you love 🙂
What a lovely lady, it really does come across that she has such a pure heart and such strength and resilience. I am glad to hear you have finally realised your worth x
what lovely encouraging comments . ❤. Thank you so much . I really needed that today . thank you . I do appreciate your words. thank you 🙂 x x
Hayley, you're awesome! (And like Alex said, that's not to make you feel better, it's just really obvious!)
I agree Beth :-)
Brave and admirable !
Aww Beth ❤ thank you x
@@feecockings2597 thank you 😊 ❤
Hayley, thank you for being so brave. We are both wonderful human beings. Hopefully one day we will both we able to accept and actually feel that in ourselves
🙂
Aww bless you Lorraine ! I agree . For the record ….You are amazing ! Thank you ❤
I am beyond words. Hayley, you are one of the strongest people I know to have survived this and had the courage to seek help through therapy.
Aww thank you so much ❤ . Thank you for taking the time to be so lovely and encouraging . Thank you x x
I really enjoyed this format. Congratulations to Hayley for being so brave and honest. The reset program has changed my life on my cfs journey, I highly recommend anyone struggling to take a look at the program.
Thank you so much :) . So pleased the programme has helped you too x
What an amazing and brave lady! I wish her all the best on her recovery 🧡
Thank you so much Kim . x x
thank you Kim . So appreciated x
@@hayley1473 not sure if you read the Toxic parents from Susan Forward - amazing book. Heavy book, of course, but very useful. It also tells that people who actually reach out for professional help are usually much more healthy as the rest of the family members - who negate all just to stay in comfort zone. How could toxicity be a comfort zone? :D :D yeah? big hug.
@@evabekesi8263 Thank you Eva ❤ Thank you - i will check the book out ! I agree . ❤. thank you x x
Wow, it made sense later, with the context, when you said about her being a strong willed character.
When Haley talked about how she could either become a recluse again or go out and run marathons, so she chose marathons and essentially told the anxiety and panic attacks ro f*k off, lol, I literally exclaimed "Holy SH#T!!" Lol! This lady is bad a$$!!
What a difference just a few ppl who really care and show it in what they do and say, can make in our lives. Friends mean so much. But even without friends or family we *must* work on knowing our worth as a human being, as a person, as a member of society despite what some might say or have said.
I wish Haley all the best on this journey. She's in good hands. I do love Alex's rapport with people, he was made for this role at The OHC.
Just one request (I'm not gonna let up! Ha! 😉) Can we pleeeeeeease have some CFS/M.E participants again soon pretty please?!
Thank you for your kind words :-). Just an FYI we are now uploading weekly new videos to the OHC UA-cam channel where we are focusing ME/CFS content!
Yes I would love to see an In Therapy season with someone with severe ME/CFS, housebound/bedbound and all the issues we deal with. Obviously it wouldn’t be able to be in person, but it wasnt during covid, so must be possible!
Thank you so much ❤❤ . So appreciated x
@@hayley1473 ❤ I only speak the truth! (Sometimes to my detriment 😂)
We are all rooting for you, Hayley! Xx
@@loobylouboti thank you ❤
This is very helpful, thank you.
You are welcome, thanks for watching!
a good session, some of what I can relate to and also needed to hear.
thank you ❤🙂 .
Another great session 💛
thank you ❤ x
Hayley you're amazing! 🥰
Thank you ! As are you ! 🥰❤
Take really really good care of yourself Hailey! Love yourself and be a good mama to the little girl in you. You're so strong, because you've had to be, but it's ok to allow yourself to be human as well; take a break once in a while from being strong, and let it go. Take a bath, drink a hot tea, go for a walk, all without being guarded and strong. It's exhausting, right?!
You're worthy, because we all are.
thank you so much ❤😊
Everyone has intrinsic worth
What inner strength and resilience Hayley! Brave and oh a plethora of positive words. Thank you so much for sharing such a personal journey. Also, you were pushed to your limit to run out in the street and shout…. the surrender… huge respect❤
I’ve only just found out about Alex Howard and this series. It’s so gently powerful and I’m grateful to everyone involved.
I’m going to watch episode 2 now.
Thank you ❤
Hi…so sorry that i missed your comment a few days ago ! Apologies . Thank you for your beautiful encouragement. Its so appreciated ❤😊 x
@@hayley1473 sincerely appreciate what you have done. And IF you stumble, you know it’s ok, forgive yourself and move forward again, gutsy lady 💗
@@ff2548 thank you xx
She is so cute when surprised at 37'10" :) fantastic woman! I hope when she reads these comments, realizes how many positive people will come to her life in the future. One of my favourite saying recenty is - You don't know the people yet, who will love you in the future. Because it can be a source of fear. But. We live in the present, and so true that our wellbeing is the most important - because we can be our own guardian. Thank you for sharing this video, I just realised that being over-grateful is also a trauma response, saying thank you for automatic things. Yoga helps the integration also, but only in a supportive environment - and she has seemingly won so many battles already.
thank you so much Eva - your comments are so lovely . ❤. I love your favourite saying - it’s so full of hope and so positive . Thank you for sharing that ! I love it . thank you 😊. I literally didnt realise that being over grateful was a trauma response until you actually said it - then i thought about ! Yes i see what you mean ! Thank you . Your post is so full of hope ❤ x x
@@hayley1473 you are always welcome, and I thank you as well ;) Im pretty sure we both will be all right, and just do fine. Alex is really wonderful, that he shared so many therapy discussions, there is still a lot of stigmatisation and fear and blame on therapy - while it should be so natural, like going to the dentist, really. So Im pretty proud of you, and admire your courage. Just smile every day in the mirror - and take your inner guardian to everywhere.
@@evabekesi8263 thank you so much ❤ sending love 🙂 x x
How often is an episode released?
Every Tuesday :-)
Sharing her mother's segment may help us in similar situation. Sad that you decided not to share it.
its shared in all the other episodes Esther, if you keep watching . It just took me a little bit of time to pluck up the courage to speak about some secrets , I have held for 45 years - so i couldn't just come out with them on the first occasion ,of being on camera with people i hadn’t met before in person - it was all too big and upsetting for me , on the very first session. So it was me that asked for privacy for a moment . I do share them openly as the sessions go on - so if you watch the other episodes they are there . Sorry
@@hayley1473 ok great. Thanks so much Hayley. I also have/had a similar mother issues too, so I'll watch out for yours in the subsequent episodes. Thanks so much for sharing these intimate moments with your therapist with us and the world. You're doing something really great! God bless you.
@@OmotEst aww i am sorry to hear you have had similar issues with your mother Esther 😞 . Its really hard isn’t it . I spent a lot of sleepless nights worrying about feeling like i had betrayed my mum by talking about her in therapy - I was just spending my life just trying to defend her . I think it took me a while to open up , and its stuff i am still working through . But thats ok . I am so sorry Esther for your issues too . I wish i could make it right for you and i’m sorry that i cant - but i do think Alex has some fantastic lessons within the therapy here , about all sorts of things like self care and boundaries and realising how precious you are - so i hope some of those really hit home for you . Because you are worthy , do deserve some protective boundaries and healing . I send you love . ❤ xx
13:07 my thought's at this point. Lovely woman. I wonder if the ocd means Hayley is taken care of by someone - something she never felt as a child.
Hi thank you so much - lovely thing to say thank you ! I wrote a big paragraph before about the ocd but it seems to of disappeared - sorry . Not sure if youtube flagged some words and removed it - i always seem to lose them . The ocd feels more like me having to take care of everyone else to be honest - i feel like i have to check over everyone and keep them safe . So not really anyone taking care of me - more me having to watch over , take care and keep them safe . Sorry if that doesnt make sense - my previous post that disappeared explained it better 🙂
@@hayley1473 I only watched to that point so far. Will watch more and see how things go
I was referring to the comment i dont do cooking, banking or any grown up stuff.
@@lindsay5305 sorry i wrote an explanation and it got removed again - i must write some words that automatically get my comments deleted on here . I keep trying to explain what i mean and it disappears (lol) . I was being a bit self - deprecating in my comments there - i do do grown up stuff - but re check it several times due to my obsessive compulsive disorder - and my childhood upsets . I’m sorry i cant explain it further here - i’m not sure what words i am saying that get flagged up - but my comments keep disappearing sorry . So i have given up trying to write my reasons sorry. x 🙂
@@hayley1473 You neither have to explain or reply.
I have that issue too. I have learned to copy a comment before posting incase it doesnt upload.
⚘
❤ x
The way she defended the mother right away was a massive red flag for me. This happens so often in situations of abuse.
Hi …thanks for your thoughts . I was being nosy and noticed your comment - 🙂 . Thanks to Alex and his help here ,things are so different now in our relationship . It took a while , but we got there in the end and it was worth it 🙂 ❤ thank you x
@@hayley1473 That's great! So far I've only watched the first episode, so I don't know any details yet but it was very interesting to watch and right now I'm in episode 2 where you seem to be told about a totally new evaluation of the situation. We get very used to what we know as our "normal" and it's not so easy to accept a different concept but sometimes that brings all the change we have always hoped for.
@@magnanilanguages154 ahh thank you 🙂 . At the risk of spoiling the ending 😂, myself and mum get on so much better now a year on . Utter miracle ❤🙂. Thank you x
@@hayley1473 great to hear!
@@magnanilanguages154 thank you ❤🙂
Can you plz add English subtitles that enable non native person to understand the speech??? Thanks!!!
hi - sorry about that - i know i have a really strong accent from where i come from - apologies
Theres a transcript below
If you click on 'more' under the title of the video, there's a 'Transcript' section. All of the text is there. You can scroll and read as you watch and listen. As an aside, I'm a non-native speaker and didn't find the accent to be an issue. Either way no apology required 😉
thank you 😊 ❤ x @@yelenairwin1717
Interesting...watching the body language tells a lot about the therapist/klient relation.....
so true :)
I think Alex is so good at what he does …I just felt safe and understood :)
18:50 heartbreaking comment
30:07 who said youre a stu_id child? If it was a parent, that explains why you think you dont deserve love
I think you have some autism traits. The slow process time for instance. 😊
ahh interesting thanks . 🙂 . I am always interested in hearing different perspectives. Thank you . To be really honest , i dont think my slow processing time is down to autism - i dont think i actually have a slow processing time . I think at the time i just believed what i had been told all my life , without question , and i ran with that narrative - looking back now i see it so differently , and realise it isnt true . Because my mind is calmer my processing time is really fine - i think it always was - there were just too many tabs open on my mithered mind - and as a result of stress - i was just getting a lot of thoughts in one go . Thankfully much slower now thanks to Alex and his team 🙂. Interestingly i worked as an assessor for children with autism in a children’s residential home and school . I score low on autistic traits but high on ocd . But it is an interesting perspective and i do thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts . thank you . 🙂
@@hayley1473 What you say makes sense.
@@lindsay5305 😊