How Not Having Romantic Relationships In School Affected Your Adult Life - TikTok Comp | Reaction

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  • Опубліковано 29 жов 2021
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    Instagram: deeshanell ( deeshanell)
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    How Not Having Romantic Relationships In School Affected Your Adult Life - TikTok Comp | Reaction
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 296

  • @blueiris1542
    @blueiris1542 2 роки тому +493

    "I've been knowing my boyfriend since I was 5"
    "You a unicorn" 😂😂

    • @kylelee5966
      @kylelee5966 2 роки тому +4

      wow

    • @red_boum
      @red_boum 2 роки тому +26

      Ridiculously small town check!

    • @diamondmarie9490
      @diamondmarie9490 2 роки тому +20

      Plot Twist: It's her cousin and she lives in Alabama

  • @user-qk2lo9iy4r
    @user-qk2lo9iy4r 2 роки тому +498

    best choice i've ever made was to stay away from guys in school . I dodged so many bullets tho.

    • @musaviki783
      @musaviki783 2 роки тому +90

      I watched so many people go through hell and back in high school🥴

    • @denee7488
      @denee7488 2 роки тому +14

      Same sis same

    • @KDbelieves
      @KDbelieves 2 роки тому +53

      Me! It negativly affected me, but its way more positive.
      I don't have a heart break story and I can see a fuck boy from a mile away. After seeing so many of my friends get played, It's easy to spot.

    • @KDbelieves
      @KDbelieves 2 роки тому +12

      @Will Clauson yeap. I really want to find someone, but it's hard to do it when the vast majority of people are toxic and you can see their toxicity on first glance. It's kind of a blessing and a curse. Hopefully I'll find my somebody one day.

    • @jakendriajenkins3902
      @jakendriajenkins3902 2 роки тому +4

      Facts……,thats why i was chasing girls 🥴🏃🏾‍♀️😂😂😭😭

  • @RubidiumMoon
    @RubidiumMoon 2 роки тому +391

    Never dated, never kissed, never done nothing until tomorrow and honestly it really isn’t that big of a deal. There is this feeling of missing out, but after seeing all the shit others have gone through, I’m glad I waited until I was in a right mindset. I’m a 21 year old asian woman btw.

    • @Goldenxbih
      @Goldenxbih 2 роки тому +18

      Same except I’m a 16 yr old Nigerian girl lol

    • @destinymcgowan5328
      @destinymcgowan5328 2 роки тому +19

      Same except I'm a 21 year old Black woman

    • @lunron9548
      @lunron9548 2 роки тому +1

      @@destinymcgowan5328 same

    • @BrokieTheJokie
      @BrokieTheJokie 2 роки тому +5

      Same but I'm a 19 year old mexican boy

    • @ev2175
      @ev2175 2 роки тому

      😲

  • @Alex_Hampshire
    @Alex_Hampshire 2 роки тому +190

    I feel like Dee can’t relate to this because she has never felt unwanted or unloved romantically or has dealt with rejection multiple times.
    I am a 23 year old man and although I’m used to it, I still feel lonely sometimes. I have thought about the possibility of being single and unwanted for the rest of my life. I don’t want to be, but it’s possible.

    • @xael3274
      @xael3274 2 роки тому +32

      Anything is possible but you're kind of echoing what Dee said. As humans, we don't want to be alone forever and going out of your way to be alone to avoid rejection or convincing yourself that you don't want a romantic or sexual connection is just not healthy.

    • @nisarojas2869
      @nisarojas2869 2 роки тому +13

      @@xael3274 all three of you have a point

    • @Jess-ew3tm
      @Jess-ew3tm 2 роки тому +7

      Well you’re only 23… you’re gonna grow up and evolve

    • @Feber2001
      @Feber2001 2 роки тому +1

      @@xael3274 It is. If you have deep rooted trauma with attachment or romantic relationships, it is best to stay alone....until your wounds are healed with therapy. For me, that'll probably be for the rest of my life. Alone😅

  • @darryldope157
    @darryldope157 2 роки тому +182

    not all humans are the same, a lot of people do not crave companionship. romantic relationships isn't a necessity for everyone.

    • @xxarianahiltonxx5116
      @xxarianahiltonxx5116 2 роки тому +25

      Yeah. But if you truly aren't interested in romantic relationships, why get defensive just because no one ever showed you romantic attention? That's a bit odd to me. Like I understand some people are actually like that. I have family members and friends who never were in relationships and are loving life without it. They never complained that no one was interested in them. I'm just wondering if some people in the video that said those things are actually hurt.

    • @brave4not
      @brave4not 2 роки тому +28

      @@xxarianahiltonxx5116 I understand where they're coming from. It's like when you are asked to go out with friends and you don't actually want to go, but you're still flattered that they asked because that shows they think you're fun to be around. But if nobody even bothers to ask you, you'd still feel a little weird, even though it doesn't make any sense to feel that way because you know that you didn't want to go. It's the same cognitive dissonance.

    • @darryldope157
      @darryldope157 2 роки тому +1

      @@xxarianahiltonxx5116 what your are saying makes sense.

    • @disappointment2657
      @disappointment2657 2 роки тому +2

      @@xxarianahiltonxx5116 yeah they shouldn't complain about it, if the want to be alone. But I think most of the girls in the video want to be with someone. Coz when you really don't want to be with anyone it doesn't bother you why people are not into you

    • @chanelnorth1785
      @chanelnorth1785 2 роки тому

      @@xxarianahiltonxx5116 you're right. I never understood the "I don't want to go but I at least wanted to be invited" type of people. Seems very egotistical and selfish.

  • @jinxie712
    @jinxie712 2 роки тому +144

    From a guy’s perspective, it was getting shot out of the sky before taking off. I didn’t even get to the rejection stage because I was made to feel I shouldn’t even try. Now I don’t even notice when a woman is showing interest while having a conversation with her. It’s all hindsight. I notice coworkers because I see them daily and have the next interaction. But, in the moment, it just feels like they see something wrong with me.

    • @KaosGamer11234
      @KaosGamer11234 2 роки тому +10

      Bro from 17yr old in high school rn I know the feeling, I’ve never been desired by anybody and it hurts but at the same time it’s made me feel that I don’t need to be in a relationship

    • @imaniluvsu1
      @imaniluvsu1 2 роки тому +9

      Some of them are fixated which is very unhealthy. Why focus on what you didn't have in the past when you have an entire future. I'm only applying that to this particular situation.
      And I don't think that last girl really knows the weight of what she's saying.
      She's only 22. She has no idea what life might have in store for her yet she seems to believe that she'd be just fine if she never had another relationship.
      She's too young to know that.

    • @jinxie712
      @jinxie712 2 роки тому +3

      @@KaosGamer11234 thing is, keep your head on a swivel. When I said “It’s all hindsight”, that goes back to high school as well. There are times when a moment hits me and I go “wait”. Women are like the Riddler and think you are Batman. Their “signs” of showing interest are like intricate puzzles.

    • @123newjersey3
      @123newjersey3 2 роки тому +1

      Girls: trying to find out if a guy likes them
      Guys: ong they are puzzlemasters and witches, why can't they just tell me
      Guy: *never asks out a girl*

    • @imaniluvsu1
      @imaniluvsu1 2 роки тому +2

      @@123newjersey3 I think that alot of people are afraid of rejection.
      But if don't try you won't know.
      If you like a girl at the very least find ways to get to know her. Maybe you share common interests and that might be a good way to ask her out.
      But even if you don't and you still like her then ask her about the most interesting thing about her and offer a date that way.
      There's nothing wrong with learning new things.

  • @MrCAppiah
    @MrCAppiah 2 роки тому +69

    "Look she talking more in a different location" LMAO

    • @cadyg2531
      @cadyg2531 2 роки тому +8

      The way I snickered 😂🤦🏾‍♀️🤣 Dee is so funny unintentionally 😂

  • @TheDjmoney99
    @TheDjmoney99 2 роки тому +181

    4:08 her dad definitely told her that to make her feel better for never being asked out. Men don’t look at women and immediately ascertain if they’re “independent” or not and use that as a means to not pursue anything lmao. Cap detectors are off the charts

    • @deshaun_thewise
      @deshaun_thewise 2 роки тому +33

      Exactly bruh. Our generation of men ain't finna turn down a independent woman over a female that's pocket watching and begging. She just busted and her pops trying to make her feel better.

    • @briannaex8627
      @briannaex8627 2 роки тому +9

      @@deshaun_thewise shes actually really pretty but another ugly person would feel that way if theyve been rejected so kich

    • @imaniluvsu1
      @imaniluvsu1 2 роки тому +27

      I don't know if he was lying to her or if he was telling her that based on men he's spoken to or their sons. Maybe he even did that as a way to deflect her interest in dating because he was being overprotective.
      Either way, he's nor completely wrong nor is he completely right.
      There ARE men out there just like that. Some of them don't even do that intentionally. Or at least consciously. It just ends up that way.
      On the other hand there are men who LOVE independent women.
      At the end of the day in a partnership you're going to take care of each OTHER. It won't be 50/50. Sometimes one person will give more than the other based on needs at the time.
      If at any time a person is giving too much all the time, then that's when it becomes unhealthy.

    • @lugmediaclub1645
      @lugmediaclub1645 2 роки тому +3

      @@crowing3886 Nah, she's talking about men not approaching her.

    • @TheDjmoney99
      @TheDjmoney99 2 роки тому +5

      @@imaniluvsu1 naw he’s completely wrong. To say she’s never been asked out by ANYBODY simply because she radiates “independent bitch energy” is the highest dose of self copium lmao

  • @bruhan1m3
    @bruhan1m3 2 роки тому +74

    7:44 SPEAK ON IT!!! I can relate to that, it just doesnt matter after a while because you give up and just live life

    • @kewi.
      @kewi. 2 роки тому +8

      Yeah i didnt relate to much of these opinions because a few years ago when i was in high school i never actively sought out a relationship. It was just never on the forefront of my mind. And now as a young adult (20) I feel like when i wanted to find a relationship I easily did so. idk 🤷🏻‍♂️

    • @briannaex8627
      @briannaex8627 2 роки тому +5

      @@kewi. plus I think highschool guys are kinda crappy they too need time to develop, the girls arent much better though either

    • @kewi.
      @kewi. 2 роки тому +9

      @@briannaex8627 i feel like high school guys are just like a cult of children that dare each other to do things 😭

  • @mosesjay3862
    @mosesjay3862 2 роки тому +96

    Dee’s at rolling loud and still dropping vids😭 grind go crazy

  • @kimberly1271
    @kimberly1271 2 роки тому +63

    Dee’s response is very dismissive and did not address the main point of the video. These women are expressing lack of romantic interest from men. Men may approach women but doesn’t mean they desire a romantic relationship with a woman. As one of the girls stated modern day dating is very causal. Not all men but many men will sleep with women, but actually investing time and getting to know someone is where they draw the line. Dating in modern western society is very backwards. People are more willing to open up sexually before emotionally. Romantic or intimacy is rooted in emotional connection.

    • @joshuabertrand9277
      @joshuabertrand9277 2 роки тому +1

      While I agree that men will sleep with women without getting to know women, women also allow men to do that by having one night stands and hot girl summers. In fact, I would say that the reason why men are like that now started with the concept of it being okay to have sex before marriage, and later, the concept of casual sex. If women, as a whole, stopped giving sex so easily, men would have to change.

    • @pearlcnrd
      @pearlcnrd 2 роки тому

      @@joshuabertrand9277 no, people have been having premarital sex for hundreds of years, what is happening now is that people are pushing for it to be recognised as something normal and nothing to be ashamed of especially when there is still a rampant sexist ideology behind how one night stands are just that for men but women are whores for the same thing.
      Then we can get into the very creepy innocence debate for women when they are expected to remain virgins especially in religious environment while that same expectations is not held up for men. Or we can even talk about the creepy hyper sexualised commentary little boys are exposed to at such young ages.
      Men just like you have been conditioned to think well if they're allowing sex to happen then these issues are null and void.
      Having sexual intercourse is a completely natural and not weird thing to partake in. If you as a person see people as sex objects that is a you problem that needs to be fixed, and it has nothing to do with people specifically women being open about having sex and enjoying it.

    • @pearlcnrd
      @pearlcnrd 2 роки тому

      @@joshuabertrand9277 it is not up to women to stop doing something for men to use their brains, you're demeaning the entire male sex and basically saying they can not think with anything other than their penises.
      Stop thinking about people as sex objects.

    • @joshuabertrand9277
      @joshuabertrand9277 2 роки тому

      @@pearlcnrd men are using their brains to adapt.

    • @lelelew2735
      @lelelew2735 7 місяців тому

      ​@@joshuabertrand9277this is not true

  • @LaurynLo
    @LaurynLo 2 роки тому +60

    Idk you’re kinda dismissive about this topic. Maybe you just cant relate.. but idk i dont like your vibe about it✌🏾

    • @Emma-kx9pq
      @Emma-kx9pq 2 роки тому +30

      Honestly I didn't expect people to be so dismissive about it neither. It's like people who can't relate don't understand.
      It was way more compassion under the actual compilation video.

    • @milkywaystarmoon
      @milkywaystarmoon Рік тому

      ​@@Emma-kx9pq yes because people in this situation are extremely rare.
      All people (a super big percent) have been desired, that's why having relationship in high school is the "norm".
      So they cannot even immagin what it's feel being in this situation.

    • @Emma-kx9pq
      @Emma-kx9pq Рік тому

      @@milkywaystarmoon Why speak on it if you just don't see it from any angle at all then

    • @milkywaystarmoon
      @milkywaystarmoon Рік тому +1

      ​@@Emma-kx9pq because we are human and she is not is therapist.
      If I never been in that specific situation I will never know how is it.
      I don't think that she wanted to offend anyone but for sure you can understand that she dosn't really know how is to be invisible, alone and seeing everyone of your friend in relationship.

  • @jailyn5085
    @jailyn5085 2 роки тому +171

    This video was kinda weird to me. I didn’t really get asked out in school. I mean, there were some guys that liked me but I don’t think I was their first choice. So I definitely developed some self esteem issues from that. But I thought it was interesting how a lot of those girls said they grew up and didn’t desire a relationship. Like I grew up the complete opposite. Thinking about relationships took/takes up quite a large portion of my life. Even now at 20 and in college, I’m constantly thinking about finding someone to be in a healthy relationship with. I’ve never been in an actual relationship before. I’ve been with a few guys…kinda abusive tbh. And I think my acceptance of that behavior from them was a direct result of not having romantic interactions earlier in life.

    • @shayfripp9118
      @shayfripp9118 2 роки тому +4

      omg i feel the same way and im 16 about to turn 17

    • @imaniluvsu1
      @imaniluvsu1 2 роки тому +7

      I don't think you were in abusive situations based on not dating.
      That would be taking blame for someone treating you like shit. It's not your fault.
      Abusers know exactly who to attract to them because they're predatory and sometimes we just don't see it coming.
      But if you know what's not healthy in ANY relationship and that includes family and friends then you're more likely to recognize negative or positive patterns in potential mates.
      And always follow your intuition. It will never lead you wrong.

    • @jailyn5085
      @jailyn5085 2 роки тому +8

      @@imaniluvsu1 yeah, I suppose you’re right. I just tend to attract more abusive guys and I know I look like the perfect target really because of my social anxiety and low self esteem. And those things are directly related to my lack of attention from my peers in my formative years. That’s what I was trying to say. That’s definitely not a reason why someone should be a terrible person and treat me horribly, but some people are just not great.

    • @Quentin_314
      @Quentin_314 2 роки тому

      @@shayfripp9118 check back in 10 years

    • @lisah3460
      @lisah3460 2 роки тому +1

      You're only 20. Chill.

  • @Sonic-hq9zz
    @Sonic-hq9zz 2 роки тому +20

    I just graduated high school and I’ve never had a romantic relationship before. The most I’ve ever did was hug.

  • @rafaelgarcia577
    @rafaelgarcia577 2 роки тому +22

    As a guy, who is in this position, I realized that I’m not ready to be in one, because (hopefully) most relationships require 3 important things: patience, time, and communication. I don’t have the required patience to be in a relationship, nor do I communicate well, and I’m still working on that.
    It also cost less to go out, especially in North Carolina.

  • @Nene_760
    @Nene_760 2 роки тому +80

    "You a unicorn" lmao how does Dee come up with this stuff 💀 😂

  • @joshuabertrand9277
    @joshuabertrand9277 2 роки тому +35

    All of these perspectives were from women, but it sometimes happens to men too, although my situation is a bit different. So for me, I was sexually abused many times when I was a kid by a teenager girl who was supposed to be in high school but she failed several times. I also grew up in a non-American but black family which didn't believe in therapy. Fast forward to senior year in high school, I still had no romantic relationships. There was a girl who asked me to prom in high school, but I declined, and one girl did begin to walk with me everywhere but then told me that she was "breaking up with me" because I didn't act like a boyfriend. But at the time, I just had never interacted with the opposite gender (other than mother) except when I was a kid and abused, so I was awkward. And if alone with a girl, I would ignore her as a defense mechanism as well as being physically repulsed by the idea of anything sexual or romantic. Now, as an adult, I still don't understand the social cues of a woman trying to be nice or flirting. I've learned how to interact with most women by watching other people over the years, except if it's a girl I really like. I'll know I like a girl but if she begins to get close, I'll ignore, act cold, be short, and when in person, actually hate being around her. I know as an adult, now, I can bring myself to therapy and like Dee alluded, I don't want to be alone when I get older. But at the same time, it's not a priority. Like one girl says in the video, when you've been without such relationships for so long, you just accept it now.

    • @imaniluvsu1
      @imaniluvsu1 2 роки тому +11

      I'm so sorry that happened to you.
      If you haven't gone to therapy I really would ask that you give it a chance. Not all therapists are alike so if you find one that doesn't work out try a different one.
      It would be sad for you to miss out on a good relationship because of your trauma. There's someone out there for you and YOU deserve love.
      Again I'm sorry you experienced that and thank you for sharing that.

  • @Jaythebeliever13
    @Jaythebeliever13 2 роки тому +75

    The comment about never wanting to take care of someone is the exact reason why so many people are single. Relationships are literally about the other person. If you go in thinking only about what they can do for you or without realizing the work, you will hand over the power of your happiness to another person. Take happiness from being able to do things for someone you care about. That’s the only way happiness can be replenished anytime you crave it

    • @alwaysannoyedforever518
      @alwaysannoyedforever518 2 роки тому +10

      I don’t really think that’s what that girl meant. Do you want to be in a relationship with someone who is constantly draining you and expecting you to do everything for them? No lol. Taking care of someone in a partnership and taking care of your child are two different things. And nobody wants the latter in a partnership.

    • @Jaythebeliever13
      @Jaythebeliever13 2 роки тому +1

      @@alwaysannoyedforever518 Explain to me what is so draining? Maybe you are expected to cook some meals, schedule some appointments , put clothes in a washer and dryer just examples. Anything worthwhile requires work to maintain. When you’re in a relationship you don’t do things because the other person cannot do for themselves it’s because you care enough to try and make their life easier.

    • @akemisasaki1182
      @akemisasaki1182 2 роки тому +7

      @@alwaysannoyedforever518 Yeah, I was thinking the same thing. I think people can only understand what the girl meant, sometimes, when they actually experience it. The drainage is real...

    • @akemisasaki1182
      @akemisasaki1182 2 роки тому +9

      @@Jaythebeliever13 Sorry to intrude on your conversation ^ ^'.. What he and the girl mean is when you're being made to do EVERYTHING and your partner literally wants you to be their Mom or Dad. It's especially worse when you have a child with that person and yet they're still behaving like a child their self. It's very real and can be extremely draining. It's hard to escape the cycle your "partner" put you through along with the relationship at that point because you're too mentally and sometimes physically drained.
      Some examples you listed are fine and such but they can, and should, go both ways. But the case the person above and the girl mentioned are when it isn't shown both ways. It's when one person is doing it even when they need to be doing something else more important while the "partner" is enjoying life lounging on the couch and watching tv all the time or out with their friends 24/7.
      It's draining when your "partner" calls you from the couch they're chilling on to go warm them up a tv dinner even when you were taking a quick rest, sleeping, or eating yourself. They're right next to the kitchen, but has to call you repeatedly out of your sleep to tend to them. That's a man/woman child. I can list so many examples if you want, but hopefully this is enough so you can see their point.
      It's true, when you're in a relationship, you do things to show you care and to help out. It's important to help the other person as well if they can't do something though. BUT, it goes both ways. It's draining and becomes a problem when you're the only one putting in the effort and trying. When the other person is always demanding something of you or giving orders (not a request), that's when there's a problem.
      Thank you, and sorry that this was long.

    • @alwaysannoyedforever518
      @alwaysannoyedforever518 2 роки тому +3

      @@akemisasaki1182 exactly this

  • @niiyyah
    @niiyyah 2 роки тому +10

    7:57 yes Dee that’s the one where you said “chapstick will find you”😭😭

  • @paulreyes6221
    @paulreyes6221 2 роки тому +56

    0:30 Dee and her voices crack me up lmaooo. She needs to get a voice acting gig or something

  • @ryanleonidas6839
    @ryanleonidas6839 2 роки тому +103

    It’s depends on the person everyone is different.

  • @jerrynospringer2516
    @jerrynospringer2516 2 роки тому +77

    that lady might not have been lying when she said she can go her whole life without a romantic relationship. I had the same experience, and I feel the same way. People don’t NEED a partner, they just need human interaction. And maybe sex. But a relationship isn’t, like, a need. Like if I’m looking for “romantic” attention at this point, it’s just for sex, not an actual relationship and after that happens you get the post-nut clarity and wanna leave ASAP lmao. not having that romantic attention and watching everyone else get it all the way up until adulthood made me feel like I really jus wasn’t desirable and a whole ass clown bc I TRIED to be desirable 😂😂 now that I’ve had a lil glow up, ppl actually show genuine interest in me- thirst even, at times and it jus confirmed to me how shallow ppl are and I kno that’s human, but now I’m shallow asf and noncommittal, trust no one and show affection so very terribly inconsistent. I know I’d be a terrible partner because I’m just so okay with NOT having a partner to the point where I’d constantly desire to be single and free of the dependence.
    Like when Drake said I only love my bed and my mama, im sorry I felt that 😔 I think it can definitely work in the opposite way tho, like once somebody who’s never been showed attention finally snags someone they may never want to let em go.

    • @123newjersey3
      @123newjersey3 2 роки тому +8

      nah u sound hurt g

    • @jinxie712
      @jinxie712 2 роки тому +7

      I thought the same until my mom was in a coma and saw my dad at her side in the hospital.

    • @daithishepherd2756
      @daithishepherd2756 2 роки тому +2

      I don't know what to do with this information lol

    • @disappointment2657
      @disappointment2657 2 роки тому +11

      I feel the same way. But people will call me names if I say it outloud. Like now someone said are you hurt? Like no bro I just hate relationships and living with someone in one roof. I'm not lonely I just want to be alone.

    • @jerrynospringer2516
      @jerrynospringer2516 2 роки тому +5

      @@daithishepherd2756 .. u don’t have to do anything with it, ain even have to comment lol. I was talking to Dee bc she said the girl was lying to herself

  • @jadaalston3280
    @jadaalston3280 2 роки тому +29

    I have to say that as someone who has went through this, the last girl is not lying to herself. Because I was isolated from romantic relationships and wasn’t asked out I can’t pick up when someone likes me. I just think there being nice. Because i never went through that period in my teens I don’t really think about having a relationship. Like it doesn’t cross my mind. When this happens to people in general you have this idea of “no one is ever going to ask me out” so you tend to not even think about it as much. It’s becomes like an absolute thought. Even if it’s not true and someone could possibly like me i never see it that way. So it causes me to not even look for relationships.

  • @BigElly12
    @BigElly12 2 роки тому +12

    I never dated my whole school life until after graduation when a friend of mine talked me into “putting myself out there” and made a dating account for me. I’ll never take her advice again. Those “dates” and what occurred between them have brought me shame, trauma, and lost time and some hard lessons of life. Now I’ll never be able to take back those events but I wouldn’t trade those lessons for anything in the world. I’ve never been more secure than I am right now I’m so glad I never dated in high school because I wouldn’t have wanted business to spread to classmates like they usually do. And yea. Some of these people and Dee are speaking facts.

  • @BoosGaming1
    @BoosGaming1 2 роки тому +15

    4:09 Girl no one was attracted to YOOU Period! Energy has nothing to do with it 🤦‍♀️ bless her father for comforting his child

  • @seoulrainme
    @seoulrainme 2 роки тому +35

    Tbh, i get flirted with a lot, but my taste in men is so jacked, that I don’t really respond correctly to the flirting if that makes sense?… I have a type that I like, but I’m not close minded, but if you aren’t really fitting my type then I tend to not try and progress things further. But with me also having a type, I am also letting myself down in a way because I am expecting certain things to happen with that said person, but it usually doesn’t end up that way. But moral of the story, I get flirted with so much that I just take it as a compliment and leave it at that. I don’t really try to engage in trying to get to know someone more anymore, because I don’t want to mess around and be stuck in a situation I could’ve avoided to begin with.

    • @putaromason5234
      @putaromason5234 2 роки тому +1

      And there really isn't any wrong reason of thinking like that because my situation is very similar to yours despite the letting myself go because I know I am very aware of how I come across and how I respond to things.

    • @imaniluvsu1
      @imaniluvsu1 2 роки тому +1

      You shouldn't put expectations on people because they'll always let you down.
      The best thing you can do is know what you want in a relationship, what your boundaries are and let that guide you.
      You can't avoid everything but you can definitely avoid red flags.
      But don't let that stop you from dating and just having fun.

  • @Draye
    @Draye 2 роки тому +36

    The f'd part is that I've dealt with girls who treated my interest in them like it's a joke so i just lose interest in wanting to date them and even being friends with them it's kinda sad

    • @shera4276
      @shera4276 2 роки тому

      What r ur interests? Are they like odd?

    • @deshaun_thewise
      @deshaun_thewise 2 роки тому +7

      @@shera4276 his interest means his want to date them. Not actual interest or hobbies

    • @imaniluvsu1
      @imaniluvsu1 2 роки тому +2

      It's sad. They dont realize by having those attitudes they're keeping themselves from the very thing that they want.

  • @izikmoreno7107
    @izikmoreno7107 2 роки тому +4

    I’m 18 going on 19 and still haven’t experienced anything. I’m kind of glad because I have more knowledge of what can and cannot happen. But, there is a part of me that does regret not trying to have a romantic relationship with someone. It really does take a toll on your mental health and clouds your judgment on a lot of things not even related to romantic relationships. You get more defensive about little things which comes off as dramatic to others when to you it really bothers you. I know I’m a bit young to be even talking about this but my siblings and friends have had lots of romantic relationships and they are younger than me. So by what I’ve seen I’m mostly glad now that I know I can put myself out there whenever I’m ready instead of trying to show others that I have experiences as well. Not having that type of attention can have a somewhat negative impact on your potential future relationships. But all that matters is you do what you want when YOUR ready, don’t do anything on someone else’s time. It’s your time and your choosing to spend it more prepared, especially if it’s comfortable for you.

  • @ruemissm6800
    @ruemissm6800 2 роки тому +15

    I never had the chance to date because I had strict parents and my entire primary & highschool was spent being bulliedv& depressed. I developed a hard exterior to point where when I got to university people just wouldn't approach me or I didn't find anyone attractive.. .. My experience is when I finally decided to open up and date.. A guy took advantage of me, brutally took my virginity and verbally abused me... So I'm now doing my Masters and have decided not to get married, stay celibate, childless and single till death do me part 😅 .. Maybe later in life when I can afford therapy I'll change my mind. But as for now.. My main priorities are finishing Masters and getting a good career.

  • @cheyennepredium9860
    @cheyennepredium9860 2 роки тому +43

    I would definitely say this is my experience, and I can sympathize and relate to the women in these videos. But I agree with Dee that it’s not healthy to lie and say that we never want intimacy, on the other hand repeating “I’m fine on my own. I don’t need to be in a relationship”, etc. to ourselves is what can help us get through those difficult emotions. I feel that as long as us women who are dealing with this issue acknowledge that’s these phrases aren’t entirely true, then we won’t fully believe in them and then they can’t be so detrimental to us. I can also relate to the points made in the video about not having a strong desire to actively pursue romantic relationships, but more so because I view it as too difficult to try. I believe that it’s a unspoken consensus among the women who share this experience that we could be the best version of ourselves, have everything going well in our lives, and still never be approached romantically, and in the end that’s just how its going to be. So I think that’s where the “I don’t even wanna try” attitude stems from. It’s not pessimistic, but a realistic possibility. But yeah these are just some of my thoughts.

  • @AirAnimeAngel
    @AirAnimeAngel 2 роки тому +15

    Honestly,in my case unlike these ladies,I shot my shot a couple of times,asked men out,but they only saw me as a friend,which is fine.Over time I got tired though,because I found myself investing my time only in finding friends and relationships and getting no feedback. I`m 24 and never been in a relationship. And that bit about being fine with it is true,because that`s my sentiment right now,albeit against my wishes.I just had to get used to it,though I go hot and cold when it comes to me craving that romance. So yeah,it`s like a wave where I really want that companionship and closeness and then it passes.

  • @iamnonexistent3762
    @iamnonexistent3762 2 роки тому +12

    tbh I've never craved to be in a relationship. if I ever have it's just because I'm horny, but the idea of having a partner doesn't interest me and tbh I'm okay with never being in a relationship. is that weird? like, I ain't saying that I'd turn down the idea of being in a relationship forever, but I just don't see the importance of it. it just seems like too much work. I'd much rather focus on other things and spend my time alone or with friends.

  • @pinkturtle2016
    @pinkturtle2016 Рік тому

    I can relate to the people in the tiktoks, and if anything, not having any relationship experience in middle/high school has helped me realize that I don't need a relationship in order to be happy etc.

  • @khinezarthwe8923
    @khinezarthwe8923 2 роки тому +6

    It's not only about lying themselves to just feel better. for god sake!..they just poured out their dissapointments and desires to feel loved...
    it's so HARD and heartbreaking to see them as someone who can relate to them damn much..As u can't just say someone 'Be happy' to a depressive guy, u can't also just say ''Be confident and go for what u want' to whom have always been self-sabotaged and never feel wanted! Guys.don't take every girl weird and leave them.. Some of us really need someone to understand that weak point and patience to open up ourselves..

  • @lyrasan5659
    @lyrasan5659 2 роки тому +28

    Me being Muslim and asexual: 😃

  • @StreamNewYork
    @StreamNewYork 2 роки тому +4

    The fact you keep uploading one video a day is beginning to upset me and my home girls lol

  • @AV218_
    @AV218_ 2 роки тому +15

    7:15 Bruhh, 😂she’s from that video “What’s something you’ll get hate for if you say it out loud (part 3)” Here’s the link to Dee’s reaction 🤣 ua-cam.com/video/POOqtNdfIfU/v-deo.html

  • @TBT707
    @TBT707 2 роки тому +1

    I agree to this so much, when i went to high school i had a crush on someone who didnt treat me right, but luckily i left. But after that it somewhat had a opposite affect on me,I started having a better view of myself and i sorta crave a relationship but im really scared of being used again and im so used to being the silent girl in the sidelines just having a crush.

  • @bravenewworld5824
    @bravenewworld5824 2 роки тому +5

    I never had no attention in school but when I stopped going to that school and started meeting up with friends when they finished for the day. All the boys that didn't like me were dribbling over me. So even before I was legit I made up for the lack the attention 😂🤦🏾‍♀️

  • @CoachKev0731
    @CoachKev0731 2 роки тому +1

    Man this just reminds me of that old saying, "If you could go back and tell your younger self something, what would it be?"

  • @ashleyhumphries9941
    @ashleyhumphries9941 Рік тому +3

    I wish another youtuber whose also been through this could have covered this topic.

  • @yungoreoz
    @yungoreoz 2 роки тому

    I’m honestly in the same situation. I’m in my freshman year of college. Never done anything romantic in my life and I get what they mean to a degree. I’m definitely unable to receive signals that other people can see very easily when it comes to relationships. Also, I truly do think that it helped me to develop a lot of my independence but as a human you obviously need connection so to all of them who said they don’t want a relationship or can go their whole life without one are capping hard.

  • @LIBRAGOD90
    @LIBRAGOD90 2 роки тому +12

    I just be busy for relationships but don't get me wrong I get approached lol 😅

  • @kingmerck1538
    @kingmerck1538 2 роки тому +43

    I’m sorry, but I cringe when women always complain about taking care of their husband/partner, if you really care about your other half you’d think it would be natural to take care of each other.

    • @123newjersey3
      @123newjersey3 2 роки тому +35

      women shouldn't have to take care of their partners like babies my nigga. go find a mom if you want that, no one wanna be washing all their shit, clothes, taking the car for repairs, fixing your shit, dishes, cooking, cleaning, telling em how to dress/take care of skin/smell, then sitting there and babying them when they get mad n shit. g thats a whole ass kid my guy 😂😂

    • @gaelgriffith8175
      @gaelgriffith8175 2 роки тому +14

      @@123newjersey3 do you understand what taking care of each other means?

    • @kingmerck1538
      @kingmerck1538 2 роки тому +3

      @@123newjersey3 but y’all expect us to be providers

    • @kingmerck1538
      @kingmerck1538 2 роки тому +6

      @@123newjersey3 I’m not talking about house chores🙄

    • @123newjersey3
      @123newjersey3 2 роки тому +4

      @@kingmerck1538 who is yall my guy 😂😂 tf wa u talking about then

  • @Realtalk24625
    @Realtalk24625 2 роки тому +3

    “Men don’t like you because you’re independent “… then she goes on to say “ Men want women that will take care of them”…. That didn’t make any sense because an independent woman would have the means to do so.. I don’t think she thought that out

  • @BENZ_ASMR
    @BENZ_ASMR Рік тому

    “It will naturally come to you” that’s what they all say🥲💯

  • @NeverGiveUp10069
    @NeverGiveUp10069 2 роки тому +5

    Damn real shit dee

  • @chasehlee7197
    @chasehlee7197 2 роки тому +4

    This is a lot of men’s whole life. The only things we get are the things we ask for.

  • @cyntstancil4561
    @cyntstancil4561 2 роки тому +1

    the "don't come for me, I ain't no fuckin psychic" got me 💀. I thought she trolling too.

  • @robin-gs3fz
    @robin-gs3fz 2 роки тому +2

    I’m a guy who still hasn’t had a relationship and I can tell you it fucks with me a lot. Everything in this video is me but I’m not delusional trying to make myself feel better so I don’t say all that bullshit. I’m a loser who hasn’t had a relationship. It is what it is.

  • @fabian6514.cr3
    @fabian6514.cr3 2 роки тому +2

    Dee being so shady 😭😭😭😭

  • @derrick1288
    @derrick1288 2 роки тому +4

    Ooh wow this is such an interesting topic that I have never thought about. I'm a gay 23 year old male, I have never kissed, dated, hugged, another man and im still a Virgin. I get sad sometimes because I feel lonely but I never thought how it actually it affected me. No I truly understand why I'm scared to have guys as friends, and how if a guy were to flirt with me I'd think it was a prank. I wonder how to change this.

  • @FeelinErie
    @FeelinErie 2 роки тому +2

    9:30 - I'm going to hell for this, I was laughing hard with you, and I feel bad about that 😂, but bless her heart, I do feel bad for her ☹️

  • @c.v194
    @c.v194 2 роки тому +17

    Dee really set the girls straight at the end of the video.😭

  • @ShamShammie
    @ShamShammie 2 роки тому +5

    Honestly I’m similar. I mean I had guys who liked me back in school, but I don’t think it caused me to have low self esteem tho. I mean I’ve never been confident about anything of me. Anytime a guy in school and still to this day does show attention to me I never believed them, and I never let it get far.. and I do kinda of panic a bit.
    I’m 21 now, still a virgin, never dated…like at all. idk I’m just always scared to allow myself to date plus. Like I talk to guys but when I see they seem introvert in me I panic and go ghost😆 I honestly unlike most girls in this world don’t really care to get a boyfriend either, relationships don’t do anything for me. I think it’s also my introvert side it’s like I can’t be around someone all damn day 😂 but I do hope soon I can allow myself to date someone.

  • @latinoprophet
    @latinoprophet 2 роки тому

    Honestly there’s pros and cons. Pros is obviously not needing someone around just to have someone around. The independence growth is large. I didn’t date in highschool but I have been in college. I feel like just everyone’s change faster in school so dating is weird lol. The feeing of independence is large. The cons definitely are that it’s a bit uncomfortable in the beginning because I wasn’t exposed to the dating scene in highschool. Made it a bit harder to get started but after you do it’s fine.
    The part that is REALLY hard tho that I haven’t seen people talking about is not wanting to be consistent lmao. The complete opposite of getting attached. Like I have dated a few people but they just slowly ended because it work! Lol going from being independent for much of your life then having to dedicate much more time to one person is a lot. Sometimes I feel bad haha cause it’s like sometimes I DONT wanna go out every weekend 😭 sometimes I don’t wanna see you or talk to u everyday LMAO
    Now about parties? Can’t relate lmao if there’s a party imma party 😂😭

  • @katherineknight5899
    @katherineknight5899 2 роки тому

    Chillleee People nowadays want to be therapist so bad 😂 they have a answer for everyyy thing

  • @disappointment2657
    @disappointment2657 2 роки тому +4

    But As I know companionship doesn't mean life partner only. You can choose to be alone but not lonely. I just hate romantic relationship, I feel its alot of work that I don't want to get myself into something I don't want to.

  • @siyakolisistanaccount5378
    @siyakolisistanaccount5378 2 роки тому +2

    I'm 22 and never had a boyfriend before. I wasn't allowed to date in high school but I never cared back then. In varsity I was allowed to date and I thought since there's thousands of people I would be able to find a nice guy to date. Chile I was wrong. I'm done with my studies and I still haven't been on a date to this day.
    Worse I'm scared of telling a guy my situation not because of rejection but I'm scared he will date me out of pity.

  • @IKhanmakeWAR2
    @IKhanmakeWAR2 2 роки тому

    I feel like there's a looot of coping in these responses. Maybe a select few people are truly comfortable never having that connection, but I think it's truly rare.

  • @nico_t_ne6708
    @nico_t_ne6708 2 роки тому +5

    As a 16 y/o gay boy I know for a fact I will not have any relationships until I get into college 😭

  • @akull7534
    @akull7534 2 роки тому +1

    Im 17 and I've never been in any romantic relationship. But I have had a good amount of people have interest in me but I I'm scared to be in a relationship. Like I definitely want to but I don't trust people, and once again very self conscious because I feel like alot of relationships now a days revolve around sex/looks and experience. And I'm just not ready to do all that yet. I want a boyfriend but I dont wanna have sex and shit until I'm ready but alot of men don't wanna wait for you and just straight up wanna fuck and I just don't have the energy to waste on that , don't need the stress

  • @guccioguss
    @guccioguss 2 роки тому +3

    2:50 Dee thought the same thing I did😂😂😂

  • @rubybrown1676
    @rubybrown1676 2 роки тому +1

    I can see it messing with your confidence a bit and you'll have a lack of experience, but it's not as serious as some make it. People put way too much emphasis on school days. You really aren't missing out on much and your life isn't over after school, you still have a chance to make good memories after. People need to stop looking back so they can enjoy whats in front of them

  • @sin5027
    @sin5027 2 роки тому

    these 1 video uploads gotta go dee

  • @putaromason5234
    @putaromason5234 2 роки тому +6

    I get what you're saying about men being visual creatures but its just not really accurate to me in my opinion. Because that visual nonsense can go flying out the window if they have motives which most of the time is the case.
    Also saying that you never be in a romantic relationship shouldn't be shunned or seen as them trying to defend themselves as of why they aren't in a relationship. Just because you won't be in a romantic relationship doesn't mean you won't have any other relationships. Such as friends, close friends, best friends, family, and etc.It's a good thing to note that and being self aware of your surroundings and yourself. Knowing that being in a relationship can be really stressful to you and your mental health is a big step of growing up and becoming more mature.Everything is not for everything. Everybody is not for everybody. Everything happens at the wrong and right times.

  • @imaniluvsu1
    @imaniluvsu1 2 роки тому +3

    Even the most busted looking people can get into relationships because those relationships, at least some of them are based on common interests and all of that. Some.
    I mean obviously there are people who CHOOSE someone that other's may find unattractive with the intent to use that person for something.
    Beauty is in the eye of the beholder so those standards will be different for everyone.

  • @blink8235
    @blink8235 3 місяці тому

    Dee should probably have something to write on to remind herself of what she wants to say at the end
    or she could note the times

  • @eppskevin
    @eppskevin 2 роки тому

    I get what the young sista is saying. She’s saying when growing up in the suburbs she just didn’t see “herself” as much as you like, which is super depressing

  • @AP.lovetoAll
    @AP.lovetoAll 2 роки тому +2

    😀 The last thoughts of the videoooo tho !!!!! YOU SAID IT SO I DON'T HAVE TO! BEEN saying that too many women try to fool themselves into thinking it's because the guy is intimidated or don't like strong women 😏 enough with the delusional mob thinking! Bless

  • @Al7249
    @Al7249 2 роки тому +6

    Formative years, lol thought it was supposed to be about HS. Though like yeah I can understand the low self-esteem and self worth effect. That shy, glasses wearing woman, yeah lol I wasn't sure if she was trolling either like it seemed like it was heartfelt but she sounded so much like a cartoonishy shy character. I'm not super sure.

  • @yaadmanuzt8929
    @yaadmanuzt8929 2 роки тому

    Lol the black girl with the forehead I didnt even hear wht she was saying....I was tunnel visioned on tht dome🤣🤣🤣

  • @blueghost6778
    @blueghost6778 2 роки тому +13

    I personally think that not everyone needs a sexual attraction to a person to be happy asexual exist more so of an emotional connection humans desire really just feeling included or needed it doesn't necessarily have to be a person that you see sexually
    Edit
    Social cues really play a factor you may not even notice someone that likes you because you don't like them

  • @Markaylaa0
    @Markaylaa0 2 роки тому +1

    24 & never been in a relationship & chileee im confused as hell now

  • @rlouis215
    @rlouis215 2 роки тому +1

    Mind you a key point they said was no one they were attracted to asked them but what about the guys some of them friend zone bet weren’t counting those guys in this tik tok

  • @BigElly12
    @BigElly12 2 роки тому

    The ones who didn’t get much attention in school…you didn’t miss a damn thing but a sneaky rubber bullet that would’ve left a temporary bruise.

  • @brook117
    @brook117 2 роки тому +1

    Dee: *yall just ugly LMAO*

  • @kevincaldwell2025
    @kevincaldwell2025 2 роки тому

    Everybody has problems, and I know damn well it's not my problem to fix that 💯

  • @rachel183321
    @rachel183321 7 місяців тому

    I’m alone there’s nothing out there this is the end for me some of us are ment to die alone

  • @jackyogurl5735
    @jackyogurl5735 2 роки тому

    "Chapstick will find you"

  • @BigElly12
    @BigElly12 2 роки тому

    10:24 she said lemme block these sensitive ones out rq before they launch 🚀 at my neck

  • @dlbarnes
    @dlbarnes 2 роки тому +28

    You need to consider some women have nasty attitudes. I understand popularity, sexual appeal, and dress can play a role in relationships but don’t forget attitude. I’m pretty sure some of the ladies had a bad vibe no one wanted to deal with.
    Now watch a video from the male perspective on dating see what males are saying.

    • @oscxrv8621
      @oscxrv8621 2 роки тому +1

      mhm

    • @dlbarnes
      @dlbarnes 2 роки тому +5

      @@IBBMS not all men now the men you deal with or your friends is a small sample size. But some men prefer respectful and decent woman not catty. Yes there are some men gravitate to women with bad attitudes. This will not be a male or female bashing session I’ll leave that to the immature.

    • @emilyash2584
      @emilyash2584 2 роки тому +31

      Nah, thee are a lot of sweet and quiet people who are overlooked. And there are a lot of “nasty” people who are in relationships.

    • @dlbarnes
      @dlbarnes 2 роки тому +3

      @@emilyash2584 But the point is certain factors contribute to this, and I’m saying maybe some of the people in the video had attitudes, which could be why they were single. This is speculation on my part.

    • @dylancn
      @dylancn 2 роки тому

      Facts 💯🗣

  • @bigbando9437
    @bigbando9437 2 роки тому +1

    9:40 DEE YOU KNOW YOU WRONG

  • @Misshowzat
    @Misshowzat 2 роки тому +1

    Haha, I think that first girl A. Doesn't know anyone like this B. Has more going on to deal with then just dating.

  • @lisah3460
    @lisah3460 2 роки тому

    I just did not want to date in high school. How was I going to date? I don't want to date with a curfew or until the street lights come on.

  • @SlyXD-mb1so
    @SlyXD-mb1so 2 роки тому +2

    Idc what nobody says, I knew I was raised right when not being allowed to date in highschool

  • @LayRoyalty
    @LayRoyalty 2 роки тому +1

    I just wish I had dated in middle/high school never had a boyfriend because I am a gay male and I was ashamed of who I was and there wasn't a lot of out gay guys either.

  • @theRevWontBeOnTv
    @theRevWontBeOnTv 2 роки тому

    Shorty around 3:18 is capping or her town was under a rock

  • @LonerFez69
    @LonerFez69 2 роки тому +1

    I didn't have a gf until I was 27 and I'm happier than all my friends whose been banging since high school. Life is just boring to them haha. All people don't need validation from others

  • @123newjersey3
    @123newjersey3 2 роки тому +2

    ive always been attractive, so i've never had to deal with ppl not being into me lmao, but i dont crave a relationship. sounds like so much goddamn work, for something i dont even want. maybe sex, but having to deal with a whole other persons problems when i'm still working on my own sounds fucking lame.

    • @kamaripeart1768
      @kamaripeart1768 2 роки тому

      That is true, but is there ever a point in anyone's life when you don't have problems.

    • @123newjersey3
      @123newjersey3 2 роки тому

      @@kamaripeart1768 I understand what you're trying to say, but I have way too much going on in my life rn

  • @trevorchola2189
    @trevorchola2189 2 роки тому +12

    I don't agree with you Dee, people cannot aspire for a relationship, but can reap the benefits of being in a relationship (sex, attention and the like). The interpretation is individualised I believe 🌝.

  • @GossipGyal1
    @GossipGyal1 2 роки тому

    This is a good ass topic.

  • @IntelligentInsights876
    @IntelligentInsights876 2 роки тому +3

    I've never had a girlfriend, but I've slept around though😞

  • @jimjimjimmy7793
    @jimjimjimmy7793 2 роки тому

    Y’all did miss shit I was distracted from my school work and had to deal with someone else’s problems 😭😭😭 and my own problems.

  • @ballystarr89
    @ballystarr89 2 роки тому

    9:36 had me dead

  • @aduhaduh4426
    @aduhaduh4426 2 роки тому +4

    Your teens and 20s are for you to discover yourself
    why tf y'all trying to settle down so young

  • @terrelljackson.
    @terrelljackson. 2 роки тому +6

    Well in the gay community this is the norm

    • @joshua2764
      @joshua2764 2 роки тому +1

      Chile u ain't lie...

    • @terrelljackson.
      @terrelljackson. 2 роки тому +1

      @@crowing3886 no…..not most of their lives. Most gay people aren’t accepted as children. So dating in adolescence is not the norm for us. Most of us don’t even come out until we’re grown…….

  • @baabz5717
    @baabz5717 2 роки тому +1

    lol if this isn’t me. I realized it came from a place of insecurity for me. I’ve improved though!!!

  • @dylancn
    @dylancn 2 роки тому +3

    Shit I'm 22 & still never dated 🤷‍♂️

  • @creeikuko
    @creeikuko 2 роки тому

    😂😂😂 I didn’t go to senior prom because I didn’t give af and I was a cheer leader too ! 🤣🤣 I didn’t even go to any graduation parties when I graduated I dipped across the ocean 3 days later to La from Hawaii I was so done with school Lmfaoo get over it …you have to ask yourself if YOU even desire yourself first . High school is such a small fragment of the entire world and your life to be hung up on all the details about it but I guess use your 20s to un learn all that and get over it

    • @TheMissyg432
      @TheMissyg432 2 роки тому +2

      I think you missed the point of the video as someone who can relate these women aren't hung up on not having the dream high school experience. Their just stating that since they never dated in their teen years and now current adult years it has affected them in how they interact with other people in a potentially romantic situation. But also get your argument also.