Something we tell ourselves is that we probably don't need to know who's fronting, so we try not to dwell on it too much if we don't know and we try to just "go with the flow". Sometimes it is very helpful to notice which part is out, but if it stresses you out more than it helps, then I recommend trying to not obsess about getting it right and just focus on the current moment (we know we can get a little obsessive about things sometimes and it just makes the dissociation worse). Idk that at least works for us, but every system is different! Just throwing it out there in case someone reads it and finds it helpful in some way
@xx-sof-xx thank you for all your thoughtful encouraging words... I think it's a good attitude not to put pressure on yourself to know who is fronting... and go with the flow...I think there's an added issue for me in that I have been in such denial about having a dissociative disorder that when I'm not sure who I am in myself, it just feeds into the unrealness of the therapy, the disorder... everything... but I am also trying to not put pressure on myself... and my T today was going on about just allowing myself to be however I turn up... thank you for your wisdom and experience!
Sadly we struggle a LOT with this "I don't know who I am" in the front ... the last time someone had an IDEA, who she could have been, was in august ... beginning of august ... so four and a half months since then ... and there are times, where we dissociate heavily because of this - but most of the times we are just like "it is like it is now ... next topic?" ... so not the best thing but ... this summer we got the idea, that we split even more, when we try to discover more about ourselves and the system and all ... (and sorry for maybe bad English - we are from Germany and while some of us are able to understand English well, we struggle with grammar and sometimes spelling, when we try to speak or write in English. And most of the time we don't want to use the Google Translator ^^ ) Edit: we are an official diagnosed system for over a decade now ... so yeah ... even though we tend to now "who is fronting" at some points in this journey ... we struggle a lot more since summer 2022 - mainly because we have been forced to tell our names by a clinical therapist (I don't know how to name the persons job in English ...) against our own "we don't like to say our names to other people outside because we fear to give them the power over our system" ...
Your English is very good! We could understand the whole comment. Thank you for sharing! Something we forgot to mention in our video, is how sometimes when asked who is fronting, we lose our ability to tell, and it makes us dissociate a lot (not always, but something we're still very familiar with).
I have OSDD. I find in therapy even though it's usually the main host who turns up to do the work and communicate on behalf of the others, quite often I'm not convinced it is actually fully them because my thinking can go very very confusing. I start not tu understand what my therapist is really saying and I feel like I'm making shit up. I think I may be experiencing blending more than I realise and I don't know what to do about it. It means I'm very disconnected from the flow of what's going on. And I feel like I don't belong. Thanks for your video
I'd say this is very common in therapy when you're dissociative. We relate and it made it super hard to do therapy (our therapist was not good at working with dissociation). Sending the best vibes your way!
Thank you so much, that was so helpful ❤
Something we tell ourselves is that we probably don't need to know who's fronting, so we try not to dwell on it too much if we don't know and we try to just "go with the flow". Sometimes it is very helpful to notice which part is out, but if it stresses you out more than it helps, then I recommend trying to not obsess about getting it right and just focus on the current moment (we know we can get a little obsessive about things sometimes and it just makes the dissociation worse). Idk that at least works for us, but every system is different! Just throwing it out there in case someone reads it and finds it helpful in some way
@xx-sof-xx thank you for all your thoughtful encouraging words... I think it's a good attitude not to put pressure on yourself to know who is fronting... and go with the flow...I think there's an added issue for me in that I have been in such denial about having a dissociative disorder that when I'm not sure who I am in myself, it just feeds into the unrealness of the therapy, the disorder... everything... but I am also trying to not put pressure on myself... and my T today was going on about just allowing myself to be however I turn up... thank you for your wisdom and experience!
Sadly we struggle a LOT with this "I don't know who I am" in the front ... the last time someone had an IDEA, who she could have been, was in august ... beginning of august ... so four and a half months since then ... and there are times, where we dissociate heavily because of this - but most of the times we are just like "it is like it is now ... next topic?" ... so not the best thing but ... this summer we got the idea, that we split even more, when we try to discover more about ourselves and the system and all ...
(and sorry for maybe bad English - we are from Germany and while some of us are able to understand English well, we struggle with grammar and sometimes spelling, when we try to speak or write in English. And most of the time we don't want to use the Google Translator ^^ )
Edit: we are an official diagnosed system for over a decade now ... so yeah ... even though we tend to now "who is fronting" at some points in this journey ... we struggle a lot more since summer 2022 - mainly because we have been forced to tell our names by a clinical therapist (I don't know how to name the persons job in English ...) against our own "we don't like to say our names to other people outside because we fear to give them the power over our system" ...
Your English is very good! We could understand the whole comment.
Thank you for sharing!
Something we forgot to mention in our video, is how sometimes when asked who is fronting, we lose our ability to tell, and it makes us dissociate a lot (not always, but something we're still very familiar with).
I have OSDD. I find in therapy even though it's usually the main host who turns up to do the work and communicate on behalf of the others, quite often I'm not convinced it is actually fully them because my thinking can go very very confusing. I start not tu understand what my therapist is really saying and I feel like I'm making shit up. I think I may be experiencing blending more than I realise and I don't know what to do about it. It means I'm very disconnected from the flow of what's going on. And I feel like I don't belong.
Thanks for your video
I'd say this is very common in therapy when you're dissociative. We relate and it made it super hard to do therapy (our therapist was not good at working with dissociation). Sending the best vibes your way!