Very touching story with how Ben opened his heart for Sophie. He said she deserved a happy life when his wife mentioned having a procedure, and then he was big-hearted enough to make sure she was loved like she deserved. He wouldn't give his ex another chance, but he gave an innocent girl a chance. He's a good, strong man and an amazing father.
Wow what a story!😢 I was nearly in tears! Such a sad story this Ben is a wonderful person, a truly wonderful man!❤ He still showed luv ❤️ & care for Claire after what she did to him!
Yep, and highly likely it was an ongoing affair. When the other guys ex-wife discovered the affair he ended it with the wife of the OP. So she was left without the AP but with his baby and knowing that his ex-wife hates her and blames her for that divorce. She must have been guessing that the AP's ex-wife will likely contact her husband, the OP, to inform him of the affair. The legal letter effectively did the same thing. The OP never suspected anything so he wouldn't have known if she had lots of other affairs prior to this. Any woman who is willing to cheat once is willing to cheat all the time.
Yep. Named in her AP'S divorce meant it was ongoing and the AP'S ex-wifes discovered it. She lied to her husband about the extent of the affair. I would think it's almost certain she knew it was the AP'S baby as soon as she realised she was pregnant. She probably considered it a thrill until AP'S wife exposed the truth.
Ben is an earth angel. He’s one in a billion, and Clair really effed up. She’ll never find another guy like him, and the fact that Clair didn’t know that, or worse, DID know that, and STILL betrayed him the way she did, just tells me she’s a heartless, evil, SELFISH woman.
Ben is a sucker, Clair knows she has a weak man and she's taking full advantage of it. Women only treat men the way men teach them to. Ben taught Clair to treat him like a doormat so she did. Had he have spine n high standards for himself he'd never let no woman do him like that.
@@TheBerkeleyBeauty you're not a man, you'll NEVER understand what it feels like to find out an offspring you believe is biologically yours turns out to be made by some other man and your resources have been used to raise their seed. We are programmed to pass on n care about OUR genes not other men's DNA. Understand this, men don't care about "innocent kid" we care about our GENETICALLY innocent kid. It's selfish n cold but that's survival, my resources are for MY genetic legacy, not another man's legacy.
@@kenolson3064 Timeline says it’s happened more than once. She was barely pregnant when the AP wife’s lawyer sent the letter, it takes time to get the evidence and file the paperwork. There are also some pretty stringent rules about what kind of evidence is required for Alienation of Affection. A one time, out of town affair couldn’t provide the evidence needed. Had OP contacted the AP wife, he would have known everything. But you can tell by the story that he didn’t want to know.
The biggest lie told in this story is that Claire had a one-time romp with her AP. It's much more than likely she had an ongoing affair which eventually led to her pregnancy. Most women require multiple times over a period of months for pregnancy to occur. Also, unless this story is more than 2 decades old, there is the morning after pill sold over-the-counter she could have taken to prevent the pregnancy. I think, deep down inside, she viewed her husband's "nice guy" ways as the weakness of a simpish man and lost some respect for him as he was too nice and accommodating to her. I'm glad he did not reconcile with her as the relationship would have never been what it once was.
Did you know that when women are ovulating their sexual appetite and signs of arousal are heightened? It's as if her body senses it is ready to be pregnant and directs the brain in that regard. My ex wife and I always used protection except exactly once. She got pregnant, (and later aborted)
Yeah, it only takes one time. No, not in all cases. Reading this comment before listening to the story but I have no doubt OP'S wife probably had a ongoing relationship with her affair partner/ partners.
This story is very touching, and I find the narrator admirable. Also, hearing that the man's state has a presumption of paternity for married men made me rethink the issue of mandatory paternity testing. Since cheating by women has become so prevalent, I think that if a state can require men to take legal action to remove the presumption of paternity, then it could instead require women to prove paternity before putting a man's name on the birth certificate.
This is always been that way, why do you think laws has been like this. The government don’t want to pay for a child, so they don’t want mandatory paternity test.
The court system has made child support a business. They get a cut of the child support money. Do you think they will just give that up. I hear what you are saying and agree with you 💯. But we live in a very corrupt world
This will never happen (in the US) because...money. Title IV incentivizes states to monetize their family court operations. Daddy Gubmint then gives them money to cover their costs. For example, if a state says their family court system cost them $1 billion in public and family assistance payouts, the feds give them $1 billion (or slightly more). BUT if that state mitigated its costs by taking in $850 million from child support and alimony, that state just made $850 million in "profit" that can be used for other slush funds and specious projects. Mandatory paternity tests would increase the cost to the state (who's paying for the tests?) without an offsetting income stream (unless the federal government accepts the cost of the tests by obfuscating the cost by making it a part of Medicaid). I've spoken to lawmakers in several states (NY, PA, VA, MD, DE,NJ) about this. It's a political non-starter.
@@hdcvo2570 there's always the change that would solve all of the paternity issues, stop giving government assistance to the 304s popping out kid after kid.
No way she has several drinks with a work colleague and then invited him into her hotel room with out having the intention of having s-time. She thought so little of her husband she even went bareback with her coworker endangering her husband’s life with the possibility of a STD.
Except he didn't appear to realise that his ex-wife was obviously cheating longterm. He appears to go along with her story that she got pregnant from her one and only time cheating. It was an ongoing affair, that's why she was named in her AP'S divorce case
I cannot honestly believe that men like this exist. A great example of a stellar human being. Truly kings amongst men. God bless him. He deserves all the happiness.
They do exist, you just don’t hear about it because females don’t give or talk about heir men being this good. We are mostly looked as a walking wallets.
@@rogerruhland8897 he did not st first. But that little girl was so much in love with this man not knowing that he was not her father. he accepted the child because she had nothing to do with her 304 mother's screw ups.
This is one of the most heart wrenching stories I’ve heard , Ben is one hell of a man . Claire screwed up big time and she knows it. Normally I have 0 sympathy for cheaters but I think she has truly repented
I’m happiest for this father and the kids. People are going too soft on his ex - she’s responsible for breaking up two marriages, hiding her betrayal from the husband, tried to strap her husband with a child that wasn’t his, destroyed the family of the little girl that moved to Seattle, and was willing to punish the innocent child she’d created by causing her to bear the brunt of her adulterous act. And had her husband wanted her to abort..she’d likely have done so.
doesn't matter, cheating isn't shiz isn't end all be all she loved this man realizedher mistake, and wasn't with anyone for 17 years and lets be clear if your wife is a cheater if she is that willing you work it out move on she was truly sorry if she isn't willing to work it out or she isn't remorseful etc but ben fucked up, he shoulda reconciled and been with her he clearly loves her and she clearly loves him and lets be clear many woman leave their man do horrible thiings etc she didnt she was truly sorry and proved she did love him and honestly if your wife really does love you which any man can see from this story you stay and work it out 17 years of no one else there's a reason marriage fails in this day and age you all don't know how to do a marriage properly there are obvious times of cheating where you just leave but if she wants to work it out etc serious and tries you are just as bad if not worse then the cheater you put your pathetic pride over your family at the very least you try to work it out and the man lied to himself, he clearly got over her being a hoe because he was there for her the entire time, you dont' do that it was his sense of "oh she cheated i can't look at her the same" but if that's true why be nice console her etc he was too much focused on oh she cheated on me rather then lets make this work he never raged at her, so seriously at the very least try imagine 17 years he has a loving devoted wife you don't cry over one act and end it you build good memories over the bad and move on that's what a real man does if he still loves his wife and she's truly remorseful most cases you probably just leave if they aren't but when she clearly is and you don't even try you threw away the love of your life for 0 reason she is YOUR wife, she fukt up, MOVE ON marriage is for good and bad and honestly if you aren't outraged enough to divorce and cut her out of your life completely then you deserve it for yourself to try again why would you wanna halt your happiness you're just as bad as the cheater if you ruin the rest of your life refusing to get past one moment again if she was mean or not turning from her sin i'd be all for it but no she did deserve a second chance he starved himself of love for 10 years for 0 reason treat marriage as sacred or it won't be sacred
@andrewtatian7495 you have wondered off the farm and lost reality. If she cheats, she's for the streets. When you put together all the actions this woman did which the OP here laid out.... she is an evil, vile, pathetic, manipulative, horrible human being. If a spouse thinks they can get away with something then they most likely will try to. Make sure it is clear up front..... You cheat, it's done. Period. There is never and will ever be a good enough reason or circumstance to justify it. Show her the front door
@@andrewtatian7495 "if she wants to work it out serious and tries you are just as bad if not worse then the cheater" wtf are you on about? yes ppl can reconcile but in no way shape or form would you be just as bad or worse than the cheater lmao talk about victim blaming smh. crazy thing about this If it was the MAN who cheated and had a baby outside the marriage most ppl wouldn't have this much sympathy.
I'm gonna give you, the presenter, some props here. There are some similar channels here that would probably rip the guy a new one for "simping" for the little girl and being kind to his ex. I'm with you on validating this guy's integrity.
I'm 46 and been through the same thing as this man and I cried at the end He's a better man than me because when my young wife 22 years ago became pregnant with her lovers child , I was so broken I couldn't stand to even look at her. Just knowing that the affair baby was a constant reminder of her destroying my life and set my world on fire, I had no strength or peace to function properly. I always wondered what would of happened if I would have handled it like this guy in the story. he's a better man than I could ever be
*sigh... you did the best you could man. We are all created differently with vastly different levels of empathy, compassion and pain tolerance. If this story is even real, the OP has absolutely elite levels of empathy, etc... More than any man I personally know. I strongly suspect you did the best you could at the time.
He is not a better man than you, you did the right thing. Only beta males and simps stay and raise another man’s baby after the mother cheated on him. This is a good story but OP is still beta
Ben is a wonderful loving man but he is a man with moral standards. Claire really blew up her life with her affair. I have grave doubts that they only did it only once. It is indeed a blessing that a wonderful daughter was the product of the affair. Sophi is a beautiful loving girl who instinctively realised that Ben is a loving, caring and thoughtful man. His adoption of her was a marvellous action. I also think that Ben's new wife quickly realised that he was a man with great morals and is a wonderful caring parent. The way Ben writes about his wife he is a confirmed monogamist and deeply loved her. Claire destroyed her marriage with the affair. Selfish actions can have devestating results.
The OP (Ben) is a true king 🤴. Some may call him a doormat, but I don't think so. Why? For one thing, from the moment he found out about his ex-wife's affair and pregnancy, he ALWAYS covered his LEGAL bases. Very smart on his part. Secondly, he comes out smelling like a rose 🌹. In the end, he wins. Kudos to him (and good on him for NOT taking his ex-wife back).
I agree, just cause someone acted the way he did doesn't make him a door mat. He had no reason to bring out his firmness till it was needed. Being a door mat would be caving in to the ex wife and not divorcing her.
He's a father through and through. He understood that compromising himself would have been unhealthy for himself and then affect the children. He accepted his unknowns and acted accordingly. He didn't know how he would act towards the mother, or how he would feel about Sophi. I'm so glad things worked out for them.
Na, he’s a sucker, and his wife knew he was a sucker so did him dirty 😂 Gentlemen - women will treat you the way you let them treat you! If you are a sucker, they will pick it up and treat you like a sucker like this guy. Don’t be a chump.
Would start vomiting if my wife was pregnant by another man. Disgusting. I certainly don't believe her story that it was a one-off. It was an ongoing affair, that's why she was named in the other guys divorce. Also we must assume she planned for that guy to make her pregnant. A cheating spouse would be VERY careful not to get pregnant unless she had already decided she is happy to have a baby with him. Knowing her husband also wanted another baby made it easy to pass a baby off as his until the affair was exposed.
Was thinking she actually got fired and didn't quit. He should have called her office and confirmed her quitting. Bet the AP's ex-wife contacted the office an got them both fired
@@benjin3993 Yes, you are probably correct. She 'suddenly' quit her job when AP'S wife names her in a divorce. Sounds like she was fired. Also I would assume she knew from the start the baby was AP'S, probably hoping for a different outcome with AP until reality set in.
definitely an excellent father for the children. He showed gentleness with his ww and the unborn child. He had his priorities straight and took responsibility where he saw it.
Here's another woman claiming that it was just " a mistake ". Let me remind you gentlemen, and any ladies who happen to be listening, this is never just " a mistake. " This is a series of decisions! Tens, hundreds, and in some cases thousands of decisions, all made to have an affair. This isn't just a random error, this is someone who doesn't deserve the good spouse that they have.
Yes! It is a series of calculated betrayals. She doesn't deserve a good husband. She threw away everything real (him, the children, the family) to play out her fantasies as a wh*re. Now, her wh*redom is her reality and having a good husband is her fantasy. I hope those children grow up to not be like her.
@@brandonmatthews3722 it's crazy cuz if she had sex fantasies she could have act them all out with the husband. Any sane husband would be happy with a wife who wants to experiment sexually between the two of them.
@@ethosterros9430 IKR! You would think that she would really awaken the "savage beast" in her husband. And keep the safety, security, provision, etc. that he would work to uphold. I guess it wasn't forbidden enough. Go figure!
Real man?!! Excuse me?!! OP did a good thing. Who do you think you are making fun of OP like that. Real men are suckers as women raise them to be. He's a decent human being. That's it. I get sick of this real man BS. At best OP is a good guy. At worse, he's a sucker. I wouldn't do it though. The mother was trying to un@\°v€ her daughter. Shed only end up suffering over it. And I would watch. Heck I would drain the rest of my savings just to see both my w#@®€ egg donor and my traitor of my mother writhe in agony until I starved to d€@√H, voiding my bowelz right on that chair. OP is a foolish but noble man.
This story is very sad, but actions have consequences. The ex made a series of decisions that gradually broke down walls until eventually she committed adultery. She did all she could to repent, but op, understanding his limitations, protected all involved as best as he could. The divorce was a necessary step, which preped him emotionally to adopt the innocent child. He being in the child's life probably afforded her a measure of normalcy in her life. This story is so tragic but reflects the realities of life. We need to be ever vigilant to attacks on our happiness. I wish all involved peace and joy in their futures.
this is one of the most saddest story. Claire's actions of infidelity has impacted so many lives. Her 3 kids, Ex Husband, AP, AP's wife, and AP's children. The sad part is she is NEVER getting her husband back. Actions have consequences and this one was huge.
He got an extra daughter and kept the cheater at arm's way. Win-win. The important part is that he made the choice to care for and love this child. He wasn't bullied, coerced or told to "Man up".
One of the best I've read in a long, long time. This kind hearted man made the best of an awful situation and saved the life of a little girl who he owed nothing to. It speaks volumes to the kind of man he is and his ex-wife, who ruined her life, thankfully didn't ruin the life of the little girl thanks entirely to Ben.
Truly heartbreaking. I would’ve done everything he did except adopt her, I wouldn’t want to be legally tied up. It’s fortunate the wife was passive and remorseful, she could’ve been a real devil and made everything difficult.
In many cases, divorces can often be unnesecessarily vindictive and very often it is the children who suffer the brunt of the blow. In many cases, the divorce could happen completely amicable and the two partners can seperate without any drama or fights. The children would have connection to both parents and while they may be sad for a while as they grow up they would understand the reason for it. In many cases, this would also extend family networks for the children if their parents remarried with other families. A sad situation was turned into a neutral situation by this guy, and it is an example really for many people.
Then you've never been under the spell of small children. I have kids and no material wealth could replace them. Legal cost can be costly but mental imprisonment because you could have done the right thing can be a life sentence
Ben sounds like a another form of Jesus. He did something that most men won’t be able to do. He thought about his family more than anything, that’s what a real man do.
Like the cheating wives, I see a lot of the cuckolded husbands are also just thinking about me me me me me and me. Understandable but whatever to forgiveness and vow of for better or worse?
When I first read the title I was like tf is wrong with dude, but after hearing it, I honestly couldn’t do it, but I understand completely, lil girl sounded really sweet
@@Witnessmoo Sorry but Sophie won his heart. I think part of the reason he was able to be the father of Sophie is because his ex wife gave him an amicable divorce.
That’s a great story for real. That dude stepped up and became that girls father even though he didn’t need to and the situation that happened. That’s the real dude right there
It sucks about affair kids, it is not their fault how they were conceived. It is the ex-wife's fault and AP, and the AP is more of piece of crap. With the exception of calming his ex with hugs, the Op handle everything else level headed. Wish we could hear more about his relationship with Sophie.
As a former step father.... there is nothing more precious then a child you choose or you birth, just different Class is the word I'd use to describe this man
Our hero here is stoic. He did right by Sofie and his other two kids. He also let his ex have the consequences of her actions. By her account she willingly made possible the encounter she admits to and ruined the trust in their marriage.
Great story! I think many of us can relate to both Ben and Claire. It’s also a great example of the long term consequences, to all involved, for even one episode of cheating.
One episode??? Do you really believe that. She was named in the other divorce. The other ex-wife would only have found out her name if it was an ongoing affair. And she was happy to let the AP make her pregnant.
@@columkenn good point. So, she quit but keep the contacting AP. Another....stupid thing. Based on the story, AP initiate the cheating. So, why on earth didnt OP sue AP as well.
@@eleethtahgra7182 Actually No. The story shows she initiated the cheating by inviting the AP to her hotel room. We don't know how long they were cheating previously but that's why she was named in the other divorce. She planned the cheating, but it must have been ongoing and his wife found out. It's more likely the AP ended the affair rather than her because his wife discovered it and knew who she was. She only listed that one time she got pregnant in this account. She also didn't use protection means she really was planning the AP make her pregnant and she could easy pass it off as her husbands. A cheater will be VERY careful not to get pregnant unless she has decided in advance that she is happy for pregnancy to occur. It's possible through the passion of their affair that she fantasised AP would leave his wife when pregnant and start new marriage with him, but the AP closed that avenue afterwards, so she had to pass it off as her husbands. Also she wasn't surprised by the letter from the AP'S ex-wifes lawer, so the AP had probably informed her his wife caught them and legal action was coming. Added to her pregnancy she had time in advance to invent the story of it just being one night only. Her falling to her knees the moment he showed her the letter suggests she knew this was coming and was dreading it. I would be certain she knew from the start that the baby was AP'S and not her husbands. Whatever her thoughts she definitely planned pregnancy with the AP
You can call this guy a simp, but in reality he is doing what he can to protect an innocent life. He's a stand up guy. Excessive stress during pregnancy can lead to birth defects, or other serious long term problems.
No he's a simp. We need to stop sugar coating all the bs, that's why things have gotten so bad now because men keep giving other men a pass for the bs.
@@TheChocolateChamp Its been a month and I watch a lot of these types of videos. But if memory serves, he did dump her. To my mind a SIMP would stay with her and be a family. What he did was adopt his kid's half sister so she could have as good a life as his kids. She is an innocent victim in all this. He is not forgiving the cheating wife. And let's hope she doesn't go get knocked up again.
This guy was far from a simp! He never touched her again sexually and remarried. How is he a simp. I only see a powerful strong human man that has better moral values than 99% of the earth.
Look we need to stop calling all men who do this a simp. True , most men couldn’t do it. I definitely couldn’t… but, I wouldn’t take out my frustration on a innocent child. If anything, I’m glad there is men out there like him. Before I’m criticized… I was raised by a man , who isn’t my biological dad. Yet, I know for I fact I couldn’t do it. Raise someone else’s child. So it does take a special type of person to raise someone else’s child. So please stop calling these men simps.
What bothers me about many of these stories is how the guilty wife begs and pleads her soon-to-be-ex husband to stay, and how she'll do *anything* to keep him to make up for her mistake. My experience was the complete opposite, as my ex continued to treat me poorly and was unwilling to make amends at all once the affair was out in the open. That treatment and attitude toward me made me feel like that much less of a man, that I should be cheated on and discarded. It's been so hard to get over the deception and rejection of the last several years, but praise God that I met and married a wonderful woman who has blessed me immensely. I still have to work hard at being a more confident, decisive and assertive man, but I realize that I cannot give into past feelings of inferiority. Stay strong to the faithful men out there!!
I applaud you for allowing an innocent child Sophie into your kind ❤️, thankyou for being a awesome Father to Sophie, FatherGod Himself Bless you and all your children as they are all precious and the most valuable gifts you will ever hold in your hands Welldone.
I think the reasons for adopting Sophi were 1) for his children so they could have a good relationship with their half-sister 2) Sophi was an innocent child and did not deserve to be punished for the sins of her biological parents and 3) Sophi helped fill a hole in his heart caused by his ex-wife’s betrayal.
I think that was the strongest man I've ever hear about. This story made me realize that I have alot to learn as a man. It's still a shitty situation but what a role model for those kids. Bravo!
This story had enough Heart for almost anyone” I loved all the story and it would have been nice to give hi lady a second chance but he didn’t but still cared for Clair and sofey is so sdorable I wish I could have been their as at least a friend to share such a wonderful girr Red l “ thank you for this Heart felt story it’s now my favorite👍👍👍👍👍❤️👀👌👍👀
I love the way this man handle this situation. I hope he finds a woman who can love him completely without cheating on him. You do not find this type of guy everyday. This lady really messed up.
Isn't it amazing how often they do it unprotected just when she's most fertile, shame she didn't give hubby the honour. I do have a lot of respect for this guy as he handled it all like a boss, and the fact he adopted Sophie to keep her with her siblings so she wouldn't continually feel sad and left out. Adopting the girl is a choice, staying married and unknowingly raising her whilst still married is a different matter.
Nice story. One thing. I'm doubtful this was a one time thing. Could be but I really doubt it. I mean how would the affair partner's wife even find out about it if it was just once. Maybe he confessed but he doesn't seem the type to do that if he was so quick to abandon the daughter. And what are the odds that the one and only time she cheats she gets pregnant. Sure it's possible but doesn't sound likely.
Wow, this story spurred SO MANY THOUGHTS (see below) even though it seems like a creative writing exercise. This story made me very sad at first but then gave me joy due to Ben's humanity and Ben and Sophie's positive outcomes.
I believe this is a much deeper story regarding Claire than meets the eye. Some of my comments are reasonable deduction and some are speculation based on life experience. First of all, women can get pregnant from having sex one time but it usually takes NUMEROUS attempts to get pregnant, especially in her mid-late 30's as Claire was in the story. Also, women frequently become pregnant by their affair partners because, due to the excitement of the affair, they have intercourse with the affair partner and not husband (who they are no longer sexually attracted to) when they are ovulating (in estrous), they often don't use contraception due to the excitement and they orgasm more intensely due to the excitement, which increases the chance of pregnancy. Lastly, she was having sex with Ben every day and failed to become pregnant before she was impregnated by the co-worker. I believe Claire was monkey branching to the co-worker (I assume it was her boss) and saw her husband as a beta. I believe she got pregnant intentionally and wanted to marry the co-worker but the co-worker wasn't interested in a relationship with her, just a fling. In addition, the co-worker's wife would likely never know about the affair, nor Ben, if it was a one-time fling. Women almost always slow drip the story when they get caught in a lie. Also, everyone should know that you don't invite an adult non-family member of the opposite sex into your hotel room unless you are planning to have sex. Even if she was not already having an affair, she planned to have sex with the co-worker that night by having several drinks with him and bringing him back to her room.
Claire was incredibly selfish. She broke up 2 families and would have aborted Sophie to reconcile with Ben. Her incredibly selfish behaviors regarding Sophie while Sophie was in the womb seal the deal for me in terms of believing this was definitely not a one-time "one-time mistake". Claire was willing to do whatever she needed to guarantee the outcome she desired. I believe she had an on-going affair with the co-worker and likely cheated with others before cheating with the co-worker if she had the opportunity with a male who she saw as higher value than Ben.
A wife cheating on her husband is the ultimate betrayal because it usually means she has lost interest (greatly reduced or cut off sex) and respect for her husband and, in this case, is at risk for getting pregnant and having another man's baby. Ben handled the betrayal like a boss (except the hugging it out with Claire part); however, it's hard for me to believe he got primary custody of the kids in the current legal environment but, if he did, hats off to him.
Ben is a saint. It touched my heart that Ben took Sophie under his wing. She was a sweet little girl that was a victim of her mother and biological father's incredible selfishness. Ben did his part to create harmony between the Ben’s kids and Sophie by becoming Sophie's father and provided Sophie with self-esteem by taking Sophie under his wing. The only thing I would have done differently is not adopt Sophie until she was an adult so I would not be potentially subject to child support. My speculation as to why Claire never dated or remarried is that she was actually "punching above her weight" with Ben. That is why she carried a torch for Ben for so long. Yes, the co-worker was willing to have a fling with Claire but not commit to Claire yet this gave Claire the impression that she could get a higher value man than Ben.
I have seen several people suggest that Ben should have reconciled with Claire. To even consider reconciling, I would first require Claire to submit to a lie-detector test to see if this was a "one-time mistake" or a pattern of behavior. Any lies or lies by omission (slow dripping the truth) would have caused me to follow Ben's path. When a woman cheats on her husband, she has lost respect for him. Claire may have never have cheated on Ben again but that is unlikely and the level of betrayal, by consciously having unprotected sex with the co-worker and getting pregnant when there are numerous methods of contraception, is almost impossible to recover from. Men are visual creatures and Ben would have never been able to get the picture of Claire having sex with the co-worker out of his mind not to mention Claire knowingly putting herself in a position to become impregnated by the co-worker. Remaining single is Claire's penance for betraying a high-value man and destroying two families due her lust and selfishness.
Well stated and many good points, I agree with you on most of your points. We will never exactly know what the real reason for her job ending abruptly is. As far as Ben adopting Sophie, he knew the risk, and he weighed it carefully. Remember, Claire was never allowed to come back home as a family again. You mentioned she may have cheated with other co-worker's, with that being sai, the other two kids may not be his either. I would have done a DNA test on the other's two kids. Lastly Ben may have never known about the affair until Claire was served with legal notice of AOA from AP wife who was filing for the divorce on her husband.
I agree with almost everything you mentioned. Especially about it being just a one-time thing. You know the AP wouldn't have owned up to it with his wife so how did she find out? I'm surprised OP didn't contact the AP's wife to get more detail or join the meeting his ex had with her AP's wife's lawyers to get more info. I think he dropped the ball there. Where I disagree somewhat is with regards to his "hugging it out" with her all the time or even the sharing the bed "spooning" or whatever you want to call it. Whether this was intentional or not he played the long game of coddling her feelings and emotions which is what we know all women gauge their actions and responses on. This (again knowingly or unknowingly) kept her in a state of wanting to fix what she had done and leaving her open to being cordial and accepting of his plans as he moved forward. Any other route of treatment towards her may have resulted in a much more difficult path going forward if she had become angry and petty as some do when they are left in a more emotionally brutal fashion, but that's just my opinion, for what it's worth.
I've read responses on Quora that addressed folks who are thinking of cheating on their partner. Many times, former cheaters (or cheaters) state to think hard before letting 20 minutes destroy their relationship. That's it.. 20 minutes. I'm gonna bet the AP just wanted a "quickie" and didn't last one minute longer. I'm also gonna bet Clair sugar-coated her story and hid the fact that this wasn't a one-time mistake, but was the result of an ongoing emotional affair. She confused being content with being unhappy in her marriage and wanted to feel "alive". She made the choice to cheat, thinking she's never get caught. She left the company NOT because she knew she did something wrong, but because she realized her AP saw her as nothing more than a gullible, attention-seeking 304. Good for this guy for adopting Sophie, without reconciling. He doesn't NEED Clair. He''ll never trust her and live the rest of his life always wondering who she's with and where she's at. Good for him for finding a better woman in the end, as well.
It's typical for these dumb a$$ 304's to think their AP gives a s#it about them. There is another open marriage story where the wife gets it on with her boss, only to learn from overhearing his conversation with another worker, that to him, she's a pleasant distraction and that he was surprised how easy it was to get her in the bedroom. And, BTW, he's also engaged. Reality bites!
As long as the OP didn’t take the ex back than it’s okay. I’m glad his ex is miserable and should have kept her legs closed, but imagine if the OP wasn’t home when Sophie snuck out of the house?
That’s one way to look at it / another way to look at it is that he’s a chump. His wife knew he was a chump and treated him like the chump he is… fucked scumbag men raw and had a baby that isn’t his 😂😂😂 chump of the decade
Wow. What a great story. This guy is truly a great man and he showed great strength. This is an awesome channel. I enjoy the clear reading as well as the way you concisely point out the lessons. Well done!
I adopted 3 kids plus had my own daughter to this day I love all them equally and they are doing great just because a father did the right thing in bad circumstances this is true Man who loves families and his role in nature my God bless him in all things.
This woman would never have told her husband the child might not be his. She would have taken the affair to the grave and let him bring up that kid as his own.
Very interesting story. Even though he ended up doing something that seemed the most "beta" attitude ever as adopting a child from his wife's affair, there's no point throughout the story I would call this man weak, on the contrary. By not putting himself in the situation of accepting the affair and trying to work things out and by putting all the social and legal barriers to not have to deal with another man's child, I take it as a strong "alpha" attitude.
Thank you ! This story is Aces! So enjoyable even rears up 👍I do w we ish he could have givin Clair a try just be c shot but it didn’t work but still loved the story😊❤️❤️❤️🥰👀👍👍
Yeah, he never did that. What are the odds that her story that it was a one time thing is total BS. I'd say the odds are 99.9%. But at least he divorced her.
@@stevecarey2030 yep. I hate that he didn't even attempt to investigate outside of asking her what happened , and we know cheaters will minimize to reduce consequences. He should have questioned the A.P. if possible as well
In my many years of listening to these types of stories, this story tugged at my heart this guy handled everything with such class. I could learn a lot from this man! I have crazy high respect for him and what he did. When my ex wife cheated, gas lit me and just fucked w my head. I handled every thing like a bitch. Never again!
I immediately broke down after picturing little Sophie at the end of the driveway waving bye and crying. I too was the child left behind on countless occasions. All I ever wished was to feel included in the lives of my siblings. The selfish, narcissistic adults who raised us always put themselves ahead of us kids. Since those lonely days I have worked hard to build a good life for myself and now have a loving wife and two beautiful children. To me this man is a hero for putting his pride aside and caring for that sweet angel who, as he wisely stated in his story, is completely innocent and deserves a chance to have a happy life. I have listened to many of these cases now but this one really got to me. Many thanks to the operator(s) of the channel. This thought provoking content really inspires me to improve myself in ways I didn’t even realize I needed to. Im sure it is doing the same for many others as well.
Jon - Thank you for sharing your story. It's great to hear you have a loving family and a wonderful life now after going through some difficult times when you were young. This story is one that has struck a cord with many people, even those who tend not to get emotional. Though some may disagree, I think this guy handled things very well. He's definitely a selfless person, and most people couldn't or wouldn't choose to do what he did, but in the long run, he was rewarded for his sacrifices. Thanks again for sharing your story and for watching the channel. Best of luck to you and your family. FYA
Thank you for tuning in to watch the premier of my latest video. Let me know in the comments what you think about the man in this story. Do you think he was strong or do you think he acted weak? My thoughts may surprise you.
![Lp. Сердце Вселенной #60 РОЖДЕНИЕ ЛОЛОЛОШКИ [Финал] • Майнкрафт](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/YoR0pAV9FVQ/mqdefault.jpg)
Very touching story with how Ben opened his heart for Sophie. He said she deserved a happy life when his wife mentioned having a procedure, and then he was big-hearted enough to make sure she was loved like she deserved. He wouldn't give his ex another chance, but he gave an innocent girl a chance. He's a good, strong man and an amazing father.
Wow what a story!😢 I was nearly in tears! Such a sad story this Ben is a wonderful person, a truly wonderful man!❤
He still showed luv ❤️ & care for Claire after what she did to him!
He's a simp that got played
My heart would have melted too if I saw Sophi waving her little hand crying as I was driving away. She's a victim in all of this as much as Ben is.
Forreal
Exactly. You would have made of stone to drive away. I live the fact he adopted her. She's the only dad she's known
I had to listen to the end twice it was so touching. I can put myself in his shoes. Little girls are the cutest and sweetest things on the planet.
Definitely I would leave her...I don't care if the kid is cute...it's not mine. This guy is pathetic. I would even test the other kids.
That's one affair that he knows about.
Yep, and highly likely it was an ongoing affair. When the other guys ex-wife discovered the affair he ended it with the wife of the OP. So she was left without the AP but with his baby and knowing that his ex-wife hates her and blames her for that divorce. She must have been guessing that the AP's ex-wife will likely contact her husband, the OP, to inform him of the affair. The legal letter effectively did the same thing. The OP never suspected anything so he wouldn't have known if she had lots of other affairs prior to this. Any woman who is willing to cheat once is willing to cheat all the time.
Right, aint no way that was the one and only time.
Her affair wasn't a one time thing. It was just the one time she absolutely couldn't cover up. Anyway, he's a far better man than me.
Classic truckel truth. She couldn't deny they had sex, so tried to minimize it by claiming they only did it once.
Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Extreme BS from her end.
Yep she would’ve happily lied to him and let him raise another man’s child.
Yep. Named in her AP'S divorce meant it was ongoing and the AP'S ex-wifes discovered it. She lied to her husband about the extent of the affair. I would think it's almost certain she knew it was the AP'S baby as soon as she realised she was pregnant. She probably considered it a thrill until AP'S wife exposed the truth.
The simple fact that he discovered the affair and she was never going to tell speaks very loud...
Ben is an earth angel. He’s one in a billion, and Clair really effed up. She’ll never find another guy like him, and the fact that Clair didn’t know that, or worse, DID know that, and STILL betrayed him the way she did, just tells me she’s a heartless, evil, SELFISH woman.
Ben is a sucker, Clair knows she has a weak man and she's taking full advantage of it. Women only treat men the way men teach them to. Ben taught Clair to treat him like a doormat so she did. Had he have spine n high standards for himself he'd never let no woman do him like that.
@@tyronethomas5761 📠! Completely agree!
@@tyronethomas5761 - I think both can be true. If you truly love an innocent child, you can’t just turn that off.
@@TheBerkeleyBeauty you're not a man, you'll NEVER understand what it feels like to find out an offspring you believe is biologically yours turns out to be made by some other man and your resources have been used to raise their seed. We are programmed to pass on n care about OUR genes not other men's DNA. Understand this, men don't care about "innocent kid" we care about our GENETICALLY innocent kid. It's selfish n cold but that's survival, my resources are for MY genetic legacy, not another man's legacy.
@@tyronethomas5761yes. Exactly.
(gets to the part where he sees the affair child crying and, with NO hesitation, asks to take her with them)
...Dangit, OP. Giving me man tears here.
"It only happened once". Yeah, right!!
That's all it takes.
@@kenolson3064 It happened more than once... it's pretty obvious from how she acted.
This was just the time she got caught.
@@kenolson3064 Timeline says it’s happened more than once.
She was barely pregnant when the AP wife’s lawyer sent the letter, it takes time to get the evidence and file the paperwork.
There are also some pretty stringent rules about what kind of evidence is required for Alienation of Affection. A one time, out of town affair couldn’t provide the evidence needed.
Had OP contacted the AP wife, he would have known everything.
But you can tell by the story that he didn’t want to know.
Bro would have never known if that letter didn't show up.
The biggest lie told in this story is that Claire had a one-time romp with her AP. It's much more than likely she had an ongoing affair which eventually led to her pregnancy. Most women require multiple times over a period of months for pregnancy to occur. Also, unless this story is more than 2 decades old, there is the morning after pill sold over-the-counter she could have taken to prevent the pregnancy. I think, deep down inside, she viewed her husband's "nice guy" ways as the weakness of a simpish man and lost some respect for him as he was too nice and accommodating to her. I'm glad he did not reconcile with her as the relationship would have never been what it once was.
Agreed.
This!
One time or many times, it doesn't matter. If she gets spoiled, discard her.
Did you know that when women are ovulating their sexual appetite and signs of arousal are heightened? It's as if her body senses it is ready to be pregnant and directs the brain in that regard. My ex wife and I always used protection except exactly once. She got pregnant, (and later aborted)
Yeah, it only takes one time. No, not in all cases. Reading this comment before listening to the story but I have no doubt OP'S wife probably had a ongoing relationship with her affair partner/ partners.
This story is very touching, and I find the narrator admirable. Also, hearing that the man's state has a presumption of paternity for married men made me rethink the issue of mandatory paternity testing. Since cheating by women has become so prevalent, I think that if a state can require men to take legal action to remove the presumption of paternity, then it could instead require women to prove paternity before putting a man's name on the birth certificate.
@@ripvanwinkle3432 nah the cheating women can take care of the kids wtf
This is always been that way, why do you think laws has been like this. The government don’t want to pay for a child, so they don’t want mandatory paternity test.
The court system has made child support a business. They get a cut of the child support money. Do you think they will just give that up. I hear what you are saying and agree with you 💯. But we live in a very corrupt world
This will never happen (in the US) because...money. Title IV incentivizes states to monetize their family court operations. Daddy Gubmint then gives them money to cover their costs. For example, if a state says their family court system cost them $1 billion in public and family assistance payouts, the feds give them $1 billion (or slightly more). BUT if that state mitigated its costs by taking in $850 million from child support and alimony, that state just made $850 million in "profit" that can be used for other slush funds and specious projects. Mandatory paternity tests would increase the cost to the state (who's paying for the tests?) without an offsetting income stream (unless the federal government accepts the cost of the tests by obfuscating the cost by making it a part of Medicaid). I've spoken to lawmakers in several states (NY, PA, VA, MD, DE,NJ) about this. It's a political non-starter.
@@hdcvo2570 there's always the change that would solve all of the paternity issues, stop giving government assistance to the 304s popping out kid after kid.
No way she has several drinks with a work colleague and then invited him into her hotel room with out having the intention of having s-time. She thought so little of her husband she even went bareback with her coworker endangering her husband’s life with the possibility of a STD.
It was an ongoing affair, not a one-time thing.
Good story. I think this guy is the most level headed man that has written a story online.
Except he didn't appear to realise that his ex-wife was obviously cheating longterm. He appears to go along with her story that she got pregnant from her one and only time cheating. It was an ongoing affair, that's why she was named in her AP'S divorce case
I cannot honestly believe that men like this exist. A great example of a stellar human being. Truly kings amongst men. God bless him. He deserves all the happiness.
They do exist, but females like this scares the crap out of most men. Why do you think marriage rate is 6 out 1000?
@@hdcvo2570 agreed.
They do exist, you just don’t hear about it because females don’t give or talk about heir men being this good. We are mostly looked as a walking wallets.
You have to be kidding right?!
This man is a fool and a simp for taking on another man’s spawn. This is disgusting!
@@rogerruhland8897 he did not st first. But that little girl was so much in love with this man not knowing that he was not her father. he accepted the child because she had nothing to do with her 304 mother's screw ups.
This is one of the most heart wrenching stories I’ve heard , Ben is one hell of a man . Claire screwed up big time and she knows it. Normally I have 0 sympathy for cheaters but I think she has truly repented
He's a simp😂
I agree.
I’m happiest for this father and the kids. People are going too soft on his ex - she’s responsible for breaking up two marriages, hiding her betrayal from the husband, tried to strap her husband with a child that wasn’t his, destroyed the family of the little girl that moved to Seattle, and was willing to punish the innocent child she’d created by causing her to bear the brunt of her adulterous act. And had her husband wanted her to abort..she’d likely have done so.
doesn't matter, cheating isn't shiz isn't end all be all
she loved this man realizedher mistake, and wasn't with
anyone for 17 years and lets be clear if your wife is a cheater
if she is that willing you work it out move on
she was truly sorry
if she isn't willing to work it out or she isn't remorseful etc
but ben fucked up, he shoulda reconciled and been with her
he clearly loves her and she clearly loves him
and lets be clear many woman leave their man
do horrible thiings etc she didnt
she was truly sorry and proved she did love him
and honestly if your wife really does love you
which any man can see from this story
you stay and work it out
17 years of no one else
there's a reason marriage fails in this day and age
you all don't know how to do a marriage properly
there are obvious times of cheating where you just leave
but if she wants to work it out etc serious and tries
you are just as bad if not worse then the cheater
you put your pathetic pride over your family
at the very least you try to work it out
and the man lied to himself, he clearly got over her being a hoe
because he was there for her the entire time, you dont' do that
it was his sense of "oh she cheated i can't look at her the same"
but if that's true why be nice console her etc
he was too much focused on oh she cheated on me
rather then lets make this work
he never raged at her, so seriously
at the very least try
imagine 17 years he has a loving devoted wife
you don't cry over one act and end it
you build good memories over the bad and move on
that's what a real man does if he still loves his wife
and she's truly remorseful
most cases you probably just leave if they aren't
but when she clearly is and you don't even try
you threw away the love of your life for 0 reason
she is YOUR wife, she fukt up, MOVE ON
marriage is for good and bad and honestly
if you aren't outraged enough to divorce and cut
her out of your life completely then you deserve
it for yourself to try again
why would you wanna halt your happiness
you're just as bad as the cheater if you ruin
the rest of your life refusing to get past one moment
again if she was mean or not turning from her sin
i'd be all for it but no she did deserve a second chance
he starved himself of love for 10 years
for 0 reason
treat marriage as sacred or it won't be sacred
@andrewtatian7495 you have wondered off the farm and lost reality. If she cheats, she's for the streets. When you put together all the actions this woman did which the OP here laid out.... she is an evil, vile, pathetic, manipulative, horrible human being. If a spouse thinks they can get away with something then they most likely will try to. Make sure it is clear up front..... You cheat, it's done. Period. There is never and will ever be a good enough reason or circumstance to justify it. Show her the front door
Yeap, saved by the man agin. Of course if she went to dark path, they would’ve blamed the of course.
@@andrewtatian7495 What!?
@@andrewtatian7495 "if she wants to work it out serious and tries you are just as bad if not worse then the cheater" wtf are you on about? yes ppl can reconcile but in no way shape or form would you be just as bad or worse than the cheater lmao talk about victim blaming smh. crazy thing about this If it was the MAN who cheated and had a baby outside the marriage most ppl wouldn't have this much sympathy.
I'm gonna give you, the presenter, some props here. There are some similar channels here that would probably rip the guy a new one for "simping" for the little girl and being kind to his ex. I'm with you on validating this guy's integrity.
Or stupidity
That was one of most beautiful story I ever heard it brought tears to my eyes thank you so much for this beautiful story ❤️ !
I'm 46 and been through the same thing as this man and I cried at the end
He's a better man than me because when my young wife 22 years ago became pregnant with her lovers child , I was so broken I couldn't stand to even look at her. Just knowing that the affair baby was a constant reminder of her destroying my life and set my world on fire, I had no strength or peace to function properly.
I always wondered what would of happened if I would have handled it like this guy in the story. he's a better man than I could ever be
*sigh... you did the best you could man. We are all created differently with vastly different levels of empathy, compassion and pain tolerance. If this story is even real, the OP has absolutely elite levels of empathy, etc... More than any man I personally know. I strongly suspect you did the best you could at the time.
He is not a better man than you, you did the right thing. Only beta males and simps stay and raise another man’s baby after the mother cheated on him. This is a good story but OP is still beta
You did the correct thing because staying with your wife and an affair child would have been pure torment for you daily.
Ben is a wonderful loving man but he is a man with moral standards.
Claire really blew up her life with her affair. I have grave doubts that they only did it only once.
It is indeed a blessing that a wonderful daughter was the product of the affair. Sophi is a beautiful loving girl who instinctively realised that Ben is a loving, caring and thoughtful man.
His adoption of her was a marvellous action.
I also think that Ben's new wife quickly realised that he was a man with great morals and is a wonderful caring parent. The way Ben writes about his wife he is a confirmed monogamist and deeply loved her.
Claire destroyed her marriage with the affair. Selfish actions can have devestating results.
The OP (Ben) is a true king 🤴. Some may call him a doormat, but I don't think so. Why? For one thing, from the moment he found out about his ex-wife's affair and pregnancy, he ALWAYS covered his LEGAL bases. Very smart on his part. Secondly, he comes out smelling like a rose 🌹. In the end, he wins. Kudos to him (and good on him for NOT taking his ex-wife back).
I agree, just cause someone acted the way he did doesn't make him a door mat. He had no reason to bring out his firmness till it was needed.
Being a door mat would be caving in to the ex wife and not divorcing her.
He's a father through and through. He understood that compromising himself would have been unhealthy for himself and then affect the children.
He accepted his unknowns and acted accordingly. He didn't know how he would act towards the mother, or how he would feel about Sophi. I'm so glad things worked out for them.
Na, he’s a sucker, and his wife knew he was a sucker so did him dirty 😂
Gentlemen - women will treat you the way you let them treat you! If you are a sucker, they will pick it up and treat you like a sucker like this guy. Don’t be a chump.
By taking care of himself FIRST; it allowed him to make such giving moves! BUT, he NEVER took her back!!
He killed her with kindness.
Man this one was a real tear jerker. Upgrade this guys man card. OP was just a good man.
he is a Good and great Man,
There's a big difference between a nice man and a good man. A good man's kindness comes from strength and a nice man's comes from weakness.
It's ALWAYS the Good Decent men that get betrayed and used & Abused
I Beleive i never said a Nice Guy.???
@@johnzammit-nv4xv never said you did, that's my own narrative. Get over yourself.
This is my favorite one of your videos. A child is never responsible for who their parents are or what they have done.
Would start vomiting if my wife was pregnant by another man. Disgusting. I certainly don't believe her story that it was a one-off. It was an ongoing affair, that's why she was named in the other guys divorce. Also we must assume she planned for that guy to make her pregnant. A cheating spouse would be VERY careful not to get pregnant unless she had already decided she is happy to have a baby with him. Knowing her husband also wanted another baby made it easy to pass a baby off as his until the affair was exposed.
Was thinking she actually got fired and didn't quit. He should have called her office and confirmed her quitting. Bet the AP's ex-wife contacted the office an got them both fired
@@benjin3993 Yes, you are probably correct. She 'suddenly' quit her job when AP'S wife names her in a divorce. Sounds like she was fired.
Also I would assume she knew from the start the baby was AP'S, probably hoping for a different outcome with AP until reality set in.
@@benjin3993 Very likely
That was a great story and the ethics are what is needed theses days!!
THIS GUY IS SUPERMAN! Ouch, she knows what she lost. He showed her all the way until the end. Hats off.
Damn... that little girl 👧 really knows how to melt a man's 👨 heart ❤
They all do!
@@johnulmer6715 you ain't lying, my daughter does that every day
Learned from her Mother.
@@JDWDMC 😂
Have you heard of Barney Stinson?
He gave Sophie a great dad. She will be a better woman because she had such a great dad
F--- Sophie! "Not my pig, not my farm" would have been my attitude. Some revenge would have been in order...
@@timwarcloud vengeance is mine saith the Lord
@TRUTHandLIGHT4809 " God forgives, Outlaws don't." Figure it out...
definitely an excellent father for the children. He showed gentleness with his ww and the unborn child. He had his priorities straight and took responsibility where he saw it.
Here's another woman claiming that it was just " a mistake ". Let me remind you gentlemen, and any ladies who happen to be listening, this is never just " a mistake. " This is a series of decisions! Tens, hundreds, and in some cases thousands of decisions, all made to have an affair. This isn't just a random error, this is someone who doesn't deserve the good spouse that they have.
Spreading your legs for some random and letting him nut inside you doesn't just happen.
She is a CC rider. Never stopped. He was the ATM. The End.
Yes! It is a series of calculated betrayals. She doesn't deserve a good husband. She threw away everything real (him, the children, the family) to play out her fantasies as a wh*re. Now, her wh*redom is her reality and having a good husband is her fantasy. I hope those children grow up to not be like her.
@@brandonmatthews3722 it's crazy cuz if she had sex fantasies she could have act them all out with the husband. Any sane husband would be happy with a wife who wants to experiment sexually between the two of them.
@@ethosterros9430 IKR! You would think that she would really awaken the "savage beast" in her husband. And keep the safety, security, provision, etc. that he would work to uphold. I guess it wasn't forbidden enough. Go figure!
Man I was bawling when Sophie was at the end of the.driveway
Kick ass story. I cried, not gonna lie. The narrarator did an awesome job adding in his own views, warnings, and life lessons.
Sophi is a very lucky girl, OP avoided her being aborted and later adopted her. She has a real man as her father.
He's not her "father". He's a simp! I would have tossed mother and bastard both out into the street.
Real man?!! Excuse me?!! OP did a good thing. Who do you think you are making fun of OP like that. Real men are suckers as women raise them to be. He's a decent human being. That's it. I get sick of this real man BS. At best OP is a good guy. At worse, he's a sucker. I wouldn't do it though. The mother was trying to un@\°v€ her daughter. Shed only end up suffering over it. And I would watch. Heck I would drain the rest of my savings just to see both my w#@®€ egg donor and my traitor of my mother writhe in agony until I starved to d€@√H, voiding my bowelz right on that chair. OP is a foolish but noble man.
This story is very sad, but actions have consequences. The ex made a series of decisions that gradually broke down walls until eventually she committed adultery. She did all she could to repent, but op, understanding his limitations, protected all involved as best as he could. The divorce was a necessary step, which preped him emotionally to adopt the innocent child. He being in the child's life probably afforded her a measure of normalcy in her life. This story is so tragic but reflects the realities of life. We need to be ever vigilant to attacks on our happiness. I wish all involved peace and joy in their futures.
this is one of the most saddest story. Claire's actions of infidelity has impacted so many lives. Her 3 kids, Ex Husband, AP, AP's wife, and AP's children. The sad part is she is NEVER getting her husband back. Actions have consequences and this one was huge.
This man is amazing. God bless him. After being bitterly betrayed and lied to he still remained a complete gentleman.
This guy is an alpha champ. He kept his head on right, focused on his kids, and didn't waste his energy on hate.
This story almost had me in tears at work
He got an extra daughter and kept the cheater at arm's way. Win-win. The important part is that he made the choice to care for and love this child. He wasn't bullied, coerced or told to "Man up".
One of the best I've read in a long, long time. This kind hearted man made the best of an awful situation and saved the life of a little girl who he owed nothing to. It speaks volumes to the kind of man he is and his ex-wife, who ruined her life, thankfully didn't ruin the life of the little girl thanks entirely to Ben.
Ben is a simp! A real man would've caused her hell. F--- that whole and her ill-conceived bastard.
Truly heartbreaking. I would’ve done everything he did except adopt her, I wouldn’t want to be legally tied up. It’s fortunate the wife was passive and remorseful, she could’ve been a real devil and made everything difficult.
In many cases, divorces can often be unnesecessarily vindictive and very often it is the children who suffer the brunt of the blow. In many cases, the divorce could happen completely amicable and the two partners can seperate without any drama or fights. The children would have connection to both parents and while they may be sad for a while as they grow up they would understand the reason for it.
In many cases, this would also extend family networks for the children if their parents remarried with other families. A sad situation was turned into a neutral situation by this guy, and it is an example really for many people.
Then you've never been under the spell of small children. I have kids and no material wealth could replace them. Legal cost can be costly but mental imprisonment because you could have done the right thing can be a life sentence
I loved this story! He did great! And is blessed witt try h a wonderful fsmily👍👍👍👀
Ben sounds like a another form of Jesus. He did something that most men won’t be able to do. He thought about his family more than anything, that’s what a real man do.
Like the cheating wives, I see a lot of the cuckolded husbands are also just thinking about me me me me me and me. Understandable but whatever to forgiveness and vow of for better or worse?
Jesus was a simp...pathetic...don't know why you people worship him.
When I first read the title I was like tf is wrong with dude, but after hearing it, I honestly couldn’t do it, but I understand completely, lil girl sounded really sweet
Dude is just a cuck and accepted it.
Dude was a chump and is passing his chumpness off as virtue.
@@Witnessmoo Sorry but Sophie won his heart. I think part of the reason he was able to be the father of Sophie is because his ex wife gave him an amicable divorce.
the "Sophi part are so cute " i love this story, thanks .
bro this man, he is a Godsend. He is by far one of the most amazing people I've ever heard of holy crap.
That’s a great story for real. That dude stepped up and became that girls father even though he didn’t need to and the situation that happened. That’s the real dude right there
That's a Simp! I could have given 2 shits about the little bastard.
He's a weak doormat and he's a disgrace to real men everywhere!!
I just wonder how it would have turned out if he never found the letter. This guy Ben is my hero
It sucks about affair kids, it is not their fault how they were conceived. It is the ex-wife's fault and AP, and the AP is more of piece of crap. With the exception of calming his ex with hugs, the Op handle everything else level headed. Wish we could hear more about his relationship with Sophie.
Yes Please we would like to hear more about Sophie and you Kids. Thanks.
Yes, I would like that
As a former step father.... there is nothing more precious then a child you choose or you birth, just different
Class is the word I'd use to describe this man
Our hero here is stoic. He did right by Sofie and his other two kids. He also let his ex have the consequences of her actions.
By her account she willingly made possible the encounter she admits to and ruined the trust in their marriage.
I can't man. When he said Sophie was standing there waving and had tears on her face. I woulda broke too. Good for him. Usually I'd say eff that lol
Great story! I think many of us can relate to both Ben and Claire. It’s also a great example of the long term consequences, to all involved, for even one episode of cheating.
Can't relate to Clair at all. Her behavior is not in my wiring.
One episode??? Do you really believe that. She was named in the other divorce. The other ex-wife would only have found out her name if it was an ongoing affair. And she was happy to let the AP make her pregnant.
@@columkenn good point.
So, she quit but keep the contacting AP.
Another....stupid thing. Based on the story, AP initiate the cheating. So, why on earth didnt OP sue AP as well.
@@eleethtahgra7182 Actually No. The story shows she initiated the cheating by inviting the AP to her hotel room. We don't know how long they were cheating previously but that's why she was named in the other divorce. She planned the cheating, but it must have been ongoing and his wife found out. It's more likely the AP ended the affair rather than her because his wife discovered it and knew who she was. She only listed that one time she got pregnant in this account. She also didn't use protection means she really was planning the AP make her pregnant and she could easy pass it off as her husbands. A cheater will be VERY careful not to get pregnant unless she has decided in advance that she is happy for pregnancy to occur. It's possible through the passion of their affair that she fantasised AP would leave his wife when pregnant and start new marriage with him, but the AP closed that avenue afterwards, so she had to pass it off as her husbands. Also she wasn't surprised by the letter from the AP'S ex-wifes lawer, so the AP had probably informed her his wife caught them and legal action was coming. Added to her pregnancy she had time in advance to invent the story of it just being one night only. Her falling to her knees the moment he showed her the letter suggests she knew this was coming and was dreading it. I would be certain she knew from the start that the baby was AP'S and not her husbands. Whatever her thoughts she definitely planned pregnancy with the AP
She definitely cheated more than once...
Man that was a powerful story !
You can call this guy a simp, but in reality he is doing what he can to protect an innocent life. He's a stand up guy. Excessive stress during pregnancy can lead to birth defects, or other serious long term problems.
No he's a simp. We need to stop sugar coating all the bs, that's why things have gotten so bad now because men keep giving other men a pass for the bs.
@@TheChocolateChamp Its been a month and I watch a lot of these types of videos. But if memory serves, he did dump her. To my mind a SIMP would stay with her and be a family. What he did was adopt his kid's half sister so she could have as good a life as his kids. She is an innocent victim in all this. He is not forgiving the cheating wife. And let's hope she doesn't go get knocked up again.
@@scottys1423 i agree with you. He also knew himself too well, he is a sucker for children. This story always brings me to tears.
This guy was far from a simp! He never touched her again sexually and remarried. How is he a simp. I only see a powerful strong human man that has better moral values than 99% of the earth.
Look we need to stop calling all men who do this a simp. True , most men couldn’t do it. I definitely couldn’t… but, I wouldn’t take out my frustration on a innocent child. If anything, I’m glad there is men out there like him. Before I’m criticized… I was raised by a man , who isn’t my biological dad. Yet, I know for I fact I couldn’t do it. Raise someone else’s child. So it does take a special type of person to raise someone else’s child. So please stop calling these men simps.
What bothers me about many of these stories is how the guilty wife begs and pleads her soon-to-be-ex husband to stay, and how she'll do *anything* to keep him to make up for her mistake. My experience was the complete opposite, as my ex continued to treat me poorly and was unwilling to make amends at all once the affair was out in the open. That treatment and attitude toward me made me feel like that much less of a man, that I should be cheated on and discarded. It's been so hard to get over the deception and rejection of the last several years, but praise God that I met and married a wonderful woman who has blessed me immensely. I still have to work hard at being a more confident, decisive and assertive man, but I realize that I cannot give into past feelings of inferiority. Stay strong to the faithful men out there!!
Damn dude. Hella heart felt when the child and the man met. Hella emotions
This man is on a winning streak. Got rid of a cheating wife but gained a daughter and a new relationship.
I applaud you for allowing an innocent child Sophie into your kind ❤️, thankyou for being a awesome Father to Sophie, FatherGod Himself Bless you and all your children as they are all precious and the most valuable gifts you will ever hold in your hands Welldone.
I think the reasons for adopting Sophi were 1) for his children so they could have a good relationship with their half-sister 2) Sophi was an innocent child and did not deserve to be punished for the sins of her biological parents and 3) Sophi helped fill a hole in his heart caused by his ex-wife’s betrayal.
Best story yet. Kudos to Ben and his relationship with the affair child.
the story of one fantastic man. an example of a stand up guy.
I think that was the strongest man I've ever hear about. This story made me realize that I have alot to learn as a man. It's still a shitty situation but what a role model for those kids. Bravo!
Congratulations to this host. He is a great story teller who gives only precise and concise comment on important details.
A little girl can always melt the heart of the hardest of men
Depends on the heart to be melted!
There is nothing cuter or sweeter on this planet than a little girl. It’s not even close.
This story had enough Heart for almost anyone” I loved all the story and it would have been nice to give hi lady a second chance but he didn’t but still cared for Clair and sofey is so sdorable I wish I could have been their as at least a friend to share such a wonderful girr Red l “ thank you for this Heart felt story it’s now my favorite👍👍👍👍👍❤️👀👌👍👀
I love the way this man handle this situation. I hope he finds a woman who can love him completely without cheating on him. You do not find this type of guy everyday. This lady really messed up.
Isn't it amazing how often they do it unprotected just when she's most fertile, shame she didn't give hubby the honour.
I do have a lot of respect for this guy as he handled it all like a boss, and the fact he adopted Sophie to keep her with her siblings so she wouldn't continually feel sad and left out. Adopting the girl is a choice, staying married and unknowingly raising her whilst still married is a different matter.
A "boss" would have told her and her illegitimate bastard to F----off!
Wow! What a magnificent story. Thank you for sharing with us. The caliber of such man is infinite.
Nice story. One thing. I'm doubtful this was a one time thing. Could be but I really doubt it. I mean how would the affair partner's wife even find out about it if it was just once. Maybe he confessed but he doesn't seem the type to do that if he was so quick to abandon the daughter. And what are the odds that the one and only time she cheats she gets pregnant. Sure it's possible but doesn't sound likely.
Almost certainly was an ongoing affair. Which also makes it very likely that it wasn't her first affair.
Ben is a good man with a big heart for bringing Sophie into his family.
He's a simp.
Wow, this story spurred SO MANY THOUGHTS (see below) even though it seems like a creative writing exercise. This story made me very sad at first but then gave me joy due to Ben's humanity and Ben and Sophie's positive outcomes.
I believe this is a much deeper story regarding Claire than meets the eye. Some of my comments are reasonable deduction and some are speculation based on life experience. First of all, women can get pregnant from having sex one time but it usually takes NUMEROUS attempts to get pregnant, especially in her mid-late 30's as Claire was in the story. Also, women frequently become pregnant by their affair partners because, due to the excitement of the affair, they have intercourse with the affair partner and not husband (who they are no longer sexually attracted to) when they are ovulating (in estrous), they often don't use contraception due to the excitement and they orgasm more intensely due to the excitement, which increases the chance of pregnancy. Lastly, she was having sex with Ben every day and failed to become pregnant before she was impregnated by the co-worker. I believe Claire was monkey branching to the co-worker (I assume it was her boss) and saw her husband as a beta. I believe she got pregnant intentionally and wanted to marry the co-worker but the co-worker wasn't interested in a relationship with her, just a fling. In addition, the co-worker's wife would likely never know about the affair, nor Ben, if it was a one-time fling. Women almost always slow drip the story when they get caught in a lie. Also, everyone should know that you don't invite an adult non-family member of the opposite sex into your hotel room unless you are planning to have sex. Even if she was not already having an affair, she planned to have sex with the co-worker that night by having several drinks with him and bringing him back to her room.
Claire was incredibly selfish. She broke up 2 families and would have aborted Sophie to reconcile with Ben. Her incredibly selfish behaviors regarding Sophie while Sophie was in the womb seal the deal for me in terms of believing this was definitely not a one-time "one-time mistake". Claire was willing to do whatever she needed to guarantee the outcome she desired. I believe she had an on-going affair with the co-worker and likely cheated with others before cheating with the co-worker if she had the opportunity with a male who she saw as higher value than Ben.
A wife cheating on her husband is the ultimate betrayal because it usually means she has lost interest (greatly reduced or cut off sex) and respect for her husband and, in this case, is at risk for getting pregnant and having another man's baby. Ben handled the betrayal like a boss (except the hugging it out with Claire part); however, it's hard for me to believe he got primary custody of the kids in the current legal environment but, if he did, hats off to him.
Ben is a saint. It touched my heart that Ben took Sophie under his wing. She was a sweet little girl that was a victim of her mother and biological father's incredible selfishness. Ben did his part to create harmony between the Ben’s kids and Sophie by becoming Sophie's father and provided Sophie with self-esteem by taking Sophie under his wing. The only thing I would have done differently is not adopt Sophie until she was an adult so I would not be potentially subject to child support. My speculation as to why Claire never dated or remarried is that she was actually "punching above her weight" with Ben. That is why she carried a torch for Ben for so long. Yes, the co-worker was willing to have a fling with Claire but not commit to Claire yet this gave Claire the impression that she could get a higher value man than Ben.
I have seen several people suggest that Ben should have reconciled with Claire. To even consider reconciling, I would first require Claire to submit to a lie-detector test to see if this was a "one-time mistake" or a pattern of behavior. Any lies or lies by omission (slow dripping the truth) would have caused me to follow Ben's path. When a woman cheats on her husband, she has lost respect for him. Claire may have never have cheated on Ben again but that is unlikely and the level of betrayal, by consciously having unprotected sex with the co-worker and getting pregnant when there are numerous methods of contraception, is almost impossible to recover from. Men are visual creatures and Ben would have never been able to get the picture of Claire having sex with the co-worker out of his mind not to mention Claire knowingly putting herself in a position to become impregnated by the co-worker. Remaining single is Claire's penance for betraying a high-value man and destroying two families due her lust and selfishness.
Well stated and many good points, I agree with you on most of your points. We will never exactly know what the real reason for her job ending abruptly is. As far as Ben adopting Sophie, he knew the risk, and he weighed it carefully. Remember, Claire was never allowed to come back home as a family again. You mentioned she may have cheated with other co-worker's, with that being sai, the other two kids may not be his either. I would have done a DNA test on the other's two kids. Lastly Ben may have never known about the affair until Claire was served with legal notice of AOA from AP wife who was filing for the divorce on her husband.
I agree with almost everything you mentioned. Especially about it being just a one-time thing. You know the AP wouldn't have owned up to it with his wife so how did she find out? I'm surprised OP didn't contact the AP's wife to get more detail or join the meeting his ex had with her AP's wife's lawyers to get more info. I think he dropped the ball there. Where I disagree somewhat is with regards to his "hugging it out" with her all the time or even the sharing the bed "spooning" or whatever you want to call it. Whether this was intentional or not he played the long game of coddling her feelings and emotions which is what we know all women gauge their actions and responses on. This (again knowingly or unknowingly) kept her in a state of wanting to fix what she had done and leaving her open to being cordial and accepting of his plans as he moved forward. Any other route of treatment towards her may have resulted in a much more difficult path going forward if she had become angry and petty as some do when they are left in a more emotionally brutal fashion, but that's just my opinion, for what it's worth.
Ben didn't adopt his wife's affair baby. He adopted his two sons' little sister and made their family whole. I admire him for that.
She had a on going affair....not a ONS. The letter from the attorney proved on going .
Great Story and a Stand Up Man. A Very Responsible Parent and Father.
Thank You for Your Channel!!!
I've read responses on Quora that addressed folks who are thinking of cheating on their partner. Many times, former cheaters (or cheaters) state to think hard before letting 20 minutes destroy their relationship. That's it.. 20 minutes. I'm gonna bet the AP just wanted a "quickie" and didn't last one minute longer. I'm also gonna bet Clair sugar-coated her story and hid the fact that this wasn't a one-time mistake, but was the result of an ongoing emotional affair. She confused being content with being unhappy in her marriage and wanted to feel "alive". She made the choice to cheat, thinking she's never get caught. She left the company NOT because she knew she did something wrong, but because she realized her AP saw her as nothing more than a gullible, attention-seeking 304.
Good for this guy for adopting Sophie, without reconciling. He doesn't NEED Clair. He''ll never trust her and live the rest of his life always wondering who she's with and where she's at. Good for him for finding a better woman in the end, as well.
@L H I love your great comment! Peace, Brother! ROCK ON!
It's typical for these dumb a$$ 304's to think their AP gives a s#it about them. There is another open marriage story where the wife gets it on with her boss, only to learn from overhearing his conversation with another worker, that to him, she's a pleasant distraction and that he was surprised how easy it was to get her in the bedroom. And, BTW, he's also engaged. Reality bites!
As long as the OP didn’t take the ex back than it’s okay. I’m glad his ex is miserable and should have kept her legs closed, but imagine if the OP wasn’t home when Sophie snuck out of the house?
Beautiful story this man has a huge heart.
That’s one way to look at it / another way to look at it is that he’s a chump. His wife knew he was a chump and treated him like the chump he is… fucked scumbag men raw and had a baby that isn’t his 😂😂😂 chump of the decade
She said it meant NOTHING...it makes it ALL the worse. TWO FAMILIES TORN ASUNDER!!! Ben is quite a guy!!!!
Wow. What a great story. This guy is truly a great man and he showed great strength. This is an awesome channel. I enjoy the clear reading as well as the way you concisely point out the lessons. Well done!
I adopted 3 kids plus had my own daughter to this day I love all them equally and they are doing great just because a father did the right thing in bad circumstances this is true Man who loves families and his role in nature my God bless him in all things.
Thank you for the story, this one and all the rest.
You’re right, this one is a tearjerker, but the best ending for this situation.
Great story, a man had Plenty of Love to give in his life, despite the ex-wife Treason behavior.
This woman would never have told her husband the child might not be his. She would have taken the affair to the grave and let him bring up that kid as his own.
Bottom line: DO NOT CHEAT!
Boredom is the key 🔑 that opens cheating wives legs.
Very interesting story. Even though he ended up doing something that seemed the most "beta" attitude ever as adopting a child from his wife's affair, there's no point throughout the story I would call this man weak, on the contrary. By not putting himself in the situation of accepting the affair and trying to work things out and by putting all the social and legal barriers to not have to deal with another man's child, I take it as a strong "alpha" attitude.
Thank you ! This story is Aces! So enjoyable even rears up 👍I do w we ish he could have givin Clair a try just be c shot but it didn’t work but still loved the story😊❤️❤️❤️🥰👀👍👍
That is a real man right there. Ben always made good decisions. Put the kids first . I was almost wishing they would get back together.
He shouldn't have said shit, he should have went straight to the A.P's wife and asked what she knows about their relationship.
Yeah, I'd have gotten more details. In any event, he ditched her.
Yeah, he never did that. What are the odds that her story that it was a one time thing is total BS. I'd say the odds are 99.9%. But at least he divorced her.
@@stevecarey2030 And replaced her. She deserved being shelved.
@@stevecarey2030 yep. I hate that he didn't even attempt to investigate outside of asking her what happened , and we know cheaters will minimize to reduce consequences. He should have questioned the A.P. if possible as well
He was going to divorce her anyways so no point asking.
NEVER take a cheating partner back. Dump that B.
All of your contents are excellent. And the narrator very proficient. And, the best thing, no profanity in being vitally descriptive of the betrayal.
This is the BEST story on this channel
The first thing he should have done was to contact the law firm from the letter and ask to contact the other wife before confronting his own wife.
NGL the Sophie part on the porch broke me
She should have kept a box of The Afterpill in her purse like my ex did😡
Good story. I must admit that he is a better man than me. I couldn’t do it.
Damn that put tears in my eyes 👀
In my many years of listening to these types of stories, this story tugged at my heart this guy handled everything with such class. I could learn a lot from this man! I have crazy high respect for him and what he did. When my ex wife cheated, gas lit me and just fucked w my head. I handled every thing like a bitch. Never again!
I can relate to this guy. Will not bend on his morals yet has a huge heart.
31:43 This brought tears to my eyes and immediately pissed me off, because of how selfish modern women can be. 😭😡
I immediately broke down after picturing little Sophie at the end of the driveway waving bye and crying. I too was the child left behind on countless occasions. All I ever wished was to feel included in the lives of my siblings. The selfish, narcissistic adults who raised us always put themselves ahead of us kids. Since those lonely days I have worked hard to build a good life for myself and now have a loving wife and two beautiful children. To me this man is a hero for putting his pride aside and caring for that sweet angel who, as he wisely stated in his story, is completely innocent and deserves a chance to have a happy life. I have listened to many of these cases now but this one really got to me. Many thanks to the operator(s) of the channel. This thought provoking content really inspires me to improve myself in ways I didn’t even realize I needed to. Im sure it is doing the same for many others as well.
Jon - Thank you for sharing your story. It's great to hear you have a loving family and a wonderful life now after going through some difficult times when you were young.
This story is one that has struck a cord with many people, even those who tend not to get emotional. Though some may disagree, I think this guy handled things very well. He's definitely a selfless person, and most people couldn't or wouldn't choose to do what he did, but in the long run, he was rewarded for his sacrifices.
Thanks again for sharing your story and for watching the channel. Best of luck to you and your family.
FYA
He’s a good man with strong morals!
Thank you for tuning in to watch the premier of my latest video. Let me know in the comments what you think about the man in this story. Do you think he was strong or do you think he acted weak? My thoughts may surprise you.
Strong. He ditched her and took care of the kids as a man could. Wife lost everything.
He is a strong and quality and Level headed good MAN.
@@humansvd3269 No she didn't he STILL simped and gave her half the Assets REMEMBER she said she didn't want them.
@@patrioticaussiesams8581 Probably did it to avoid the court from dictating it.
FYA- I love your channel. Looking forward to more content! This man is exemplary and a good man to look up to. ROCK ON!