One day, late in life, I wrote a message to myself. A list of small things that I should do everyday. I carried that list in my pocket for a year. One of the best things I wrote on that list was speak to a stranger. After many years of social isolation my life began to change for the better. Now I have many new friends that I wouldn't have had if I hadn't made that list.
After stumbling upon amphetamine a few times, I did this to myself, as well as bombarding my friends with voice messages. I wish I was like this naturally.
@@NewelOfKnowledgeyou know you’ve just touched upon one of my greatest struggles and you’re setting me in a better way but dear god I wish I wasn’t autistic.
@@falcon5751 God or not you're exactly who you're meant to be. If there is a creator you're created as intended, if there is no creator you're still the amalgamation of everything before you, not being but forever becoming. I think that's perfect and so are you, perfectly imperfect like the rest of us.
This used to be the norm before we all got sucked into our phones. People had no choice but to communicate, and we were all curious about one another without a slot machine in our pockets to distract us. What you described is the key to connection which is vulnerability. Through your bravery, you discovered that vulnerability is like a muscle to be worked, with endless connections as the reward. Thank you for sharing!
You know what - not really. It was not at all common to just start conversations like this with people in a city like Amsterdam. The person in the video here was brave to just do it - it took him courage exactly because it was an uncommon thing to do and may be met with awkwardness or even hostility. You can still roll that dice and try it today if you wanted, I see people in the parks quite often just sitting there and relaxing - although yes of course there are a number just stuck into their phones.
Not where I'm from. Walking up to strangers and starting conversations has always been uncommon. Still always happens, but also always uncommon. Phones didn't change this that much I think.
@@thelazymanatee2506 It's just people romanticising the times before mobile phones - or using mobile phones for an excuse for their own current habits. "People had no choice but to communicate - we were all curious about one another" - lol in what world was this? People just walked past each other on the street as they do now.
Love this! I think everyone needs to re-connect socially, and NOT on social media. Face to face contact and genuine expression, meaningful conversations. Learning about each other, heightening empathy and opening each other up to opportunities. More human. 👏
"I'm lonely - can I have a conversation with you?" That's so beautiful and profound. Do you know how few people would say that? Speaking with strangers is such a lovely experience. I've learnt you get to know someone 3 times. You have a preconception of what you think they're like. Then you have an initial interaction and think you've got an idea of who they are a bit better based on a few facts. Then the 3rd stage is where they completely baffle you in hilarious ways that you'd never have been able to guess at. The really beautiful thing about speaking to people is realising how friendly and welcoming the world is.
Peeling an onion is a great analogy I've had someone say to me. I can imagine some people would find the conversation starter Lewis used as a bit odd and they may well leave, but like you, I think it was a brilliant way to show vulnerability and open the conversation up straight away.
70-80% of communication isn't what you say. The state he was in was probably most important. The chance something like that happening, you being brave enough and be genuine ánd the other is willing to talk is small I think. The other willing to talk is maybe the easiest part in this. So, although I would say, try as you please, I don't think you can have this result as a side effect any minute on the day, and not several times per day. (When you start practising this) You could see this as beginner's luck. The next 10 times he would try to connect could all be terrible, but then experience will start working, the habit starts to grow and you'll become unconsciously competent which means it will become part of you. It's like forming a highway in your brain that's easy and quick to use. But the bravery he used is the opposite of fear, the ego. So he had let go of his ego I guess and that gives amazing results.
This is genuinely the best video I have ever watched. Ever. No cuts - just pure storytelling and sharing your beautiful journey. I can only thank you for being such a genuine human :)
hi mate, it has taken me 60 yrs to learn what you learnt back then, even today my son is embarrassed to go out with me because I talk (with) people, It took 30 years of an abusive marriage and a difficult workplace, before I discovered the truths of life, Now I am living the absolutely best life Buddhist Values (not the religion)are a constant guide to come back to if my mood starts to wander, No 1 Have a good heart, cheers mate, Like your thumbnail, that's what I clicked, I think it is your engaging face and position, cheers ....
Christianity starts with the idea we have a sin. You are getting forced to act good so you go to heaven. Buddhism starts with the idea you're fundamentally good, and you can express and cultivate that by being authentic. Be compassionate and bring loving kindness in ones life. No need to repent which is staying stuck in the past where you can't change anything. If you can forgive yourself you're there already, you won't need Jezus. But the idea of Jezus might help to forgive yourself because you thought you should have known and be better. Be as kind to yourself as you would be to a child of 2 months. Although you think you should have acted better, with the tools, knowledge and wisdom one has we continuingly Do the best we can. Just learn from the 'mistakes' you make by willing to be objective towards yourself.
My friend, this is only the second video I’ve watched from your channel, but it’s exactly what I needed at this time. Thank you for putting you stories and thoughts out there so authentically, I know I’m not the only one who will deeply appreciate it. Newly subscribed, and planning to follow your channel closely ❤️
First thought: Why is Peaky Blinders Smeagol being recommended to me? Last thought: Bless this beautiful shirtless chap for sharing his wonderful pearls of wisdom.
I don't think people realize how crucial this advice is. You and I are the same age, and I also went through experiences where a simple conversation opened up doors for me. I've found job opportunities, knowledge, friendship and spiritual enrichment, all through casual conversations with people I saw often. If I ever have kids, I'll teach them the value of humility, because being humble is literally the best way to be remembered by those around you. One simple question is a way to tell the other person that you're interested in their experience, and that's one of the best feelings ever. Not every conversation will be productive, but you'll always gain something in the end. There's only so much you can learn about life through your own eyes.
It doesn’t just take one conversation. It takes all the building blocks you had underneath that including being in tune with your feelings, able to articulate them, confident enough that your feelings would be met with a reasonable amount of kindness. Think of all the early experiences you had in childhood that taught you all these things. Not everyone has had that, so those of you listening to this and feeling despondent, it’s not your fault if you find it difficult to initiate.
Yes I agree, your comment makes me feel heard and valued, I definitely think that the barrier we have to cross to initiate the conversation is easier for some. Despite our learnt behaviours though I think we can aspire to be like the people who had it built for them in childhood and not let our weaknesses be an excuse. I do often get disheartened when trying to initiate conversations when I really want to, but physically I can't do it, even though I know it will make me feel happier and more fulfilled. But I do believe I'm getting better slowly with more consistent effort. We are all capable of growth and this was an inspiring story so it's much appreciated :)
I started wandering around alone in my early 30’s. Longing for connection, I started asking strangers if I could sit on their bench and visit for a bit. Most say yes and I’ve been privileged to some life altering conversations. I’m happy you’ve realized this at such a young age. ❤
I’m 22 and bought a one way ticket to Thailand and challenged myself to stay there for a couple of months. I feel this fire in my heart that calls me to travel the world. I’m scared but also excited and taking a leap of faith. I leave in a month
When I was 22, I traveled alone for five months in Southeast Asia. It was one of the most beautiful experiences I have had. You get to know so many people from all over the world and you see and experience so many beautiful things. I wish you good luck on your journey, you won't forget it and you'll always remember it.
I was very lonely in Vancouver BC after a month of travel. An old man from Saskatchewan asked to share a log I was sitting on. We spoke for 3 hours about how a brisk wind can kill in Saskatchewan, and how wasteful it is not to embrace your life. This gave me a new view on travel, and how useful a single conversation with a stranger can be. Connection and love is one kind gesture away.
You are very inspiring! I am an introvert and it's very hard for me to "initiate" conversations with strangers but if a conversation is started somehow I feel very comfortable talking to people. I just need someone to get me started....lol!
Think of what's holding you back. Fear of being awkward? If so, try to understand that there is no problem being awkward, you don't have to be perfect. Or simply don't care whether the other person likes you or not, even if it says no, don't feel bad, you don't have to please everybody, some people like you other don't, that's perfectly normal, don't seek for universal approval like if you have a perfectly logical opinion everybody shows agree. No Also,i don'tthink you are introvert, you only hold yourself back from being extrovert. Hope this helps.
I can sort of manage to get a conversation going if I'm like talking to a cashier or a customer (if im the cashier), but the idea of just going up to some stranger and saying hello is just completely impossible for me to envision. Its just such a foreign concept to me. This girl a few months ago that I on occasion sit near on my break while reading one day decided to say hello and introduce herself to me. I'd more or less noticed her a few times and the only thing I'd think was "ah, she must work around here too, interesting." Then I'd go back to my book and the idea of talking to her never even crossed my mind. Yet here she was saying hello to me. I was actually at a loss for words for a second or so before I managed to say hello back and introduce myself because it was just so shocking to me that someone had actually just talked to me out of the blue like that. The idea of something like that happening just didn't register in my brain till then. Every now and then if I run into her we'll say hello and have a short conversation before we need to get back to work or whatever but its just so crazy to me even now that she was able to just do something like that. I've been rambling so sorry about that lol, not great at organizing my thoughts. Also if you're wondering why I was so surprised by it, to me its like having a wall in front of me, right about head level. I can get past the wall if I were to jump, grab it, pull myself up and over, then hop down. A fairly simple process that is not an easy process. So I just don't bother hopping the wall, there's cool stuff on the other side, sure, but its not something I really *need*. Then one day while im near the wall I watch someone casually walk up and hop the fucking thing in a single motion like Michael Jordan on crack. Naturally it's not something I ever thought was necessarily *impossible*, but it sure as shit isn't something I'd ever thought I'd see happening before my very eyes.
I’m remembering something a good friend told me years ago. Talk to someone about the thing that EVERYONE is interested in: themselves, ask about their life, experiences, lessons etc.
I always ask people at the counter how they are doing today and they always smile, because most people never ask. Sometimes it leads to a longer conversation, but you'll be amazed what people will tell you if you just listen.
We have decades of (British) tourists filling up on psychedelics and having lifechanging experiences, but it just never gets old. Thanks for your story!
This emphasizes the power of connection and communication in transforming our lives. Whether it's a casual interaction, a chance encounter, or a deep conversation, you never know which dialogue might be the catalyst for a major shift. This video reminds us that being open, staying present, and engaging with others can open doors to opportunities we hadn’t even imagined. It’s a powerful lesson in the potential of every single interaction! 🤩
You're lovely. I have no idea why the algorithm made you show up in my feed, but I'm glad it did. You are well-spoken, have great story-telling skills that draw the listener in; you are engaging; listening to you is a pleasure - you don't use fillers. You are truly lovely.
I had an incredibly similar experience. I traveled alone to Amsterdam, took truffles (the strong ones), and took an immense inward dip. Coming out of quarantine, I was full of joy to meet new people and explore their inner worlds-- and I was shattered by their apathy, narcissism, and self-destructiveness. I chose to isolate myself in self-protection, and I wandered in hopes of not needing to turn back ever again. But I went home. I got professional help, mended my wounds, and turned my life around. You're 100% on the mark, and sometimes, open-heartedness can hurt, but it led to a completely different life, and a better one for it. More people need to hear your message, even if it means getting hurt to learn something new.
i've been isolating myself for the past few years, and it especially hurts now that I'm studying abroad in Spain this semester. I feel a sense of dissociation , like im not connected to anything around me. its not the new enviornment, as I am very used to constant change. its my first time in europe i should be very excited, yet i am so numb, not even anxious in the slightest. and idk what to do ! im only 19 so i guess i have time , but i did attend group counseling the past semester at my uni which i thought helped me. during the summer i got a new job so i tried to be gregarious and friendly. it worked ! made more connections with the people there than the job i had worked at for the past 4 years. i think it was the environment; everyone was older, working to live, and truly had some profound experiences. I could just be myself and i was able to meet some amazing people. now im in spain and i haven't been able to talk to really anyone and i am just going down my old spiral , after believing i was turnin my life around ! its not even the language barrier , i came here with 60 other u.s students through this affiliated program. I have 4 girl roommates who go out all the time and are all close , yet here i am stuck in my room! interacting with them is draining, as they all seem very superfical. i barely know spanish tho so i can't really go out and meet locals. I have talked to lots of the other us students, yet i can't seem to be the person i was over this summer. now I am extremely reticent and back to being very reserved, with a closed mind. but i am still trying to enjoy my time here and going to lots of places on my own. which i am okay with, since i've been the only person in my life for years. i apologize for typin this all out , clearly you can tell how lonely i am since i am willin to just overshare randomly.!! okay anyways, bye thanks. If you maybe have some advice I would love to hear
@@abbyheckler Man I've been there. It's always gonna be hard going out to talk to people, but even starting a conversation with somebody at the bus station is something. You'll never see them again, anyway. While you're there, go see great art. Plays, movies, concerts, anything. You'll get something out of your loneliness that'll make you feel alive. And soon you'll be back and you'll appreciate what you already had so much more.
Young people had to deal with weirdness of lockdowns and isolation. I don’t know what you’re studying there but you can’t go wrong with learning about the horses there or the many festivals. Look up The Artist’s Way- if you can’t find the books there, there are plenty of videos about it. A basic part is writing morning pages and going on “artist dates” solo- observing, experiencing, immersing. Best wishes to you. I’m still doing artist dates myself.
@@abbyheckleryou're making good choices to watch helpful videos. I'm an introvert and the superficial banter is draining. If I'm going to have a chat, I'm better with discussing something meaningful and of substance. It sounds like your roommates enjoy frivolous communication. That's rough, that's not something I could pretend to enjoy for long. My years in uni were very lonely, I understand.
i'm fifteen and i'm on a solo three month exchange to france, in a tiny town in the middle of nowhere, with two hundred people. this is only my second week here, and i want to tell you how much i relate to the desire to connect with people while overseas. i've gone on this exchange to learn the value of language and communication, and in the first week alone i'm already learning, and learning about the importance of loneliness too. your video has made me realize that the parts of life i so value are the experiences i share with other people. there are moments of awe in life that you have to experience alone definitely, but the ones which stand out most to me have been moments of sameness with other people. thank you so much for your video.
I agree with everything you are saying but unfortunately it can also be completely exhausting when you show interest in everyone around you but you soon find out not one person gives a toss about you in return
I dont think hes saying to show interest in everything around you, rather dont be afraid to pursue what you are interested in, or just do it even if its scary. I am not an extrovert but i have still had deep conversations with strangers and it fills you with meaning, hope and joy. Not always but it is common. On the other hand you are totally right, but you get a sense of who is open and willing to share that experience with you, some people are just in the daily cycle of stress, work, routine etc. They will not have time for you so just let it be like that. In the video he was talking about a man just sitting in a park being present, so its safe to assume he got time.
I currently work as a waiter/barkeeper in a small restaurant to overcome my social issues step by step. Being friendly and open in the context of work or a project was never a problem for me. But having a small talk with a customer outside of work context, even if just a few sentences gives me everytime a real emotional push that remains over the whole evening 🙂
So right. I found myself in various situations on a recent solo travelling trip where I could choose to start a conversation with someone or not, and I plucked up the courage to start those conversations and felt immensely better about it afterwards
This has been great to hear at this point in my life. I was obese all my life and kids at school and teachers and even people at my church said horribly mean things to me about my weight. At 22yo a injury caused me to loose over 130lbs and I have maintained my weight loss (I’m now 33) but I have noticed for over a decade now I have looked at people as evil, any meeting with a stranger was a chance of them hurting you terribly with words. Iv been trying to get over my trama.
I realized early on some sad truths about "humans",so I don't care what they do but I do care about what I do. I'm sorry people made fun of u cause of your weight...some people are really shallow and shallow waters r stepped by everyone, know that
I’m 19 and I’m headed to italy by myself to solo travel for the first time in a week, I can be shy and awkward and socially anxious at the best of times and having found this video at this time seems very inspiring and aligned to me. Thank you, peace & love to you (:
A week ago we were in Marbella and just as the party finished me and my friend went down to the beach, there was a guy (who actually kinda looked like you, i just realized) he didnt speak much english but i wanted to speak with him and invited him to sit next to us. Idk if we even talked cuz i was highly under influence of substances. He was chillin looking, gazing. But he had the best aura or idk. When i saw him leaving i stood up to shake his hands. And as we shook hands he smiled and "tapped his chest" and said something in spanish but i felt soo much more happy, and i wish i could talk with him about life. He seemed so chill and cool . Man i wouldve had so many questions for him
Wise words to live by, thank you. Don't be afraid of being the one to start a conversation. Don't self-censor yourself, be curious. Go out and meet new people!
around 3 months ago I was having anxiety attacks daily, lonely after getting dumbed and leaving a toxic friend group + the 1 year of therapy that took to recover from that. And, one lazy day I decided to go and message someone in a tabletop games channel and accept their invitation to play. The conversations were uncomfortable and I felt stupidity, but I accept the invitation for a private group and them started to hang out in the channel, mostly listening. I knew I would feel bad with myself if I talked at this point so I play shy. It's been 3 months now, as I said, I am now part of the group and even started dating someone I meet there. And, really, it took me lots of conversations on the first group, I talked with a lot of people I didn't like of clicked and I was going to give up by the point I saw a green flag on this person's post. Sometimes you are just a conversation away from a completely different live.
Always stick to the 3 S's when new to psychedelics. Set (mindset), Set (of friends), Setting (preferably in nature and not in public). Your first mistake was tripping alone and the loneliness was avoidable. Hope this helps someone. 😊
I watched this video yesterday in the evening and it fired up the need to connect again. Today in my lunch break I saw a colleauge I didn't met in a long time. I could have just said hello, since I had the inspiration from you, I stopped and just asked 'how are you?'. Nothing more. And she really appreciated the question. It was a really nice little conversation and we parted both with a smile on the face. It really is interesting how fast life changes from just one situation. ❤
Yes! Exactly. Due to going back to school and work, I got out of the habit of giving myself a real travel adventure. So nervous to be traveling alone, I had to just catch myself off guard one afternoon - and buy a ticket! Ireland. What the heck, it’s not like they even speak a different language! I live in Hollywood, love asking folks where they’re visiting from when I’m walking to the store, I have great conversations with strangers all the time! Humans are interesting…😊
I had this one converation with my mom during covid about if wanted to keep going to the same school and I said no, mostly because I had stopped talking to people over covid and thought it was too awkward to be in the same class as those people again but it ended up changing my life so much, I moved to multiple different countries, met soooo much of my extended family and found out a lot about the world and myself. Nowadays I'm back home going to a school incredibly close to where I live that I never thought I'd even be smart enough to visit this uni but now I'm there as a student! And I don't feel like Im forced to go into nursing, just "because that's what people with your background do" (my teacher in 2019 :/). A lot can change with one conversation and, for me, that conversation has me have a lot of low lows and very high up but at the end of the day Im happy in the place I'm at right now.
The psychedelic experience you had is one piece in the the emotional gear house of your inner emotional world. You were shown how some internal emotional programs are running in the background. So, similar to a dream, you were witness to how you operate in the world currently. You were shown your story and you could either embrace it or let it go, and start something new. That feeling of loneliness is always there and you remedy that by your motivation to connect with people. It wasn't that you were feeling lonely in that moment, but that somewhere inside you is always lonely. There is nothing wrong with that, we are humans and we crave connection. Without emotions to fuel our desire to move, who are we and where do we go?
I cried while watching this . . . so proud and impressed with you talking to that man and being truthful! Love your attitude and sense of adventure - and accountability! Thank you!
wow. I loved this story so much, as well as your commentary. I can relate so much to feeling alone, and feeling like it isn't "in me" to open up more socially. Or I try a little, but then I revert back to my old ways. It feels so good to talk to people and feel connected, but I still have trouble with it, even when I do it. It's hard for me to maintain eye contact while talking, but it feels so good to talk with someone. I used to practice talking with someone by talking to myself so often, and I'd always fantasize about being confident and connecting with people and living a fuller social life. Loneliness is harmful in so many ways, including physical. Not to get too dark, but it reminds me of an old man who ended his own life, leaving a note that said that the "loneliness got too large".
@@CreeperKiller420 then watch his videos called breath of life, and a way out of pain. Just pure brilliance. Then repeat til they become second nature. If U like them that it. I watched each over 150 times
@@markowen7416 Thank you. i have just finished that teaching. He is so good at speaking, engaging, funny, relatable. Sometimes he is a little creepy, but that's just his quirks, I don't like to judge, plus there is a lot about me that is accidentally strange and creepy, so it actually makes it easier to relate to him. I want to hear more from him.
5 minutes in. And your story is...exactly like every tripping story. Personal to you, dull to everyone else. I can't watch any further, but I'm encouraged to never repeat my own tripping stories.
People can be seen as undiscovered territory. Man, this is so true. I can be social if I want to, but for some reason something is holding me back if it isn't needed... You do you your thing, go on the same path everyday, you're bored, you think by yourself: is this it? Will take your advice and start seeing the people and events around my like opportunities again. Fuck man, great video. Thanks. Subscribed
Great story and a great message. This random video cheered me right up. We're just one random story away from a completely different mood. Thanks for sharing.
I'm a Swedish guy right now in the Philippines. I was actually here just last year, but this time I'm living on out in the countryside rather than the city, and so I am struggling with that exact same loneliness. I feel so extremely separated from the other people here other than other foreigners, so this really is exactly what I needed. Going to make use of it tomorrow
I came across this video in time of reflection and hard thinking, I’m 19 and I’ve always wanted to travel and I’m going to now, I think I’ve got a lot in common with you and I will continue to learn from you.
I started this video thinking I would skip through it and move on with my day. But they way you tell a story is so captivating I realises at the 10:00 mark that I'd sat and watched the whole thing without thinking about it, fully captivated. I smoked weed for the first time in my life the other week in France with one of my best friends. First night was fantastic, second night I went a little hard and we smoked the whole thing and I could feel 1000+ layers of my subconscious and I couldn't stop clearing my throat. I could still feel it the next day when we went to the shop to get food, I was standing in Lidl with no idea how to act normal, but it was nice because I realised no one cares. I mean I know that, but I don't think I'd put that knowledge into practice for a long time. Everyone is just trying to go about their day and doesn't really care what you do or how you act so long as you aren't screaming or trying to touch everyone. Segway, as I am writing this I just heard a little girl and her dad walking past, the girl was screaming about something and the dad just started mimicking her and screaming/crying as loud as he could and 1) that shit was hilarious, and 2) it highlights my above point, his world was walking beside him, he didn't care what others though, they are no concern to him and even though it was interesting to witness, I won't remember it all day.
I had this same revelation after feeling exactly the same, disconnected from the social world and then pushing myself past it. JUST ONE conversation is enough to open your mind l, your heart, or your eyes to what is out there for you.
born to late to explore the world, to early to explore the universe, born just in time to delve into other people's worldviews and see new perspectives on life
I've travelled alone, needing that loneliness, feeling sort of alienated from everything. Later those travels taught me what i feel i really am though, part of everything and everyone. Cheers man!
Growing up I had always wanted to be an adventurer or explorer. I think one of the most meaningful things I’ve ever realized came in part from this video. Knowing and meeting other people can satisfy that desire for me, for adventure and exploration.
You have a really great way with words which is inspiring - throughout lots of your videos I hear maybe a simple sentence which upon deeper reflection is extremely powerful and profound. Keep up the good work.
I love this idea. Executing it can be difficult for some of us. If one is sensitive, then when you attempt to talk to someone and they look at you like you are insane, it can have a strongly inhibitory effect on further attempts with others.
wow man I've had a similar experience and i can guarantee all it takes is just to reconnect with someone and carrying that enthusiasm with you no matter what, it sounds simple but it took me time to realize that.
Your experience reflects mine a whole lot - specifically in my case the "wow" moment was at a birthday party with MDMA, but the same concept. In turn I had to rediscover this when I started dating last year - where I have to actually APPROACH girls, TALK to them and INTEREST them. It required so much more than just remembering a few parlor tricks. Rather it demanded that I actually instill confidence and an inner belief that the other person is genuinely interested in talking to you and that if they don't - it is a reflection of either them or how you approached them, rather than something inherently wrong with me. The "side quest" metaphor is excellent as someone who loves RPGs :)
Really appreciating the threads of conversation here with each other, it is heartening to know that there are many genuine, articulate and kind young people out there in our big wide world. Love to you all 🙋♂️
Thanks so much. I'm so glad this turned things around in that experience. Facing my fears and making conversation with others from a place of curiosity has only resulted in further disappointment and feelings of isolation. The experience of rbeing vulnerable and inviting others to exchange connection has always arrived at a dead end and feelings of invisiblity and otherness, and yet I keep trying. I sure hope something clicks for me someday and I figure out what it is I am or am not doing. I appreciate the bright spot you shared.
There's a depth in your personality that feels very familiar in a way I can't really describe without sounding weird but I´m really thankful that you made this video. Your story is oddly similar to mine which is what made me interested from the beginning. I was 19 and my first solo trip was in Amsterdam as well about two years ago, I stayed with a host from couchsurfing and he gave me any possible psychedelic I wanted (I took the truffles as well) and it just changed my view on life and it changed the direction of my life completely. Your story is intriguing cause I had the exact same feelings when I took mushrooms. The feeling of loneliness and feeling excluded from the world. As if everyone were npc's who didn't care how I was feeling and that maybe going back home was the answer. So it makes me relate to you a lot and it feels good to know I wasn't alone in that feeling of loneliness. I'ts the first time I see a fellow human share this thought process and having this kind of emotional depth. Actually it's not just emotional depth, I would like to call it emotional familiarity. Although for me my life went in a very negative direction for a while due to the psychedelics but I've managed to make it positive again and now I have found a clear goal and path in life. And what you said is something I had discovered as well... how one conversation can literally change your whole life... but I still struggle with initiating conversations. So this video really hit me and made me feel almost like it was tailor made for me and your eyes were really speaking to my soul. (I hope I don't sound like some psycho stalker cause It's not my point at all. There's just something deep I feel on a human level which might be hard to describe without sounding like I'm tripping again or something). But once again thank you for making this video, it can really help someone in ways you can't imagine. This feels almost like a sign that I should pay more attention to the goal I once had of initiating conversations/connections and that I should focus more on people and talk to them cause maybe it could be the key point in my life that will change everything. Now, Sophie is not my real name, I just prefer to not put my real name on the internet, but just know that I'm a fellow human who really appreciates you and oddly recognizes your soul and I wish you the best wherever you are
Bahaha I did the same type of stuff when I was living and traveling across Europe, right down to the tripping outta my mind in Vondel Park and having a mystical experience with a man playing djembe drums by a bench. The ideology of light shines brightly in life, and the suns rays are a beautiful thing. I wish you peace and health brother and to continue weaving your conversations on life into the fabric of our universe. I recommend to you the poem, "Pangur Bán", it's quite lovely-and think you might find its closing line perhaps compelling, as I did; "I get wisdom day and night Turning darkness into light"
The Fun part is you are alone in this UNIVERSE. The eyes through which you see the experiences you have , its just yours. No one on this planet shares anything near to your experience. This is solipsistic universe.
While it's true that each person has a uniquely subjective experience, claiming that we are entirely alone in the universe overlooks the shared connections and interactions we have with others. Our experiences may be personal, but they are often enriched by our relationships and the collective human experience. Solipsism doesn't fully capture the complexity of reality and social existence.
Great storytelling! I was also alone on a backpacking trip in europe last month and i am 19. I were in Barcelona as my first destination, the first day it was raining and felt extreme uncomfort in being lonely the first two days. Then I felt like i had had enough of being sad and feeling lonely for two days so i went to an restaurant in the evening when the weather was better aswell. I spoke to a guy who was smoking a cigarette and asked for advice what to do in Barcelona. He were very engaged in the conversation and showed me places to go skateboarding (as i was planing on buying a board on the trip) and other advice which led to me having another great 5 days in Barcelona with loads of fun. I did also have the same thought as you with going back home before talking to this dude. This conversation gave me a great start to my trip and another 3 beautiful weeks in europe. You did really put my thoughts into words in this story since I had a very similar experience. I will take this sentence with me. "You are one conversation away from a completely different life" Thanks// Adam
I was homeless for most of my adult life. Sleeping under bridges, sleeping in shelters, panhandling or donating plasma for money, etc. it was hell. But I learned how to make it work, and one of the biggest things I'm realizing now that I'm doing better is that when you're homeless there are almost always people around, and you basically HAVE to improve your social skills or you will have problems. Now I'm off the streets, cut off most of my friends and family and just don't talk to anyone. I talk to myself or pray to God more than I talk to other people. Part of me wants to find people like me, and part of me doesn't want to have to worry about fake people / people who are a waste of my time.
"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it" Melvana Celaleddin Rumi
I feel you misunderstood. His courage in overcoming the fear he was feeling in order to HAVE that conversation is what led him to continue his journey. So yes, it was internal, but there is duality in all things.
I was in Amsterdam, September 2018, 30 years old. I was there during a business trip. We had a fantastic dinner and were enjoying a beer during a great late summer night. As suddenly, a young Brit took a seat next to us. He looked at us, asked us if we could help him to roll his cigarette, took a deep breath and puked all over the place. Relieved, he said that he feels much better now. And blacked out, slamming his head into the dishes on the table. A smart woman helping us find out he might need sugar as he seems to be diabetic. We sat him up, the restaurant gave him a red getorade and boom he was back. But he was forced to leave then. I wonder, what kind of story he might had to tell. We will never know.
This video honestly inspired me to start being more proactive with people. I always bottled up my emotions growing up (still do, working on it) and that really lead to some major loneliness on my end. I've finally started having actual conversations again. Honestly, I think I'll be thinking back on this story for years. Great video.
One day, late in life, I wrote a message to myself. A list of small things that I should do everyday. I carried that list in my pocket for a year. One of the best things I wrote on that list was speak to a stranger. After many years of social isolation my life began to change for the better. Now I have many new friends that I wouldn't have had if I hadn't made that list.
What else was on the list?
After stumbling upon amphetamine a few times, I did this to myself, as well as bombarding my friends with voice messages. I wish I was like this naturally.
Please let us know what else did you practice on everyday basis.
Everything that is NEW and DIFFERENT, so also writing about something (while knowing that is not you), changes the nervous system
please share the list!
Thank you random shirtless man who youtube recommended to me.
Right! 😂
Are there pants?
Thats hilariuos this is your first video watching Newel of knowledge because its so off key. hahaha.
@sleepingmelons8420 the algorithm works in strange ways I guess.
Facts, he's a good storyteller. I'm over hear cracking up.
Great storytelling skills, I was hooked throughout the entire video.
Awesome! Thanks for sharing this :)
@@NewelOfKnowledge it's true, i felt real anxiety when you were discussing your approach to the columbian man
@@NewelOfKnowledgeyou know you’ve just touched upon one of my greatest struggles and you’re setting me in a better way but dear god I wish I wasn’t autistic.
@@falcon5751 God or not you're exactly who you're meant to be. If there is a creator you're created as intended, if there is no creator you're still the amalgamation of everything before you, not being but forever becoming. I think that's perfect and so are you, perfectly imperfect like the rest of us.
same, this was the conversation.
this is the guy that everyone is lucky to have and be around.
🥲🥲🥲
This is the guy i want to be so everyone around me can feel better :)
Hes got a boat load of charisma
I only watched 1 video but hes the type of guy that I will listen to the whole day of talking about life and having the deepest conversation 24/7
That's one of the nicest compliments you can give a person.
This used to be the norm before we all got sucked into our phones. People had no choice but to communicate, and we were all curious about one another without a slot machine in our pockets to distract us. What you described is the key to connection which is vulnerability. Through your bravery, you discovered that vulnerability is like a muscle to be worked, with endless connections as the reward. Thank you for sharing!
That's so true, thank you.
who are you I wanna know you
You know what - not really. It was not at all common to just start conversations like this with people in a city like Amsterdam. The person in the video here was brave to just do it - it took him courage exactly because it was an uncommon thing to do and may be met with awkwardness or even hostility. You can still roll that dice and try it today if you wanted, I see people in the parks quite often just sitting there and relaxing - although yes of course there are a number just stuck into their phones.
Not where I'm from. Walking up to strangers and starting conversations has always been uncommon. Still always happens, but also always uncommon. Phones didn't change this that much I think.
@@thelazymanatee2506 It's just people romanticising the times before mobile phones - or using mobile phones for an excuse for their own current habits. "People had no choice but to communicate - we were all curious about one another" - lol in what world was this? People just walked past each other on the street as they do now.
You are an excellent story teller.
Thank you amigo! :)
Right? No filler words or fluff!
Love this! I think everyone needs to re-connect socially, and NOT on social media. Face to face contact and genuine expression, meaningful conversations. Learning about each other, heightening empathy and opening each other up to opportunities. More human. 👏
Amen! Thank you for commenting
Amen. Well said
Bless!
Yessss bang on
absolute facts
"I'm lonely - can I have a conversation with you?"
That's so beautiful and profound. Do you know how few people would say that?
Speaking with strangers is such a lovely experience. I've learnt you get to know someone 3 times. You have a preconception of what you think they're like. Then you have an initial interaction and think you've got an idea of who they are a bit better based on a few facts. Then the 3rd stage is where they completely baffle you in hilarious ways that you'd never have been able to guess at.
The really beautiful thing about speaking to people is realising how friendly and welcoming the world is.
Peeling an onion is a great analogy I've had someone say to me.
I can imagine some people would find the conversation starter Lewis used as a bit odd and they may well leave, but like you, I think it was a brilliant way to show vulnerability and open the conversation up straight away.
70-80% of communication isn't what you say. The state he was in was probably most important.
The chance something like that happening, you being brave enough and be genuine ánd the other is willing to talk is small I think. The other willing to talk is maybe the easiest part in this.
So, although I would say, try as you please, I don't think you can have this result as a side effect any minute on the day, and not several times per day. (When you start practising this)
You could see this as beginner's luck. The next 10 times he would try to connect could all be terrible, but then experience will start working, the habit starts to grow and you'll become unconsciously competent which means it will become part of you.
It's like forming a highway in your brain that's easy and quick to use.
But the bravery he used is the opposite of fear, the ego. So he had let go of his ego I guess and that gives amazing results.
This is genuinely the best video I have ever watched. Ever. No cuts - just pure storytelling and sharing your beautiful journey. I can only thank you for being such a genuine human :)
Thank you :) for taking the time to type this. And welcome!
Agree, it’s so pure and authentic, I felt like I was spending quality time with a good friend
hi mate, it has taken me 60 yrs to learn what you learnt back then, even today my son is embarrassed to go out with me because I talk (with) people, It took 30 years of an abusive marriage and a difficult workplace, before I discovered the truths of life, Now I am living the absolutely best life Buddhist Values (not the religion)are a constant guide to come back to if my mood starts to wander, No 1 Have a good heart, cheers mate, Like your thumbnail, that's what I clicked, I think it is your engaging face and position, cheers ....
Repent and follow Christ Jesus Sir he loves and died for you
@@Leonidovich_7 Christ would encourage them to follow whatever brings love and peace in their heart and soul. Not demanding, forcing or judging.
@@Leonidovich_7Repent what? We are meant to enjoy life, not live in misery.
@@Leonidovich_7 The bible is a fanfic bye 💀
Christianity starts with the idea we have a sin. You are getting forced to act good so you go to heaven.
Buddhism starts with the idea you're fundamentally good, and you can express and cultivate that by being authentic. Be compassionate and bring loving kindness in ones life. No need to repent which is staying stuck in the past where you can't change anything. If you can forgive yourself you're there already, you won't need Jezus. But the idea of Jezus might help to forgive yourself because you thought you should have known and be better.
Be as kind to yourself as you would be to a child of 2 months. Although you think you should have acted better, with the tools, knowledge and wisdom one has we continuingly Do the best we can.
Just learn from the 'mistakes' you make by willing to be objective towards yourself.
My friend, this is only the second video I’ve watched from your channel, but it’s exactly what I needed at this time. Thank you for putting you stories and thoughts out there so authentically, I know I’m not the only one who will deeply appreciate it.
Newly subscribed, and planning to follow your channel closely ❤️
Thank you for your kind words. It's a pleasure to have you here. :)
A reminder to "walk around like God sent you"
... god is not there or overthere to be "found" ... But allways on the INSIDE❤
Love that!
First thought: Why is Peaky Blinders Smeagol being recommended to me?
Last thought: Bless this beautiful shirtless chap for sharing his wonderful pearls of wisdom.
😭😭😭😭🤣
I got the peaky blinders vibe too. Also one day he was 18 and alone and the next day he woke up and was 40. Good story. 👍
I don't think people realize how crucial this advice is. You and I are the same age, and I also went through experiences where a simple conversation opened up doors for me. I've found job opportunities, knowledge, friendship and spiritual enrichment, all through casual conversations with people I saw often. If I ever have kids, I'll teach them the value of humility, because being humble is literally the best way to be remembered by those around you. One simple question is a way to tell the other person that you're interested in their experience, and that's one of the best feelings ever. Not every conversation will be productive, but you'll always gain something in the end. There's only so much you can learn about life through your own eyes.
'knock and the door will open' is so beautiful
Turns out I was just one monologue away from a completely different life.
“People are the ends and not the means” are the words that really stuck with me.
I love talking to strangers, it’s nice when people light up
It doesn’t just take one conversation. It takes all the building blocks you had underneath that including being in tune with your feelings, able to articulate them, confident enough that your feelings would be met with a reasonable amount of kindness. Think of all the early experiences you had in childhood that taught you all these things. Not everyone has had that, so those of you listening to this and feeling despondent, it’s not your fault if you find it difficult to initiate.
Yes I agree, your comment makes me feel heard and valued, I definitely think that the barrier we have to cross to initiate the conversation is easier for some. Despite our learnt behaviours though I think we can aspire to be like the people who had it built for them in childhood and not let our weaknesses be an excuse. I do often get disheartened when trying to initiate conversations when I really want to, but physically I can't do it, even though I know it will make me feel happier and more fulfilled. But I do believe I'm getting better slowly with more consistent effort. We are all capable of growth and this was an inspiring story so it's much appreciated :)
It’s not your fault, but it is your responsibility. There’s a fine line between accommodating and enabling.
I started wandering around alone in my early 30’s. Longing for connection, I started asking strangers if I could sit on their bench and visit for a bit. Most say yes and I’ve been privileged to some life altering conversations. I’m happy you’ve realized this at such a young age. ❤
I’m 22 and bought a one way ticket to Thailand and challenged myself to stay there for a couple of months. I feel this fire in my heart that calls me to travel the world. I’m scared but also excited and taking a leap of faith. I leave in a month
Say yes to everything. Apart from drugs. All the best!
Would be awesome if you replied back here in a few months to see your progress! Stay safe out there!
When I was 22, I traveled alone for five months in Southeast Asia. It was one of the most beautiful experiences I have had. You get to know so many people from all over the world and you see and experience so many beautiful things. I wish you good luck on your journey, you won't forget it and you'll always remember it.
May your journey be blessed!
Please move to other countries as well
Thailand felt so wasted....mass tourism i guess
I was very lonely in Vancouver BC after a month of travel. An old man from Saskatchewan asked to share a log I was sitting on. We spoke for 3 hours about how a brisk wind can kill in Saskatchewan, and how wasteful it is not to embrace your life. This gave me a new view on travel, and how useful a single conversation with a stranger can be. Connection and love is one kind gesture away.
You are very inspiring! I am an introvert and it's very hard for me to "initiate" conversations with strangers but if a conversation is started somehow I feel very comfortable talking to people. I just need someone to get me started....lol!
I know the feeling. The last shorts I uploaded has a few tips if you’re interested. As initiating conversations is an awesome skill to practice!
Think of what's holding you back. Fear of being awkward? If so, try to understand that there is no problem being awkward, you don't have to be perfect. Or simply don't care whether the other person likes you or not, even if it says no, don't feel bad, you don't have to please everybody, some people like you other don't, that's perfectly normal, don't seek for universal approval like if you have a perfectly logical opinion everybody shows agree. No
Also,i don'tthink you are introvert, you only hold yourself back from being extrovert. Hope this helps.
I can sort of manage to get a conversation going if I'm like talking to a cashier or a customer (if im the cashier), but the idea of just going up to some stranger and saying hello is just completely impossible for me to envision. Its just such a foreign concept to me.
This girl a few months ago that I on occasion sit near on my break while reading one day decided to say hello and introduce herself to me. I'd more or less noticed her a few times and the only thing I'd think was "ah, she must work around here too, interesting." Then I'd go back to my book and the idea of talking to her never even crossed my mind. Yet here she was saying hello to me. I was actually at a loss for words for a second or so before I managed to say hello back and introduce myself because it was just so shocking to me that someone had actually just talked to me out of the blue like that. The idea of something like that happening just didn't register in my brain till then.
Every now and then if I run into her we'll say hello and have a short conversation before we need to get back to work or whatever but its just so crazy to me even now that she was able to just do something like that.
I've been rambling so sorry about that lol, not great at organizing my thoughts.
Also if you're wondering why I was so surprised by it, to me its like having a wall in front of me, right about head level. I can get past the wall if I were to jump, grab it, pull myself up and over, then hop down. A fairly simple process that is not an easy process. So I just don't bother hopping the wall, there's cool stuff on the other side, sure, but its not something I really *need*.
Then one day while im near the wall I watch someone casually walk up and hop the fucking thing in a single motion like Michael Jordan on crack. Naturally it's not something I ever thought was necessarily *impossible*, but it sure as shit isn't something I'd ever thought I'd see happening before my very eyes.
You simply need to check on how to break the ice... rest you will make a victory ✌ 🎉😊
Fear of rejection. Once they start talking back, it is them accepting you.
There's a world inside everyone to be explored and experienced. The biggest asset on anything is the human being.
I’m remembering something a good friend told me years ago. Talk to someone about the thing that EVERYONE is interested in: themselves, ask about their life, experiences, lessons etc.
I always ask people at the counter how they are doing today and they always smile, because most people never ask. Sometimes it leads to a longer conversation, but you'll be amazed what people will tell you if you just listen.
We have decades of (British) tourists filling up on psychedelics and having lifechanging experiences, but it just never gets old. Thanks for your story!
This emphasizes the power of connection and communication in transforming our lives. Whether it's a casual interaction, a chance encounter, or a deep conversation, you never know which dialogue might be the catalyst for a major shift. This video reminds us that being open, staying present, and engaging with others can open doors to opportunities we hadn’t even imagined. It’s a powerful lesson in the potential of every single interaction! 🤩
I love the idea that you’re a spirit guide just living in the rocks, waiting to pop up and offer life changing advice
"I'm a bit lonely, can we have a conversation?"
I love this - nice one! 😊
You're lovely. I have no idea why the algorithm made you show up in my feed, but I'm glad it did. You are well-spoken, have great story-telling skills that draw the listener in; you are engaging; listening to you is a pleasure - you don't use fillers. You are truly lovely.
🥲🫶
I had an incredibly similar experience. I traveled alone to Amsterdam, took truffles (the strong ones), and took an immense inward dip. Coming out of quarantine, I was full of joy to meet new people and explore their inner worlds-- and I was shattered by their apathy, narcissism, and self-destructiveness.
I chose to isolate myself in self-protection, and I wandered in hopes of not needing to turn back ever again.
But I went home. I got professional help, mended my wounds, and turned my life around. You're 100% on the mark, and sometimes, open-heartedness can hurt, but it led to a completely different life, and a better one for it. More people need to hear your message, even if it means getting hurt to learn something new.
i've been isolating myself for the past few years, and it especially hurts now that I'm studying abroad in Spain this semester. I feel a sense of dissociation , like im not connected to anything around me. its not the new enviornment, as I am very used to constant change. its my first time in europe i should be very excited, yet i am so numb, not even anxious in the slightest. and idk what to do ! im only 19 so i guess i have time , but i did attend group counseling the past semester at my uni which i thought helped me. during the summer i got a new job so i tried to be gregarious and friendly. it worked ! made more connections with the people there than the job i had worked at for the past 4 years. i think it was the environment; everyone was older, working to live, and truly had some profound experiences. I could just be myself and i was able to meet some amazing people. now im in spain and i haven't been able to talk to really anyone and i am just going down my old spiral , after believing i was turnin my life around ! its not even the language barrier , i came here with 60 other u.s students through this affiliated program. I have 4 girl roommates who go out all the time and are all close , yet here i am stuck in my room! interacting with them is draining, as they all seem very superfical. i barely know spanish tho so i can't really go out and meet locals. I have talked to lots of the other us students, yet i can't seem to be the person i was over this summer. now I am extremely reticent and back to being very reserved, with a closed mind. but i am still trying to enjoy my time here and going to lots of places on my own. which i am okay with, since i've been the only person in my life for years. i apologize for typin this all out , clearly you can tell how lonely i am since i am willin to just overshare randomly.!! okay anyways, bye thanks. If you maybe have some advice I would love to hear
@@abbyheckler Man I've been there. It's always gonna be hard going out to talk to people, but even starting a conversation with somebody at the bus station is something. You'll never see them again, anyway. While you're there, go see great art. Plays, movies, concerts, anything. You'll get something out of your loneliness that'll make you feel alive. And soon you'll be back and you'll appreciate what you already had so much more.
Young people had to deal with weirdness of lockdowns and isolation.
I don’t know what you’re studying there but you can’t go wrong with learning about the horses there or the many festivals. Look up The Artist’s Way- if you can’t find the books there, there are plenty of videos about it. A basic part is writing morning pages and going on “artist dates” solo- observing, experiencing, immersing.
Best wishes to you.
I’m still doing artist dates myself.
@@abbyheckleryou're making good choices to watch helpful videos. I'm an introvert and the superficial banter is draining. If I'm going to have a chat, I'm better with discussing something meaningful and of substance. It sounds like your roommates enjoy frivolous communication. That's rough, that's not something I could pretend to enjoy for long. My years in uni were very lonely, I understand.
i'm fifteen and i'm on a solo three month exchange to france, in a tiny town in the middle of nowhere, with two hundred people. this is only my second week here, and i want to tell you how much i relate to the desire to connect with people while overseas. i've gone on this exchange to learn the value of language and communication, and in the first week alone i'm already learning, and learning about the importance of loneliness too. your video has made me realize that the parts of life i so value are the experiences i share with other people. there are moments of awe in life that you have to experience alone definitely, but the ones which stand out most to me have been moments of sameness with other people. thank you so much for your video.
Beth, you are a ray of light in the world. Go share it with others. Have a great time in France.
What a marvelous chance to have. Drink it in to the lees.
“Go first, go positive, & being constant in doing it” I’m holding onto this one. Currently at a crossroads and this is helping
In a superficial world a conversation really does open the door to a person's life
the hero of the story is the man who welcomed a stranger and gave hours of his time to connect with someone in need…
Truly. Had he not entertained him, the story would be sad one with defeat at its core.
I think i've had moments similar to that in life... it's such a beautiful connection to make with a complete stranger
It’s wonderful that you were able to heal the feeling of alienation which probably already existed in you from childhood. Love and peace.
I agree with everything you are saying but unfortunately it can also be completely exhausting when you show interest in everyone around you but you soon find out not one person gives a toss about you in return
I will give the toss.
@cooganbeggs4942 - most people would give a toss if approached by someone as beautiful as this man. That's how shallow the world is, unfortunately.
I dont think hes saying to show interest in everything around you, rather dont be afraid to pursue what you are interested in, or just do it even if its scary.
I am not an extrovert but i have still had deep conversations with strangers and it fills you with meaning, hope and joy. Not always but it is common.
On the other hand you are totally right, but you get a sense of who is open and willing to share that experience with you, some people are just in the daily cycle of stress, work, routine etc. They will not have time for you so just let it be like that. In the video he was talking about a man just sitting in a park being present, so its safe to assume he got time.
You are not alone, even in thinking that. My journey is similar so I just keep trying. It's their loss.
I'm now subscribed to your channel because I give a toss.
I currently work as a waiter/barkeeper in a small restaurant to overcome my social issues step by step.
Being friendly and open in the context of work or a project was never a problem for me.
But having a small talk with a customer outside of work context, even if just a few sentences gives me everytime a real emotional push that remains over the whole evening 🙂
Good for you well done.
So right. I found myself in various situations on a recent solo travelling trip where I could choose to start a conversation with someone or not, and I plucked up the courage to start those conversations and felt immensely better about it afterwards
I almost cried. I love this story so much! Real human connection is what brings us together
6:53 This line made me release tears. Thank you so much for being an inspiration! I am grateful for this redirection.
How a simple "yes, of course" also means solidarity.
I can relate so much to the go first. Thank you for sharing your wonderful experience 🙏🏽
This has been great to hear at this point in my life. I was obese all my life and kids at school and teachers and even people at my church said horribly mean things to me about my weight. At 22yo a injury caused me to loose over 130lbs and I have maintained my weight loss (I’m now 33) but I have noticed for over a decade now I have looked at people as evil, any meeting with a stranger was a chance of them hurting you terribly with words. Iv been trying to get over my trama.
Smile breathe Don’t beat yourself 😊
I realized early on some sad truths about "humans",so I don't care what they do but I do care about what I do. I'm sorry people made fun of u cause of your weight...some people are really shallow and shallow waters r stepped by everyone, know that
That Colombian man 100% was meant to be there for you, what perfect timing
I’m 19 and I’m headed to italy by myself to solo travel for the first time in a week, I can be shy and awkward and socially anxious at the best of times and having found this video at this time seems very inspiring and aligned to me. Thank you, peace & love to you (:
A week ago we were in Marbella and just as the party finished me and my friend went down to the beach, there was a guy (who actually kinda looked like you, i just realized) he didnt speak much english but i wanted to speak with him and invited him to sit next to us. Idk if we even talked cuz i was highly under influence of substances. He was chillin looking, gazing. But he had the best aura or idk. When i saw him leaving i stood up to shake his hands. And as we shook hands he smiled and "tapped his chest" and said something in spanish but i felt soo much more happy, and i wish i could talk with him about life. He seemed so chill and cool . Man i wouldve had so many questions for him
Yep that’s the drugs working just fine
@@imonlytellingthetruth6562 lmfaooo
Can we all give an applause for this man. Fukin legend
Go first, go positive and and be constant in doing it. Wrote it on a post-it tacked it on my door, will live by it. Thanks for sharing, good sir.
I love this for you man. Much love to everything, and everyone. No one is perfect and we are all one family.
Wise words to live by, thank you. Don't be afraid of being the one to start a conversation. Don't self-censor yourself, be curious. Go out and meet new people!
around 3 months ago I was having anxiety attacks daily, lonely after getting dumbed and leaving a toxic friend group + the 1 year of therapy that took to recover from that. And, one lazy day I decided to go and message someone in a tabletop games channel and accept their invitation to play. The conversations were uncomfortable and I felt stupidity, but I accept the invitation for a private group and them started to hang out in the channel, mostly listening. I knew I would feel bad with myself if I talked at this point so I play shy. It's been 3 months now, as I said, I am now part of the group and even started dating someone I meet there. And, really, it took me lots of conversations on the first group, I talked with a lot of people I didn't like of clicked and I was going to give up by the point I saw a green flag on this person's post. Sometimes you are just a conversation away from a completely different live.
Always stick to the 3 S's when new to psychedelics. Set (mindset), Set (of friends), Setting (preferably in nature and not in public). Your first mistake was tripping alone and the loneliness was avoidable. Hope this helps someone. 😊
Definitely good to prepare. And I always choose a natural setting.
6:57 and maybe, just maybe, a little bit of mushrooms
I watched this video yesterday in the evening and it fired up the need to connect again. Today in my lunch break I saw a colleauge I didn't met in a long time. I could have just said hello, since I had the inspiration from you, I stopped and just asked 'how are you?'. Nothing more. And she really appreciated the question. It was a really nice little conversation and we parted both with a smile on the face.
It really is interesting how fast life changes from just one situation. ❤
Yes! Exactly. Due to going back to school and work, I got out of the habit of giving myself a real travel adventure. So nervous to be traveling alone, I had to just catch myself off guard one afternoon - and buy a ticket! Ireland. What the heck, it’s not like they even speak a different language! I live in Hollywood, love asking folks where they’re visiting from when I’m walking to the store, I have great conversations with strangers all the time! Humans are interesting…😊
I had this one converation with my mom during covid about if wanted to keep going to the same school and I said no, mostly because I had stopped talking to people over covid and thought it was too awkward to be in the same class as those people again but it ended up changing my life so much, I moved to multiple different countries, met soooo much of my extended family and found out a lot about the world and myself. Nowadays I'm back home going to a school incredibly close to where I live that I never thought I'd even be smart enough to visit this uni but now I'm there as a student! And I don't feel like Im forced to go into nursing, just "because that's what people with your background do" (my teacher in 2019 :/). A lot can change with one conversation and, for me, that conversation has me have a lot of low lows and very high up but at the end of the day Im happy in the place I'm at right now.
The psychedelic experience you had is one piece in the the emotional gear house of your inner emotional world. You were shown how some internal emotional programs are running in the background. So, similar to a dream, you were witness to how you operate in the world currently. You were shown your story and you could either embrace it or let it go, and start something new. That feeling of loneliness is always there and you remedy that by your motivation to connect with people. It wasn't that you were feeling lonely in that moment, but that somewhere inside you is always lonely. There is nothing wrong with that, we are humans and we crave connection. Without emotions to fuel our desire to move, who are we and where do we go?
This is why I've yet to take psychedelics, emotionally I'm a wreck idk if my brain will handle what its shown
@@madeabstractComing from experience, you'll become more aware of yourself and others but to actually make a difference is completely up to you.
So sweet.
The honesty of meeting someone and why you wanted to talk. To connect.
Self acceptance.
"Untold want,
by life and land never granted.
Now Voyager;
Sail thou forth, to seek and find."
-Walt Whitman
Brilliant quote. Thanks for sharing. If it's a verse from a poem would you mind sharing its name/title?
@@moryveraval6249the untold want
The Untold Want- by Walt Whitman.
I grew up near his home.
The poem is part of the cluster “Songs of Parting”.
@@LilyGazou - Thank you. Much appreciated. :)
I cried while watching this . . . so proud and impressed with you talking to that man and being truthful! Love your attitude and sense of adventure - and accountability! Thank you!
wow. I loved this story so much, as well as your commentary. I can relate so much to feeling alone, and feeling like it isn't "in me" to open up more socially. Or I try a little, but then I revert back to my old ways. It feels so good to talk to people and feel connected, but I still have trouble with it, even when I do it. It's hard for me to maintain eye contact while talking, but it feels so good to talk with someone. I used to practice talking with someone by talking to myself so often, and I'd always fantasize about being confident and connecting with people and living a fuller social life. Loneliness is harmful in so many ways, including physical. Not to get too dark, but it reminds me of an old man who ended his own life, leaving a note that said that the "loneliness got too large".
Thank you... Please listen to Matt kahn- the end of victimhood .. it may change your life as it did mine
@@markowen7416 thank you, I will
@@CreeperKiller420 then watch his videos called breath of life, and a way out of pain. Just pure brilliance. Then repeat til they become second nature. If U like them that it. I watched each over 150 times
@@markowen7416 Thank you. i have just finished that teaching. He is so good at speaking, engaging, funny, relatable. Sometimes he is a little creepy, but that's just his quirks, I don't like to judge, plus there is a lot about me that is accidentally strange and creepy, so it actually makes it easier to relate to him. I want to hear more from him.
@@CreeperKiller420 so glad you enjoyed it.. try this one... Matt kahn- energy update ascension 2015
5 minutes in. And your story is...exactly like every tripping story. Personal to you, dull to everyone else.
I can't watch any further, but I'm encouraged to never repeat my own tripping stories.
People can be seen as undiscovered territory. Man, this is so true. I can be social if I want to, but for some reason something is holding me back if it isn't needed... You do you your thing, go on the same path everyday, you're bored, you think by yourself: is this it?
Will take your advice and start seeing the people and events around my like opportunities again. Fuck man, great video. Thanks. Subscribed
Great story and a great message. This random video cheered me right up. We're just one random story away from a completely different mood. Thanks for sharing.
I'm a Swedish guy right now in the Philippines. I was actually here just last year, but this time I'm living on out in the countryside rather than the city, and so I am struggling with that exact same loneliness. I feel so extremely separated from the other people here other than other foreigners, so this really is exactly what I needed. Going to make use of it tomorrow
I came across this video in time of reflection and hard thinking, I’m 19 and I’ve always wanted to travel and I’m going to now, I think I’ve got a lot in common with you and I will continue to learn from you.
In your life, don't be put off by the negative that live among us.
"People are not a means to an end." True gold.
The algorithm dropped this guy from the 1890's into my feed....nice!
Guys with dreadlocks are always very open and chill. At least this is what I think about them
Not all of them ;)
Not in the US 😂
Then there's drexel😂
Not every Rasta is dread; not every dread is a Rasta.
@@aug5771Yeah always avoid places with dreadlocks and corn rows in America
I started this video thinking I would skip through it and move on with my day. But they way you tell a story is so captivating I realises at the 10:00 mark that I'd sat and watched the whole thing without thinking about it, fully captivated.
I smoked weed for the first time in my life the other week in France with one of my best friends. First night was fantastic, second night I went a little hard and we smoked the whole thing and I could feel 1000+ layers of my subconscious and I couldn't stop clearing my throat. I could still feel it the next day when we went to the shop to get food, I was standing in Lidl with no idea how to act normal, but it was nice because I realised no one cares. I mean I know that, but I don't think I'd put that knowledge into practice for a long time. Everyone is just trying to go about their day and doesn't really care what you do or how you act so long as you aren't screaming or trying to touch everyone.
Segway, as I am writing this I just heard a little girl and her dad walking past, the girl was screaming about something and the dad just started mimicking her and screaming/crying as loud as he could and 1) that shit was hilarious, and 2) it highlights my above point, his world was walking beside him, he didn't care what others though, they are no concern to him and even though it was interesting to witness, I won't remember it all day.
I went to Amsterdam on my own in the early 90s for 6 months, ended up there 10 years. I took everything btw 🤣
I had this same revelation after feeling exactly the same, disconnected from the social world and then pushing myself past it. JUST ONE conversation is enough to open your mind l, your heart, or your eyes to what is out there for you.
born to late to explore the world, to early to explore the universe, born just in time to delve into other people's worldviews and see new perspectives on life
Real
I've travelled alone, needing that loneliness, feeling sort of alienated from everything. Later those travels taught me what i feel i really am though, part of everything and everyone. Cheers man!
What a nice video! I’m 66 and I agree with what you’ve just said . Be brave and talk to people . Connections are more important than you think .
Growing up I had always wanted to be an adventurer or explorer. I think one of the most meaningful things I’ve ever realized came in part from this video.
Knowing and meeting other people can satisfy that desire for me, for adventure and exploration.
You have a really great way with words which is inspiring - throughout lots of your videos I hear maybe a simple sentence which upon deeper reflection is extremely powerful and profound. Keep up the good work.
Yeah, the 'people are the end not the means' part is something I never realized could even be a belief that one can hold.
I love this idea. Executing it can be difficult for some of us. If one is sensitive, then when you attempt to talk to someone and they look at you like you are insane, it can have a strongly inhibitory effect on further attempts with others.
its hard to depend on the responses of others to find happiness. its been too unpredictable for me to find consistent joy in
Thank you for taking away so much of the fear of talking to strangers. You're awesome!
Nice great to hear your story. I had that experience in 1959 and I still love it. Wellcome to the real world.
wow man I've had a similar experience and i can guarantee all it takes is just to reconnect with someone and carrying that enthusiasm with you no matter what, it sounds simple but it took me time to realize that.
Your experience reflects mine a whole lot - specifically in my case the "wow" moment was at a birthday party with MDMA, but the same concept.
In turn I had to rediscover this when I started dating last year - where I have to actually APPROACH girls, TALK to them and INTEREST them.
It required so much more than just remembering a few parlor tricks. Rather it demanded that I actually instill confidence and an inner belief that the other person is genuinely interested in talking to you and that if they don't - it is a reflection of either them or how you approached them, rather than something inherently wrong with me.
The "side quest" metaphor is excellent as someone who loves RPGs :)
Really appreciating the threads of conversation here with each other, it is heartening to know that there are many genuine, articulate and kind young people out there in our big wide world. Love to you all 🙋♂️
Thanks so much. I'm so glad this turned things around in that experience.
Facing my fears and making conversation with others from a place of curiosity has only resulted in further disappointment and feelings of isolation. The experience of rbeing vulnerable and inviting others to exchange connection has always arrived at a dead end and feelings of invisiblity and otherness, and yet I keep trying. I sure hope something clicks for me someday and I figure out what it is I am or am not doing. I appreciate the bright spot you shared.
There's a depth in your personality that feels very familiar in a way I can't really describe without sounding weird but I´m really thankful that you made this video.
Your story is oddly similar to mine which is what made me interested from the beginning. I was 19 and my first solo trip was in Amsterdam as well about two years ago, I stayed with a host from couchsurfing and he gave me any possible psychedelic I wanted (I took the truffles as well) and it just changed my view on life and it changed the direction of my life completely.
Your story is intriguing cause I had the exact same feelings when I took mushrooms. The feeling of loneliness and feeling excluded from the world. As if everyone were npc's who didn't care how I was feeling and that maybe going back home was the answer.
So it makes me relate to you a lot and it feels good to know I wasn't alone in that feeling of loneliness. I'ts the first time I see a fellow human share this thought process and having this kind of emotional depth. Actually it's not just emotional depth, I would like to call it emotional familiarity.
Although for me my life went in a very negative direction for a while due to the psychedelics but I've managed to make it positive again and now I have found a clear goal and path in life.
And what you said is something I had discovered as well... how one conversation can literally change your whole life... but I still struggle with initiating conversations. So this video really hit me and made me feel almost like it was tailor made for me and your eyes were really speaking to my soul. (I hope I don't sound like some psycho stalker cause It's not my point at all. There's just something deep I feel on a human level which might be hard to describe without sounding like I'm tripping again or something).
But once again thank you for making this video, it can really help someone in ways you can't imagine.
This feels almost like a sign that I should pay more attention to the goal I once had of initiating conversations/connections and that I should focus more on people and talk to them cause maybe it could be the key point in my life that will change everything.
Now, Sophie is not my real name, I just prefer to not put my real name on the internet, but just know that I'm a fellow human who really appreciates you and oddly recognizes your soul and I wish you the best wherever you are
I do appreciate a good story. Thank you.
Thank you sir!
@@NewelOfKnowledge No problem, keep up the good work!
Bahaha I did the same type of stuff when I was living and traveling across Europe, right down to the tripping outta my mind in Vondel Park and having a mystical experience with a man playing djembe drums by a bench. The ideology of light shines brightly in life, and the suns rays are a beautiful thing. I wish you peace and health brother and to continue weaving your conversations on life into the fabric of our universe.
I recommend to you the poem, "Pangur Bán", it's quite lovely-and think you might find its closing line perhaps compelling, as I did;
"I get wisdom day and night
Turning darkness into light"
The Fun part is you are alone in this UNIVERSE. The eyes through which you see the experiences you have , its just yours. No one on this planet shares anything near to your experience. This is solipsistic universe.
While it's true that each person has a uniquely subjective experience, claiming that we are entirely alone in the universe overlooks the shared connections and interactions we have with others. Our experiences may be personal, but they are often enriched by our relationships and the collective human experience. Solipsism doesn't fully capture the complexity of reality and social existence.
Great storytelling! I was also alone on a backpacking trip in europe last month and i am 19. I were in Barcelona as my first destination, the first day it was raining and felt extreme uncomfort in being lonely the first two days. Then I felt like i had had enough of being sad and feeling lonely for two days so i went to an restaurant in the evening when the weather was better aswell. I spoke to a guy who was smoking a cigarette and asked for advice what to do in Barcelona. He were very engaged in the conversation and showed me places to go skateboarding (as i was planing on buying a board on the trip) and other advice which led to me having another great 5 days in Barcelona with loads of fun. I did also have the same thought as you with going back home before talking to this dude. This conversation gave me a great start to my trip and another 3 beautiful weeks in europe. You did really put my thoughts into words in this story since I had a very similar experience. I will take this sentence with me. "You are one conversation away from a completely different life" Thanks// Adam
I was homeless for most of my adult life. Sleeping under bridges, sleeping in shelters, panhandling or donating plasma for money, etc. it was hell. But I learned how to make it work, and one of the biggest things I'm realizing now that I'm doing better is that when you're homeless there are almost always people around, and you basically HAVE to improve your social skills or you will have problems. Now I'm off the streets, cut off most of my friends and family and just don't talk to anyone. I talk to myself or pray to God more than I talk to other people. Part of me wants to find people like me, and part of me doesn't want to have to worry about fake people / people who are a waste of my time.
Title is totally true if that one conversation is the one where you get told your diagnosis. That sure as heck changes your life completely.
Hey man. This is the real thing. Bless ya.
"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it"
Melvana Celaleddin Rumi
If the man said F off you would continue with your journey. The path is inside us. Never outside.
I love the idea that he was so high he hallucinated the Colombian man lmao
I agree, sometimes conversations change our day or even life. A good trip, Amsterdam is a fun place to be young and exploratory.
I feel you misunderstood. His courage in overcoming the fear he was feeling in order to HAVE that conversation is what led him to continue his journey. So yes, it was internal, but there is duality in all things.
This is so very true! In life we are aligned with a multitude of unlikely characters who help keep us on the trajectory that is our intended life.
I was in Amsterdam, September 2018, 30 years old. I was there during a business trip. We had a fantastic dinner and were enjoying a beer during a great late summer night. As suddenly, a young Brit took a seat next to us. He looked at us, asked us if we could help him to roll his cigarette, took a deep breath and puked all over the place. Relieved, he said that he feels much better now. And blacked out, slamming his head into the dishes on the table. A smart woman helping us find out he might need sugar as he seems to be diabetic. We sat him up, the restaurant gave him a red getorade and boom he was back. But he was forced to leave then. I wonder, what kind of story he might had to tell. We will never know.
His story probably would’ve been that he drank 15 pints of lager before meeting you.
His story would probably be that he had 15 pints of lager before meeting you.
This video honestly inspired me to start being more proactive with people.
I always bottled up my emotions growing up (still do, working on it) and that really lead to some major loneliness on my end.
I've finally started having actual conversations again.
Honestly, I think I'll be thinking back on this story for years.
Great video.