I plead guilty..... I did the coffee making thing, with instant coffee...., burning my hands in the proceedings. But not in slow-mo, my cheap-ass DSLR doesn't have usable slow-mo.
@@marcelvanbodegom yeah guilty of the coffee test shoots as well. And don't worry I paid out for a c100 back then, and even that didn't have good slow mo either lol.
People who live near that park - "Hello, Police ? Yes, it's him again. He's in the park doing strange things and then he started filming our garbage. Please come quickly".
BINGO! It's style over substance. There is nothing wrong with wanting a certain look and style to HELP with the story, but if all you have is a look and try to build a story around it, you will always fail. As grandma would say about some men she has known, "All sizzle but no steak".
If you are going to talk plagues on YT, what about the freakin thumbnails where people have their mouths open like they are getting their tonsils examined?
I did to, but the difference is if you call it cinematic or not. I never called it cinematic. Than it's okay. He doesn't criticise those videos in itself. He criticises the fact that they all call them cinematic. 3 videos I did, beautiful shots. Not once I used the word cinematic.
Finally someone said it. The “cinematic” garbage on YT is unreal: you need ugly 2 tone only orange and teal color, slow mo on somebody’s feet, add some drone footage, make the image really blurry and noisy, get flare in the background, bokeh the shit out of it, and they think they are cinema. They are just losers.
I like how the music changes when you say "the cinema is in your heart" and its the "we learned something and the show is about over" music. That's so...cinematic. Also using the same music in all your videos works well for you.
What's actually more annoying is when you look for a tutorial on YT, half of the time, in the middle of the video people start talking about the Squarespace website... it's so annoying and everyone has the same script to say, I am watching the video for the cinematic tutorial, not website creation...
@@UNLouise But at least they could customize their scripts, make more variations or maybe let youtube creators - who are believed to be CREATIVE people - to be involved in the script? To make it suit their content? For example, Alt Shift X is master at smoothly transitioning from whatever he is talking about to advertisement and it is so good you don't think about skipping it at all. In most cases I skip the ad, because it's just the same boring script over and over again.
This dude nailed many of the things that annoy me on the videography side of youtube. Many people with cameras, almost none of them with actual stories to tell. Do I really want to know how amazing some dudes trip to Bali or Thailand was? Do I really want to see how gorgeous the plants they found on their morning stroll through the park look like? Your attractive good looking girlfriend dancing or running with her arms wide open while you pan around her with a camera on a gimbal looks good, but its as shallow as a puddle. I've only seen some guys make really insteresting videos using these techniques, but they are extremely rare. I only know how bland this style is because, after doing it myself for some time, its quite clear how quickly the formula stops working.
I've got inspired by the first youtube 'cinematic' videos I've watched, went down the rabbithole, watched about 20 of them and came to the same conclusion. No substance, no story, no meaning. It became so boring watching these.
What you bring to us is pure magic. Magic meaning that you show us things that we cant see but fully understand so well but dont understand how you do it...that is your magic. Thanks for sharing great material with us.
Yeah that was perfect. I was sure you had created it cause I saw a keyboard in your videos, but I shasamed it anyways. Found nothing. “Looser” I said to myself
Today's gear can be found in my amazon affiliate shop. If you buy anything from there, youtubers will stop boring us with "cinematic" videos of their mom's car. www.amazon.com/shop/vegetablepolice Sony A7S III amzn.to/3mT4iIf Sony 20mm f1.8 amzn.to/32vATME
LOL! The label should probably be "cinematic look" rather than "cinematic" because they do LOOK like a movie, but devoid of any actual content. I've noticed this with travel videos, scenes of pretty places with music and often slo-mo, but absolutely devoid of any information. Great video, and hilarious!
@Tom Geldon well, yes, once they actually got color. Many of the great classics were shot in black and white. But yes, in previous eras they pretty much shot straight forward
Best laugh of the year so far! I'm literally crying! As a cinema lover, lot of "camera"youtubers are mistaking commercial-like videos and what is cinema. Is "commercialic" a word?
Following for a couple of years Mr K. And your vids just keep getting better and better. For me it's not about the camera's anymore. I just love your creativity. Love ya buddy.
I watched Tokyo Story the other day. I was outraged to find that everything in the frame was in focus throughout the film. Yasujiro Ozu, what an amateur.
90% of youtube needs to see this. yes 90% of all youtube. I also hate when people say "whatsup guys" or "like and subscribe". If I find you content of value to me I will like and if I'd like to see another video from you in the future I will subscribe. I'm not going to like and subscribe just because you told me to. It's not like I forgot those buttons were there. ALSO don't you dare say "roll that intro".
The reason they do this is because there's a statistically significant number of people who like and subscribe when the video creator reminds them to. You make some valid points but fail to understand that you yourself are an individual, and we are not the same as you.
Just discovered this channel...I was feeling gun-in-the-mouth depressed...your videos give me a laugh...good stuff...as long as you keep making these videos...I will stay alive.
It’s the same as that ‘ Kings Clothes ‘ story. Only the kids admit he hasn’t got any. The rest are sold on the cinematic look. I am glad you mentioned this, I have spent needless hours trying to figure out what it actually was.
Thank you for saying it out loud! So sick of "Cinematic Lighting", "Cinematic Drone Shots", "Cinematic Gimbal Moves", etc. 99,999% of those people have NEVER done a single movie/short movie and call themselves "Filmmakers". It's like saying "I'm a Chef" cause I can use a knife to cut onions...
That's always frustrated me! People will ask on forums, "How do I get that cinematic look?" And yet, no one bothers to ask them, "Well, it depends on which movie's look you'd want to mimic."
I’m just out here waiting for Coffee, the movie. It will definitely be an indie film, and the twist is that the coffee is in the late stages of cancer.
The story of this most cinematic of movies was centered around the rabid squirrels continuously and ominously stalking you in the background, toneh-ed out so that their identities were mysterious.
Another plague - UA-camrs saying 'I QUIT' etc. for click bait but their only quitting something minor not their channel. This needs to end - we need your voice,, your power, your Toneh.
If i see another UA-camr making a slow-mo cinematic coffee ,i swear to God...
i am going to do that, no one can stop me
Every other UA-camr has a video like "Epic Film Look for DSLR tutorial" and it's just the exposure triangle with said coffee b roll examples lmao.
I plead guilty..... I did the coffee making thing, with instant coffee...., burning my hands in the proceedings. But not in slow-mo, my cheap-ass DSLR doesn't have usable slow-mo.
@@marcelvanbodegom yeah guilty of the coffee test shoots as well. And don't worry I paid out for a c100 back then, and even that didn't have good slow mo either lol.
That will be me soon
"coffee isn't cinematic" dang dude just @ peter next time LOL
😂 shots seriously been fired
@Mark Vasquez What about - Epic Cienematic Caffee B-ROLL!
People who live near that park - "Hello, Police ? Yes, it's him again. He's in the park doing strange things and then he started filming our garbage. Please come quickly".
ahahahahaha (had the same thoughts)
Police: is he black though?
.
.
.
ooops. wrong country
😆😆😆😆😆
Cinematic: When the creator is fixated on HOW things are filmed, and not on WHAT is being filmed.
Actually you need to take both into account. But for YT it's mostly all about content. Unless your content is about being cinematic.
BINGO! It's style over substance. There is nothing wrong with wanting a certain look and style to HELP with the story, but if all you have is a look and try to build a story around it, you will always fail. As grandma would say about some men she has known, "All sizzle but no steak".
Man that CGI of the cripple hammer looks so real. CINEMATIC AF
I thought it was a real object until I realised it was added into the video during the editing 😂
@@StuartSuper79 CGI at a masterful level
The sequence is Alfred Hitchcock level suspense.
@@DixonLu Kasey is better than Alfred Hitchcock.
What, that wasn't real.. Nooooooo.You've broken the magic.
That framing was very cinematic. I like how the texture of the tree trunk leads our eyes to our hero suffering. We connect more that way.
If you are going to talk plagues on YT, what about the freakin thumbnails where people have their mouths open like they are getting their tonsils examined?
Especially reaction thumbnails it’s like seeing adult kindergarteners posting videos. LOL
So hate those exaggerated expressions. It's a childish way of getting attention.Don't even care to watch them just because of it.
Sadly, that thumbnail approach increases views.
Sad.
Another industry uses that look to indicate something that would fit a magnum.
i laughed the entire 11 minutes but seriously, i learned A TON from you on WHAT "CINEMATIC" REALLY IS! *THANKS*
For what it’s worth, I’m glad you and your channel(s) exist. ✌️❤️
Best thing I've seen in a long time. I totally did this shit. I feel so guilty...
I did to, but the difference is if you call it cinematic or not. I never called it cinematic. Than it's okay. He doesn't criticise those videos in itself. He criticises the fact that they all call them cinematic. 3 videos I did, beautiful shots. Not once I used the word cinematic.
Holy shit. laowhy86 is here. Love your channel!
Another roasting video destroyed every UA-camr that mentions Cinematic. That squirrel at 5:19 was cinematic.
she's tracking him! Freaking cinematic!!
I was thinking the same thing. Cinematic squirrel with all the blurr.
Hopefully one day, I'll walk into B&H, pickup a camera and read in the product description:
"Recommended by Camera Conspiracies"
Finally someone said it. The “cinematic” garbage on YT is unreal: you need ugly 2 tone only orange and teal color, slow mo on somebody’s feet, add some drone footage, make the image really blurry and noisy, get flare in the background, bokeh the shit out of it, and they think they are cinema. They are just losers.
Meanwhile cinema is super 35, f4 minimum, art direction and set design over grading, with static shots, and story.
Don’t forget the ots slo mo shot of the back of someone’s head
You forgot "slow mo of my instagram wife in a sun dress in the back yard with shadows cranked to +30%"
Cinematic orange saturated face.
Losers >:(
"So that's why sex hurts so much" - classic!
That’s some Crying Game level shyt 🤣
I like how the music changes when you say "the cinema is in your heart" and its the "we learned something and the show is about over" music. That's so...cinematic. Also using the same music in all your videos works well for you.
What's actually more annoying is when you look for a tutorial on YT, half of the time, in the middle of the video people start talking about the Squarespace website... it's so annoying and everyone has the same script to say, I am watching the video for the cinematic tutorial, not website creation...
Dear Squarespace ua-cam.com/video/_UNIVnfHmHg/v-deo.html
Sure, but until creators can pay rent in passion, creativity, and how cinematic their videos are...
@@UNLouise But at least they could customize their scripts, make more variations or maybe let youtube creators - who are believed to be CREATIVE people - to be involved in the script? To make it suit their content?
For example, Alt Shift X is master at smoothly transitioning from whatever he is talking about to advertisement and it is so good you don't think about skipping it at all. In most cases I skip the ad, because it's just the same boring script over and over again.
when Tony talks about Squarespace he is on an unreal ecstatic enthusiasm while Chelsea just want to cry
i knew and used the site since 2015, always smash L to skip their ad
This dude nailed many of the things that annoy me on the videography side of youtube. Many people with cameras, almost none of them with actual stories to tell.
Do I really want to know how amazing some dudes trip to Bali or Thailand was? Do I really want to see how gorgeous the plants they found on their morning stroll through the park look like? Your attractive good looking girlfriend dancing or running with her arms wide open while you pan around her with a camera on a gimbal looks good, but its as shallow as a puddle.
I've only seen some guys make really insteresting videos using these techniques, but they are extremely rare. I only know how bland this style is because, after doing it myself for some time, its quite clear how quickly the formula stops working.
I've got inspired by the first youtube 'cinematic' videos I've watched, went down the rabbithole, watched about 20 of them and came to the same conclusion. No substance, no story, no meaning. It became so boring watching these.
What you bring to us is pure magic. Magic meaning that you show us things that we cant see but fully understand so well but dont understand how you do it...that is your magic. Thanks for sharing great material with us.
“The real cinema is in your heart”. That statement belongs on a t-shirt.
Great idea!
My thoughts EXACTLY! Ive seen so many "cinematic" videos, that are just crappy slomo picture with nothing interesting happening. NOTHING!
The music during the cripple hammer chase scene was FANTASTIC!
Thanks! I made it just for that scene. It turned out nothing like I originally intended, but I like it :)
Yeah that was perfect. I was sure you had created it cause I saw a keyboard in your videos, but I shasamed it anyways. Found nothing. “Looser” I said to myself
@@cameraconspiracies what is that song type genre ?
His music is at:
vegetablepolice.bandcamp.com/
For example, one of my favs:
vegetablepolice.bandcamp.com/track/benevolent-beast
People seem to forget that visual storytelling is there to TELL STORIES. Thank you for this video, this will be the cure.
Slow mo B roll to music that has nothing to do with the video just pads out run time lol. It’s horrible . Thank you for bringing light to this plague
Today's gear can be found in my amazon affiliate shop. If you buy anything from there, youtubers will stop boring us with "cinematic" videos of their mom's car. www.amazon.com/shop/vegetablepolice
Sony A7S III amzn.to/3mT4iIf
Sony 20mm f1.8 amzn.to/32vATME
LOL! The label should probably be "cinematic look" rather than "cinematic" because they do LOOK like a movie, but devoid of any actual content. I've noticed this with travel videos, scenes of pretty places with music and often slo-mo, but absolutely devoid of any information. Great video, and hilarious!
@Tom Geldon well, yes, once they actually got color. Many of the great classics were shot in black and white. But yes, in previous eras they pretty much shot straight forward
@Tom Geldon LOL
Casey, you should do a "cinematic" time lapse of a bokeh (or toneh) slowly forming in the background
UA-camrs have completely bastardized the term “Filmmaker” too
The squirrels in the bokeh you hired were the best cinematic extras there are. I really felt them.
I did 120 FPS of still flowers. I'm sorry.
😆😆😆😆
Easily one of the best and most important and necessary video ever made on internet. Miss Toronto so much ❤️
The dynamic range is real in this one. Straight from the movies
So much fun to watch you video. Love them. Good vibes from France
“So that’s why sex hurts so much” 😂😂😂
One of my gripes for ages, thank you sir ! Thank you for calling this out !
You have inspired me to make vlogs as non cinematic as possible. I'm pretty sure I'll be very successful with your handy easy to understand tips. :-)
Best laugh of the year so far! I'm literally crying! As a cinema lover, lot of "camera"youtubers are mistaking commercial-like videos and what is cinema. Is "commercialic" a word?
Following for a couple of years Mr K. And your vids just keep getting better and better. For me it's not about the camera's anymore. I just love your creativity. Love ya buddy.
this is one of the best video you have ever made, Thank you!
Sad but true. UA-cam cinematic is a reason to set playback speed to 1.5x to avoid torture
The hammer chase scene is a flex of the A7S3 slo mo. That said, me and my 6 year old daughter had some good giggles watching and rewatching it.
Most hilarious video I've seen this year. Thank you so much for this. :)
2:23. That skit was way better then it had any right to be. Hilarious! Well done my dude!
The falling dead leaves on the plant has just given me a great idea for my next cinematic UA-cam video. Thanks! I’m eternally grateful!
give this guy the TRUTH award :))) bravo, thank you, MY faith in humanity was just restored with YOUR video
Always entertaining my friend! So much truth here. It’s all in telling the story.
Still a hundred times better than anything Peter McCanon ever did.
My God, this video is making me want that A7s3500$.
😂😂😂😂
Would make your reviews Cinematic masterpieces 👍🏼
Didn’t you call out a guy for lying about faa calling people wow 🤩
@@Dangling_Carrot Love it when my fans follow me around.
One of your best, amigo.
The end of this video is truly terrifying. Like watching the Rocky Horror Picture Show in a convalescent home on acid.
I’m speaking of course of the Canon Cripple Hammer section of this cinematic video.
That was one of your best videos man !
This is TOO FUNNY!!! (and i feel so guilty when i "try" to be cinematic........................LOL)
I watched Tokyo Story the other day. I was outraged to find that everything in the frame was in focus throughout the film. Yasujiro Ozu, what an amateur.
I have not laughed so hard in ages! Everything I do is Cinematic......
Thank you! I don’t get how people have started calling slow motion video cinematic. ITS SLOW MOTION VIDEO NOT CINEMATIC!
Woah, 6:04... the suspense, the drama, the tension, the anticipation. I thought I was watching a Blumhaus production! 🤣
The cinema is ours, my friend! Thank you for the tough love talk. Cinema Conspiracies for life!
thanks a lot for the music discography! I love the music in your vids!
oh, you made the music by yourself. Wow!
That camera's quality is stupendous!
You are seriously one of my favorite people in youtube
90% of youtube needs to see this. yes 90% of all youtube.
I also hate when people say "whatsup guys" or "like and subscribe". If I find you content of value to me I will like and if I'd like to see another video from you in the future I will subscribe. I'm not going to like and subscribe just because you told me to. It's not like I forgot those buttons were there.
ALSO don't you dare say "roll that intro".
how about "let's get into it"
The reason they do this is because there's a statistically significant number of people who like and subscribe when the video creator reminds them to. You make some valid points but fail to understand that you yourself are an individual, and we are not the same as you.
Adding the black lines top and bottom is all you have to do
Him “this isn’t cinematic”
My friend sitting next to me: “ok but why is this his most cinematic video yet” 😂
😆😆😆
I'm laughing out loud here, love your sense of humor. Already cinematically subscribed
LOL! It really was the dropping leaves over the flowers that did it for me. I always come here for a great laugh.
The secret is to tell a story
And not to add your teal and orange lut
This is THE GREATEST video on UA-cam. Thank you
Absolutely correct. In most cases, "cinematic" footage on UA-cam is just someone talking when they haveo nothing to say.
The most classic cinematic youtube video I have ever seen, brought me to tears when he said I killed your brother, ripped his hand right off. Bravo!
This video is for real, cinematic.
"Let me show you, what's not cinematic." *Insta360 ad starts* XD XD XD XD
Just discovered this channel...I was feeling gun-in-the-mouth depressed...your videos give me a laugh...good stuff...as long as you keep making these videos...I will stay alive.
Welcome to the cinema! This is your best video yet funny, entertaining and true.
This video is spot on. Damn the scene with the hammer is hysterical. Would like to have the soundtrack, haven't found it on Bandcamp.
It’s the same as that ‘ Kings Clothes ‘ story. Only the kids admit he hasn’t got any. The rest are sold on the cinematic look. I am glad you mentioned this, I have spent needless hours trying to figure out what it actually was.
You wise ass....this post should be shown in every film class.
😆😆👍thanks for the good mood! all to the point!
Hank became a home wrecker after he found out his man-girlfriend killed his brother. This is drama.
Just NAMING a character Hank is dramatic!
I love the idea of you acting in the park with all the kids running about like some crazy
The recommended video after watching this was "10 cinematic gimbal moves for beginners" 😂
you should do more toilet bowl light bathroom floor pov vlogs. it looked so cinematic i nearly fell off my director chair
YOOOOOOOO
This video legit had me ROLLLLIIIINNNNGGGG
Actual tears, Bruh
That part with Verone tho
LMAO
Dude not gonna lie I am so glad found your channel. Was looking for camera reviews and stumbled across the channel.... Hilarious!!!
Thank you for saying it out loud! So sick of "Cinematic Lighting", "Cinematic Drone Shots", "Cinematic Gimbal Moves", etc. 99,999% of those people have NEVER done a single movie/short movie and call themselves "Filmmakers". It's like saying "I'm a Chef" cause I can use a knife to cut onions...
this dude is funnier than most hollywood comedians wtf man
I laughed so hard at "Verone".. i was tearing up. True cinematography there.
God damn, you're funny as hell! So cinematic right now...and the amazing BLACK BARS...mind-blowing!
Did you just wake up today and decide to be weird..? Well, you nailed it dude; great cinematic video !!!
That's always frustrated me! People will ask on forums, "How do I get that cinematic look?" And yet, no one bothers to ask them, "Well, it depends on which movie's look you'd want to mimic."
I took a cinematic poo while watching this. It was glorious! Color graded with warm tones. Enjoy.
Now that's frickin funny🎸🦊🤩🧚🤸😊😘
I’m just out here waiting for Coffee, the movie. It will definitely be an indie film, and the twist is that the coffee is in the late stages of cancer.
Nice rant. Totally enjoyed it and full of a lot of truth.
How good is the image quality in this one! Cinematic even...
The story of this most cinematic of movies was centered around the rabid squirrels continuously and ominously stalking you in the background, toneh-ed out so that their identities were mysterious.
Another plague - UA-camrs saying 'I QUIT' etc. for click bait but their only quitting something minor not their channel. This needs to end - we need your voice,, your power, your Toneh.
that falling leave of magic, all you need for a cinematic shot.
Finally someone says what ive been thinking for years. The most overused word in video camera reviews.
you always brighten up my day thank you
This is a masterpiece. Thank you
Leaves falling and squirrels in the background made it so much more cinematic
This is hilarious, you should make a video on wedding “filmmakers” next! lol