Here's the research and remember always investigate for yourself: Meshi, D., Morawetz, C., & Heekeren, H. R. (2013). Nucleus accumbens response to gains in reputation for the self relative to gains for others predicts social media use. Frontiers in human neuroscience, 7, 439. Eisenberger, N. I., Lieberman, M. D., & Williams, K. D. (2003). Does rejection hurt? An fMRI study of social exclusion. Science, 302(5643), 290-292.
@Shade Zahrai i love your videos and the people related topics you speak. It has helped me on various occasions. Keep up putting grest content. Looking forward to have a one on one session with you.
I remember the quote “your mind is in a constant duality between how you see yourself and how others see you.” Point is, self-awareness helps you win that battle; you know who you are.
Rightly said, after being in a relationship for 7 years and then other person leaving made me realize my own self. Though it took another 2 more years and hell lot of physical pain and hurt. But overall a positive me came out of this incident, You are absolutely right, nowadays people, choice and things are quite easier to understand for me as self recognition is there. 🙂
When i get what others think of me as bad feedback, I move on work, family,social,power authorities, etc yes I become detachable in every way possible consequences because it's all around us.
We care what others think of us because humans are a highly social species and our individual success is largely a function of what others think of us.
practice building up ur self esteem so u become someone YOU like. remind urself of all the things u like about urself. and if there are some things u dont like & theyre changeable, change it ! if u wish u were more fit, then make a dedicated goal to start going to the gym & actually stick with it. if u wish u could wear the crazy fashion u imagine in ur head but think its too crazy/ppl will judge, practice wearing crazy outfits in small bits at a time until u get comfortable. basically, do little things everyday to make urself look and act like ur most ideal version of u & eventually the confidence will follow. u just have to make sure u keep practicing & dont give up no matter what the insecure ppl around u tell u. thats the only rule. cause if u dont give up, eventually u will realize there is nothing to be afraid of because most ppl are just insecure followers who might actually start copying ur crazy style if u do it with enough confidence lol
great advice. i can add to this by suggesting that the best way to naturally detach ourselves from our desire for validation and approval, is through brain training. I achieved this in the last 5 years, since practicing meditation and hatha yoga, in a very spiritual and personal journey. I have been studying these disciplines through Eastern religions and philosophy, focusing on inner change rather than the physical benefits as the focus. I had a troubled childhood without a quality father figure in my life and as a result, i experienced lack of self love, lack of confidence and lack of quality relationships in my younger years. I was too afraid to be alone. it took 38 years of life and a near death exprience to completely heal and become the strong leader i was born to be. I learned to free myself from the need to feel loved by others, when i learnt to love myself. Now, i am better equipped to actually help others themselves because of my journey. I also do not feel sad if others occasionally reject my help or my points of view. its all okay.
I never did cause I'm comfortable with myself I can go out to dinner alone and not feel like I'm outa place or anything. Also when I do I wind up meeting some ladies who are astounded by my self confidence , positivity and appreciation for the little things in life 👊🏽🤲🏽🙏🏽💯
You always ray joy and balance, this is the only video where it seems like you were sad... so hope i am wrong and where ever u stand at this moment ❤. It's always a joy to hear what u have to say
I know i m a good Person nd i tend to consider others more than me but i Ve really understood i m enough nd good so i must really try not to care what immature bad think of me
It has been Life crippling. Baby steps out of external approval. It's wild when it starts clicking into place that the wildest antics you could ever do would barely register with anyone around you after some time. It's painful to look at my past lost opportunities and as freeing for future me's potential. Anyone else relate or having that breakthrough?
I care, but I care more how they will treat me. Not as much what they think. If they don’t like me that’s hard, but because of trauma they usually indicates they will be negative towards me and hurt me. That’s what I’m truly afraid of, rejection, meanness, bullying. 💚
My wife is an approval seeker. She gets her feelings hurt way to much. I don't get hurt by people, my skin is way too thick and I'm smarter than most people that I know.
I agree with what you say mom I love with what you're thinking, if we practice it could really make a deffrence thank you for your kindness advices thank you again 💯🙏❤️
In my point of view it is generally happens in a young age when you are in 15-30 after that you are able to handle all such things ...n no one's opinion affects you.
Thanks a lot for researching so much, it helps in understanding it as a fact rather than a opinion. Facts are always preferred by the brain for assimilation. Funny part is being a med student, I studied about ventral striata being stressed about how much of the syllabus others might have completed and how much behind I will be. Well the key was in what I was studying 🤣😅
Here's the research and remember always investigate for yourself:
Meshi, D., Morawetz, C., & Heekeren, H. R. (2013). Nucleus accumbens response to gains in reputation for the self relative to gains for others predicts social media use. Frontiers in human neuroscience, 7, 439.
Eisenberger, N. I., Lieberman, M. D., & Williams, K. D. (2003). Does rejection hurt? An fMRI study of social exclusion. Science, 302(5643), 290-292.
I trust your word.
No need for corroboration.
👍
@Shade Zahrai i love your videos and the people related topics you speak. It has helped me on various occasions. Keep up putting grest content. Looking forward to have a one on one session with you.
Your videos make me smarter
Keep the videos coming plzz.....
I live my life that way. You think that too right? RIGHT? PLZ DONT IGNORE ME!!!!!
This is so important. I always just tell myself that I cannot please everybody. Makes a lot easier to accept rejections.
I remember the quote “your mind is in a constant duality between how you see yourself and how others see you.” Point is, self-awareness helps you win that battle; you know who you are.
What if i feel i dont know myself?
@@JolinHard you do know yourself, you just won’t come to terms with it since your under the pressure of believing what other people think you are.
@@JolinHardMeditation may help in developing this awareness, my friend
The biggest craving of all is the craving to get appreciated.
It is an addiction starts from our childhood.
Let’s detach ourselves from the need for validation and approval by others. Let’s break free and take pride in ourselves
It doesn't work that way
@@chaitanyarajesh1815 how does it work???
@@mr.rabbit8033 Your conscious mind does not have a 100% say on you
@P Pierre Amen 🙏🏾
and tell me how do you do that?.... million dollar question
It’s not just a reward thing. It’s literally important for our survival to be included at least in a certain group.
Rightly said, after being in a relationship for 7 years and then other person leaving made me realize my own self. Though it took another 2 more years and hell lot of physical pain and hurt. But overall a positive me came out of this incident, You are absolutely right, nowadays people, choice and things are quite easier to understand for me as self recognition is there. 🙂
I'm worthy and good enough. I don't need anyone to decide my worth !
I don't care about what people say about me. I make decisions on my own.
This is was so needed 😢...thankyou so much....I hope to detach myself from validation
This channel is a treasure I swear
That’s true… you can’t pleased everyone so take a chill pill 💊 and we should think about our own betterment 😇
"desire is the root of all suffering"
- Gautama Buddha
Why Is my middle name Desire !!
You are worthy enough. Value yourself. It's not based on what others think of you. Avoid looking for validation from others and live your life 😊
We want to be liked it’s our innate desire
I am loving it what you say , if we practice it could really make a difference!!
Finally a short video series that can add value. 😊 thank you 🙏
We must protect this gem at all costs.
Shadé please suggest some books for personal growth and development. Love your content..
Thank you this positive. Energy I appreciate that 🌺🌹🌺
When i get what others think of me as bad feedback, I move on work, family,social,power authorities, etc yes I become detachable in every way possible consequences because it's all around us.
such good advice I am a muslim and in islam god taught us to only look for him being satisfied with us not people
Thank you ma'am for good advice.Will help me be at peace with myself.
We care what others think of us because humans are a highly social species and our individual success is largely a function of what others think of us.
Survival instincts yep
How to detach myself from desire to validation and approval?
Live your life
Spirituality is the answer
practice building up ur self esteem so u become someone YOU like. remind urself of all the things u like about urself. and if there are some things u dont like & theyre changeable, change it ! if u wish u were more fit, then make a dedicated goal to start going to the gym & actually stick with it. if u wish u could wear the crazy fashion u imagine in ur head but think its too crazy/ppl will judge, practice wearing crazy outfits in small bits at a time until u get comfortable. basically, do little things everyday to make urself look and act like ur most ideal version of u & eventually the confidence will follow. u just have to make sure u keep practicing & dont give up no matter what the insecure ppl around u tell u. thats the only rule. cause if u dont give up, eventually u will realize there is nothing to be afraid of because most ppl are just insecure followers who might actually start copying ur crazy style if u do it with enough confidence lol
Give it to yourself
Shadé Can you please make a video of self development and growth in life. You are great.
Yes, but it's so natural....this need does not ever tend to reduce....I think it's human to seek such validations at times!
great advice. i can add to this by suggesting that the best way to naturally detach ourselves from our desire for validation and approval, is through brain training. I achieved this in the last 5 years, since practicing meditation and hatha yoga, in a very spiritual and personal journey. I have been studying these disciplines through Eastern religions and philosophy, focusing on inner change rather than the physical benefits as the focus. I had a troubled childhood without a quality father figure in my life and as a result, i experienced lack of self love, lack of confidence and lack of quality relationships in my younger years. I was too afraid to be alone. it took 38 years of life and a near death exprience to completely heal and become the strong leader i was born to be. I learned to free myself from the need to feel loved by others, when i learnt to love myself. Now, i am better equipped to actually help others themselves because of my journey. I also do not feel sad if others occasionally reject my help or my points of view. its all okay.
Thank you so much for sharing this knowledge 👍 as it will help me to eradicate one of my major problem - desire of validation and approval
I never did cause I'm comfortable with myself I can go out to dinner alone and not feel like I'm outa place or anything. Also when I do I wind up meeting some ladies who are astounded by my self confidence
, positivity and appreciation for the little things in life 👊🏽🤲🏽🙏🏽💯
God sent a few angels in this earth to take care of the planet. You are one of them.😊
Detachment is not easy when we depend on it for survival as social species
Brain acts according to the inputs very nice..❤
You have a perfect grip on your subject, respect from Melbourne.
You always ray joy and balance, this is the only video where it seems like you were sad... so hope i am wrong and where ever u stand at this moment ❤. It's always a joy to hear what u have to say
I already know this but sometimes it is really hard to implement.
Pure Golden content. 🔥
Shade, everything's ON POINT!! ❤️
😊 . Thanks for the revelations .
You are 💯 right ❤❤❤❤❤
Love watching ur videos… ur the best
Dr. Phil used to say, we wouldn't worry so much what others think of us if we realized just how seldom they actually do so!
I know i m a good Person nd i tend to consider others more than me but i Ve really understood i m enough nd good so i must really try not to care what immature bad think of me
It has been Life crippling. Baby steps out of external approval. It's wild when it starts clicking into place that the wildest antics you could ever do would barely register with anyone around you after some time. It's painful to look at my past lost opportunities and as freeing for future me's potential. Anyone else relate or having that breakthrough?
Needed to hear this tonight! Thank you. ❤
I care, but I care more how they will treat me. Not as much what they think. If they don’t like me that’s hard, but because of trauma they usually indicates they will be negative towards me and hurt me. That’s what I’m truly afraid of, rejection, meanness, bullying. 💚
YYYess! I did! And holy cow is it freeing!
I love your voice,,,, I can listen whole day ❤️
It's soft n painful...few have a voice that matches looks...She's the Elvis of advice.
You are a golden mine . That's why I love Sadhguru's Isha Kriya meditation : I' m not the body, I'm not even the mind / emotions. 🙏❤❤
absolutely right
Thank youuuu, Am learning
You are so addictive like your speech and content💕
I getting benefits from cognitive behavior theory as you said. Thanks a lot😊
My wife is an approval seeker. She gets her feelings hurt way to much. I don't get hurt by people, my skin is way too thick and I'm smarter than most people that I know.
Maybe us women are more sensitive to other's validation. Not all but often.
More sensitive nervesystem and for primary reasons who knows.
So.... Don't feel what your brain makes you feel all the time.... ✨✨✨
Yes it helps to know it's our brains giving pain signals. Distraction, doing other things to keep it moving like goig to the gym help me!
Can u plz make a video on why people usually escape those who helped them grow.
I agree with what you say mom I love with what you're thinking, if we practice it could really make a deffrence thank you for your kindness advices thank you again 💯🙏❤️
You are so welcome!
Why dies getting detached from people or listening to negative comments from them keeps us down always?
I love this Shadé, this is amazing 👏 😍 💜
In my point of view it is generally happens in a young age when you are in 15-30 after that you are able to handle all such things ...n no one's opinion affects you.
Thank you😎🙏🏻
Thanks very much
So much of the science !
I stopped caring what people think a long time ago. I feel sorry for people that do care.
I love how u do ur eye makeup
Try to validate and reward yourself 😊
Thanks a lot for researching so much, it helps in understanding it as a fact rather than a opinion. Facts are always preferred by the brain for assimilation. Funny part is being a med student, I studied about ventral striata being stressed about how much of the syllabus others might have completed and how much behind I will be. Well the key was in what I was studying 🤣😅
You’re right Dr
Thank you 😊
You're welcome 😊
I love your career tips they are exactly what I need lovely keep going
Idont care what others think of me in life now....i am my own person....im happy with me.😊
It's overwhelmingly hard.
Not so difficult when it's toxic friendships, or the workplace.
Not so easy when it's your parents.
It is easy to say but not easy to do...Anyway we can always try
This definitely helped today 😌💙😌💙😌
I was just thinking sbout this today❤..how did my phone know this😮
What others think about us is the most wasteful thought of our life
You are great😊❤
wisdom!
Could you please share journaling ideas to avoid stress
Thanks for sharing this. However, could you please also suggest some ideas…..to detach ourselves from desire for approval and validation.
in a world where social media apps are all about validation through photos, vids, etc. it’s harder said than done 😭 I’m working on it though 😅
By seeing you positive came easily
Hey dont reject me it hurts . It's same as physical pain
So, in lay man terms, don't seek approval from others. That's it!
Thank you!❤❤
❤love it
Plain & Simple... ❤️
You are best 🎉
Shadé, you are fabulous and this color and style of clothing syits you heaps.
Excellent advice @Shade 🤍
You are amazing 😂
You are awesome!!
आप यह कहना चाहती है की कर्म करो फल की चिंता मत करो ।
Said by lord krishna
Great advice ✍
Thank you mam
Most welcome 😊
good topic
Please advise on how to detach. What techniques to use.
Thanks mam.
It's good to be hated by others.
صحيح true