Getting away was the hardest and most painful experience i have ever gone through but in the end it was worth the going through the hurt. Once you see who and what they are you will never look at them the same.
@@caligirl9403 Yep best thing to do is to have a great life without them. I'm glad your healing it's quite hard getting to this point but once you get there it does become easier. I sincerely wish you peace and happiness.
I've come to realise that narcissists are stuck spiritually. Unable to truly love and be true they will never grow. Whereas the trauma they cause can enable us to wake up and ascend. The wound is where the light gets in. Thanks Joe and love to all who have been affected by narcissist abuse. Keep healing and keep growing 🍄❤️🙏
You know you’re over someone when you don’t hate them and you also don’t love them. You’re just mostly neutral. You still know they’re not for you and they’re icky but you aren’t emotionally charged about it. It’s just a fact.
This is how I knew I broke the trauma bond with one of the narcissists I dated before the pandemic. I feel nothing. He's just there. The anger and the attachment are gone. He turned me numb and I'm glad for it. 🙂
Numb,but forgiving,it does us no good to hold grudges! We have a changed mindset to soar above and learn to love ourself and our Creator,with His pure Love and Truth!
I was angry for a long time and couldn’t understand why,but it’s great to be free and being made whole,little by little! Always learning and growing in Spirt n Truth!
My narc wife discarded me. I honestly wanted to work it out and did everything possible. When I realized there was no working it out, I had to move 550 miles back to my hometown and I was ecstatic about going “home.” I said as much on social media and posted about my journey. I had a long and painful road ahead but sharing my journey was part of the healing to me. She lost her sh*t when she saw the posts and said people were asking her why I was so happy when this was supposed to be a difficult time for me. It’s because I’m not a completely miserable and pathetic human being. It’s because I can find good in the worst situation and capitalize on it. Was I hurt? ABSOLUTELY!!!!! But I knew I’d survive.
I called her bluff. She blurted out “I’m done”. After 4 1/2 years of dating and marriage. I had become a shell of who I used to be. Because I owned the house before her, I said fine. Get the hell out. She moved in with her sister and I filed for divorce. She went through tremendous changes as Joe described. Rages, anger, smears, hateful texts and emails, complete collapse. Been no contact for 8 months. Just crickets. I love life again.
@@libertyqq65 My ex is now so deafened by my silence, she sneaked an email to me accusing me of following her in the street " so close I could feel your breath on my neck" and threatened to have me arrested if I do anything intimidating again! Omg, I've gone blind as well now 😆. Don't flatter yourself Honey. I ignored it of course. 🥱
Thx Joe, I did exactly what you said on this video. My ex narc said the magic words, and I took the opportunity and ran. And I've stayed away going on 2 1/2 yrs with 100% no contact!
This is exactly what I did. She used a discard to hoover me and triangulate me against low hanging fruit back burner supply. I wasn't having it called her bluff and walked away. No contact for 7 months. I actually saw her driving to work about a month ago and she didn't see me because I was in a company vehicle but she looked utterly miserable and defeated. That's karma at play.
Wow😂 My ex-Narc posted on his fake Facebook account, "Fuckem all." Just that. Once I saw that, I made sure to block that account, too. This is 2 1/2 months of loosing me and whatever else he been up to. This dude has a little 2-yr old, a baby-mom and many exes, including me. He doesn't seem like he's living his best life, Lol. He's hateful, angry, & bitter. He should be. He's ruined relationships with people, and Lost an Amazing Woman💝 I'm better off Alone and Away from him.
This is my story. I never returned. No contact after he discarded me. I’ve been stone-cold to him despite numerous hoover attempts. I thank the Almighty Elohim for giving me the opportunity to get out and the revelation of knowing he’s a narc. Stay strong.❤Thanks Joe.
Have you noticed that they want you to be there mini me and if you're not, you're bad? lol It's fascinating really They think you're doing to them what they're actually doing to you 😮😮
He mask fell off when I tried to make him accountable for never having any money . I wasted another two years trying to figure out what was the matter with him 😩😩😩😩when I came across the word narcissist everything fell into place . When he went to work one morning I upped and left after being with him for 25 years and boy did he have a collapse ! I never smeared his name as he is very clever and I would have looked like I was crazy ! I have to have a small amount of contact as we have assets which are being sorted out and he hasn’t recovered after 1.5 years - I on the other hand am enjoying my life to the fullest ! I should have left years ago ! Once you do the work and realise that you’ve got issues too , you become that strong that no one will ever treat you like that again - it’s like being reborn but this time life is for living life to the fullest !
I took one of best actions of my life not to talk to her, when she returned after a month and call me back. After recogniging her, just gave it a silent pause and cut the call showing absolutely no emotion, no hate, no love, no arguments, no blame, nothing. Well, even I didn't discover at that time that she was a narcissist. The way things ended, she left no room for any attention from me. I'm so glad that I had the guts to do that. Even though I was still in trauma bond and healing was processing. I always feel proud of myself just by remembering that.
That's what I couldn't understand. I paid all the bills. Loved her unconditionally. Never cheated on her...i am so glad I found this channel...❤..i would say. Why do you choose to struggle????? Crickets. 0. Nothing ....
Good Morning to all ! 🌞a cup of joe with Joe is the best☕☕!!! Thank God we dont have those bluff masters in our life anymore ! Life is good ! Thank you Joe !!! 🤗❤
When you stand your ground and stand up to them and refuse to back down,you get labelled stubborn,,but it’s a great asset when you need to protect yourself ! It can be hard if not used for good! Beware of our motives and stay sweet,we are in a war and self control is vital ,we don’t want to become like them!
Did this a few days ago. I was called every name imaginable and was told to take my own life…really!? multiple times! I have existing mental health issues and now this trauma bond. I will overcome.
My narcissist laugh at me on the way out the door moving to another whole state later on through his relatives I find out he has a lot of health issues cancer etcetera etcetera etcetera nothing better than the trash taken out itself I feel better and I look better and those who are victims of narcissists you shall overcome this to sending out healing vibes🤗
I had no clue. The relationship was terminated by him. August 2020.. He had found an ex girlfriend from 38 years ago. He told me he was in love with another woman.. I was discarded. I believe I caused him an ego injury. I didn't behave as he expected. Then I was threatened with eviction. He had never loved me apparently I published my book in 2022. To raise awareness of the hidden emotional abuse in relationships. Plus highlights the gaps in the laws that allows abuse to continue Post Separation.
I called her bluff....9 days later she had a new supply in her home for all of cmas holidays with her 2 children present. Lol😂. I had spent all of Thanksgiving prior w her & what i thought were my soon to be step kids. 9yrs she tossed in garbage to monekybranch.
My narc ex said I never really loved her because I left “too easily” after she broke up with me. Soon after she broke up with me (in front of her kids), I left, and she treated me as if I was the one discarding her. She accused me of throwing her in the garbage.
Yeah he is really a bluff to me..I've wasted my life with him..for almost 4 years emotionally and mentally tortured...treatment him nicely but no point..he everything said don't care...so difficult to let go him but everything happens for a reason..thanks Joe
Even better, leave them after they leave you. Or, more specifically I should say. Block them from coming back that's what hurts them n do it by instruction w silence yes.
Great explanation. It helps me understand what was going on under the surface that I couldnt quite grasp. I appreciate the way you put that. And yes ... I left upbruptly. The reaction is just as you said. Call thejr bluff. They are nothing more than a 9 foot mouth in a 2 inch body. You are stronger than you know.
Oh yes they hate surprises. Be unpredictable. “The worst thing you can do to somebody is nothing at all”! So true they hate indifference. Once they don’t matter and that trauma bond is broken start saying things like whatever who care it doesn’t matter. It drives them crazy. They want this sick relationship to matter once you quit playing their lost. You say…..”you win, counseling is stupid, emotions are for the weak, nothing really matters! They want you to fight for them and this relationship once you stop they baffled. The game was always love me to your detriment save me and this relationship you dumb ass and I’ll hate you in return. Now its I love myself and secretly hate you and will eventually discard you when I’m good and ready. I’m fearless. You have to hate what God hates people. These things are devils. I hate them! Do nothing just love yourself stop hating yourself by loving a devil. Hate the devil. It’s powerful. We were never taught to hate these devils but love them into the kingdom. God never said that . He said “Come and be separate and what does light and dark have in common?” Give satan what belongs to satan indifference/hate but do it with kindness.
Thank you. This was yet another incredibly profound and very helpful video. This provides a lot of insight into how my ex narc acted at the end, and how their bravado and confidence during the discard was really just another illusion and a lie. I know now they were actually very wounded and just trying to cover it up and run from the truth.
Yes Joe, I was in a controlled childhood & I just walked into a toxic relationship , one year ago was beautiful then one year later I called him out, just told him that I knew what he was. I called his bluff, & said that we are done ! He just raged & told me I was sick & twisted so I'm just gonna go invisible for a while & wait for the results.
After telling my so called narc friend the jokes about my life threatening disease were unkind and hurtful, the jokes didn’t stop. In fact, they got weaponized and intensified. I decided to pull myself out of the ‘friendship’ and give him ziltsch response. Up till today he tries to contact me but no response is a response also. The strongest response there is. No more. He knows why. He just doesn’t act like it. He is a narc. That is why he is f-ed up so much.
That’s similar to what happened to me , after 8 years she says she doesn’t need me or a male for that matter in her life anymore. So after that I found some self respect and left. Wasn’t easy, lonely nights, some very dark moments there to be honest, but once you get through the other side, well it’s bliss . This Chanel and the way Joe presents it is very cool and I’m glad to have stumbled across it👍.
Go, no contact , don't submitt and cut ties all together, don't depend on them for anything connect with the right people who uplifts , they will expose themselves and fall into their own traps
Survivor here! I was financially dependent on him. He told me to get out of our shared home multiple times. The final time I left for good relocating to another city for work. He continues to try to replace me. He still hasn't found anyone. No one else is interested in being his cook and housekeeper.
Discarded a month ago. I keep telling myself that any man who ISNT afraid to lose me isn’t the man for me. He texted me once within this month but I didn’t respond. I wanted to but I didn’t. It’s so hard to love someone who is no good for you. I need to heal and I know I need to “work on myself” but what does that even technically mean? Workout? Already do. Have friends and a great job? Already have them. What will it take to forget him? I’m guessing it’s getting back in the saddle and meeting someone new. I think that’s what I need to do.
I discarded my guy and blocked his number, he texted me from a another number I responded then blocked that number lol no more mind games MR! 🤣 I’m over it
After healing I sometimes feel like I'm surrounded with energy sphere that reflects any negative or deceiving thoughts or intentions of my narc towards me. I have a very good intuition (so does she).
I wish I could get my mom out of my life, but she has everyone else in the family convinced that I rely on her. The family is going to have a rude awakening when I give the eulogy at her funeral someday and "spill the beans" about everything she has done since the 1970's when this shit all began, from sexual abuse to physical abuse to emotional abuse.
I'm sorry that happened to you..😔 Makes me sad and I know you're a complete stranger. I been through a lot myself 😔 But, I hope that you are in a better place or are getting there. May God Bless You & take away your pain🙏💙
@@SagittariusBabe87 Thank you! I'm pretty resilient and work through it well. The good part is this experience makes it easier for me to help other friends when they're going through a rough patch.
@@paulis7319 You're welcome☺️☺️☺️ Exactly! You can help others. I bet you're an awesome person & a great friend, after everything you been through. What doesn't kill us, makes us stronger 💪😁💪
This isn't the worst thing you can do to a narcissist, calling their bluff. The worst thing you can do is unmask them to the world. Not smear them, unmask them. Smearing is telling people who you think they are, unmasking is showing the world who they really are. There are two major problem with this though, one is that it's incredibly difficult because they tend not to do things without plausible deniability. You have to get them to a place where they are so far into delusion they are acting in ways no one is willing to excuse. The second major problem is that it is exceedingly dangerous. If a narcissist even thinks there's a chance someone might successfully unmask them they will do anything to stop them, including ending that person. However, if you can keep yourself safe, and know how to play the long game, you can unmask them, and it's the most devastating thing you can do to a narcissist.
I would say the risks involved if things go wrong far outweigh the benefits. A desperate person with no empathy and everything to lose is extremely dangerous.
@@tjfSIM Do you know what's more dangerous than someone with everything to lose? Someone with nothing to lose, because the were born into a family of desperate people with no empathy.
I enjoy listening to your advice. The narcissist I used to know hates my existence. It’s weird but I swear I can feel his anger from miles away. The best part is I just don’t care 😊.
It's not weird I know exactly what you mean. Spiritual phenomenon occur irrespective of physical distance. I swear I feel mine from 10 years ago, she is always so angry, I actually pray for healing for her as well
They devalue people because they’re with them. Because deep down they know that they’re not good people and certainly not a person someone should still want to be with, so when someone stays with them, that person starts to lose a lot of worth/value in the narcissist’s mind and they begin to think something must be wrong with you if you’re still with them.
...to convince themselves they hate you, to forget you, but they can't. To convince themselves, they don't envy what you have, but they do. Since they are smearing you, you are still on their mind... they miss you in the in the most mental way. In the end, they hate themselves!
Dr Phil calls it leveling, the Narc always needs you to be lower than them, they need to be superior to you always in their sick minds, they want you to think less of yourself so they can feel good about themselves, it’s the push/pull cycle, build you up, knock you down, it’s an Evil, sick game they play on everyone their with.
I find your videos so calming and comforting. I'll be listening for a while as I recover from 7 months of confusion, exhaustion, highs and huge lows. I'm one of the lucky ones to get out when I did. Feel for everyone else who had a narc in their lives for years 😔
What does it mean when the narcissist during no contact keep posting/sharing subs & bitter ex videos & quotes? Its been 7 weeks he still posting negative relationships stuff.
@@CherryBlossom-vr2dc They don’t see proof that I checked. I’m human and the breakup was fresh. I checked on thanksgiving during a weak moment. Hadn’t looked in 5 weeks. Thanks for making victims feel like sh*t. It’s normal to go through the grieving process this way. Everyone goes through that… it’s a reason you still watching these videos eventually YOU still got them in your mind rent-free. It’s okay to want to understand others actions. You are probably the unempathic narcissist!
They feel so dumb when you escape. I joined the army to get away from my mother. She had the nerve to ask me, “who told you you can go to the army?” I’m like I’m 18, I don’t need a permission slip. Don’t you remember telling me I had to get out when I turned 18 for the last 5 years because you don’t get a child support check for me⁉️ She felt so dumb. I don’t know why she thought I’d want to continue to be tortured and driven insane by the day. Good riddance, I rather be faced with an impending war… 🥱
Me; just thought if you loved me you would want to talk to me not sure what this is but it sure dont feel like love. Her: here we go here we go i'm so not in the mood for this today. Then she blocked me
That's what I did to the narc after 23 yrs of 'marriage' he gave up trying to control me and took off he also remarried , that was 10 yrs ago not once have I tried to contact him, 'don't let the door slam you butt', 10 yrs of peace.
Joe you help me so much! I feel the healing is a roller coaster also! Not sure they even feel a loss from anything! I regret losing 10 yr and wonder if I ever will meet someone! I know I need to get right between my ears! After multiple breakups I finally feel different!
Narcs also give you bad memory your hippocampus in the brain shrinks. I forgot things (I even forgot where I put my bike one day😳) when I was in touch with him so now I need to rebuild with lots of supplements! My sister has been with a narsisist for 16 years………😳😳 and she and her husband have my daughter since she was 3, they have abused my daughter for several years and I dont know what to do. Im working to get my girl home and have started to give her supplements that heals narsisistic abuse! This yourney is though! I wish Id never chase my twinflame for 3 years maybe I wouldve had my daughter home earlier….. what about hitting the narc and telling him the sex was bad etc. i treated him badly back at him I also spit in his face. He enjoyed it
can't get away. Soul is always inside that container you transferred it to whilst Loving. Living Truth is the only way (I completely experienced an invert with the Faith of Love when I listened to Ram Dass on conscious Living/ Dying
The narcissist was playing games and she wasn’t the first narcissist I had in my life so I’m pretty experienced with them. I blocked her for one week. She drove 40 miles to my house to put a note on the door. I figured well I’ll try and call her again so then I called her again and that little situation lasted may be another three weeks then I blocked her for two weeks so she would understand what’s going on and she came back around again now this time I’ve blocked her for two months and I don’t believe at all. I want anything to do with her again. Not at all she drinks uses pills and blows loud farts to me she’s useless.
Leave and never speak to them again. You heal, they crumble.
Getting away was the hardest and most painful experience i have ever gone through but in the end it was worth the going through the hurt. Once you see who and what they are you will never look at them the same.
I know exactly what u mean it's like they're completly different person someone you don't want around
The pain is unbearable, you think you will never make it out. Even enemies don't treat you that bad.
@@caligirl9403 They will get back what they dished out.Just a matter of time and we probably won't get to see it.
@@caligirl9403 Yep best thing to do is to have a great life without them. I'm glad your healing it's quite hard getting to this point but once you get there it does become easier. I sincerely wish you peace and happiness.
Exactly! I feel the same. It's very, very painful. Processing everything and the delayed realizations. But, you can't un-see what you've seen.
Call their bluff with a no caring no warning no explanation no contact FOREVER . The ultimate check mate game over .
I've come to realise that narcissists are stuck spiritually. Unable to truly love and be true they will never grow. Whereas the trauma they cause can enable us to wake up and ascend. The wound is where the light gets in. Thanks Joe and love to all who have been affected by narcissist abuse. Keep healing and keep growing 🍄❤️🙏
Love analogy, the wound is where the light is let in sweet
Wow so true
🙏
You know you’re over someone when you don’t hate them and you also don’t love them. You’re just mostly neutral. You still know they’re not for you and they’re icky but you aren’t emotionally charged about it. It’s just a fact.
This is how I knew I broke the trauma bond with one of the narcissists I dated before the pandemic. I feel nothing. He's just there. The anger and the attachment are gone. He turned me numb and I'm glad for it. 🙂
Numb,but forgiving,it does us no good to hold grudges! We have a changed mindset to soar above and learn to love ourself and our Creator,with His pure Love and Truth!
I was angry for a long time and couldn’t understand why,but it’s great to be free and being made whole,little by little! Always learning and growing in Spirt n Truth!
Yup this!!! Loving the freedom, and light inside is shining at full capacity again!!
This is what I’m working towards. Complete and utter indifference.
That's Me, I'm GONE!!!
Never see me again.
I feel great, while they feel stupid.
My narc wife discarded me. I honestly wanted to work it out and did everything possible. When I realized there was no working it out, I had to move 550 miles back to my hometown and I was ecstatic about going “home.” I said as much on social media and posted about my journey. I had a long and painful road ahead but sharing my journey was part of the healing to me. She lost her sh*t when she saw the posts and said people were asking her why I was so happy when this was supposed to be a difficult time for me. It’s because I’m not a completely miserable and pathetic human being. It’s because I can find good in the worst situation and capitalize on it. Was I hurt? ABSOLUTELY!!!!! But I knew I’d survive.
I called her bluff. She blurted out “I’m done”. After 4 1/2 years of dating and marriage. I had become a shell of who I used to be. Because I owned the house before her, I said fine. Get the hell out. She moved in with her sister and I filed for divorce. She went through tremendous changes as Joe described. Rages, anger, smears, hateful texts and emails, complete collapse. Been no contact for 8 months. Just crickets. I love life again.
Yes, exactly, I love life again and solidarity!
👍👊❤.....and yea, the crickets are priceless.
Just crickets lol❤️🩹
Yup, I love those bluffs. They're a blessing in disguise!
@@libertyqq65 My ex is now so deafened by my silence, she sneaked an email to me accusing me of following her in the street " so close I could feel your breath on my neck" and threatened to have me arrested if I do anything intimidating again!
Omg, I've gone blind as well now 😆.
Don't flatter yourself Honey.
I ignored it of course.
🥱
Thx Joe, I did exactly what you said on this video. My ex narc said the magic words, and I took the opportunity and ran. And I've stayed away going on 2 1/2 yrs with 100% no contact!
Well done!
This is exactly what I did. She used a discard to hoover me and triangulate me against low hanging fruit back burner supply. I wasn't having it called her bluff and walked away. No contact for 7 months. I actually saw her driving to work about a month ago and she didn't see me because I was in a company vehicle but she looked utterly miserable and defeated. That's karma at play.
Wow😂 My ex-Narc posted on his fake Facebook account, "Fuckem all." Just that. Once I saw that, I made sure to block that account, too. This is 2 1/2 months of loosing me and whatever else he been up to. This dude has a little 2-yr old, a baby-mom and many exes, including me. He doesn't seem like he's living his best life, Lol. He's hateful, angry, & bitter. He should be. He's ruined relationships with people, and Lost an Amazing Woman💝 I'm better off Alone and Away from him.
Stay away. Deal breakers are triangulation, and projection. Im outta there. 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
At least yours worked 😂 . .
@@scottoz7891 Shes an attorney so very successful in her careerbut not as a person!
This is my story. I never returned. No contact after he discarded me. I’ve been stone-cold to him despite numerous hoover attempts. I thank the Almighty Elohim for giving me the opportunity to get out and the revelation of knowing he’s a narc. Stay strong.❤Thanks Joe.
Ooh Joe, I have inflicted narcissistic injuries on a couple of people who expected me to take on the abuse indefinitely! 😂
Have you noticed that they want you to be there mini me and if you're not, you're bad? lol
It's fascinating really
They think you're doing to them what they're actually doing to you 😮😮
He mask fell off when I tried to make him accountable for never having any money . I wasted another two years trying to figure out what was the matter with him 😩😩😩😩when I came across the word narcissist everything fell into place . When he went to work one morning I upped and left after being with him for 25 years and boy did he have a collapse ! I never smeared his name as he is very clever and I would have looked like I was crazy ! I have to have a small amount of contact as we have assets which are being sorted out and he hasn’t recovered after 1.5 years - I on the other hand am enjoying my life to the fullest ! I should have left years ago ! Once you do the work and realise that you’ve got issues too , you become that strong that no one will ever treat you like that again - it’s like being reborn but this time life is for living life to the fullest !
I took one of best actions of my life not to talk to her, when she returned after a month and call me back. After recogniging her, just gave it a silent pause and cut the call showing absolutely no emotion, no hate, no love, no arguments, no blame, nothing.
Well, even I didn't discover at that time that she was a narcissist. The way things ended, she left no room for any attention from me. I'm so glad that I had the guts to do that. Even though I was still in trauma bond and healing was processing.
I always feel proud of myself just by remembering that.
Thank you Joe, that's my mission, I just want to escape after 34yrs now I am sick of his narcissistic rages.
I want to save what's left of my life.
That's what I couldn't understand. I paid all the bills. Loved her unconditionally. Never cheated on her...i am so glad I found this channel...❤..i would say. Why do you choose to struggle????? Crickets. 0. Nothing ....
Good Morning to all ! 🌞a cup of joe with Joe is the best☕☕!!! Thank God we dont have those bluff masters in our life anymore ! Life is good ! Thank you Joe !!! 🤗❤
Good Morning 🌄 and thank you! ❤
This describes exactly what I just went through! I left hard no contact. He is eating my dust! 😂 Thanks Joe, this validates I did the right thing!
When you stand your ground and stand up to them and refuse to back down,you get labelled stubborn,,but it’s a great asset when you need to protect yourself ! It can be hard if not used for good! Beware of our motives and stay sweet,we are in a war and self control is vital ,we don’t want to become like them!
Did this a few days ago. I was called every name imaginable and was told to take my own life…really!? multiple times!
I have existing mental health issues and now this trauma bond. I will overcome.
My narcissist laugh at me on the way out the door moving to another whole state later on through his relatives I find out he has a lot of health issues cancer etcetera etcetera etcetera nothing better than the trash taken out itself I feel better and I look better and those who are victims of narcissists you shall overcome this to sending out healing vibes🤗
I had no clue.
The relationship was terminated by him. August 2020.. He had found an ex girlfriend from 38 years ago.
He told me he was in love with another woman..
I was discarded.
I believe I caused him an ego injury.
I didn't behave as he expected.
Then I was threatened with eviction.
He had never loved me apparently
I published my book in 2022.
To raise awareness of the hidden emotional abuse in relationships.
Plus highlights the gaps in the laws that allows abuse to continue
Post Separation.
I called her bluff....9 days later she had a new supply in her home for all of cmas holidays with her 2 children present. Lol😂. I had spent all of Thanksgiving prior w her & what i thought were my soon to be step kids. 9yrs she tossed in garbage to monekybranch.
My narc ex said I never really loved her because I left “too easily” after she broke up with me. Soon after she broke up with me (in front of her kids), I left, and she treated me as if I was the one discarding her. She accused me of throwing her in the garbage.
Thank You!
Yeah he is really a bluff to me..I've wasted my life with him..for almost 4 years emotionally and mentally tortured...treatment him nicely but no point..he everything said don't care...so difficult to let go him but everything happens for a reason..thanks Joe
Even better, leave them after they leave you. Or, more specifically I should say. Block them from coming back that's what hurts them n do it by instruction w silence yes.
Great explanation. It helps me understand what was going on under the surface that I couldnt quite grasp. I appreciate the way you put that. And yes ... I left upbruptly. The reaction is just as you said. Call thejr bluff. They are nothing more than a 9 foot mouth in a 2 inch body. You are stronger than you know.
Big talkin. Small Fry.....
Oh yes they hate surprises. Be unpredictable. “The worst thing you can do to somebody is nothing at all”! So true they hate indifference. Once they don’t matter and that trauma bond is broken start saying things like whatever who care it doesn’t matter. It drives them crazy. They want this sick relationship to matter once you quit playing their lost. You say…..”you win, counseling is stupid, emotions are for the weak, nothing really matters! They want you to fight for them and this relationship once you stop they baffled. The game was always love me to your detriment save me and this relationship you dumb ass and I’ll hate you in return. Now its I love myself and secretly hate you and will eventually discard you when I’m good and ready. I’m fearless. You have to hate what God hates people. These things are devils. I hate them! Do nothing just love yourself stop hating yourself by loving a devil. Hate the devil. It’s powerful. We were never taught to hate these devils but love them into the kingdom. God never said that . He said “Come and be separate and what does light and dark have in common?” Give satan what belongs to satan indifference/hate but do it with kindness.
Great comment. ❤
This video is very interesting and informative. Thank you 🙏🏿 so much.
New follower here!
Thank you. This was yet another incredibly profound and very helpful video. This provides a lot of insight into how my ex narc acted at the end, and how their bravado and confidence during the discard was really just another illusion and a lie. I know now they were actually very wounded and just trying to cover it up and run from the truth.
Yes Joe, I was in a controlled childhood & I just walked into a toxic relationship , one year ago was beautiful then one year later I called him out, just told him that I knew what he was. I called his bluff, & said that we are done ! He just raged & told me I was sick & twisted so I'm just gonna go invisible for a while & wait for the results.
Tell em they have no power over you. Then totally tease em and ignore them 😂🎉🖕🖕🖕🖕
After telling my so called narc friend the jokes about my life threatening disease were unkind and hurtful, the jokes didn’t stop. In fact, they got weaponized and intensified. I decided to pull myself out of the ‘friendship’ and give him ziltsch response. Up till today he tries to contact me but no response is a response also. The strongest response there is. No more. He knows why. He just doesn’t act like it. He is a narc. That is why he is f-ed up so much.
That’s similar to what happened to me , after 8 years she says she doesn’t need me or a male for that matter in her life anymore.
So after that I found some self respect and left.
Wasn’t easy, lonely nights, some very dark moments there to be honest, but once you get through the other side, well it’s bliss .
This Chanel and the way Joe presents it is very cool and I’m glad to have stumbled across it👍.
Go, no contact , don't submitt and cut ties all together, don't depend on them for anything connect with the right people who uplifts , they will expose themselves and fall into their own traps
Survivor here! I was financially dependent on him. He told me to get out of our shared home multiple times. The final time I left for good relocating to another city for work. He continues to try to replace me. He still hasn't found anyone. No one else is interested in being his cook and housekeeper.
Discarded a month ago. I keep telling myself that any man who ISNT afraid to lose me isn’t the man for me. He texted me once within this month but I didn’t respond. I wanted to but I didn’t. It’s so hard to love someone who is no good for you. I need to heal and I know I need to “work on myself” but what does that even technically mean? Workout? Already do. Have friends and a great job? Already have them. What will it take to forget him? I’m guessing it’s getting back in the saddle and meeting someone new. I think that’s what I need to do.
Did you discard him? And he only texted you once in the month, that's not bad.
I discarded my guy and blocked his number, he texted me from a another number I responded then blocked that number lol no more mind games MR! 🤣 I’m over it
After healing I sometimes feel like I'm surrounded with energy sphere that reflects any negative or deceiving thoughts or intentions of my narc towards me. I have a very good intuition (so does she).
I wish I could get my mom out of my life, but she has everyone else in the family convinced that I rely on her. The family is going to have a rude awakening when I give the eulogy at her funeral someday and "spill the beans" about everything she has done since the 1970's when this shit all began, from sexual abuse to physical abuse to emotional abuse.
I'm sorry that happened to you..😔 Makes me sad and I know you're a complete stranger. I been through a lot myself 😔 But, I hope that you are in a better place or are getting there. May God Bless You & take away your pain🙏💙
@@SagittariusBabe87 Thank you! I'm pretty resilient and work through it well. The good part is this experience makes it easier for me to help other friends when they're going through a rough patch.
@@paulis7319 You're welcome☺️☺️☺️
Exactly! You can help others. I bet you're an awesome person & a great friend, after everything you been through. What doesn't kill us, makes us stronger 💪😁💪
This isn't the worst thing you can do to a narcissist, calling their bluff. The worst thing you can do is unmask them to the world. Not smear them, unmask them. Smearing is telling people who you think they are, unmasking is showing the world who they really are. There are two major problem with this though, one is that it's incredibly difficult because they tend not to do things without plausible deniability. You have to get them to a place where they are so far into delusion they are acting in ways no one is willing to excuse. The second major problem is that it is exceedingly dangerous. If a narcissist even thinks there's a chance someone might successfully unmask them they will do anything to stop them, including ending that person. However, if you can keep yourself safe, and know how to play the long game, you can unmask them, and it's the most devastating thing you can do to a narcissist.
I would say the risks involved if things go wrong far outweigh the benefits. A desperate person with no empathy and everything to lose is extremely dangerous.
@@tjfSIM Do you know what's more dangerous than someone with everything to lose? Someone with nothing to lose, because the were born into a family of desperate people with no empathy.
I wouldn't survive going back!!!
Me too
💯💯💯💯💯WELL SAID💯💯💯💯
I enjoy listening to your advice. The narcissist I used to know hates my existence. It’s weird but I swear I can feel his anger from miles away. The best part is I just don’t care 😊.
It's not weird I know exactly what you mean. Spiritual phenomenon occur irrespective of physical distance. I swear I feel mine from 10 years ago, she is always so angry, I actually pray for healing for her as well
Good video.😊
But why do they devalue people so much?
To get you trauma bonded to them.
They devalue people because they’re with them. Because deep down they know that they’re not good people and certainly not a person someone should still want to be with, so when someone stays with them, that person starts to lose a lot of worth/value in the narcissist’s mind and they begin to think something must be wrong with you if you’re still with them.
...to convince themselves they hate you, to forget you, but they can't.
To convince themselves, they don't envy what you have, but they do. Since they are smearing you, you are still on their mind... they miss you in the in the most mental way. In the end, they hate themselves!
Because they are pure sure volcanos. Which implodes within them time to time in regular intervals. Which impacts earthquake (devalue.)
Dr Phil calls it leveling, the Narc always needs you to be lower than them, they need to be superior to you always in their sick minds, they want you to think less of yourself so they can feel good about themselves, it’s the push/pull cycle, build you up, knock you down, it’s an Evil, sick game they play on everyone their with.
I find your videos so calming and comforting. I'll be listening for a while as I recover from 7 months of confusion, exhaustion, highs and huge lows. I'm one of the lucky ones to get out when I did. Feel for everyone else who had a narc in their lives for years 😔
She's 46...maybe time to change??????
Thanks,
Thank you.
What does it mean when the narcissist during no contact keep posting/sharing subs & bitter ex videos & quotes? Its been 7 weeks he still posting negative relationships stuff.
@@CherryBlossom-vr2dc
They don’t see proof that I checked. I’m human and the breakup was fresh. I checked on thanksgiving during a weak moment. Hadn’t looked in 5 weeks. Thanks for making victims feel like sh*t. It’s normal to go through the grieving process this way. Everyone goes through that… it’s a reason you still watching these videos eventually YOU still got them in your mind rent-free. It’s okay to want to understand others actions. You are probably the unempathic narcissist!
They feel so dumb when you escape. I joined the army to get away from my mother. She had the nerve to ask me, “who told you you can go to the army?” I’m like I’m 18, I don’t need a permission slip. Don’t you remember telling me I had to get out when I turned 18 for the last 5 years because you don’t get a child support check for me⁉️ She felt so dumb. I don’t know why she thought I’d want to continue to be tortured and driven insane by the day. Good riddance, I rather be faced with an impending war… 🥱
Dealing with a narcissist is war. Spiritual warfare.
@@wmhhealth2018 I’m aware, almost drove me insane. I’m not embellishing, thank God for rescuing me. 🙏🏾
Me; just thought if you loved me you would want to talk to me
not sure what this is but it sure dont feel like love.
Her: here we go
here we go
i'm so not in the mood for this today.
Then she blocked me
Speechless is really aphasia
This is my story ugh
That's what I did to the narc after 23 yrs of 'marriage' he gave up trying to control me and took off he also remarried , that was 10 yrs ago not once have I tried to contact him, 'don't let the door slam you butt', 10 yrs of peace.
Joe you help me so much! I feel the healing is a roller coaster also!
Not sure they even feel a loss from anything! I regret losing 10 yr and wonder if I ever will meet someone! I know I need to get right between my ears! After multiple breakups I finally feel different!
Spot on!
❤
I Love the guidance wisdom u share in your truth tales of a narcissistic surviver to thriver.💪💧
My narc after seven days found a new supply
Narcs also give you bad memory your hippocampus in the brain shrinks. I forgot things (I even forgot where I put my bike one day😳) when I was in touch with him so now I need to rebuild with lots of supplements! My sister has been with a narsisist for 16 years………😳😳 and she and her husband have my daughter since she was 3, they have abused my daughter for several years and I dont know what to do. Im working to get my girl home and have started to give her supplements that heals narsisistic abuse! This yourney is though! I wish Id never chase my twinflame for 3 years maybe I wouldve had my daughter home earlier….. what about hitting the narc and telling him the sex was bad etc. i treated him badly back at him I also spit in his face. He enjoyed it
can't get away. Soul is always inside that container you transferred it to whilst Loving. Living Truth is the only way (I completely experienced an invert with the Faith of Love when I listened to Ram Dass on conscious Living/ Dying
The narcissist was playing games and she wasn’t the first narcissist I had in my life so I’m pretty experienced with them. I blocked her for one week. She drove 40 miles to my house to put a note on the door. I figured well I’ll try and call her again so then I called her again and that little situation lasted may be another three weeks then I blocked her for two weeks so she would understand what’s going on and she came back around again now this time I’ve blocked her for two months and I don’t believe at all. I want anything to do with her again. Not at all she drinks uses pills and blows loud farts to me she’s useless.
Farting🤮🤢poop particals