7 Things Narcissists Do When You Go No Contact
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- Опубліковано 5 жов 2024
- What is the narcissists most likely to do when you go no contact?
DO they miss you?
Will they get in contact with you?
Will they try to hurt you?
After suffering two narcissistic relationships and personally aiding thousands of people through this critical stage of the recovery journey, I’ve witnessed time and time again the behavior that narcissists exert when people go No Contact with them.
In this Thriver TV episode I'm going to explain the 7 most common behaviours a narcissists exerts when you go no contact and I'm going to explain exactly what you need to do in each situation, for your own health, safety and to bring about the greatest opportunity for you to heal for real from abuse - once and for all.
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Pain of leaving is nothing compare to pain of staying..
spot on
Agreed.
Facts
Sometimes in a weak moment I wish things could've been different. But they never would cos he did NEVER own up to his mistakes. It was ALL MY FAULT. Bet he's sorry now. 👻👈😊😊😀
You're completely right. I needed to hear thos so badly. You summed it up perfectly!
A Russian proverb: The more quietly you go, the further you’ll get.
So true!
Absolutely
Good info
My new Russian friend, Simon, is helping me see the light in my relationship. He's a good kid.
Brilliant...
They move on to the next "victim"......they never look back.......they dont miss us...they miss what we gave them
You think.
They don't move on completely for the most part unfortunately. They will love bomb you again. As an attempt to get close to you again. Just so they can control and manipulate you all over again. So when you hear them say they miss you or what have you. That is what they are speaking of. They know that they don't miss you in the healthy way of a healthy person. So to speak.
Hi judy. I'd argue that the Narcissist is way worse off the actual victims. The victims are able to get wise and move on when they had enough abuse. However, the narcissist has a looong track history of failed relationships and are famously known to check on older supply. They stalk social media, send out offensive texts like "hi, how are you doing?" regardless how much they have hurt their victims. They are practically incapable of doing the hard work to self reflect and stop themselves from being what they are. They look back constantly to see if they can sneak back into people's lives. Think about that. That is the definition of insanity to keep doing the same thing and expecting different results. They are in a living hell that constantly repeats itself.
The first thing that the narcissist will do when we go no contact they will immediately go for the next supply cuz they're terrified of being alone abandoned. My ex narcissist girlfriend was my worst nightmare ever
@@ladennayoung2939 Unlike you'd having blocked me all together, how come she keeps it I can still leave message on voicemail and I can still text her? That's because I did nothing bad enough she to complain to those handful of my relatives she already knows. She's hoping I'm there when she decides to come back.
Narcissists never love you. They can't. They only miss the control they had over you when you get away. They never miss you. They can't. You will be replaced by another source of narcissistic supply. Guaranteed. Even if you can live alone and be OK with that, they can't. Don't look back. It's not worth it.
The perfect evidence of female narcissist vs. real woman. The real lady talks and she's rational in your face why she gives you the silent treatment. The female narcissist gives you the silent treatment with no explanation. It's also strange the female narcissist does not delete your phone number.
So true
💯💯💯💯
Absolutely.....they have no soul.......I compare mine to Asimo, the Honda robot.......don't miss her.....as there was nothing but a proto-human being to miss.
Do the narcs ever get that lonely feeling even if they always have new supply ?
When you finally free yourself of a narcissist it is the most liberating feeling in the world!!!!
It certainly is Kerri!! Keep thriving sweetheart xoxox
Agreed
Kerri Ann Anderson geah the menatl damage takes a while
So true
@@ybkbased1466 agreed i went from beening heart broken to beening angry not just at him but at the whole world n mostly myself
All these youtube vids about narcissists have been so important to me in this healing process
Yet you still look confuse on your pic lol
@@Noemie291 lol
Me too.
UA-cam was my therapy.
200th like.
For realsies though :)
Saved my life
I'm praying for all of us (the manipulated) to heal.
Amen
🙏💜
Amen. Thank you
Same to you xx
Thank you. Same to you too!
Only a victim can understand the pain of narcissistic abuse. You become numb, just totally numb.
Yes. Im numb
@@Lanika1979 Stay strong
@@julienromera7916 thank you
So true
Three years out - it gets better! 😊
My narc ex would never ask what he did wrong. he doesn't self reflect at all. everything is always the other persons fault.
Bella Zella yeah this was my story. She would always blame everyone else and if she did recognize what she did wrong, she would justify it by saying “I had good reason to do/say whatever I did so get over it.”
Bella Zella
this is literally me I’m so sick of it 😡 its always my fault never self reflects always calling me names and tries to hurt me. When i call him out on it he tries to blame me for other uncany shit. Ridiculous
dangboof Ass hole at its finest. Fuck him🖕🏼 you deserve better
Correct they have never done any mistake..yeah he used to msg I m sick when I call back he replies I will call later n disconnects my call
Yep! Like what the fuck?
Bottom line: Cut contact. Best revenge is BE HAPPY. They hate that. Literally.😂
Orphan ye. I just blocked him then he came with stories and then once again went back in his Fucker mode. I just sent him the last loving message and the last black widow kiss and blocked again. 😂 he will have to crawl 5 continents
C. Huseyin Good for you. Utilize situational awareness because he could become a stalker.
Yes!
Yeah when I cut mine off she got more violent !
I went to court the other day and I smiled at her !
And I got women all over the place I got 100,000 girlfriends here in LA I got a girlfriend in the Philippines I got a really nice girl in the Philippines.
I had wondered about how to hurt my ex the best way and I think you’re right no contact be quiet because she sure got pissed !
She got so mad she attacked me and I got put in jail for defending myself California laws are government sucks!
But in time I won the game!
This is good information though because you know it really hurt me deep down inside me and I was really fucked up it’s been almost 2 years and I’m still having emotional problems that’s the truth but you know I’ll never show you that I was on my smiling face
I just obtained a Permanent restraining order against him cuz he assaulted and harrassed me. Ill certainly be moving tf on👌👌
“Free at last, Free at last, Thank God Almighty, I am Free at last.” Being a slave to trying to please a narcissist, is an inner prison. I finally got a prison break....not going back there.
😆😆😆😆😆
I said the exact same thing when I was finally able to come up for air.lol I still refuse to date five years later.
That's me right now bruv!
Great way of putting it, it is emotional slavery
JFairhart 😂😂😂😂😂 I felt that
The narcissist has the ability to make the most solid, secure, confident person into a person who is insecure, beat down, and utterly completely devestated. They are that good at manipulation and what's worse, they enjoy that. Time and learning on this topic as well as NO CONTACT heals wounds.
Yup happened to me. Had 0 self doubts before but I had to deal with a bunch of trauma because of a narcissist. Luckily I'm back at like 95% fuctionality if that makes sense.
@@mkwlukas9241 keep rocking :)
I totally agree
Yup. I can attest to this comment.
This is what I feel right now, I was full of life before with my nex and now I am just an empty soul with no purpose of living
I’m only 23 days into this ‘No Contact’ I’ve been in this mess off and on for 3 years. I swear this is like counting days from your last drink
K O'Conner I absolutely relate!
@lucillelagasse Are narcissistic people bad?
Abhishek Bamanna I dont believe they are-they are going through something to that they might not be able to face/deal with.
Lol frfr
K O'Conner I feel the same way
After 8 years my narcissistic wife left me for a man 10 years younger thsn her, he was using her for sex and distanced himself when she wanted more, she came back to me but i had moved on, the next decade was spent dealing with her extreme behaviour as she tried to destroy me. Today i celebrate 14 years with my wonderful 2nd wife while my narcissistic ex is still alone and unloved..... karma.
That's nice to hear man, karma is taking a good care of such situations
Good for you, Dave!! 😍
Mine too...7 years ended with the most gorgeous child. He left us for a woman he married. He signed the marriage agreement along with signing off his parental rights. 9 years later when the wife left him he came back to meet HIS DAUGHTER and start again where we'd left off 🤣 NOT today sir! I have a birth certificate that says my daughter has no father and you don't get to play daddy when it fits your mood. She's 16 now he's snuck behind my back and tried to befriend her on Facebook where she quickly told him he was a bigger disappointment today than ever before in her life and she blocked him. He also sits alone in the misery he's created for himself and I like you sit with so much love and happiness giving my best friend Karma a big high five!!! Karma is incredible and always gets it so right!!! Enjoy that beautiful marriage you deserve ❤
@@staciemarie5859 lovely words, thank you.
@@luptonwell Your welcome Dave.
They do not like it when we take our power back and go no contact. They know that they’ve lost at the little game they were playing with us. Stay strong, never go back to the vomit.
Yeah, my sister accused me of being a narcissist. I started to believe it after receiving NO CONTACT. I went in therapy for two years but neither my psychologist, neither my psychiatrist. gave me this diagnose. Meanwhile my sister is doing the smear campagne against me towards my own family. So when i ask them how my sister is doing, they treat me like a psychopath or a stalker...I mean hello??? And i have developed a Pure OCD because of that. So basically i convinced myself i am a monster. Everything i do or say i doubt. Just wanna say that this NO CONTACT can also be abused and can be very damaging if used to easily. Don't get me wrong: i don't know your personal experience so please don't take it personal.
@@user-lc2zi4dl2oif you’re worried that you may be a narcissist, and you’re worried that your family thinks you’re a narcissist, then you’re not a narcissist. It seems like your sister may be one, though.
I like that comment 😁
Can you help further... About going no contact..!!
People like them will grow old by themselves because the people they hurt will no longer be around always remember what goes around comes back around
Yup! It's TRUE I work in a nursing home,the ones that are stubborn and nasty,are the ones with no visitors..and clearly states in their file estranged from family.
@Jennifer Turi GOD LOVES YOU AND YOUR HEART WILL HEAL. SENDING LOVE PEACE HAPPINESS AND PROSPERITY TO YOU. GET BACK TO DOING THE THINGS YOU ONCE LOVED TO DO LIKE HOBBIES GO OUT SIDE GET SUN LIGHT GO TO A PARK BEST WISHES.
@Jennifer Turi seek professional counselling and spend time doing all the things that make you feel happy.
I find that spending time outdoors in the beauty of Mother Nature helps me and also listening to a lot of music relaxes me too.
Wishing you all the best. Things can and will improve, it just takes time xxoo
Exactly.
@Jennifer Turi - you took the words out of my mouth. However we have to forgive them to heal our own broken selves. Because unforgiveness leads to feelings of resentment and hatred which like acid corrode the vessel which contain it.🙏
"Stop trying to fix and heal crazy people... Heal any triggers that come up within you!"
Well Said.
Thanks for saying that, that is exactly is the issue
Right
When the Narc replaced me, I immediately prayed for the new supply. Then, I screamed Hallelujah! 🤸🏾♂️
Amourex de la vie Muah don't worry, people do see through the Narc... They do leave. My ex... He's getting older and older. His destiny is to die alone, no kids no, future. He wants to live forever. That's fine. He'll be FOREVER ALONE
👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿 right? How about when they try to “rub” the new girl on your face to provoke jealousy 🤣
@@arxsyn serme koi moni nthi magti aapne hmna byhane psisa ne video ditho teni vat karu chi te mne nthi aapiyo bthne mli gyo srr me aapne mar vise bthu lkhi ne aapiyu 6 aavo bnnjna mulkat thya me jya sku tem nthi elsesepachho khoyu boli mne bhu chid mara pasn no jvab naapiyo okser thankyo
@@arxsyn yes! Mine told me he needs to conserve his energy. Lives with my much younger friend now, (who he had been grooming for years) and considers his passion to be like the embers of the fire; dying, but still super hot. He actually told me this! while telling me that i am still his favorite person, and maybe we can go on vacation together! Time for this 'friendship' to end. Contact ZERO.
I’m currently Waiting to be replaced ... helpppppp 😅😂 he’s driving me nuts
Hell no. .being with a narcissist is so bad when I left I didn't miss anything, wasn't curious about anything. .I ran and never looked back.
Amen
Crystal Wilson well said.
You’re a strong woman, probably raised up right.
Holographic Multiverse hey what’s a not true victim to you? You the narcissistic abuse victim gatekeeper?
Seriously fuck you
@Holographic Multiverse 😂 "Might turn into a block of salt" 😂
7 things narcissists do summarized:
1. may express that they’ve already ended the relationship
2. make contact with you about random things
3. may appear to take full responsibility and be accountable and rectify all the things that you continually bring to their attention that were unlivable for you
4. may use other people by proxy to deliver their message of redemption to you
5. may have a tragedy or an issue that they try to get you back with through sympathy or guilt
6. may do terrible things to trigger you and get your attention
7. move on and replace you with new supply
This really worries me, I think I might be narcissistic I dont want to be like this what should i do??
@@lebraviouswilliamsthe3rd305 hey, if you become self aware and are willing to better yourself, you don't have a lot to worry about. while i'm no kind of expert, therapy could do you good. also, if you look up dr. ramani's channel, it could help you since she's an expert on narcissim and i'm pretty sure she's made content to help narcissits who want to change/be better.
best of luck!
@@justyourlittlestar I really appreciate it.
@@lebraviouswilliamsthe3rd305 it’s rare fir a narcissist to admit who they are. If you truly are, then I congratulate you for noticing! That’s the first step, next look for a therapist! Good luck
Thanks
Finding out they were a narcissist was extremely painful and devastating. My whole reality changed and suddenly everything made sense. It was very painful to find out there was a reason for all those sad/confused feelings I had whenever I dealt with them. I always thought it was me doing something wrong. It was painful and devastating, but liberating at the same time.
dangboof same. i never knew about narcissists or this kind of abuse. then i started dating a guy who did all this to me and it fucked me up so bad i even attempted suicide and ended up in a psych ward and it was only then that i realized i was not the problem and as soon as i got out, i immediately cut him out of my life and i feel sooo much better. i can’t believe a person can do things like that to push people to such suffering, but now i know.
Serene dude that's EXACTLY what I'm feeling in this moment
The revelation was painful and devastating for me too. As you wrote everything suddenly made sense. The constant confusion and questioning myself stopped.
@dangboof I also had a misunderstending what narcissism is. Lately I heard there are more kinds but I always thought narcissism is more visible even for people who haven't met narcissist before. By the time I recognizd that my ex's beheviour was bad but I was already in it under control and I excused it with his difficult past. I had no idea that all that was a manifestation of a narcissist or sociopath.
dangboof could
Sometimes narcs think others are narcs
juan oleee! So TRUE! and declare themselves to be "empaths" !
@@darlalong3097 my ex husband to T.
Me X husband spot on
Lol true
haha
Thank you! Narcs HATE to be in their homes ALONE. I've seen it over and over. They are petrified of seeing their "true self" in the mirror. They always have to be on the go..talking n boo hooing to ANYONE who is willing to listen. Just awful! Stay strong! Praying for all of you.
I got a couple videos of it. Terrifying...
@@nathanhatchservices1460 what's ur email
Narcs hate themselves
To your point. My ex a 46 mother and teacher sent me a text the first day last summer in which her kids were with the dad and she had a month off it read.... The kids are gone you can call whenever you want. I though it was so strange at the time. I mean she's saying things I already knew. Anyway she calls an hour latter drunk and talks for 3 hours about nothing. It's true even a little time be herself drove her nuts. When she got the kids back she didn't act as needy.
@@tylerdurden2626 Absolute truth! 💯
This is so true ! Never go back it never gets better the sad part about these videos are most of us only see this after the damage is done
So true
You can say that again. Thank goodness the universe has law's absolutely nobody is above.
Right very true ‼️💯
if i had a super power it would be hindsight
When i met my narc i thought that she was the best thing that ever happened to me. Now... i realize that actually, NO CONTACT is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Freedom.
Mine have our four month old daughter. Makes me sick I got her pregnant now
Female covert narcs are dangerous. After going through it 21 years ago with my son's mom I met another on eharmony who I dated for 4 months. I walked before the discard, her behavior when she thought she had me under control didn't pass my bullshit meter. Pathetic little bitch.
@@DailyBootCampLLCFayetteville be prepared-shell use your kid to get at you. Hope for your sanity she finds and marries someone else. Mine did and cheats on him. He has no clue.
@@tylerdurden2626 ouch
I'm almost 2 years no contact with a permanent restraining order. I've never been happier!! I have a new man in my life who loves & respects me & my kids. Life is wonderful!
I would do anything to say those words
What made you get a restraining order ? What was he doing ? Whatever he did You think every narcissist does the same thing after leaving & going no contact ?
Congrats.. hope i can do that someday..
I envy your court system! 3 years after leaving him (15 years of hell marriage), we share kids that he abandoned but court is constantly “looming” so the 2 weeks prior to yet another court date or when his life sucks, he contacts again (and current court orders are in effect so I’m stuck gray rocking- which has been traumatic and triggering-so I have no choice at the point to truly go no-contact, yet).
2019- my health has been damaged bc of his abuse and I’m standing up and ending it. Jan 7 is a big day~ the judge is going to see if he paid up support as well as change our orders. If he didn’t pay, he goes to jail. When the court orders get changed- I’m filing for no contact to me and solely supervised visits for him.
Prayers please! His abuse is physically mentally and financially killing me and our two kids (such he is charged with criminal abandonment of).
If on Jan 7 (3 YEARS after the kids and I left), if the judge fails us again I’m requesting a change in judge AND state venue (since we live in another state now). The state our case is in absolutely should have marked this as domestic violence but they have ignored it. The state I’m in now doesn’t recognize DV other than physical DV- so DV charges are a loss anyway.
3rd time is the charm- meaning the 3rd year is our END. It’s time.
That’s amazing 🙌
I ran and never looked back. He was the shepherd of Satan.
I did no contact. I sold my condo to get away than moved into a security building for a year. I met a good caring man and I'm getting married at 42 this Valentine's day. I can't believe I wasted 9 years on a narc
Sheila Martin Congratulations to you and yours! 🌈♥️ I’m so happy for you.
😂😂😂😂
That's bc they're literally possessed. Yes they are.
Ain't the the truth. Stay blessed. 🕊❤🌈☄
No contact, silence, dignity = saved my sanity, rebuild life
Yes, that should be done. We should try to save ourselves. These narcs can go to any cheaper levels. Best is no response!!! May God help kind people. May God saves us n bless us.
1 year of no contact and life has been amazingly peaceful and stress free for the first time in 6 years. Videos like this are wonderful reminders for me to stay away. I love myself too much now to fall again. Thank you.
You are so welcome Natasha. I am so glad these videos help. Love and continued blessings dear lady. xoxox
“To a narcissist you are an object performing a role. There is no one home to really, genuinely love themselves, let alone another. You are simply the being who offers up enough energy to take them away / self medicate them from their own traumas” *
*Approximately 16:30-16:49
This is brilliant. Thanks :)
Thank you Carmen, I am so pleased this resonated and helps. xoxox
That resonated here, too!
"There is no one home," is the most elegant summary of the whole deal. If a narcissist leaves you for someone else, it's not only not about you, it's not even about their new "love" of choice -- it's all about them. It always is. Everything. Always.
I couldnt WAIT until my ex-narcissist found a replacement...cause then he would leave me alone. 7yrs later he still hasnt CONNECTED with anyone (go fig) and still pops up in my texts every once in awhile. The key for me has been:
1. Call him out and tell him about his TRUE self ("I know you are insecure and teying to bait me with sob stories...")
2. I moved on, got help, grew emotionally, and am in a healthy stable relationship
3. I did research on narcissism and how to spot it and protect myself from it
4. Forgave HIM and MYSELF. He had a crazy upbringing and a fragile ego, I got that. It doesn't excuse his actions towards me but it gave me insight into him. And as for myself...i had to forgive ME for allowing that fool in my heart. For believing what hebsaid and not what did/didnt do.
he wins any time he gets a reaction out of you good or bad
Mine found two replacements and still kept harassing me. At first I was relieved thinking I would be free. It took so much for me to learn how to protect my own freedom. Then I felt bad for the people he replaced me with.
Or...change your number
Bravo to you and your clarity ..... forgiveness can be the single most difficult aspect to confront after experiencing this evil abuse. By educating yourself about the intricacies of NPD, it is possible to arrive at a point of empathy for someone that must have endured such childhood cruelty that created the adult monster we all came in contact with out of what we thought was truth.
Moreover, forgiving yourself for not recognizing this in the beginning is a testament to your true being and that you are not afraid to show vulnerability or fear intimacy. Self forgiveness is one of the very last steps anyone can take towards complete healing. By your comment, you've done well. If I may, I'll leave you with a response I've used when the hoovering events come my way and that is to respond to those text messages with "Not today Satan" or "No thanks, I'm not signing up for another trip to Crazy Town, feel free to invite someone else, bye bye". If you feel compelled to respond at all, its best to try using any number of GREY ROCK methods so as to provide absolutely nothing of interest to fuel the narc's tank when they are running low on supply. By doing this, you will arrive at a point where it can become a little game for you to win at each time it occurs. God bless you and remember you are worthy of a better life so make one for yourself by keeping your head high and your story will improve along the way!
A V sounds like my ex. Still healing from it.
As someone who sees a lot of these narcissistic tendencies in myself. I ask that you all pray for my true healing. I don’t want to continue to be this way. Thank you for this eye opening video 🙏🏾
Some ofnit can be you mirroring there behavior. Just questioning yourself if your a narc usually means your not.
@@nancythornton2947 i hope so, i came out of a relationship with a girl who would often use fear tacticts to get me to "behave" and withhold sex from me too. One night i accidentally nudged her and she woke up and shouted cuss words at me...i did question if i was the narcisist because i felt do beat down and numb.
Thankyou for your honesty.
We all have *some* narcissistic tendencies. It's... normal. Who doesn't like their ego to be stroked, or to be validated? Nothing wrong with that, UNTIL you start manipulating people for your own benefits. That, and of course, narcissists don't give anything back either. It's a one-way street situation and you are walking against incoming traffic permanently. There is no end to the pain... except leaving.
Narcissistic behavior of one's partner has somewhat scared the hell out of me because they don't care about our feelings. They are only thinking of themselves and what hurts the most is you're the one to take all the blame even if you haven't done anything wrong in the relationship.
When a person truly loves you, they put your happiness and well being above all else. Narcy's are chameleons. They can only IMITATE intimacy, caring and emotions but never actually FEEL or CARE about anyone else. If you are into fake love, fake partnership and never having a soulful connection with a partner, stay with your narcy and feed them all your real love and watch it being sucked into the black hole where their heart should be.
LoveMe,com how did you know about my relationship with my ex partner
And
Lacie Elizabeth Newell
She tried to turn it all back on me it was all my fault what a joke I was terribly hurt by these two people both of them bad news but on the brighter side there is a really great side to the story you’re kind of cute too !
LoveMe,com I hope everything gets bigger better what a trip this is been I gave so much love and it got spun around and I'm the worst thing since sliced bread I thought I was at fault I thought I was the bad guy till I started doing these forms and listening I'm going no contact day one can't do this no more they're in discard and give me a little bit s in pieces you go right out of your mind you think it's your fault but it doesn't got to move on I've learned so much in these forms thank you too keep moving on for the right person what a tough life is turned out to be but I have faith God bless you
John Larson Same thing happened to me !
It got really dark for a while I actually thought of suicide I never understood suicide before but I do now.
There was one day of clarity when I saw a dark tunnel and a bright light at the end of the tunnel .
Today I’m clearheaded and I’m stepping through the light at the end of the tunnel and everything is wonderful and I met a beautiful girl I think is the most beautiful girl in the world actually and she is not narcissistic
I went through hundreds of girls to find the one all of a sudden it just happened dating on the Internet really sucks and you never know who you’re going to meet up in a real life either !
Keep going forward thank positive put sticky notes up of what you think a relationship is supposed to be and how you wanna live your life !
Remember other people or pulling for you to recover and live the life that you dreamed that you should live ‘
@@brokenlibrary2591 and yet I can't but feel sorry for them ... they were not born, they were
made... that is why empaths like me seem to attract them I guess...
I met my first Narc about 4 months ago... whew! I never knew anything like this even existed! this guy is a text book Narcissist, he literally did everything in the exact order that the professionals suggested. I thought I was crazy at first, like "what the heck is wrong with this dude?", but after careful review and lots of research, I confirmed that he is a Narc. he would literally wait until during sex and ask questions like "are you cheating on me", "are you seeing other men?", I would say no and ask him the same and he would yell "DONT ASK ME ANY QUESTIONS!!!" , or if I asked him anything he would tell me that I don't have the right to ask him anything. I waited to one day after we had sex and he thought we were in a good place and I was so sweet to him then I went home and BLOCKED HIM FROM EVERYTHING! I'm pretty sure he is trying to contact me or maybe not! either way I don't care! best decision ever. I can't imagine anyone putting up with this behavior for years. 4 months drained the shit out of me. I pray for anyone not strong enough to break free. May God protect your state of mind!
Amen!
I also went through this in just several months. Now I believe I'm lucky not having sex with crazy female narcissist. Six months ago she said she loves me. Six months later it's what's the meaning of love.
I was dumb but she was good at hiding her tail. I was with her for 2 years. When i kicked the leach out she punched me and put me in a headlock because i grabbed the garage opener. I just smiled as she called the cops saying im mentally and physically abusing her because i call her out on her bullshit. She said Im killing people on the streets she said. The cops laughed and asked who has he killed.
Yeap glad I found this channel. Dated this guy for almost 6 months this past weekend while he was sleeping I took his phone and checked all his text messages from different women he was talking to smh then on top of that I found naked pics of his ex wife who he had sex with. I confronted him and he said he did cause he felt that he owed her something. He was sending pics to a bunch of women talking about how he wanted to get with them telling them he was horny. He even got with one girl that was his friend. I was so disgusted specially after seeing naked pics of his ex on the phone. He was into his looks lying, cheating you name it. Then he has the audacity to get on his knees to apologize acting like he was crying with one fake ass tear. I told his ass leave don’t call me or text me. It hurt but I’m glad God opened my eyes. He deceived me but I learned my lesson. Not stressing cause God got my back and what goes around comes around!!!
@@charlesadams4487 I’ve read your other comments. None of them contain a single, tangible thought or idea.
The name Charles Adams suggests that you are an Anglophone, but your English is a is abysmal. My guess is that English is not your first language. If it is, life must be a struggle.
You either a cretin that enjoys trolling people who are seeking information and support, or you are simply just sick in the head. Either way, that makes you sick in the head.
I’ll offer a Hail Mary third option which describes you as someone that might need to go back and try to comprehend what a narcissist actually is/is not.
@@cubistisimo kinda harsh but I get ur frustration with people who cannot form a cohesive sentence. It's everywhere these days!
Married one..and I just found out that I’m not crazy for feeling how I feel and this is truly a thing!
Trust me.....my family just told me I saved myself from marrying one! Im sorry
Why will you be! You are not Crazy! Don’t buy it! Don’t think it! They are the ones that are CRAZY
I married 2 the las one was worse (“better at it”) recently I stop contact is been a couple of weeks since he’s last text trying to make me feel “crazy “. (We have a child together 😩) I’m waiting 😒 for the storm, I hope not because it won’t end up good for him NO MORE😘
Girl me too! I left his narcissistic ass! It took me almost 3 years of marriage to fully see is narc ways. He hid it and brought it into our marriage little by little over time. It’s such a sad thing for a person to be that way……::::
Celeste Delano. My best advice is to get out A.S.A.P because they get worse overtime .
Feel like a heroin addict right now.... It's the worst feeling in the world
It is MA M, please consider joining me in the free healing workshop so you can find some relief from all of this ...
www.melanietoniaevans.com/freewebinar Love and blessings to you xoxo
Same here
How are you feeling now xx
Same on day 2 of no contact I feel sick. I miss who he portrayed to be but have to face the reality that he doesn’t exist.
Yeah, same..it’s the same feeling only worse...
Each time I broke the No Contact, within less hours I got back to the battle grounds. And was each time coming out in a worse state of mind, emotions and health!
Thank you very much for your great videos! 💞
There were numerous signs (open hand!) what he would do to me like slander, gossip, destroying my reputation etc etc from the very first weeks on!
One question: is it so that the longer one has been in narcissist' relationships, the longer is the healing process to last? I guess so as the formations of the synapsis is a whole lot different over time, yes?
Hi Dorina,
I'm so glad to help love. The answer is, not necessarily. Someone who has been exposed to a narcissist for a longer period of time has taken significant damage but they also might also become aware of a lot of what those relationships are really about. It really is a matter of self-awareness.
You are right, the patterns of behaviour and in the interactions between the two really show what it is we are trying to source through the other in the relationship. When we stop trying to get the other person to give us what we need and learn to give this to ourselves then we can detach from the narcissist and move forward in our lives.
This does require teaching ourselves new things and changing our patterns. But it's not actually not hard to do and it doesn't need to take a long time to do it.
Love and blessings xoxox
Yes, I can understand. Still in a relationship with him, still so in line, still hurting every day. And he keeps asking 'what's happened for you to be upset about? ' I don't know why I am unable to walk away. I really thought I was strong.
I’m 135 days no contact. Thank you for the video
My pleasure Nrg, you are doing great!! xoxox
Good well done
Continued success to you stay strong and focused
"If I take care of other people who are sick and broken, they will have the resources to love me." WOW what a lightbulb moment this was for me
The most under-rated comment on the youtube!
Not always true. Some narcs will never look back especially if they know the damage they did was too severe.
agree. I know of my Ex Narc that he NEVER tried to reconcile with his ex or tried to hoover her. He just went on looking for new supply.
Facts. To walk away from someone after treating them like that and witnessing the damage u caused is evil. God sees it all karma is something u never want to entertain.
I believe I did a good job delivering the replacement message. I do believe she sabotaged one of my old associates then triangulated me as the side piece. Regardless I'm safe now and comfortable with peace. I'm doing the work of cutting them off with boundaries and consequences.
No. Some don't even know what they have done. They never look back becoz they never cared for you.
Video starts @4:15
thanks! :)
Good looking out
Thank you!!!
Also the vid says 7 Things, but it's actually 6; she skipped number 4.
Thing 2 @6:03
Thing 3 @8:26
Thing 5 @11:19
Thing 6 @13:41
Thing 7 @16:00
Catweasle thank goodness. She can talk forever about nothing. Defriending wtf?!
Thank you!
I woke up at 3:30 in the morning to listen to this...did not know what led me here but i believe it is my spirit guide 🌹
If you wake up at 3:00 a.m. repeatedly, God is trying to get your attention ...... research.
Your brain Is fucked up, stop saying things you don't even know. Jeez.
May they protect you! ❤️💯
It's witching hour also. I'm the same. I believe my guide was waking me up to tell me that it's now I needed to watch this. Wer on this path to get onto a better one as rough as it is. We will get there ❤️
The Holy Spirit led me here also🙏🏿🙏🏿
The best way to deal with narcissists is to go no contact and cut them off. Don't engage with them on any level, if you can. Don't engage in the games they play to try to get you to respond. Get up and walk out of the room, like you haven't heard them or saw
them.
best comment
Lol! I did this at work and lost my job, but it was a blessing!
What if you have a no contact order with them but they got you pregnant during the order and it’s still in place? I want to keep him out of my life forever and fear what he would tell my daughter about me. But is it right to do that to my daughter? It seems like a piece of trash like this doesn’t deserve to know her but I’m afraid she will be mad at me for keeping her safe from his manipulative ways. He was even physically violent and a recovered alcoholic that began drinking again and going crazy on me
I’m in so much pain. I hope all is well with everyone.
I hope your doing good now
It's the first time for me I didn't even know what a narc was until now
Sina I encourage you to ask your friends and family members for their support. Take good care of yourself xxoo
I hope you’re doing better now 💛
I got love bombed like a mofo, got discarded, then after all that she comes back and hoovers 2 days later 👀 and I had to run her off it was weird
while she was gone she was sleeping with other men so she left for 2 days haveing sex with other men then tried to come back wtf lol
I wouldn't take her back I deleted my Facebook account cut all ties blocked all numbers the day she left
I feel like im going threw withdraws from being with her 😔
Well at least I know what a narc is now this is my first one and it only lasted 6 weeks she had me fooled but never again I will see the red flags next time
This video made me so emotional. So much of this resonates directly to my experience. I spent so long in emotional turmoil not understanding what I was doing wrong and why I wasn’t enough. I believed that he was hurt and damaged and needed me. All the while he was a pathological and malignant narcissist... I fell for every trick and went through the entire cycle and manipulation. Then once I discovered videos explaining the nature of a narcissist it literally mirrored all the behaviours he showed and all the trauma I went through. It isn’t easy trying to move on, but it’s such a weight off my shoulders to know that I can stop blaming myself, that I can stop asking why I wasn’t enough and why he did the things he did, that I can stop thinking it’s possible to love him better, that I can stop dreaming every night about him, thinking everyday about him and what’s he doing, that I can realise what I thought was true unconditional love, is actually just psychological manipulation, it’s horrible and it hurts but now I know the truth and i can start to heal my broken heart, confidence and Spirit .
Everything you said was my life down to a T i used to think it was me but once we got back to second time n he was worse that's when i found out it was never me with the problem it was always him n my heart goes out to he's next victim it's been 8 months since i left n even now I'm still angry at myself for putting me n my daughter in the position for 2 years of hell
I pray that you heal I went through the same you are enough. You're more than enough I hope you find true love
Hannah what you wrote about is all I been feeling the last 7 months. I am thankful for this video and your detailed post. Yes, it is great we have these videos and comments. This makes us feel that we are not alone and that we deserve happiness.
Your story mirrors my story. Stay strong.
Amen!!!! I'm right with you!!!! You can do it and i can to🤩🤩🤩
It took 50 years to realize my mother was a narcissist. As a child I knew something wasn't right but wasn't sure what. She wasn't like the other kid's moms...As far back as I could remember, that woman tortured me/ignored me, called me ugly, you name it. I guess I blocked it out. Now, I am in a relationship with a narcissist 😢 I wonder if most women raised by a narc end up with one....Imagine that 😵😵😵
Kari Short I know exactly what you're saying, such a mind fk... hugs to you!!!!
Kari Short yup
Kari Short yes, we tend to gravitate in relationships to narcs or vice verse. It’s a learned behavior that we attract that feels oddly right because it’s what we know. When the heavy lifting of healing is complete, you’ll spot a narc before they say “hello”
Kari Short Same here. I used to believe that I was “making my boyfriends act that way.” A belief my Mother was all too keen to validate. 🤮 After reading “Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents,” it was as if my burden of guilt had finally been lifted. I have zero desire to be sucked back into the world of cognitive dissonance, the controlling, the chaos through lies, fantasy and identity/reputation destruction. I have never been more grateful to be AWAY.
Alicia Meeks I am on my way back across the map tomorrow. I left him once bc of his tantrums. He talked me into coming back and it was the worst mistake of my life! I can literally feel my skin ripping off tonight as I just now experienced the final discard him telling me to leave and he'll give me $500 to go. I am so mad at my dumb ass self I can't even see straight! Omg. Ugh. I'm in hell all over again!
I'm actually thankful for the comment sections of all these narcissist videos on UA-cam. This community teaches me a lot.
I have cried so much before this awareness.. now I don't cry as much. Thank you. *virtual hug*
They don't know what is love, even after loving them so dearly, help them financially, working for them is of no good. Only God can heal them
@Aish Zahida Rightly said, they have waged a war against God and they are till today waging a war without any remorse, against his creation, whom he made in his image and likeness. I can discern on their behaviour, whenever I see them.
I guess its true. Thats my ex husband😢
Well, God made them that way..........not clear he will heal them!!!
@@bernardbeaudreau7330 No God did not make them that way. They turned themselves into a narcissist as a child, they went inside themselves, and made themselves a false person, no God had absolutely nothing to do, with turning them into demons, straight from the pits of Hell!
Please don’t blame God, for these horrible creatures.
@Lovers of the lost narc Some of most nasty narcs I’ve encountered actually proclaim they Love God and are religious. When in reality they don’t... they just use that religious mask to justify themselves. I’m so glad I caught that in 3 months with guys I was dating they are so self absorbed and passive aggressive in the name of Jesus.... lol
Only one mantra with Narcs: "Maintain" No contact.
Dont act on your 'urges' instead listen n follow own inner voice.
Thanks a lot! Really.
I say narcissists are like having a pet tiger without a cage.
JoJoZep ofthejungle well put!
Most narcs don't eat humans. You know some really scary narcs.
Thats an insult to Tigers
WOW!!! Very well said.
Tigers are loving and gentle and don’t eat or attack their loved ones. Narcissists are evidence that vampires are real.
I broke no contact after 18 months, thinking he loved me and wanted us to work. I began speaking with him regularly, keeping my guard up and after another year and 6 months of courting I made the mistake of moving back in with him. Biggest mistake of my life. He showed me that I had only had a TASTE of who he really was. After one week of living together he unleashed. Needless to say I got out and I thank God everyday. I have been no contact for three weeks now and pray for strength.
Keep strong Tanya. If you would like to know more about how to heal from the Narcissistic abuse I would love you to connect to my free resources to help you hun www.melanietoniaevans.com/freecourse You will receive a daily email full of support and information, two free ebooks one on How to do No Contact and an invitation to the webinar, in which you will get to experience a Quanta Freedom Healing for yourself. Love and blessings to you xoxox
Melanie Tonia Evans Thank you so much for all that you do to help people get better after the ordeal. The narc will do a number on you but it's always helpful when we get the support of others who have been there before. Thank you and please keep putting your message out there! You are saving lives! God bless you!!
Tanya Eatmon i am reading this three weeks out from your comment, and i hope its been another 3 weeks of no contact! Stay strong lovely :)
Tanya Eatmon:
You go girl!!!! I mean it too... go out on the town, go get your hair done, go on vacation or just to the theater or wherever!!!! You keep YOU too busy for the likes of HIM, and you will find a strength you never new you had!
Start doing all the things that YOU LOVE and HE HATES. Especially change your hairstyle to one he can't stand, and change your clothing style. As you become happier being you again, girl, you will forget about him. The trick here is for you to deliberately become a woman he would never accept, and to always remember that fact!!!
Men are terrified of change, even little ones, women grab the bull by the horns and shake the shit out of it at a moment's notice! Pick about three HUGE, LIFE CHANGING things that you've always wanted to do, preferably things he hates, and just add them to your life a little more each day, until finally, they are as much a part of your daily routine as breathing is.
Make damn sure his friends know about it and tell him all about you. Let him squirm, not having control over your choices anymore!!!! Enjoy the no contact as you become your own self.
I've been where you are. Believe me, he doesn't love you, he loves controlling you, berating and belittling you, embarrassing you... As he helplessly watches you get over him from the side lines, unable to wipe the smile off your face and make you cry again, owning you, he will blow a gasket every time someone name drops you. Yours is to make sure that your friends do that constantly, and laugh at him like giddy school girls as he throws his hissy fits. Hell have them video it, put it up on several social sites and then make sure he gets the links!!!!
Good luck to you!!!!
Brianna Irene thank you so much for your encouragement! Still no contact, Praise God!! I have thought about it because he started his smear campaign but I'm not letting him win. I have my life back and I am happy again and I am SAFE!
I left and never looked back...absolutely no contact and my life is so much better now.
You know you've just had an interesting life experience when you find yourself in this corner of the internet :)
Thank you Melanie, you're giving hope and saving souls with your work.
Thank you Stephen and you are spot on!! Thrive on Dear One xoxox
When they ghost you, it’s sort of makes you do crazy things that they would usually do, you really have to snap out of it
Wow! I'm glad you shared that because I felt the same way. He ghosted after telling me he didn't want to be with me anymore because he just didn't feel like it (after 4 years). I did things that I normally don't do like spam texted him one night and got so mad (i typically don't let myself get so mad). He ended things by telling me that he felt I was restrictive (I'm a strong believer in independence) and I had crossed a line by spam texting him that night (he has spam CALLED me several times in the past). I now feel like he was projecting his actions onto me to make me feel guilty. I know I have flaws but he was rarely willing to talk about our issues in order to find a resolution. I miss him still but I know it was toxic for me. I had broken up with him several times throughout the years but I always took him back after his apologies. This was his first and final break up towards me and he didn't forgive me despite having humiliated myself by practically begging him to not end things. Perhaps it was for the best though. It's hard to let go
Moxiegirl what did you do? It’s been almost 2 months and I cry daily! No one understands so I cry in my car or cry myself to bed... it hurts
Libra Nish ....I’m sorry hun same here
@@libralove2471 so sorry, good days bad days hun..I get it
dwilloughby13 its been 2 months here to, i have never felt so sad and lonley. Why do i miss him.. why :( i almost wanted to call him Today but i didnt ..i hate this feeling.
I fell in love with someone that I had no clue was a narcissist. The charm that they show you at first, how much fun they can be, it totally distracts you from what is really going on. Of course i picked up signs along the way that she had issues and needed to look inward. I am dealing with my own co dependent issues that have been hard wired into me since i was a child. So for my experience, i went back and forth with this one person trying to get them to look inward so that she could learn to love me again. They play games, they manipulate, they know it hurts you and they get some kind of sick enjoyment from it. From experience, if you are in this cycle, stop making excuses and get out. You can not change how they act, and you also cant take it personally and blame them. As hard as that sounds because they constantly hurt you. But you need to realize they are acting and behaving based off of the only way they know how to act at THIS POINT IN TIME. It is possible that one day they will go through an experience that will humble them more and make them look back and realize how much pain they cause to people. But it is not for you to figure out, and not your responsibility. It is theirs. Good luck everyone, next focus: BEING HAPPY.
Me also. Sadly because we were engaged when he dumped me like a trash. Now he's coming back like nothing happened. And he even told me his problems with his new girlfriends 😱.. now I really did my best to go no contact .. Thanks God.
Ian Brown so true, thank you for sharing.
Ian Brown going through the same thing right now
Thanks ian!
Went thru something very similar well after being cheated on beaten & sexually violated & after he stole from me our relationship ended on a horribly sour note & he did irreversible damage this was nearly 4 years ago & it changed me in ways Im not comfortable explaining but yeah Narcs tend to Charm Thee Holy Hell outta you before they abuse, use & violate you!!
I decided to give up on him after 8 months. He is really an empty person.
Something that has helped me tremendously is keeping a list of the things he did to hurt me. So, whenever I would feel the urges to go back , I would just revisit that list to remind myself once more that there is nothing for me in this relationship. Maybe this tip could help you also.
Stay safe.
I'm doing the same thing
@Nonew Paige Only time will tell
@Nonew Paige I really don't think I'll want to do it to myself. Life goes on.
Ura it does because I always try to make excuses and forget the hurt
thank you ! i needed this
My ex got me to look like I was a narrcist. Twisted everything around to where i did not know who i was and fully belived I was the problem. I then realized there are no satisfying her and she used her high expectations to dangle for me to meet. i hit her up hurt because i was lonely still giving into her ways. Now i am 3 days strong moving forward the best i can in life.
3 days strong myself. I see it all now.
@@tracysedman9007 Keep it going Tracy. Best to jusy stay away and know one day you will be loved by someone who truly loves you.
It’s hard, I am facing it right now. Narcissistic feeds from the information we provide as in we open up to them about ourselves. We give in, we are only objects to them. My ex was full of shit. At one point I stop giving in the relationship. I questioned myself what the heck is going on ?? Why isn’t she sharing anything from her past to me. This was the reason why the relationship ended it. So please don’t call your ex at all. Last time, she told me she needed a nice guy where he does everything for her then she love bombs with manipulative tactics. Plus my ex was so insecure and jealous. I’m glad I started therapy right away. It hurts but it gets better. Keep on moving, work on yourself be the best for you. Some how she will contact you eventually then you will make the right choice.
@@zshanoorani You are so right about them refusing to share ANYTHING from their pasts! My current boyfriend is a narc, I'm in the process of distancing and cutting all ties, and in the beginning he would expect me to tell him EVERYTHING about my past. He's asked weird questions about my past sexual encounters and everything. Then I realized why, so he could throw these things in my face any chance he gets. I'm a recovering addict with FOUR+ YEARS clean and I thought I could trust him and told him things that I've never told anyone and it hurts so deep when he throws it in my face. That shit isn't love. 💔💯 He's a MAJOR Narcissist. Ticks every single box! Huge on gaslighting.
@@zshanoorani me to!!! I stopped giving and helping period. me and her dated then WE MOVED IN TOGETHER,note we both came into the relationship with kids.
but she was under this impression that I was going to handle all of the financials while she got to keep hers then I stopped.
I was like hell naw,then tried to make me care more for her and her kid and just wanted me to discard mine.
these demons are a trip,then she had the nerve to tell me what to do with my kid and how to parent my kid.
my kid was 7 at the time while hers was literally 2months old. so yea she was looking for some dude to take her in and cater to her stankin ass.
pssh! not I, I rather be by my lonesome. I've spent so much time with me that it doesn't bother me to be alone.
I mastered alone time unlike narcs. run from one person to the next.
she told me her baby dad was 💩 so I reached out to him on fb and gave him our address and he came to see his son even took him sometimes. the bxtch got mad at me.
you made his dad look like shit and the dad was nothing like she described,then it dawned on me that me and her was just her trying to punish him.
bxtch dont use me as a pawn in your childish games. get a life you no life low life. & nothing she had she obtained on her own. her grandparents did everything for her
got her a car and a job and this itch was high on a pedestal like she was better than others.
NARCs: I love you = I love that you love me, and they operate on I-HATE-YOU-DON’T-LEAVE-ME!
Sick`! ¥
So true
Tme btha gmeochhu pasachu vat lkhi6 ma6varsthi karbla gyagti tya gi pen kilyar leti tema maro khorak bnth thyo maro kkhasi oathrs thgya me bhu levigya ne drpar aavi dva kati to chkryhyagya pagma gthnma jga6 temDni dvani alrjo lagi to aepag maro rhi gyao mr sado seda chhu nehvenpagthi chlu vokarthi bhthroom ma javchu ne aekli nthi nikartti sathe hhhhelp joya riksa drpase bive mari bhu6 tene pasgma fechr thy gyu6 te maana drpar6 maadrna kam matr kjeti hti te bthu mara jivvnma vrsothi tha gyu teloko jetpur nnemanu dr vankaner hu hti sicndrbad to maji halt tej hurestr chhu maru plngpa aae6 kem aavu tmara dre jejoya6 tej mukhy nthi jojo mne chhodi ndeta sabnth rakhjo majne yadi mari oanmrthi nkhbr pade pan kam jemate mane joy6 tetne mlvu joya tema koi khel nkrya mne aap bnne maf kajo thnakyo
this is true
Exactly
Going through the comment section is so much healing ❤️
I am not the only one, I feel sorry for so many of us who had to go through this. For everyone, we are all in this together. We'll overcome and find our true love in FREEDOM ❤️
I recommend you to a man who can help you manifest whatever you want to manifest within two-day❤️❤️❤️...
He is a great and powerful man who helped me manifest my ex three days ago without delay 💯💯💯...
WhatsApp him...
+2 3 4 8 1 2 2 5 1 1 9 2 2...
I went no contact with my whole family 16 years ago. My mother was the narcissist and the whole dynamic was toxic. I’ve felt pretty much nothing but relief! My only fear was that she could show up again. Never heard a word thank God!
When my narc returned and took full responsibility...it only lasted 3 weeks! I endured many more months of arguing and a ridiculous behavior.
This is exactly what has happened to me, over and over again, for more than 40 YEARS when I have left the Passive-Aggressive Narcissistic Self-centered, Selfish person in my life, and he always convinced me to go back, and then it starts the cycle all over again. And again. And again. Word for word. I MUST STAY STRONG! And stay away from everyone who always defends and excuses his bad behavior. They've got to go, TOO! 40 years of this s*it and I am almost dead. Paralyzed and trying to remove the strangling vines and cut the tumor out. God Give Me Strength. Gracias, Amen.
God bless you, I hope you managed to go no contact still and heal yourself :)
I’m in this now 39 years and I just realized she sucks me in beats me up then I run the sucks me back it’s like I’m thinking I’m the narcissist I’m so mixed up she did take her wedding ring off took every pic of me off of her FB and tells me all my kids hate me I have made every one leave me because I teach the word of God she puts me down so bad it’s confusion to the max
How do I heal my God
Holy shit you don't need that. Surely you don't feel enticed to go back to him.....NO find a counselor. Don't do it! It will end in tears. Don't waste your life like that.
@@georgeroberts3766 jesus christ
I blocked mine today on everything and blocked his number
Toy Hauls And More well said.
I blocked him on whats app
She’s trying to get to me from various fake calls like internet calls calling me 50 times at night when I call her back to say stop calling me she’s trying to abuse and threatens me with various things I can’t take this anymore what should I do !!
@Aces Do not engage in their sick twisted game. Tell your friends and family to block your ex narcissist
How is it going a year later?
The best blessing is when you free yourself from a narcissist, you will realize that you have the freedom to be yourself as much as you please. Make new friends and you discover who you truly are as a person that the people who love you always saw you as
Out of all the videos I've watched , books I've read, counselling I've had you have just made me realise my deep rooted problem is I want some one to love me and fight for me . Maybe it's time I start loving me and fighting for myself x
Spot on Laura!! blog.melanietoniaevans.com/why-unconditional-love-is-the-key-to-a-fulfilling-and-joyful-life/ xoxox
Laura Jayne Mullins omg me to
Laura Mullins thank you for your conclusion....I am facing the same step in life. I think it will be not easy but....it is possible! You are beautiful...whatever they say! you are beautiful in every way.....Wishing you a long happy and healty life...... Jim.
Laura Mullins Amen
Amen sister!
yes their is no one home, they are empty shells , its strange and weird
Can't wait till I'm old enough to legally leave my narc parents :/
Already imagining them being empty shells lol
That's true, I don't understand it, I grew up with a brother like that. It is impossible to talk to them and get through to them. The light is on but no one is home.
Long before I realized this person in my life was a narcissist, I remember coming to the realization that he was an empty shell, just like you say.
no to me it's more like looking and talking at a distorted mirror
@@kathleenlastname9171 I used to think she had a head injury!!!!
Wow! I did absolutely everything you mentioned, obsessing about the ex, wondering who he was with, stalking his facebook page, etc. And I did feel like I was going completely crazy! It's all I thought about, 24/7. Now, after 19 months, it's a lot better, and I am almost to the point of indifference toward him, and no longer care who he is with or what he is doing. But boy, what a long, difficult journey it has been. BTW, great video as always!
That's wonderful to read Anna and thank you sweetheart xoxox
me too! I even drove past his house to see if another car was there :(
Cathy Ruotolo - Driving past the ex's house was the one thing I didn't do, even though I wanted to, I didn't do it because I was afraid of what I would see. It's fascinating how so many of us do the very same things once we are out of the relationship.
d campbell - Yep, the ex was like that too, I understand how you feel. It really hurts, and they could care less, which makes it even more painful. You will get through it, just take it one day at a time.
Anna Tiernan I still can't believe anything he says so supposedly he's been seeing this girl for over 2 months and two other girls but yet every single day at my house and all this craziness time he loves me little ball Super Bowl s*** who cares but we have a kid together and he says he's a better parent than me but yet he won't even watch a son at all when the girl is over and you wanted to do something because I first you said they were friends I'm like well as a friend you know your friends are my friends right nope so obviously I made him basically just admit it and they hate that they really do he pushed me almost show me the ground they are gets Obamacare like freaking big kids their stupid ignorant self-absorbed scumbags they don't care about anything it's disgusting
I'm just ready to leave. No matter how much it hurts. It can't be worse than it is now.
Trisha Kirby I just left mine hours ago. Known them since 2015, and had a month romantic relationship with them. I choose I’m going to block them on everything soon. You got this. 💕
SAME!!💯
Get out now they Suck gave her a Promised ring and all the fights and disrespect never ends I had bad Asthma wouldn't even call me an Ambulance just laughed. In your face with rage..they are scum male or female and the Demon in there eyes is so unreal keep them away from weapons
Empaths and Narcs are like magnets. A deadly combo until one sucks the life out of the other. I haven’t experienced such a mindf#*k in my life! And we all have inner trauma of some sort to fix (however big or small). I agree that work needs to be done to heal our own needs from within. For me, I recognize through life’s beatings that as an empath, either I need to walk away from someone who has inner demons that will deplete me (if they project that on to others) or set up firm boundaries. Narcs do not make the ideal partners in relationships.. but they do teach us lessons about ourselves. I feel sorry for the narc I met in my last relationship. He built his intimate relationships up on lies to hide behind masks.. he did have trauma and there was some psychological issues there for sure but when someone can’t love themself enough, sadly it can be taken out on others. I wish him healing on his own spiritual journey. He is not for me to fix but I hope he learns that he can’t hurt multiple others along the way. Wish your narcs find empathy for others and let them be on their own journey to self discovery and healing.. when your light shines bright, you’ll attract a few moths... shine a little brighter and they might just sizzle!
Narcissist Abuse is very real. I wish I knew this information 35 years ago. I felt something was wrong with me for not liking my birthgiver. Narcs are sick and it’s mental abuse on an epic scale. You nailed this video. Healing is so hard. Get out ASAP is my advice. Nothing gets better trying to work with a narc, only worse.
They need us more than we need them.
I never would have thought that…they need us more than…
My mother is a narcissist; and I had my 3rd and last child with one. I realized that nothing I say or do will ever make a difference to them. Narcissists have their own reality. It's delusional. My desire to"set them straight" was useless.
Really tough when it's your mother, but it was killing me. I was fortunate to get away from both of them.
Love the comments.
No contact. Cold turkey, as the saying goes. Awesomest thing ever is to get away. Be happy. The peace is fantastic! Block block block. I could care less what she does. She is toxic, aggressive and heartless.. and I don't need that in my life. Is it easy? No. The peptide addiction is real. Your body and mind are out of sync. Go slow. Work through. Mindfulness. Self love. Be free. Be happy :)
What strikes as funny is they can still Love or show affection to their family and portray themselves very well in public. However now I know it may be more than just a NARC, but other BPD disorders she suffers from. I wanted to heal and help her but she cannot control the inner demons
Thanks Gary Weston
Thanks.
Thank you
@@allangraczyk5936 I just don't know why I want to help him so bad even after knowing whatever he did, he knew he was hurting me and still did that. I know he can't care about anyone or anything else other than himself but I still want to help him. How to stop caring for them? How much time will it take?? 😭
I'm going to watch this video everyday to keep myself strong
💖💔
I am happy it resonates with your Shauna xoxox
That's what I was thinking!
Life With Heaven you’re ok girl
I just realised this comment was 7 months ago.... I hope your in a happier place now :). I am you 7 months ago.....pregnant and alone, abused and fearful of the future. It is extremely hard to let go of someone you love because of the pain they can't see they are bringing you. Makes you feel like you're crazy and youre the one who is causing pain so along comes the guilt and then you start speaking and then you get back but then things get worse. argggghhh....... so for now i am going to watch this video daily to keep myself strong also.
Word
I feel bad so bad for him..he needs help but he couldnt control me ..and he hates it.
Kathy Ramos they hates it, when they cannot control you.
oh my god i relate so so hard to this. Currently going through narc detox - the pain is unbearable. They discard you like you are nothing and its mind boggling. Going through no contact and its so hard, thank you for this amazing video
Does it get better after a year
Going thru it now?
If you go back, they will discard you over and over. It is not you. It's them.
@@jamiemcinerney3287 tried so hard because I love her and our daughter. This time I'm not going back.
I do not care I walked away and dropped all the so called friends that knew the narccasist and I'm moving on new chapter
Same here tnx for motivation
When my wife of 25 years decided "she needed to see if she could make it on her own"....after I started looking into why we had such huge credit card bills, I received the most inspired advice from a trusted friend that anyone could have ever given me.
He said TAKE THE HIGH GROUND. At first I did not understand then he explained it. He said NO MATTER what she does or what YOU find out DO NOT REACT in any way other than what common courteousy demands. Simple yes, no, thank you and your welcome.
So the day I signed the Forced Divorce decree in court I went quiet. Only conveyed information with no emotion or opinion.
On our first kid exchange at a safe location (she called the police on me twice while I was at work making false claims. One claim our oldest daughter told the police that her mother was lying and the second time I was able to prove she was lying..) she brought her new male FRIEND. And once I had the kids they followed me for a while. The second kid exchange they both showed up driving old corvettes. After that my father decided to take over that duty.
Weeks later the FRIEND moved in with her and they tried to force the kids to call him dad.
Now its 4 years later and the oldest is out on her own, will not speak to her mother and claims that I am her role model for life.
The 2 youngest HATE the now husband and resent her soooo badly that I have to remind them that WE do not speak ill of others NO MATTET WHAT.
I have stayed single explaining to my kids that yes, mother left me and was cheating (they figured that out on their own) and that entitles me to break the holy contract BUT that does not absolve MY vow to God and my family of for better or worse till......
So, your advice is spot on. All you claim that the Narc will do when you remove the fuel is true. She has done them all... Drinking, spending, illness, stalking and threatening me, took EVERYTHING when she moved out..and I mean EVERYTHING, took me to court over everything she could find a loophole on and TRIED to take the kids. When the kids found out they told her that IF she continued to harass me they would go to court and ask that I be given full custody..mind you I did not know that the oldest orchestrated that or I would have stopped it.
So..my ramblings are ALMOST done... Occasionally she puts the bait in the water to see if I will hit but I never do.
She is unhappily married from all that filters thru to me and my family..oh, when it all started I asked my family to please not get involved in mud slinging and they did so with terrible effort in one case..lol
Anyway, great info, pretty kitty and a pretty lady. Thank you.
Love and blessings to you and your children and it is an absolute pleasure xoxox
Matthew Johnson step parents are terrible.. they hate kids who aren't theirs.. it's just nature.. in nature, "step parents" kill and eat their step kids... Humans have the urge and it comes out in hate and sabotage of the step child's entire life..
Your ex wife and my husband sounds like they are made for each other.
you are the man! you did your children a real favor by not bringing anyone around. my parents divorced when I was a kid in the early 2000s. to this day, I can honestly say that I have never seen my mother with another man! that alone changed my life. They had 4 girls together (including me) my dad had a son with a woman while they were separated and my little brother is the only boy (my mother helped raise him after they renewed their vows) She wanted to lead by example and boy did she! Christ is the only man in her life...I can't tell you how much I envy that alone! She went on to become a successful RN, bought a home (they never owned a home together in the 25 years they were married) and she's still single with no need for any man! She is literally my hero (there's more to the story but it's not mine to tell!) I'm married with kids of my own but I will always have her example IF things go south... something about your story reminded me of hers. May God continue to bless you and yours!💙
what complete generalising bullshit. That may be the story you project onto everyone from your own pain but most step parents love their step kids
True and clear-a must watch for all co-dependents. A narcissist will remain a narcissist forever even if they gain some insight and learn to moderate their behavior slightly. No contact means NO contact! Any contact will be interpreted as an opening for more victimization. Leave the scene and heal yourself. Great video!!
mark gatti oi880”
Thank you. You have greatly helped an old guy of 57, leaving a marriage of 22 years. Too many lies, too many affairs, too many days of fogged thought, losing weight etc. I was either going to go crazy or kill myself. Again thank you.
And it’s a totally new world out here. I was with my ex for years and a narcissist found me. It took his bad behavior for 15 months and now I trust no one. My narsacisst knew I had almost no experience in the dating world and exploited me. It hurts so bad. I’m healing from the divorce and from the first many I dated being a narcissist. No contact
Look at you you have 925 thumbs down
14,000 thumbs up
How many narcissist have watch this ?
925 is the answer!
those are probably because the videos so long Jesus I don't wanna listen to this Australian talk for 22 minutes.
Put all the narcs onto 1 island together. That would be funny
Hahahah
@@toddlove1688 On an island with 925 starving Lions would be the best
@@BrianStyleDeath we suffer Yanks drippling on for 10 minutes before they get to content. You obviously have nothing to learn here.
“You are an object performing a role. There is no one home to really genuinely love themselves let alone another” mind blown.
Been divorced from a covert narcissist for 4 years.
The 7 years being married to her was the most insane emotional and mental period of my life and this video could have really helped me back then. I'm sure many will benefit from it today.
Never thought I'd find myself on a youtube video like this but I'm glad I did.
I AIN'T FALLING FOR YOUR MIND GAMES KYRA!
I’m finally starting to realize what/who I was dealing with all these years... it’s like coming out of a bad dream but I was living it. I spent forever trying to figure out what was happening, all the times he cheated and thought I didn’t know and I never said a word.. when I started realizing what was really going on, I wanted so bad to just get away. He said I was the narcissist and that terrified me, he said I was the manipulator and even though I knew all the things he’d been doing behind my back for years, I still tried to see his point of view, his past, on and on I made excuses and I never told him what I knew or how I knew.. he said no wasn’t him, he said photos of him with other women were photoshopped, strip clubs... you name it. I stayed for almost 13 years and this last year was just pure hell. I thank God for divine intervention and showing me what is really going on. I’ve gone no contact and it’s the most peace I’ve felt in years. I’m excited about life again and learning to love who I am, flaws mistakes and all. I just hope he stays away because now I can no longer make excuses for him. He disgusts me. We have a 10 year old child together and I would die before I let him ruin his life any longer and I won’t feel guilty for keeping him away. He’s traumatized both of us for far too long. His other women can have him and his friends, he only uses and abuses them too and I refuse to be a part of any of it anymore, and I don’t care if it takes me 100 years to put my life back together. 100 years in peace is worth everything to me. Life is good again and I can see the light again finally, God is opening doors for me that I thought I didn’t deserve or even recognize. Thank you for these videos and thank you God for saving me before I slipped over the edge and never came back. I thank my parents for loving me, my friends, my children, when I wasn’t able to love myself. To anyone fighting this battle, just know there is hope and a lot of it. Pull yourself away from the lies long enough and hope and peace come flooding back quicker than you can imagine. Forgive them and be happy again and don’t hold onto any of it. Learn from it, grow from it, love yourself enough and release it to God. That is the true freedom. Kevin I forgive you wholeheartedly and I truly wish you the best. I may not understand it all yet but I refuse to hold onto your poison for you any longer. I give it to God. Love to everyone fighting this battle, don’t give up hope. ✌🏼 ♥️ ☺️ I promise you can find it again. Keep your faith and be strong.
Lovely message. Thank you
Cari Mauk sorry, now you just have to trust God Only.
@Sara Allison What a dumb question!
Well said God bless you and your boy to 🙏👍
Peace dear and love from India 🇮🇳
She is just amazing. It all makes crazy sense. What a nightmare these relationships are. The WORST relational pain someone can endure.
Yes these relationships are a night mare... I don't know how to come out of it.they will leave no trial or evidence
bhavik padia t
Yes! Not how I envisioned my later years (72) and not from my own flesh and blood.. insanity!
🤣 All of these are so true! My ex even got hit by a car & made other people contact me telling me to have sympathy for him. I was just thinking “was it caught on video?!” I’d pay to see that!!! I don’t know nor give a shit about the last one! I do pray for the safety of the next person he’s ever involved with.
Don't do this to me! 😅😅😅😅😅😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Beauty Mar the levels 🤣🤣 but I've been there too
I’m dead af 😂
lmao
Beauty Mar
Were you driving the car?
So sad im 41 and only have just been seeking advice after briefly dating a guy with inner trauma.
He loved bomb me.. Then let his mask slip. A vicious circle of leaving and coming back. Using childhood issues for his behaviour. Of course i tried to help.. But i can't no more.
He is right we do have a connection. But i cant be around somone that takes his pain out on me. I no longer want to supply his energy. Im mentally drained and hurting as i detox from him.. I won't change who i am. And i wont allow him to make me doubt myself. 😭 Im now in no contact and i know he has already replaced me.. I meant nothing to him that's the truth. And i cant even describe the pain.. I pray that god will help me to heal.. I pray for us all.. 🙏😭
OMG! The metaphor of the crocodile checking to see if the lump of meat is still there is priceless. I'm still cracking up.
Laura Brookstone,You look stunning 🌹🌷🌺,hope you are not with a narc 😈!!
Letting go of a soulmate, is the most traumatic break up.
But, not even soulmates are promised to us forever!
You only THINK they are a soulmate because of the good they've done getting you.
Silent Mira - Sorry hun. I KNOW the difference between a soulmate, and one who isn't! And that each of us, could possibly have more than one.
I've written, giving examples, explained to other nonbelievers (not certain if you are), the soulmate dynamic! I always go back to this simple, yet poignant closing. "Not spending forever w your soul's mate, is quite sad [because I also believe circumstances, timing, unseen forces, predict these outcome] However, having never met one's soulmate, is the saddest of all".
I agree in that, certainly one can be fooled if he/she lack the simple ability to discern the difference. It is much more than falling in love.
It is hard to remind yourself of the one truth in all this. Just remember this, he was never YOUR soulmate, you were made to believe he was yours. Its OK, well all suffered this trickery in the highest order. Also remember this isn't reflective of any flaw of your own but a testament to your trusting personality and your ability to share your vulnerabilities. He will never be this type of person, yet even having experienced this trauma, you will ALWAYS stay true to yourself and that is a far better characteristic you can be proud of.
Anyone who abuses you mentally for the benefit of
Themselves is definitely not a soul mate. We might have thought so but a guy who really truly cares about you will not manipulate you. It’s up to us to accept the facts and love ourselves more than we were showing love to them
I'm so grateful for the judge granting me with a PERMANENT restraining order against my ex-narc. I had to go to the extremes to remove her from my home/life...
Well done.
Three days no contact and I am shocked at the amount of peace I’m feeling. He went really crazy in the end and I found out a lot of things I’d always had a feeling about. Now I’m free.
how it feels now?
Oh Jenny, that's soo cool. Don't you dare relapse. You'll regret, trust me. . Keep it up.
Peace pEace PEACE!!!!!
This woman IS a genius. Her emotional intelligence is beyond amazing.
Hurt people, hurt people...... Peace
Brent Testerman FACTS!!👍🏽👍🏽👏🏾
I love this woman and I don't know her. This process is indeed painful, and there is NO easy way to handle it. Its crazy that this occurs, Im with my other recovering brothers and sisters stay strong and if you fall we got you
Qaadir Howard I need help. Im out of my relationship bt I have a child wit a narc. N I thought I was healing but at this point I feel like im loosing myself n my mind.
Ariel denson you need directions for real. they will do anything to stay in control.
Ariel denson I might can give you some advice on that. had to help my sister thru that.
john archer at this point ive become abusive bcuz he wnt stop bothering me..
Ariel denson hit me on Facebook Mauricearcher@ymail.com
When I went no contact 6 years ago from my narc mother and sister; it went from "who gives a shit about you....don't think people are going to chase you down...keep thinking you are that important". ...then "if you don't forgive people, God will never forgive you. ...I will pray for you..." To "I think someone is keeping you hostage....contact us asap...whatever you are going through please let us know"....
Won't be fooled again ....not it this lifetime 🙄
Fell in love with one. Cut contact. 15 years later, he fooled me again. Still not sure if even a narc. So terribly lost and dissappointed of myself. Still so very in love. I really don't wish this for anyone.
I'm about to be 40. I have been with my husband for 18 yrs married 12 years. We share a daughter. He doesn't help me financially with our daughter but won't divorce me. He is currently with another woman which I want it to end to help focus on raising our daughter and show more love. I do have more emotional feelings for him, and I don't want him feeling for anyone else but just his family,, I want him to pay spousal support and child support. I want him to realize what a good woman he had in me and lost and eventually be back in love with me. When I contacted PROPHET EHIAGWINA he was able to restore the love and support and he brought my husband back home and today our love has increased, P.E bind us together. my advise to women is that don't be too rush out of marriage if you still love your partner, fight to have him back by prayers from P.E his hear for you... Do you want your Ex back, kill your enimy, clear bad energy, or divorce or make someone love you, then contact P.E today by reaching him out on email below Thank you
Email (prophetehiagwina@gmail.com)
@@felicitybele9554 hallo i need Help
woah. Clicked the video to find out if IM the narcissist just to find out IM being manipulated by one. good to hear someone confirm why I am so uncomfortable with the relationship.
Narc or not people don't try to steal your SOUL which is what evil VAMPIRES do. It doesn't matter if it's family or not stay away and feed your own self worth.
Social Butterfly Yes!!!
So we're just dolls in a calender...a game
Social Butterfly 😞 yeahhhh
Social Butterfly yes mam
Social Butterfly true indeed, in the beginning of my relationship with a narc he actually said to me "I want your soul"
The worse thing I ever could of done was take him back. 🙄 five years of abuse I am now into month one of no contact and I will never take him back. This month has been so peaceful and happy. Thanks sooooo much.