Could Being Dumped Be A Blessing?

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  • Опубліковано 20 жов 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 585

  • @seanj11421
    @seanj11421 2 роки тому +117

    Be with someone that wants to be with you as much as you want to be with them..

    • @duniael4156
      @duniael4156 5 місяців тому

      But when do you know that? Because often the first year, 2 years are so beautiful

  • @wandasantillo1678
    @wandasantillo1678 6 років тому +761

    I am so much happier without my ex. I can now say the break up was a blessing because I want to be with someone who wants to be with me.

    • @sshuteandrew
      @sshuteandrew 6 років тому +51

      Wanda Santillo Yes, chasing an ex and feeling rejected and walking on eggshells is no way to love or live. I’m letting go and letting God! I’m so tired of his depression and rejection!! Looking to forward to better people and things to come!

    • @margomazzeo1680
      @margomazzeo1680 4 роки тому +8

      @@sshuteandrew It will come to you..💝🎈

    • @bambam9315
      @bambam9315 4 роки тому +9

      ...who wants to be with you unconditionally...

    • @deiavcarvalho
      @deiavcarvalho 3 роки тому +5

      @@sshuteandrew hi Summer. I got the same problem. My husband and me whatever small fight we have, he got depressive, he always step back, isolate himself and rejected me about weeks ahead. I'm tired of it. How the things going about you?

    • @MatthewPlatz
      @MatthewPlatz 3 роки тому +2

      Well done, Wanda! Wish you only happiness!

  • @williamheinsinger7390
    @williamheinsinger7390 6 років тому +294

    She is someone ELSE'S Problem now ,be glad 👍

    • @erosvera9945
      @erosvera9945 5 років тому +4

      William Heinsinger hahaha so f true

    • @danielacanto6164
      @danielacanto6164 5 років тому +1

      hi I just wanna say I agree with that shirt sentice. how my ex was with me and his behavior issues he too can b someone else's problem 😊

    • @margomazzeo1680
      @margomazzeo1680 4 роки тому +2

      Let someone else do the dirty work..

    • @martamanno22
      @martamanno22 4 роки тому +5

      as sad and disgraceful
      as it may sound
      I shall admit to myself
      and to Coach Lee Community
      now that I have the chance:
      yes, it was problematic
      yes, it was disfunctional
      yes, it was on different pages
      as bad as you may want things
      and you start seeing life
      through rose-coloured glasses
      even when the reality
      tells you othrrwise
      the dumper finally realized:
      he could not use you any longer
      he could not
      make you live in his lie
      he was not up to your standards
      (and/or expectations)
      yes, it has been a blessing
      yes, it was a burden
      (I was living in boundage,
      sickness, dependency, compromising, etc.)
      yes, I learned the lesson
      the hard way
      and I am even thankful
      to my husband and send him blessing, love and mercy
      he actually set me free
      and I do not have to settle
      for less nor for a mediocre life
      I am strong
      I am focused
      I am worthy

    • @mzj-gc9ic
      @mzj-gc9ic 4 роки тому +4

      Just found out my EX was cheating on me with the neighbor, his problem now...

  • @ghiec.8353
    @ghiec.8353 4 роки тому +433

    I was teary eyed😢 when Coach Lee said focus on your family. On people who will not break up on you. 2 months after break up. One month no contact. I used to watch videos on how to get your ex back but now found myself looking for videos on how to move on. Thank you Coach Lee! Feel talking to a friend everytime I watch you. 😢

    • @swativirdi3020
      @swativirdi3020 4 роки тому

      Stay strong ❤ hope all is fine now?? Did u guys get back??

    • @ghiec.8353
      @ghiec.8353 4 роки тому +11

      @@swativirdi3020 no but he reached out last March, on the exact date the day we met in person. I did not reply. That was the last time he reached out as of to date

    • @swativirdi3020
      @swativirdi3020 4 роки тому +14

      @@ghiec.8353 so you've moved on... good to hear that. ❤

    • @binoddavidminj9646
      @binoddavidminj9646 3 роки тому +2

      Me too want to move on
      And open my heart again to new possibilities
      Give my 100% to that person that they deserve

    • @EX0t1C
      @EX0t1C 3 роки тому +2

      In this same situation lol, i think everyone starts doing that. How r u doing a year later?

  • @jambogb
    @jambogb 2 роки тому +91

    It's so nice to know I am NOT the only one going through this shitty time in my life 💖
    ❤BE STRONG EVERYONE!❤

    • @jaysilver5219
      @jaysilver5219 Рік тому +4

      It really sucks but were going to be great after this ..time time time

  • @ahmog
    @ahmog 4 роки тому +61

    Getting dumped by a toxic girlfriend is a Blessing! I'm not the Jerk. I'm good.

  • @dianeh1162
    @dianeh1162 6 років тому +173

    I'm still sad. Being dumped makes you feel empty. In the long run, he did me a favor. I lost him and he lost me.

    • @barbarariley3488
      @barbarariley3488 5 років тому +27

      I like what you said."I lost him and he lost me". Right he lost you you were not the only one who lost . Good luck.

    • @kagamitaiga9167
      @kagamitaiga9167 9 місяців тому

      update?

  • @Zgryx
    @Zgryx 2 роки тому +38

    I like this video because he’s not trying to sell his program, but instead he’s trying to help us heal.

  • @sshuteandrew
    @sshuteandrew 6 років тому +283

    Truth!! Working on oneself, trying to get your ex, strategies, plans, no contact, how to approach and when, eggshells...SO much effort!!! No relationship should be like this!! Let go and let God!! Preach it!! Be strong everyone! Better things to come💗

    • @highcurrent1125
      @highcurrent1125 6 років тому +5

      Stacey, I appreciate your optimism and *faith* in the future. You are giving heart felt hope to people, thanks...

    • @sshuteandrew
      @sshuteandrew 6 років тому +2

      HighCurrent11 Thank you 💗 Best wishes on your journey 🙏🏻

    • @fennel18
      @fennel18 5 років тому +6

      Working on yourself and learning skills should be a life long mission though @stacey s

    • @Genes1s___
      @Genes1s___ 5 років тому +6

      _ BUDDHA _ I feel you brother, I’m in the same boat. But I do believe the tables WILL turn... because they lost someone who would never give up on them. And that’s going to be really hard to replace.

    • @Genes1s___
      @Genes1s___ 5 років тому +1

      _ BUDDHA _ I’m in the same boat bro. She reached out after 31 days and I’m currently in 2 weeks NC as well. Don’t look back keep moving forward!

  • @kathyglass2922
    @kathyglass2922 Рік тому +12

    After listening to all these videos of coach, my ex is looking less and less desirable to me.
    It was really good advice to go out and be with friends, again and again. To do things with friends. To focus on cleaning and decorating my house, exercising, dressing up, focusing on growing my career, meeting new people in my field, people who want to help, and visiting new places. One hour ago, I was upset and missing the past, and now, for whatever reason, I'm feeling free. I can't believe it. That is amazing. I hope this feeling stays and I wish it for each and everyone of you. Now when I hear coach say, "I'll help you get your ex back," I think. "No, please.
    I don't want him back" He hasn't texted or called for 2 weeks, and unless he is dead, or in the hospital and someone has his phone, or he is kidnapped, there is no acceptable reason for not staying in contact with me. And to hear Coach says that my ex thinks he is better than me? Sorry! My ex is delusional, then.
    And your ex is delusional, too, if they think they are better than you, because you are a loyal, caring person. That is worth more than all the gold in the world.

    • @thegearman
      @thegearman 5 місяців тому

      That's the thing. Each day of no contact you start to not want them again.

  • @AmberMcQuiston
    @AmberMcQuiston 4 роки тому +172

    I remember watching this video a couple weeks after my breakup, and I could barely stomach it because I was in such denial and grief. All I could think about was getting my ex boyfriend back. I'm watching this now 3 months post breakup and this is a very important video. I'm getting closer to moving on every day. Still a process though.

    • @USMCGUY2020
      @USMCGUY2020 3 роки тому

      Im going through a breakup right now and its hell i want her back to much. Did you ever get back with your ex? And if not did you find someone else?

    • @AmberMcQuiston
      @AmberMcQuiston 3 роки тому +14

      @@USMCGUY2020 We were broken up for 6 months... He started texting me periodically around the 4 month mark... And he reached out month 6, and asked if we could get back together and try a FWB thing. I was still in love with him, so I didn't care. I figured if we started seeing each other again, it would eventually evolve back into a real relationship... Which it did... However, he broke up with me AGAIN after just 2 months. It's now 6 months later... He didn't contact me on my birthday a month ago (which I thought he would if he still thought about me). I have since started seeing other people and am starting to be interested in someone else. My ex and I were in a toxic relationship that had a foundation of amazing, passionate sex...not genuine compatibility. He and I were absolutely not a good match... That's all I'm gonna say. You're gonna have to have your own personal journey with this.

    • @mollymc
      @mollymc 3 роки тому

      Update? How are you doing now

    • @AmberMcQuiston
      @AmberMcQuiston 3 роки тому +9

      @@mollymc We eventually got back together after 9 months apart… And he literally just broke up with me again a couple days ago after we had been back together for 6 months. Good times. I’m atleast not an emotional mess this time. Just feels like a pattern.

    • @mollymc
      @mollymc 3 роки тому +3

      @@AmberMcQuiston so sorry to hear that thank you for the update sending you lots of love and very happy you're doing better this time around!

  • @iraira9111
    @iraira9111 2 роки тому +20

    When they assure you “I won’t survive if something happens to you” and then dump you for another one while you were going through depression - smashes you completely.
    One day you are the center of the universe for them, and then with the snap of a finger - they “love her like no one before”, and you’ become an empty sound for them. Awesome

  • @marcvslicinivscrassvs7536
    @marcvslicinivscrassvs7536 5 років тому +89

    Yes, it can. After getting dumped, I decided to finally, truly confront my insecurities. Life's been much better since now that I don't need a person in my life to give me value.

  • @jcm5604
    @jcm5604 5 років тому +147

    I’ve never heard a human being so tuned in and sharp in their thought process like this coach lee.....this guy is amazing!!!

  • @keithnorton1966
    @keithnorton1966 5 років тому +126

    This Man is really smart. This is definitely his best one yet, the realest one yet

  • @kkhdeir1256
    @kkhdeir1256 4 роки тому +90

    What a kind, genuine, caring, loving human being this man is. Gratitude coach..

  • @Moore18jp
    @Moore18jp 5 років тому +55

    I dated a bipolar depressed guy.. which I mistakenly tried to help and "save" him . But it was draining my energy daily and affecting my health. He walked out on me and it truly felt like a blessing from the skies, my life is now stress free and strangely I don't miss him at all.

  • @antoniogonzalez9939
    @antoniogonzalez9939 5 років тому +153

    I just wanted to thank you. I'm currently in no contact with my ex. It's so damn hard not to pick up the phone and call her or text her. Every time I get the urge to contact her, I watch one of your videos instead. It helps a lot. So thank you.

    • @millennialpodcast1438
      @millennialpodcast1438 5 років тому +1

      I hope u stay strong ... I also lost the love of my life she was she best thing happened to me but yeah.. no cheating but she dumber me because we had our Problems , Depression childhood trauma, arguing and not mature enough (20&22) and it was doomed to be failed.. but the love was so truly.. she is texting with someone new now after a month of the break up.. it kills my soul and my will for life ..
      She sad it's nothing really serious but it can happen

    • @millennialpodcast1438
      @millennialpodcast1438 5 років тому

      I hope u stay strong ... I also lost the love of my life she was she best thing happened to me but yeah.. no cheating but she dumber me because we had our Problems , Depression childhood trauma, arguing and not mature enough (20&22) and it was doomed to be failed.. but the love was so truly.. she is texting with someone new now after a month of the break up.. it kills my soul and my will for life ..
      She sad it's nothing really serious but it can happen

    • @jaysilver5219
      @jaysilver5219 Рік тому

      It gets easier you will instantly regret it if do call or send that text..trust me

  • @angelique1508
    @angelique1508 5 років тому +50

    Im so guilty of painting the past all rosy. In my saner moments, I'm relieved it's over and hope he doesn't call. Then I get these CRAZY days, where he's all I think about.

  • @chrisbryant2283
    @chrisbryant2283 6 років тому +150

    Yes it is sir coach Lee it always is a blessing. After 6 months of NC I finally woke up and didnt even miss her sir and straight away just deleted her number. Straight after I saw her on my facebook feed and she was looking pretty nice and I even said "Damn you go lady" almost as if it was some random lady who was not my Ex sir! For the first time it didnt affect me and I feel really happy Sir Coach Lee. I am living my life in a much better way and I actually want to thank her for breaking up with me! Yes sir this also sounds crazy to me. I dont even care if she has someone or not because my life is finally complete. Will she come back sometime in the future? Only the universe knows but I am still happy.
    update: I have been improving my english skills. How is it now? Thank you so much Sir Coach Lee Sir. I salute you!

    • @sshuteandrew
      @sshuteandrew 6 років тому +10

      Chris Bryant Good for you!!! And your English is great!! I’m an English teacher so that means something coming from me!! 👍🎉💙

    • @benjaminhdavidson5603
      @benjaminhdavidson5603 5 років тому +17

      Stop saying sir all the time hes not been knighted by the Queen

    • @uh-lee-sha5319
      @uh-lee-sha5319 5 років тому +2

      @@benjaminhdavidson5603 lol

    • @brandonohara4122
      @brandonohara4122 2 роки тому

      @@benjaminhdavidson5603 lol

  • @djay00009
    @djay00009 3 роки тому +6

    This is exactly what I will do . Bye bye ex . I gotta live my life , achieve my goals and do whatever I want to ;) . Thank you my ex . You taught me a lot and I am in a better place than I was in the past . I still love you but I'll let it go . We could have been married . Had kids, live a great life but you didn't deserve someone who loved you unconditionally . Take care of yourself. Thank you Coach Lee .

  • @KomoGetsFomo
    @KomoGetsFomo 3 роки тому +66

    You feel like a family member to me, I was crying all the way through because I really hold your opinions in a high regard and I trust them the most. I also feel comfortable letting my vulnerabliltiies show where I imagine that you're giving me a talk to make me stronger, so yes today is waterworks

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  3 роки тому +59

      I’m so sorry for your pain. Try to remind yourself that you only have to take things one minute at a time. No one can make you do more than that. Slow things down. Nothing has to happen right now in order for you to be with him again. Just stay right here in this moment with me and don’t run away from it to the future. Just stay right here in this moment and feel how much easier it is. When you feel your thoughts stray, bring them back. Slow your breathing down and feel yourself in slow motion. Make sense?

    • @kathyglass2922
      @kathyglass2922 Рік тому

      @@RealCoachLee yay coach!!!

  • @rootedrotor525
    @rootedrotor525 3 роки тому +5

    This is the best advice. It ended for a reason. Its broken. Move it on and put it behind you. Believe me - I KNOW!!

  • @toshlahy
    @toshlahy 2 роки тому +5

    I hate this video because there’s so many hard truths in it that I need to accept. Most of my pain is loss and there’s no way around that.

  • @gnnaal
    @gnnaal 6 років тому +63

    What makes you an exceptional Coach is you like to give positive/uplifting/optimistic advice after mentioning something that isn't easy to hear. For example, when you said "keep your mind open, maybe them leaving was a good thing" but you still advised to not give up on getting your ex back, just simply keep an open mind. Allow the possibility of you two never talking again. Positives to a negative situation. Thank you for giving meaningful and sentimental advice.

  • @wandayarbrough
    @wandayarbrough 2 роки тому +11

    This is 100 percent correct. It is a blessing. My life has gotten better ever since. If they have a addiction or other problems that are more important than you are. It will always come first. You never will. So finding someone that can put you first is a blessing. But putting yourself first is the best thing you can do for yourself. Wish them the best and let go and move on.

  • @buntingsmith
    @buntingsmith 4 роки тому +49

    This is the video I’ve been avoiding, but after 2 weeks of “no contact” my mind is certainly open to watching it. Thank you x

  • @carolloraine223
    @carolloraine223 5 років тому +39

    I say...stay SINGLE. You'll live longer! 💖💖💖

    • @ifyify6073
      @ifyify6073 4 роки тому

      Yep you so right & there's a but

    • @Amctothemoon
      @Amctothemoon 3 роки тому

      Abs you’ll be richer

    • @jasonarokiaraj9817
      @jasonarokiaraj9817 3 роки тому

      I think you should still go on dates with other women but still re-attract your ex.

  • @michaelsmooth1
    @michaelsmooth1 10 місяців тому +4

    This is the best video from Coach Lee, because if you think about it if someone can leave you and not be willing to work it out with you no matter what, then maybe you're better off ! Because don't you want someone in your life that can stay by your side through thick and thin ? I'm so grateful for the break up now because I finally realize my ex is only looking out for herself. Why would I want someone like that ? It's interesting but she's still trying to get me back now but only on her terms. Nope I'm good thank you so much for showing me who you really are ! Definitely a blessing 🙏🏻

    • @bobbysilver272
      @bobbysilver272 Місяць тому

      I saw this and had to reply. My wife of 31 years gave up a couple of years ago. I've spent the last year emotionally and mentally trying to win her back. Trying to appeal to her logic side of how screwed up things have become because of her wish to leave etc..She loves me but is not in love with me anymore. Much of her behaviour still makes no sense to me. However, I can't carry on like this. She has moved on and I was hoping she would return. In many ways I admire her strength in sticking to her decision. She wants things in life that she believes I failed to provide. I can't overcome that in her. She doesn't want to fix it. Partly because it seems like too much work and probably lots of pain in rehashing old memories and situations. So instead she want a new life. I don't like it on the whole and it saddens me because I thought I was her life partner. Obviously not. I realise I loved her and was more devoted to her than the other way around.
      I'll still be connected in some degree as she is the mother of our children. Life can be tough and sometimes I question if hooking up with someone so deeply is worth the pain if it falls apart. Perhaps if I had better understood things when they happened in case of letting them drify by then things would have been different.
      Maybe it is a chance for me to work on me and develop as a being.
      Good luck to you and me and anyone else that reads this messages.

  • @Bianca-yt7pd
    @Bianca-yt7pd 11 місяців тому +2

    I listened to this four years ago when I was heartbroken. I listened to this many times. Four years later I have accomplished so much that would have never happened had we got back together. It was hard, but it was so much better for me.

  • @marcvslicinivscrassvs7536
    @marcvslicinivscrassvs7536 4 роки тому +19

    Yes! It forces you to work on aspects of yourself that you may have been to complacent to tackle. Just don't work on these things for the person who dumped you. Do it for yourself and when the time is right you'll enjoy a better relationship with a new person.

  • @PianoMan4Life1982
    @PianoMan4Life1982 5 років тому +50

    Thanks Lee. After a lot of push and pull in my mind I have decided to give up. I have been doing no contact anyways but got a false sense of hope when she told me she misses me and thought about me all the time. She is dating someone else though and I have to accept that and live my life.

  • @wwbenee
    @wwbenee 5 років тому +137

    Sometimes your ex really was / is a wonderful person that invested so much in the relationship and you can only look at yourself for ruining it. And that's the hardest to deal with.

    • @_camy_
      @_camy_ 4 роки тому +1

      wwbenee yup.

    • @_camy_
      @_camy_ 4 роки тому +22

      wwbenee the mistakes I made were absolutely avoidable and the train wreck from the first mistake led to many more and I couldn’t stop the snowball effect. I became emotionally unavailable and needy at the same time.

    • @jrysandy5681
      @jrysandy5681 4 роки тому +16

      Yes I can’t stop blaming myself for destroying it and I lost a good person.

    • @Sarai0901
      @Sarai0901 4 роки тому +18

      Yes me too, he was a good man, dedicated, compassionate, honest, and i ruined it because i was so clingy and needy, never had a guy like him (my past relationships were pretty bad) so i guess my fear of losing him became overwhelming, but now i know that i cannot keep somebody in a cage, so when he broke up with me, i just accepted it and im trying to move on and work on myself

    • @Sarai0901
      @Sarai0901 4 роки тому +2

      @B H thank you, I know that now

  • @gabbymontoya2085
    @gabbymontoya2085 4 роки тому +10

    Cried tremendously after this video.. he is right.. you have to let go .

  • @andrewmarkson7882
    @andrewmarkson7882 5 років тому +60

    What a beautifully encouraging story. This video was just what I needed to feel better about my ex leaving me after being together almost two years, relocating with me, and then blindsiding me by leaving with no sign of having been unhappy or conflicted.
    Lee is right; I'm so much better off than to be with someone who keeps all her thoughts and feelings to herself.
    I also find it refreshing how many people in these comments mention God. He rescued me from a situation that wasn't good for me or my faith.

    • @carmensmith1453
      @carmensmith1453 3 роки тому +2

      Hello Andrew yes God works mysterious ways perhaps to loose my ex might be a blessing he's been so horrible w me ...I was kind to him ...hope u ok

  • @silvana11221122
    @silvana11221122 Рік тому +2

    how many times have i avoided this video ... i should have listened before now.... to become stronger. thank you Coach Lee

  • @scottmartin1688
    @scottmartin1688 6 років тому +48

    My ex is a big time alcoholic and is extremely insecure and over sensitive. She would break up with me for all kinds of crazy reasons and then I would let her cool down and then get back together with her. She is a nice person but a nut job and I tried to "fix her" and help her beat the booze to no avail. I now have a new GF and she is crazy about me and it is truly a two way relationship without the drama. She is a blessing. So hang in there folks...when one door closes a better one will open up.

    • @bguy86
      @bguy86 5 років тому

      Scott Martin she’s a narc bro ! Let that one go and move on

    • @jeremyfowler2169
      @jeremyfowler2169 5 років тому +4

      Dude I hear that. My ex drank like a fish. Insecure, borderline bi-polor. Maybe narcissist. Broke up with me for stupid shit and had a dude two weeks after. I’m kinda glad she’s gone.

    • @bguy86
      @bguy86 5 років тому

      Jeremy Fowler Yah sounds just like my ex ! And I believe my ex could be a narc cause she tried to rub shit in my face about this new guy and spies on my Facebook

    • @jeremyfowler2169
      @jeremyfowler2169 5 років тому

      Brandon Guy mine blocked me on all social shit. She also threw it in my face that she was dating “a great guy” and to move on to “ have a good life”.

    • @bguy86
      @bguy86 5 років тому +1

      Jeremy Fowler she’ll unblock you soon , put your money on it ! She’s also stalking your Facebook and getting word off it from a mutual friend . Mine says all that but still stalks my Facebook through a mutual friend

  • @cherrybacon5154
    @cherrybacon5154 5 років тому +14

    I used to think time and time again that when my Ex let me down with his promises regarding this or that, it was the end of the world. Its my Birthday tomorrow, and I was looking forward to having a good day with his help, but he's bailed out on me again and is going to treat his mates instead, saying we're done because I stand up to him. My original plan was to spend the day with my Son and his Son, not having much money, but still being with two of my precious people. After being dumped again, I feel I have a lot to be grateful for. I have my family, my security and I'm alive. All the aspects of no contact help me to see things and build confidence. Pick myself up, dust myself off and carry on. Thanks Coach. Cherry 🍒.

    • @Froggy-qe1dg
      @Froggy-qe1dg 4 роки тому

      I’m going trough the same right now. Tomorrow is my birthday and we had plans of spending it camping or just the two of us because of money. But he left me again just a week before my birthday because I also stood up to him , but I have my family my nieces that makes me happy and after days of thinking that maybe i did wrong I’m finally thinking this might of been a blessing

  • @tinkertailorsoldiersailor1346
    @tinkertailorsoldiersailor1346 5 років тому +38

    I really like coach Lee as he does talk alot of sense and does not encourage game playing. I just want to say one thing to all the people who have suffered or are suffering from a breakup.
    I have been through 4 very difficult breakups. Each breakup was crippling. In my youth and absence of understanding laws of attraction I made huge mistakes like begging pleasing chasing etc. Only to look desperate and low value. But folks all I can say is I was able to replace each and every single ex. Now I am in a long term relationship with someone and it's a very healthy relationship. Looking back I want to convey one message. No one is worth your energy. If they don't want you, give them a dignified 'goodbye.' Move on to the next one. There will always be someone else. Learn from every failed relationship so that when you do meet the right person you will not be making mistakes and you can maintain a healthy relationship.

    • @mollymc
      @mollymc 3 роки тому

      Did any of your exes ever try to get back together?

  • @teresaolofson1377
    @teresaolofson1377 4 роки тому +2

    this man Coach Lee is about the only person i have faith in right now as i wish to build faith in myself

  • @Finally4Christ
    @Finally4Christ 5 років тому +8

    I'm really afraid that no one will love me like he did. I left a loveless marriage of 17 yrs and was single for 3yrs before meeting James. He was wonderful and for the first time in my life I really fell in love. I never thought it would happen for me but it did. It was the happiest I can ever remember being in my life. I'm so thankful for the time I had with him.

    • @caroline3206
      @caroline3206 5 років тому

      This gives me hope. I'm happy you're happy.

  • @eleojay401
    @eleojay401 2 роки тому +7

    I was in a two year relationship that was good, but I knew very early on that I went into the relationship just because I was lonely.
    We never argued, we loved each others company, and really cared for one another, but something didnt feel right. When she dumped me, I was really devestated for 3-4 months after, but I knew deep inside that she ending it was the best thing for both of us.
    I loved her more like a friend, and it had been like that from the beginning. She fell in love with me, but I did not fall in love with her. There wasnt really any passion sexually, and I felt I was trapped in something unsatisfying.
    I knew her breaking up with me was a blessing in disguise, but for some reason I tried to get her back, even though I knew she wasnt the right one for me. After about 4 month of alot of tears and stress, I finally understood it was the best thing that has happened to me, because I learned so much about myself and relationships that has changed my life in so many ways.
    Most important thing Ive learned was "never say yes to a relationship because of lonelyness".
    Get to know the other well, take your time, and be very clear about if the person in front of you will meet your needs.

    • @katemoore2660
      @katemoore2660 2 роки тому

      I feel the same way. My ex dumped me one month ago. I knew he wasn’t right for me but still loved him and felt like I couldn’t dump him. I hate to be alone. I have been hoping he’d get in touch but it wouldn’t be right. He had so many red flags that I ignored. I have so much love to give. I was with him 3 1/2 years. He wanted to move in but I have two children and didn’t want him too. I didn’t think he was reliable or responsible. I would have been looking after him like a mother not an equal partner.

    • @irinab.pavlikovska3465
      @irinab.pavlikovska3465 6 місяців тому

      This is a really really sad if a good person does not meet your needs… What kind of needs? What are those needs a good person cannot meet especially if you uave already started a relationship so there was some kind of attraction? Aren’t you chasing some kind of “perfect match” person?

  • @OluDJustAnotherMakeupAddict
    @OluDJustAnotherMakeupAddict 6 років тому +51

    Exactly what I needed to help me go strong!

    • @bigadventur
      @bigadventur 6 років тому +2

      Your beautiful ! Life will get better ! That's what I keep telling myself.

  • @shaunfazli1600
    @shaunfazli1600 10 місяців тому +1

    Great thanks. My ex was not ready to change within herself so it was so blessing for me to let go my emotional attachment. I moved on now and now my focus is on myself.

  • @shidow5035
    @shidow5035 7 місяців тому +1

    it's so painful, that you did everything, but nothing works...

  • @kimsikorski5691
    @kimsikorski5691 6 років тому +32

    I will say one thing about you is that you actually give advice and actually let people know why their ex did this or said that where most people that talk about relationships whether it's trying to get them back they actually never tell you much of anything. They just talk around in circles and you are just as dumb founded as you were before you watched the video. I think you will go far with your channel, just keep doing what you are doing and not change to the ones I talked about above and you will go far my friend, very far. God bless.💕

  • @JetDriver1111
    @JetDriver1111 5 років тому +39

    Just wanted to say thanks Lee. You are helping me get through this terrible time. I was blinded sided by my girlfriend the other day. I came home to an empty house and a note on the table. You are hands down the best coach out there !!! I have been in a lot of relationships and I usually help others with theirs but this time I needed some help and understanding. Your expertise and kind nature has probably helped thousands of people and I am one of them. I would like to send you some money directly to you. I don't do the online thing. I've been hacked and lost a few thousand before. Let me know how to get it to you. GOD bless you. You're a lifesaver in a bad time for me !! You're the best !!! Listen to him people !! He is dead on !!!

    • @badgaldidi3352
      @badgaldidi3352 5 років тому +3

      JetDriver1111 I just can’t believe people do this to an other human being

    • @margomazzeo1680
      @margomazzeo1680 4 роки тому +4

      @@badgaldidi3352 Hard to believe..yet Karma will visit them sooner or later..trust me..

    • @brandonohara4122
      @brandonohara4122 2 роки тому +1

      @@badgaldidi3352 ya what a way to leave someone. A note and empty house. Wow, unbelievable.

    • @badgaldidi3352
      @badgaldidi3352 2 роки тому

      @@margomazzeo1680 Definitely!

  • @nicolechemla4627
    @nicolechemla4627 Рік тому +3

    Bless you dear Coach.. often during so many breakups on his part, so many silence periods and him abusing my love for him, I used to think I could be much healthier, even happier without him... and here you are, supporting me! I praise the Lord for you being there just now for me, and for making me realize that I haven't lost it.. In fact, entertaining this idea on your behalf is giving me such peace of mind.. so much strength and for once - after 40 years of endurance and miscalculations, misunderstandings and blaming myself, at long last I feel relieved. For the first time, I even feel the right to even dump the guy!! He had caused so much pain over the years.. so much that I almost lost my mind, my sanity! Crying so much for not having the guts to leave him right there and, especially, for loving him more than I loved myself. The humiliation was killing me over and over again.. and now I am Free at last! Thank you Coach! There's no one like you, really! ❤❤❤

  • @orlyb90
    @orlyb90 2 роки тому +4

    This message made me cry while I was walking on the treadmill. Thank you so much. God bless.

  • @Sevoflurane2014
    @Sevoflurane2014 9 місяців тому +3

    This sounds dumb but my breakup WAS a blessing no doubt and I still want my ex back. Because this break up prompted me to FIX my issues, focus on myself and started goiig to church more and got baptized! I have a whole new focus and if my ex comes back they will see a whole new person. Have to put in Gods hands.

  • @auruminsanity1600
    @auruminsanity1600 5 років тому +19

    I like listening to you to learn about relationships although I don 't want my ex back. (7 months of NC) but I'm feeling so good with myself now because I realised how miserable I was in that relationship. Thank you.

    • @margomazzeo1680
      @margomazzeo1680 4 роки тому +1

      Its Goodbye to misery..insecurity..and narcissistic abuse tactics..

  • @CalibreNueve95
    @CalibreNueve95 3 роки тому +5

    Damn it. This is the most painful video so far because it's 100% true.

  • @veralindqvist3944
    @veralindqvist3944 3 роки тому +7

    Thank you Coach Lee for this video. Going through a breakup really put things in perspective. I realized I took my family and friends for granted because I devoted all my time and energy to him. I’m still sad and a small part of me wants him back (even though he cheated on me), but I love myself more. I deserve better than that kind of treatment.

    • @mollymc
      @mollymc 3 роки тому

      How are you doing now?

  • @pmdal
    @pmdal Рік тому +1

    Dumped 20 days ago.....what a blessing!No Contact is forever

  • @sarahsousa2504
    @sarahsousa2504 4 роки тому +4

    My God! lol... I was crying like crazy and then, all of a sudden, Coach Lee raises a cup of a super coffee! ... It made me laugh. It was good. And it was also good when you said "I'm still here". It is aching.

  • @marcoaurelioa.4394
    @marcoaurelioa.4394 4 роки тому +10

    I lack the words to convey how much I admire you, your knowledge, your expertise, your insights, your empathy. You've been getting me through the possibly worst period of my life. If I hadn't found you I don't know where my dignity and mental sanity would be by now. Thanks from Italy man, from the deepest of my heart.

  • @francoisouadeba6346
    @francoisouadeba6346 5 років тому +4

    I totally agree with you I been looking for a company store to open my company for 2 years without success, and after 3 days of breakup with my Ex I got the place exactly what I was looking for 🤗🤗🤗 and now things are going very very good. I have no regret of losing her, I just felt disappointed of what she done to me, because I didn’t expect that from her, but in reality breaking up can be blessings if you just take the sadness that they brought to your life and transform it to a positive energy to work on yourself and become a better person

  • @bmorebutterfly5259
    @bmorebutterfly5259 2 роки тому +2

    After 4 years this video is still so relevant.

  • @admorgz
    @admorgz 3 роки тому +3

    Great video, life is very very short. If someone doesn't want you. Just let them go.

  • @dnlperth8243
    @dnlperth8243 2 роки тому +3

    Coach Lee nails it every time no matter what the subject. Thankyou Coach Lee for opening my mind to another perspective on my situation. 3 months since I was dumped by the girl I was going to propose to this coming January on a cruise ship. I had only moved into her place 10 weeks prior to the dumping. Maybe I've been looking at this whole thing the wrong way around. Thankyou Coach Lee 🙏

  • @MrArchitect3
    @MrArchitect3 5 років тому +7

    Coach i love your videos. I became obsessed with your videos on how to get the woman i gave all my heart to back. But for christ sake i gave it all to someone who all of a sudden after 2,5 years decided she doesn't see a future, was tired, want something different in her life, and i want back a person who dumped me, caused me tremendous pain without even speaking to me about this, didn't want to invest in me, wasn't accepting me. I fell so pathetic and i am so mad at my self

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  5 років тому +3

      Pankon, I’m very sorry you are going through this. I’ve been there. I truly wish you the best.

    • @MrArchitect3
      @MrArchitect3 5 років тому +1

      @@RealCoachLee Let's see if the NC will do anything. Thanks coach

  • @danielacanto6164
    @danielacanto6164 5 років тому +6

    ya for me it's been like 7 months or so and learning everyday more and more to let go and focused on now growing and being stronger then my ex. u know that's it's his loss. not mine. in the 4, years together and living together he never truly showed he loved me or supported me in anything. I suffer with difficultys in my life and he never wanted any part if it. it's a blessing for me cause I know in the abuse as well I endured from him and heartache he gave me that I will meet someone 1000% more better for my life. and will b truly happy. I know dint deserve anyone to treat me badly. especially by someone u thought u could trust and gave ur heart too.

  • @Jakecaseyy
    @Jakecaseyy 4 роки тому +3

    once someone says goodbye give them time leave them alone but if they date somone else move tf on never look back thier trash to you

  • @LG-vh2gs
    @LG-vh2gs 4 роки тому +5

    My last relationship was a covert narcissist. It was painful but it was a good riddance. Relationship with a Narc is doomed to fail.

  • @HolisticMotion
    @HolisticMotion 3 роки тому +1

    41 days post breakup. Finally ready to hear this. Been on 1 days already. Have another tomorrow.
    Life will go where is does, they will either be your future, or the lesson for it.
    Take the rose tinted glasses off. Y’all had more problems than you want to admit.

  • @GOLTEB
    @GOLTEB 2 роки тому +2

    After on no contact I've regained my self respect and control then my ex made contact, at that moment I've realized I'm better off on my own. Thank you coach, you have no idea how many of us use your videos to have direction after being dumped.

  • @cherrybacon5154
    @cherrybacon5154 5 років тому +7

    I put everything and anything into the relationship with my Ex and when it ended I felt everything come crashing down. Then bit by bit, day by day I'm beginning to feel more positive about myself and my life than what I did when I was with him! Cherry 🍒

  • @actie6615
    @actie6615 9 днів тому

    I appreciate the small things he did. Such joy I felt at times. And I’m grateful for those.
    HOWEVER:
    Being capable not only to receive/recognize the right type of love but to also have complete peace knowing they “see” me must feel so peaceful. That person is on this planet at this very moment, knowing he’s looking for someone like me, gives me hope. ❤
    I will take my time, heal and grow so the very BEST of me will be ready for the rest of my story.
    Because if I can be grateful in the toughest of situations, then I’ve already won.
    After all, my ex propelled me towards that blessing.
    And I am confident in his decision. Situations out of my control do not define me. Nor did he. I just happen to loose sight of who I was for a moment.
    🙏🏼 for all who are struggling and aching in your heart.

  • @jessecunard6544
    @jessecunard6544 5 років тому +5

    I don't want my future ex-wife back. I now know her true self. I now believe I was blessed that she left. Thanks

    • @Tony-dh
      @Tony-dh 4 роки тому

      I knew my ex was a bit toxic but in the final discard she showed me how toxic she was. I dont think i would even want her back now.

    • @jessecunard6544
      @jessecunard6544 4 роки тому

      @@Tony-dh I'm now divorced and haven't seen her in almost 2 year's

  • @voltigeur
    @voltigeur 2 роки тому +4

    Just found out today that my ex is likely in a rebound relationship... just less than 4 weeks after she initiated the breakup. I feel lost. Finding this video gives me comfort. Maybe it's really a blessing in disguise. Thank you Coach Lee

    • @terezavalencia2908
      @terezavalencia2908 Рік тому

      Truth is they are a rebound or odds are it wont work because they never fully healed althought they may think they are

  • @shayakghosal9992
    @shayakghosal9992 4 роки тому +3

    Exactly Coach Lee,
    As much as it hurts to be away from my partner, her words, attitude and constant insult, it made me realize how for granted I used to take those persons who actually cared for me, and what things actually work for me when it comes to deciding a person whom I prefer to be with. I had never realized that these actually matter to me until I found myself to be irritated and frustrated when this person used to do things like those. Also it was an eye openner to taking certain things less seriously or have a lesser expectation from anyone except myself..... After all I can only make the desired changes by investing in myself, but can't expect anyone else to care for my choices and priorities and make them understand unless they really want to from within.

  • @aylahjaelisrael1331
    @aylahjaelisrael1331 6 років тому +17

    I truly understand your perspective about my break up being a possible blessing. The answer is yes it really could be. Thank you for “shining” this light in another direction so I may get the most understanding from this life changing event I deal with every day until it no longer pains me..Awesome video..Thanks

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  6 років тому +2

      I'm glad to hear it helped Jackie. Please subscribe to my channel!

  • @DigDugDubbs
    @DigDugDubbs 2 роки тому +1

    I’ve wanted to tell her that this is the hardest thing I’ve had to go through in my life. That I didn’t deserve to be treated the way she treated me in the end.
    I’ve been in NC for almost 8 weeks hoping to get something more from her than a happy birthday text(why?), replied thanks.
    Maybe this is a blessing in disguise, maybe something great is just around the corner… maybe it can still be her…
    But now I know why some people say they are over the option of reconciling now in your comments sections. You spoke directly to my soul and you uncorked a bottle of pain and trauma I’ve been filling since this happened on 1/1/22. I deserve that person who stays through all the ups and downs, not just the easy parts.
    It’s a choice, and one I’ll have to think more about now if ever given the option between the two.
    Thank you for broadening my perspective Coach Lee.

  • @IndependentView7
    @IndependentView7 5 років тому +3

    More than a week ago she asked me for space (blind sided). This is not the first time she does this, but I can't do this anymore after 5.5 years of relationship. I need to value myself and move on. Yes, I'm hurting. It's a blessing I was able to watch and analyze your video. I really needed this. Bottom line, I was an asset to her to care for her two children, she's a widow. One sided relationship, I can't think of a way she ever did something extraordinary for me. Bottom line I love her more than she did. God bless everyone.

  • @chaymaaadel1728
    @chaymaaadel1728 6 років тому +10

    A short answer to the video's question is "Definitely Yes!"

  • @Sadandlow-ql7sx
    @Sadandlow-ql7sx 10 місяців тому +1

    I love this advice! I listen only to this guy and Kels Coaching on here, as they are so knowledgeable - They have literally got me through my heartbreak :)

  • @sandrasorci5527
    @sandrasorci5527 6 років тому +16

    Coach Lee I have been watching tons of videos on breakup and finally your videos have captured my interest totally and I hear you! What a blessing!

  • @glamasaurus
    @glamasaurus Рік тому +2

    I vacillate between missing them and knowing they did do me a favor. The relationship near the end was a mess and I couldn't love them into working on it or fixing things because that's just not how people work. I may be sad because I miss someone I thought I knew but I'm more sad that they didn't even see the value in me when they had me.

  • @VideosVonDennis
    @VideosVonDennis 2 роки тому +1

    This is the only honest guy with knowledge when it comes to this topic. Helped me through tough times.

  • @sandrasorci5527
    @sandrasorci5527 6 років тому +15

    I feel your sincerity coach Lee.

  • @ceti7427
    @ceti7427 6 років тому +12

    Thank you Lee for this real perspective.. your heart shows..
    God bless

  • @BuildingBridgesBeyond
    @BuildingBridgesBeyond 6 років тому +12

    I think this is probably a healthier way to go. Trying to convince someone why you’re the right candidate is futile. My friend was looking for a way out and made the smallest thing a reason. So... it was thematic and unpleasant.

  • @Bossjennyb
    @Bossjennyb 4 роки тому +6

    Thank you with all of my heart ♥️
    I need to watch this every day during NC and continue to heal and care for me.
    xo

  • @jfer4299
    @jfer4299 Місяць тому

    Such a cool guy. I like how he sipped his coffee at the end… lol… I honestly believe in everything Coach Lee says he definitely makes so much sense…. I been broken up with my GF for 7 weeks. The pain comes and goes. I get periods of relief which is so refreshing. It actually helps me to keep in mind those moments of relief will be a permanent feeling in time…. If she never reaches out to me to get back together then that will tell me all her I love you and how she would never want to live without me in her life were all lies. That in itself will help me to heal…. Stay strong everyone. It will get better one way or another….

  • @surfkat59
    @surfkat59 Рік тому +1

    Coach: You are a BLESSING. Your videos lift me up. My ex of 12 years kicked me out over a silly text message I was supposed to use to relay to her friends and family about the status of her masectomy 2 months ago. I pleaded with her at the hospital that I NEVER got that text from her. I really never did. But she refused to hear it. 2 weeks later she boots me out. All of our friends including my family members were in shock that she did that. I cried for weeks. I pain daily for my return home to her. Funny thing is that we STILL have stayed in touch 2 weeks afterwards. Very little texting/no contact. I even house sat with our dog for 4 days! Makes no sense. Our convesations in person have been civil. I'm shocked. I know I am not being used. Its not her nature to do that. Im still on her FB page and our pictures are still up on FB and Instagram. My question: What does this all mean? That she just needs space and time in the meanwhile? I pray that she takes me back and find a resolution.

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  Рік тому +1

      She sounds terribly immature to do that to you. I would say that since you two were together for 12 years that this is/was a marriage-like relationship. I have free a mini-course on saving a marriage (or marriage-like relationship) that I suggest you get at myexbackcoach.com/hope-for-marriages-in-crisis/

  • @Alchemist_171
    @Alchemist_171 Рік тому +1

    Coach Lee, you're awesome good sir. I feel so lucky I found your channel.

  • @nisha9160Sac
    @nisha9160Sac 5 років тому +12

    This is exactly what I needed to hear. ❤

  • @harolddasynth795
    @harolddasynth795 Рік тому +1

    This one is the best advice for those people who are going through this painful break up;thanks coach Lee..

  • @brianjacobs8839
    @brianjacobs8839 5 років тому +4

    I am slowly realizing that her dumping me was a blessing. The day when it happened (via email) was two days before my birthday. I was destroyed but it's been a slow recovery. My profile pic is one of hope. Hoping that a special woman will come into my life and we'll have dates like looking at stars. Have a great life each and everyone.

  • @theicewolf714
    @theicewolf714 Рік тому +1

    Out of the hours and hours Watching all your videos as therapy for me helped me through my darkest hours of loss amd sadness of her . Prepping myself to enter NC because I knew the breakup was coming ... your videos helped me prepare amd lessened my anxiety daily listening to uou on my commute back amd forth from work to home where we shared . It was till this video that I had the realization that I was not happy either trying to make her happy , she was soooo much work to make happy and no matter how hard I tried she still wasn't happy personally and professionally , I now know that it was a blessing for me that she initiated the break up and I can truly rebuild and do me and not be exhausted mentally amd physically trying to meet her unachievable high expectations could be very meet , she will see what life is like without me and what I brought to her life. If NC WORKS FOR US. I'm not even sure i want her back to go back to being unhappy myself trying to please her. I do love her. 3 years living together bit I think it's the loss of her I miss but I know this will be a blessing for me to put me 1st. Cheers LEE

  • @cyndemaegentapa467
    @cyndemaegentapa467 5 років тому +7

    Thank you for this Coach! This is So encouraging and comforting to hear. And Yes, when a Break up does happen, It hurts, But Maybe that Relationship has already served its purpose in your life. Just be thankful for the happy times and the lessons we learned.

  • @membering
    @membering 5 років тому +17

    Coach, I'm tired of things not killing me and only making me stronger. 😏

    • @nobody-hr1lo
      @nobody-hr1lo 4 роки тому +2

      Same here...though even with all that pain and wasted time, money and energy, I must confess I'm happy to still stay alive to keep standing to fight and die another day.

  • @МарияАблова-э1ч
    @МарияАблова-э1ч 6 місяців тому +1

    Being dumped by the guy who wanted me to be his mistress.
    After 2 months of no contact I have written a goodbye-letter.
    Just to say" thank you" for all good and wishing him the best. I said that want to date single man only. Lost him but saved my self respect.

    • @ginger96963
      @ginger96963 2 місяці тому

      Why would you be in that situation to start? You have some self work to do if you thought he’d leave her for you or if that’s what you wanted.

  • @nuriasabah5545
    @nuriasabah5545 5 років тому +11

    Lee, you are the best coach ever! Whenever i feel like i'm falling apart i watch your videos and It makes me feel like you are sitting infront of me and giving all these superb advices. Lots of love and prayers for you man!

  • @0090steve
    @0090steve 6 років тому +7

    Coach Lee, Your videos are absolutely the best on youtube. I am currently in the no contact period and my ex of 5 years just stopped texting and calling me back 3 weeks ago. She probably is seeing someone new and that hurts, but I will be fine thanks to you.

  • @wengpatac5536
    @wengpatac5536 2 роки тому +3

    Thank you coach Lee, I'll be great with or without him. You helped me see my value.I always watch your vedios for motivation. Please always be safe and your family! ❤️

  • @jannlewandowski5540
    @jannlewandowski5540 2 роки тому +1

    When I look back, I believe the break up was the best thing for the both of us, especially ME! Thanks Coach Lee!

  • @anthonygonzalez4142
    @anthonygonzalez4142 4 роки тому +1

    Coach Lee is awesome, I've been married 19yrs and my wife just left me without explanation. On father's day we have 3 boys together. 20 ,19 and 7 yrs and I am crushed!

  • @justbreathe_
    @justbreathe_ 3 роки тому +1

    Thank you for this. It’s so amazing to see that you aren’t taking advantage of heartbroken people. You want to help but you are honest that it may not happen for everyone.

  • @thomaswilliams801
    @thomaswilliams801 2 роки тому +1

    Thanks for your help,am on a no contact since 4th of April,and would remain no contact until I hear from my ex girlfriend,am moving on,am seeing someone now and everything is going good.
    My ex is still in my mind, but I will not dump my new girlfriend for her,even though am still in pain,forward ever backward never.when a woman dumped you for another guy you should never go back to her.there are billions of women in this planet.