Joy Seepane ON being a proud side chick of a married man since 23 years ago

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  • Опубліковано 21 вер 2024
  • Production : iamjusticetshabalala (Instagram)
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,4 тис.

  • @bobogona
    @bobogona Рік тому +310

    She was taken advantage of by an older man,groomed her as well.

    • @kwetsephetla3597
      @kwetsephetla3597 Рік тому +51

      Dude her whole life has been on hold for this man😮

    • @yangankenkana5034
      @yangankenkana5034 Рік тому +6

      @@kwetsephetla3597 yes, this is like the SA former press

    • @thabilemayeza6812
      @thabilemayeza6812 Рік тому +5

      Mdala

    • @kwetsephetla3597
      @kwetsephetla3597 Рік тому +8

      @@yangankenkana5034 Yes, with LaC...

    • @TamaraCanham
      @TamaraCanham Рік тому +16

      Ey true this story is weird. But did she not say she was 19. Her boyfriend married someone else and she said it didn't phase her at all. I'm wondering if she is okay but I don't want to sound offensive.

  • @nokwandasbiya6462
    @nokwandasbiya6462 Рік тому +544

    The day this man passes on, Joy will then understand the difference between a wife and a girlfriend.

  • @kwetsephetla3597
    @kwetsephetla3597 Рік тому +148

    That man never intended on marrying her. When men want to marry, they do it. Family can’t even stop them.

  • @charlottehanyane3443
    @charlottehanyane3443 Рік тому +535

    Proof to show that age doesn't necessarily come with wisdom. The delusion!!! Young girls, don't take her stance PLEASE!!!! It's her story, we're clapping for her. I was in a similar situation. He got married and I left, 12 years later, he's still tryana make me a side chick to the woman he cheated on me with and then married! My answer is still " go to the nearest hell, there's a special place for you there". Girls, don't do it. Point, blank and the period

    • @zeemali4369
      @zeemali4369 Рік тому +6

      ✅💯

    • @anastasimankesemokgobu1724
      @anastasimankesemokgobu1724 Рік тому +48

      He is building his family with the wife, as a side chick, when do you get to do that ? Man will always put themselves first shame

    • @antonattachihombori9561
      @antonattachihombori9561 Рік тому +22

      Not all women want to get married.

    • @mahlatse8605
      @mahlatse8605 Рік тому +27

      ​@antonattachihombori9561 so because you don't want to get marry, you choose to be the side? Make that make sense

    • @blackwoman_015
      @blackwoman_015 Рік тому +4

      @@mahlatse8605 good question

  • @ellenm8285
    @ellenm8285 11 місяців тому +43

    God tried saving this woman in the first 3 years by not allowinh her to fall pregnant and yet even after he married someone else she stayed.

  • @thandibaloyi4411
    @thandibaloyi4411 11 місяців тому +64

    Love her, her honesty. She's not sugar coating the truth.

  • @naledimokoena2117
    @naledimokoena2117 10 місяців тому +27

    This woman is actually so smart yoh. You can tell by how she speaks.. shes aware of everything

  • @Explore-ls9ue
    @Explore-ls9ue Рік тому +146

    Who also think that she low-key waited for their marriage to fail so that she can be the wife?

    • @dikeledimogobe5117
      @dikeledimogobe5117 Рік тому +10

      Or the wife to die!

    • @Pinki0134
      @Pinki0134 Рік тому +25

      Imagine giving away 30 years of your life waiting to nurse an old man one day.... There are levels of common sense.

    • @janed51
      @janed51 Рік тому +12

      She will never be the wife
      He will go and marry someone else once again 😂

    • @MarleneSmith-i6b
      @MarleneSmith-i6b Рік тому +5

      She will never be his wife.

    • @maboj384
      @maboj384 Рік тому +4

      My aunt was a sidechick for over 30 years and had 3 kids with the man. The wife died ,and he married her, but the guy died about 5 years after that, so it's a possibility.

  • @nomakulakonza765
    @nomakulakonza765 Рік тому +101

    This lady looks decent, but her thinking capacity is very disappointing

  • @DKs_Journey1
    @DKs_Journey1 Рік тому +82

    If they met ko skolong, she is now 48 and they been together for 23 years, that means she was 48-23=25years🤔🤔. Waitse ke eng, I don't know the colour of tomorrow😮😮

    • @ayandanofumba9865
      @ayandanofumba9865 Рік тому +23

      Also 23 years ago there was neither Form 3, nor standard 8 but GRADE 8.
      Phela year 2000 was 23 years ago, so😂😂
      LIES LIES LIES

    • @cobainbride
      @cobainbride Рік тому +1

      @@ayandanofumba9865 bahahah 🤣🤣🤣

    • @RayOfLetsatsi
      @RayOfLetsatsi Рік тому +5

      The lies are too much shem mmè oo thinks we're stupid. This actually makes her credibility and the whole story questionable.

    • @DKs_Journey1
      @DKs_Journey1 Рік тому +6

      ​@@RayOfLetsatsiher wanting to now get married to an old man is suspicious 😂😂. I never scrutinise things, mara haai!! Dilo ga di kopane.

    • @ziphezinhlecele855
      @ziphezinhlecele855 Рік тому +7

      “Oh, lies, lies, lies and everywhere it’s lies”

  • @kwetsephetla3597
    @kwetsephetla3597 Рік тому +218

    Whatever happens in my life, may I never meet a man like this 🫠🫠

    • @yangankenkana5034
      @yangankenkana5034 Рік тому +5

      It very easy yazi ,add it on your prayer item. ....

    • @kwetsephetla3597
      @kwetsephetla3597 Рік тому

      @@yangankenkana5034 You are right sis. I need to pray that spirit away from ever reaching me.

    • @mashadimokgata871
      @mashadimokgata871 Рік тому +2

      😂😂and they are many like that

    • @bella357
      @bella357 Рік тому +3

      You can simply run away

    • @thembi9645
      @thembi9645 11 місяців тому +4

      This is why I'm even scared to get married, Men are confused shme

  • @walterzikalala
    @walterzikalala 10 місяців тому +73

    Fascinating discussions! I don't sit in judgement of others, rather I always try and understand what drives people to do certain things and behave in a certain manner. This way I learn and grow and I'm the better for for it. Great shows all-round!!!

    • @nonhlanhlamaphumulo980
      @nonhlanhlamaphumulo980 8 місяців тому

      Very interesting. Very humble if all the side chicks had this mindset I would be happy for my husband.

    • @faithing88
      @faithing88 3 місяці тому

      Her life is as confused like the red hair and purple lipstick 😂😂😂

  • @noxxie1496
    @noxxie1496 Рік тому +49

    Judging by the way she's blushing, she's giving obsessed with a man that never truly never loved her.

  • @beautyineverything7273
    @beautyineverything7273 11 місяців тому +41

    As a younger generation. Let's teach our kids self love. i would never put myself through a situation with a man who doesn't know what he wants. Its the delulu ke sana😂😂😂😂

    • @shirlsshirls8594
      @shirlsshirls8594 10 місяців тому +5

      He knows what he wants. He wanted her as a side chick.

    • @nette2144
      @nette2144 10 місяців тому +1

      😂😂😂😂😂

  • @mrsnoma1422
    @mrsnoma1422 Рік тому +61

    She lost me at Grade 10 and member of the ANC… The ANC never loved SA 🤞🏾

  • @reratiloemashakoe2740
    @reratiloemashakoe2740 Рік тому +205

    This lady needs therapy, there’s grooming, anger, poverty, post parturm depression, grief, loss and denial.

  • @marthandapewa9186
    @marthandapewa9186 11 місяців тому +42

    The fact that she is an orphan I feel like the old man took advantage of this beautiful faithful women, not having her parents to fight for her, that family would have treated you better , I feel your pain, you actually went through a lot, but is so grate that you healed and able to talk about your life story, so powerful, God bless you and more Grace

    • @kettykembabazi
      @kettykembabazi 10 місяців тому +6

      Being an orphan doesn’t mean you become a side chick of a married man

    • @thandiephuti7000
      @thandiephuti7000 4 місяці тому +2

      @@kettykembabazi you are right but people are vulnerable, and can be manipulated. you dont have a sense of belonging

    • @jessicathobejane2613
      @jessicathobejane2613 26 днів тому +1

      I think she fell in love with the fatherly love she never got to fully experience since she lost her parents. The feeling of being taken care of and "loved" by a male figure.

  • @boitshepokekana2039
    @boitshepokekana2039 Рік тому +32

    Mam Joy is the girl she thinks she is❤️ She chose well for herself and she is a smart lady. O phela bophelo ba gage man.👌

  • @thulishatilwe4076
    @thulishatilwe4076 Рік тому +215

    Just imagine this being your mother on social media telling people she’s a proud sidekick 😢

  • @etvscandalfanpage2011
    @etvscandalfanpage2011 Рік тому +32

    I'm 10 min already in this video and I already bored by the excuses that this Lady is giving for her Sugar Daddy not to have married her. I mean when a person wants to marry you they do, he just felt comfortable with having a side chick and that's all you are to him. He could have made her his second wife, he still could he just doesn't want to.

  • @joanserumola6070
    @joanserumola6070 Рік тому +171

    Self love is important guys..🌸🌼🌺

    • @triciakekana
      @triciakekana Рік тому +3

      Very imperative

    • @candyalex12
      @candyalex12 Рік тому +3

      The comment I was looking for ❤

    • @nette2144
      @nette2144 Рік тому +1

      Unfortunately some ppl don’t know how to love themselves. I teach many ppl self love everyday. It’s sad to see sis.

    • @aphiwemncube1550
      @aphiwemncube1550 11 місяців тому

      Very important😢

  • @XoliN
    @XoliN Рік тому +21

    Sana, I so wish she could free herself and go look for real love. She’s not that old yet.

  • @batsabilesimelane8679
    @batsabilesimelane8679 Рік тому +164

    when a man wants to marry, nothing can ever stop him, you're just delusional

  • @mmeme5861
    @mmeme5861 Рік тому +60

    I will never forgive myself for listening to this....

  • @mashokelekarabo5078
    @mashokelekarabo5078 Рік тому +49

    My problem with these kinds of stories is that now the child is 18 and gas to watch this nonsense 😢

  • @asandamthembu6275
    @asandamthembu6275 Рік тому +114

    Shes emotionally stuck at whatever year she experienced trauma. This is sad nje more than anything

  • @nyamburamwende
    @nyamburamwende Рік тому +70

    Mentally/emotionally she's talking like a child not a grown woman.

    • @44Buyi
      @44Buyi Рік тому +8

      That is my observation as well..

    • @fillod2613
      @fillod2613 Рік тому +6

      It’s true. She is almost 50 years old but not yet mature.

    • @overstandself9954
      @overstandself9954 7 місяців тому +2

      Dude ngathi shes a teenager who just started dating. Boma 16year old vibes 😢

    • @oolalatoyamanasa5130
      @oolalatoyamanasa5130 2 місяці тому

      Jonga, 16 year olds these days are very mature than this mama ryt here!

  • @mapsy16
    @mapsy16 Рік тому +75

    See how his position in his family and society was protected and prioritised over hers? Our daughters must really understand that they have the right to dream and harbour ambition. That they have meaningful space in the family and community. That in itself is sacred.

    • @nolubynature9513
      @nolubynature9513 Рік тому +1

      ❤❤❤

    • @gabiemnisi
      @gabiemnisi 11 місяців тому +1

      ❤❤ That's so true.I'm saving these words for my daughter 4 when she's older.

  • @MommyLindo
    @MommyLindo Рік тому +125

    When she said "now he loves me too much" yet he still hasn't married her😅😂😂😂 It's giving inganekwane vibez🤞😂

    • @triciakekana
      @triciakekana Рік тому +5

      😂😂😂😂😂 Dudeeeeeee

    • @asanda138
      @asanda138 Рік тому +7

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Its a MESSSSS

    • @ncuminkilitshana1049
      @ncuminkilitshana1049 Рік тому +8

      But she did say he offered to though and she refused..

    • @spokazitshungu9093
      @spokazitshungu9093 Рік тому +1

      Inganekwane sana if you ask me🤣🤣🤣

    • @thelady2379
      @thelady2379 Рік тому +8

      They are both comfortable with whatever that is between them. It's you who has a problem with their affair

  • @mahlohonololebuso741
    @mahlohonololebuso741 Рік тому +108

    This goes to show that even if a man marries you, it does not necessarily mean that he loves you. His heart might be with someone else. There's a saying that most men wish they were with a woman they met once in their lifetime. Pray before you get married and ask God to reveal things that are hidden. Getting married doesn't mean that you won. Promise, being married doesn't mean that you won. A man is not a prize. I hope Promise learned something here...coz she puts her marriage on a pedestal.

    • @ayandasam2269
      @ayandasam2269 Рік тому +35

      There's nothing wrong with Promise putting her marriage on the pedestal ma'am. If u inlove and married be happy, put it out there. If it ends it ends.

    • @tsholofelohuma7496
      @tsholofelohuma7496 Рік тому +14

      U sound very bitter, then why doesn't the man wants to marry u if he loves u so much, ur delusional shame 😅

    • @thandomasango9947
      @thandomasango9947 Рік тому

    • @sindiswapalisompangele8937
      @sindiswapalisompangele8937 Рік тому +5

      Madala really is a politician,

    • @snenhlanhlacele8940
      @snenhlanhlacele8940 11 місяців тому +2

      I disagree getting married does mean victory

  • @yaonemfolwe6305
    @yaonemfolwe6305 Рік тому +16

    Decenter men. Focus on yourself and live your best life. ❤

  • @harrietkamau6710
    @harrietkamau6710 11 місяців тому +29

    I dont blame this lady at all. The man is all she has known all her life. Her first love and apparently the man lived her genuinely. Her late ness in getting a baby complucated things cos being African children were and still are important. I am married but I can still sort if understand her. Shes a bit of a free spirit though and she likes it. Happy ending? Life is a total mystery. Theres no loser here.

  • @tshiamomahape292
    @tshiamomahape292 Рік тому +139

    A dash of embarrassment could hv saved her from wasting her life more even being public about it.

    • @thobilembuli8571
      @thobilembuli8571 Рік тому +18

      Dude. A dash of embarrassment is very important.

    • @queenrammym
      @queenrammym Рік тому +1

      Sisi you are here😂😂😂

    • @tshiamomahape292
      @tshiamomahape292 Рік тому

      @@queenrammym yes 😂

    • @_theerealnono_7694
      @_theerealnono_7694 Рік тому +15

      That's what the world is missing now, shame. No shame at all.

    • @tshiamomahape292
      @tshiamomahape292 Рік тому +4

      @@_theerealnono_7694 Tell me about it. All dz things they not new they been happening but because the moral standard was high they were hidden so u would do wrong and hv shame

  • @auditingtaxmadeeasy5414
    @auditingtaxmadeeasy5414 Рік тому +25

    Uhmm the way she speaks about this khehla. Now I'm dying to know who he is. Just to put a face to the story🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @ndzwakiedaymane9838
    @ndzwakiedaymane9838 Рік тому +19

    its giving dilulu 😭😭😭 therapy therapy therapy!!!!

  • @sheilamogadime8681
    @sheilamogadime8681 Рік тому +24

    Yoh hleng Promise.... Yah neh Mosadi, I vote for you to be President for Women.... You manage to get to the bottom of things and ask provocative questions... Love you mosadi for this kind of content.... This story is so amazing hleng and interesting....

  • @mapelaramafsi6701
    @mapelaramafsi6701 Рік тому +11

    Jesu, leba kwano😲😲Is this really, a true real life story? The things women put up with, just to be in relationships are super hectic😓😱😱This is hectic, Were there no other men in Bushbuckridge to rescue her bathong?

  • @ntandoyolandazwane
    @ntandoyolandazwane Рік тому +19

    There’s a lot I want to say, but I don’t want to be judgemental. The only person who knows if it’s really love or not is the man himself.

    • @danilaroche1156
      @danilaroche1156 10 місяців тому +6

      Having an opinion is NOT judgmental. People don't understand what the word means.

  • @ayandasam2269
    @ayandasam2269 Рік тому +92

    People need to understand this lady was groomed from a young age, then the man chose to marry someone else cause she couldn't convince. I don't think she would have wanted to start another relationship if she felt she's "not woman enough" to bare kids anyway.

    • @anastasimankesemokgobu1724
      @anastasimankesemokgobu1724 Рік тому +14

      But still, continuing with a man who left her to marry another woman doesn't help her. But I get it, she was groomed

    • @jabulisiletugwana6545
      @jabulisiletugwana6545 Рік тому +11

      Agreed. The guy exhibited predatory behaviour from the jump!

    • @Myvillageheaven
      @Myvillageheaven Рік тому +3

      But she is a grown woman now.

    • @ayandasam2269
      @ayandasam2269 Рік тому +7

      @@Myvillageheaven I agree my love, but years and years of abuse any form of abuse the victims start thinking its normal.

    • @Myvillageheaven
      @Myvillageheaven Рік тому +2

      @@ayandasam2269 at 48 she has no excuse I swear,a man doesn't want her but she is trying to prove a point....I feel like it's daddy issues.

  • @athenjiwemdumata1357
    @athenjiwemdumata1357 Рік тому +93

    Sad old woman, fell for a childish and irresponsible man. This is a mess, I’m 29 and I see how childish and disgusting this situation is.

    • @maloasevilakazi3853
      @maloasevilakazi3853 Рік тому

      😂

    • @zamantungwakhumalo7123
      @zamantungwakhumalo7123 11 місяців тому +10

      Grown to learn marriage is doesn't prove love😏How ironic😂😂😂Sadly she might be the happiest human alive just saying🤷🏾

    • @smangelemasengemu8350
      @smangelemasengemu8350 10 місяців тому +2

      That fact that she's is the one that the man married it doesn't mean she was loved.

    • @dudumthimkhulu2615
      @dudumthimkhulu2615 10 місяців тому +4

      Nah Thenji, don't judge. Marriage is not everything. And it doesn't define love. She is probably happier than most married women.

    • @MyJOSE2013
      @MyJOSE2013 9 місяців тому

      48 isn't old age, you ageist Trolls 🚮

  • @THEGODDESSTHEYNEVERSAWCOMING
    @THEGODDESSTHEYNEVERSAWCOMING Рік тому +20

    "Member of ANC"😢 That said it all. Imbalance of power was at a center stage here. Since she was the younger one she took the short end of the stick. Young girls aren't suppose to be with old men. This age is just a number is never beneficial to women.

  • @loratomolaodi6935
    @loratomolaodi6935 11 місяців тому +6

    She is wise, give men freedom, and let them come because they want to. Live your love

  • @nompumelolo
    @nompumelolo Рік тому +44

    Promise you look amazing and your outfit is on point!

  • @magitambo712
    @magitambo712 11 місяців тому +29

    Saying my man I cringed 😬. But with that being said can we all understand what childhood trauma does to the brain even in adulthood (she grew up as an orphan). Childhood trauma can profoundly influence the choices we make in life, she does not see herself as worthy of having her own husband, she did not address the effects of her trauma and heal and now she’s bleeding on this marriage it’s said Someone on the comments said the “delusion” she’s right

    • @nette2144
      @nette2144 10 місяців тому +6

      You are right. Orphans usually get hand me downs. So she has that spirit of fear of not having and would rather have second best. Her childhood may be so traumatic

  • @djsamaria1731
    @djsamaria1731 10 місяців тому +9

    I think people commented before watching the whole interview.
    She won in everything.Gave birth to the heir , is loved by her man.Got her things right.

    • @thatothobejane4674
      @thatothobejane4674 9 місяців тому +1

      She has no security. What happens the day this man dies?

    • @tshedzaravhuhali4969
      @tshedzaravhuhali4969 8 місяців тому

      @@thatothobejane4674 she can actually claim from his pension fund.

    • @overstandself9954
      @overstandself9954 7 місяців тому +1

      Ai suka bra, this is just trash ayikho indaba yalomama plain and simple.

  • @pheliswamdoda8120
    @pheliswamdoda8120 Рік тому +112

    This hurts me to the core,my friend's marriage was destroyed by the side chick , she was his first girlfriend but never married her even after the divorce. Men are wicked and will make you believe in something that is not even there.That man doesn't love her but feeding to his man ego😢

    • @dot510
      @dot510 Рік тому +36

      He does not love the wife either.

    • @Meandyouisnus
      @Meandyouisnus 11 місяців тому +30

      Since when do men love anyone but themselves. So the tell you that they love you and you believe them🤣🤣🤣

    • @ikhowaka1471
      @ikhowaka1471 11 місяців тому +1

      He loves her ..the child issue.

    • @ikhowaka1471
      @ikhowaka1471 11 місяців тому

      ​@@Meandyouisnusmy sister men love...my dad met my mom 55 years ago. My dad gave her a job as his secretary the same day.. ...I was born and they been married 55 years and still together. Men love and love has no formula....it's luck and God.

    • @Patriciaedwards-w1u
      @Patriciaedwards-w1u 10 місяців тому

      No man cld manipulate me that long once he marry the next lady that wld be my quit and value myself.the man only use her sex object I don't know how she's smiling in such trauma.wheres u common sense .I'd be so ashamed.

  • @nonhlanhlamaphumulo980
    @nonhlanhlamaphumulo980 8 місяців тому +7

    Others are here judging her yet they are in marriages for the wrong reasons. With her it was pure love with no intentions to suck in good times and exit in bad times. Yet she is ready to settle when the fame of the old man is gone. That's true love against all odds. Judge her all you want but sge spoke her truth unloke those who are married to prove a point. Others treat marriage as validation of some sort forgetting that its love then marriage but today we see people go marry people for what they have...money then marriage.
    She is how love should be and she never gave up. She also spoke about choosing not to get married after she was ridiculed because she wasn't going to have kids this story is one of the kind. Third time around she is ready....Love wins not materialistic marriages that we now see.

  • @connymontsho
    @connymontsho 8 місяців тому +5

    I think they are already planning the wedding.She said now AM MARRYING THE MAN OF MY DREAMS,then she said IF I DECIDE😊

    • @overstandself9954
      @overstandself9954 7 місяців тому

      Umhlolo sesi. She is delusional for real yoh.

  • @tshidithompson
    @tshidithompson Рік тому +21

    The man never wanted to marry her. Why didn't the other woman have to prove that she can have babies as well 😢

  • @mwilliams4545
    @mwilliams4545 11 місяців тому +6

    I admire the fact that she has been with this one man, for her adult life, she is very patient. I wish her all the best. O hope she will make Jesus the center of her life. God bless

  • @busiluthando451
    @busiluthando451 Рік тому +89

    Everyone must understand that not everyone wants to get married. She made her choices and she's happy about it, so who are you to judge. I salute her for standing by her truth.

    • @antonattachihombori9561
      @antonattachihombori9561 Рік тому +1

      Exactly

    • @zintlenjoli2981
      @zintlenjoli2981 Рік тому +41

      People who don't want to get married don't want to experience the pain that they cause to married women.
      Calling out rubbish is not judging, it's challenging the wrong doer to take accountability of their actions and not delight in hurting others.
      Singaphela ngabo don't judge while things get ruined.

    • @busiluthando451
      @busiluthando451 Рік тому +5

      @@zintlenjoli2981 thats your opinion but nothing is going to change about her situation. She's still living her truth whether we agree with it or not.

    • @tsholofelomocumi4207
      @tsholofelomocumi4207 Рік тому +27

      @@busiluthando451 she may be living HER truth like you say, but in the long run, this truth is going to cost her dearly. There are things in life that are FORBIDDEN,and one of those things is to get involved with a married person.

    • @zintlenjoli2981
      @zintlenjoli2981 Рік тому +20

      @tsholofelomocumi4207 Exactly, we live in times where doing the wrong things are considered right, and doing the right thing like calling out a person for their destructive behavior is considered wrong.

  • @maxinesoles5800
    @maxinesoles5800 11 місяців тому +9

    Married men usually lie a lot so u can't take his word that he is discussing or doing anything that he says. The fact that his wife took care of child actually makes him love his wife more. This man has the best of both worlds. She must have low self esteem to settle for such a long time.

  • @E-newsNamibia
    @E-newsNamibia Рік тому +11

    It's giving lies... Who doesn't want to get married especially when the men marries another person.... May I never live a life of lies 😮

  • @misstidimalo
    @misstidimalo Рік тому +14

    This lady was groomed by that man and she is in his mental prison hence "dilulu" is all over her psychologically. What a sad life, I feel sorry because she has never lived a full life of honour as a woman

  • @ms.seipatisekokotoana6694
    @ms.seipatisekokotoana6694 7 місяців тому +3

    I love this lady, she seems not malicious its just that life is complicated..

  • @mosesMongale-d6d
    @mosesMongale-d6d Рік тому +37

    I don't think she should be seen as a side chick. It devalues her integrity. She, for all purposes and intent, the man's wife. It's just that things did not unfold as per expectations. She has taken her own particular way in love life, a respectable way I must add. I respect her immensely.

  • @onwabiseonniegudu2309
    @onwabiseonniegudu2309 Рік тому +13

    This lady is delulu I swear🤞
    Mrs Law's laugh proves the point 😂😂.
    Gogo "Mamkhulu" is very old and very proud to be on tick tok bashing women who choose marriage.

  • @lifewithqueenSolo
    @lifewithqueenSolo Рік тому +16

    I don't understand this level of Love these ladies has for this Man. Yhu, Ha A! There's no way I can be in their position, I don't have that kind of love. I hope Joy & her son are listed as beneficiaries. Because it would be tragic for this Man to die & Joy is stripped of everything.

  • @gpmjozi706
    @gpmjozi706 11 місяців тому +11

    I love this story.... i like how my sister took it and how she treated it

    • @thelightindarkness175
      @thelightindarkness175 11 місяців тому

      Owning her truth!! I love it for her😍And Promise mastering the interview, asking relevant questions as always 🎊❤️

  • @triciakekana
    @triciakekana Рік тому +29

    23 years as a sidechick and shes proud of it wow....Talk about Shallowness

  • @PalesaSawukazi-fc9mk
    @PalesaSawukazi-fc9mk Рік тому +11

    I understand her case she didn’t date a already married man she was not the chosen one

  • @makisingo8009
    @makisingo8009 Рік тому +11

    Girls as long as we are still emotional about these issues...we are not winning....we must be sober ( logic)
    And let's stop the judgment as well.

    • @NellyN159
      @NellyN159 Рік тому +1

      You are very wise my dear

    • @nontongulube
      @nontongulube 11 місяців тому +2

      You are right,truth is this woman is not a side chic she's a wife,it's actually a family only that she's not legally married,

  • @Ngunikaz
    @Ngunikaz 11 місяців тому +44

    Some level of self love, self respect is necessary

  • @tiisetsonkoane6655
    @tiisetsonkoane6655 Рік тому +11

    The Host finishing this ladies sentences is sending me😂😂 like get to the point..
    totally enjoyed this interview

  • @chai08235
    @chai08235 Рік тому +47

    I can't believe how naive our sisters are. No self love. That husband is so selfish

    • @Vv-fl2rm
      @Vv-fl2rm Рік тому

      Even the wives staying in such situations have no self love whatsoever it’s the empty validation that all women ( wives sidechicks etc) get from men.

    • @princessconny1358
      @princessconny1358 Рік тому +3

      I feel like even this man doesn't have selfove shame if he is able to put himself through this then he also need help

    • @ndeledorothy3858
      @ndeledorothy3858 10 місяців тому

      ANC men😅😅

  • @daphneparkinson9020
    @daphneparkinson9020 11 місяців тому +40

    This woman is real... tells it as it is. She knows what she wants and did not let anyone or anything control her.

    • @bathos22
      @bathos22 11 місяців тому +5

      What she wanted was marriage. He did not marry her yet she still stayed. How is this not being controlled?

    • @Rohoboth
      @Rohoboth 11 місяців тому +2

      She is the wife. If the mother was not controlling, the guy would have made his own decisions

    • @Rohoboth
      @Rohoboth 11 місяців тому

      1st wife witchcraft 😂😂😂

    • @daphneparkinson9020
      @daphneparkinson9020 11 місяців тому

      @@Rohoboth exactly

    • @PagesbyPaige
      @PagesbyPaige 11 місяців тому

      A bit on the side is a condiment.
      A wife is the meal.
      You can discard the condiment, but not the meal.

  • @kiito_s_World
    @kiito_s_World Рік тому +71

    Only those who have experienced similar issues understand this. A man can marry someone they do not love due to other reasons

    • @zukhanyefunani4973
      @zukhanyefunani4973 Рік тому +11

      What reasons are those? I’m crurious

    • @candyalex12
      @candyalex12 Рік тому +17

      And they can also leave whenever they want. He gets everything he wants from her without her requiring much, that’s why he is wasting her time for 23 years. Nothing will stop a man to be with the woman he wants to be, not even his wife and kids.

    • @Sheilzdarlingz
      @Sheilzdarlingz Рік тому

      Selflessness emadodeni😢

    • @dot510
      @dot510 Рік тому

      @@zukhanyefunani4973 Many men marry women they do not love for societal status, family pressure or simply their own selfish reasons. Women! we have to stop thinking marriage is a price, the "He chose me" attitude hence I'm special. Married women who care have been warning us for years. What do we say? They are jealous! Oh no just because it happend to her does n't mean it's gonna happen to me. When are we ever going to learn?
      When are we going to stop teaching our daughters nonsense? We setting them up to fail. One day I asked a few young boys what they want to be when they become older. You know what they say? They want to be Elon Must. Elon Must is a filthy rich billionare who is also a divorcee with many children. I asked them about marriage, they don't want to get married. It did not start with these young boys. It just saddened me that there are THERE ARE MOTHERS WHO ARE BUSY TEACHING THEIR DAUGHTERS ABOUT WINNING A MAN's heart.
      We are bringing agony to our own selves by forcing being special, and sadly the younger generation of women.These men are calculating and we are busy with being naive. I believe this woman, this man married the other woman for family not for love. He managed to preserve his bloodline and keep the woman of his dreams at the same time.
      African families are mostly about preserving the family and bloodline, if that is at risk, to hell with love or anything, bloodline first.

    • @maiyeukai9346
      @maiyeukai9346 Рік тому +13

      ​@@candyalex12very true...anyone who thinks being a side chick is alright must be sick in the head. Its either them or their mama are side chicks

  • @pheliswamdoda8120
    @pheliswamdoda8120 Рік тому +17

    Whenever I'm free,i watch your content as it deals with real issues and may you grow and have bigger stage where you have live audience 🙏❤

  • @bobogona
    @bobogona Рік тому +18

    This man did’nt really want to marry her at all,even after having a child with her he still did’nt make her a second wife,he is just a Peado who took advantage of a young girl but in her adulhood I blame her for staying and not ending this relationship.

    • @antonattachihombori9561
      @antonattachihombori9561 Рік тому

      She refused to marry him!

    • @bobogona
      @bobogona Рік тому +1

      @@antonattachihombori9561 So she says,mdala is not there to confirm that statement,also why would he marrying her has to come with conditions of whether she is woman enough to bear children or not?

    • @dorothylerato8605
      @dorothylerato8605 8 місяців тому

      🤔🤔🙁

  • @sinahmoakofhi5774
    @sinahmoakofhi5774 Рік тому +39

    Having listened to the whole story, it is not that of a bad story and an arrangement. Lets admit she learnt things and made an informed decision. She also valued her independence.

  • @zelokuhlegina5886
    @zelokuhlegina5886 Рік тому +94

    One thing about this man is that he plays the woman in the name of the family

    • @yangankenkana5034
      @yangankenkana5034 Рік тому +1

      Yaa that might be the case. Maybe he was the one who want to marry someone with a kid ..how come it was easy like that after a baby even the family just like that. ...

  • @bon7283
    @bon7283 Рік тому +89

    My heart broke for her when she said she did not have enough time to prove herself💔
    To have developed such an impression of yourself at such a young age.

    • @nandimzanzi
      @nandimzanzi Рік тому +2

      A lot of what she is saying is not consistent. She dated this guy when he was married.

    • @nolubynature9513
      @nolubynature9513 Рік тому

      Yoh

  • @thedooropenerlajames5602
    @thedooropenerlajames5602 11 місяців тому +21

    This is an excellent show. Very unique for women to speak on these types of relationships. Very interesting and educational.

    • @enn4983
      @enn4983 11 місяців тому

      Some like this one, are defeated relationships !!!!

  • @nonhlakaniphosibiya
    @nonhlakaniphosibiya Рік тому +16

    😂😂wow South Africa is a movie Yoo-hoo. She was suppose to say when a man doesn’t want to marry you he won’t marry you when advising us. But team home wrecker nje side chick wife mamakhulu 😮

  • @paulanicolethomason7252
    @paulanicolethomason7252 Рік тому +19

    Sending her my best vibes. 🤎

  • @katlegonkadimeng6443
    @katlegonkadimeng6443 Рік тому +49

    Either she is lying or they dealt with her traditionally very early

    • @bmshik
      @bmshik Рік тому

      Chemi

    • @rethabilemotshwane397
      @rethabilemotshwane397 Рік тому +1

      Getting out of Bush helped weaken whatever they used on her not to conceive all that time

    • @katlegonkadimeng6443
      @katlegonkadimeng6443 Рік тому +4

      They way the have access and control of her baby from day 1 even now shame

    • @mvelomt6015
      @mvelomt6015 Рік тому +3

      Uloyiwe loMama 🙆🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️

    • @lindathomo1799
      @lindathomo1799 Рік тому +2

      Looks like that coz ahe keeps emphasizing that they love each other deeply

  • @m.moodley
    @m.moodley Рік тому +61

    The wife calls her Mamkhulu 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
    The wife is secretly winning 😅 she’ll keep calling the Delulu one Mamkhulu but on paper she is the one who has all the wife benefits 😭God forbid the man dies

    • @ntebokarabelo
      @ntebokarabelo Рік тому +8

      Ma’am, the delulu here is unmatched🙉
      Absolutely not the solulu though, please

    • @triciakekana
      @triciakekana Рік тому +3

      Everything goes to the wife😂😂

    • @mamellomosase9448
      @mamellomosase9448 Рік тому +7

      Nope. My grandmother almost fainted coz all her life she thought she'd get everything coz she's the wife. If a woman makes a man pay child support nothing is released until all the kids he's paying for are present and everything is shared equally. They can even claim the house you live in if your husband owned it or you're married in community of property.

    • @mahlatse8605
      @mahlatse8605 Рік тому

      ​​​@@mamellomosase9448that is not true. According to the law, in community of property, the wife always gets 50% of all assets in case of divorce, and 100% in the case of death unless otherwise stated in a will. Your grandmother most likely never registered her marriage. And why would a wife have her husband pay child support in the 1st place?

    • @ncuminkilitshana1049
      @ncuminkilitshana1049 Рік тому

      ​@@mamellomosase9448yes, people need to check the law before making comments on benefits of wives vs sidechicks..the law is just in this area and the husband can always nominate the side to inherit, the family and wife will have no say, the law will prevail qha!

  • @ayandasam2269
    @ayandasam2269 Рік тому +30

    But some of us we know women who've been side chick for years some have 2-3 kids. And they ok with it, sidechick from that age group didn't mind. Only sidechicks of today attack the wives for no reason.

    • @yangankenkana5034
      @yangankenkana5034 Рік тому +1

      So true, Yaz I am coming from that family, nothing new and our parent were hurting but definitely not like us. There were bit stronger than us.

  • @christinanxumalo6811
    @christinanxumalo6811 11 місяців тому +3

    Thanks to isithembu for giving Joy the strength and wisdom to make meaningful decisions.

  • @SisLinaM
    @SisLinaM Рік тому +8

    I think this lady loved and respected uMamkhulu(1st wife) inside of her mind lives a child shame kodwa in reality she’s just old wethu. Makayeke udika😄😄

  • @SthokoK
    @SthokoK Рік тому +26

    To the people that are condemning her, was she supposed to just fall behind whereas she was there first, she never took anyobody's husband, she just continued living her life and I commend her for it!

    • @candyalex12
      @candyalex12 Рік тому +1

      We all have choices in life, she had choices.

    • @esthermumba525
      @esthermumba525 Рік тому +1

      The man never had good intentions for her and he saw the desperation in her.
      Met you before her, but you have now graduated from side chick to side hen over the years😮😮😅😅

    • @nduvhoprisca4968
      @nduvhoprisca4968 11 місяців тому +3

      She is lying this one. She is 48 dated the guy 23 years in grade 12?. Do the math.

    • @nduvhoprisca4968
      @nduvhoprisca4968 11 місяців тому +1

      She should have been 25 or 26 while in grade 10. Come on.

    • @PA-vq2jt
      @PA-vq2jt 10 місяців тому

      Yeah , but he took 2 wives😅 and she’s now ready too marry if he asks… this isn’t normal

  • @thelmakingly5995
    @thelmakingly5995 Рік тому +92

    This woman was a main chick turned side chick. She didn’t start as a side. This was full relationship and there was genuine love, if they hadn’t been told they couldn’t have kids she could’ve been the wife

    • @zethesjourney4389
      @zethesjourney4389 Рік тому +12

      What's your point exactly?

    • @Blessed224
      @Blessed224 Рік тому +13

      ​@@zethesjourney4389She's trying to justify ths woman's actions

    • @sihlesihle6838
      @sihlesihle6838 Рік тому +6

      What come first??? Marriage or kids

    • @itumelengmokoena9933
      @itumelengmokoena9933 Рік тому +31

      If man wants to make you his wife he will regardless...

    • @ncuminkilitshana1049
      @ncuminkilitshana1049 Рік тому +1

      ​@@Blessed224elaborate because you are bold for this statement!

  • @EleanorHozeh
    @EleanorHozeh Рік тому +29

    Love her for standing by her unconventional uncomfortable truth❤

  • @Inprogress_of_newbeginings
    @Inprogress_of_newbeginings 8 місяців тому +1

    WHAT A STORY!! Claps a lot 👏🏽 .
    Life is not lived in a straight line.
    This woman is brave to have left her son in a dangerous situation that left people injured.

  • @deemanase512
    @deemanase512 11 місяців тому +5

    When a man cheats its his business. Its important to be yourself. Love yourself and live a life. Your identity is in God not with a man.

  • @smangelemasengemu8350
    @smangelemasengemu8350 10 місяців тому +3

    You're a wise woman, i think lot of ppl commented without listening till the end.

    • @Nokutenda774
      @Nokutenda774 Місяць тому

      The end is more confusing, what do you mean?

  • @DKs_Journey1
    @DKs_Journey1 Рік тому +40

    @mrs law your words are powerful. I love that, " my husband is not that powerful for me to betray myself" I yes you girl😍😍

  • @thembimabaso4614
    @thembimabaso4614 Рік тому +14

    If patience was a person

  • @thatojulia7323
    @thatojulia7323 Рік тому +11

    Everytime promise says “Ohkaay”…💀😂😂😂😂

  • @cathrinemocheko3239
    @cathrinemocheko3239 Рік тому +4

    I've never seen a confused person like this lady shem

  • @busisiwematshoba3011
    @busisiwematshoba3011 Рік тому +8

    Already it is known I am carrying a boy child 😒😒sadiki lomama

  • @phutimorifi7237
    @phutimorifi7237 Рік тому +21

    Its her involving God is all this mess .

  • @sibonisilemthyimunye1414
    @sibonisilemthyimunye1414 Рік тому +3

    Hayi she like the word 'remember'
    Yhooooo she is remembering a lot....,🤣🤣

  • @nanynkechinyere-nkechi510
    @nanynkechinyere-nkechi510 10 місяців тому +10

    Well ... her story it's different from many. She's the first. Unfortunately, fertility issues, family being poke she ended up "side chick"!
    23 years and counting .... Love comes in different forms and shapes. 💘

  • @kedibonemohale1802
    @kedibonemohale1802 Рік тому +17

    What a mess..... And the pride she has on her face ka story se sa gage😂😂😂😂

  • @noziphondzukula2460
    @noziphondzukula2460 Рік тому +3

    This Lady made choice and she knew what she was doing and got comfortable in it...at some point best choice...she knew she was a 2nd best

  • @sethushabangu
    @sethushabangu Рік тому +14

    Tsine base Nelspruit asimati losisi😢😢😂😂

  • @ashlerwurayai5204
    @ashlerwurayai5204 5 місяців тому +1

    Ladies listen up , if you don't want side chick drama stay single please. Most African men can't survive with one woman you should let this brutal reality sink!!! If a married men chooses to have a side chick it's the mans fault ,he is the one who went out looking for that other woman. I am also a very proud side chick , I have 2 kids by him and I'm happy to be honest . So If you don't want side chick drama and baby mama drama never involve yourself with a man in this life , most men are not faithful ,they always disappoint so STAY SINGLE if you can't handle it!!!

  • @kgothatsokgthegirl2969
    @kgothatsokgthegirl2969 11 місяців тому +5

    I like her honesty and openness

  • @thato9272
    @thato9272 Рік тому +39

    The age and the years...the math is not mathing😏

    • @boniswamatlaletsa9340
      @boniswamatlaletsa9340 Рік тому +4

      It's not make sure 😂😂😂

    • @bellatalkssa405
      @bellatalkssa405 Рік тому +5

      Yeah maan cause go cho o na le 27 a bala form 3 that was not there in the year 2000 ..... cause a re they dated for 3 yras then fell pregnant. Very delulu this one

    • @Zintlle
      @Zintlle Рік тому +2

      @@bellatalkssa405 and she first said she was in Grade 10 then later when asked what the age was, are 19/20

    • @lindathomo1799
      @lindathomo1799 Рік тому +2

      She was hesitant about her age I think she older than 48