Compilation Of Michael’s Best Jokes About Planes And Airports | Michael McIntyre

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  • Опубліковано 25 лис 2024

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  • @AviationTV
    @AviationTV 5 років тому +675

    "Don't you want my passport?"
    "No need sir, we can see the way you handled the rope system. Welcome home!"

  • @moubhattacharyya1141
    @moubhattacharyya1141 5 років тому +885

    He is so observant and has perfect timing in blending humour with the everyday situations of life.

    • @jess8153
      @jess8153 4 роки тому +13

      Kevin McCusker well you’re such a jolly person aren’t you ?

    • @hodb3906
      @hodb3906 4 роки тому +4

      Kevin McCusker he is not that rich you tosspot. His jokes are spot on to reality. How old are you?

    • @unity1016
      @unity1016 4 роки тому +1

      Do you remember David Brenner? That was his thing, too.

    • @marionthompson3365
      @marionthompson3365 Рік тому

      Yes, he reminds me a little of Dave Allen.

  • @terraformer_141
    @terraformer_141 5 років тому +2291

    He's one of the few comedians that actually make me laugh 😂

    • @tjm6086
      @tjm6086 5 років тому +5

      热带 same

    • @jjwy4tt215
      @jjwy4tt215 5 років тому +6

      Same 😂 he make s me laugh 😂😂😆😆 real hard

    • @jamesboldcomedy6914
      @jamesboldcomedy6914 5 років тому +2

      I agree with you - but I try my best to be as good as him - in a different way!

    • @Mortum_Rex
      @Mortum_Rex 5 років тому +4

      What about Trump?

    • @jamesboldcomedy6914
      @jamesboldcomedy6914 5 років тому +8

      @@Mortum_Rex He makes me want to cry😏

  • @bryantinio2929
    @bryantinio2929 4 роки тому +624

    Can we take a moment to appreciate the person who has to move the spotlight around the stage as Michael is running around?

    • @jones6613
      @jones6613 4 роки тому +20

      Must have real buff arms after a while

    • @chesh1rek1tten
      @chesh1rek1tten 4 роки тому +19

      My friend who's a light technician for the local state theatre said exactly that when I showed him this clip ^^

    • @peeet
      @peeet 3 роки тому +5

      And the camera!

    • @Adogdoingdogthings
      @Adogdoingdogthings 3 роки тому +5

      They must have practiced or done it quite a lot

    • @mli3728
      @mli3728 3 роки тому +1

      defi a full-time job, confirmed!

  • @gillygerbilchillman3281
    @gillygerbilchillman3281 5 років тому +104

    Love Michael's humour...he's so funny and without being vulgar or swearing excessively. Just a brilliant comic and entertainer

  • @OLGMC
    @OLGMC 5 років тому +3351

    The real winner is that person who’s bag comes first on the belt and leaves the exit first 😅

    • @jemmaj2919
      @jemmaj2919 5 років тому +17

      Lol i dont even check in my little suitcase

    • @NerdX151
      @NerdX151 5 років тому +95

      That feeling when you are the second person to get your bag, and then the person in front of you gets pulled over by the customs officer. I WIN, SUCKER!

    • @jhcfight
      @jhcfight 5 років тому +20

      The reason why I mostly travel with hand luggage only that I can skip the belt waiting. Even the customs goes quicker that way.

    • @andreeaafuni4999
      @andreeaafuni4999 5 років тому +31

      Oh I was that person once! It is indeed a wonderful feeling, it brings a spark of joy, but alas i believe one only gets to experience it only once in a lifetime...

    • @kimbo5260
      @kimbo5260 5 років тому +17

      Mine didn't even came bc apparently there's been a worker strike and mine happened to be one of very few that didn't get delivered to the belt. I ended staying in the airport for an extra 2 hours only to be sent home and get my suitcase the next day. Good thing I had pyjama with me.

  • @arlena3297
    @arlena3297 5 років тому +708

    The passport thing is so accurate

    • @NerdX151
      @NerdX151 5 років тому +44

      I went to the airport once wearing a new jacket, where I placed my passport in the inner pocket. What I didn't realize was that the pocket was much deeper than it felt like. I think I burned 10 days worth of calories in my body from the sheer panic when I suddenly couldn't feel my passport. lol

    • @nikiryan8648
      @nikiryan8648 6 місяців тому +1

      misplaced mine coming back from Ireland....total panic mode until I found it in pocket of jacket I had taken off.

  • @cocochanel3074
    @cocochanel3074 5 років тому +306

    I also like the fact that his comedy is for everyone. Funny and adorable!!

    • @rhig4081
      @rhig4081 5 років тому +3

      Coco Chanel it's all so relatable.

  • @catherines2544
    @catherines2544 5 років тому +904

    The funny thing about the race to get off the plane is that....usually you can't go anywhere. So everyone rushes to get up, get their stuff, then ends up just standing there for another half hour impatiently waiting, trying to hold their place in the aisle for themselves and their family/friends.

    • @floatingstarfish932
      @floatingstarfish932 5 років тому +50

      Or they barge off the plane... and get on to the bus which waits until all the passengers are on before it leaves for the terminal!

    • @eb7446
      @eb7446 5 років тому +35

      I never play this game on any transport. Trains, nope let everyone what's the point? They can stress out, I will just sit here thanks.

    • @jemmaj2919
      @jemmaj2919 5 років тому +20

      On my last plane, the flght was one hour late, which meant i could miss my transition flight, this stupid woman next to me sitting on the aisle seat, felt entitled to sit and wait cuz she has nothing to rush for, i had to push her out. If u'r sitting on an aisle seat dont assume ppl have nothing to do next

    • @NerdX151
      @NerdX151 5 років тому +14

      If you are on a domestic chinese flight, you can also expect to see old grannies trying open the doors themselves and slap the flight attendants when they tell them to let the business class passengers off first. It is a fight to the death xD

    • @jhcfight
      @jhcfight 5 років тому +6

      It would be funny if everybody stayed in their seat, so that flight attendants really have to ask everybody to go off.

  • @xplayman
    @xplayman 5 років тому +722

    The queuing system at the end of the video is so true! :D As Americans, we do the over the rope thing. When we went to Dubai we saw British people walking the whole queue. In Bali, we saw Australians doing the sideways squat underneath the rope and we continued to do our over the rope "Yeehaw."

    • @helgaioannidis9365
      @helgaioannidis9365 5 років тому +125

      Yes and being a German I actually would have opted for opening and closing the rope thing accurately. My Italian friends would have opened it and just leave it open for the ones behind...

    • @jemmaj2919
      @jemmaj2919 5 років тому +39

      😆😆😆us brits just have so much manners

    • @liamamundson7696
      @liamamundson7696 5 років тому +30

      Yep, you got us aussies down pat there mate. This happens all the time at our Sizzler's and Centrelinks too

    • @zubairibrahim3795
      @zubairibrahim3795 5 років тому +9

      Helga Ioannidis loool the Italian thing is the one I can relate to 🤣🤣🤣

    • @tanya9112
      @tanya9112 5 років тому +19

      I will often slink under the rope Aussie, Aussie,Aussie!😂

  • @munga1111
    @munga1111 5 років тому +790

    The fun reason the blinds need to be open for take-off and landing: During these times the likelyhood of an incident increases dramatically, in the event the aircraft crashes on take-off or landing and the fuselage remains intact, then rescuers will need to be able to look inside, so open your blinds.

    • @Jedi_Spartan
      @Jedi_Spartan 5 років тому +146

      Jack Whitehall: If something were to go wrong with the engine, you are the pilot's eyes. I beg your pardon! I'm not ready for that responsibility! And no one told me this when I purchased the ticket, I was under the impression that I would be travelling under the capacity of passenger not copilot!

    • @Jedi_Spartan
      @Jedi_Spartan 5 років тому +30

      @@TheDreamingofFreedom I didn't say anything, I was just quoting Jack Whitehall.

    • @NsTheName
      @NsTheName 5 років тому +93

      That and your eyes need to be adjusted to the light outside of the plane. You can't pause in the doorway blinking, you need to get out fast. (former stewardess ^^)

    • @lizvlx
      @lizvlx 5 років тому +48

      well - there is a far more common reason - inn case something goes wrong with the engines (not that rare) - like malfunction alert lights up in cockpit, the flight attendants need to check the engines if they are really malfunctioning or if it is a false alert. same with flaps not engaging correctly etc. that visual check is happening quite often, passengers just dont notice.

    • @leavoda3791
      @leavoda3791 5 років тому +12

      Well that's not comforting, not by a long shot....

  • @McLeanAmy
    @McLeanAmy 5 років тому +2246

    I've only just realised why passports are called passports...

    • @pauljordan4452
      @pauljordan4452 5 років тому +109

      Passing through the port?

    • @tillyboos
      @tillyboos 5 років тому +89

      LOLOLOLOL.....it actually dates back to biblical times when Nehemiah in the Old Testament requested a letter for "safe passage" from King Artaxerxes I of Persia, when he was traveling to Judea (which is today part of modern-day Israel) so passports literally mean "safe passage."

    • @tillyboos
      @tillyboos 5 років тому +36

      @@pauljordan4452 In medieval Europe, that's precisely what it meant when people passed through the gates (or portes, as they were known then) of the medieval walled cities.

    • @JustinCase99999
      @JustinCase99999 5 років тому +23

      @@tillyboos porte is just the french word for gate or door. Passport comes from French passeport. Port is a seaport, but it also meant any type of passage you had to pass through.

    • @tillyboos
      @tillyboos 5 років тому +13

      Justin Case Yes, I speak some French, so I knew that. And it’s interesting because the evolution of the Passport throughout history is from a myriad number of sources.

  • @evillyn7895
    @evillyn7895 5 років тому +294

    Michael can make anything hilarious.

    • @evillyn7895
      @evillyn7895 5 років тому +1

      @@Peter-pg8qn
      That's not funny.

  • @Triss_Joy
    @Triss_Joy 5 років тому +155

    Yup, 100% can confirm: Americans yeehaw right over that s***.😂

    • @lunarcorpse
      @lunarcorpse 5 років тому +3

      I don't. I go through the whole thing.

    • @brynnabeloved
      @brynnabeloved 5 років тому +4

      Somehow I do it the British way. I'm from Michigan.

    • @krissy20634
      @krissy20634 5 років тому +6

      I lived in texas and now Maryland, usa. I walk the whole thing. If anything I am getting to the age where that is the only option. I cant get my leg up that far safely and if I go under I cant get back up

    • @toberkhalid7133
      @toberkhalid7133 5 років тому +1

      @@krissy20634 what are you kris YOUNG. JK

    • @krissy20634
      @krissy20634 5 років тому

      @@toberkhalid7133 if I have lots of time I will follow the ropes, if not I skip

  • @AlienSensei
    @AlienSensei 5 років тому +138

    Regarding the blinds, I had mine half-closed during landing because the sunlight was kinda slow-cooking my crotch through the window and one of the stewardess asked me to open it all the way up. I asked why and she answered so that if there's something wrong with the engine or wings, the passenger could notice it and let the flight crew know immediately.
    "Alright then. If one of the wings comes off I'll let you know."

    • @Dragon-ze6gp
      @Dragon-ze6gp 4 роки тому

      Aditya Purwanto lmao what did she say

    • @Asmrfirstt
      @Asmrfirstt 4 роки тому +1

      Jack Whitehall fan here love stealing jokes

    • @joshuagarnham9703
      @joshuagarnham9703 2 роки тому

      @@Asmrfirstt “I beg your fucking pardon”

    • @forgeustiss6667
      @forgeustiss6667 Рік тому +1

      You do understand that most mechanical issues occur at take off or landing, tight? And problems with engines require early a visual confirmation to the flight deck.
      And don't bother mentioning the wing fell off if the plane is in the air, you will crash imminently.

  • @becm9537
    @becm9537 5 років тому +64

    Bless the cameraman following Michael around 😂😂

    • @Edrisal
      @Edrisal 4 роки тому +4

      Rebecca Muscat ant the light handlers man 😂

    • @ixlnxs
      @ixlnxs 3 роки тому +3

      @@Edrisal Neither of them will ever get fat as long as they work for him or Russel Kane.

  • @trizzkennedy8353
    @trizzkennedy8353 5 років тому +218

    You can often see Australians doing the common “side ways squat”

    • @alexthomas7470
      @alexthomas7470 5 років тому +7

      Russians do the same. I’m British but but my Slavic side has a bit more sense.

  • @ciara8560
    @ciara8560 5 років тому +207

    Irish get the kids to run under the ropes to save the spot haha

  • @melanieohara6941
    @melanieohara6941 5 років тому +97

    Michael is so refreshing! Like Jerry Seinfeld in the States, Michael is hilarious and “right on target” without resorting to foul language and verbal diarrhea. Greetings from Wyoming!🙋🏼‍♀️💞🏔🌠

    • @st8fromtheho0d18
      @st8fromtheho0d18 5 років тому

      As while he "beep beep beep's"... He's twiddling his middle fingers... Hilarious yes but not completely clean comedy....

    • @chriswilliams6568
      @chriswilliams6568 4 роки тому +6

      never found Seinfeld funny at all.

    • @katiedid1851
      @katiedid1851 3 роки тому +3

      Beats Seinfeld

    • @Jade_Deja
      @Jade_Deja 2 роки тому +1

      Sorry but please don't compare Michael to Seinfeld who is not funny at all

    • @JBG-AjaxzeMedia
      @JBG-AjaxzeMedia 2 роки тому +1

      @@Jade_Deja don't compare british comedians to american comedians at all lol

  • @winterwitch457
    @winterwitch457 2 роки тому +19

    I’ve never flown anywhere nor ever been to an airport yet I still laughed my head off at this video. Michael has an uncanny ability to create such a prominent picture in my imagination that his jokes almost become relatable even if you’ve never had a similar experience. Love Michael his jokes are hilarious and he’s definitely my favourite comedian.

  • @HighTen_Melanie
    @HighTen_Melanie 5 років тому +928

    _”But the plane won’t leave without us....”_

    • @AbsoluteMiniacGena
      @AbsoluteMiniacGena 5 років тому +2

      ☀️ Sunny Days ☀️ 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘩, 𝘱𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘺. 𝘏𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘸𝘢𝘵 𝘐𝘔𝘏𝘖

    • @AbsoluteMiniacGena
      @AbsoluteMiniacGena 5 років тому +1

      Ben Mackay Games Jealous? Of what exactly? Poor? As in cash-poor? Nup, I don’t have to work so I don’t think so! Nice try in your attempted attack on me for having an opinion. Aren’t they allowed any more? Do we all have to think the same? *Plonker!*

    • @AliceMcDonagh
      @AliceMcDonagh 5 років тому +15

      Mrs Frogzilla he’s funny as hell, you obviously don’t have any humor 🙄

    • @thegiantpumpkin5903
      @thegiantpumpkin5903 5 років тому +9

      I love Michael I think he’s a great comedian but come on guys this is just someone’s opinion let it go. Everyone is entitled to theirs.

    • @hhhfff7953
      @hhhfff7953 5 років тому +3

      Just repeating the joke.

  • @samkaraca1337
    @samkaraca1337 Рік тому +14

    I can really relate to the constant checking of the passport while in the airport… Then the two seconds of panic when I’ve checked the wrong pocket… Love you Mikey Mac! 😂

    • @fionamackie3357
      @fionamackie3357 Рік тому +2

      A constant panic when I used to travel with three kids. Forever checking the freaking passports. I did lose a kid at the airport once, but NEVER a passport😂

  • @Metusion
    @Metusion 5 років тому +19

    thank goodness you were here, last time I was stuck in a locker for half an hour. LOL

  • @bluenile1574
    @bluenile1574 5 років тому +66

    The only comedian who will make the usual to be very funny. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @Jules-dn9jl
    @Jules-dn9jl 6 місяців тому +5

    I'm so glad Micheal McIntyre exists. He isn't just a comedian. He lives humour.

  • @aaroncwilliam5562
    @aaroncwilliam5562 2 роки тому +7

    When he smacked the bread on the camera though 😂

  • @silverspoonaj6483
    @silverspoonaj6483 5 років тому +176

    I was on an escalator but this man on the stairs next to me looked at me and said I'll beat y'all and started running. He then tripped and I walked off before him

    • @lauraarcher1730
      @lauraarcher1730 5 років тому +1

      Gacha Comet 😂😂😂👍

    • @ixlnxs
      @ixlnxs 3 роки тому

      Of all the things that never happened, this one didn't happen so much it unhappened things that had.

    • @mrz80
      @mrz80 3 роки тому +1

      He was golden 'til he started mouthing off. Then he tripped over his need for attention. :P

    • @marionthompson3365
      @marionthompson3365 3 місяці тому

      😂😂😂

  • @homemail9653
    @homemail9653 5 років тому +64

    9:23...and off we go!!!! This guy is a gem

    • @ixlnxs
      @ixlnxs 3 роки тому +1

      It's my favourite bit in ALL I've ever seen of him.

  • @izzyreali9738
    @izzyreali9738 5 років тому +25

    Air travel is so ridiculously stressful, but he makes it seem so funny

    • @georgielancaster1356
      @georgielancaster1356 Рік тому

      It's just like the slowest, faff me about beyond belief, high security bus ride that has one drop off spot.
      And has the most in your face, officious, nastily artificially nice crew.

  • @michellebolen3892
    @michellebolen3892 5 років тому +131

    My husband and I are hoping to travel to the UK one day hopefully with in the next couple of years. And we have both agreed that the ONLY two things we MUST do is go see a football game of his favorite team, and our top thing COME SEE YOU IN A SHOW! These are our top two bucket list items! Number two see a football game and number one SEE MICHAEL MCINTYRE LIVE!
    Much love and respect and thank you so very much for the hours of laughs and enjoyment watching you on you tube and around the net.
    Michelle B.
    Maine USA

    • @user-zc6mi5hx2f
      @user-zc6mi5hx2f 5 років тому +2

      Michelle Bolen - are there any American comedians you know of that compare to Micheal McIntyre ?

    • @michellebolen3892
      @michellebolen3892 5 років тому +4

      @@user-zc6mi5hx2f Bill Engvall has a VERY similar comedic style. He is mu second favorite comedian after Michael. Very funny and very relatable just like Michael is. If you like Michael you probably will like Bill Engvall

    • @sophiekirkley4398
      @sophiekirkley4398 5 років тому +5

      completely irrelevant but which football team XD

    • @user-zc6mi5hx2f
      @user-zc6mi5hx2f 5 років тому +3

      Sophie Crazy - my guess is ‘Luton Town football club’

    • @user-zc6mi5hx2f
      @user-zc6mi5hx2f 5 років тому +3

      Michelle Bolen - billy is relatable with his comedy - but i relate to Micheal more..because I’m from where he lives in UK ..so accents are similar (easier to understnd) - with billy, He is a strong Texan accent..you have to really concentrate to understand every word of what he’s saying.

  • @lynngilman1402
    @lynngilman1402 3 роки тому +10

    Michael is brilliant and I want to thank him for bring laughter to my day, after suffering in the OR doing “inventory “ xo

  • @shananalexander9789
    @shananalexander9789 5 років тому +4

    I can’t quit watching. I’m looking all the time for your comedy. So funny.

  • @ashleyvalkoss2130
    @ashleyvalkoss2130 5 років тому +26

    My family has done that, his American impression, this was totally relatable! 🤣

  • @missgunst4152
    @missgunst4152 5 років тому +54

    The blinds have to be up, because of one simple reason: if there is an accident, the next new in the front see different things when they look outside. So a burning engine can’t be seen from the first row, but from the windows above the engine. And to make it easy, it’s limited to everyone to open these blinds for start and landing.
    Just for info
    T.

    • @leschase1824
      @leschase1824 5 років тому +8

      Also, so the fire service can see inside to see what is happening in case of an emergency should there be a cabin fire.

  • @thetruth1733
    @thetruth1733 5 років тому +46

    Who else is watching in bed on a lazy Sunday afternoon to have a laugh instead of being sad and moody

  • @catmom1322
    @catmom1322 2 роки тому +3

    It's April 2022 & I just discovered this gem! What a gift he has!

  • @MrErnestRigby
    @MrErnestRigby 4 роки тому +13

    Well Michael, it takes a lot to bring tears to my eyes but this one did it. Well done and very funny. You get better and better as you go on. Thank you for making me laugh.

  • @conservativeeducator3696
    @conservativeeducator3696 3 роки тому +9

    From personal experience... the plane WILL leave without you!🤣🤣

  • @prinsazz8683
    @prinsazz8683 3 роки тому +5

    Lol the reclining made me crack up. 🤣 I ended up with my leg in a brace for 4 months because of a rude recliner lol.

  • @CMTHFAF
    @CMTHFAF 4 роки тому +35

    Tall American here, and yep, I’m guilty of the “Yee Haw”

    • @mrz80
      @mrz80 3 роки тому +1

      I was late getting to an airport once back when I was young and healthy enough to pull stunts like this, and did the OJ Simpson thing, running pell-mell thru the concourse, hurdling obstacles, all while lugging a carryon AND an acoustic guitar to be hand-checked at the gate. Made it to the gate with maybe a minute to spare before departure time only to find out bad weather in Atlanta had delayed the flight I was going to be getting on for an hour or more. OY.

  • @ilovesuisse1
    @ilovesuisse1 4 роки тому +6

    This is the second time i’ve watched this and i still laughed like mad. Michael McIntyre is just great.

  • @lolabrini3758
    @lolabrini3758 3 роки тому +3

    he might be the most adorably funny comedian. Def top 3. And always CLEAN JOKES.

  • @DarkCreed
    @DarkCreed 5 років тому +14

    2:11 That is me with everything. Wallet, car keys, loose change.

  • @hildasnails5961
    @hildasnails5961 5 років тому +96

    Icelanders do the same as British people with the ropes😂

    • @eb7446
      @eb7446 5 років тому +10

      I'm Canadian and same. I don't know, maybe if I was tall enough to just walk over the ropes I'd have considered it...but, no.

    • @notjustanotherguy739
      @notjustanotherguy739 5 років тому +10

      Hahaha, I think it's a north-west european thing, I just wrote a comment about Sweden, lmao XDDD
      It's such a relief going to for example Spain and just relaxing in the chaos of spontaneous people.

    • @hildasnails5961
      @hildasnails5961 5 років тому

      @@notjustanotherguy739 är du svensk?

    • @prettyinpinky5937
      @prettyinpinky5937 5 років тому

      South African’s too

    • @BRQFilms
      @BRQFilms 5 років тому

      i'm not from europe or africa and i do the same. i can recollect going through an empty ropes in zig zags lol, but my nationality doesn't have a certain way of going with it i think

  • @Amy-uf3oj
    @Amy-uf3oj 5 років тому +26

    I’ve kind of been the elderly in the back of the buggy...I was the passenger in a wheelchair after being escorted off the plane by paramedics 😂 Also, does anyone think of Shrek when going through the ropes?

  • @nicolasimcox1748
    @nicolasimcox1748 Рік тому +1

    I have been suffering with depression and watching one of Michaels videos daily makes me laugh and just for a while I forget the awful feeling I’m struggling with - I really want to get tickets to come and see you live just once

  • @michaelcook2360
    @michaelcook2360 Рік тому +2

    Flew for first time last week. So thought I’d go through UA-cam and search for airport bits now that I can relate 😂😂

  • @patrickjinks
    @patrickjinks 5 років тому +120

    Best joke was 32B isn't even a window seat

  • @n.m.8728
    @n.m.8728 5 років тому +20

    Reclining the seat all at once is like backing your car out of the parking space without even looking back.

    • @mrz80
      @mrz80 3 роки тому

      When the person in front of me starts to do that, I reposition my legs so that they'll hit my knees about halfway thru the seatback's travel. They think they've hit the limit and stop. I set my legs back down and I've still get some legroom. Just one of many coping strategies they never mentioned I'd need when I was in high school. :D

  • @iynur
    @iynur 5 років тому +10

    Geeeez he’s such a genius. I’m a Chinese, despite different cultures, I can relate almost everything in his jokes, it’s smth global, it’s human nature haha. He’s so observant!!!I can literally see me in all his jokes haha. Telling from the way I handle the rope system, I’m half British half American and from time to time give a Canadian type of sorry when Americans yeehah in my way😂😂😂

  • @Nick_C1997
    @Nick_C1997 5 років тому +57

    I'm British and this is how I handle the rope system, I alternate between hurdling one rope and ducking under another

    • @earlgrey6736
      @earlgrey6736 5 років тому +4

      you maverick!

    • @mrz80
      @mrz80 3 роки тому

      Over one and under the next? Are you perhaps a weaver? :D

    • @Nick_C1997
      @Nick_C1997 3 роки тому

      @@mrz80 No, I just like patterns

  • @ruzahel6287
    @ruzahel6287 4 роки тому +5

    He’s like those childhood storytellers only with funnier stories. I love it. It’s wholesome.

  • @PaulaJoW
    @PaulaJoW 5 років тому +8

    Laughing until I'm crying. Hilarious!!

  • @tottenhamtillidie5102
    @tottenhamtillidie5102 5 років тому +2

    Ive watched this about 10 times and it keeps getting better

  • @koalabear2752
    @koalabear2752 5 років тому +28

    The blinds have to be up so that if something goes wrong in take-off or landing and the plane falls back down, then when you get outside you are still used to daylight and can escape quickly...
    Rescuers also need to look inside to see who is dead and who's alive so they can save them...

    • @tilez273
      @tilez273 5 років тому +1

      It also makes it easier for pilots to look quickly or flight attendants if something fucks up on the wing or engine because in an emergency during decent or ascent needs to be diagnosed quick because it is the most deadly time

    • @mrz80
      @mrz80 3 роки тому

      That's the first time I've heard a semi-reasonable explanation put forth for the window shade rule.

  • @willbridge3433
    @willbridge3433 4 роки тому +8

    That feeling when you're in 3rd or 4th place in the race of the travelator and you get to the baggage collection and everyone in front of you has to wait for their bag to crawl round the conveyor but you walk straight past with a smug smile, a sense of victory and a medium-sized carry-on backpack.

  • @joannedelacruz5603
    @joannedelacruz5603 5 років тому +2

    I watched this clip several times and I’m still laughing out loud every time ..🤣🤣🤣

  • @JoeBleasdaleReal
    @JoeBleasdaleReal Місяць тому +1

    The best rope system is at Copenhagen Airport: it goes through THREE DIFFERENT ROOMS! And it all loops round in a way that makes you feel like you’ve solved one of those puzzle book mazes as a kid 😂

  • @carole2799
    @carole2799 3 роки тому

    I needed that laughter!! Brilliant!!!

  • @lewisrennison8736
    @lewisrennison8736 5 років тому +17

    Saw him live in Auckland at Spark Arena and he’s so funny.

  • @kiwi_kini
    @kiwi_kini 4 роки тому +3

    There’s a completion Of Michaels best joke everything. This man can joke about any subject

  • @SceneArtisan
    @SceneArtisan 5 років тому +39

    "If God wanted us to fly, he'd have bought the ticket".

    • @mrz80
      @mrz80 3 роки тому

      (*looks at the cross*) 's kinda what He did ;)

  • @redrain4477
    @redrain4477 5 років тому +5

    My wife and saw him at the O2 , great night out lots of laughter MM is good for your soul .

  • @lifewuzonceezr
    @lifewuzonceezr 5 років тому +11

    When You Look Like Your Passport Photo, It's Time To Go Home..- Erma Bombeck

  • @euaneill5920
    @euaneill5920 5 років тому +3

    Michael McIntyre is a god amongst men!

  • @shendrew
    @shendrew 4 роки тому +2

    LEGEND. Absolute legend!

  • @joseftsubas2240
    @joseftsubas2240 2 роки тому

    Feels great hearing those advises a day before my flight, let the race begins!!

  • @meganeloise8189
    @meganeloise8189 5 років тому +11

    Non moving floor + heelies + hold on to the moving handrail = winner

  • @umairusman
    @umairusman 5 років тому +26

    Americans go YYYEEEHHHAW! ..what was that lol

  • @tiveyhouse
    @tiveyhouse 3 роки тому +3

    The passport one is really funny. I am always delegated to keep all the passports, I hold the responsibility LOL. And yes I check every 2 minutes.

  • @Jerry.anthony.c
    @Jerry.anthony.c 2 роки тому +1

    0:53 - 😂😂😂😂 This is soooo meeee!!! Lmaooo

  • @johnnybelinda8539
    @johnnybelinda8539 5 років тому +18

    hahaha can't wait for one about baggage claim

  • @konstantinostryfonos4266
    @konstantinostryfonos4266 5 років тому +5

    Hilarious as always but just for the people wondering about the blind situation, in case of an emergency the flight attendants need to be able to see outside in order to be able to evacuate the plane safely since most accidents happen during take off and landing. (i assune vice versa for emergency services sight in the inside)

  • @helengorton894
    @helengorton894 11 місяців тому

    So agree!!! Bravo light-man!!! Spectacular job!!!

  • @vanillapiper9063
    @vanillapiper9063 5 років тому +7

    The American impersonation is completely accurate, I can’t think of any one here who doesn’t end their sentence with “yeehaw”

  • @aurora_2754
    @aurora_2754 5 років тому +4

    You make me laugh every time Michael ❤️😘😂

  • @James-vx9ri
    @James-vx9ri 4 роки тому +5

    Never fails to make me laugh 😂

  • @userhFDR7PBw
    @userhFDR7PBw Рік тому

    You make me so happy!

  • @Mese0609
    @Mese0609 5 років тому +7

    The blinds actually have to go up so that the passengers can let the flight attendants know if there is a wing/engine fire 🔥

  • @julietteashmore4831
    @julietteashmore4831 2 роки тому

    The blinds on the plane 🤣🤣🤣👌

  • @sarahstrong7174
    @sarahstrong7174 4 роки тому

    Thankyou. This has made me laugh & cheered me up which was much needed.

  • @spanz21
    @spanz21 5 років тому +4

    Finally going to see him. He’s coming to NEW YORK. 🙌🏻

  • @annebiebrich9155
    @annebiebrich9155 2 роки тому +1

    You are so funny! I laugh till I cry!

  • @jamesbeeks2377
    @jamesbeeks2377 5 років тому +9

    I love this guy 😂

  • @reecen819
    @reecen819 4 роки тому +1

    🤣 the moving floor🤣 I don’t care if it’s going at 100 mph, I can and I will beat it by walking

  • @londontravellers22
    @londontravellers22 2 роки тому +1

    I sent this to my cabin crew best friend. She said this is so spot on.

  • @Jerry.anthony.c
    @Jerry.anthony.c 2 роки тому +2

    5:44 - "Really" 😂😂😂😂😂

    • @eloisebrynlee
      @eloisebrynlee Рік тому

      That was a favourite moment of mine! 😆

  • @guelisworld
    @guelisworld Рік тому

    07:24 "Because right next to the moving floor is a non-moving floor option...which I think we can just call floor." 😂❤️

  • @50ishsue
    @50ishsue 3 роки тому +3

    He's completely correct in everything he says ! 🤭💖

  • @JaneDoe-ci3gj
    @JaneDoe-ci3gj 5 років тому +6

    Non moving floor option😂😂😂👍👍👍

  • @cheryllemme9332
    @cheryllemme9332 5 років тому +9

    I am American. We bypass rope, walk right to counter!

  • @starcharx9139
    @starcharx9139 5 років тому +4

    when he started to talk about the blinds i lost it 😂

  • @arts2crafts
    @arts2crafts 5 років тому +4

    You are hilarious dude ! Awesome

  • @jasminesando8227
    @jasminesando8227 2 роки тому +3

    and us Australians we try sprinting through the ropes to see who can get around the corners quickest.

  • @micheleb1158
    @micheleb1158 3 роки тому +5

    He is incredibly right about everything he says 😂

  • @carolynrose753
    @carolynrose753 5 років тому +15

    I beat the moving floor lol I start out with fast long steps before I get to them so am in full flight. Nothing like it after being in a flying cattle crate
    I shove my ticket and passport down my cleavage so I only have to glance down to check. Fly with cabin baggage only... if I can't fit it in I don't need it

    • @petertaylor4980
      @petertaylor4980 5 років тому +8

      He's wrong about the moving floor. There's nearly always one person who reaches the moving floor and stops walking, so they hold everyone else up while we leg stretchers power past.

  • @andrewyuzgin2254
    @andrewyuzgin2254 5 років тому +6

    Micheal McIntyre is basically the Middle Class hero

  • @lucycallaghan8435
    @lucycallaghan8435 3 роки тому

    The passport bit, that’s me!!

  • @Banana1874.
    @Banana1874. 4 роки тому

    You crack me up............... your the beeeeeeeeessssssssstttttttttt

  • @bl_leafkid4322
    @bl_leafkid4322 2 роки тому

    🤣🤣🤣You are the Best Michael