Q&A with Irene Lyon. All things anger: what it is, why it gets stuck, and what to do about it.
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- Опубліковано 2 сер 2024
- Welcome to a special Q&A session - all about anger!
I did this recording originally on my Facebook Page which you can find here: / lyonirene
Irene.
Here are some Questions/Topics I discuss in this chat:
(5:19) What is anger & how do I move it out of my system?
(11:17) Where does anger come from, what is it?
(17:00) How to process and express healthy anger & aggression
(28:29) I know I have anger, but I can’t get it out
(29:47) If we are afraid to express anger what does that mean? What can we do?
(32:48) Where does toxic anger come from & how does it occur?
(38:37) Is an anger response to unmet needs or feeling of incompetence due to trauma or immaturity?
(44:00) As we are aware of the anger rising up in us and as we practice orienting to the environment and our internal state, is there a place for creating a new narrative for using a mantra to re-direct this energy?
(46:09) How do I feel my anger when in public, and it wouldn’t be appropriate to express?
(52:12) How do we stop escalation?
(53:39) Can you release anger alone?
(56:30) I get chronic migraines, how can I tell it's from anger versus from the damage to my cervical spine?
(59:14) Will exercising help release trauma?
(1:05:03) Does sighing heavily help to release anger?
Resources I Mention In The Vlog:
► Healing Trauma 3-Part Video Training
irenelyon.com/healing-trauma-...
► HNSR FB group
groups/nervo...
► What is Healthy Aggression?
• What is healthy aggres...
► Kathy Kain
www.somaticpractice.net/
► Dr. Peter Levine
somaticexperiencing.com/
► Gabor Mate - book - When The Body Says No
drgabormate.com/book/when-the...
► What is a cathartic practice? Are they useful for healing trauma?
• What is a cathartic pr...
► The importance of titrating trauma release
• The importance of titr...
► The real deal on fear. And, why we’ve become masters at avoiding it.
irenelyon.com/2015/11/27/the-...
► SmartBody SmartMind
www.smartbodysmartmind.com/
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Thank you for being here!
1. Leave a comment and let me know how this video impacted you. Feel free to leave a question (my team answers them each week!)
2. To get more nervous system health resources, plus learn more about me and my credentials, plus the many ways you can work with me at the practical level, head to my website: irenelyon.com
3. Follow me on social here:
Instagram: / irenelyon
Facebook: / lyonirene
LinkedIn: / irenelyon
SoundCloud: / irenelyon
4. GOT QUESTIONS? Send an email to: support@irenelyon.com
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Please know that…
The statements on this UA-cam channel or in videos are simply opinion. Content presented or posted on this channel is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment or a professional therapeutic relationship. Content presented or posted is intended to provide general health information for educational purposes only and you should contact the appropriate healthcare professional before relying on any such information.
My website is a wealth of free resources and information on how to start this work, so here it is one more time: irenelyon.com
Thank for this anger presentation as Incest survivor I kept my anger for 71 years resulting in depression, anxiety and emotional anger episodes with loved ones. I am now in therapy 2 x a week and have a pyscharist also. At last, I want to thrive!😊
Very interesting! I did not feel safe with my mother. She was very self absorbed and inattentive unless she wanted me to do something. She really did expect me to raise myself. She never asked me about how I felt what I thought what I liked. I was not worth knowing. ALL of my family acts the same way. I became a people pleaser in order to survive. Your information is helping me validate my healing experience! THANK YOU!
It was the same experience for me. Well done to us for now recognising it and learning to come into our own power. Blessings to you
"...a fear of the genuine experience of anger..." wow, had to play that over a few times, never heard it before. This feels true for me and I have the exact clenching you describle in shoulders and throat - anger is a biggy for me.
So great to hear that that felt true to you!
Here's a few videos on anger if you want to dive in a bit more :)
Anger is Essential - ua-cam.com/video/CUDlnH4sZIY/v-deo.html
Healthy Aggression - ua-cam.com/video/tqGsbFjihHo/v-deo.html
Hope they provide you with some insight and tools!
Nicole - Team Lyon
You have made me decide the route I want to go with my Psych degree
I'm realizing that this is a big part of the mass shootings epidemic we have in the US. So much suppressed anger; not knowing how to work with anger.
Please keep the anger processing video that you did with your husband up. I am also doing this work and it is beneficial for people to witness this in order to show that it can be done without hurting themselves or others. Maybe just put in a watch this video first request to it. We NEED these examples and someone teaching the work. Please keep doing what you are doing and thank you so much for sharing the work that you are doing and you and your husband being examples that we CAN heal without drugs in a way that we were originally created.
Thanks for your very valuable thoughts on this!
It's appreciated.
Nicole - Team Lyon
I am
This is soooo important to me, thank you!!!
Dear Irene thank you for your brilliant work!💐🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🙏
I’ve never done this before in my whole life but I think I’m experiencing adrenal burnout and severe anxiety from lack of sleep with my second baby bc she has severe allergies to foods I eat and I have to breastfeed her bc she’s allergic to all formulas.
I have started to stomp my feet when I’m overwhelmed by noises or my baby scream crying from being itchy. I guess It’s my inner child self saying “it’s all too much for me”. It’s oddly grounding but I don’t want to keep doing it bc it feels like I’m being childish. I try to go out to the garage or another room to do it. I accidentally did it when arguing with my partner about being burnt out and I was so embarrassed 🙈
I’m glad to learn why this is happening
Sorry to hear that. I had the same problem with my first baby. I concluded a big part of the problem was childhood vaccines. They overstimulate the immune system and contain heavy metals. We ended up giving my daughter rice milk which has calcium added to it. From memory think she started drinking that from about 8 mths as she couldn’t tolerate formula either. She did ok with it, and her teeth are good (surprisingly) she is now 17. When she was a toddler I added a children’s liquid supplement called Incremin to it. It has iron in it. It was a pink raspberry flavoured syrup.
Irene, I am just stopping the video now to say that I really appreciate you sharing that video with the anger process. did it twise already, one alone with a squeeze ball and one with my boyfriend. for me it both times felt connected and not random and I even had my headache gone away after one of them. when alone I put a timer on 1 min. then I felt my feelings in my body and named them out loud for myself for one minute, and next minute I squeezed and did what felt right to express. I have a feeling it might work for other feelings like uneasyness which I feel quite a lot, will try to explore that. do you have some thoughts on this process for other feelings than anger?
also big thank you for all your love for us listeners. you share soo much important information. 💗💗💗
What do you think very popular so called spiritual practices like Law of attraction do to people when they begin to think that only being joyful and happy and positive are " high vibration" and feeling angry or negative are " low vibration" , I think it's highly destructive and bypassing to our very humanity- no different than homes with severe emotional abuse making putting on a happy face " good' and feeling sad, angry or upset negative.
Hi,
I totally agree with you.
You might enjoy this Meditation and Mindfulness 101 video :) ua-cam.com/video/nBH3u2OPERM/v-deo.html
Nicole - Team Lyon
Thank you! 💜 i’m just finishing up the 21 day nervous system tune up and getting ready to start SBSM. Al of the material you share on UA-cam and fb is so helpful to keep the reminders, tools and awareness in focus.
So excited to have you joining us for SBSM!!
Nicole - Team Lyon
This is pure gold. Thank you Irene!!!
In answer to your question about leaving the arm-squeeze-growl video up.... Can you edit it to strongly suggest we watch this video first? Or maybe edit the arm-squeeze-growl video to include the warnings/introduction before you show the technique?
The part about the little diaphragms was very helpful
I fully agree with the comment just below. And, the way you work through things, work them out as you speak...you express more than a statement could and you convey more variables that apply to varied individual situations. And, more comes to your mind than if you followed a script of statements from within, and they are often jewels. And, I've heard about everything concerning headaches save what you just conveyed about the particular situation of a recurrence following a release exercise.
I get more out of seeing a person wend their way because it brings it home, brings it to reality, and makes it relatable and accessible.
Keep going and thanks to all of Team Lyon!
Great analogy of climbing when fully ready.
Thank you Irene
Wow... amazing lecture thx 😄
31:40 “...Working with the actual physiology, not the emotions.” I’m just now realizing there is a difference. Thank you for this. So what actually are ‘emotions’ when we are talking about our physiology? I’m still a bit unclear on that: Is it the nervous system ‘talking’?
Hey Stephanie, Seth here with Team Lyon. We view emotions as essentially constellations of sensations that we have applied meaning to. A lot of people think that emotions are the thoughts they are having in their head about the sensations, which keeps a person stuck and going in loops. When we can get underneath all the meaning and interpretation we can tap into the wisdom of the raw emotions themselves, which are simply bodily sensations that come and go. In this way we tap into the innate healing power of the mammalian self - a wolf doesn't need analysis, and it doesn't contemplate it's sensations, it's emotions, it just lives them and responds. Granted, we are more complex than that, but when it comes to healing trauma, we need to tap into the wisdom of this innate, mammalian experience.
I notice anger and frustration gets stored in my lower back, hips and legs as when I do yin yoga it starts to release and I feel so angry. I don’t know how to feel this and not somatisise because I live with my family as I recover. I want to scream and shout and I don’t feel I can. When I let it build I can then have huge outbursts where I snap at them. It is a lot of old anger but ironically mostly at them. Any tips?
I'd like some tips too
Ok. Thanks for another resolution of tightnes in the body. I had stiffed body ever scince my young years. And I wasnt excersizing then. I was questioning myself about it and posture conected to toxic shaming. Amd when I tried to do yoga I had panic atacks, because deep breathing in yoga is pushing my energy also deeper in my body. And anxiety that I have is also conected to anger, because it is huge, and it doesnt want to hurt loved ones who harmed me. I also had a lot of dreams always taking blame on myself, and not protecting myself.
Thanks Irene ! I grab my pillow and bite into it but i don´t have headache afterwards
but I notice that I yawn often.
Question: what if when anger comes up and you have fear or shame that come up too, but they’re not because you’re afraid to feel it but because it was taught to you that you’re bad or whatever if you express it? That’s different than what you described as not being ready to feel it, right?
Hi Stef, Seth here with Team Lyon. Yes, that's a bit different, as you are feeling the anger and when the system really isn't ready, it won't allow you to feel it in the first place. If shame and fear always highjack the experience though, then that does mean that the system still needs to learn how to stay with the anger and not collapse. One way through this is by working with the emotions of disgust, as Irene talks about in this video.... ua-cam.com/video/2KlV1zD5asw/v-deo.html
@@IreneLyon thank you Seth, I’ll watch this other video then
Back in the 70’s or 80’s I have this memory from when I was a kid of my mom whacking the bed with a tennis racket and yelling out her anger and I’m pretty sure it freaked me out and I’m pretty sure it didn’t help her much either 😅
Leave the anger video up
Im fucking angry at the moment listening to this, and trying to find out what to do with it
You mention 6 emotions: Joy, surprise, fear, sadness disgust and anger. What about the emotion of Love or generosity? There is the opposite of sadness i.e. joy, mentioned but what about the opposite of fear and disgust?
How do I delete my past so I can move on with my life i have been in don't good relationship in my past
You don't delete your past, you learn to work with it so that you can allow it to be integrated and heal
Hello i have a lot of anger from my past and I am from Melbourne
Does anger cause cancer? I used to hear that long time ago.
Hi Anna,
Nicole here from Team Lyon.
I wouldn't say that anger causes cancer. But someone may get cancer who has unresolved trauma because there system is too focused on surviving (check out the Healing Trauma for more information on that! - irenelyon.com/healing-trauma ) and isn't able to fight off those cancer spreading cells as easily.
Stored/trapped/stuck anger in our body CAN be part of this.
@@teamlyon3109i have breast cancer and i do believe a bog part of it is repressed anger and i so appreciate your videos as i am still dealing with it. It is at myself and also my spouse. I have unresolved childhood abuse and my spouse during his addiction also abused me and now i am his caretaker. Which i know i could leave but i have allot of shame and guilt and we have children who do not hold all that against him as he has now been clean and sober for 30 plus years. But i have much in unresolved resentment at myself for not leaving and now being in this position. It is really difficult to heal whilst still living it daily. All my immediate family ( mother father brother sister) have passed away and thus this is my family now. I have allot of very disturbing dreams and i know i am not a violent person but feel my anger is trying to find a release. I have seen several people reference another video saying you show how to do that? I would be ever so grateful.
Jesus Said.. “From your Heart..Forgive EveryOne.” That is Healthy Way to Live. Love and Peace is the highest vibration we can live. That is the goal to strive for. Peace is the best for me. I have repercussions from being excited..it affects me adversely too.
Hi kathleen Wharton, as you've watched some of Irene's other videos, you may know that excitement is a form of sympathetic nervous system (SNS) activation. When we have trauma, sometimes the system responds to ANY SNS activation as a threat - whether it's excitement or fear, elation or anger. As you build nervous system regulation, this can start to shift. - Jen from Team Lyon