Key & Peele - I Said Bitch
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- Опубліковано 31 січ 2012
- Two men trade stories about arguing with their wives and setting them straight.
About Key & Peele:
Key & Peele showcases the fearless wit of stars Keegan-Michael Key and Jordan Peele as the duo takes on everything from "Gremlins 2" to systemic racism. With an array of sketches as wide-reaching as they are cringingly accurate, the pair has created a bevy of classic characters, including Wendell, the players of the East/West Bowl and President Obama's Anger Translator.
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#KeyandPeele - Комедії
Subscribe to the new Key & Peele UA-cam channel for all the classics as well as new-to-UA-cam sketches: ua-cam.com/channels/dN4aXTrHAtfgbVG9HjBmxQ.html
oh damn yeah Ill subscribe biiiiiihhhhhh
xD
Xxx male sex male animals
You guys accidentally made this available in Canada. Now I can watch this video but if I click any of the annotated videos at the end, they all fail with a region error.
Fitches (f'n b!+ch35) got a LOckdown on the MGTOW crap lol .Universally
You said that? But you said bitch, though?
Kytano, I looked at her dead in the eye and I said "Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch...."
you said bitch though.
+Shawn Garcia I looked right into her eye sockets lol
Hmm?
I looked at the window and said "BITCH!"....i then joined my freinds..that being the dirt and grass outside the window XD
This sketch is how me and my coworkers act when we talk about our bosses. lol.
You said "bitch", really?
Exactly 😂😩😭
exactly coworkers little talk
ua-cam.com/video/3r1Iz0BgN8w/v-deo.html
Your fired
I told my wife the premise of this skit and she did not see the humor in it. I said, I said (looks around) biiiii...
You actually said that?
@@suf1an658 Hmm? 😒😅
@@juncho1977 you said that tho?! 😬😅
@@tylerjohnson5406...uuummm yeah 🤫😣
Oh no you DIDn't!!!
This is one of the most perfectly executed comedy sketches I've ever seen.
Ever.
This and Substitute Teacher. Love these guys.
It's funny but let's not get crazy. Plenty of comedy skits Way funnier than this.
You haven’t seen many then.
@@slb6932 not to us.
“Darrel, I named SEVEN more restaurants-“
*”NO CRAIG, NO!”*
Master Debater LMAO
That’s that bullshit just say where you want to eat lol
More compelling drama than anything on a major network in the past 10 years
Bro when he said, "NO CRAIG" I busted out laughin'!
Master Debater I finally said Taylor's the place I know she wanted to go in the first place. then why didn't he say that to begin with?😂
when he hugged the tree and closed his eyes, i felt that level of adrenaline and fear
Bruh😂😂😂😂😂😥😥😥
Right like closing his eyes makes it to where they can’t see em lol
three words after i read this comment. Dear. Evan. Hansen.
We were all in trouble at that point
He went into koala mode lol.
This whole sketch is the most believable dialogue between two married men.
“shes stepping out the damn shower talking bout can i help you?” 😂😂
And I said
@@ndo533 biiiiiiitttttccchh
😁
True story ; )
I know that bit made me laugh😆😂🤣
The gradually weirder ways of saying "eyes" are incredible
Beep literally
Linking to subreddits outside of reddit
bruh
Optic Stems
yeah that is one of the little things that make their skits unique and more funny
@@BeepUA-cam lol how about now? 😼
They lookin around harder than a white guy telling a black joke.
The Elike LMFAO
The Elike oh my gosh that's like the comic(?) where they are doing just that and a black guy pops out of the houseplant and calls them on it.
Be a man and stop using bam margera pics for your ugly ass face.
@@Mr.Deleterious ok big boi
LMFAO
Just looked this up for another laugh. It's flawless, tight and perfect comedy.
Two whipped dudes who also call their wives that isn't funny, it's sad.
@@pnut3844able womp womp
@@pnut3844ablethe whole premise of the skit is that the woman runs the relationship but according to the husbands speaking to each other they claim to be the man of the house which isn’t the case how has the whole joke flown over your head
12 years later, still kills every time I watch it.
It’s hilarious. Me and my coworker used to always do this line at work. Nobody else got it, sad.
The way he hugs the tree and closes his eyes. Just like a child... Lols
sinkiy he is camouflaging
Made me lose it ngl
Yeah cos that makes a difference.... 🤣
Arian Ziaei Yea I used to do that as a kid lol
He was like I'm sleeping
"Daryl, I named 7 more restaurants."
"No, Craig, no!"
Every married man can testify to this
+Hockey Patriot Every married smart man knows not to say anything but what his woman wants to hear.
+i Will +Hockey Patriot yall sounding like some simps. you the man, you take charge, you dictate where yall go. might be to late for yall tho judging off what I just read.
i Will Lol ok bro. Whatever you gotta tell ya self to salvage wateva manhood you have left. imma just leave you to your delusions and weak humdrum defense mechanisms you resort to.
Bruhman, 5th Floor
If possessing the ability to articulate properly is delusional, i'll take that with pride.
“Darrr...rell, I looked this women into the windows of her soul”
When they are way out in the field and they still look around to see if someone is in earshot and a lonely hawk/vulture/eagle/crow cries out...perfect
Hilarious.... I said...
But you said bitch tho
+Lisa Westmoreland Omg I love your profile picture. It's my screensaver Lmao
ain't nothin' but a thang
K& K hmm?
This should be required viewing before a man gets married.
@Hardcore Guro "Ok boomer" Because you are still a virgin at 35 doesn't mean normal people have to be 60 to be married.
No man should be marrying, period.
Those days are over.
Feminism rigged divorce courts.
Juice no longer worth the squeeze.
@Zacary Grasl how did it go with the friend and his fiance? Did he (or she) call it off and/or annul the marriage?
@Zacary Grasl On the contrary, its HE who got into trouble for following through with the marriage. Lol.
There is no benefit for a man to legally marry now that feminism has completely penetrated family and divorce courts.
If theyee ever to divorce, she could divorce-rape him with the gentle prodding of her lawyer that HE would be paying for. Smh.
Hope it works out for him.
You yourself are A-O-K. No comparison to what he's gotten himself into. Lol.
@Hardcore Guro porn how is telling a joke in the comments a boomer attitude?
I always love how high budget K and P sketches are even for a simple premise.
Well it's network cable, so.....
This skit puts me in tears no matter how many times I've seen it.
The way Jordan hugged that tree 😂😂😂
K
+Cory Smith with the eyes closed :P Brilliant (-_-)
+Cory Smith Everyone deserves someone who will hug them like Jordan hugged that tree!
"I looked this woman dead in the windows of her soul" 🤣
Lol
I said :biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch
DA-RYL
Sdsam
😂
"I named 7 other restaurants and then named the one she really wanted to go to." I felt that.
If that's where you wanna go....
1 of the best comedy sketches ever, seem it so many times, but when i watch it again, still cracks me up so much
Eyes , eye sockets, optic stems , the windows of her soul
Diarmid Thomson 😂
Her *Sight Catcher hole*
Instruments of vision
Instrument of vision man!
😂😂😂
I died when he hugged the tree man
In the audio commentary on the dvd, Key said that's his wife's favorite part, too!
That was my favorite part.
Man I died too fam
Who's the tree man?
Jordan Peele, director and writer of Get Out!
“No Craig No” that line delivered perfectly😭
Don’t worry you’re not the only one back for this masterpiece
“I looked this woman in her optic stems ” lmaooo I lost it
Optic stem
Omg me 2... I love how they said same thing just used different words get it across
Mileides Guevara me toooooo😂😂😂😂😂😂
I straight up said chillys
For real haha
so this is why people become astronauts lol
"A black hole is so massive that no light or sound escapes it."
NASA niggas be like:
That or to escape Ohio.
@@Kusriyason Ohio doesn't exist
Black holes sucked up all niggas still saying "bitch".
I need another reason to become an astronaut.🤔🌑
Best part:Peele closing his eyes while hugging the tree 🤣
i love their usage of various synonyms for "eyes" 😂😂
"I said I said I said BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH"
you said bitch tho?
@@ubangy804 he really did tho like "BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH"😂
@@ubangy804 hmm?
Congrats, I am like number 666
@@petehaight1139 you devil lol
“I look this woman in her OPTIC STEMS” HAHAGHAHAHHAAH
ARMY💜
@@BlueHat1 Kpop Gabage. Bunch of cross eyed plastic surgery soy boys that make generic music that little girls like you obsess over lmao.
@@joshuac3957 this comment is edited and there's still grammatical errors
@@epiclegodude123 I really dont care. I still got my message across. :)
Why do you laugh like Mr. Krabs 😂
When two guys can make a grown man cry with laughter, it exemplifies geniuses at their very best!
2:04 I love you. The way he said it cracks me up every time
When the ladies poke there head in..."hey guys!" there about to drop a log! 🤣
@2:34
I like how he closes his eyes like if he can't see her, she can't see him
Paul Lee bro I’m dying at this comment 😂😭
Well spotted AHAHA
he praying
Haha. I be doing the same thou when I'm tryna remain hidden
Too funny!🤣🤣🤣
Girlfriend told me I couldn't watch Key & Peele. I said biiiiiitch!
Did you say bitch tho?
y-yup
Martin Nørregaard lol
Martin, are you still alive?
*girlfriend appears*
Pretending to be asleep on the tree gets me every time 😂
The fact that they still look around while in space ^_^
and that how the aliens learnt the first earthen word........
Biiiiiiiiiitch
Ain' nothin' but a thang . . .
+Kaiel Gerosa .
But you said Bitch, Tho?
Doubt aliens are as tough as we are tho, they won't have the guts to say.... *looking around*
....... biiiitch to our wives.
My lady got mad at me for laughing at this. I looked her straight in her eyebrow holders and said..... ... ... .. Beeeitch!
Lmao
Y-you said that?
But...but you did say "Beeeitch" though? You did say it?
@@thankyouJESUSkingofkings Ain't nothing but a thang!
he didn´t tho... tellem james
“I look this woman in her optic stems”😂😂😂
By far the best comedic duo.
"I named 7. MORE. RESTAURANTS."
"No, Craig. No!"
I forgot this was a sketch when he said that.
No Craig no! 😂😂 lame and hilarious
Darryl..
This is what simps go through. Weak men cave & struggle with this. Don't pay too much attention to what women say, most of the time they're testing you.
Found the incel. He’s just above me!
"No Craig! No!!" Lmfao
by far the best conversation
"Ain' nothin' but a thang!"
Bryan Frank " say what you mean, mean what you say"
Bryan Frank n
0:30 Nuh uhh
2024 still funny 😂😂😂
I’ll never forget the night when I put some news on Hulu for my dad and when it was over thjs episode came on up next and I walk into the living room my dad in tears and this sketch was playing hahahha I miss you pops wish we could still watch tv together
That's a good story man.
🖤
Bye i am crying
I am sad now
To anyone replying to this post; don’t be sad . He lived a long life and passed away in his sleep with his family and kids by his side at the age of 93. A Vietnam vet and a man with a hell of punch to show for it. He was a good man and he was never alone. Your comments alone give me love. Ty friends. And I thank K&P for the last sound of laughter I heard from my father. Bless you all.
"Darryl, I named SEVEN more restaurants
No, Craig, no."
I'm actually dying
amit banai It's so true though. My girlfriend does the exact same thing.
Same
Lmao
No you're dying ya crazy bitch
Lol the names they chose, perfect. Great writers.
Ways they said ‘eyes’
- ‘Eye’
- ‘Eyesockets’
- ‘Optic stems’
- ‘The windows of her soul’
Hands down one of the funniest skits they’ve ever done
“In her optic stems” XD
Yes! That was my fav part.
In the windows of her soul 😂
anitachakita in her eye sockets
Blockbuster
When you scroll down to comment your favorite line as the part happens.. and the first comment I see is the line😂😂
Lmao Peele’s face when hugging the tree, pure terror
😜😅😂
He looks like a terrified child holding on to their parent..lol
When he hugs the tree and closes his eyes…my favorite part! Just a genius sketch.
My favorite part
Y'all some handpecked soy boys smh. Not to mention a real man would ever even think about calling his wife that smh. Grow up
I don't know how many times I've seen this but this never fails to make me laugh everytime
Hugging the tree and closing his eyes is so incredibly spot on
I could see him but my girl saw him disappear. He became a chameleon.
They became astronauts just to be able to get away and say biiiiiiiitch.
IKR 😆😆😆
and still looked around
thats the joke!
slicvm n
slicvm You mean bIiIiIiIiIiIiTcH
this was the first K&P skit i watched...whew time flies
He looked her in her optic stems 😆🤣
*looks around*
Ciara Majesty I said biiiiiiiiiitch
Lincoln Bohrer xD
Ciara Majesty hmm?
Darryl Cornejo You said bitch?
lazer T Yep.
fallen in love with both men in about twenty mins.
I fell in love with you in 20 seconds
Ah i love you too baby have a blessed day & keep smiling
(guy in the distance) HES TRYING TO GET N YOUR PANTS!!!!!!
Don Draper heheheh
Don Draper that is some funny shit XD
A decade later and I still gotta watch this every now and then.
Yup me too
Optic stems tho 😂😂😂😂
Them hugging them trees when they heard their wives 😂😂🤣🤣💀💀
😭😭😭💀💀💀
@Smiles and the Twisted MD GRAMMAR NAZI
@Smiles and the Twisted MD I'm looking you straight in the windows of your soul..... Biiitttttttccccccchhhhhhhh
@Smiles and the Twisted MD Merry Christmas hun
"I said biiiiiiiiiiiiii-"
"Hey guys!"
"HEY GIRLS, HOW YOU DOIN?!"
Fallout Plays fallout!!!!
Fallout Plays are you high on pot-enuse?
Fallout Plays this shit is fucking funny...i said ................😬bbbbbbbiiiiittttccchhhhh! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😋😋😋😋
Fallout Plays lol
Fallout Plays that's at 1:08
Even scared in the spaceship 🚀😂. Then they are talking in the Milky-way
Key: Did you say beach though?
Peele: Gets lost in the black hole 🕳 & still looking for wife , yeah ( stammering) .
_Best video ever made by Key & Peele_ 💯👍🏼
If they were on earth they would be in the milky way. The milky way is the galaxy we live in.
Then in heaven they’re looking around and say beeeeeeech
2:08 Key's face is extremely hilarious
"Washing machine is huge! You can fit a whole bunch of clothes in there!" Bruh
lol
LMAAOO
16 year old me laughing at this video thinking "it can't be this bad"
24 year old me waiting an hour for gf to get ready and suddenly remembered this video.
Edit: And I said beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech
CrayCow yeah my dude it’s too true
You guys serious!? Is it that bad??
Avaneesh Srivastava Women you can’t live with them and you can’t live without them bud lol you’ll see one day
@@codythom2619 😂😂😂
Did you said biiiiitch?
Still one of the best skits in sketch comedy.
3:22 DAR-RYL 😂😂😂
"I'm going to show her the dishwasher" lol yeah I'm sure. The ladies are having the same convo in reverse 😂
"that ass knew I wanted to go to taylors, he KNEW it. And he still went through 7 more restaurants before he said it! I looked him dead in the eye and I said...
@@FFKonoko .....
What's the male equivalent for bitch?
Yeah, except all the horrible things they claim to say, they actually said them. Because their men are whipped they don’t have to fear retaliation.
@@denimchicken104 Ever talked to a woman before??? They do the same shit, and lie about it too.
No seriously, the exact same. I just saw an insta story by some girl who claimed she said "nahhh, fuck off bitch" to her boyfriend, but in reality I was there and she didn't say anything
Pravdax M listen here, buddy. I have never... ever... spoken to a woman in my entire life. So take that.
“No, She didnt Craig!” LMAO I love it when your friends seem more hype about your situation than you
This will never be topped
Can't believe this is 10 years old already... what an absolute classic ❤❤
love how this dude hugs the tree, then closes his eyes. Couldn't keep my shit together.
even better when he does the look as he turns his head back
"Ain't nothing but a thing"
Da Floata 😂😂😂😂😂
Came back from charlie
Me too man
Instantly did.
Bruh
Still iconic
I sais
I sais
I sais
** scouts like a damn meerkat **
ᴮⁱⁱⁱⁱⁱⁱⁱᵗᶜʰ
*You really said that?*
That exact one came on wen I seen this😭
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 ..
Im laughing harder than i should
@@haza123b4 ua-cam.com/video/3r1Iz0BgN8w/v-deo.html
NASA official: What are guys doing you can’t ride a rocket ship?
Jordan and Keegan: We gotta talk about our wives.
NASA official: Here’s the keys
and peeles
Im going to need that rocket few times a week 😁
It's why it was man not woman putting first step in the moon. And Armstrong said beeeoootchh. Yup in her eyeballs.
Numegssi 😂😂
Albert Ochoa nice man!
Haha
This is the official thesaurus for 'eyes'
2:54 Key practicing his Toad voice for the Super Mario movie.
“I look this woman dead in the windows of her soul” 😂
Anyone notice the progression? "I looked her in the eyes... I looked her in the eye sockets... I looked her in her optic spams.... I looked her in the windows of her soul...."
+Sbeth85 Everything progresses even the settings
MrCapeCanaveral haha that's mean
+Sbeth85 That would be optic stems though.
+Kevin Burton that makes much more sense! I re-listened a few times and couldn't make it out.
+Sbeth85 true comedy
3:51 In space, nobody hears you saying "biiii..."
I showed this to my wife. She was not amused.
But did you say it tho? Lol! You definitely didn't,lol!
That Biiiiiiii
2:35-When he hugs the tree and closes his *own* eyes... like u can't see him if they're closed!!!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
lisa karson This is even more funnier to me because he favors my hubby and this is something he’d do and actually thinks by doing this he can’t be heard or seen!!!! Too funny!!!!🤣
Sometimes hiding the whites of your eyes actually does help camouflage.
You said bitch though?
Huh?
You said bitch?
Uuhhhhh, y-y-yea, right.
lisa karson 😂
He wasn't closing his eyes so she won't see him, she was closing her eyes because he was praying. *"Dear God, don't let this woman find me"*
*Craig gave her a list of SEVEN restaurants.*
*I guess you could call it Craig's list.*
No, Craig, NO!!
Badumm Tssss
BOOOOOOOO
@@pashadyne You didn't get the joke.
*ba dum tsss*
"Hey guys!" Hahahhahhaha
The comedic timing is incredible
Anytime I hear an eagle screech in a comedy, I die laughing.
That is a falcon sound. The more you know.
@@kaishuno Thanks pickle. Still cracks me up.
but did u die tho?
@@sangeyasha1866 We're all dead until we're washed in the blood of Christ.
So yes.
@xxGodx It was a joke my dude. You went 0-60 on trolling real fast.
Lol her "OpTic Stems" 😂😂😂😂
damn bro you been playin too much call of duty
+JoshLikeCrazy lol 😂
#Titanfall2MasterRace
ɷ Heey Friendss I Have F0unddd W0roking Online Hacck visittttt : - t.co/04ALFYwCqk
These comments 😂
2:50 that bird sound just kills it
This will always be one of my favorite K&P sketches 😆
This will never ever get old. Hands down my favorite
WHEN THEY IN THE FIELD AND HE PULL OUT SOME BINOCULARS I DIED
*How do they still look around in space for their wives😂*
Thots are everywhere
I don't know but the one in the dress tho
@@DUB_87 cause she darkskin?
RÉvsVEVO
The could be on their way onto the ship
@@shawnhall3849 true though😂😂😂
9 years ago. How time flies bruh
The binoculars took me out💀